/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.7530408]

Post a 1 star goodreads review of your favourite book.

[Anonymous No.7530442]

>>7530408
>when women meet literature

[Anonymous No.7530443]

It's usually just people calling the book boring, nothing that interesting IMO.

[Anonymous No.7530445]

>>7530408
http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/6050831?book_show_action=false&from_review_page=1

I suffered through about 60 pages, and finally put it down. I very rarely ever leave a book unfinished.

The author narrates and introduces us to Yossarian, who does not want to fly in the war. I get that. I get the whole catch 22 scenerio... You have to be insane to fly the plane. If you can get a dr to say you are insane, you wont have to fly. But in order to tell a dr that you are insane, this actually means you are sane. So you must continue to fly... which makes you insane. blah blah blah.

What I couldnt get past was the author's constant bouts of Attention Deficet Disorder.... He went off on tangents, introducing a new character seemingly every paragraph, and seemed to lose his train of thought only to regain it 2 pages later.

I couldnt take all the jumping around, and was completely lost the whole time... at times rereading the prior page thinking I missed some important tie-in somewhere....

Am I the only one on this planet who is asking myself what heck everyone was smoking when they read this book and actually enjoyed it?

[Anonymous No.7530448]

[Anonymous No.7530453]

>>7530448
holy god how did you fuck up that screenshot

[Anonymous No.7530459]

>>7530453
I was zoomed out. You can still read it fine.

[Anonymous No.7530462]

>>7530448
This is more like teensreadbooks.png, IMO

[Anonymous No.7530463]

>>7530408
At least she finished it. I think that gives her the right to hate the book.

[Anonymous No.7530466]

Not 1-star reviews, but I like posting this pic in goodreads review threads

[Anonymous No.7530472]

Here is a review by Mitchel: http://www.goodreads.com/review/show/140585554

[Anonymous No.7530474]

>>7530408
>pic related response

[Anonymous No.7530475]

[Anonymous No.7530479]

>>7530474
>Dr. Benyamin Shekelbergstein

[Anonymous No.7530486]

>>7530408
>shelves
>audio

[Anonymous No.7530491]

[Anonymous No.7530497]

[Anonymous No.7530503]

>>7530486
>she didn't even read it

I knew there was something dodgy going on here.

[Anonymous No.7530506]

ALL OF IT TRIGGERED ME TBQH

[Anonymous No.7530517]

>>7530497
I actually felt like this on some parts on the Garcia Madero's intro.
But it improved a lot a few pages later, just before shit hit the fan.

[Anonymous No.7530546]

[Anonymous No.7530550]

>>7530506
mostly women.
Is /pol/ correct?

Or maybe odness are more autism-driven behavior are more common on men. Maybe....

[Anonymous No.7530558]

She got like 20 pages away from when the priest's part of the book is over... the ADD crippled cunt.

[Anonymous No.7530569]

>>7530475
I always figured aurelius' stoicism was a coping method for being surrounded by idiots and not something he lived and breathed.

[Anonymous No.7530574]

>skimming through the book

[Anonymous No.7530577]

>Woman said Book of the new Sun is too dry, hard to understand and "boring" and that Severian is too serious and never "jokes around"
>women

Never again will I speak to any female of any specie about literature.

[Anonymous No.7530594]

>book is depressing won't read

No wonder depression is such popular nowadays. People just can't deal with sadness and will take pills for anything.
Meanwhile truly depressed people sometimes forgo treatment because they can't even seek help.

[Anonymous No.7530621]

>>7530408
Man... War and Peace sounds awesome.

[Anonymous No.7530632]

>>7530445
Thanks, Lori

[Anonymous No.7530637]

>>7530497
Triggered 2bh

[Anonymous No.7530641]

>>7530448
>tiem
>gettign

[Anonymous No.7530645]

>>7530641
>reddit

[Anonymous No.7530654]

>>7530479
are you antisemitic? why is the name worth mentioning? how ignorant.

[Anonymous No.7530657]

Women meet Garden of Eden.

[Anonymous No.7530665]

Lol, guess this thread just proves that females are only good for sucking dick, am I right fellas????

[Anonymous No.7530668]

All of these classics were selected as such by the purveying academics of the era. Which were all men. Not a surprise women dislike them and don't understand them right? Or are they just all stupid and smart women like the same thing smart men do.

[Anonymous No.7530669]

>>7530665
how closed minded of you. women are good at many other things like:

sex, household chores, taking orders, etc.

[Anonymous No.7530670]

>>7530665
are you cute? If yes, want to start with mine?

[Anonymous No.7530671]

>>7530665
I'm pretty sure a man would be better at that too. Any bisexuals in this thread are free to correct me if I'm wrong.

[Anonymous No.7530672]

>>7530654
>are you antisemitic?
>on 4chan

[Anonymous No.7530673]

>>7530669
Sorry... guess I was being a bit of a misogynist there. Girls are also good at those things sometimes.

[Anonymous No.7530675]

>>7530668
You're assuming smart women exist.. I don't think there has ever been a female in the history of humanity who has ever liked any of the books mentioned in this thread. They're just too stupid, their brains arne't big enough, etc..

[Anonymous No.7530679]

>>7530669
>sex, household chores, taking orders, etc.

Men are better at all of these.

[Anonymous No.7530680]

>>7530679
Good point. Maybe it's time we deal with the female problem once and for all #femicide2016

[Anonymous No.7530684]

https://twitter.com/search?q=%23femicide2016

[Anonymous No.7530689]

>>7530679
so...2016 and beyond will be the future of traps?

[Anonymous No.7530694]

>>7530689
The future of homolove... Hopefully, if our plans succeed.

[Anonymous No.7530771]

>>7530448
jesus fuck

[Anonymous No.7530785]

>>7530445
>his favorite book is catch 22

>>>/reddit/

[Anonymous No.7530800]

>>7530506
>Victorian Russian lit

[Anonymous No.7530852]

I Like to think Ryan was actually saved from all further existential crisis's by this book, despite him knowing what it is trying to do.

There is another one that just says "Fuck Pessoa" which I thought could have it's prose improved.

[Anonymous No.7531932]

>>7530475
I want to sound so patrician too, help me bros.

[Anonymous No.7531983]

>>7530506
>as a devoted nabokovian

[Anonymous No.7532154]

[Anonymous No.7532225]

>>7530671
girls lips' are softer.

