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/tg/ - Traditional Games

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[ERROR] No.32844180 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

I'm running in a Savage Worlds Hellfrost game. What I'm about to tell you happened last night.

We were in the Freelands city-state of Aslov and got a job to break into the home of a wealthy Anari merchant and find proof that he had hired mercenaries to kidnap the son of a rival.

Night falls and we've made our way through twisting city streets to the merchant's home. We decide the best way inside is for the sneakiest person and the only one with points in climb to scale the outside wall to get into the merchant's bedroom. This means sending in Yrsa. Yrsa is our Rogue (of sorts, since SW doesn't have classes). She's a Hearth Elf who was found abandoned as an infant on the edge of an Elfhome forest and raised by humans in the rough end of town.

Without missing a beat Yrsa's player announces. "Alright, Yrsa proceeds to take all of her clothes off and scale the wall." Which prompts a chorus of "What the fuck are you doing?!" from the players and a facepalm from the GM.

Without breaking character Yrsa's player explains. "Look, in order to be stealthy, I need to be as light as possible, my armor weighs me down."

"Yeah, but if you get caught..."

"If I get caught, Elianor (the merchant's wife) will come running, and promptly find her husband in bed with a naked Elf. I can use the ensuing argument as cover to escape."

I quickly realize, that I can't argue with this logic. Elianor is a notorious harridan and we did witness the merchant bickering with her earlier that day.

>> No.32844210

well you found THAT GUY in your party

>> No.32844264

Who, the GM?

Because that's some pretty fucking sound logic, of the kind my players use on each-other all the time.

It's not usually the one playing the female elf that'll come up with that, mind you, and the whole party would much rather the merchant get caught with the hobgoblin because they're eyeing his building lot.

>> No.32844418

you'd think wearing light clothing suitable for your role as party burglar would be preferable to hauling yourself over stone walls in the buff. you can always toss your breeches back out the window once you're inside.

>> No.32844438

OP here, it did work out brilliantly.

The Elf was down to her last benny and ended up having to burn that one to keep from a rather nasty fall while climbing into his window.

So she gets into the room and the DM has Yrsa's player roll sneak.

Snake eyes. Critical-failure. The merchant wakes up and agrily demands to know who she is, but freezes when he sees her, giving Yrsa time to dive-tackle him to the bed and put on her best sultry expression (36 roll on a d8 Persuasion) in time for Elianor to arrive. Que Elianor chasing her husband around the room with a pewter candleholder screaming at him for being a two-timing, unfaithful scoundrel. His cries us "I swear this isn't what it looks like!" only fuelling her rage. This gives Yrsa plenty of time to snatch his Ledger and escape with the evidence, while Elianor knocks over a candelabra and starts a fire.

>> No.32844468


>> No.32844518


This. There's no situation ever where climbing around in the buff at night is preferable to a light outfit. Your elf is really really bad at her job, OP.

>> No.32844701

I think this entire GROUP is that guy if they let this slide.

>> No.32845456

ITT: OP tries to make excuses for running a thinly veiled ERP, gets told.

>> No.32845486


ITT: Puritanism is not yet as dead as one might have though.

In this case I think some people got their panties in a twist over nothing.

>> No.32845487

How is this anyway ERP?

>> No.32845955

>> No.32846041


It's kinda fucking stupid. Clothed elves in bed with husband will make a wife go mad about as much as naked elves in bed.

And that's taking the risk of having to fight someone naked, which isn't fucking easy when you're not an ancient greek faggot.

>> No.32846098

>In this case I think some people got their panties in a twist over nothing.

It's like you're new to /tg/ or something.

>> No.32846113


Not like the ancient Greeks went into battle naked either. They just drew people like that because it looked manly as fuck in their eyes.

>> No.32846188


Ancient Greeks did use to train naked. Like faggots.

>> No.32846227

They did exercise naked though.

>> No.32846541

Not just naked, when they were exercising they would smear themselves with Olive Oil so, instead of bathing they just scraped the oil and dirt off with a knife.

>> No.32846584


>washing yourself with a knife after a busy day of naked man groping.

This is the most manly homosexual shit ever. Or the most homosexually macho thing. Not sure which one.

>> No.32846694

So this?

>> No.32846753

apparently people would buy the scraped off dirt+oil thinking that since it came off of a strong guy, there must be some sort of strong guy magic in it.

>> No.32846832

>Being naked is that guy behavior.
Anyone who thinks this is That Guy.

>> No.32846866

>instead of bathing they just scraped the oil and dirt off with a knife.
Given they didn't have particularly effective soaps at the time, this was pretty common. It was also surprisingly effective, as not only did you walk away clean, the scraping naturally exfoliated you as well so your man-hide was creamy soft.

>> No.32847048

Deliberately stripping down to act seductive and sexy is pretty weird to do.

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