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33552908 No.33552908 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

What kind of questions would a non-human ask to a human?
>Do you feel your organs and stuff sloshing around in you all the time?

>> No.33552985

>>33552908
>Do you really have to think about mating ALL THE TIME? At least learn to suppress your psychic emanations, god damn

>> No.33553012

>>33552985
> Are you thinking of mating with me right now? That's disgusting.

>> No.33553059

>So let me get this straight. You have to constantly consume lower carbon-forms, perform a continuous gas exchange, AND you spend a third of your life unconscious? How you humans manage to accomplish anything is beyond me.

>> No.33553066

>How do you eat meat with only those four tiny canines?

>> No.33553077

>>So why do all you humans remove all your fur except for a patch on top of your head? Wait, it grows that way naturally?! Gross!

>> No.33553116

>What's the deal with airplane food?

>> No.33553139

>>33553012
>Ara ara, wanting to mate with a creature like me...how perverse.

>> No.33553157

>>33553139
> But that m-might be interesting, for the sake of science.

>> No.33553203

>>33552908
>How the fuck do you even fly?

>> No.33553317

>>33552908

Do you really only use 10% of your brain? We have cybernetic implants that can help you with that.

>> No.33553332

>>33553317
> Still believing humans only use 10% of their brain.
Anon, I...

>> No.33553366

>>33553332

>I [read] it on the Noosphere. Is it true that your own information network is composed almost entirely of pictures of felines?

>> No.33553380
File: 54 KB, 425x600, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553380

>>33553332
>look at this pleb who doesn't realise the soul is weighed down by gravity

>> No.33553399

>>33553366
Oh damn. Can you imagine the day you introduce aliens to websites like youporn or motherless. And then you add "So yeah, that's like 90% of our Internet traffic. Most of the 10% left is cat pictures and videos."

>> No.33553427

>Just watched this new Planet of the Apes movie
>Why is there an ape faction pretending they aren't apes?

>> No.33553430
File: 53 KB, 600x768, DEEP__crystal_creature_adult_by_firesprite.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553430

>Being based on carbon
>In the first cycle of period 24 for spiral arm III
>I shiggy diggy, human

>> No.33553432

>What possess someone to take a processed meat product made of wholly grotesque parts of an animal, and then shape it into a tubular shape?
>More importantly, how did such an abomination of protein become so outrageously popular?
>What possesses ANYONE to take this disgusting cylinder of "meat," dip it into a batter wholly void of nutritional value, cook it in such a way as to add useless saturated fats, pierce the monstrosity with a stick and sell it?
>Is it human nature to eat garbage?

>> No.33553460

>>33553317
>You only use 10% of your brain
>At one time

>And 100% over all cause duh

>> No.33553474

>>33553317
We DO occasionally use 100% of it at once. It's called a seizure.

>> No.33553514
File: 2.46 MB, 3333x2000, url.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553514

>>33553432

Forgot my image.

>> No.33553522

>>33553317
You are one stupid, stupid anon.

>> No.33553537

Better question, what would you ask a non-human

>> No.33553581
File: 41 KB, 392x594, pepper.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553581

>Wait, you willingly eat foods that activate your pain receptors?

>> No.33553587

>>33553537
It depends on the non-human

>> No.33553590

>>33553537
>Wanna fuck?

>> No.33553591

>>33553522
He can't help it.

He is only using 10% of his brain, after all.

>> No.33553602

>>33553581
>Wait you willingly launched nuclear warheads at your own planet?

>> No.33553604
File: 4 KB, 309x196, 1405797873930.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553604

>>33553317
>All these movies and games about "Pushing the brain to 100%!!"
>None of them ending at the five minute mark when the main character collapses in a shitting, pissing, flailing, moaning, vomitting mess.

>> No.33553608

>>33553537
Is it cute and feminine? I'll have to ask about reproduction first.

>> No.33553618

>>33553537
Do those produce milk?

>> No.33553622

>>33553602
And we fought the first might burn the whole atmosphere and kill us all, but we did it anyway!

>> No.33553623
File: 24 KB, 334x370, 1320640228850.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553623

>>33553591

>> No.33553639

>>33553622
This is why I don't think we will get contacted by aliens, from an outside prospective we probably look like a bunch of fucking lunatics who don't understand the difference between a good and bad idea

>> No.33553646
File: 535 KB, 1080x920, want.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553646

>>33553590
>>33553608

>> No.33553684

>Where's your tail? How do you keep balance on only two legs without it?

>> No.33553691

>>33553646
>animals
And then the entire human race was wiped out when USA, Russia, Best Korea, and half the middle east tried to blow them to bits

>> No.33553695
File: 28 KB, 335x333, 1393108510123.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553695

>>33553646
> mfw they will do it anyway because human/saiyan offspring is stronger than pure saiyan.

>> No.33553698

>>33553639
I really don't think one can make a starfaring civilization without trying a few ideas that look batshit insane at the first glance.

>> No.33553702
File: 1.47 MB, 300x225, Quark+irradiated+their+own+planet.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553702

>>33553602

>> No.33553713

>>33553698
Yes but the thing is, we keep doing them, again and again, until we run out of money to do them

>> No.33553725

>>33553713
Until there is another race to compare to, I'm gonna assume it is equally likely other races are just as crazy.

>> No.33553726
File: 441 KB, 1200x900, 1404591709519.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553726

>>33553695
Oh, you know they will. Over and over and over.

>> No.33553729

>Your visible spectrum is only from 390 to 700 nm?
>Do you ferment?
>Why do you use sexagesimal number system to measure time and geographic coordinates, when you otherwise count in base 10?
>What is an ounce?

>> No.33553733

>>33553713
And moreover, diverting funds AWAY from actually getting into space.

>> No.33553737

>>33553729
>What's a meter? Why not use the more standardized Q'lzot?

>> No.33553740

>>33553639
There's three ways to do things, the right way, the wrong way and the human way!
It's the wrong way but faster

>> No.33553748

>>33553726
Death by snu-snu.

>> No.33553750

>>33553733
>what took your race so long getting into space
>we were busy blowing each other to shit with highly dangerous materials that will leave lasting effects on our planet
>...

>> No.33553767

>>33553740
When you find yourself doing the wrong thing you don't stop doing it, you keep doing it until it turns out right

>> No.33553768

>>33553750
>And refining our planetary feline-related media and pornography network, of course.

>> No.33553787

>>33553726
Sauce.

>> No.33553805
File: 210 KB, 829x1169, fusee2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553805

>>33553750
> > So hey uh, do you happen to have technology that'd be capable of repairing a planet's ecology and bring dead species back to life? Hypothetically. We don't really need it, Earth is a pristine jewel and all.

>>33553767
If you have one chance in a million to succeed, you should fail as fast as possible 999999 times.

>> No.33553813

>>33553317
>>33553332
>>33553366
>>33553460
>>33553474
I think the 10% thing isn't surface area but processing power. They way I look at it we have the ability to use 100% of the surface area and an unknowable - as of right now - ability to use "processing power" if you will.

>> No.33553819

>>33553813
> The way I look at it.
You're dumb.

>> No.33553850

>>33553805
>implying we would take help from dirty xeno scum
Never admit you made the wrong decision

>> No.33553858

>>33553819
bro I'm a neuroscientist bro

>> No.33553885

>>33553858
And I'm your mom. Off to bed Anon.

>> No.33553889

>>33553858
Well then you are a dumb neuroscientist

>> No.33553898

>>33553858
And I am Kim Jong-un

>> No.33553926

>>33552908

>Why do so many humans like reality tv?

>> No.33553933

>>33553059

We don't technically /have to/ consume meat (we can get its nutrients from other sources both natural and synthesized), but it's just way more convenient and much cheaper to eat lower lifeforms.

>> No.33553953

>>33553116
>Sirius B Seinfeld.jpeg

>> No.33553960
File: 42 KB, 800x450, doubt.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33553960

>>33553787
>not recognizing dragon ball Z
No. Just no. I'm going to believe you are trolling or underage b&. I refuse to believe there are people older than 18 who have not heard of DBZ.