[Anonymous No.7532236]

>>7532154
I'm mad, sad, and full of laughter all at the same time.

[Anonymous No.7532268]

>>7532154
What an idiot, people like him just piss me off.

[Anonymous No.7532298]

>>7530408
Absolutely savage.

[Anonymous No.7532305]

>>7530668
This is some pretty good quality bait. Kudos

[Anonymous No.7532321]

>>7530408
Warning: Plot spoilers in this review.

Also, I forgot to check my privilege :(.

[Anonymous No.7532387]

>>7532321
behead those who insult stoner

[Anonymous No.7532415]

>>7532321
>privilege
literally stopped reading there

[Anonymous No.7532445]

>>7532415
>literally
As oposed to figuratively?

[Anonymous No.7532447]

Jamie is a stupid faggot.

[Anonymous No.7532449]

>>7532445
Yes. If you can not comprehend that I'm sorry to say you're developmentally delayed.

[Anonymous No.7532453]

>>7530546
I couldn't make it through that first paragraph. Is he actually real? Do people like that exist?

[Anonymous No.7532460]

[Anonymous No.7532462]

>>7532453
I'm afraid so. Some people just can't grasp abstract art. Even if is cubism, which is relatively tame.

[Anonymous No.7532467]

Trial btw

[Anonymous No.7532473]

>>7532321
How do you miss the point that much?

[Anonymous No.7532509]

>>7532473
Social justice merchants only see what suits their agenda because their brains are rotten with ideology

[Anonymous No.7532524]

>>7532509
So like /lit/ when they fail to promote books written by minorities? Books that only serve their masculine agenda.

[Anonymous No.7532529]

>women

[Anonymous No.7532544]

This was posted on /lit/ before but really irritates me for what it represents. Self hating jap cuck writes a full a full autistic essay on the "evil" of Mishimas "aesthetics". Googling OP brings up an American raised uni academic in Japan/ obcessed with promoting Korean culture in Japan

[Anonymous No.7532547]

>>7530408

[Anonymous No.7532548]

>>7532544
http://www.amazon.com/gp/customer-reviews/R3EIVQJ3DY4AS5/ref=cm_cr_pr_rvw_ttl?ie=UTF8&ASIN=0679752706

Whoops, heres link, it's Temple of the Golden Pavillion

[Anonymous No.7532571]

>>7530408

[Anonymous No.7532594]

>>7532524
If an author is good, they won't need to be artificially "promoted". I don't give a shit about the ethnicity of an author, I just want high quality literature. Also, you are a racist and a sexist.

ps.
>minorities
>masculine
Women are 51% of the population in most countries.

[Anonymous No.7532599]

>>7532460
This is great, thank you for sharing.

[Anonymous No.7532604]

>>7532547
>>7532467
>>7532298
>>7530594
>>7530574
>>7530558
>>7530546
>>7530506
>>7530497

Why doesn't anyone on these threads ever list the fucking book they love? The dumb things people say are only funny when I have some context.

[Anonymous No.7532606]

>>7532571
>lots of Hemingway Southern Hemisphere fun in Cuba

[Anonymous No.7532608]

>>7532467
> could make head or tails of it
> could make
> could

Wow, it's like, how do these motherfuckers know how to read if they don't know what they're writing

[Anonymous No.7532609]

>>7532524
>>7532594
Tumblrina blown the fuck out

>>>/reddit/

[Anonymous No.7532624]

>>7532594
Women are a minority in discourse because institutions run by men only promote works that fit their worldview.

[Anonymous No.7532625]

>>7532624

[Anonymous No.7532633]

[Anonymous No.7532645]

>>7532625
>Hegemonic institutions don't exist, we are all treated equally

I found your problem, but I can't resolve it. That's up to you.

[Anonymous No.7532669]

>>7532604
>not inferring which books they are talking about from the over abundant context
Don't come here for memes if you don't have any background son.

[Anonymous No.7532687]

>>7532645
"You're right, they're biased towards women now.... M'lady."

With one hand, I reach to tip my trilby in your general direction and slowly turn to exit the stage.

#redpill #mgtow #notallmen

[Anonymous No.7532709]

I picked the best 1 star review

[Anonymous No.7532769]

Can anyone tell me how good is Rabassa's translation of Hopscotch?

[Anonymous No.7532786]

>>7532669
yeah the one i posted literally has the name of the book mentioned in the review. ill give you a hint: BIG BLACK PLOT DEVICES

[Anonymous No.7532791]

>>7532604
Git fucking gud and read more, faggot.

[Anonymous No.7532794]

>>7532687
>college graduates are a proxy for power structures

Could one man be more wrong?

[Anonymous No.7532977]

[Anonymous No.7533080]

[Anonymous No.7533100]

>>7533080
tfw the reviewer is right

[Anonymous No.7533115]

>>7532321
>Path of least resistance

It's the third time I've seen this being used to describe Stoner even though it doesn't apply at all

[Anonymous No.7533129]

>>7532321
Just to add: this one isn't half as enfuriating as that retard with the tongue out who went with the groundbreaking "I dislike it because the fans like it too much"

[Anonymous No.7533314]

>>7532604
Many of the pictures have the name of the book as the file name.
(Book of Disquiiet.png / germinal_zola.png / AbsalomAbsalom.png / savagedetectives.png / meditationsAurelius.png and so on

[Anonymous No.7533342]

Under The Volcano. She could not emphasise with poor, poor dying white people.

[Anonymous No.7533393]

>>7532447
He's right tho and Jamie is an Academic

[Anonymous No.7533402]

>>7533342
How the hell did white become synonymous with bad? If something is "white" no explanation for why it is bad is needed

Motherfuckers be like, "Typical white thing to do"

I'm a little triggered

[Anonymous No.7533404]

>>7530408

>Don't be as dumb as me.

I couldn't if I tried babe.

[Anonymous No.7533452]

>>7532447

>It's not that I don't get it
>Lifts themes directly from sparknotes

[Anonymous No.7533468]

>>7533342
try listening to/reading POC and realize how easy you guys have it

[Anonymous No.7533490]

>>7530408
Should your goodreads rating be normally distributed?

[Anonymous No.7533491]

>>7532467
isn't Kafka's Trail about 200 pages? How does that take her a month to read?

