/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.22082568]

Suicidally depressed and can’t afford therapy because I’m a broke student. What books can I read in order too regain the will to live

[Anonymous No.22082571]

>>22082568
>Suicidally depressed and can’t afford therapy because I’m a broke student.

[Anonymous No.22082844]

>>22082568
Crime and Punishment

[Anonymous No.22082850]

>>22082568
Whats got you spiraling, anon?
Are you ugly? You don't need a gf to be happy anon.

[Anonymous No.22082861]

>>22082568
>Suicidally depressed and can’t afford therapy

[aaa No.22082876]

[aaa No.22082880]

[Anonymous No.22082881]

>>22082568
The Bible

[Anonymous No.22082882]

>paying for snake oil

[aaa No.22082894]

[Anonymous No.22082929]

>>22082568
Bhagavad Gita; detach yourself from the world and simply do your duty. Also don't go to therapy, that shit's retarded.

[Anonymous No.22083340]

>>22082844
>>22082880
I’ll start here
>>22082850
Mentally ill (now trans sexual) father who sends me death threats and a tumour that shattered my upper spine a few year ago. Also self imposed isolation and minor alcholism.
>>22082876
>>22082894
Not especially religious but I will see if I can get ahold of them
>>22082929
Hmm I’ve always been interested in eastern religions but never properly gotten into it, I’ll give it a read, thanks.

[Anonymous No.22083344]

>>22083340
(Too clarify my father was born male and now identifies as a woman)

[Anonymous No.22083355]

My dream is to be at least as well off as those who were never born, once I'm finally dead. The Bible does state that the dead are better off than the living, but that those who were never born are even better off than the dead. My dream is to overcome that last truth.

[Anonymous No.22083366]

>>22082568
I'd try talking to your student counsellor about ir

[Anonymous No.22083495]

>>22082568
Sup lil nigga
I'll help you out

[Anonymous No.22083499]

>>22082568
>>22083495
here

[Anonymous No.22083519]

>>22082568
>The one thing... that I need...
>to talk to some random fuckwit...
>I can't afford.....

[Anonymous No.22084045]

>>22082568
Unironically the Bible

t. faith in Christ prevented/prevents me from blowing my brains out

[Anonymous No.22084051]

Depression isn't real. Just stop being a fag.

[Anonymous No.22084060]

become an alcoholic

[Anonymous No.22084062]

>>22082568
The dream of a ridiculous man by Fyodor Dostoyevsky. It's a short story, 30 pages or so.
I don't want to spoil, and any detail I give it's a spoiler since it's a 30 page book, but the protagonist is also suicidal, and by the end of the book he has a new reason to live.

[Anonymous No.22084074]

>>22083340
>Not especially religious but I will see if I can get ahold of them
I think everyone can get something out of Tolstoy, religious or not.

[Anonymous No.22084091]

>>22084045
Reading the Bible hasn't given me any faith.

[Anonymous No.22084196]

>>22084091
Look into apologetics, fast, pray. Most importantly, don't read it like any other book. It's meditation literature, and, if you're willing to believe it, it's a living book which speaks to the reader. You merely have to receive the gift of grace.

[Anonymous No.22084274]

>>22084196
super massive cope.
>>22082568
live and endure, just to spite life and this world

[Anonymous No.22084287]

>>22082568
You sure your uni doesn’t have some kind of counseling services available?

[Anonymous No.22084962]

>>22084060
This is an excellent short-term solution. If alcohol isn't for you, try benzodiazepines: unlike alcohol, they are not addictive, yet operate upon the same GABA receptors that alcohol does to give you langorous, mute feeling of detachment you need. I take 30mg of diazepam everyday and it hasn't impacted my cognitive or physical performance at all.

[Anonymous No.22084973]

The 12 Rules of Life by Dr Jordan Bernt Peterson PhD

[Anonymous No.22084982]

>>22083340
>(now trans sexual)
Problem identified.

[Anonymous No.22085084]

>>22082568
There’s one called Learned Optimism that helped me a lot years ago. Don’t let the title fool you, it’s based on a psychologist’s decades long research on the mechanisms behind pessimistic and depressive patterns of thought and why certain people appear to be “immune” to them. The book’s main objective beyond that is to teach you how to recognising and understand your own depressive thoughts so as to diminish their hold upon you. It’s not a magical cure but I do believe it’ll help you.

[Anonymous No.22085097]

>>22083499
Not op, but ty. Checked.

[Anonymous No.22085103]

>>22084982
reading comprehension

[Anonymous No.22085107]

>>22082568
>therapy
>vent to some disinterested normie roastie
>she gives you some validation out of a book
>that'll be $200
why do men think there's an institutional solution to their problems?