>> No.33553971

>>33553933
> cheaper
Not in water, Anon.
Unless you're talking strictly about chicken and insects. Beef meat is horribly inefficient. And yet so delicious, I'll never give it up.

>>33553960
I believe he's asking for the source of that particular image, you nitwit.

>> No.33553972

>>33553960
He wants the rest of the smut you idiot.

>> No.33553978

>>33553813

I think the 10% thing isn't processing power, but saltiness. The way I look at it, our brains can get 100% salty, but we don't know how yet, and there's no way of detecting it.

I'm currently developing a magic system based on saltiness. I'm convinced it will mirror the real-world applications of our eventual discoveries in the fields of brain salt.

>> No.33553982

>>33553960
Yes because in DBZ two female saiyans raped Yamcha.

>> No.33554004

>What does hunger feel like?

>> No.33554010

>>33553805
But, as the old saying goes, million to one chances crop up nine times out of ten.

>Alternatively

Our chance of success isn't zero, as close as it may be. And for us, that makes it a hundred percent chance.

>>33553960
I know it's based on DBZ. I'm asking for the source for that particular piece of fan art. Sorry if I caused a misunderstanding.

>> No.33554013
File: 135 KB, 840x1018, delf.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33554013

>What does "consent" mean?
>What is a "safe word"?
>What is "mercy"?

>> No.33554017

>>33554013
>doesn't know the meaning of mercy
And then they were blown to hell and back

>> No.33554019
File: 131 KB, 428x271, tg stop it psion.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33554019

>>33553012
>stop it xeno

>> No.33554035

>>33554013
Why are aliens always so edgy?

>> No.33554042

>>33554010
>>33553787
Looks like they all come from this artist: http://funsexydragonball.tumblr.com/

>> No.33554049

>So you spend long periods of your life watching these "movies", and reading these "books"
>And a lot of these are not based on the truth, to the point where they are entirely fabricated.
>Why would you willingly spend time lying to yourself?

>> No.33554059

>>33553813
>>33553978

The "10% thing" is that only about 1 in 10 neurons are firing at once.

Because if more than that is firing at once, you're having a tonic–clonic seizure.

>> No.33554071

>>33554049
> What are those short movies for? Why aren't these humans wearing clothes? And why are your hand going down to your legs?

>> No.33554103

Why is it in these threads people tend to write questions as if the alien perspective they were portraying is more "enlightened" than humans? Which in this case somehow means a near robotic adherence to rationality and a lack of emotional compulsions or reproductive drive.

>> No.33554108

>>33554071
So in summary you created a network that connect nearly all of your planet and make you able to learn about nearly everything and talk with nearly everyone but you mostly use it to watch other people mating?

>> No.33554113

>>33554103
Because it's funny.

>> No.33554115

>>33554071
>What are you doing? It looks interesting! Can I help?

I love how this thread keeps coming back to this.

>> No.33554137

>>33554113
It's boring after the first few posts that end up as some variation of either "I don't understand why sex is a big deal for humans" or "silly humans you fuck up everything with bombs and war".

>> No.33554147

>>33554137
Oh, and the repetition of "the internet is filled with inane things". I clicked the thread cause the question about whether or not we could feel internal organs sloshing around was actually a bit new and funny.

>> No.33554157

>>33554137
>>33554147
Mostly because there aren't aliens to ask the questions they'd ask, Anon. So it's 4chan asking the questions.

>> No.33554158
File: 49 KB, 226x387, fun police.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33554158

>>33554137
Instead of complaining you could write a post you think is better.

>> No.33554165

>human alien contact has been made
>meeting is set up so that they may speak in person
>humans spend entire meeting thinking about fucking them
>aliens are mind readers
>they make this known
>this only adds more fuel to the mental fuck train

>> No.33554176

>>33553399
the internet 100% pussy

>> No.33554208

>Is it true that some humans find sexual pleasure in defecating on each other?

>> No.33554212
File: 26 KB, 337x302, Bullseye-Plumbing-Toilet-Image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33554212

>Why do you have an holy room in your lair for cleansing your body? And why do you have a throne for ridding yourself of waste with a holy book on it? Couldn't you do that anywhere else in here? It seems strange to read and engage in prayer while maintaining your bodily functions. And what exactly is this "Chicken Soup for the Soul"?

>> No.33554222

>>33554212
Oh, that's a good one.

>> No.33554225

why are aliens are completely retarded and can't understand basic biology?

fuck this HFY shit

>> No.33554241

>>33554225
Maybe they are made entirely of gases and therefore don't even understand the concept of biology?

>> No.33554258

>>33554165
>> My feet hurt.
>> The alien talks too loudly.
>> I wish I was home playing video games.
>> Wonder how far I could it with my waifu in that one VN.
>> I'm hungry.
>> Wonder how hot the alien is without all these clothes.
>> This seat is comfy.
>> I hope their sense of smell isn't as good as ours.
>> Why are long boring speeches always so long and boring.
>> Eh, that cat video *was* funny.
>> Wait, they can read thought, can't they. Oh god, think nice things.
>> The alien is cute, the alien is nice, I like the alien.
>> Wonder how hot-fuck no, fuck.
>> Oh god.
>> PINK UNICORN PINK UNICORN PINK UNICORN.
>> 1x2 2, 2x2 4, 3x2 6, 5x2 10.
>> Wait shit I skipped 4x2, now they'll think we're dumb.

>> No.33554265

>>33553399
The vast majority of internet content is actually advertising, contrary to the common belief.

>You use this gigantic information array as a mere bazaar? Truly your greed knows no limits.

>> No.33554298

>>33554222
>Is there a reason you have domesticated beasts in your residence and you do not eat them?
Companionship, mostly.
>Isn't that why you communicate with your kin and other humans?
Um.... Not all of us humans are great with talking and such.
>That must make it difficult for many things! Bartering for your supplies, having a reliable source of comfort, not to mention finding a suitable mate!
Don't remind me....

>> No.33554315

>>33554258
>tfw I believe in mind readers
>tfw I constantly count out numbers in my head
>2 4 8 16 32 64 128

>> No.33554318

>>33554298
>the alien version of the question "Why are you such a NEET" is roundabout yet naively sincere
It hurts

>> No.33554336

>>33554315
Oh, you too?
I do that pretty much all the time. Or sing some children song.

>> No.33554368

>>33554336
If I have something wooden on hand I'll just rub my fingers all over it and concentrate on the minute details, yes that looks as weird as it sounds

>> No.33554376

>Why do you fear keep wiping out our insect and arachnid cousins yet pour a disproportionate amount of resources into protecting a self insufficient ball of fur and fat, and another animal known for committing repeated rape?

>Male, where is the queen, and why aren't you impregnating her right now? That is your only purpose, correct?

>Why don't your leaders simply control you with pheremones instead of letting you think for yourselves oh god my life is a lie accept me into your hive.

>> No.33554395

>>33554376
>accept me into your hive
WITH PLEASURE

>> No.33554397

>>33554298
>What are these "Trojan Condoms"?
They go over the male's reproductive organs. It's to reduce the chance of pregnancy in women.
>That seems like the worst idea. Why would you want to prevent the thing that keeps your species alive?!
W-Well, not all humans want offspring. Humans engage in intercourse for pleasure-
>We do too! But reproduction without the actual reproduction seems pointless! .... How do these condoms work anyway?
Well, when a man's genitals are ready, he puts that on, then he takes it off after he's had an orgasm and released his seed.
>You ACTUALLY have members of your species who no only do not want offspring with reproduction, but also wear synthetic sleeves on your genitals and your females recieve them willingly?
Pretty much, yes.
>And to think I thought the throne of waste disposal and best companions was strange......

>> No.33554410

>>33554315
>>33554336
>>33554368
Anons, all the things you're describing are symptoms of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.