[Anonymous No.7533498]

>>7533490
>lit
>maths

[Anonymous No.7533503]

1 star I shouldn't blame John Williams for my rising blood pressure because in fact YOU are to blame. Yes, you. Perhaps not individually, but in the general sense of Goodreads voters and reviewers, of which you are presumably a constituent. As of this moment, Stoner has an average rating of 4.39 stars out of five on the basis of 531 Goodreader ratings. This is a remarkable score, to be sure, but as with many averages, it is complete and utter bullshit -- obviously contaminated by the spurious opinions of the ardent fans of graceless, tedious prose. You know who you are.

Let's parse the data, shall we? 459 people gave this turd four or five stars; whilst only eleven people were courageous enough to call a spade a spade and, against the grain of general opinion, to award it only one or two stars. I consider these eleven people heroes. You and your ilk can eulogize the armed forces, the pigs, the schlubby, mustachioed rescue workers, with your tearful montages of wars, standoffs, and celebrity house fires, all assembled to the reactionary tunes of 3 Doors Down or Nickelback; I prefer a subtler form of heroism -- you know, the lone voice who amid the Russophilic, ostentatiously intellectual acclaim for Bulgakov's The Master and Margarita dares to raise an eyebrow at this dry Goethe wannabe...

I therefore am a great hero because, fighting the insidious cabal of 'respectable' opinion, I offer my head to the rabble in order to warn you what a lifeless stinkbomb Stoner is. John Williams, I suspect, was an author who was better suited to actuarial work or fumigating. Something more prosaic. His main problem is that he wants desperately to tell you everything. He's adamant that you know this or that about his main character William Stoner's psychological make-up, habits, and proclivities, but unfortunately he'd rather put Mr. Stoner behind a glass wall at the zoo and recite a bunch of vague adjectives and banal activities relevant to him. In placing Stoner in the zoo and preparing a dry summation about him, he deprives Stoner of life, abbreviates him into a concept...

[Anonymous No.7533528]

>>7533490
Not if you stick to reading good literature

[Anonymous No.7533571]

>>7533468
you're baits are getting weaker by the minute

[Anonymous No.7533597]

>>7532321
Actually made me mad

[Anonymous No.7533645]

>>7533490
Don't you think it's a bit perverse and egocentric? I certainly do, cause I felt like an unwashed pig when I used to doctor my rateyourmusic ratings to fit the curve.

[Anonymous No.7533649]

>>7532321
racism and classes (hierarchies) are natural orders and prejudices within every existing society that self regulates and safe guards standards and cohesion. To actually pinpoint these things as negatives, you are in fact anti culture. Privilege? How is a white man privileged in a white society?

[Anonymous No.7533737]

>>7530445
I couldn't finish it either. I was planning on trying to read it again and see if I can "get it". The cast of characters seemed to be endless. At times the story seemed to be going into interesting places, but being that the story seemed to have no chronological order, I got lost and had to wait for a bunch of other chapters(which introduced 10+ characters each) to get to a storyline I was interested in.

[Anonymous No.7533739]

[Anonymous No.7533890]

[Anonymous No.7533972]

>>7533468
I don't know, we did have 2 world wars mostly between each other as well as fascism... It's not like we do onto other race worse than we also did with each other.

[Anonymous No.7533992]

>You know what ruined this book for me? i'll tell you. it was jack gladney. and his wife, babette, whose breasts he always seemed to be between. babette. baba. really? does that need to be anyone's name? those two killed the entire experience that could have been white noise. i hated them. they were annoying together, they were annoying apart. the obsession with death and the fear of one's own mortality, his brilliant remarks on consumerism never resonated with me. is this a result of some sort of generational divide? i don't know, i guess i don't really care to know. i tried hard to figure out what was it about this novel that spoke to people so. but at the end of the day jack, babette, and their relationship sucked any and all the meaning out of the book. i'm going to try my delillo luck again with cosmopolis.

This woman's total lack of understanding was funny to me, but the real punchline here is the cosmopolis part. Holy jesus.

[Anonymous No.7534002]

>>7530408
it doesn't have any

[Anonymous No.7534040]

Autism speaks

[Anonymous No.7534099]

>>7534040
It's amazing someone can get so emotional over a book. I think the author should be happy they've managed to create such a response.

[Anonymous No.7534121]

>>7534040
good book desu

[Anonymous No.7534136]

Catch-22

[Anonymous No.7534158]

>>7532460
howdy kate

[Anonymous No.7534171]

Cien Años de Soledad

[Anonymous No.7534209]

muh soggynee

[Anonymous No.7534233]

>>7532467
> I opted to read this because I feel like a well-educated adult so read all books that are part of the cultural lexicon

[Anonymous No.7534240]

>>7533890
Blood Meridian?

[Anonymous No.7534246]

>>7532460
SMART PEOPLE COMEDY: Take actual comedy, subtract 90% of the obligation to have a funny punchline, add accessible references to ~High Culture~

>hey i'm a tumblr artist named kate beaton i'll draw [kafka/joyce/plato/milton] being silly and it'll have punctuationless dialogue like this and the technically jokeless but whimsical silliness will revolve around something really accessible and obvious that everyone can recognise from the one thing they were forced to learn about this famous author in high school lol milton i'm blind i can't see ur butt XDddd now post it in a /lit/ humor thread or correctively rape me until i stop clogging the internet with pretentious garbage for MA students at the university of arizona to post on their facebook and twitter where they call themselves a "scholar" (and then rape them too)

[Anonymous No.7534257]

'Pale Fire' Vladimir Nabokov

[Anonymous No.7534260]

>>7530408
Man I love that book.

[Anonymous No.7534277]

I swear the majority of women are fucking retarded

[Anonymous No.7534290]

The Rings of Saturn

[Anonymous No.7534295]

Women are the only ones who read books anyway.

[Anonymous No.7534323]

>>7534257
"GENUINE"

NOVOKOV"

"CLASSICISTS"

You got me. 10/10

[Anonymous No.7534332]

[Anonymous No.7534354]

>>7530546
Oh God, I remember seeing this review when I was rating Absolom Absolom after reading it myself. It's one of the most astonishingly terrible things I've ever read. Even if I agreed that the book was bad, it would STILL be a terrible review.

