/vt/ - Virtual Youtubers

Coco wasn't my gateway to Hololive or VTubers nor my favorite. And I only started watching her very shortly before first yab vacays. I liked some of her content, membered right away and kept dropping SC whenever I can in the free chat rooms. In short: Kiryu Coco wasn't my oshi, but I respected the resilience and creativity she represented. She was like an anchor cementing my new hobby in otherwise gloomy, stormy and fickle present times.

And now her graduation reminded me of "Memento Mori". Essentially a fundamental property of space-time where things can't happen simultaneously, everywhere, eternally and therefore there will always be insufficiency, deficiency, lack of something. Suffering. It's silly that grown-ass dude is reminded of such basic thing by orange 2D woman quitting streaming, but it is what it is in our raffinated, urbanized, manchild-coddling society.
Can't say that I cried, I used to do it a lot, before futility and wastefulness of the act one day just suddenly hit me and I stopped doing it altogether. Actually almost forgot what it feels like. Throat getting tight, stomach getting cold, eyes burning up.

First Impact for me was when my oshi took more unannounced vacations than I could handle to bear, I had to cut her content off completely to restore my mental state back to level one needs to function in society.
Second Impact was m*ales, not necessarily in Hololive, but a realization that female chuubas to interact with other males. I've cut a lot of YT\Twitch memberships and subs after that.
Thirt Impact is this. I don't think I can continue to enjoy VTubers in any capacity. While Coco wasn't at the forefront of my hobby, she turned out to be a cornerstone of stability. An illusion of stability which is now gone. It's not the black company bullying rrats that are important here, but just grim, sobering reminder that VTubers are fickle, temporary existances too. Matsuri nailed it.

With every thing I care about dying or going to shit, there's a perspective evaluation in order. Hololive & VTubers aren't. Not sure where it would lead me or if I would like it there.

Sleep tight, orange dragon ヤクザ woman.