>> No.33554423

>>33554410
Huh, good to know

>> No.33554425

>Every single thing is "why do you do this thing that doesn't really make sense when you break it down to its constituent parts and ignore every single chemical, physical and emotional reaction you get from doing it"

They would be interested in what hunger feels like, or how people communicate without telepathy, or some crazy shit like that. Not "WHY YOU PUT PENIS IN VAGINA". Unless they are supposed to be developmentally retarded or something.

>> No.33554432

>>33554318
The reverse of that, playing a massive NEET alien in otherwise human party could be fun. They think that your race is weird when you're just a massive loser in reality.

>> No.33554440

>>33554425
What if everything on their planet reproduces asexually?

>> No.33554442

>>33554336
I always have SOME song stuck in my head on infinite loop. Even if mind readers existed, I doubt they could bear to listen for long.

>> No.33554456

>>33554318
>My..... 'sincerest apologies', human? I hope that's the right phrase.

>> No.33554464

>So your economic system give more money to people who hit well in a ball or entertain you than to people who try to find a cure against deadly diseases?

>> No.33554472

>>33554464
>curing diseases
>worth more than manual labor

>> No.33554474

>>33554440
Then their entire biomass was likely designed from scratch and they'll be dumbfounded by things bigger than our reproductive system.

>> No.33554488

>>33554442
>IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII'M
>HOOKED ON A FEELING
Alien ambassador immediately leaves Earth, says it will bring back warships to deal with the mindworm infestation that has obviously taken root. More at 11.

>> No.33554490

>>33554464
Why are all alien races we meet austere and utilitarian? Don't they put the same value on entertainment that we do?

>> No.33554495

>>33553432
>So I assume you haven´t heard that they also like to consuma a plethora of variou poisons and toxins..., FOR FUN!!!

>> No.33554496

>>33554440
Put yourself on the opposite side. Are you unable to comprehend that a species could reproduce asexually? Of course not. You just suggested it. So why would they be unable to comprehend of a species reproducing sexually? It's stupid. Unless, I said, these aliens are supposed to be incapable of basic understanding.

>> No.33554507

>>33554464
>No alien understands the concept of entertainment

Getting bored of this thread.

>> No.33554509

>>33554496
I said the entire planet for a reason anon, we have things on our planet the reproduce asexually so it isn't a foreign concept

>> No.33554520

>>33554496
That's dumb, Anon.
Asexual reproduction exists on our planet for some stuff. And it's easier to imagine missing something than imagine something that has never existed.

>> No.33554527

>>33554490
How do you think they came here in the first place? Football players don't build spaceship.

>> No.33554535

>>33554527
Maybe they do in secret

>> No.33554547

>>33554395
No, human males can still copulate with their heads on.

>I've always wondered why we evolved that.

>> No.33554549

An alien reading my mind would probably an Hero immediately.

>> No.33554550

>>33554527
Pfft, maybe *human* football players don't.

>> No.33554559

>>33554442

Fun fact: that also may run off some of the same mechanisms as OCD, as OCD meds tend to "cure" earworms.

>>33554507
>implying alien entertainment = human entertainment

They may consider us sticks in the mud for our relative lack of killing bloodsport, or because we're not hooked on feeds of our bitchin' X-ray telescopes.

>> No.33554561

>>33554527
Maybe their idea of fun is spaceship building.

>> No.33554563

>Do your fingernails and hair hurt when they grow?
>How can your eyes be so terrible in the dark, but precise enough to read tiny words on a piece of paper so fast?
>What is the point of "puberty"?

>> No.33554573

>>33554549
>hmm lets read anons mind
>DICKSDICKSDICKSDICKSILOVEDICKSDICKSDICKSBIGFUCKINGMEATYDICKS

>> No.33554577

>What is the function of a rubber duck?

>> No.33554580

>>33554549
Or you could get a date.

>> No.33554581

>>33554488
It'd be more like
>*Angry high-speed punk ranting for 15 seconds or so*
>NAZI PUNKS (x3) FUUCK OOOFFF!
>Repeat the above a couple of times
>Background is grungy fuzzed out guitar strumming power chords at high speed

Aliens would either kick me out of negotiations or become an hero.

>> No.33554634

>>33554581
>current earworm: Chemical Warfare

We're in trouble.

>> No.33554662

>tfw if the meeting had a long pause my mind would fill with an ungodly low drone that drives me fucking insane
I have a feeling I would be kicked out

>> No.33554666

>>33554634
Or worse: I Kill Children. Complete with Biafra's psycho-voice throughout.

>> No.33554701

>>33554662
> Who the hell are you? You're not the ambassador! Where is he? I have the right to know! What? A janitor outfit, you're sure? What's he doing here? I thought he was one of their soldiers.

>> No.33554704

>>33554559
Alien entertainment's never classy.

>As a gift to you, have this, a scented candle of our finest smell inscriptor, it is an epic of the trials and tribulations of our efforts to reach space.

>Here human, this cake is our summer bestseller story. It doesn't have many layers to it, but it does have excellent special ingredients in it. In order to experience additional dimension to the taste, you will need this here layer of film in between you and the tounge. I think it's a bit of a gimmick though. I don't need anything in the way of my taste of the slaughter and/or sexual conquest of all those humans.

>> No.33554716

>>33554701
y-you too

>> No.33554749

>>33554716
Come on Anon.
Being a janitor on a space station or some high class UN building is my dream job too.

>> No.33554752

>>33554049
So your aliens are Baudrillard?

>> No.33554778

>>33554749
I would much rather be a window washer

>> No.33554784

>>33554778
Ground level is as far as I'd go, so, that's out for me.

>> No.33554787

>>33552908
what the fuck are you supposed to be?

>> No.33554795

>>33554704
>aliens entertain themselves by crafting stories out of objects like food, matches, and other items that are consumed when used
>Turns out grandmama's potato salad recipe tells a tale of extreme heartbreak and misery that brings the alien ambassador to (the equivalent of) tears
>Shame it tastes so fucking good though

>> No.33554799

>>33553805
mon negre !

>> No.33554800

>>33554787
Shut the fuck up nothing

>> No.33554801

>Why are your bones on the inside? That's what food looks like. This is awkward.

>> No.33554842

>>33552908
How come males of your specias have these two protuberances in their chest, these... "Nippuls" did you call them? Only the females seems to have a use for those.

And why the fuck do they get hard and pointy in cold temperatures? You guys are fucking weird.

>> No.33554852

>meet a bacteria-colony intelligent life form
>human breath oxygen
>drink alcohol

>> No.33554864

>>33554842
Well you have 6 eyes and you seem to use your ears as your primary information gathers, fuck you alien shit

>> No.33554920

>>33554864
But those organs of mine have a clear function and don't alter their shape with temperature.

Also, my organs can't freeze and fall off.

Please respond.

>> No.33554921

>>33552908
>What is this "fun" you're so obsessed with?

>> No.33554923

>>33554852
So THAT'S where Space!Rum comes from.

>> No.33554931

>>33554315
What's up Atton Rand, do you play pazaak too?

>> No.33554943

>>33554577
>>What is the function of a rubber duck?
i´ve allways wondered this

>> No.33554969

>>33554943
Go away Arthur.

>> No.33555024

>>33554943
It reminds the hominids of infants of their species while being shaped as the species of another in order to reduce societal pressures upon interacting with a child-substitute.

(Seriously, big eyes, small mouth, cow-lick hairstyle, rubber duckies are "Cute" and are at the coarsest level similar to newborns, which as humans we inherently protect and interact with.)

>> No.33555025

>>33554920
At least I don't look like a fucking weirdo
Checkmate alien

>> No.33555056

>>33555025
The xeno storms out the room, crying those silly crocodile tears xenos always cry.

>> No.33555070

>>33555024
…that explains Disney.

>> No.33555071

>>33555056
WOOOOOO HUMANS ARE NUMBER ONE WOOOOOO

>> No.33555141

>>33555071
As you run around in circle naked below the waist, you slam your dick in a table and take 1d cr damage.

>> No.33555209

>"What's that saying? 'Two humans, three opinions'? That must be very frustrating"

>> No.33555224

>>33553432
No, it's called taste buds, an evolutionary adaptation so that we would actually eat once in a while.