[Anonymous No.7534403]

>>7530408

[Anonymous No.7534419]

>>7534403
>nothing happens accept

Curiously I've never seen this kind of word switch before

[Anonymous No.7534443]

>Trigger Warning: Female Antagonists

[Anonymous No.7534454]

>>7534403
Do Now read this book. hehehe

[Anonymous No.7534485]

book is Dune

[Anonymous No.7534493]

>>7534485
>everyone is addicted to Cinnamon

Kekked

[Anonymous No.7534495]

>>7534485
Dune IS shit

[Anonymous No.7534496]

[Anonymous No.7534501]

>>7534485
For real, that's your favorite book? You should not be at all surprised if /lit/ shits on you for that.

[Anonymous No.7534503]

>>7530408
Reviews for Don Quixote.

>One person listens to the audiobook
>someone prefers it in dinner-theatre
>another considers a cost-benefit analysis in order to justify not reading
>praying that the fourth person is trolling, but they probably aren't

I will never consider suicide again after reading these reviews, because I'm now completely convinced that my life is worth something by comparison.

[Anonymous No.7534505]

>>7530408

[Anonymous No.7534506]

>>7534501
Nah, it's not my favorite, just something that I'm reading right now
Why? What's wrong with it?

[Anonymous No.7534509]

>>7534505
>almost as bad as the Bible
shit, cat

[Anonymous No.7534510]

>>7533490
Why the fuck would they be you imbecile

[Anonymous No.7534519]

>>7530785
1. what an utterly boring and unoriginal response, completely lacking of any art at all. shame on you.
2. you should be aware by now that these meme threads may say 'favorite' but everyone practically ignores that word.

[Anonymous No.7534544]

>>7534506
Can't speak for /lit/, but I feel that it's an enchanting work of sci-fi but doesn't read like literature to me. The book is sustained by the richness of the world that Herbert creates and by the movement of the plot. Other than that it doesn't have much going for it. Nothing is at stake in the book that hasn't been dealt with better elsewhere. I was also never impressed by the style of the prose, but it's not without it's small charms.

[Anonymous No.7534554]

>>7533491
>Kafka's Trail

Worst camping trip ever.

[Anonymous No.7534555]

>>7534554
I had a kek and a quarter

[Anonymous No.7534556]

>>7534503
The fourth review is so fucking hilarious.
>I'm just not into all those chivalry romance novels
>feels dated

[Anonymous No.7534559]

>>7530448
>tfw Ted 'FEDexecution' Kaczinsky will never letter bomb retarded goodreads reviewers

[Anonymous No.7534563]

>>7534559
actually though do you have a reaction face for this

[Anonymous No.7534570]

>>7534563

[Anonymous No.7534576]

A dead white European male was teaching a class on English literature, known tool of imperialist oppression.
“Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship King Leopold II, greatest monarch the world has ever known, even greater than James Monroe!”

At this moment, a black, female, transgendered, cis-hetero-homoflexible Latino transvestite man who has over 20,000 Tweets and 12,000 Tumblr posts stood up and held up an novel.

“What is this book?”

The professor smirked oppressively and smugly replied “Heart of Darkness, by Polish-British writer Joseph Conrad, an intelligent and insightful study of the primitive mind of the African peoples.”

“Wrong. The book is a racist and oppressive piece of propaganda designed to dehumanize the proud peoples of the African continent. Conrad is a bigot. If the book truly had merit as you claimed, Oprah would’ve reviewed it on her show already.”

The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and Iron Cross. He stormed out of the room crying those DWEM crocodile tears.

The students applauded and all registered Marxist that day and accepted Martin Luther King Jr. as their lord and savior. An okapi pounced into the room and stood next to a south-up map centered around Africa. The students joined hand in hand and sang Toto’s Africa several times, and Jesse Jackson, king of all black people, showed up to enact affirmative action across the country.

The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of a giant black nigger dick up his ass was tossed into the Sahara desert for all eternity.

That student’s name? Chinua Achebe.

Hakuna Matata

[Anonymous No.7534582]

>>7534576
fuck that book is like 10 pages long how do they struggle with it are they goldfish?

[Anonymous No.7534623]

>>7530672
speak for yourself bud

[Anonymous No.7534631]

>>7534576
>literally outright says "do not read it because it's racist"
>"chinua achebe says do not read heart of darkness"

[Anonymous No.7534653]

>>7534576
Jesus Heart of Darkness came out in motherfucking 1899. Colonialism was still in full swing and that novel is one of the first to even consider it critically. Find me any other novel before the 20th century with the level of perceptiveness that it has about colonialism in Congo or all of Africa. Yes, Chinua Achebe gives Conrad harsh criticism but decades of ink have been spilled debating the merits and faults of Heart of Darkness.

>it haunts me 9 years later
Really? Bitch never even finished it.

[Anonymous No.7534659]

>>7530675
3/10

[Anonymous No.7534669]

I read the 1 star reviews for a couple of my favorite books and now my night is ruined. It's just so goddamn frustrating when dumb fucking people read a book that requires more intelligence to understand than they had to apply to fucking Harry Potter. Then they don't understand it or "get" the book and shit all over it with a review more rife with spelling mistakes and grammar errors than a school dumpster after kindergarten creative writing time. Jesus. Just read the shit for Gravity's Rainbow, Blood Meridian, Infinite Jest...

[Anonymous No.7534671]

>>7533080
He's right though

[Anonymous No.7534682]

>>7534503
LOL i am #4
i stand by what i said. the allusions to the old romance stories were tiring and yes, dated. i don't remember much else except that i had to keep on re-reading the same sentence over and over, this occurred on multiple pages. the book wasn't for me.

glad i can help you find worth in your life, anon!

>>7534556
glad i made you laugh, 2nd anon!

[Anonymous No.7534693]

>>7530668
Smart people like the same stuff other smart people like, generally. If you didn't like or understand a novel that is internationally regarded as brilliant, a classic, 9.9/10 it's because you're too dumb for the material. This is true 100% of the time. Again: You are too dumb for the material.

[Anonymous No.7534748]

>>7534246
here's your (You)

[Anonymous No.7534770]

[Anonymous No.7534772]

These threads are quite cringeworthy.

You lot are literally trying to make yourselves feel better about how non-plebian or common your taste in literature is.

"Oh look at these foolish fools, let us all implicitly circle jerk on how they can't understand art! HAHAHA! WE ARE SO MUCH BETTER".

Get over yourselves guys, most of you aren't going to grow up to be successful in your eyes, mainly because you've set unrealistic expectations by trying to distance yourself from any group of people that are susceptible to criticisms from elites (a highly selective club, unless you're from an ivy league college right now the chances of your membership are very slim, and are decently slim even if you are).

