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[ERROR] No.30258296 [DELETED]  [Reply] [Original] [4plebs] [archived.moe]

"Ignore the racket made by these savages. There are more women than men in their ranks. They are not soldiers - they're not even properly equipped. We've beaten them before and when they see our weapons and feel our spirit, they'll crack. Stick together. Throw the javelins, then push forward: knock them down with your shields and finish them off with your swords. Forget about plunder. Just win and you'll have everything."
-Gaius Suetonius Paulinus prior to the Battle of Watling Streetin in which Boudica's revolt was put down.

Can we have a Roman thread? Discuss Roman themed wargames and tabletop rpgs. What's your favorite fantasy civilization based on Rome?

>> No.30258429

Can I talk about how much I don't like Rome

>> No.30258442


>> No.30258462

Fuck off, Carthage, nobody likes you.

Can we talk about Tartessos, i.e. Best Spain?

>> No.30258468

>tfw writing up a Roman-themed paladin

What's Latin for "PRAISE THE SUN"?

>> No.30258477


>> No.30258488

Isn't that "I will sodomize your face and irrumabo?"

>> No.30258505

I will sodomize you and face-fuck you.

>> No.30258560

OP here. Roman hate is welcome. I mean it's only natural to hate a civilization that's so obviously superior to yours in every way you unwashed pants wearing barbarian

>> No.30258563

Laudate sole?

Solar fide is fitting as well.

>> No.30258597

Laudate Gloriam Solis Invictus. Literally 'Sing the Glory of the Unconquered Sun!'

>> No.30258605

Pff, Persians > you. They had civilization before the Romans even learned to make huts, and had it after the Romans were toppled by a bunch of pig-farmers.

They didn't have to steal all their myth and philosophy either.

>> No.30258610

Skaven are pretty Roman.

>> No.30258615

>> No.30258617

Yeah, they're roman around damn near everywhere

>> No.30258623

>> No.30258636 [SPOILER] 

>Meanwhile, in a small gaulish village on the coast of Armorica

>> No.30258672

>Alexander called, he says you take it in the ass

Persians got their shit wrecked by Macedonia

Also being refounded by the Parthians and Sassanians in an attempt to get back to the Achaemenids doesn't count as one continuous Persian empire

>> No.30258685

I didn't say Greeks weren't greater yet. They obviously are.

>> No.30258734

Tiny Romans or Giants?

>> No.30258776

Not sure, which sounds more fun
Halfling legionaries fighting human barbarians

Or human legionaries fighting giant barbarians

>> No.30258787

If Ancient Persia is so superior how come there's are little to no Zoroastrians in Iran and the whole place is now sandnigger?

>> No.30258797

Because Muslims are a religions of peace.

>> No.30258818

Fuck, I meant Islam. Jesus I need to sleep.

>> No.30258833

Pretty big thing to say for a people who disdained the use of soap and had communal baths.

Hows the dermatitis working out for you?

And you knew that lead was dangerous. But you still used lead cutlery and prepared all your favorite food in lead pots. Not that I'm saying all your aristocrats and leaders were suffering from lead poisoning. There must have been at least one or two not that stupid. Maybe.

Also Britain. Why did you have to go there anyway? They had only three things worth exporting; tin, dogs and slaves. You can get those from anywhere. You had 1/12th - 1/10th of your entire military might stationed on that rainy little island for matters of pride and arrogance and believed that putting Boudica down would be a victory. YOu can't have victory over a people like that. They thought war was a sport. They had little concept of mortality. And they were off their heads on 'shrooms. Its not a people you can intimidate.

Building the wall was the smartest thing Emperor Hadrian ever did. Pitty Emperor Severus wasn't as smart. "lets push back the Picts. Romans don't need to cower behind a wall". swiftly followed by "Oh shit, everybody back to the wall".

You never made your investment back on Britain and Saxons, fucking Saxons, laugh at you behind your back. Fucking Scandinavians who took up farming instead of Viking. And there was fuck all you could do about it.

Also the Goths say pay up you still owe them.

>> No.30258851

If Ancient Rome is so superior how come there are no one who believes in Rome's pantheon, they're just Christians?

>> No.30258857

Hey, hey! Our dogs are bloody good! We have bloody good dogs!

>> No.30258865

There's more Zoroastrians than Roman pagans

>> No.30258871

I like rome because of its graffiti

>Secundus defecated here
>Apollinaris, the doctor of the emperor Titus, defecated well here

Romans best shittalkers

>O walls, you have held up so much tedious graffiti that I am amazed that you have not already collapsed in ruin.

>> No.30258872

Those wacky Romans: http://www.pompeiana.org/resources/ancient/graffiti%20from%20pompeii.htm

>(Bar/Brothel of Innulus and Papilio); 3932: Weep, you girls. My penis has given you up. Now it penetrates men’s behinds. Goodbye, wondrous femininity!

>(peristyle of the Tavern of Verecundus); 3951: Restitutus says: “Restituta, take off your tunic, please, and show us your hairy privates”.

