what's on your mind

[Anonymous No.18407690]

[Anonymous No.18407699]

>>18407690
/lit/ is populated by, for lack of a better word, pseuds. People who want to act sophisticated, the type of person that would go on an anime imageboard to discuss books. The problem is that they aren't actually well-rounded or smart, but they want to act like it, and act in ways that other people like them will immediately recognize, so they essentially cargo-cult hard rules for what smart people do into existence.

[Anonymous No.18407703]

I just can't get over how heckin good Call of the Crocodile is bros.

[Anonymous No.18407714]

>>18407699
it feels like everything nowadays is just a facsimile of what it pretends to be. "Intellectuals" are no exception.
Picrelated is on my mind.

[Anonymous No.18407724]

I have only read 20 books in my life(last year. This year 0)
idk if I liked them or not
I normally don't know if I like anything or it's an mirage of liking something
Idk how to feel liking towards something
should I go outside
will it make me start liking things

[Anonymous No.18407748]

>>18407690
Buck breaking

[Anonymous No.18407826]

I'm starting to think that enrolling in university was a mistake, at least doing it the past year. I don't know anyone from my classes, I have lost almost all contact with my highschool friends because I don't use social media, my grades have dropped considerably, have no motivation, have to stare at a computer screen for hours. It's all so tiresome. I've even turned underweight, and I've been losing a lot hair during this period, just to learn almost nothing.
I don't even know how things will be once I get to work. I don't know why keep studying, if I will probably get replaced by a machine who can do a much better work than me in a few years.
Pretty much all of my social interections are here, I'm missing out on the college life, I'm not learning, my life is just getting worse.

[Anonymous No.18407841]

>>18407690
The past couple of weeks have been the first for me that I've lived like a real life adult person where you get worked to fuck all week, get fucked up to the gills on weekends and spend the following day or two just trying to not have your body finally shut down for good. Don't really like this kind of living, but it's been the first time in probably about two years where I've let out genuine laughter that came from interacting with other people so it's not all bad.

[Anonymous No.18407843]

>>18407690
I’ve finally figured it out bros. I feel like a fucking kid again when it comes to reading. I did it. The genuine excitement and wonder, the mystery of holding a book and seeing how beautiful the cover is wondering what kind of adventure you’ll go on inside. Jesus Christ, how did I let this go?

[Anonymous No.18407844]

>>18407826
I saved this pajeet's post
it helped me


>My friend killed himself last week. He was a very demotivated person, told his whole life that he was a waste if space and he would achieve nothing
To all the anons out there who feel demotivated or nihilistic or unambitious about life, please read my experience and change yourself. Try to live life to the fullest.

I am a pajeet and in my country of you are bad at maths you are basically considered braindead and teachers can just go around insulting you to your face. I was like this and because of being bad plus being demotivated I dropped maths and science in the last two years of high-school.

Then went to uni to study psych, but had a kind of thirst in myself to study philosophy and maths and truly understand the beauty of them. I started studying everyday. I went fucking autistic, mental maths drills for multiple hours a day, completing fucking hungarian competition maths problems, soviet text books. Learnt to code and now I work in a good company in germany.

I earn well, i read everyday and I am earning more than my friends do with stem degrees. I am soon gonna leave the job and pursue higher studies in psychology(I love it) and freelance to earn well enough on the side.

You have no idea how much you can change yourself anon
You have no damn idea

Just work on anyfucking thing you can think of
Any fucking skill, try it for 1,000 hours at least. This is sufficient time to see if you have talent, or passion or not. Don't give up faggot

[Anonymous No.18407849]

>>18407724
just continue reading, you just didnt read enough to make comparisons

[Anonymous No.18407855]

>>18407843
how did you got it?
I have lost this excitement from everything not just reading

[Anonymous No.18407861]

>>18407690
Waiting for the end.

[Anonymous No.18407907]

>>18407855
I’m not really sure, I’ve been reading pretty consistently for the past few months, but just today those feelings hit me. It started with me reading some books I loved as a kid, quick short stuff, and eventually led to finding books I was generally interested in and wanted to read.

But today I just looked at my bookshelf and just felt this, giddiness about it. I bought some books yesterday, and seeing them all arranged neatly I just have this urge to read all of them now, I can’t wait to start each and every one of them. I have this insatiable urge to check out every bookstore in the area, just to see what they have.

I don’t know if I have answer for you, but the best advice I can give is stop doing stuff or reading books that someone told you to read because you should. Read something because you want to, which in hindsight is pretty simple, but I think the distinction between the two is very important.