It tastes good because thanks to our non-technological forefathers were born into very active lifestyles and fats are very attractive to the body, making them "taste better" for us.

I pity you alien, for your reason to live is truly that, alien. What is life if not pointless if one can not taste food?

>> No.33555240

>>33555224
If you actually valued your sense of taste, you wouldn't eat shit like that.

>> No.33555284

>>33553639
Oh please, as if aliens would somehow have the moral high ground. No really, why is this a popular thing to think aliens are? Are the otherkin so fucking retarded that they await the big grays hoping they will remove "da buwwies."?

No really, it pisses me off so much to see "Durr aliens haven't contacted us because we are such uniquely evil" on what basis you faggot? Hell, the fact that they probably have FTL tech would imply they probably risked their planets a whole lot.

No, they simply haven't contacted us because there are no space faring civ yet, we're the first ones and if anything we'll be the precursors, a thousand coin tosses does not imply that one will stand on the edge rather than fall on the side and all that.

>> No.33555336

>>33555284
>this entire post

>> No.33555384

>>33555284

the thing that depresses me most is that FTL could be impossible. our best ideas require exotic matter that may not even exist.

>> No.33555389

>>33555284
> there are no space faring civ
> mfw people always drone on about how big the universe is and that there HAS to be some spacefaring civilization somewhere and they always forget the universe is 13+ billions years old and will last for eons.

>> No.33555415

>>33555389
>infinite universe
>everything that can exist does exist an infinite number of times

>> No.33555575

>>33553750
>Yet you didn't go to space human in the first moment you used a nuclear device?
>Yeah I know we s- wait what?
>Human, how can it come that when every race killed half of it's populations disgusting different "races" you didn't realise that the painful death cries are what fuels the modern FTL engine?
>Wait what, what about bending space through science and technology? I mean holy fuck what? I- I mean when we did kill all of those people we got really sad that we d-
>You got sad over the death of others? such weakness. Human, don't you know that those "morals" of yours are chaining down your society? One should be able to kill and rape at will and only those that can defend themselves are the ones worthy of living free.

What a twist, fuck you. Why are there always one race of aliens? They are all racists. Why do they ask such stupid questions about love? They have no actual social comfort and are all psychopaths sociopaths that are forced to like each other.

>> No.33555608

>>33555575
>that race you described
>being able to make it to space
no

>> No.33555629

>>33555575
>Human, how can it come that when every race killed half of it's populations disgusting different "races" you didn't realise that the painful death cries are what fuels the modern FTL engine?
AZTEC WERE RIGHT

>> No.33555644

>>33554315

I tend to count another powers of 2 in order to prevent premature ejaculating. It doesn't help itself, but when I invariably make a mistake circa 131072 I get so annoyed it draws my mind off -things-

>> No.33555674

>"No offence, but how do I tell males and females apart?"

>"What are your religions like? Do you have religions?"

>"I want to try some human cuisine while I'm here, what would you recommend?"

>> No.33555681

>>33555240
I've never eaten it but i'm guessing the fact that it's popular is because it tastes good. The same goes for everything else. Also honor in taste is only for retarded chefs and "connoisséurs" who either think "Slap as much high costs blends between two different taste, sweet and salty, sour and bland together" or because they want to feel special about it.

Now I don't fucking know if that thing tastes like shit but I know two things about why people eat "bad foods": It actually tastes good for the body (mind you the body is retarded) or it's filled with a harmless chemical that makes it taste good. Either way, there is no shame or honor in food, just adding that because it's not the first time i've heard something so retarded.

>> No.33555690
File: 43 KB, 640x480, db4-02.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33555690

>>33555674
>"No offence, but how do I tell males and females apart?"

>> No.33555794

>>33555608
Yet we are making it towards space, are you implying that *Gasp* we are not actually bombing our entire species to hell, ruining our planet and actually figuring out how FTL would work?

I mean yes I basically just described them as evil and reversed from what you wrote but it's not like what we did wasn't done with the thought "Oh god, millions of lives just went to waste." I mean for fucks sake one of the scientist working on the bomb that blew up hiroshima went of to eat the bullet. nearly everyone felt bad about doing it.

We humans are really fucking empathic, and while it's easy to hide that behind making the enemy a big blob of one or two evil dictators forming an entire nation or dehumanizing the other side through propaganda and defacing there's no denying that people that are at least close to normal are afraid of killing people, because it feels wrong, sure it's easier to do it when you can't see them but honestly if you aren't completely fucked up in the head you are gonna be sleepless when you hear the death toll if you ever did something like that.

>> No.33555849

>>33555794
Good and bad is something we are taught, don't act like human beings innately feel bad if they kill someone else

>> No.33555902

>>33555071
To quote farscape, 'humans are superior'

>> No.33555950

>>33555794
Remember how few military bullets are shot to actually hit another human being.

>> No.33556033

>>33555849
But they do, that's the whole point of being a social species. Empathy wasn't a thing some old moldy man came up with when he felt he was tired of being pissed on.

Sure, conflict and other horrors can dampen and make us forget or make us push away it, like if you are living alone in the wilderness and is constantly hunted, but that's because that is literally insanity, forgetting human socialization through isolation basically makes you insane much like boredom and lack of using your brain makes you dumber so does the lack of being a normal human being.

Yes, it's thought but a human with a mature social understanding and no general defects won't exactly feel nice about hurting other people. Also no shit a lot is thought from parent to child, a lot of things are. It's just that being a social species wasn't exactly a fucking choice. It's just good and bad are labels for what we should call the feelings we get.

So yes, I will act like a human being feels bad about killing another because if it wasn't we wouldn't be the god damned humans we are today , our society didn't just fucking poof out of nowhere with all these concepts of what is good or bad, the muslims didn't say "Don't enslave another muslim" without actually feeling that enslaving another relatable human being is bad. Rome wouldn't give any respect or actual chance of going free if they didn't think "Hmmm, slaves are important but then again they also cry every fucking night". Guess why actual death sentences are so fucking rare? Because while the prisoners are faceless figures labeled "EVIL" with big black words there's still some understanding that they are humans and we feel bad about doing it because in today's world it's really easy to get info and a face on every human.

You know what makes humans evil? You know what makes the whole street killings and shit possible? Constant reinforcement about the idea is good and necessary, social enforcement and dehumanizing.

>> No.33556035

>>33555794
lol we ain't making it to space. If you've been paying attention, in 30 years there will be almost no space flight, even for satellites.

>> No.33556157

>>33556035

The problem with that is there's this assumption that the private sector will fill the gap once governmental space programs back off. Unfortunately, that hasn't really been happening.

Plus the whole Challenger thing put a lot of people off the idea, which doesn't help.

>> No.33556176

>What the FUCK is that?
Uh...what, the candle?
>No! What's on it?!
...Fire?
>Are you insane!? This is an oxygen rich environment!

>> No.33556199

>>33556176
>20ish% oxygen
>oxygen rich

>> No.33556212

>>33553581
What are you, a pussy?

>> No.33556224

>>33556199
Hey, they might come from somewhere with very little oxygen. To them, 20% could be a lot.

>> No.33556272

>Have you heard the Gospel of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints?

>> No.33556312

>>33556224
Then why would they be worried about the flame? If the highest concentration of oxygen they have seen is near 20% then they shouldn't give two shit about it

>> No.33556341

>>33554423
Yeah, I'm OCD out the wazoo with doctor's certificates and everything and I used to do that kind of shit all the time. The worst one was having to take an equal amount of left-footed and right-footed steps throughout the day. It got super hard to keep track of as well as involved a lot of involuntary hopping.

>> No.33556382

>>33552908
>What kind of questions would a non-human ask to a human?
Nothing suspicious or they would figure out who we are. It's the people that don't ask odd questions you should fear.

>> No.33556404

>>33556382
Thats what a non human would say

>> No.33556437
File: 34 KB, 448x336, 80431042.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33556437

>>33556382
So all poll on internet are made by non-human?
I KNEW IT, THEY ARE EVERYWHERE!