>(Bar of Athictus; right of the door); 8442: I screwed the barmaid

>(Vico d’ Eumachia, small room of a possible brothel); 2145: Gaius Valerius Venustus, soldier of the 1st praetorian cohort, in the century of Rufus, screwer of women

>(bar/inn joined to the maritime baths); 10675: Two friends were here. While they were, they had bad service in every way from a guy named Epaphroditus. They threw him out and spent 105 and half sestertii most agreeably on whores.

>on a water distribution tower); 10488: Anyone who wants to defecate in this place is advised to move along. If you act contrary to this warning, you will have to pay a penalty. Children must pay [number missing] silver coins. Slaves will be beaten on their behinds.

>> No.30258926

Pretty big thing to say for a people who disdained the use of soap and had communal baths.

Not knowing about glorious olive oil and strigil
>being this barbarian
>consulship of Pompey and Crassus + 2084

>> No.30258929

Yes, we rove Rome... Yes, keep sending gold down de Sirk Road... Yes...

>> No.30258931

>Epaphra, you are bald!


>> No.30258943

>graffiti mind

>> No.30258964

Graffiti is pretty much low-tech imageboards for the romans.

>> No.30258981

Yeah actually they did love Rome

"Their kings are not permanent. They select and appoint the most worthy man. If there are unexpected calamities in the kingdom, such as frequent extraordinary winds or rains, he is unceremoniously rejected and replaced. The one who has been dismissed quietly accepts his demotion, and is not angry. The people of this country are all tall and honest. They resemble the people of the Middle Kingdom and that is why this kingdom is called Da Qin. This country produces plenty of gold [and] silver, [and of] rare and precious [things] they have luminous jade, 'bright moon pearls,' Haiji rhinoceroses, coral, yellow amber, opaque glass, whitish chalcedony, red cinnabar, green gemstones, gold-thread embroideries, woven gold-threaded net, delicate polychrome silks painted with gold, and asbestos cloth.
They also have a fine cloth which some people say is made from the down of 'water sheep' [= sea silk], but which is made, in fact, from the cocoons of wild silkworms (= wild silk). They blend all sorts of fragrances, and by boiling the juice, make a compound perfume. [They have] all the precious and rare things that come from the various foreign kingdoms. They make gold and silver coins. Ten silver coins are worth one gold coin. They trade with Anxi [Parthia] and Tianzhu [North-western India] by sea. The profit margin is ten to one. . . . The king of this country always wanted to send envoys to the Han, but Anxi [Parthia], wishing to control the trade in multi-coloured Chinese silks, blocked the route to prevent [the Romans] getting through [to China]."


>> No.30259007

>primus scriptor est fasciculum

>> No.30259040

>tfw he's describing the adoptive succession system of the Five good Emperors.
>tfw that only lasted less than a century and then it was back to civil wars for the purple.

>> No.30259043

Wasn't there a Roman Legion that went to China and went native?

>> No.30259059

I don't into latin

>> No.30259064


This statue looks at me with contempt

>> No.30259083

>The kingdom of the Daqin is also called Lijian

>> No.30259117

>your civilization will never have laws against being a shitty petite bourgeoisie like laws prohibting serving fancy fish on no occasion and in general being a showy little asshole.
How many civs had shit like that? I know the spartans kept their teen girls naked in ceremonies so they wouldn't be caught up in showing off their new clothes (sure spartans, sure)

>> No.30259121

>first writer is a bundle of sticks, possibly containing an axe as a symbol of strength through unity.

You know, if the gay community was okay with associating themselves with Mussolini, it'd be easy for them to reclaim the word 'faggot'

>> No.30259129


This one looks at you with even more.

(Vespasian was awesome)

>> No.30259131

Probably not


Look up hypothetical military contact

>> No.30259148

That's a legend with no real supporting evidence

>> No.30259165

It was a Legion captured in Persia.


>> No.30259183

What's some good historical dramatization of roman history? I've liked I, Claudius and Masters of Rome so far. Something that focuses on culture is the best, the characters and drama comes second

>> No.30259202

>In 530/31 A.D. Justinian I attempted to enlist the aid of the contemporary Axumite king Kaleb in a war against the South Arabian ruler Dhu Nuwas, who had converted to Judaism and was alleged to be persecuting the Christian inhabitants of his realm. In this excerpt from his report the Roman ambassador Julian provides a unique and vivid description of an Axumite king dressed in his full royal regalia. The following text is from the Chronographia of Theophanes..

>In the same year (527), the Romans and Persians broke their peace. The Persian war was renewed because of the embassy of the Homeritan Indians (Himyarite Arabs) to the Romans. The Romans sent the Magistrianos Julian from Alexandria down the Nile River and through the Indian Ocean (i.e., the Red Sea) with sacral letters to Arethas (in fact, King Kaleb), the king of the Ethiopians. King Arethas (Kaleb) received him with great joy, since Arethas longed after the Roman Emperor's friendship.

