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File: 856 KB, 1057x895, Excuse me commissar 2.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34447230 No.34447230 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

Excuse me, Commissar, but how is Abbadon still in command? I appreciate that he's a great warrior and blessed by all four Chaos Gods, but he's launched and failed thirteen separate crusades, many of them against Cadia, a planet of ordinary humans. Being the champion of just a single Chaos God implies competence enough to at least take substantial Imperial holdings, but he's utterly failed to accomplish anything of significance for tens of thousands of years! Even if the Chaos Gods themselves won't abandon him, shouldn't his lieutenants and soldiers just ignore his apparently tactically unsound orders?

>> No.34447267

>>34447230
1) He hasn't launched 13 of them.
2) They have not been failures, you're just assuming each one was aimed at destroying the Imperium.

>> No.34447290

>>34447230
>Excuse me, Commissar, but how is Abbadon

*BLAM*

Did anyone else hear that name? Anyone?

*BLAM* *BLAM*

>> No.34447305

The Chaos Gods are the ones who judge the success and failure of their campaigns, not mortals.
I am sure the last 12 times most of the Gods got what they wanted, or else they wouldn't have signed on for the next go around.
>what were the objectives of the Black Crusades?

>> No.34447312

>>34447290
This is the only correct way to Commissar.

>> No.34447346

>to the charred corpses of the executed Guardsmen:
"There is no point in questioning the motives of those touched by Chaos. They are crazy, nothing they do makes any sense. If they had a shred of logic they would be worshipping the Emperor. Now to the servitor reclamation station with you."

>> No.34447356

>>34447267
He has lead 13 of them but there was other crusades that are not part of the 13

>> No.34447368

>>34447290
N-n-n-no sir! Resuming latrine duty, sir!

>> No.34447465

>>34447290
Pretty much this, dont know what would have if a guardsmen is suddenly able to name all 4 chaos gods.
Even more troublesome: in the eldar language

>> No.34447502

I pity whatever the chaos equivalent of the Zathras be.

>> No.34447529

>>34447230
Excuse me, Commissar, but what do we do with xeno equipment after we have cleansed the alien from the current world? Do we destroy it ourselves or do we let the techpriests handle that?

>> No.34447576
File: 129 KB, 720x540, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34447576

>asking questions about chaos

>> No.34447627

>>34447529
>asking questions about xeno tech

>> No.34447639
File: 1.31 MB, 1024x1476, Cultist____by_C_L_E_O_N.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34447639

>>34447502

Excuuze me Dranon, baht voo deen teet be more vorthvile to trow tousands of culteests at the e-ne-my to pick new chaos marine reecroots, instead of at eech other?

>> No.34447693

>>34447639
fuck this needs to be a thing every time an "Excuse me, Commissar..." thread gets posted

>> No.34447709
File: 247 KB, 883x593, Blam.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34447709

>>34447529

>> No.34447742

>>34447230
>but he's launched and failed thirteen separate crusades

Except that isn't true. A Black Crusade isn't an attempt at overthrowing the Imperium; it's just a term given to the occasions where an abnormally large, unified Chaos invasion is launched from within the Eye. All of the Black Crusades launched by Abaddon resulted in Abaddon achieving his goals, and therefor were successes.

>> No.34447810

>>34447230
Crusade timeline for your history lesson
1 - Abaddon attacks the imperium, Cadia is largely undefended thousands of worlds burn. Drachnyen is found
2 - Abs leads a blunt force attack on recently fortified cadian system, fails miserably but multiple chaos armies fall into neighboring systems to cause havoc and slaughter
3 - Abs launches distraction attack on cadia with disposable yet unusually powerful daemon prince after convincing it that space marine blood would give it more power. Abs meanwhile puts on a shit eating grin and desecrates the shrine world of Saint Gerstahl stealing Saint Gerstahl's corpse ruining all manner of prophecy.
4 - Abs destroys Citadel of Kromarch while distraction army besieges cadia. Abs nearly arrives at terra but a last minute slaughter party delays him enough that he needs to retreat. Imperial losses are staggering enough to be felt in all imperial sectors
5 - Abs wrecks ancient imperial city of Kasyr Lutien, invades dozen worlds within the sector to ruin them, creates a sector-wide conflict that would provoke a massive response from the Imperium and draw in Chapters of the Adeptus Astartes. mass sacrifice of ten million citizens. Doombreed + 1k bloodletters arrive and rape the marines
6 - Abs launches some successful battles but really just wanted to get a rival warlord killed. (Abs powerklaws him in the back as they celebrate victory)
7 - Hide and seek. Lots of raids. Blood angels massacred
8 - Big fancy pilgrimage ship gets sacrificed. tens of thousands sacrificed across the sector to create "patterns creating a mathematical equation of terrible and profane perfection" Forge world mutant uprising instigated as the high council of tech priests gets sacrificed in their own gears. tzeentch is pleased
9 - Huge massacre, massive amounts of reinforcements respond. Where are they? OH SHIT ITS RAINING CYCLONIC TORPEDOES. Abs ravages the sector freely for years

>> No.34447874

>>34447639
8/10
Couldn't read.