>> No.33556473

>>33555794
I'm not sure how you're disagreeing with him. The race described DIDN'T feel bad about it. We do. We kill each other all the time but we still do have empathy.
> confusion intensifies

>> No.33556514

>>33556341
When I was in college I had a pathological fear of disease.

I was proud of the fact that I could, and still can, use the bathroom and wash my hands without my hands ever touching anything in the bathroom.

>> No.33556517

>>33555674
>Males are usually bigger than females, with a more "square" structure. Females are more curved, and don longer hair on their head. Also their chest have mammaries, which are basically sacks of fat.

>We have an incredible amount of religions, i suggest you ask either an ambassador or an historian for a more complete rundown of the religions through history

>Be sure to consult your doctors or biologists to see if our food is edible for you, we've evolved to be omnivours and our stomachs have very powerful acids that help digest food, and most of it contains toxins even after it's been cooked

>> No.33556518

>>33556312
Maybe their world had a low oxygen% but their ocean had a high one and they accidentally ignited it, traumatizing them as a species.

>> No.33556535

>>33556517
Long hair has historically been a symbol of masculinity, it only waned in the past 200 years.

>> No.33556561

>>33556312
If they lived in a methane-rich atmosphere oxygen could be very fucking dangerous for them. Remember, while methane is flammable you can't make fire without oxygen, but once the flame is alight the whole thing is going to blow

>> No.33556571

>>33555284
Imagine an intelligent alien species living on a planet that makes Australia look like a kiddie zoo. A planet where the dominant intelligent species had 2 million years to evolve advanced "neocortex" thinking instead of 200,000 years.

That species could be so incredibly more intelligent, pragmatic and above all logical, it's easy to imagine them realising the danger of nuclear weapon proliferation after just one nuclear test.

Not because they'd have a higher moral ground. But just because such an alien at the age of 3 could make Albert Einstein look like a retard.

>> No.33556581

>>33556535
>"how do i tell males and females apart these days, not centuries ago"

>> No.33556594

>>33556581
And then you show him tumblr

>> No.33556595

>>33556571
>a planet that makes Australia look like a kiddie zoo
I'm trying, i really am
I just can't

>> No.33556601

>>33556518
> species surviving the entirety of their world igniting
That's badass.

>> No.33556617

>>33554049
>>33554108

>Implying Aliens don't have movies, books or the internet.

>> No.33556619

>>33556272
>Marklar

>> No.33556623

>>33556571
>a species like that
>not wiping us out from orbit purely based on the fact that we might be a threat at some point

>> No.33556636

>>33556473
I'm disagreeing that humanity bombed itself because it is ignorant and evil enough to do it, that that is what hinders progress and science. It started as a small jab against the whole "Hyuman so ignorant, you nail god to wood unga bunga!" thing, that we are the only race to develop bombs and that somehow hindered science when it comes to space flight even though it's basically just been less than 100 years since then.

But I also just wanted to talk about how everyone is retarded for thinking a normal, sane human being is somehow not empathic and caring.

>> No.33556645

>>33553537

>Got any spare chunks of gold laying around? That stuff's mighty valuable down on Earth.

>> No.33556655

>>33556645
You can't say it's valuable on earth, because then they will sell it for themselves.

>> No.33556659

>>33556636
>But I also just wanted to talk about how everyone is retarded for thinking a normal, sane human being is somehow not empathic and caring.

This reminds me of the "Humans live in the veil of crazy " HFY, and it hurts.

>> No.33556669

>>33556623
A species like that could probably send a a kindergarten class to the Terran Galactic empire, and that kindergarten class would be able to wipe out the entire human species in days.

It'd be like sending Terminators after cavemen who just discovered fire.

>> No.33556670

>>33556571
How about we live on a planet like that,we just tamed it? Oh wait, we do!

>> No.33556690

>>33556670

Hah. Hah. Hah.

No.

>> No.33556694

>>33556595
Uuuuh, a planet that's chockful of metals in organic compounds? Filled with space-dinosaurs?

Imagine, an alien Tyrannosaur with biometal armour comparable to a modern MBT.

>> No.33556704

>>33556655

Sell it for what, whores?

What if caffeine is poisonous to an alien species, or has a different effect on them compared to the average Human.

What if aliens can't burp.

What I'm saying is it would be cool if our differences are in things that, at first glance, do not matter. It's silly to assume aliens don't have arts & sciences, just like it's silly to assume aliens don't know species have "holy" times around the equinoxes/solstices.

>> No.33556735

>>33556670
No. Because our evolution as humans just took 200,000 years.

The slower you transition from semi-intelligent species to intelligent species, the better.

Because you're still being pressured by evolution.

Why can we talk so much better than do math? Because the parts of our brain for speech are so much older than the parts of our brain for calculations.

Evolving intelligence is like pastry. The slower you let it bake, the better it gets.

>> No.33556742

>>33556659
What? That they have to constantly trick the aliens that they are evil supermonsters so they don't get bulldozed instantly?

>> No.33556748

>>33556670

You know what's sad?

The environments and creatures we're wiping out are more or less the ones that make Human life at the level we enjoy possible. When the last human dies, there will still be nature, and in time maybe another race will come up and take our place.

We're not cutting down the tree, we're cutting the branch we're sitting on.

>> No.33556765

>>33556735
>Evolving intelligence is like pastry. The slower you let it bake, the better it gets.

Unless you're an intelligent species that develops reliable gene modification, in which case it becomes a microwave.

>> No.33556771

>>33555690
>WOW, CAN U NOT? YOU ARE PERPETRATING THE OPPRESSION OF THE PATRIARCHY! DIE CIS SCUM!

>> No.33556794

>>33556765
Yeah. Sort of true. Developing genetic modification is great.

But you still have to use it.

>> No.33556809

>>33556704
Horses can't puke
Rats too

>> No.33556883
File: 244 KB, 512x342, 1385333946159.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33556883

>>33556748
This shit keeps me up at night man.

If we don't change the way we live, we'll have a mass extinction on our hands within 10,000 years.

A serious mass extinction - the kind that wipes out all life bigger than dogs.

Guess which current top-predator is bigger than dogs.

Mankind might never get older than 210,000 something years. That's fucking sad. You know why? That means we will hardly leave any fossils behind. A species that exists for 210,000 years is a fucking mayfly.

Aliens will land on Earth, discover chemical and radioactive signs of a long-dead civilization, and find evidence of steel and concrete structures that have long-since crumbled, but they won't find a single human fossil.

All those 210,000 years of human history, just forgotten. Not a single creature out there in the universe will ever remember Earth.

>> No.33556916

>>33553787
Plague of Gripes drew >>33553646

>> No.33556921

>>33556883
But you know what most people think "Who care, I will be dead then"

>> No.33556979

>>33553430
>I shiggy diggy, human
But that's all your species does.

>> No.33556986

>>33556921
>>33556883
Both of you need to go outside and turn off the Al Gore documentaries.

>> No.33556992

>>33556921
Those people are faggots.

>> No.33557001
File: 35 KB, 827x550, dawg.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33557001

>>33556748
Things can still be changed but it's going to take some effort. Hell I'm a right winger but I'm also totally in favour of preserving nature and sometimes it just annoys me to see my other right wings friends not give a single fuck about that shit.

>> No.33557023
File: 85 KB, 580x563, 1405919733745.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33557023

>tfw no alien gf

>> No.33557043
File: 194 KB, 428x237, 1403225972597.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33557043

>>33557001
>Right wing

>> No.33557046
File: 31 KB, 500x378, 2b3.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33557046

You know exactly what they'd think

>> No.33557083

Let's get some Aximili-Esgarrouth-Isthill all up in this bitch.

>The first thing an Andalite may notice about humans is that they walk around on only two legs. It is very strange to see so many creatures balancing that way. But, despite this, they seldom fall over.