>On his return (to Constantinople), this same Julian reported that King Arethas was naked when he received him but had round his kidneys a loincloth of lien and gold thread. On his belly he wore linen with precious pearls; his bracelets had five spikes, and he wore gold armlets by his hands. He had a linen and gold cloth turban round his head, with four cords hanging down from both its straps.

>He stood on (a carriage drawn by) four standing elephants which had a yoke and four wheels. Like any stately carriage, it was ornamented with golden petals, just as are the carriages of provincial governors. While he stood upon it, he held in his hands a small gilded shield and two gold javelins. His counselors were all armed, and sang musical tunes.

I think the ancient Ethiopians were from a game of Dwarf Fortress.

>> No.30259233

>tfw China had bibles before Spain

>> No.30259256

>It might have been but probably wasn't a Legion captured in Persia

Fixed that for you

>> No.30259290

Nigger this guy was the king of contempt.

>> No.30259295

>> No.30259307

There's always the HBO Rome series and the Spartacus series. Not always the most accurate but fun.

>> No.30259328


He looks more sad then contemptuous.

>> No.30259330

Why do people always consider the romans the go-to evil empire? they seem particularly nice for an empire at the time. At worst they're as bad as USA is now

>> No.30259341

Then why are there so few Christians in China today, but so many in Spain?

>> No.30259352

that's not what I read from his expression. I'm reading contempt

>> No.30259374


>> No.30259390

Mass slavery, brutal treatment of prisoners, gladiator fights, olde rape of the sabine women followed by new rape of the sabine women - all exaggerated by various degrees by the modern media.

>> No.30259394

Because ROME number I
and filthy foereigners with their BABABABABABAB baabaaa noise

>> No.30259417

>dat scowl.

>> No.30259421

Sparticus always bugged me, especially in the last season. After the first episode or two I was cheering for the Romans to just put the savages down.

>> No.30259444

>Why do people always consider the romans the go-to evil empire?

They are? I always saw them as good guys and bastion of democracy.

>> No.30259462

This Numidian gets it

>> No.30259469

What always bothered me about ROME was how simple most senators seemed to be. easily swayed by simple outbursts from orators. YEAH! YEAH! as long as someone spoke with enough oomph. Senators were slimy as fuck, and not easily swayed.

>> No.30259473


Don't forget extremely aggressive expansionism.

>> No.30259527


How did the word "rome" turn into Da Qin?

>> No.30259531

Because the Communists won the civil war.

>> No.30259535

They needed it to fuel their military. The legion system and conquering more land fed off of each other, and drove the Empire.

>> No.30259539

It means Great Qin, Qin being the dynasty that founded China.

>> No.30259556

Mass slavery, brutal treatment of prisoners,

>remind me which ancient civilizations were better?

gladiator fights

>9/10ths of which were not to the death and were about as real as WWE

olde rape of the sabine women followed by new rape of the sabine women

Rape of the Sabine women was at a festival dedicated to Neptune

>this is why Romans cannot into naval power

>> No.30259562

>>Roman Empire
>bastion of democracy

The roman republic maybe.

The Roman Empire was full of decadence and glorified bloodshed.

Also, bread and circuses

>> No.30259565

So basically Rome was cancer

>> No.30259566

Republic rome best rome.
Where even a new man could gain rule and dignitas. There was an element of evolution.
And of course, this led to super cool plotting and conspiracies. the shit that went down between the gracchi brothers and the italic wars is more interesting to me than hundreds of years of roman expansion and fall

>> No.30259575

I see you have a pretty well-functioning empire over there. We have one too. Although ours is like, ten times better. So how's about we name YOU, after US?

mfw Koreans had to deal with this shit for 3000+ years

>> No.30259597


What's your point? It still meant invading and conquering other lands and taking their stuff, killing their soldiers, and raping their women. It's a perfectly logical reason for non-Romans to view them as an evil empire.

>> No.30259603

Hey, don't shoot the messenger. I was just saying why people might consider them evil.

>> No.30259627

Halfling Legionnaires

I am now going to fluff a Halfling Rome

>> No.30259675

>Halfling Rome
>Human Barbarians
>Dwarven Persia
>Elven Africa

>> No.30259679

Besides some Greeks and the Jews, the dichotomy of good vs. evil didn't really exist in the Western World at that period. Sure, the non-Romans hated Rome, but because they thought they were being treated poorly or their honor was besmirched, not because the Romans were "evil."

>> No.30259691


Who gets to be the trade-empires of Greater Khorasan?

>> No.30259737


>> No.30259739

Codex Alera books.

Because crossing a lost Roman Legion with Pokemon and fighting armies of honorbound blood magic spewing werewolves, empathic yetis, and Zerg never felt so right.

>> No.30259740

>No kushite lizard people

>> No.30259743

All Indians are Drow.

>> No.30259756

There was once a DnD setting splat I read that had all of that. It was set during the reign of Phillip the Arab but the whole ancient world peoples were replaced by fantasy races. I'm gonna start searching for the PDF now.