>> No.34447938

>>34447810
10 - Hidden passage from warp used. Capital world of another area attacked as a distraction, Chaos warlords deployed errywhere. Iron hands and iron warriors have a grudge match. Medusa system burns before reinforcements arrive. Reinforcements finally arrive, abs is gone.
11 - Abaddon tries to use a tzeentch daemon to guide him through the warp jump into reality. Daemon goes nuts, abs ends up thousands of light years off course. Random ass attack on a capital world. SUDDENLY ORK WAAAGH!!! Daemons and orks everywhere. Abs tries to pimp up the orks with daemons. The experiment seems to be going along pretty well. Abs takes a few thousand orks back with him rather than finishing the job.
12 - hundreds of planetary invasions and naval battles, Abs retreats when reinforcements arrive. Imperial casualties in the billions, several planets became asteroid fields, 6 blackstone fortresses ruined.
13 - First non-distraction attack on cadia since 2, Abs gets a foothold on Cadia and in the system. Abs intends to keep driving on before triggering an event that swallows terra into the warp.

>> No.34447961

>>34447874
>Excuse me Dranon,, but wouldnt it be more worthwile to throw thousands of cultists at the enemy to pick new chaos marine recruits, instead of each other.

Would be my guess.

>> No.34447969

>>34447938
In reality Abaddon was successful on a massive scale in all but one crusade. Even when he failed he still caused horrific imperial casualties and a lot of chaos in a variety of systems.

Seems like a good enough track record.

>> No.34448013

>>34447961

That's correct!

I actually fucked up her speech less than I should have, forgetting to turn the vowels long near the end. "peek noo kay-oss muhreen", "eenstead ov at eech ahzer", etc.

>> No.34448047

>>34447639
10/10

>> No.34448156

>>34448013
I just dont get what you mean with "throwing cultists to get CSM recruits".

>> No.34448177
File: 77 KB, 404x466, Untitled.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34448177

Why are the Space Wolves not been exterminated yet?

They are dangerous retards who don't give a fuck about literally anything, even the Inquisition.

>> No.34448192

>>34448156

Throwing cultists at each other. It is in reference to the mass battles that Chaos Space Marines host to "weed out the weak". Obviously they don't literally toss cultists like softballs.

Most of the time, anyway.

>> No.34448219

>>34448177

It is because they wolf any cats who dare to piss on their territory. They can outright wolfing wolf them to wolf.

>> No.34448239

>>34448177
Go ahead, call and exterminatus on them, Im watching from over the other side of the galaxy.

>>34448192
Ooooooh, now I get it, I thought you throw them at SMs and somehow they go like: lets become heretic!

But yeah, surviving cultists getting promoted to be CSM sounds btter.

>> No.34448258

>>34447639
And now we need someone to draw cultist-chan into imperial guard gear.

>> No.34448299

>>34448258
Whenever I see cultist chan I remember this pic with her on the bed.
Fuck you guys, you damage people for life.

>> No.34448302

>>34447230
We'll never admit this publicly, but most of those black crusades have been successes; ending with the destructon, defilement or capturing of key assets, all of which led up to this, the thirteenth crusade.

>> No.34448328

>>34448192
They do use them as party crackers though. They each grab and arm and a leg each, and whichever one has more mass on the half they rip off is the winner. Mind you this is World Eaters. The Iron Warriors on the other hand consider parties inefficient and just work the cultists to death instead.

>> No.34448395

>>34448177
1. Cult of Fenris predates the Imperial Creed
2. Codex Astartas is really more of a guideline, the Wolves never signed on so they are not bound by it.
3. NONE CAN DENY THEIR LOYALTY
4. They don't dick around, if for some reason they decided to turn traitor, they would send every warrior they have straight to the Golden Throne. High chance of them destroying it.

>> No.34448530

>>34448177
Space wolves never broke legion. Space wolves have an unusually large legion even by pre heresy standards. Space wolves love to openly kill anyone who calls to question the loyalty of their chapter them. Space wolves have regular chapter size blobs of marines with fleets in almost all imperial sectors ready to fuck up anything that attacks their chapter or worlds

>> No.34448551

>>34448395
>4. They don't dick around, if for some reason they decided to turn traitor, they would send every warrior they have straight to the Golden Throne. High chance of them destroying it.

Top lel. That's quite enough of your Wolfwank, Mr King.