>> No.33557085
File: 993 KB, 422x317, tfw.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33557085

>>33556883
>yfw Earth has steadily produced intelligent civilizations that have prospered before killing each other completely
>before us it was intelligent insects, then dinosaurs
>after us it'll be dolphins, magpies, elephants or octopuses
>the closest to space travel were the dinosaurs but the asteroid killed them
>they still would have killed themselves before reaching the space age

>> No.33557103

>>33557083

>You can breath while eating!
>Yeah? Well *you* can do that weird... Sound after eating!
>It's called burping
>Whatever it's called, it sounds horrible! Gas in your stomach? How dreadful.

>> No.33557115

>>33557083
>There are many dangers for an Andalite in human morph. For one thing, there is the constant danger that you will fall off your two legs. The slightest push and you can topple over. But worse by far is the danger of taste. Taste is the sense that can drive an Andalite mad! Especially if it involves cinnamon buns or chocolate.

>> No.33557127
File: 148 KB, 1346x1056, 140405380979.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33557127

>>33557085
I believe that's wrong.

>> No.33557144

>>33557115
>I have morphed some Andalite animals. And I have morphed many strange Earth animals. But the animal I morphed the most is the human animal. They are weak, slow, half-blind and unstable, but no Andalite should laugh at them. Humans rule their planet. And as the human Rachel once said, Earth is a tough neighborhood.

>> No.33557165

>>33557127
Personally, I like to imagine troodons as some form of tribal species with rudimentary crafting before they got wiped out.

>>33557115
A human has only two eyes. Both are on the front of the face. It is the same with most Earth species. These human eyes are very similar to our own main eyes. But humans seem fascinated by my stalk eyes. One of the humans, Marco, has said they "creep him out big time". I believe this is a compliment.

>> No.33557185

>>33553432
We are to other aliens what orks are to us..

>> No.33557191

>>33557165
Whoops, forgot a >
>An Andalite may think that humans are simple, open, trusting creatures. But they are more subtle than they seem to be at first. Possibly this is because of their spoken language, where no word ever means just one thing.

(For those who never read Animorphs, most alien species use telepathy.)

>> No.33557192

>Oh, you have two separate holes for eating and shitting? That sounds pretty handy, if you ask me. Shit.

>> No.33557213

>>33557191
>Books are an amazing human invention. They allow instant access to information simply by turning pieces of paper. They are much faster to use than computers. Surprisingly, humans invented books before computers. They do many things backwards.

>> No.33557226

>>33553813
http://news.msn.com/science-technology/humans-already-use-way-way-more-than-10-percent-of-their-brains-2

tl;dr version: the human brain is 100% active at all times and people who believe we only use 10% percent of our brains are idiots who cling to a theory that is muddy at best.

>> No.33557230

>>33557213
>Humans have very odd tastes. They think their music is beautiful. They are wrong. It is awful. All of it. And they completely ignore their greatest accomplishments: the cinnamon bun, the Snickers bar, the hot pepper and the refreshing beverage called vinegar.

>> No.33557245

>>33557192
Our males have a third hole for urine and semen. The females aren't so lucky...

>> No.33557268

>>33557230
>"E.T. phone home." When I found that sentence in Cassie's book of human quotes, it surprised me. To be honest, it almost scared me. I thought maybe, somehow, my human friends had discovered my plan and written it there.

(Other tidbit: Ax is basically a kid alien stranded on Earth.)

>> No.33557301

>>33557245
...Wait, you think women piss and fuck through their ass?

>>33557268
>It is very difficult to be in human morph and remember that you are not one of them. That their pain is not your pain. It is hard to remain apart. Sometimes very hard.

>> No.33557303

>>33557301
>...Wait, you think women piss and fuck through their ass?

They don't?

>> No.33557305

>>33552908
>Is it true that humans excrete their waste fluids both from their productive organ AND their skin when hot?

>> No.33557326

>>33557301
>"You can't always get what you want. But if you try sometimes, you just might find, you get what you need." A famous human named Rolling Stones said that. I thought it was very wise, for a human.

>> No.33557349 [DELETED] 

>>33557305
>"Give me liberty or give me death." A human named Patrick Henry said that. I wonder if the Yeerks knew before they came to conquer Earth that humans said things like that. I wonder if the Yeerks knew what they were getting into.

>> No.33557359

>>33554577
Uhm...

>> No.33557362

>>33557326
>"Give me liberty or give me death." A human named Patrick Henry said that. I wonder if the Yeerks knew before they came to conquer Earth that humans said things like that. I wonder if the Yeerks knew what they were getting into.

>> No.33557410

>>33557326

I wonder how he felt about all of the bullshit song lyrics that made no sense at all.

>> No.33557428

>>33557410
>Any sufficiently advanced knowledge is indistinguishable from bullshit song lyrics.

>> No.33557435

>>33557362
HFY GTFO

>> No.33557450

>>33557362
>"Give me liberty or give me death, alien scum!"
>I'm just here for the natural resources.
>Zap.

>> No.33557463

>>33557362
Honestly, Animorphs is great in that the alien viewing us is pretty much a child.

>In school, during Xenobiology, we had a section on humans. It mostly involved human television programmes. News shows. Entertainment. Music.
>Music? You mean like MTV? You were watching music videos on the Andalite home world?
>I don't remember what they were. I... I didn't pay very much attention to Xenobiology. I wish I had now. A warrior is supposed to be a scientist and an artist, as well as a fighter. But I didn't always enjoy that other stuff, so I didn't pay much attention. I suppose humans always pay attention in school.
>Absolutely. That's why I am such an expert on the War of 1812.
>A war? Tell me about it.
>I was kidding. I don't know anything about the War of 1812.

>> No.33557476

>>33557450
Well... the Yeerks might technically consider our brain power and freedom of thought a natural ressource.

>> No.33557515

>>33557476
>Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahah-
><Inhalation through spiracles>
>-ahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

>> No.33557519

>>33554581
>>33554634
>>33554666
Eh, I can think of worse musical first impressions than the Dead Kennedys.


I mean, it can't be worse than say, half the GWAR songs I get stuck in my head.

>> No.33557571

>>33557519
Prostitute Disfigurement - Rotting Away Is Better Than Being Gay

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tw50pt2HVUA

It's a Dutch ultra-edgy joke death metal band, but I doubt aliens will notice the joke.

>> No.33557615

>>33555674
>What are your religions like?
Typically preaching the idea that you shouldn't be a shit head, and then for some reason proceeding to act like a shit head.


Some belief systems skip the first part entirely, like the Westboro Baptists picketed outside.

>> No.33557621

I need to record human mating for our archives. You, and you, remove your extraneous overgarments and copulate.

>> No.33557622

Wait, you mean you can't survive exposure to a solar corona unshielded? But you said that your species crawled inside shells and became inactive at night! How did you accomplish anything?

You mean you didn't undergo the purge the moment that one of your geographic subspecies discovered how to produce the sun's holy flame in a weapon? That is how every other species in the galaxy rid itself of those unworthy for the rigors of space travel!

Wow... um... a rigid skeleton. Um... how do you get through like, doors and other tight spaces? No offense but I can't really picture it.

Why do you eat other animals of your world but not each other? Do you have a word for hypocritical?

>> No.33557733

>Is it really true you navigated via magnetic pull in ancient times?

>> No.33557743

>>33553729
Why are there 360 degrees in a circle?

>> No.33557747

>>33557621

We're... we're both males.

And he's ten.

>> No.33557755

>>33557747
And?

>> No.33557768

>>33557743
Because there are about 360 days in a year and the earth orbits in a circle.

>> No.33557785

>>33557755
And I'm gay as fuck.

I like big tits and huge asses on older women.

>> No.33557842

>>33557785
>male
>gay
>likes women
Did you really think this conversation through?

>> No.33557858

>>33557046
fuck off back to tumblr with that.

>> No.33557868

>>33557842
> Not liking women with dicks.
Are you gay?

>> No.33557958

>>33554241
Well it's going to be pretty hard to interact with an alien that would disintegrate in a light breeze

>> No.33557992

>>33555415
sure. But it's an infinitely long way away, which is why it hasn't reached us yet.