[Anonymous No.7534779]

>>7534772
In other words, fucking hipsters.

[Anonymous No.7534784]

>>7534779
>>7534772
butthurt plebs detected

[Anonymous No.7534787]

>>7532447
I'm a filthy pleb who hasn't read Moby Dick. Would /lit/ recommend it unironically?

[Anonymous No.7534789]

>>7534772
>decently slim even if you are
You've got an aristocracy delusion. Stop seeing the 21st century through 19th century goggles.

[Anonymous No.7534790]

>>7532447
actually pretty good

[Anonymous No.7534792]

>>7534772
Well we ARE better, so thanks. But as for the rest of your post I gather you, yourself, are too pleb-tier to read anything more complicated than The Hunger Games so I wouldn't expect you to understand. Peasant.

[Anonymous No.7534796]

>>7534772
But I'm already part of the elite.

I'm 19 years old.

I am handsome, smart, athletic and virile.

I have a novel that is in it's final editing stage, and a creative writing professor at my college has read the first draft and thinks it's saleable.

I have a girlfriend who is confident, articulate, playful and spontaneous.

I have a small group of interesting friends from different social and academic backgrounds, and I also have many other acquaintances who see me as a reliable source of humour and good company.

Both my parents are alive and in good health.

I have no regrets.

I have already experienced three existential crises, the latter of which was described as having the depth and profundity of a man twice my age.

I am a passionate lover, a sharp thinker, and a trader of witty repartee.

I am not self-pitying, meek or needlessly humble.

I will live a good life at your expense.

[Anonymous No.7534797]

>>7534772

[Anonymous No.7534800]

>>7534784
No, I'm not annoyed honestly.

I genuinely hope you let cope with your mid-life crisis well.

The suicidal ones aren't the ones sad about gfs, that's a realistic aspiration.

The suicidal ones are the ones desperate to be geniuses and pioneers, hence the higher rate of suicide in academia compared to the general population.

You would know what I'm talking about if you ever get into a top-notch grad programme in any discipline.

People go through an extreme crisis of identity in first-year gradschool.

[Anonymous No.7534801]

>>7534787
No. I only read that to brag about it.

[Anonymous No.7534802]

>>7534796
Existential crises are different from mid-life crises.

I hope you do, but I doubt you will.

[Anonymous No.7534803]

>>7534801
modern /lit/, everyone

[Anonymous No.7534805]

>>7534796
Very well placed meme. Fantastically memed, sir.

[Anonymous No.7534816]

>>7534805
>>7534802

The amount of criticism this meme gets is a testament to the toxicity of this board.

[Anonymous No.7534822]

>>7534772
Good thing I'm already on the fast track then. I literally can't express how much better my life has been since I attended Oxford. I went to a state school and gradually became the stereotypical moody, withdrawn sensitive type who both despises the quality of his immediate culture and feels a weird pride for having been raised in a sort of anti-intellectual and brutal environment. I was all set to take my Russell Group humanities BA and spend my life working as an anonymous, insecure wageslave forever thankful of being offered a job and forever too insecure to pursue my creative ambitions. The chip on my shoulder had become something of a wedge, and I felt too out of place regardless of my environment, too resentful and bitter to even attempt to make it in the artistic world. Then I finally applied for Oxford and got in to study an English MA, with reassurance that should I work hard enough a career in academia or within one of Oxford's affiliated companies would be almost guaranteed. I turned up as apprehensive as usual, and the first few days were spent regretting my decision and desperately feigning a cultured personality. But then I realized that the people there were just interesting and that the snobbery and exclusivity I had anticipated was just a myth borne out of my working class upbringing. I've since graduated, having spend the year dining in grand halls with groups of interesting people, dating several girls (one of whom, a petite Russian whose family traces back to the aristocracy, is now my fiancee). I work four days a week at a publishing company and earn £38k a year. I regularly meet up with friends from my college and visit Oxford for nights out and for meetings with my professors. The Martin Eden-esque novel I have been writing for two years has been selected for publication at a major British publishing house and, honestly, I could not have imagined a few years ago how great life could be. I come on /lit/ and see how pathetic you all are and just shake my head and chuckle. If I saw you guys on the street I would of course throw you a penny or discuss Bukowski or whatever "realist" writers you enjoy, but ultimately I would be able to tell within ten seconds if you're an Oxbridge grad and would dismiss you as a potential source of good company if you are not. I never thought I'd know what it was like to be objectively better than somebody else, for the value of my existence to be superior to the value of a stranger's, but now I do and I've never been happier. People are awed by power and prestige. All I need to do is mention the university I attended (if only for a year) and they immediately begin to hunch and look at their feet because they know they are in the presence of greatness.

[Anonymous No.7534829]

>>7534803
And it wasn't worth it. I mean, a couple of times I got to brag about it after someone else bragged about which was fun because I spoke their thunder - but other than college professors and bragging rights enthusiasts no one gives a shit about that book.

[Anonymous No.7534832]

>>7534822
>tfw rejected from oxford recently

[Anonymous No.7534834]

>>7534789
>You've got an aristocracy delusion.

Filthy inversion of morals?
Are you honestly deluded enough to think the average Ivy Leaguer doesn't have more intelligence and all around competence then someone from another mediocre college, therefore having the ability to be more successful in the field of his choice?

Don't convince yourself the club of elites, defined in conventional terms (money, fame, bitches, intelligence) is anything except what it is.

Yes there are countless examples of dullards from rich families who got in to Cornell etc because of their wealth and "pull" but they are the exceptions, not the norm.

[Anonymous No.7534837]

>>7530491

It's like very few people actually understand that all the Russian literature that is popular and prominent in the United States is saturated in satire.

[Anonymous No.7534840]

>>7534822
Is this a meme, or is this guy for real?

[Anonymous No.7534842]

>>7534832

Let's be honest, you never had a chance.

It's okay, you'll do fine come give us a hug, remember that last scene from Whiplash?

You'll be how the kid turned out if he stayed there crying in his father's arms! :)

[Anonymous No.7534848]

>>7534803
Yeah, plus the only time anyone gives a shit is if they're trying to make themselves stand out by bragging about having read it - thinking no one else there had - and I get to steal that thunder from them. But those opportunities are rare and no one else gives a shit.