>> No.34448565

>>34448530
>Space wolves have regular chapter size blobs of marines with fleets in almost all imperial sectors ready to fuck up anything that attacks their chapter or worlds

Well, did help them when Magnus was invading their planet.

>> No.34448655

>>34448551
If the entire chapter showed up all at once in Sol System and tried to slay the emperor, of course most of it not all of them would be destroyed, but not before a heavy bombardment and lots and lots of drop pods land in the palace.
A Space Wolf will impale himself on the enemies sword if he knows he can tear out their neck.

>> No.34448682

>>34448655
>and lots of drop pods land in the palace.
Arent Custodians there for preventing just that? Like preventing such sudden attacks?

>> No.34448737

>>34448682
Well yeah, 99% of the Wolves will die very very quickly.
Only takes one to make it to the finish line to finish the job.

>> No.34448751

>>34448737
Too bad there's at most 3000 Wolves

>> No.34448756

>>34448655
Wouldn't work. Any ship in the Sol system is dead already. Should some miracle allow the firing of pods and ordnance toward terra the offending pods/missiles would be vaporized long before any harm could be done. Should energy weapons be used the uncountable amount of void shields surrounding almost every major area on terra would stop them if the arcane archeotech did not simply absorb, reflect, or otherwise reuse the beams. Should an even greater manipulation of reality occur allowing some sort of teleportation onto the planet (Which cannot occur due to shielding and archeotech) Whatever landed would be ass raped by uncounted marines, guard, custodes, assassins, titan legios, animate archeotech fortresses, Servitors, and possibly thunderwarriors if they are brought out of stasis.

>> No.34448773

>>34448530
Except at max they've got 2400 marines, with the reality being closer to around 1900-2000.

>> No.34448779

>>34448751
Closer to 13k actually

>> No.34448791

>>34448737
But arent custodians like... only under the Emporer and Primarchs in powerlevel?
Like sure, Wolves sound especially vicious in The Battle of the Fang, but they also look pretty rage driven and surely way weaker than Custodians.

>> No.34448839

>>34448779
Actually furthest from wrong possible. People have done calculations and fluff says no. The second biggest great company is said to have a bit less than 200 marines and only bested in size by Ragnar's company.

>> No.34448862

>>34448791
In one of the HH novels a World Eater killed a Custodian in single combat.
Custodians are like Gray Knights but without witchgifts, pretty badass but not godlike.

It would be sort of like newly promoted to full battle brothers vs veterans.

>> No.34448888

>>34448779
Care to explain how? Ragnar Blackmane's Great Company is fully detailed in the latest codex and has always been known as one of the largest and even it only has 168 marines.

>> No.34448904

>>34448888
184*
Miscounted.

>> No.34448911

>>34447312
Technically, he should have had the man flogged when he opened his mouth and the first word was not "sir." Followed by the execution, of course. Although it may serve as a good lesson to the troops to execute him and then have his corpse publicly flogged.

>> No.34448987

>>34448862
>World Eater
Considering World Eaters pact with the ruinous powers and Space Wolves dont I would say it really depends on what happened there.

>> No.34449043

>>34448888
Space wolves numbered over 10k pre heresy, they have only grown in number.
You are only counting great companies.
Apart from great companies there are huge numbers of regular companies not represented in the ruling groups.
Apart from regular companies there are lost companies and one lost great company.
Apart from structured companies there are Mutants, dreadnaughts, and other less organized groups of space wolves.

>> No.34449078

>>34448987
"Loyalist" World Eater and other not traitor Marines from other "Traitor" Legions jailed on Terra.
>fuck this shit we are just ganna get killed anyway, lets bust out
>1k Sons Marines uses his Wizard Powers to bust them out, World Bro disarms a Custodian and kills him with his own spear.
Don't remember if the World Eater survived the fight, but he did "win".

>> No.34449139

>>34448987
Custodes are way more physically powerful than a grey knight. They are on par or better than an average captain. Custodes are still mortal though.

Custodes are tough but terra has worse things to throw at invaders.

>> No.34449142
File: 284 KB, 737x720, 1409006424948.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34449142

>>34447230
I just want to say as someone who knows nothing about 40k asides from what I picked up from /tg/, these are my favorite threads

>> No.34449171

>>34449078
Was that the same World Eater who ripped the heart out of a custodian while naked and unarmed?

>> No.34449186

>>34449171
Yeah that sounds about right.
Been awhile since I read Outcast Dead.

>> No.34449219

>>34447639
Cultist doesn't work for that. She's too stupid and blindly faithful to question Chaos.

Two things that Zathrases can't seem to manage.

>> No.34449240

>>34449219
Asking stupid questions sounds like a very chaotic thing to do

>> No.34449345

>>34447230
Excuse me, Commissar, but how are chaos spawn made?