>> No.30259764

You have good taste

>> No.30259765

>not persian elves and indian dwarves
>humans are still barbarians

>> No.30259772


Greater Khorasan was Central Asia, not India. It's where all the countries ending in -stan are now.

>> No.30259778

So we combine the two awesome but still loser races together? Doesn't that seem unfair?

>> No.30259798

China is warforged

>> No.30259806

I liked that series.

Total mish-mash of an idea that turned into a glorious mess and a damn good story.

>> No.30259817

China is Kobolds without a doubt.

Africa is Orcs/Goblins

And the Mongols? Gnolls.

They ride female gnolls into battle who are giant hyenas

>> No.30259829

China is Eladrin

>> No.30259835


Shouldn't Mongols be centaurs?

>> No.30259836

>not ratmen

>> No.30259846

I guess that works too

>> No.30259871

>Halfling Rome
>Elven Persia
>Dwarven Greece
>Hobgoblin barbarians

If we're going to give out ancient civilizations to fantasy races why bother having humans

>> No.30259875

Oh hey!

>> No.30259910

Ok so

>Rome = Halflings
>Persia = Elves
>India = Dwarves
>Africa = Orcs
>Gauls/Franks/Brits = Humans
>China = Kobolds
>Korea = Goblins
>Mongols = Centaurs
>Japan = Tengu
>Russians = Bugbears

anything I miss?

>> No.30259913

General or basic millitary culture of the nation (equipment, formations, etc.). What's more important?

>> No.30259914

Evil, dumb monster races are boring

>> No.30259931


Central Asia

>> No.30259950

so is china

>> No.30259951

>thinking Orcs and Gnolls have to be evil or dumb

Please rephrase your question.

>> No.30259954

I got nothing. Who lived in Central Asia again? I thought it was the Mongols.

>> No.30259973

I feel we should separate north african phoenician-derived cultures from greco-egyptians and nubian/aethiopian civilisations. I still think the latter should be lizardfolk.

>> No.30259979

What is more decisive for a battle? The general leading it, or the military standards of the army.

>> No.30259993

So Egypt/North africa = Lizard folk
South/Ethiopic Africa = orcs

>> No.30260004

Well then, who would be the Canaanites/Phoenicians/Punics?

>> No.30260038

Hmm. What races are known for their sailing? Probably should have classical greeks as well.

>> No.30260060

What is an orc or gnoll other than dumb and evil?

Races like dwarves and elves at least have other things that define them.

>> No.30260073


Mongols lived north of China in the steppes. Central Asia, the region that is now Uzbekistan, Tajikistan, Afghanistan, etc, was ruled by a series of trade empires like the Sogdians, Transoxianans, and Khwarezmians.

Basically, you had China at one end of the Silk Road, Persia/Rome at the other, and all these guys gorwing fat on trade who lived right in the center.

>> No.30260118



>> No.30260120

I feel like dwarves are a better fit for Greece than India

>> No.30260128

If Persia is gonna be Dwarves, then Phoenicia might as well be Duergr.

Also, why the fuck are China kobolds? I agree with this guy >>30259829

>> No.30260145

Greece. I meant "if Greece is gonna be Dwarves"

>> No.30260169

>Also, why the fuck are China kobolds?
Their Emperor is 'descended from the Celestial Dragon'

>captcha scales ffnlien

Yes Captcha, there is a fine line with scales

>> No.30260181


India should be Naga or Vanara.

>> No.30260190

I'm >>30259675 and the reason I put the races where they are is to avoid having them "fit". I find it more interesting to take these boilerplate races and see how they'd work as cultures they are not usually portrayed as.

>> No.30260218

They should be that one dnd race which is split up into elements, to represent their caste system.

>> No.30260231

The Only War book pits you against a Rogue Trader's secessionist Empire, who were Very clearly Romans.

>> No.30260233

>Fire elementals are untouchables

>> No.30260262

>Their Emperor is 'descended from the Celestial Dragon'
so draconians or somesuch
kobolds are filthy, wretched things

>> No.30260265


I love shooting messengers. Since they have run very fast they make a sport out of it.

>> No.30260271


>> No.30260289

Well, we are talking about the chinese. Dohohohoho.

>> No.30260301

aren't we the budding comedian

>> No.30260303

Himegawa pls.

>> No.30260306


Why not just make China an empire ruled by rich, elitist dragons?

>> No.30260333

Because 90+ percent of China is one ethnicity.

>> No.30260335

Well the original idea was to have them all be roughly on par with humans and other standard player races

>> No.30260366

>Plant elementals are entertainers

>> No.30260371

The ruling class is usually not more than 10% of the population dawg

>> No.30260381


So maybe just the ruling nobles/emperors are dragons, and the majority of the population is some sort of lesser dragonkin.

>> No.30260427

Yes, but that one ethnicity just so happens to comprise more or less 100% of the ruling class in China.

>> No.30260439

>legionaries with facial hair

Disgusting, do they even discipline?

>> No.30260441

That guy looks exactly like Sam Vimes. I'm now seeing Vimes as captain of the night watch in Rome, at the height of the empire.