[Anonymous No.7534852]

>>7534840
>>7534822

If it's the former:
>the snobbery and exclusivity I had anticipated was just a myth borne out of my working class upbringing
>I come on /lit/ and see how pathetic you all are and just shake my head and chuckle. If I saw you guys on the street I would of course throw you a penny or discuss Bukowski or whatever "realist" writers you enjoy, but ultimately I would be able to tell within ten seconds if you're an Oxbridge grad and would dismiss you as a potential source of good company if you are not. I never thought I'd know what it was like to be objectively better than somebody else, for the value of my existence to be superior to the value of a stranger's, but now I do and I've never been happier. People are awed by power and prestige. All I need to do is mention the university I attended (if only for a year) and they immediately begin to hunch and look at their feet because they know they are in the presence of greatness.

What?

If it's the latter, that's perhaps one of the most well crafted, toxic, posts I have ever seen.
The skill with which you're able to cash in on people's insecurities makes me wonder if you're honestly an Oxbridge or Ivy grad!

9/10, you're objectively superior.

[Anonymous No.7534862]

>>7534787
>tfw had to read abridged versions in elementary, middle, and high school
>tfw living in the city where the book begins
It's a good book. I'm not sure why people dislike it. However, It does meander at times.

[Anonymous No.7534867]

>>7534842
>I also failed at achieving my goals, now I'm unhappy so you will be too
:)

[Anonymous No.7534870]

>>7534822
>>7534832

[Anonymous No.7534872]

>>7534852
its a meme you dip

[Anonymous No.7534881]

>>7530448
The book is so straight forward, and it's pretty fucking obvious that "The Count of Monte Cristo" is Edmond Dantes. Wouldn't the fucking title and all of the fucking foreshadowing tip you off?

[Anonymous No.7534894]

>>7534837
Is Crime and Punishment full of satire? I just read it last month and didn't pick up on it. Sofia maybe? It didn't seem very satirical.

[Anonymous No.7534895]

>>7534881
i personally like to think that she just read an abridged version, which would be understandably confusing compared to the unabridged.

it soothes my triggers to try to give the benefit of the doubt.

[Anonymous No.7534897]

>>7534894
it probably is. the problem is that russians just arent fucking funny.

[Anonymous No.7534901]

>>7530558
>tfw no one you know will ever know the joy of reading Les Miserables and its beautiful story
>tfw no one even reads books, especially not giant books

[Anonymous No.7534918]

>>7530408
Who the fuck is Ellen?
Also what a stupid cunt.

[Anonymous No.7534933]

>>7534772
>>7534772
I grew up in something that's one step up from a complete ghetto. I made it to an Ivy League school on the back of a combination of affirmative action and an athletic scholarship.

My classmates were all your traditional, blue blood type elites. My professors were the leading experts of their fields.

Every single one of them wanted nothing more than to be shown the base and degenerate aspects of society, and to experience it through whatever avenue possible. This includes emotional, intellectual, and physical. I'm talking humiliation and abuse - in bed and out of bed.

(I'm a faggot in case you haven't figured this out yet. I know you guys suck at reading comprehension.)

One of my teammates, an otherwise proper, respectable, and charismatic white boy had the biggest orgasm of his life (or so he tells me) from having a $10,000 bottle of wine poured over him while I fucked him. Another one specifically requested I whip him with his violin bow. Many more want to experience prison rape or some other comparable scenario in the bedroom. I had a professor suck me off in his office while specifically requesting I shout verbal abuse relating to the emptiness and uselessness of his particular field of study. My experience is not at all uncommon from what I hear.

Your so-called "elites" just want to be treated like crap by ghetto filth. Next time you meet up with an Ivy grad, just remember there's a good chance the same mouth that's speaking eloquently about politics, culture, or whatever other topic is probably the same mouth that sucked big black cock the night before.

[Anonymous No.7534977]

>>7530448
>"Dantes transition from sweet and caring to vengeful and deceitful was rushed and unclear"

>rushed
>Dantes spends 14 years in prison and a further 10 years plotting
>unclear
>Dantes literally says things to the effect of "I will find the will to live just to have my revenge"

I struggle to imagine how much more clear the story could be. How can someone be this stupid.

[Anonymous No.7534985]

>>7534576
>Very humanity of black people is called into question
Almost like she didn't understand what Conrad was trying to say.

[Anonymous No.7534994]

>>7532298
Completely agree with this. What a piece of shit book.

[Anonymous No.7534998]

>>7532321
Despite triggering most of lit, he's pretty much right. Stoner was a pussy bitch of the lowest regard. Hard to find any real tragedy in this "intellectual" chucklefuck's masturbatory ventures.

[Anonymous No.7535001]

>>7534985
its nice to see someone saved an image I made

[Anonymous No.7535004]

>>7534933
Where's the copypaste from? Equally hot and pathetic.
I went to an Ivy too, and I highly doubt and love this post.

[Anonymous No.7535019]

>>7530408
Damn
This makes me want to read the book desu

[Anonymous No.7535041]

>>7534209
notice the chick in a hijab bitching about misogyny. this is feminism, boys.

[Anonymous No.7535047]

>>7534576
How do you ascend to such levels of analysis-incapable retardation?

[Anonymous No.7535057]

>>7534209
hahahaha holy shit one flew over the cuckoo's nest of all things?

MUH SOH JEE NEE

also
>don't think the novel offers much as an examination of the individual versus society

T R I G G E R E D

[Anonymous No.7535080]

>>7532467
>I feel like a well-educated adult
>takes a fucking month to read a not-even-200-page classic
>needs a ''and then this happened and all issues formerly mentioned are hereby resolved, you can buy my next book now'' structure
Oh, man. So even when you meet someone and they tell you they've read some classics, you can't be too sure.

[Anonymous No.7535100]

>>7534503
>>7534682
Ironically enough, the meta doesn't even really kick in until the second book.

To be fair, Don Quixote is a classic where I can understand people not being a fan of it. The humor is dated if you grow up on the internet. Once you've seen a nigga eat someone's face off at the side of the road, someone getting excited over sheep might not do it for you anymore. The same hilarity could've been achieved in 400-500 pages, saving the parts where (was it Sancho?) gets shit on, the tavern scene, and obviously the kingdoms part of the second book.

I enjoyed the work regardless, though.

[Anonymous No.7535168]

>>7534582

This comment is an outrage and an insult to all goldfishdom.

This is ignorant to the extreme and I find that the human-patriarchy has gone too far.