[Anonymous No.18407909]

>>18407690
not the right place for this (that sounds like nonsense but I believe it) but can't help myself from thinking about this QT lass I met at church yesterday. I'm very taken by her and she was receptive and clearly into me, we got on swimingly and even chatted literature, but maaan it's been a while and I've taken probably 2-3 years to sort myself out since my last actual relationship. There's that, and my other issue is I added her Instagram (inb4 zoomer normie) and she had the pronouns in the bio and is clearly some kind of progressive Christian, whereas I'm quite the conservative Christian (moreso dogmatically). At this point I'm lonely enough to crave that companionship and be with someone who shares the faith, but honestly I feel the political/doctrinal differences will just rear at some point and by then things will just sour. I'm of the opinion that to attempt to change her isn't really fair to her as a person and probably foolish.

At least I feel something, there's been times over the last few years I've felt really quite bleak about the state of things, which is creatively bankrupt (in my experience and practice). I can USE this strife and tension between us and what we believe at least.

Hope you all are well.

[Anonymous No.18407960]

Horrible swell. The tide is in my heart. What devastation, how I would have preferred not to love her, she who is however so lovable. So much ingenuity, beauty, wit, kindness and grace united in one woman, what a wonder of creation; what a torment for me. As soon as I get rid of the thousand-toothed hydra of uncertainty which unbearably gnaws at the soul, I am thrown into the ebb and flow of the contrary and brutal passions of misfortune. And I am well obliged to pretend nothing. I knew that it would be only embarrassment, embarrassment of the embarrassment, I quintessenced the most embarrassing of the human love. I withered her heart which is not new any more, I certainly caused concern to her mother who is so good. What a guilty inclination that presses my heart and sows hawthorn, periwinkle and worry without her fertile and sweet soul. I pray that you keep the ineffable diaphanousness of your heart.

[Anonymous No.18407971]

>>18407690
I can't fucking breathe, it's hindering my ability to think.

[Anonymous No.18407999]

>>18407703
why does amazon 5 star reviews dont have anything written? only the 1 star ones have written reviews

[Anonymous No.18408000]

>>18407971
are you george floyd perchance?

[Anonymous No.18408007]

>>18408000
No, I just have undiagnosed asthma.

[Anonymous No.18408015]

>>18407999
Because Gardner gave away his books for free on this site when he released them. That led to troll reviews.

[Anonymous No.18408020]

>>18408007
well that's quite understandable

>>18407999
the dregs of society need words, words, words to justify their ignorance. the patrician need only his stars which say every thing. nice digits.

[Anonymous No.18408078]

>>18407909
If you try things out with her, I think it's best to communicate your beliefs and life plans right away so you don't drag on a relationship bound for failure.

[Anonymous No.18408131]

>>18408078
I think so. Might take her out a few times and see what it is, anyway; might be a nice way to ease in to seeing people again I suppose

[Anonymous No.18408144]

>>18408015
>>18408020
idk guys it seems like the 5 stars reviews are the trolls who didnt read the book

[Anonymous No.18408148]

>>18407690
im glad you finally got to use your duck pic, OP

[Anonymous No.18408149]

I should start making masks.

[Anonymous No.18408167]

I'm moving into a new apartment next weekend and it's really becoming apparent how little stuff I really have to take with me. A kitchen table, computer desk, TV stand, and book case accounts for all of my furniture. I won't even have a bed and will have to sleep on the floor the first few days (maybe a week?) before the one I ordered arrives.

No couch. No coffee table. No side tables. No decor whatsoever really. So anyways, I'm imagining how empty this living room area is going to look like without any of this stuff, and maybe I want to start furnishing it up, but it's been so long since I saw a properly furnished living area (my mom's place maybe?) that I actually can't picture what I'm missing or what to look for.

Seriously, what the fuck do people put in their houses? Even supposing I do get a couch and a coffee table soon. What else? Those weird fake plants or some shit? I have distinct emotional imprints of so many cluttered houses in my past memory, but I can't actually remember what they looked like, just what they were. Help a nigga out with some ideas, so it doesn't look like a weird town-skipping scam artist with no possessions is the resident of my apartment.

[Anonymous No.18408177]

>>18408167
Get sum pictures on ya walls lad

[Anonymous No.18408183]

>>18408167
don't clutter your living space if it isn't on your heart, anon. I guess on /fa/ there's an interior design general most days, could look there? or even IKEA cringe as it may seem. you just lack ideas it seems. Think about what you need, and the space you're living in, and then about how those elements can connect and complement one another

[Anonymous No.18408187]

>>18408149
what kind of masks?