>> No.30260465

>What's your favorite fantasy civilization based on Rome?

The Byzantine Empire.

They got so into the roleplay the people who conquered/got obsessed with them claimed the mantle.

>> No.30260471

To be honest I just don't like the idea of them being draconic at all. It's too typical, like Scottish dwarves.

>> No.30260472

This sounds like the best idea. But instead of the ruling class, it should be that just the Emperor (or kings if China hasn't united yet) are the real dragons, nobles and officials are the dragonborn, and peasants are just some disgusting middle race called "humans"

>> No.30260512


I want to know where this is from so I can giggle at Japan's portrayal of the greatest Empire ever to grace this Earth.

>> No.30260535

Has anyone else read the simon scarrow roman series?

With Cato and Macro

I am on the 6th book atm and loving it, but the 5th book was a bit sleepy

>> No.30260635


Just found it:

>A.D 70 The mightiest empire Rome started conquering the world. The whole Europe was havocked by Roman's foot. In Ablion, in order to protect their homeland, the Bravest Wyvern fought a bloody battle against the invader... The term Bestiarii (???) refers to those that fought against beasts, whether through voluntary combat or execution, during the Ancient Roman era. Bestiarius refers to a single Bestiarii.

>> No.30260647

Ok so

>Rome = Halflings
>Persia = Elves
>Greece = Dwarves
>India= Genasi
>Phoenicians= Duergr
>Gauls/Franks/Brits = Humans
>China = Dragons, Dragonborn, and Humans
>Mongols = Centaurs
>Native North Africans= Orcs
>Nubians= Lizard-folk

Cultures still open
>Xiongnu/Huns (I think these should be gnolls)
>Other horse peoples such as Sauromatae

>> No.30260682


jews are rat people

>> No.30260686


>That delightful misunderstanding of terms
>That premise
>That broken English

Ooooo this is going to be so DELIGHTFUL!

>> No.30260709

Pls just don't.

>> No.30260737


Jews are supposed to be Dwarves but ok.

Maybe Gnomes?

>> No.30260755

Sub-Saharan Africa should be thri-kreen

>> No.30260838

Sauromatae weren't a culture of themselves, but were instead a state which was of the wider Scythian culture. Also, you can stop being a hipster and call them Sarmatians like everybody else.

>> No.30260892

Point taken, fucker. Do you think I should distinguish between Scythians and Turkics as well? Or is the period too early for that.

>> No.30260988

Turkic peoples weren't really doing anything at this point. They can just be centaurs like the Mongols. Maybe even the Scythians should be elf-centaurs since Elves are Persian.

>> No.30261014

>rome wasn't patched in a day.png

>> No.30261049


Not really, just finished it (less than 100 pages).
Would not read again.

>> No.30261054

What should Aztecs/Mayans be?

>> No.30261067

I assume Crete is populated entirely with minotaurs.

>> No.30261141

I'm not going to just let every horse culture be a centaur flavor, though.


>> No.30261211

>And you knew that lead was dangerous. But you still used lead cutlery and prepared all your favorite food in lead pots. Not that I'm saying all your aristocrats and leaders were suffering from lead poisoning. There must have been at least one or two not that stupid. Maybe.
Swapped out for pewter and ceramics after they noticed slaves getting fucked up in the mines.
>Also Britain. Why did you have to go there anyway? They had only three things worth exporting; tin, dogs and slaves. You can get those from anywhere.
1. Tin is not actually ubiquitous, it was a very pricey commodity.
2. Iron was in abundance in the British isles.
3. The British tribes were funding the Gaul rebellions that were costing Rome dearly.

>> No.30261310

Iberians are still Celts and therefore still barbar. They should be humans, too.

>> No.30261345

An entire thread about Rome on /tg/ and no-one reposts Commodus' response to "swords are pleb tier"? Damn shame.

>> No.30261423


Now imagine this as fantasy Manchus. The ten thousand sons of the elder wyrm Nurhaci dominate the senior posts of government.

>> No.30261513

Humans, or perhaps orcs. Which races tend to go happy on the stylized, ritual sacrifices and martial expansionism? Gnomes or humans.

>> No.30261554

They should be mindflayers. All the tribes around them are Githzerai, who just needed some human help to overthrow the bastards.

>> No.30261591

No, peasants should be Kobolds

>> No.30261614

>Spaniard halfling explorers accidentally genocide mindflayers by giving them the flue of a lifetime, causing them to seek means of countering this infernal virus - sacrificing many to go through time and seek a cure.
Hey, it works!

>> No.30261620

Wow, that really sounds like a villain's speech. Like the kind of speech an English captain in Braveheart would give.

>> No.30261636


>> No.30261668



Maybe. Let's stick to Eurasian antiquity for now, though.

>> No.30261739

What we have so far:
>Rome = Halflings
>Persia = Elves
>Greece = Dwarves
>India= Genasi
>Phoenicians= Duergar
>Gauls/Franks/Celts = Humans

>China = Dragons, Dragonborn, and Kobolds
>Mongols/Turkics= Centaurs
>Native North Africans= Orcs
>Nubians/Abyssinians= Lizard-folk
>Huns= Gnolls

Cultures still open:

>> No.30261978

Because the mongols destroyed everything that was beautiful about Persia and reduced it to a desolate wasteland.