[Anonymous No.22085118]

>>22085084
Fuck, there’s so many mistakes in my post. I should go to sleep. Anyway op, if you’re serious about it read the book, eat and sleep well and practice some form of exercise. Besides being good for you these things also give you a routine. Routine gives depressive people stability. I can’t find it right now, but there’s a short interview where Tyson Fury describes how he has been depressed for pretty much his whole life and how fucked up he got after retiring for the first time. The guy went from being a heavyweight champion to becoming an alcoholic who spent his days feeling like shit, laying around and getting fat. Then he had a wake up moment, went back to training despite being all fucked up and managed to win the championship again. Getting out of his routine destroyed him and going back to it was his salvation.

[Anonymous No.22085288]

>>22083499
leaves of grass is garbage and you cannot change my mind

[Anonymous No.22085300]

>>22082568
Therepy doesn't work. Go to church retard.

[Anonymous No.22085317]

>>22082881
Bump. I read it every night and super content with life.

[Anonymous No.22085362]

>>22084060
>>22084962
After months of mixing valium and alcohol I started smoking again as well. I am smoking more than a pack a day. I've got an aching between my wingbones that I know is due to how much I've been smoking. I'm telling myself I should quit, but I don't want to feel better, and certainly I don't care about my health anymore. I just want that little tiny bit of relaxation and numbness. I cannot kill myself as long as my family is alive.
As for the topic, I think if you have chronic suicidal thoughts they will never go away. This is like a chronic illness, it's going to be a lifelong thing. You will always want to kill yourself.

[Anonymous No.22085371]

Possibly the only thing that I have found to work is to keep yourself busy. If you always work on something you can get to the end of the day without thinking. Now the problem here is being motivated to keep a job or work on a hobby. I personally have stopped. I'm out of money and I have a gym subscription, so every day I show up there and one hour is gone. Most of the time I just sleep. I quit reading a few months ago.

[Anonymous No.22085487]

I think some people are just more attuned to Death than others. It's like the lady has taken a special liking to you, and you can see her and hear her whispers. God isn't real, dreams aren't real, but Death is very real, and you know very well what she offers to you. Just like a revelation of the existence of God would stay with you forever, so does this awareness of Death and her gift. It will never go away, you cannot forget it just like you cannot forget any absolute truth that you come to learn during your lifetime. And the lady has all the patience and time in the world to convince you.

[Anonymous No.22085494]

>>22082568
A thread like this one shows up every 3 days here on /lit/. If you're serious, why don't you visit some of those threads? See warosu.org/lit/
Otherwise, if this is a joke, it is not funny, nor does repeating it 4000 times a month make it any funnier. A good thread died for this.
Or maybe /lit/ is full of depressed weirdos.

[Anonymous No.22085852]

Read some of tolstoy and dostoyevskys big novels. Worked for me at least. I get frustrated sometimes, sure, but I don't get depressed or suicidal at all anymore after reading some of those books, after years of dealing with such feelings for most of my life

[Anonymous No.22085873]

>>22084274
>>22084274
>Calls faith a cope
>Literally advocates for coping and seething
shiggy diggy

[Anonymous No.22085910]

>>22082568
Just bury it down. White knuckle it for a few weeks until is subsides. Read Schopenhauer for the resonance.

[Anonymous No.22085918]

>>22083340
>Mentally ill (now trans sexual) father who sends me death threats
No way, that sucks bigly if true anon.

[Anonymous No.22085930]

>>22085288
Song of Myself is the best thing to ever be written in English

[Anonymous No.22085954]

>>22085362
Couldn't agree more. It won't go away and it gets worse. It gets worse the more you read too. You'll form a resilience to the hopelessness but the big waves will only get bigger.

[Anonymous No.22085996]

>>22083495
>Life A User's Manual
Two people get their throats slit open in the first like ten pages of the book, how is that bloomer

[Anonymous No.22086107]

>>22083495
>>22083499
Some of these where on my top read list anyways so I’ll start with those, thanks.
>>22084045
Maybe it’s time to try to become religious, I haven’t really had any luck with it, but I guess it’s worth a shot.
>>22084062
I could probably read that in a day if it’s only 30 pages, thanks for the recommendation.
>>22084982
Literally clarified it here >>22083344
how the fuck did you still misinterpret
>>22085084
>>22085118
Your post already seems like solid advice, I’ll look into the book as soon as possible, thank you.
>>22085300
Last time i was there it was just a bunch of bored old people and a half interested preacher, maybe it’s just because I’m European though.
>>22085371
Seems to align with what >>22085118 said, so probably sound advice, I’ll try to develop some kind of routine.
>>22085487
Well unless I get amnesia it would seem I’m pretty fucked then.
>>22085494
Apologise if that’s the case, I only browse lit every once in a while to pick up book recommendations so I haven’t noticed posts like this.
>>22085852
A lot of other people are have recommend Dostoevsky in the thread so far, I’ll probably start with his books and the learned optimism book.
>>22085918
Some cherries on top is that he beat my mother and gave her ptsd and has been trying to jeporise my academic pursuits by sending false claims about me to schools. (He was also a prostitute as if he couldn’t be anymore of a failure)

[Anonymous No.22086126]

>>22083499
I love Rousseau’s reveries but I am not sure I would call it life affirming or optimistic. 25% of the book is him bitching about being exiled and dunking on the Philosophes.