>> No.33558138

>Wait. Wait. You're composed of billions of different specialized organisms. Some of them such as your 'gut flora' are even of different species to the most noticeable! You even have seperate organisms called 'mitochondira' living inside the organisms that make you up!
>What's it like being a huge hive mind rather than one organism? Don't all the different organisms think different things? Is it confusing?

Being multicellular is fucking weird, man.

>> No.33558180

>>33557785
I'm gay and big tits are disgusting. What now?

>> No.33558258

>>33556735
Hey, biofags, is this true?

Aren't humans still technically evolving?
Doesn't societal pressure to develop intelligence still count as evolutionary pressure?

We're a species that's produced activities and tools for the general development of intelligence.
It's what education and internet were originally designed for.
More than that, we're a species with enough nutritional resources to actually maintain our brain power
(as opposed to our brains using up too much energy, and not enough is diverted to muscles or whatever, and we end up as lunch on the food web/chain).
IQ tests have to constantly be updated because 'dem young'ins turn out smarter than us.
Aristotle would be a fucking idiot by today's standards.

Am I wrong? I'm genuinely curious.

>Why can we talk so much better than do math? Because the parts of our brain for speech are so much older than the parts of our brain for calculations.

The ability to communicate well is actually useful.
So much so that it's considered as one measure of intelligence.
With it, complicated instructions become transmittable from one person to another.
It's how people, you know, learn stuff from school.

>> No.33558260

>>33558180
then you ain't gay man, you bisexual as fuck.

>> No.33558285

>>33558258
Technically yes, the human race is still "evolving"

Any mutation or defect is technically an "evolution"

>> No.33558338

>>33558285
I knew that, I'm more of asking if >>33556735 is correct in that the alien species would have the edge on intelligence given the same amount of time.

>> No.33558440

>>33556735
>Evolving intelligence is like pastry. The slower you let it bake, the better it gets.

By that logic, wouldn't the best tasting pastry ever be impossible to make, due to it having to cook for an infinite amount of time?

>> No.33558479

>>33558440
Yes, so start baking now.

>> No.33558486
File: 29 KB, 614x439, priest_exorcism.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] [report]
33558486

>>33553157
>>33553139
I BANISH YE FOUL CREATURES TO THE MAGICAL REALM FROM WHENCE YE CAME!

>> No.33558495

>>33558258
Actually, due to advances in modern medicine there is no evolutionary pressure for us to develop intelligence. Like, we had a good couple thousand years where being brainy could put you in charge of a disproportionately high share of resources, thus you, your wife and children would be well fed, thus you would have more offspring who survive to reach breeding age. Also, the limited reach of medicine would mean that only you and yours would receive treatment for illness, natal care to reduce risk of death at childbirth, etc.

But nowadays, the thing you have to understand is that while intelligence of you or your parents strongly correlates with wealth, wealth isn't actually relevant to evolution unless it defines your ability to survive. At the moment it is probably detrimental and selected against. Now sure, the poor or less intelligent have higher mortality from disease and violence even now, but there isn't enough in it when you compare to the rich and intelliegent, who reproduce sparingly.

We will only resume developing towards increased intelligence when we get back to a situation where the crafty, inventive and generally brainy folk breed like rabbits compared to their counterparts, OR there are good odds that the 7 children that a dumb couple shit out perish before the age of ten from lack of care or disease rather than simply becoming more unhealthy but fully functional copies of their parents successful r-selection based subspecies.

>> No.33558527

>>33553960
which episode did this happen?

>> No.33558569

>>33558479

But what if someone started their infinitely baked pastry before me? Theirs would be better by the time the universe ended! You'd have to go back in time to the Big Bang and start cooking your pastry then!

Also, what if the universe was created just to cook the perfect pastry?

>> No.33558570

>>33558258
>implying intelligence actually develops in a straight line and human intelligence wasn't an accidental bump
>implying any species needs to know more than how to hunt, eat and shit
>implying it's not a fucking wonder we can think about how we shit

>> No.33558579

>>33553432
I never understood why people thought hotdogs containing offal was disgusting. Meat is meat and organs other than muacle can have a lot of nutritional content too. So whata the problem?

>> No.33558584

>>33554577
To make bath time lots of fun, friend.

Hop into the tub and I'll show you.

>> No.33558639

>>33558258
While technically yes, humans are still able to evolve we've pretty much eliminated all selection pressures on our species. Smart, dumb, strong, weak, pretty much anyone can find a mate in our society /tg/ notwithstanding.

The Flynn effect, where IQ scores seem to consistently rise, is currently poorly understood but is thought to be because of increased exposure to examination and IQ-test style questions during school, rather than an actual increase in average brainpower. Recent research also suggests the Flynn effect is diminishing in more developed nations.

So basically, our brains today aren't any different than Aristotle's. It's just that we learn at an early age what was in their time the cutting edge of mathematical and scientific progress. They are the giants upon whose shoulders we stand.

>> No.33558662

>>33558495
Or, y'know, intelligence is only partially determined by genetics and mostly by education and upbringing.

>> No.33558691

>>33558579
>Whats the problem?
When it is not advertised as such.

Like last year with the horse meat scandal in Europe.

>> No.33558692

>>33558662
exhibit a: poor people

>> No.33558787

>>33558495
But doesn't our current situation just result in more variation in the human race?
I mean, if two couples - one smart and one retarded - decide to have their our offspring, you would have two sets of offspring.

This is opposed to just having one intelligent couple having their offspring.
The same number of children would occur, and they would be just as intelligent regardless of the idiot family.

The only real differences that would occur are if you marry off an intelligent person to an idiot (which is suboptimal),
or if you allow intelligent people to have their own harems.

I have no problem with the second difference.

>> No.33558799

>>33558692
Poor =/= stupid
Also, that's what public schools are supposed to be for. (Whether they actually manage the task is another debate.)

>> No.33558850

>>33553639
We don't know if there are any aliens to even contact us. One of my favorite theories to do with extraterrestrial life is sometimes called "the great filter", and basically states that advanced races destroy themselves before they are able to leave their world. It's grown in popularity somewhat in the last few decades with the discovery of hundreds of "earth like" planets, none of which show any outward signs of advance life. The more we look the more we are starting to realize the night sky is as silent as the grave. Spooky shit is spooky.

>> No.33558860

>>33558799
huh. Maybe it's different where you are, here public education sucks, particularly in poorer areas. Poor people being poorly educated is the reason they stay poor, and the cycle continues for another generation.

>> No.33558899

>>33558787
>mixing genetics is suboptimal
>idiots can only have idiot children
You wouldn't get a harem in your scenario, buddy boy.

>> No.33558904

>>33552908
>You...you squeeze body fluids out of a domesticated quadruped's lactation-sacs, spoil it ON PURPOSE until it clots, let it ROT for an indeterminate length of time and then YOU EAT IT?!!!?

>> No.33558908

"What do you mean your entire mind is contained in this little organ? How do you shapeshift if you aren't aware of every cell?"

>> No.33559077

>>33558850
There being life and there being no life is honestly equally terrifying.
>>33558860
The main problem is that governments, religions and other leading organizations have a reason to keep education at a basic minimum: a stupid population is easily distracted and readily manipulated. Uneducated poor people are a social phenomenon, not biological or evolutionary.

>> No.33559113

>>33558899
>mixing genetics is suboptimal
>implying I said this
The point was about brainpower not about you marrying your cousin.

>idiots can only have idiot children
I said idiot family - referring to parents. I also said suboptimal. It's not an ironclad rule, but was the general assumption the other anon was going for the discussion. Unless you'd like to question the last part of >>33558495.

You wouldn't get a harem either.

>> No.33559151

>>33559113
> The point was about brainpower not about you marrying your cousin.
> You'll never marry your hot cousin.

>> No.33559179

>>33559113
Don't bother, if they fail at basic reading comprehension all you can do is go home and weep for the world.