>> No.30262286

Except that sandnigger Islam comes before Mongols

>> No.30263763

Why the heck are those elephants behind the Carthaginian front line?

>> No.30264149

The better question is what the hell are post Marian Legionaries doing fighting Carthaginians?

>> No.30264190

Custom Battle button.

>> No.30264591

i have a similar image to this where it looks like a parthian is riding a unicorn thanks to a spear

>> No.30264888

OP here. Look what I finally found sitting in my books folder.

>> No.30266699

>Not orcs

>> No.30266969

>He poisoned our plague, burned our water supply, and sent crops onto our houses
>He did?
>No, but he kept us waiting for a bubble.

>> No.30267070

I don't speak fag language, what are you saying?

Shit reference,what doe SpongeBob SquarePants have to do with anything?

>> No.30267266

Read into constantine

>> No.30267766

What about the Huns then? They were late Roman contemporaries.

>> No.30267902

The Huns did fight against Sassanian Perisa.

>Persia won
c. 435-438, Huns attack Sassanid Persia and are defeated in Armenia
For several years, the Huns essentially drop out of Roman records. This is because Bleda and Attila were engrossed in a fight against the Sassanid Empire of Persia. The Sassanids finally were able to inflict a heavy defeat on the Huns in present-day Armenia, thus fending them off.


>> No.30267924

turns out a horse archery based horde is less of a threat to a culture who can field just as many horse archers.

>> No.30268074

Dromedarii are cool

>> No.30268106

>O walls, you have held up so much tedious graffiti that I am amazed that you have not already collapsed in ruin.

So, 4chan is Rome?

>> No.30268148

>The historian Homer H. Dubs

Well, dubs confirms it.

>> No.30268159


So thatc is the reason for Huns avoidance of Anatolia
The more you know

>who can field just as many horse archers.
I have no base, but I claim that they outnumbered Huns by at least tenfold.

>> No.30268212

WallChan was full of shitwriting cancer and there were no mods to speak of unless you count when they tried scrubbing the graffiti.

>> No.30268410

I'm planning on setting my next D&D campaign in a fantasy facsimile of the mediterranean during Pax Romana, or maybe the Punic Wars or something. I'm going to replace certain ethnicities with fantasy races

>Humans are Romans
>Greeks are Dwarves
>Northern barbarians are Elves
>North Africans are Orcs
>Dacians/Thracians are Goblinoids
>Persians are Kobolds
>Indus River peoples are Gnomes
>Egyptians are ???

the biggest hangup so far is that I can't figure out who the villain should be.

>> No.30268419

>I have no base, but I claim that they outnumbered Huns by at least tenfold.

either way the point remains that a cavalry focused nation is better suited to deal with a nomadic horde of horse archers.

>> No.30268570


At their height both England and Rome were The Empire. Captial T capital E, and when you're a general of The Empire, leading troops into battle against savages, you speak a certain way.

>> No.30268625

>either way
What does Stannis the Mannis say?
>9/10 numbers win.

Please find some numbers if you can, that would ease the argument very quickly.

And no, it never came down to cavalry vs cavalry performing better than cavalry vs infantry.That would be only relevant when numbers are more or less comparable.

>> No.30268735

Read through this. The BBEG are the undead former Emperors.

>> No.30268992

unfortunately that's what the villains from my last campaign were: undead former emperors

>> No.30269129

Maybe have something similar to the rise of Christianity. All the old gods are fading away because one singular and extremely ego-centric god is taking over the place.

>> No.30269172

that might be a bit controversial

>> No.30269249

Well you don't have to follow that them exactly. Also think about reversing the concept. The empire has already gotten rid of the old evil gods and replaced them with a singular benevolent deity. The villains would be the evil forces trying to bring back the old gods.

>> No.30270314

In a supreme bout of irony, I have decided the Jews should be Tieflings.

>> No.30270388


Jews should be warforged, hence the weird relationship they have with their creator.

>> No.30270525

Are there any systems dedicated to playing in the Ancient World, or am I just going to have to use D&D?

>> No.30270625

A genius can't lead a gaggle of jews to beat rome.

Even an imperial legion won't break phalangnites without a competent leader.

>> No.30270645

>citation required

>> No.30270780

There's the Imperial Rome GURPS sourcebook which is very well researched.

Also there's another system called Republic of Rome, & Rise and Fall (i think that's the name) but I know little about it.

Also I heard there was a West End Games Romans RPG somewhere. There's probably a few obscure Roman themed rpgs out there.

>> No.30270785

>every jewish revolt
They were NEVER going to win. Thsi is because they were poorly armed, poorly trained, and poorly organized. Even an excellent leader would not have saved them.
>every battle where rome took on a sucessor state
They only ever won due to skilled leadership, roman forces got shit on head to head, and the actual soldiers WANTED to fight the hellnes head on.

