Poetry Thread

[Anonymous No.18587179]

Post and rate.
No rate = no feedback.
All welcome.

[Anonymous No.18587181]

I smoke weed, therefore I am...

[Anonymous No.18587191]

Nightingale,
Illuminate that silver shine
Hid hung on your pendant

As in the shower
With crystal tiles

Or on the beach,
With crystal lives
Shattering the sky,

You lie restless.
Awake until swirls
Of stars and cars

And a million miles
Of lungs 'a tar
Sound strummed

From Spanish guitar.

*

I promise this is the last time, gonna move on to something new after. I feel like ive said what i wanted to say in this version.

[Anonymous No.18587198]

>>18587181
Is this a bot?

[Anonymous No.18587202]

Previous thread
>>18580152

[Anonymous No.18587215]

>>18587198
nah lol i just smoke weed hahaaa

[Anonymous No.18587437]

>>18587181
DUDE

[Anonymous No.18587483]

Such were the sad case
Of cases such as mine
And did the sky race
From under the pines
One of whom still bears
High up its trunk: a sign
Now somewhat erased
Ten tipsy carved lines
Make a heart to encase
Your initial, next to mine

>>18587191
the verse seperation seems arbitrary.
>'a tar
dont like. but i really like the ending you came up with.

[Anonymous No.18588615]

>>18587483
Huh what

[Anonymous No.18588626]

Pillowy white
My petals sweat waxy and dew
The Pink Fluster that lost luster
What can I do

Flowering new once more for you
Strings wear and bend
And can't escape
Or help but wonder when when when

I see the branch wither and peel and fall away
Turn to your eyes
-well just your side

Theres no embrace

[Anonymous No.18588837]

You were,
And I believed in that hidden place.
But the uneven roots caused the wild rose to wither.

You leaved,
And my God became my friend in time,
And the memories were dragged away with the rush of oblivion.

Now you´re not anymore.
And the depth of the wound makes the ride warmer.

Yet, the soul of a beggar cannot be filled with eternity.
Thus, the only thing left are illusions.

Good thing these words are not mine;
these feelings are not true,
and this fatality, as this life, is fleeting.


First time doing this shit.

[Anonymous No.18589773]

I will give a full line-by-line critique of anyone at least 25 years old. All you have to do is post your poem along with documentary photo evidence (can blackout everything except your birthdate).
t. published poet

[Anonymous No.18589876]

How would you go about putting your poems into a collection. I have a lot of individual poems, but how do you sort them in a way that creates some kind of unity in the book?

[Anonymous No.18589899]

>>18589876
No universal answer. Look at your heroes and emulate them. Personally I'd arrange it so that the collection is bookended by long poems. And then making the necessary connections on a poem-by-poem basis. No collection has ever made 100% rhyme and reason out of its ordering.

[Anonymous No.18589914]

He lies down - evening as his blanket
(as there is not much else to be done)
listening to the tubers, cole crops
and the cancer growing in his mouth


>>18587191
Feels a little bit disconnected to me. But I like the physicality of it all - of light, the motion in "swirls" and the vibration of the guitar's strings.
>>18587483
I like the concrete precision in "Ten tipsy carved lines".
Don't see the point of the first two verses though.

[Anonymous No.18590222]

>>18589773
Could you give any general tips at all. How did you get published?

[Anonymous No.18590264]

>>18589773
I'm over 25 and a better poet than you, fuck off

[Anonymous No.18590441]

>>18590222
Just kept writing and editing after I left grad school. Submitted everywhere and eventually got a few poems accepted. Persistence is the key.
>>18590264
no h8, only good vibes f a m

[Anonymous No.18590582]

>>18590441
Post your name, drivers license, and proof of publish and I'll give you my age with proof

[Anonymous No.18590621]

>>18590582
I'm offering in-depth critiques, nothing more. Whether you like them or not is up to you

[Anonymous No.18590762]

>>18590621
F
u
c
k

O
f
f

[Anonymous No.18591061]

>>18587179
>I shall rate later.

You made
A list

The warnings
You missed

Love takes shape
You gasp and gape
You can't escape

It

You need
Maybe it's greed


Lust
For seed

[Anonymous No.18591165]

>>18587179
Americas last hours

Hit
The twin towers

In ‘01
We are done

>>18587181
I post, therefore I am
>>18587191
>I promise this is the last time
You swear on your mother?
>>18587483
Can you read that out loud? It reads very strangely. Not even sure what it is about.
>>18588626
Needs to be shorter and reformatted.
>>18588626
My petals

The Pink Fluster
Lost luster

What can I do

Flowering new
Once more for you

Strings wear
They break
Can't escape

Your eyes
There lies
No embrace

I wilt
In front of your face
>>18589914
crap
>>18590762
10/10

[Anonymous No.18591169]

>>18587179
On /lit/ I quit

The game of life

Fame outta frame

For

No pussy, just books

I get

Weird looks

[Anonymous No.18591671]

bump