>> No.34449384

>>34449345
*BLAM*

Recruits should not speak heresy about chaos spawn. Wait! No! I didn't mean it- *OHSWEETJESUSMOTHEROFGODNOOOOOOOOOOO!!GLARBLBLBLBL*

>> No.34449589
File: 87 KB, 732x406, 1405296561076.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34449589

>>34447639
>Posting anything Cultist-chan related

>> No.34449652

>>34447230
>shouldn't his lieutenants and soldiers just ignore his apparently tactically unsound orders?
You have to be completely batshit to follow Chaos like that. Which they all are.

>> No.34449671

>>34449043
Got a source for these non-great company companies?

>> No.34449829

>>34449671
The Mediocre Companies of Obvious Traitor Chapters that Pretend Loyalty and Murder the Shit out of All Loyalists Who Say Otherwise

By Ulf Ulfsson, Chief Archivist of the Loyal Space Wolves.

>> No.34450276

>>34449829
I like Ultramarines better. They are stronk, and more badass than Space Wolves.

>> No.34450342
File: 12 KB, 220x253, 220px-Joseph_D._Kucan_at_gamescom_2009.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34450342

>>34450276
0/10 try harder (to remove kebab)

>> No.34450830
File: 117 KB, 338x895, ultramarines truth.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34450830

>>34450342

>> No.34450992

>>34447230

Chaos isn't sane

>> No.34451219

>>34450276
I actually agree, mostly because I despise the pseudo-Viking stuff.
Pseudo-Roman fits the setting a lot better. Plus, they don't ruin everything about what they base it on like they do with the Space Wolves.

Disgusting.

>> No.34452259

>>34447529
We cleanse it by throwing it into the nearest star.

also

*BLAM*

>> No.34452317

>>34448177
First founding chapters have a lot of clot and an entire sub-empire to themselves.

Inquisition can fuck with a generic nth chapter from bumfuck nowhere (especially the 21st ones) but now a first founding one.

>> No.34454149

Can't space wolves only recruit from fenris meaning they have low recruitment numbers and it takes only 1 planet cracker to finish them off.

>> No.34454326

>>34448911
>execute him and then have his corpse publicly flogged
Are you 100% sure that's in the right order?

>> No.34454377

>>34454326
>Guardsman was executed and publicly flogged for this post

>> No.34454903
File: 488 KB, 500x3327, Serving_Gods_Khorne_by_Mr_Culexus.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34454903

>>34449589

>> No.34455515

>>34447639
Of course not. Where would the senseless cruelty and needless waste of resources be?

>> No.34455545

>>34447529
We stampit with imperial logo and hand them out. Why do you think that plasma rifle hasn't blown you up yet?

>> No.34455562

>>34454326
Well you can't very well have a corpse publicly flogged if its still alive now can you?

>> No.34455601

>>34448756
Don't forget literally trillions of fanatic pilgrims with nothing to lose.

>> No.34456107
File: 99 KB, 511x486, 1372876209610.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34456107

Why aren't Ark Mechanicus ships not being sacked when they clearly have machine sentience?
Don't tell me its because the Mechanicus doesn't know, because they must do. They've been plugging into those things before since even before the great crusade!

>> No.34456157 [DELETED] 
File: 798 KB, 1600x841, Breezy.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34456157

>>34454903
>>34447639

>> No.34457233

>>34447230

There's a part of me that's very amused by this question, because IIRC, most Commissars don't have the security clearance to know much about Abbadon, or the nature of Chaos.

>> No.34457277
File: 129 KB, 775x800, 1391376176509.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34457277

>>34456107
Your sources must be highly inaccurate. The machine spirit that inhabits the Ark Mechanicus ships are simply vast and ancient, wise with the years. They are clearly not Silica Animus. I do not understand your conviction of the notion.

>> No.34457541

>>34449171
fully armoured Custodes with spear might I add

>> No.34457564

>>34448791
In one HH novel, when describing the Custodes, they said no one would know who would win in a fight between a Space Marine and a Custodes, so more or less they would be equal, if not a little stronger.

>> No.34459178
File: 63 KB, 500x566, 40k - tf2 edition.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34459178

>>34447230
Excuse me Commissar, but if The Exorcists Space Marines are a successor of the Grey Knights, why don't they have at least half of their equipment from them?

>> No.34459638

>>34448239
>Go ahead, call and exterminatus on them, Im watching from over the other side of the galaxy.
>Im watching from over the other side of the galaxy.
>the other side of the galaxy.
Marneus Calgar? Is that you?

>> No.34459714

>>34459178
>Excuse me Commissar, but if The Exorcists Space Marines are a successor of the Grey Knights, why don't they have at least half of their equipment from them?

Because their gene-seed lineage is unknown and FFG a shit, Guardsman.