>> No.30270866 [SPOILER] 

But anon, the Jewish revolt did succeed. Just ask Constantine.

>> No.30270880

Tell THAT to the temple mount.

>> No.30270929

Sounds great. Thanks.

>> No.30270973

One of Constantine's successors Julian (known as "the Apostate) actual authorized a rebuilding of the temple which never got off the ground. I think there might have been more efforts in Byzantine times but then the Arab invasions put an end to that.

>> No.30271015

They tried to rebuild carthage more than once, too.

Rinme didn't have weaboos, but they DID have fanboys for most other things they wiped out.
Seems to be a human constant.

>> No.30271056


Savage Worlds just put out Weird Wars: Rome

>> No.30271426


>> No.30271839

And Roman was greater than the Greeks.

>> No.30271853

Christianity is a Roman religion.

>> No.30271905

I actually have been working on a setting for a book where the various ethnic groups are replaced with fantasy races. Indo-Aryan line are mostly Elven, Asiatics tend to be Halflings and Dwarves, while Slavs are Orcs, and Germanic tribes are Ogres, Celts are also elves. I may swap that at with Germanics.

Greeks are Human, as are Latins, and Berbers.

>> No.30271921

>>consulship of Pompey and Crassus + 2084

To my sides who are about to die, I salute you!

>> No.30271935

The wall was not the upper limit of Roman influence. It was designed to help limit travel and facilitate control over trade.


>> No.30271952

I laughed way more than I should have.

>> No.30271973

Yeah hell most of Scotland was under Roman rule at one time or another. All the tribes beyond the wall were mostly friendly roman Allies which forced the Picts to have to circumvent the walls via sea to raid.

>> No.30272040

>Uzbekistan, Tajikistan, Afghanistan, etc, was ruled by a series of trade empires like the Sogdians, Transoxianans, and Khwarezmians.
>Trade Empires.
Nah more like a bunch of Khans riding around and establishing empires and killing each other.

They then got into Islam but stil continued calling themselves Khans, riding around, killing each other, and invading Persia BUT with Jihad this time.

>> No.30272329

>Year of my Father's Rule 2014
>Giving unto Caesar what belongs to God

>> No.30273351

Yeah, isn't there a quote from an Indian soldier of how the British rolled up, killed everyone in a Fort, removed the corpses and started having breakfast?
There's a brilliant quote from a regular British soldier fighting the Mahadists after they managed to break a British square:
>Anyhow, the Soudanese broke a British square, and that is something to their credit. Our seven pounders were thus left outside...
>...At last the Gatling guns were got into action, and that practically ended the battle. The Soudanese were simply mown down. Their bodies flew up into the air like grass from a lawn0mower. But their pluck was astonishing. I saw some natives dash up to the Gatling guns, and thrust their arms down the muzzles, trying to extract the bullets which were destroying their comrades! Of course, they were simply blown to atoms.
When you become The Empire, even the rank and file soldier changes mindset. We've got that with Murrica today, even if there aren't any good wars on.

>> No.30274261

Just like USA.

>> No.30275135

If its numbers, why did the Mongols always win?

It's not numbers. Look at Alesia.

Also, villains. Easy. Carthaginian necromancers. German werewolves. Gaelic Druids. Scandinavian dragons. Irish Atlantians. Babylonian devil worshiping blood cults. Dacian vampires.

... Get it together son.

>> No.30275170

>They didn't have to steal all their myth and philosophy either.
Roman had it's own mythology, they were just really good at claiming that every other indo-european mythology was the same as theirs and equated foreigners gods to their own. They were also really good at adapting foreign culture and mythology into their own, such as Mithras, but that was more to keep peasants happy than anything.

>> No.30275175

>implying Jesus' psychedelic apocalyptic gnostic life philosophy has anything to do with that Roman junk that Paul invented

The Temple of God is in your heart, not in fucking Rome. And you certainly don't need to go to church on Sunday when you carry the Temple of God in your heart 24/7.

>> No.30275302

Why are the Romans always getting buttslammed by horse archers?

>> No.30275353

Because horse archers are overpowered. Everyone gets fucked with horse archers.

>> No.30275407

I think the last thing The Empire wants is a "good war". It's much better to face someone who's way behind technologically than someone who's got around your technological level.

Not that anyone's going to be invading the US anytime soon, mind you.

>> No.30275412

>Because horse archers are overpowered. Everyone gets fucked with horse archers.

Sword Sisters > horse archers
Plate + crossbows > Bullshit + shit bows

>> No.30275551

Explain Battle of Mohi then.

>> No.30275823

Warcraft did that first.

>> No.30275859

You know how the testeudo formation famously made everyone in it arrowproof?

>> No.30275889


> Halfling Legionnaires, auxialiries riding with blink dogs and griffins, clerics summoning solar lanters. More people, Slings, Master Race

>> No.30276670

Not necessarily, the British didn't want to invade the Zulus up until they started winning. Profit dictates whether The Empire wants to fight. Just compare how many wars the Roman Empire or the British Empire fought up until they started getting their shit kicked in economically.