Goldfish can remember things for up to five months, more than enough time to remember Heart of Darkness (if they could read).

I expect a proper apology written to a major publication in less than 5 days or your name shall be spread across the twitter-dom with the hashtag #goldfishingorance, as a cross to bear for your clear anti-goldite sentiments.

Check your privilege, male pig.


(P.S. What is the image you posted? I don't get the reference... Thanks!)

[Anonymous No.7535191]

>>7534772

[Anonymous No.7535220]

>>7530408
>don't be as dumb as me
She gives sound advice OP, not sure what the problem is.

[Anonymous No.7535243]

>>7532524
>If an author is good, they won't need to be artificially "promoted"

I agree with most of this post but this is just wrong . To be a successful author you need at least 2 of the following

>'good'
>compatible with the zeitgeist
>lucky

[Anonymous No.7535244]

>>7530550
Women are by and large not very bright anon. Pretty much everyone of every political persuasion has agreed on this for nearly the entirety of recorded history, and most likely all of prehistory too. Liberty by definition was only ever meant to apply to rational men.

[Anonymous No.7535263]

>>7532524
>fail to promote books written by minorities
I don't think I've ever even researched the background of any authors I've read. Dostoyevsky could turn out to be a fucking nigger for all I care and it wouldn't affect my opinion of him in the slightest. Go back to tumblr.

[Anonymous No.7535303]

>>7535263
I encourage you to really look harder at both the reply you made and the post you replied to.

[Anonymous No.7535311]

Trying not to hate on The Martian but this review cracks me up every time.

[Anonymous No.7535312]

>>7535303
>poster criticises /lit/ for failing to promote minorities
>I say that I never research the background of authors, and as such it's impossible for me to be racially biased in my reading

What's the problem here?

[Anonymous No.7535323]

>>7530577
I literally met my girlfriend over a Book of the new Sun discussion. Why do you meet pleb women, are you a pleb Anon?

[Anonymous No.7535332]

What's with the /r9k/ brigade?

[Anonymous No.7535334]

>>7535311
I'm always cynical when celebrities gush over something lots of people gush over, since they might just want more publicity

[Anonymous No.7535361]

>>7534669
>that requires more intelligence to understand than they had to apply to fucking Harry Potter.

Every time I see an annoying review and check the person's profile the first thing I notice is that they're huge Harry Potter fans.

[Anonymous No.7535368]

[Anonymous No.7535373]

A lot of 1-star reviews from TTL are really funny, but I was to lazy to screenshot them all.

[Anonymous No.7535400]

[Anonymous No.7535401]

>>7535368
WHAT
FUCKING
BOOK
YOU
CUNT

[Anonymous No.7535408]

>>7535401
filename.png
faggot

[Anonymous No.7535409]

>>7535401
Watt, you idiot

[Anonymous No.7535413]

>>7535401
Don't you mean Watt fucking book? :^)

[Anonymous No.7535417]

>>7535373
Honestly this is a funny, well-crafted review. Hats off to the philistine.

[Anonymous No.7535429]

240 replies well colo-u-r me surprised

[Anonymous No.7535502]

>>7535400
That's some weak shit Donna, you better get it together. Life gets way harder than imaginary bunny rabbit violence in a children's book.

[Anonymous No.7535782]

>>7534822
Are you a god

[Anonymous No.7535809]

It's worse than i thought.

[Anonymous No.7535813]

>>7535809

[Anonymous No.7535834]

yikes

[Anonymous No.7535851]

>>7533402
Ideology, fäm

[Anonymous No.7535866]

>>7535813
>existentialism is and forever will e a dirty word for me
(some man on goodreads, 2016)
>Une dame dont on m'a parlé récemment, lorsque par nervosité, elle lâche un mot vulgaire, déclare en s'excusant : "Je crois que je deviens existentialiste".
translation:
I have heard of a woman recently who, nervously, uttered a vulgar word, and said to excuse herself: I think I am becoming existentialist") (Existentialism is an humanism, Sartre, 1946)

[Anonymous No.7535872]

>>7533402
>How the hell did white become synonymous with bad?

because of /r9k/ and /pol/ and reddit

[Anonymous No.7535875]

>>7535834
I found this on his page

[Anonymous No.7535883]

>>7533342
>naming yo'ure kid Thara

[Anonymous No.7535888]

>laughingflaubert.mp3

[Anonymous No.7535890]

[Anonymous No.7535935]

>>7534209
>The opinion of a character in the book is the writer's opinion
You can not imagine these feces

[Anonymous No.7535969]

>>7535047
1.Live on tumblr
2.That's it

[Anonymous No.7535979]

>>7535969
do /pol/ebs ever post anything not related to tumblr?

[Anonymous No.7536009]

Not a 1 star review, but one of the most autistic things I've ever read

[Anonymous No.7536039]

[Anonymous No.7536082]

>>7536039
>Star Trek profile picture
That's the icing on the cake

[Anonymous No.7536105]

These dumb cunts are talking about an autobiography.
Fooled by the title. c:

[Anonymous No.7536189]

[Anonymous No.7536366]

Every one star review of Lolita - "Waahhhh! PEDOPHILE!"

Every two star review of Lolita - "PEDOPHILE! And I can't understand poetry or love at all"

Every three star review of Lolita - "I want to post a one or two star review but I don't want to look like a pleb because everyone else thinks its amazing."

[Anonymous No.7536772]

>>7534257
Ian still gave FW a go after being "defeated" by Ulysses.

[Anonymous No.7536787]

Not my favorite book, and it's a 2 star review, but whatever, it's hilarious.

[Anonymous No.7536794]

>>7536787
I swear I attached it the first time . . .

[Anonymous No.7536893]

>>7530408

[Anonymous No.7537639]

>>7530852
>He was in a viscous cycle

[Anonymous No.7537665]

>>7536893
Mein gott, that guy is fucking stupid. Brave New World, the shit that middle schoolers understand, went entirely over his head.

[Anonymous No.7537730]

[Anonymous No.7537769]

>>7536082
Not only that, but it's Spock and he's shitting on one of the most important Stoic texs.

