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[ERROR] No.56281779 [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

What do you think the grooming and hygine regimens are for various fantasy races? what are their standards for this kinda thing?

Are orcs really as filthy as people say? are elves as clean?

>> No.56281821

>>56281779
Orcs are surprisingly cleanly. They bathe in running water whenever they can find a clean source, and scour their bodies in the ashes of conquest (never the ashes of the dead, unless it was a mighty foe.) This gives them a strong, dusky smell like woodsmoke or burning leaves - a surefire way to tell that an recently victorious orc is sneaking up on you from behind if you have the nose to know.

For all their glimmering starlight and soft supple silks, elves are like ancient europeans: They never, ever bathe. That 2qt4me 12/10 high elf waifu you've been dreaming off doesn't even realize she's supposed to wipe the piss off her inner thighs. Hope you like elven gold.

>> No.56281847

>>56281779
Any warlike race that isn't retarded will realise that battlefield hygiene is essential to sustained warfare. Unless they're a race of vermin who can survive living in their own filth, you're going to need decent physicians and even the dumbest among you should know to boil the water before you use it.

>> No.56281867

>>56281821
that actually makes sense, elven superiority and the like. They'd probably be offended at the idea that they could EVER be unclean, and see bathing as a 'lesser race' sort of thing. think their shit's as pure as the driven snow.

>> No.56283087

>>56281821

>>56281779
>Have a fetish(?) for /fit/, brown wood elves
>Probably wouldn't have access to soap
>Wouldn't know about brushing her teeth, her mouth would reek
>Probably doesn't even wipe her butt like a fucking animal
>No deodorant, smells like piss
At least they don't naturally grow bodyhair right? Riiiiiiiight?

>> No.56283101

>>56281779
Elvs suk adn smlee of peepee poopoo becus tehy are suk and bad and smell haha elvse suk

>> No.56283176

Post the one about centaurs and the miracle of the horse anus

>> No.56283488

>>56283087
>Before toothbrushes, people used rough cloth and water to clean their teeth. They would also rub things like salt and chalk across their teeth to try to get rid of the grime.

>> No.56283587

>>56281821
>Goldberry

>> No.56283639

>>56283087
Fuck off.

>> No.56283647

>>56283639
Came here to say this

>> No.56283671

>>56281821

>> No.56283674

>>56281779
Depends on the setting.
Elves are usually depicted as otherworldly and superior beings. Thus, they would be very cleanly.

Orcs are often depicted as filthy barbarians so they'd be messy and nasty. Note that they often paint themselves with blood and mud and possibly shit. Very intimidating and cool, but not very cleanly.

>> No.56283759

>>56281821
Where are dwarves on the cleanliness scale?

>> No.56283795

>>56283759
Dwarves have some very odd ideas about the miasma and humours, and how disease spreads, but at least they know how to use soap.

>> No.56283809

>>56283488
I'm willing to believe that's better than nothing, but does that really help combat bad breath?

>> No.56284545

>>56281779
Besides the obvious (setting, culture, personal preferences) you have to look at the situation you are in. Just think about the difference of beeing at home, weekend-camping or away from any constant supplies, maybe even in harsh eviroments. You can't expect to keep the best hygine if you are a in the middle of nowhere, with no fresh water not to mention other supplies.
So in general an adventurer is much more likely to be smelly then a villager, no matter if elf, orc or whatever.

Another aspect is how resistent a race is to diseases paired with how much you care about "good looks". If your race is next to immune to it it would be an advantage to not giving a shit.

>> No.56284874

>>56281779
Dwarves clean themselves in communal hot bathes, different ones for different social castes. Miners, merchants, farmers, nobility, and such, all with different bathes, all of which require great reserves of water taken from various sources and pumped and heated through vast systems of pipes.

Most elves employ either a special clothe ensorcelled with the cleaning aspect of Prestidigitation, and use simple ponds, streams, and other sources of tended and specially maintained sources of clean fresh water to bath in. Even the desert elves, whose bathes you will never find.

Humans are disgusting. Stinky little apes. They do as in real life obviously.

Dragonborn use soft sand rubbed across their scales, taking any dirt and grime with it. Cleaning of the genitals is done with rags or washcloths.

Gnolls engage in mutual cleaning in family baths, brushing the fur with special combs, at least the civilized ones. Otherwise, they are disgusting smelly disease ridden cult beasts better put down.

Halflings: We just don't know. They obviously must do something, but we just don't know. The halfling god of knowledge is also the halfling god of secrets, and if she wants it to be hidden it stays hidden. We Just Don't Know.

Ratfolk do nothing privately if it saves space and is social. Imagine 30 (or more) people all talking and cleaning and brushing and just being a little too touchy feely for human or elven or dwarven tastes. Some of the most sophisticated and technologically innovative cleaning rooms found anywhere, more so than the comparatively crude systems the dwarves have.

Gnomes: Prestidigitation.

The Ipotane appreciate a fine scrapping with dull knifelike implements after a good run or bit of wrestling. No finer way to remove the froth of sweat from their horse like flesh. Other races might disagree, but who are these upstarts to challenge such a fine tradition.

>> No.56284961

>>56281779
>blood elves
bathe in blood
>orcs
bathe only as a religious sacrament before battle
>dwarves
bathe daily because they are the most refined and civilized
>elves
bathe daily but keep body odor for romantic exposure (no deoderant or perfume)
>humans
bathe whenever the fuck they feel like it, usually in groups
>ocean elves
bathe consistently but often let work get in the way with long hours consuming hygiene time
>lizardmen
who the fuck needs to bathe
>ogres
barbarian races don't give a fuck about bathing
>gnomes
bathe regularly
>rock dwarves
who bathes when they don't sweat
>ice dwarves
who bathes when it literally kills them
>fire orcs
who bathes when your stench shows your extent by which you work/fight
>holy orcs
bathe regularly, but only because civilized dwarves tell them to
>cursed humans doomed to rot forever
bathing is for the ones that regularly heal themselves and want to blend in despite it being difficult
>gods
bathe only when in mortal form, hasn't happened for 500 years. Varying racial gods tend to bathe in the way their kin do.
>monsters
who the fuck cares about bathing when there's eating and killing to do
>betrayer elves who cut off their heads and replaced them with magic animal heads
bathe twice daily because they were always more civilized than dwarves, and always will be

>> No.56286298

>>56281821
>ancient europeans
>never bathing
nice meme faggot

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