[Anonymous No.18408189]

>>18407844
Even if I agree with this, I can't think of any skill I would learn for itself. To persist working on something for 1.000 Hours one should have a clear motivation (money, passion or whatever). In my personal case nothing comes to my mind since I had never had hobbies or clear talents

[Anonymous No.18408192]

my bathtub drain is completely clogged I'm fucked

[Anonymous No.18408199]

>>18408187

[Anonymous No.18408207]

>>18408192
please sir not putting those pubes down that drain, can you kindly unblock the drain as needful? thank you kindly

[Anonymous No.18408213]

>>18407690
>sure I've never published anything but I won money from a writing contest once
>can't even prove that
Why are pseuds like this? Why do they shit on writers writing their stories but never back up their own?

[Anonymous No.18408241]

>>18408144
No read closely. Most of the negative reviews say they just read the first page or something

[Anonymous No.18408244]

someone on /lit/ recently claimed that the new age movement of the 1960's was a CIA plot to make the counterculture movement docile and nonviolent. does anyone have any more information about this/some books on the topic? It could just be conspiracy shit but it sounds plausible

[Anonymous No.18408259]

>>18407909
hahaha no one cares kill yourself christfag christianity is gayyyyy gay gay gay

[Anonymous No.18408285]

>>18408149
oh man what's up i'm literally making masks as i'm typing this, i mean i'm sketching out mask designs that will later be made into real masks. i'm in the process of making the 7th mask design out of 21 masks. anyway, this is not the first time i get weird coincidences with anons in this general, it's funny.

[Anonymous No.18408289]

>>18408148
thank you man, appreciate it

[Anonymous No.18408314]

>>18407909
>I can't be in a relationship with someone who doesn't precisely share the EXACT same beliefs as me. Not even similar will do.
Kek you are such a close-minded rigid little bitch, you don't even deserve a relationship. I hope your relationship fails.

[Anonymous No.18408318]

>>18408244
Half correct Google kgb active measures. The entire anti war movement in Vietnam was started by the kgb

[Anonymous No.18408327]

>>18407690
My room is pungent with the heavy, earthy odour of marajuana and the perfume of acrid sweat. Yet I am not the one who smokes.

[Anonymous No.18408341]

>>18408244
>60's new age
>docile

[Anonymous No.18408347]

>>18408327
this post reads like poetry

[Anonymous No.18408350]

>>18408207
it's not my fault I grow and shed many pubes.

[Anonymous No.18408354]

>>18407690
>is my english right, or will anons discover I'm a macaco?

[Anonymous No.18408359]

>>18407844
>I went fucking autistic, mental maths drills for multiple hours a day, completing fucking hungarian competition maths problems, soviet text books.
I was like that my first two years of college. I don't know what happened but now I'm just depressed, wanting to die every day and forgetting everything I knew
I don't know how to be like that again, I try but I don't care about anything for some reason i'm still trying to find.

[Anonymous No.18408388]

>>18408259
sneed

>>18408314
no need to be rude. How do you reconcile those differences when it's not only related to a deeply held spiritual position, but then extruded to such a place of societal virtue? I mean I've had 'friends' call me a bad person for gently admitting I don't believe in the legitimacy of transgender 'theory' (for lack of a more elegant phrase)? or tell me I'm an arsehole because I'm thoroughly cynical about politics in my country and couldn't justify voting whatsoever, which prompted such a monumental seethe from two girls I know in particular. People hold these positions as modern idols, anon.

[Anonymous No.18408412]

I'm addicted to watching femdom JOI videos. Idk what it is but they just get me harder than anything else in a way that normal naked girls don't. Even if I go a few weeks without watching them, either doing no porn or just jerking off to vanilla stuff I eventually end up getting an itch that I need to scratch by looking up the reddit account of this femdom girl who lives near me who posts picture of herself in latex outfits and posts personals every so often looking for a guy to lock up in chastity and dom long term. I know I would never actually answer this personal and talk to her let alone go do it, I know the reality of it would disgust me and I'd always regret letting a woman do that to me. Yet the idea keeps inching it's way back up until I go on week-long binges of weird femdom porn before I get disgusted enough with myself that I quit cold turkey for a few weeks. I think I'm being haunted by a succubus or something. It doesn't help that irl I'm desperate for female attention and have not even talked to a woman my age in months. I meet none irl and apps lead me nowhere. The modern world is truly an evil machine that picks at our most vile and basest tendencies like scabs until buckets of sin pour out like blood. I just want to find a normal girl and have a normal relationship where I act like a proper man.

