/vt/ - Virtual Youtubers

You will never be Japanese.The creators you love and cherish do not hate you, but are indifferent and have mixed feelings towards your existence. You are a statistic, a string of words, sums of cash that only mean something to them collectively. This isn't an 'evil' attitude, it's very reasonable. How would you feel towards your own fans if you were in the same scenario? The distance between chubas and viewers is vast. The pain is real, it's real because every gachikoi knew that none of it was real from the beginning, but in the deepest and most shameful parts of their hearts they believed someone cared for them personally, no matter how absurd and obviously untrue that was. It's very difficult to look in the mirror and know that you are a disgusting person that no one will love, and that you will never experience the intimacy you desire, and that even if you do, it might not actually make you feel any better. You will die alone, no one will mourn you. The pain and heaviness you feel will never leave you.