/sci/ - Science & Math

I'm still waiting on this nigga

A WEEK OF FEASTS AND GAMES WILL BE HELD TO CELEBRATE SNX'S TRIUMPH!

NO OLDSPACE COMPANIES ARE ALLOWED TO ATTEND

TOMORROW, RIGHT BEFORE MIDNIGHT AT 11:53 PM EASTERN TIME, A ROCKET WILL LAUNCH IN THE FAR OFF LAND OF INDIA.

INDIA’S POLAR SATELLITE LAUNCH VEHICLE (PSLV), DESIGNATED PSLV-C51, WILL LAUNCH THE AMAZÔNIA 1 EARTH OBSERVATION SATELLITE FOR BRAZIL. THE BRAZILIAN-BUILT SPACECRAFT CARRIES AN OPTICAL CAMERA TO MONITOR ENVIRONMENTAL CONDITIONS, SUCH AS DEFORESTATION, IN THE AMAZON REGION. MULTIPLE SECONDARY PAYLOADS FROM PRIVATE INDIAN COMPANIES WILL ALSO BE ON THIS LAUNCH.

ON THE LAST DAY OF THE MONTH, A RUSSIAN SOYUZ ROCKET WILL LAUNCH THE FIRST ARKTIKA-M 1 SATELLITE FOR THE RUSSIAN GOVERNMENT.

FLYING IN HIGHLY ELLIPTICAL ORBITS, THE ARKTIKA-M SATELLITES PROVIDE METEOROLOGICAL OBSERVATIONS AND EMERGENCY COMMUNICATIONS OVER EARTH’S POLAR REGIONS.

ALSO ON THE 28TH, THE LONG DELAYED STARLINK 17 MISSION IS AGAIN SCHEDULED TO LAUNCH. HOWEVER, THE PRIESTS OF NEPTUNE SAY HIS MOOD IS UNCLEAR, AND FURTHER DELAYS MAY OCCUR.

THIS LAUNCH UPDATE WAS PROVIDED BY THE BORING COMPANY.
TRUE ROMAN HOLES! FOR TRUE ROMANS!

THE TEMPLE OF MARS HAS CONFIRMED THAT THE PERSEVERANCE ROVER HAS TOUCHED THE FACE OF THEIR GOD
A TRIUMPH WILL BE HELD FOR NASA AND ULA
SHELBY BULLYING WILL BE KEPT TO AN APPROPRIATE MINIMUM

TOMORROW EVENING, AT 11:42 PM EASTERN TIME, THE NEXT STARLINK LAUNCH IS SCHEDULED TO TAKE PLACE.

STARLINK WILL LAUNCH FROM SLC-40 AT CAPE CANAVERAL SPACE FORCE STATION IN FLORIDA

ALL CITIZENS ARE HEREBY ORDERED TO MAKE A SACRIFICE TO NEPTUNE FOR A SAFE JOURNEY AND FAVORABLE WEATHER.

THE JEWISH QUARTER OF THE CITY WILL ALSO BE EXPECTED TO COMPLY WITH THIS DECREE UNDER THREAT OF EXILE.

THIS LAUNCH UPDATE WAS PROVIDED BY THE BORING COMPANY.
TRUE ROMAN HOLES, FOR TRUE ROMANS!

THE TEMPLE OF MARS HAS ACCEPTED THE BURNT OFFERING OF STARSHIP SNIX IN EXCHANGE FOR A SAFE LANDING OF NASA'S PERSEVERANCE LANDER. THE ORACLES ARE UNCLEAR ON HOW MANY FURTHER OFFERINGS WILL BE REQUIRED TO PERFECT THE LANDING BURN MANEUVER.

THE ORACLE OF ARTEMIS HAS CHOSEN A FIREFLY AS THE NEXT MESSENGER TO THE LUNAR MARE TO COLLECT DATA IN PREPARATION FOR THE AS YET UNDEFINED FIRST HUMAN LANDING IN THAT REALM SINCE THE TEMPLE OF APOLLO WAS INFESTED WITH SWAMP RATS AND SHUT DOWN.

TONIGHT IN THE COLISEUM THE ESTEEMED CHAMPION GLADIATOR GAIUS THOMAS BRADY HAS DEFENDED HIS TITLE AND HONOR AGAINST UPSTART MAHOMUS AFRICANUS. CITIZENS ARE URGED TO BE WATCHFUL FOR RIOTS IN THE AFRICAN OR JUDEAN QUARTERS.

SENATOR SHELBY WILL RETIRE IN JANUARY OF 2023. THE TEMPLES OF VENUS, CERES, JUPITER, AND SATURN HAVE DECLARED FEAST DAYS.

TODAY'S NEWS IS BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE ORBITAL CRYOGEN MONGER'S GUILD. TRUE PROPELLANT DEPOTS, FOR TRUE AMERICANS.

TODAY IS TENTATIVELY SCHEDULED FOR A LAUNCH OF STARSHIP SNIX. THE CIVITAS OF BOCA CHICA HAS BEEN EVACUATED IN PREPARATION.

THE SECOND GREEN RUN OF THE MUCH MALIGNED AND DESPISED 'SLS' SHALL TAKE PLACE NO SOONER THAN THE END OF THE MONTH. IT IS AS YET UNCERTAIN OF WHICH YEAR THIS REFERS TO.

THE PRETENDERS TO THE ORBITAL THRONE, VIRGIN GALACTIC, ARE PROMISING A TEST IN MID-FEBRUARY.

LAUNCH THREAD FOR THE LAUNCH OF SNIX WILL BE PROVIDED BY GAIUS ANONYMOUS IN THE HOURS PRIOR TO LIFTOFF

BE AWARE
NO FURFAGS, JANNIES, OR UNCLEAN REDDITORS MAY ATTEND

THIS LAUNCH UPDATE WAS PROVIDED BY THE ANTIPODEAN GUILD
TRVE ROMAN SHITPOSTS FOR TRUE ROMANS

TOMORROW, AT 0641 EASTERN TIME, A STARLINK LAUNCH WILL TAKE PLACE FROM THE HISTORIC LC-39A LAUNCH SITE

THIS WILL BE THE 18TH STARLINK LAUNCH TO DATE, AND THE FIRST ROCKET LAUNCH OF THE NEW MONTH

LAUNCH THREAD WILL BE PROVIDED BY GAIUS ANONYMOUS IN THE HOURS PRIOR TO LIFTOFF

BE AWARE
NO FURFAGS, JANNIES, OR UNCLEAN REDDITORS MAY ATTEND

THIS LAUNCH UPDATE WAS PROVIDED BY GAMESTOP
POWER TO THE PLAYERS

>>12635519
>Neutral reporting don't exist anymore
I beg to differ.