>> No.34459758

>>34447230
>implying the Black Crusades failed
>implying they stir and uprising of emotions that further empowered the Ruinous Powers

>> No.34459800

>>34459178
Wait... Is there some rule that a chapter that gets a successor chapter must give out half their gear to them? Wouldn't this mean that the Ultramarines have something like one terminator suit left rather than the full company of 100 suits for 1st company + Calgar's suit and perhaps even more?

>> No.34459834

>>34459178
Because that's not how successor chapters work?

All it means is that you're made from that chapter's gene-seeds. Other than that, you're using the bog standard codex formation with bog standard codex equipment. Some chapters, like ultras, help with the formation of new chapters from their lineage and sometimes chapters even give up a portion of their own chapter to help the formation of a new chapter.

DA and SW never really had "new" chapter made from them, they're just the old legions split up, so they naturally have the same stuff and culture. DA also keep close contact with one another behind the scenes and SW are all stationed on the same planet, so naturally they'll be very similar with same culture and equipment.

I doubt even the Exorcists know much about the GK, let alone they even exist. At least the standard troops. Vets and officers are sure to know more.

>>34459714
Nothing to do with FFG. I think it was some BL novel that had an Exorcist say they and GK are practically brothers or something equal to that effect. And then there's the fact that the Exorcists are super daemon killers, commissioned and sponsored by Malleus, etc.

>> No.34459868

>>34459834
>I think it was some BL novel that had an Exorcist say they and GK are practically brothers or something equal to that effect.

Yet the Grey Knights consider them almost heretics.

>And then there's the fact that the Exorcists are super daemon killers, commissioned and sponsored by Malleus, etc.

Entirely different. Exorcists have increased resistance to Chaos because they get possessed. grey Knights would never allow their gene-seed to be desecrated in such a manner.

>> No.34459874

>>34450342
KANE LIVES IN DEATH

>> No.34459911

>>34459834
SW haven't had successors made ever since the first attempt and that thing with the *AHEM* Anyway there won't be any successors chapters for SW anymore, but why wouldn't the DA have more successor chapters?

Their Geneseed is stable and as far as the lords of Terra know they are a loyal chapter. (Wasn't there some old stat table that showed the % of chapters created from each primarch's geneseed?)

>> No.34459957

>>34459911
DA are not allowed successors because of their scheming and inner circle bullshit, which the High Lords interpret as legion building, and they don't want to add to their numbers any further.

Says so in their codex.

>> No.34459959

>>34459911
>as far as the lords of Terra know they are a loyal chapter.

Actually the High lords distrust them, and that's why there are so few Dark Angel successors.
Ultras make at least 67% of Marines.
Fists are second place.

>> No.34459991

>>34450342
>brose through /tg/
>suddenly the Prophet appears

PEACE THROUGH POWER! PEACE THROUGH POWER!

>> No.34460022
File: 249 KB, 360x913, dare-you-read-gk-codex-wd.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34460022

>>34459868
Where is it said GK consider them heretics?

Exorcism only makes you immune to further possessions, it does not make you super effective daemon killer second only to GK. And who the fuck cares what the GK think? If the High Lords want to wipe their asses with GK gene-seeds, they're free to do so and GK can't say shit.

Also, GK, with all your daemon storing, heretical material gathering, daemon weapon wielding, alien weapon using, blood rituals, etc., how about you get off your high horse a bit, ok?

>> No.34460072

>>34456107
>AdMech
>knowing anything

>> No.34460134

>>34449139
>terra has worse things?
Like what?

I'm serious, let's make a thought exercise about this. I have Black Crusade players who are always itching to invade Terra or Mars or Ryza and I would love some ideas for "rocks fall, everybody dies" type things.

>Ancient Tech-Priest constructs?
>Palace guards using gear from the DAoT?
>Multi-locked airtight security doors that require a key made of glass from the sands of Denmark?
>An innocuous blue box harnessed to a weapon of incalculable destruction?

>> No.34460194
File: 90 KB, 1069x751, Aaron Dembski-Bowden explains Abaddon.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34460194

Anyone read the new Abaddon novel?

My copy hasn't arrived yet and I wanna know what I am getting into.

>> No.34460198

>>34460134

Just something that was in the Inquisitor war books, but the door outside the Emperor's room are flanked by two Titans. They appear to be statues partially sunk into the walls and floor but are actually fully functional with a crew waiting inside at all times and with some time to turn on the generators they can step up and fight to defend the Emperor.

They do have enough power to turn some random troublemaker to paste with their Titan power fists if they try to get inside the door without permission at any time...