>> No.30277442

>If its numbers, why did the Mongols always win?
Are you saying that horde constantly won against the armies that always have far more man than Genghis's army?

>It's not numbers. Look at Alesia.

>numbers doesn't always win
This is plausible, when one side has some strategical tool that the other side doesn't have.

When it is, say between two Roman legions with more or less same composition, it is numbers that will win.Of course if one commander didn't pull off a perfect strategy.

Going back to the original argument, I claimed they have been outnumbered ridiculously because at that age Huns were the perfect horse riders with deadly aim on horse.

You could not outmaneuver them, you could not take them into the melee range, you could only watch your army getting wiped.
Plus, they were the cruelest monsters that Europe ever seen with their scorching earth techniques, the men that stood before them was always demoralized before the battle even begun.

Now if the Persians pulled off an victory that shit, I hypothesize that Persians throw man until they were out of arrows and Persian corpses+their surroundings limited their maneuverability.Then they brought their main force and scored a victory.

To test the viability of this hypothesis, I need to know numbers of each side.

>> No.30277826

>Shouldn't Mongols be centaurs?

The mythical centaurs were based on the Greeks' first encounters with the Scythian horse archers. So yeah.

>> No.30277898

>Implying Jesus was at all psychedelic or gnostic
>Implying Paul was not an apostle

You're right, it is in your heart, and you don't HAVE to go to any church, but gathering with believers to worship is a good thing, and to learn under a preacher.

>Year of my Father's Rule 2014

...good one. I like this one.

>Giving unto Caesar what belongs to God

Well, its historically true; they converted to Christianity, it was the official religion. It IS a Roman religion

>> No.30277929

Which us funny cus the US are saints compared to most world powers, like the British or French.

>> No.30277960

>Are you saying that horde constantly won against the armies that always have far more man than Genghis's army?
Well... Yes? Not just Genghis, the direct successors too.

>> No.30278154

Hmm, interesting.
I just checked, and you are right.At least about the Europe.Then again my latter post is the explanation.Europe infantry sucked dicks at that time.

At Asia, they are almost never outnumbered more than 3-fold.

Why are Tartars such sluts?

>> No.30278232

That is one fucking villainous-ass speech and all this thread makes me want to do is alt-history leading Boudica's forces to triumph.

>> No.30278246

barbar pls. Rome may not have been great, but it was certainly better than anything the Celts did.

>> No.30278275

Naturally, given that they didn't have a technological head start and got stomped into the mud by those who did. I will bring down Rome in flames and teach these assholes the meaning of hubris.

>> No.30278320

Egyptians should be Drow, because their culture just seemed that foreign to the Romans.

>> No.30278583

Well by that logic, you could say that Christianity is also a British religion, or a Spanish religion.

>> No.30278892

Beautiful Celtic metalwork

And to get back on topic, if the Romans are halflings, shoudn't the Greeks be gnomes? Similar but better; technological innovators rather than thieves; far more tricksy and less willing to cooperate with people outside their own locality?

And, ultimately, if you were a halfling wouldn't you want to be a gnome?

>> No.30279701


Okay, so, emperor dragons, nobles and bureaucrats dragonborn, and peasants kobolds; maybe the Imperial Crown or the original Qin Imperial Seal transform your descendants into dragons or something, as there have been several emperors that were originally peasants.

But, that begs the question... What about situation like with Cao Cao and Emperor Xian where the emperor was a captive against his will? How did they keep a dragon locked up?

Or does the imperial dragon gets weaker as the state gets weaker?

>> No.30279894


A kobold taunting the imperial dragon before executing his wife?

>> No.30279897

Or how about meso-american Atlanteans.

Seriously, there were actually 19th century historians who believed that the Aztecs and Mayans were descended from Atlantis

>> No.30280217

I dunno, but it does sound like it could be fun for a Qin: Warring States game.

>> No.30281118

Pleb moar

>> No.30282970

Ba-dum tsss

>> No.30283084

No... no you can't.

>> No.30285418

They're not. Rome outlasted the parthians and the sassanids.

>> No.30285476

>You could not outmaneuver them, you could not take them into the melee range, you could only watch your army getting wiped.
Except huns also fought on foot, and always went to war with large contingents of germanic foot.

The simple fact is, flavius aetius DID beat them, and his entire coalition was made up of Germans and romans, all oh whom preferred close combat.

>I hypothesize that Persians throw man until they were out of arrow
Or they just shot them to death. The persian take on horse archer has them wearing armor and even armorial their horses. They win in a shoothout against nomads very easily.

>> No.30286277

> if you were a halfling wouldn't you want to be a gnome?
>Implying honest, clean-shaven Roman Halflings would want to be pederastic Greek Gnome tinkers with boar hair strapped to their faces.

>> No.30286357

Sounds more like dwarves, also both Greeks and dwarves were fond of beards weren't they?

>> No.30289854

No, Chinese are kobolds

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