[Anonymous No.22086131]

>>22082568
Your school may offer free mental health services

[Anonymous No.22086222]

>>22083366
>>22084287
>>22086131
OP doesn't care about helping himself... he wants to relish in his trite jokerfied dark academia pity party literary infant terrible bullshit fantasy guys

[Anonymous No.22086347]

>>22083366
>>22084287
>>22086131
They say they only deal with mental health directly caused by academic work
>>22086222
Which is obviously why I asked for books on how to solve the situation or wanted therapy. Fucking tard.

[Anonymous No.22086374]

>>22086347
>They say they only deal with mental health directly caused by academic work
Just lie so you can get your foot in the door

[Anonymous No.22086416]

>>22086374
Worth a shot, though none of my issues are actually academic so not sure how long I can keep that up.

[Anonymous No.22086432]

>>22086347
There isn't a counsellor in the university system who's going to refuse you help because your depression isn't technically workload related. You're paying these cunts so stop whinging and get help.

[Anonymous No.22086508]

>>22086107
Anon, please don't hate your father for being XYZ, because that'll lead to a lot of disgruntled resentment. However, feel free to resent him for being an asshole abusive piece of shit. Death threats towards your son is fucked up.

That being said, please don't kill yourself. Don't know who you are anon, but am sending you a virtual hug, full homo. Unless you hate faggots then strictly bromo.

For books on will to live I'd strongly suggest Man's Search for Meaning. Dude who went through holocaust and lost everything - including his wife - and figuring out how to cope.
Also would suggest hopeful memoirs like Memoir of a Boy Soldier, which explores finding hope from strangers. For fiction I really enjoyed flowers for algernon. Has disadvantaged person gain intellect. People interpret the ending as sad, but I see it as a hopeful ending and valuing self-worth, even for the literal retarded. Disgrace is a good book of coping with people who just have different world view / choices than you and learning to cope with that, even if you view their path as self-destructive. Do you have a goodreads anon? If you're suicidal anyway might as well share it

[Anonymous No.22086777]

>>22084196
This was beautifully put.

[Anonymous No.22086878]

Out of everyone in the thread you could listen to, please ignore this retard:
>>22086508

[Anonymous No.22087167]

>>22086416
My ex didn’t even pretend to be going because of college related issues and nothing happened to her. At most the therapist just told her that she should still pursue therapy outside of uni once she had the money for it. My only advice about therapy is to avoid the egocentric ones and psychoanalysts.

[Anonymous No.22087531]

>>22085996
You read half-assedly

[Anonymous No.22087542]

every college has free shrinks for students. go sign up.

[Anonymous No.22087737]

>>22083340
Generally a good read for this kind of condition

[Anonymous No.22087742]

>>22085494
>Or maybe /lit/ is full of depressed weirdos.
It's this. I am not OP, so I can vouch as a suicidal regular. It's just a bit tough to bite the final bullet. Hope springs eternal, annoyingly.

[Anonymous No.22087764]

>>22084962
unless you are dealing in deadpan sarcasm, the is the most idiotic and senselessly advice one could ever give someone with suicidal idealization. truly disgraceful. 100 points from Gryffindor.

[Anonymous No.22087815]

>>22086107
You are not your father, anon. Just because he made you doesn't mean you owe him anything. If anything at all, he owes you, and while waiting for any kind of catharsis through him may well be a waste of time, it also pays not to to give him the power over you life, that he so desperately craves for his own. From what I can understand, he's trying to assert control over his own life vicariously through you, and that's not the workings of a loving parent, but of a narcissistic scumbag with no sense of self value. You don't have to take after him in any way, you can be your own person my friend, It may take

I'm no psychologist or therapist, but I was born to a very shitty family and both of my parents were the black sheep of their respective families, so by proxy, I have an extended family of aloof bougie assholes who never wanted anything to do with me and looked at me as guilty by association. If there's one thing I know, it's that you can't pick your birth family, but you can choose the kind of people to surround yourself with that make you happy and accepted. It may take some time to find them, but they are out there. You may ever know them already, who am I to say, I don't know you from Adam, but I do believe you will be alright in the long run. I believe in in you.

Also, fuck this guy
>>22087167

[Anonymous No.22087819]

>>22087815
Dammit, I meant this >>22086878 guy