>> No.34460216

>>34460134
>endless human swarms of Indic ferro-hives
>enough holy incense in the air to give Abaddon a sunburn
>that's not a moon, that's a lunar fortress making a suicide run!
>The Emperor is In Another Castle

>> No.34460224

>>34447969
No he wasn't. He has inflicted next to no lasting damage to the empire as a whole. Billions of casualties is something the IG can absorb without undue trouble.
Points against abs is that Cadia still stands. He has never managed to make permanent gains towards controlling the gate in spite of how massive an advantage it would be for him not to have to fight through that bottleneck every time they try to leave the eye.
The 13th crusade is the closest Abs has come to making any kind of real headway towards destroying the empire.

>> No.34460251
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34460251

Excuse me, /tg/, but if the Eye of Terror is most dangerous place in the universe filled with nasty daemons and abominations as well as fallen marines, then why haven't the Orks invaded the place in force?

We have only one recorded Ork invasion of the Eye and it seems to have happened by luck. By all logic, the Eye of Terror should be swarming with Orks.

>> No.34460271

>>34460194
Abaddon whines and cries and is soothed by his mother/whore figure. His special friends make snarky comments thought.

>> No.34460288

>>34460251
Orks talk shit and get hit.
All bark, no bite.

>> No.34460313

>>34460251
The orks are flies that hover around the rotten meat of the Imperium's corpse. They are filthy vermin, with no understanding of true power, and no capacity for anything greater than vermin. They are to be swept aside like so much dust in the eyes of the Gods.

>> No.34460326
File: 181 KB, 500x1800, 1403874022975.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34460326

>>34460251

Warboss Tuska knew damn well what he was doing when he launched a WAAAAGH into the warp.

As for why others haven't.. well, the Warp is a tumultuous place of devastation, but this does not always take the form of combat. Some orks are happy taking the war you know over the maybe-war-maybe-4dnonlineargo you don't.
Which is to say, in the grim darkness of the far future there is only war. Orks can enjoy anywhere.

>> No.34460388

>>34460134

The moon (Luna) is gun. No, not A gun. It's GUN, the essence of all things shooty, a personification of the concept of projectile weapons.

Shit, just getting past Saturn and the =I=, the Solar Fleet, and the panoply of FUCK YOU weapons to GET to Luna, let alone fighting your way past the rest of the fleet, Luna itself, and the orbital plates to make planetfall at Terra is a shot in a trillion.

>> No.34460394
File: 2.33 MB, 1239x903, Black Crusades.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34460394

>>34460224
>>34460224
Actually, he inflicted massive damage and weakened the defenses of the Imperium around the Eye and gate. Also gathered information, resources, and support needed for the 13th crusade.

Also the previous crusades weren't about taking Cadia.

>Billions of casualties is something the IG can absorb without undue trouble.

Not for the maddened bureaucracy that is the Imperium.

>> No.34460398

>>34460394
>retcons and retcrons

>> No.34460528

>>34460394
Apparently the 5th Black Crusade went through Fenris. That must have been interesting.

Also, most of these I just think of as "if we try enough we'll go in the right direction eventually!"

>> No.34460547
File: 171 KB, 694x880, Tuska's Oath.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34460547

>>34460326
>Warboss Tuska knew damn well what he was doing when he launched a WAAAAGH into the warp.

I meant it took a chance encounter with a daemon to plant the idea in his head.

It should have gone without saying that daemonkind is an enemy most suited to give the Orks the thrilling conflict they always desired.

>> No.34460587

>>34447230
Excuse me Commissar, but if we aren't allowed to improve our technology because that would be tech heresy, then why won't we create new STC from existing ones? The Sicaran Battle Tank of Great Crusade and Horus Heresy era was made out of elements from Land Rider and Rhino STC. Not only the Magos of those times tinkered with that, but also Lords Guilliman and Manus.

Thus the question is Lord Commissar...why can't we have new awesome STC this way? It's definitively not Tech Heresy.

>> No.34460609

>>34456157
>>>/g/
>>>/e/
>>>/t/

>>>/t/
>>>/h/
>>>/e/

>>>/f/
>>>/u/
>>>/ck/

>>>/out/

>> No.34460619

>>34460251
There was a short story about a Waagh into the Eye of terror.

I can't find it right now so I'll just paraphrase from my memory:

Random Ork boss is bored since he doesn't have challenging enemies and he hears about the Eye of terror and sends his mob that way, looking for a good fight.

The orks destroyed everything on their path. Garden of Slaanesh, filled with unimaginable pleasures and horrors? Orks shot everything there and burned it to ashes. World of wondrous crystals dedicated to magic of Tzeench? Orks smashed everything.

...At some point they landed on some rather boring looking desert world but after wandering around for a while without finding anything they shoot the ground out of boredom. The ground bleeds...