[Anonymous No.7537819]

get rekt, burroughs

[Anonymous No.7537824]

>>7530672
How much reddit browses /lit/

seriously ive been noticing it so much this past 2 hours and im starting to get sad

[Anonymous No.7537859]

>>7534834
Not anymore they don't. Not with the internet, Google, Stack Exchange, Quora, all the online courses, WolframAlpha, Wikipedia, Khan Academy etc. available. This in addition to the horrendous amount of affirmative action to get more women and minorities into universities by lowering the entry standards, and the reverse effect where asians have to score higher than usual to get in.

Times have changed anon. University isn't really worth it anymore if you want to do an arts degree, unless you want a job as an English lit professor living in fear of having his job cut.

[Anonymous No.7537868]

>>7533468
Get back under the deck, nigger.

[Anonymous No.7538335]

>>7536009
That is totally insane. And who all these people giving him all these likes?

[Anonymous No.7538377]

>>7532571
>starts pointing his Hemingway at anything that moves
lol

[Anonymous No.7538517]

Double feautre, I'm posting the link because I'm too lazy to screencap this one properly https://www.goodreads.com/review/show/134188435?book_show_action=false

[Anonymous No.7538521]

>>7530475
as someone who loves Aurelius, this was immensely triggering

[Anonymous No.7538563]

>>7538517
kek

[Anonymous No.7538588]

>>7538517
I agree about his writing though.

It's extremely frustrating to read. I know the prose in the book is extremely highly regarded, but I struggled with it like this woman. His lack of punctuation, Spanish dialogue, and extremely uncommon word usage was hard to get through.

[Anonymous No.7538616]

help

[Anonymous No.7538628]

>>7533645
>cause I felt like an unwashed pig when I used to doctor my rateyourmusic ratings to fit the curve.
Just did this the other day, and about to get to work on 'fixing' my film ratings. I do this like twice a year, really just to kill time while listening to music on my computer

[Anonymous No.7538635]

[Anonymous No.7538637]

>>7538635
Another one

[Anonymous No.7538665]

>>7534544
I love Dune and can't disagree with this on any level. It's comfy as fuck but it's lower-mid-tier fiction at best.

[Anonymous No.7538681]

>>7534576
>one of the original anti-imperialist texts
>racist
>Chinua Achebe even said later people should still read it and see for themselves if they agree
>doesn't read it, still calls it racist

I have a real, throbbing migraine now.

[Anonymous No.7538693]

>>7534669
>>7535361
So we are in agreement that Bloom was right about Harry Potter?

[Anonymous No.7538718]

>>7535809
>>7535813
>There is no trial
god damn, 4deep16them

[Anonymous No.7538761]

[Anonymous No.7538774]

>>7530408
An honest critique.

War & Peace was a snooze fest. I read it only for the Epic structure.

[Anonymous No.7538780]

>>7530408
I bet she gave 5 stars to every John Green book. Women generally only read children's books.

[Anonymous No.7538795]

>>7534748
savage

[Anonymous No.7538803]

>>7530506
The Idiot?

[Anonymous No.7538812]

>>7530577
>Book of the new Sun
>literature

[Anonymous No.7538830]

>Reading for the 'goodreads' cool points.

[Anonymous No.7539090]

>>7533402
>Motherfuckers be like, "Typical white thing to do"
I once saw someone describe some album guy recorded about following pigs around a farm or some random shit like that, and another responded with, bet you that guy's white

[Anonymous No.7539101]

>>7533503
Absolutely brilliant tbqh

[Anonymous No.7539115]

>>7534277
the majority is retarded period mate just accept it and move on

[Anonymous No.7539160]

>>7534837
Spending so much time on /lit/ has conditioned me to assume that what I'm reading is probably satire or at least (subtly) layered in (semi-serious) irony. I can laugh at pretty much any sentence now if I look at it in the right way.

[Anonymous No.7539204]

>>7535813
>Existentialism is and forever will be a dirty word to me

[Anonymous No.7539219]

>>7537665
I swear thinking the BNW is a utopia is a litmus test for idiots.

[Anonymous No.7539245]

>>7530408
>The only slightly interesting parts of this book were the lives of Natasha and Ellen

[Anonymous No.7539465]

>>7535502
But anon we read 2 escape life c:

[Anonymous No.7539470]

>>7535813
All these
>I won't mince my words
>proceeds to mince and bitch for the next 1000 words

[Anonymous No.7539737]

>>7534669
IJ is shit though, fuck off

[Anonymous No.7539754]

>>7530497
>women are treated as nothing but holes

[Anonymous No.7539761]

>>7533342
>could not emphasise
>emphasise

Subtle troll.

[Anonymous No.7539763]

>>7539754
hot af
where did you find it

[Anonymous No.7539771]

>>7539763
http://gardenhose.thecomicseries.com

[Anonymous No.7539777]

>>7530668
Men and women like different things. Who'd 'a thunk it?

We call their favourite reads trash, and they do likewise.

There are biological differences in the brain between genders.

On a tangentially related side note: without the differences, transgendered people and gender dysphoria (and the resulting depression) wouldn't exist.

[Anonymous No.7539780]

>>7532609
I want to cum inside this semen demon.

[Anonymous No.7539785]

>>7534099
>it's amazing someone can get so emotional over a book

must suck to be you to not identify strongly with characters and themes.

[Anonymous No.7539804]

>>7538335
he's one of the more famous reviewers.

[Anonymous No.7539818]

>>7536366

[Anonymous No.7539829]

>>7539777
>On a tangentially related side note: without the differences, transgendered people and gender dysphoria (and the resulting depression) wouldn't exist.
I like this. It reminds of the "You can be born as the wrong gender" vs. "Gender is a social construct" contradiction.

[Anonymous No.7539857]

>>7539829
That contradiction is *exactly* what I'm getting at, anon. It's the classic nature (genetics) vs nurture (upbringing and environment, a.k.a. social constructs).

Most radfems argue for nurture, but at the same time, fully support gender dysphoria and transgenderism, which couldn't exist if our brains were a clean slate with which we can mould by the environment.

It's quite amusing, really.

[Anonymous No.7539868]

>>7539857
A hole in my argument I can see is TERFs, or Trans-Exclusionary Radical Feminists.

They (sensibly, in my humble opinion) don't seem to believe that mutilated, hormonally charged, cross-dressing men are actually women. No amount of HRT can scrub away the Y chromosome.

[Anonymous No.7539931]

>>7539857
Someone's been reading Steve Pinker. In actual fact, he's attacking a strawman, because critical theory doesn't claim the biological differences don't exist, they just don't address them because they're not scientists and they don't know anything about it.