>> No.33559188

>>33558787
Evolution refers to the total genepool changing. If stupid people occupy a larger and larger portion of the gene pool, the effective intelligence of homo sapiens decreases. Evolution is a pretty forgiving term because even if natural selection is driving us towards idiocy, those idiots are still the most evolved specimens. But if people are added and removed from the gene pool essentially at random as they are now, no evolution occurs, because there is no driving stimulus to respond to.

If intelligent people never, ever interbreed with stupid people for thousands and thousands of years, and the dumbest of the intelligents are slain, as well as the smartest of the stupid, you might start to see speciation into a smart walking ape and a dumb walking ape.

And variation isn't necessarily great. People make a big deal of the irish potato famine being a sign that conformity always breeds disaster, but the fact is that there can only be one optimum design for a single task, and also higher variation provides more notional 'entry points' into the species for diseases, even if it aids in slowing their spread once they arrive.

In nature, if multiple species occupy the exact same niche the more effective one will always destroy the less competitive one, because ultimately all resources are finite. If a subspecies of human that cannot contribute as effectively as humans at literally any task arose, allowing them to continue consuming resources with the rest of us is literally just pointlessly advancing our doomsday clock.

>> No.33559210

>>33559113
Yes, I would question it. Intelligence isn't built by literally adding more intelligent people to the population, but by educating everyone on how to think and use their brains. The main obstacle to this is, as I said in >>33559077, people who want to stifle this process for personal power.

>> No.33559239

>>33559077
> stupid because governments, religions and other leading organizations

I can't say I agree with you.
Organizations do have an interest in increasing the amount of brain power they have access to, which is why some governments give out scholarships.

>> No.33559288

>>33552908
>Hold on a minute, you're saying you eat and breath through the SAME TUBE? What do you use to breath if your disgusting life-hole gets clogged with meat-sludge? Do you have a sublimation organ to prevent such things from happening?

>> No.33559294

ITT: "all people dumber than me should die"
That would still leave 90% of the world population alive, you egocentric nimrods.

>> No.33559357

>>33559239
Sure, to the best and brightest, those who've demonstrated genuine, unusual talent. They still want the majority to be under their rule.

>> No.33559844

>>33559188
Yeah, you're right. I can't think of a counter-argument.

Even considering how people tend to be attracted to those with similar perceived intelligence, resources - including living space and attention - on earth are still limited.

>>33559210
It was a line of discussion that required assumptions.

Technically speaking, we're on the same side of the debate.
I believe in general that people who engage in an activity become better at it.
Therefore, people who use their brains in general become better at using their brains.
These same people, whose brains have been epigenetically affected and who engage in activities that increase intelligence, would thus likely produce offspring who are also intelligent.

Thus, I believed that the early development of education and internet by our species would be more than enough to offset the lack of evolutionary pressure in relation to the alien species who had 2 million years of fucking mega-Australia.
However, now I'm not as confident.

>> No.33559987

>>33559844
What changed your mind?

>> No.33560070

>>33559987
>>33559844
>Yeah, you're right. I can't think of a counter-argument.

Also, shaken confidence =/= changing mind

>> No.33560319

>>33560070
I can think of a few counter-arguments.
1) Intelligence is neither linear nor uniform. There are a huge number of various ways different brains can contribute to mankind through mathematics, music, language, empathy, self-perception, categorization, and so on and so forth. Diversity breeds survival.
2) While resources are technically limited, they're still vast, and we've only harnessed a tiny fraction of what we conceivably could. Solar power, geoheat, wind and ocean currents, the huge untamed expanses of non-European continents, all these things are capable of supporting humanity many times over if we would just reach out and grab them.
3) As we said, intelligence, whatever its form, is mutable and can be trained by whoever wants to. There is no "dumb chunk of humanity", and anyone who tries to convince you otherwise is trying to sell you something, probably while degrading whatever people they deem unworthy.

>> No.33560461

>>33559294
Even if that were true, I would gladly die for the sake of leaving a cleaner world for the mankind that follows to reach for my dreams in my stead. Earth has vastly, vastly more people than are productive for essentially any fathomable purpose human beings can be put to except I dunno, punching every other vertebrate on the planet to death without using tools. It needs to stop, and while any cutoff to determine who lives and who dies is essentially arbitrary because we are all quivering meats balancing ourselves on an elaborate series of hydroxyapatite poles, it would probably be most agreeable to leave behind those best capable of continuing on mankind's most unique features, IE our capacity for critical thought and invention.

>> No.33560479

>>33559294
More likely 50%.
90% living would mean the Anons discussing here have an IQ of something like 80.

Which fits better than 100 yeah.

>> No.33560651

>>33560319
1) Intelligence is not linear or uniform, yes. That doesn't mean that there's noone on earth who is literally worse than the norm at everything. We give autists some credit for the occasional show of savantism, but contrary to popular belief this is fairly rare and intellectual disabilities are overwhelmingly just that. Not to mention that there is a huge spectrum of capability outside of glaring failures in the formation of the brain.

2) You are only thinking of electrical energy, which is only one limiting resource that the mass of humanity is steadily butting against its capacity to rip from the environment. In order to survive we are destroying vaster and vaster swathes of biodiversity of non-human species, that actual possess inventive adaptations from millions of years of indepedent evolution we could learn from, as opposed to the thousands offered by other people.

3) You've been brainwashed by the PC crowd if you believe that everyone's capacity to become intelligent through education is equal. And I don't mean 'muh some people learn in different ways' I mean there are studied genetic differences that define our ability to gather information on associations between concepts, and our ability to concentrate on a certain number of variables simultaneously.

>> No.33560664

>>33560461
>the only useful criteria are critical thought and imagination
Not only is that blatantly false, but those two aspects are attainable by anyone willing to train them. And if there is no practical application to your line of thought due to its inherent arbitrariness, why bother with it?

>> No.33560767

>What do you mean you aren't allowed to kill criminals in the streets? How do you keep your population in check?

>> No.33560792

>>33560664
A chimpanzee, sufficiently trained, would not be able to attain these as well as a human would. Likewise many humans are not as able to attain these.

The brain, as one of the many highly complex tissues constructed from our genetic blueprint, has its function greatly effected by even small changes in genetic and epigenetic makeup. People seem to be born equal if you compare to other animals, but they really, really are not. Certain beneficial mutations have greatly expanded the capacity of the human brain for critical thought to no known detriment, but surprise surprise this didn't cause everyone without that mutation to abruptly cease existing overnight.

>> No.33560862

>>33560651
1) Intellectual disabilities are also uncommon, and most of their victims can still find some way of contributing to humanity, even by a fraction of labor.

2) Species die out every day with or without our "help", and even then, most of them have nothing special compared to those who survive. We learn what we can from those we meet, theorize the rest, and steadily trudge onward.

3) >PC crowd
C'mon man. The wonderful thing about the brain is that it's malleable as hell. Genetics only play a tiny role in its ultimate capacities, kinda like athletes who depend more on training than genetics, save for the guys who go to the absolute maximum of their craft.

>> No.33561007

>How do you not just scream all the time when you do that "walking" thing? Aren't you pretty much just falling forward?

>> No.33561014

>>33560792
I can't help but wonder which groups you believe don't have those "critical thought" genes. In other words, who are you comparing to chimps?

>> No.33561199

>>33561014
You say this like you expect to be able to guilt me into rescinding my argument because my argument is 'mean' to certain people.

In any case, the groups, by their nature, are defined by who has the gene and who doesn't. There can be a racial association, but ultimately every one of these mutations has to be capable of 'catching on' into new populations or it never would have made its way into the genetics of the first hosts children, and it isn't like any race on Earth has had less time to evolve. For an example of the sort of thing I am talking about, see "Neurotensin Receptor 1 Gene (NTSR1) Polymorphism Is Associated with Working Memory " which is available for viewing on the Public Library of Science website.

>> No.33561845

>>33561199
I don't care about 'meanness', I care about the implication that these genes somehow determine worthiness to live in your eyes. In nature, the "unworthy" die, simple as that. If you're alive, you still deserve to live.

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