Soon they are fighting against Khornite demons without numbers. Not only is this a rather good fight but the demons actually manage to win. The last surviving ork is the Ork warboss and as the Daemon prince ruling over the world tries to teabag him or something the warboss uses his remaining strength to lift his power-claw and close the jaws around the daemons nether regions... (The tea-bagging wasn't mentioned, merely implied but the rest was there.)

Next morning the orks wake up alive and well on the planet and the daemons attack again. The same thing happens the day after that and the day after that.

As far as the orks are concidered they are in paradise as they get to fight incredibly tough enemies and are reborn every morning to fight again and again.

>> No.34460627

>>34460619
DAEMON KILLA!!!

>> No.34460650

>>34447230

Excuse me Commissar, but do you think the Retrojets or the Eternal Wills are going to win the Segmentum stregball championship? I know the retrojets have the better stats in almost all areas, but they play in a .8g environment most of the time, they won't be able to hit the ball nearly as hard in Terra standard grav.


Who are you betting on, sir?

>> No.34460656

>>34460547

It's mostly implied they were made to fight daemons, really.
The general fluff implication is that the ork race as a whole is a biological weapon created as a last ditch effort in the war in heaven, during the enslaver plague. If that's still canon, at least.
So they only exist to batter back the (then newly-created) warp.

Why they don't do it all the time now? I guess most are just uninformed. It's not like news travels fast or many orks are in a hurry to go fightin' cross the galaxy when there's plenty good fightin's two systems over. Or right here.

WAAAAGHs move as the warboss decides, and in general, I would suppose not many ork warbosses know about the eye of terror or the potential joy of fighting daemons. They're too busy fighting everyone else.

>> No.34460678

>>34460609
>>>/h/
>>>/o/
>>>/r/
>>>/s/
>>>/e/
>>>/co/
>>>/ck/

>> No.34460708

Abadons crusades in a nutshell

>theres this huge kid who lives in a house down the street
>every day he kicks you in the balls and steals some of your candy
>he keeps saying "on day 13 im really going to fuck you up man"
>you considered egging his house but its scary as shit and he has a big dog
>after he kicks you in the nuts and makes you generally feel like a bitch you go to school and tell everyone "He didnt do anything man, I totally held him off"

>> No.34460777

>>34460656
>980.M41 The Riftwaaagh!

>A new Warp anomaly blooms like a rancid flower in the Kantarak sector. Though the rift itself is small, the powerful emanations agitate indigenous greenskin populations throughout the sector. Driven wild, they launch Waaagh! after Waaagh! until Kantarak is reduced to war torn ruins.

Warp disturbances do indeed push their Waaaaagh! buttons

>> No.34460782

>>34460587
The Mechanicus does this...but keeps it all for itself. No awesome STC for you!!

>> No.34460794

>>34460656
Pretty much this. Most orks know jack shit about Chaos or the Warp, save the ones that know "them spiky humies" are a mean fight, let alone have any awareness of the galactic map.

>> No.34460997
File: 300 KB, 1280x990, horsecock.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34460997

>>34460678

>> No.34461738

>>34460194
I want my copy now. Can't wait.

>> No.34461849

>>34452317
This. The Ultras and DAngels are pretty much just as bad.

>> No.34461941

>>34460587
because this happens all the time
See vanquisher cannon for example there are 4 different varieties all based off the original stc that got lost forever ago

>> No.34462091

>>34461849
>The Ultras are pretty much just as bad.
Why? They don't control their successors any more than the Blood Angels do.

>> No.34462126

>>34460271
Don't forget angsting about his glorius gene-sire Horus, and flashbacks to Horus angsting about the Emperor!

>> No.34462175

>>34462091
Now THAT was bad.

>> No.34462195

>>34462175
Hm?

>> No.34462298

>>34462091
DA don't "control" their successor, they simply coordinate with them in secret.

Ultras, however, do it more openly, holding conclaves with successor chapter around Ultramar. Hell, some have even sworn loyalty to the chapter master of the Ultras. Not to forget that Ultras control 8 systems instead of a single world, got the Ultramar auxilia AND Ultramar defense fleet on top of their own troops and fleets...

And all because they've been extra nice. Remember who else was extra nice? Horus.

>> No.34462367

>>34448395
>4. They don't dick around, if for some reason they decided to turn traitor, they would send every warrior they have straight to the Golden Throne. High chance of them destroying it.

Pfft, no. They'd never get past the fleet, let alone the custodian guard.

>> No.34462371

>>34462298
>DA don't "control" their successor

Yes they do, it is why Az is Supreme Grand Master.

>Ultras, however, do it more openly

They do not. They don't hold big meeting, or instruct people what to do. They are simply very well respected.

>> No.34462455

>>34449345

Exposure to Warp Energy.

>> No.34462470

>>34462298
>DA don't "control" their successor
Yes, they do. They have secret meetings in which Azrael tells them what to do; they also did a big no-no and joined all their successors into one big fleet at one point, I forget when.

>> No.34462494

>>34455545
Hydra dominatus, brother!

>> No.34462530

>>34462195
Blood angels order all their successor chapters to return to Baal to replenish their numbers since they can't recruit more dudes for some odd reason

Good number of chapters didn't even show up, they get lynched and basically made outcasts.

Flesh Tearers told them to fuck off

Then Fabius Bile popped in and wrecked everyone's shit.

That's why it was bad

>> No.34462574

>>34462494
The Alpha Legions still doing their thing

>> No.34462613

>>34447465
>Even more troublesome: in the eldar language
>Filthy mon'keigh being able to grasp the majesty of Eldar language

laughingeldarwarlocks.jpg

>> No.34462666

>>34449219
>>34449240

Cultist-chan is also a very bad cultist.
Especially considering she's still Chaos Undivided.

>> No.34462690

>>34460650
The Retrojets have a good forward line, but Eternal Wills have a good deal of momentum from their recent victories. The old Terran Strength might just win this one, but as for bets, I've never really been a gambling man.

Better question, Guardsman: why are you talking to me instead of watching the damn field?

>> No.34462777

>>34462530
James Swallow can swallow my nads, I'm talking about the Darkest Hour.

>> No.34462980

>>34460394
Sure, Cadia hasn't been the target of most of the crusades. Its just the gigantic superfortress the empire depends on to block the one reliable bottleneck leading into the eye of terror. Pretty much every single crusade has hit Cadia, if only to try and bypass the place. And for all the damage Abby's little tempertantrums have done, pretty much all of it has been replaced/repaired by the time the next crusade comes around, making all the past crusades futile and ultimatetly pointless.
You'd think Abby would have wised up to the empires defensive strategy and just turned the planet into a debrisfield along with everything on it instead of wasting most of his fighting strength trying to storm the same place over and over again.

>> No.34463005
File: 53 KB, 591x73, gambling primer.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34463005

>>34460650
>betting on
>betting
I swear, they get stupider every year.

Report for a flogging, guardsman.

>> No.34463026

>>34462371
>>34462470
>"Although autonomous, Successor Chapters naturally claimed close ties to their originating Legion, and this proved especially true with the Dark Angels."
>"The Unforgiven coordinate their actions, and it is not unknown for the Supreme Grand Masters of all the Chapters to gather for summit meetings on the Rock."

To me it all sounds like the chapter masters convene and coordinate their efforts and exchange information and tactics, not that Azrael just calls a successor chapter up and tells them to do shit, because he has the captain's hat and you don't.

>> No.34463036

>>34463005
Blame the imperial education system.

>> No.34463139

>>34463026
>Azrael just calls a successor chapter up and tells them to do shit, because he has the captain's hat and you don't
He does literally just that.

>> No.34463163
File: 264 KB, 864x611, commissar execution.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34463163

>>34447230
>Excuse me, Commissar, but how is Abbadon-

>> No.34463219

>>34463139
Well clearly you have a quote stating just that, so lets have it.

>> No.34463297

>>34462666
>implying chaos undivided is not best chaos
avast, plebeian

>> No.34463346

>>34462613
>implying the Zathrases aren't already among you

laughingzathrases.png

>> No.34463353
File: 175 KB, 1048x470, unfaithful-question.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
34463353

>>34447230

>> No.34463443

>>34463219
Read the fucking codex, buddy.

>> No.34463476

>>34463353


But sir, I was just going to ask how hot you wanted that cyna bun.

>> No.34463551

>>34463443
Which one, pal? This here's a fluff-scussion, you'll have to be more specific. THUS THE REQUEST FOR QUOTATION.

>> No.34463612

>>34462613
Dude. Why are the Eldar laughing at mankind when they are the biggest failure to ever live? Seriously, the orks worked perfectly, but the Eldar sucked so hard the Necrons went to sleep and the Eldar still could not beat them. Then they partied themselves to death while telling themselves they are awesome for squatting in the ruins of the race that created them. Eldar fail. On every level.

>> No.34463646

>>34463551
The most recent one!

>> No.34463716

>>34463443
Those quotes are from the fucking codex, "buddy". Maybe you should go and look for that info yourself, because I can't find it.

>> No.34463822

>>34463646
SO. QUOTE. IT.

>> No.34463992

>>34463612
>They partied themselves to death while telling themselves they are awesome for squatting in the ruins of the race that created them.

.......guys, I wanna start an Eldar army now....

>> No.34464225

>>34463992
Dark (stall partying!) or Craftworld (ninja Vulcans!)?

>> No.34464412

>>34463992
I would rather divide them as Dark versus Hungover Eldar

>>
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