[Anonymous No.18408426]

>>18408199
I agree you should

[Anonymous No.18408451]

I have started to play the keyboard again. I hope I can surprise myself. Slow and steady.

[Anonymous No.18408481]

>>18408388
Because individuals have varying ideological stances and if you are unable to accept into your subjective experience the subjective experience of another person then you are going to remain alienated for the rest of your life, seeking refuge in hugboxes and safe spaces where you will never be confronted to any viewpoint even remotely different from yours, circle-jerking with a bunch of lonely faggots who are just like you and who always agree with you. The world will never go your way, you have to either kill yourself or deal with it, either accept this and venture out into the wild, or remain curled up in a ball, imprisoned in a claustrophobic cocoon of your own making. I'm an agnostic who studies eastern theology, I'm in a relationship with a christian. We also have wildly different political stances. It is fucking okay. We can connect beyond this, human intimacy and understanding and empathy goes beyond our autistic political opinions, because we have much to teach to one another. It is only when you can accept the person who is different from you as your own that you truly can grow. But half of the retards on this site don't even know what proximity with another person is and so they will never understand this, alas.

[Anonymous No.18408483]

I had blood on my ass again, it can't go on like this, I have to see a doctor and it's not funny. I'm freaking out, god damn piece of shit. FUCK! Your mother sucks BIG FUCKING ELEPHANT DICKS! JUST LET ME LIVE! FUCK!

[Anonymous No.18408489]

I wrote 300 + pages of schizo rambling in word. I settles my truth. I am donw with everyting. There is nothing more. I will kill myself the next time I feel like it. Life is completed. I found truth and it is unchangeble. No, before you ask, it doesnt mean a thing. But truth was never meant to mean anything. It's done. We're out. Good luck. Enjoy

[Anonymous No.18408490]

All you bitch ass niggas talking shit and I have blood on my ass. FUCK

[Anonymous No.18408494]

>>18408489
What is it about?

[Anonymous No.18408497]

>>18408490
you're the bitch ass nigger here bud, maybe stop with the sodomy

[Anonymous No.18408498]

All you bitch ass niggas talk shit and I have blood on my ass. FUCK

[Anonymous No.18408501]

>>18408490
Okay, dude. I have IBD, and you don't see me crying on here. It's not an issue.

[Anonymous No.18408506]

*uhh I'm so smart and depressed, I can't go outside and this and that* and I have blood on my ass. FUCK

[Anonymous No.18408508]

>>18408506
Calm down love

[Anonymous No.18408515]

>>18408506
isn't this a tourettes guy skit

[Anonymous No.18408523]

>>18408501
>It's not an issue.

It's an issue because I'm an athlete and I can't afford to bleed on my ass all the time, god damn I have to see a doctor again.

[Anonymous No.18408555]

>>18407826
you should take a stroll over to the student mental help services offices and talk to somebody because it sounds like you've got some bad depression. i'd also recommend talking to your faculty advisor and maybe even speaking to the dean of men. you're already paying for them to help you, so use the services

beyond that, join a club or get a part time job, you need to get out of your head

[Anonymous No.18408571]

>>18408213
Because Pseuds more often than not, are terrible writers themselves.

[Anonymous No.18408580]

and my ass and stomach feel weird all the time, I just wanna be a normal person... and my wisdom teeth will have to be extracted soon. I hate this shit. why...

[Anonymous No.18408600]

I guess I have to shave my ass hair, because the doctor is definitely not in the mood to see a hairy ass. but with what, the question arises. with my shaver that I use for my face? are you kidding me? so should I order a new shaver now that I only use for my ass? wtf bro

[Anonymous No.18408614]

strange woman in my life. I basically just told her all my schizo religious kookery. I don't think she is particularly interested. I don't think she'll stick around, but I can't think of any way that I could have related to her without telling her... hell I can't even really think about anything to talk about other than the schizo kookery. Why talk aobut anything else when God IS? Then again, what reason is that for talking? Am I trying to make myself seem interesting? Am I drowning in ideas that we'll just have to see if they make me one of the true religious fools or not?

[Anonymous No.18408616]

>>18408600
I don't think the doctor will care desu

[Anonymous No.18408626]

>>18408616
The best part was that I didn't shave my ass last time and the doctor was a very pretty woman, she was so beautiful ... she was definitely not satisfied with my ass. Who wants to see a hairy ass? Maybe people who enjoy watching some Asian porn.

[Anonymous No.18408629]

>>18407690
A woman named Caroline, as has been the case for months now.

[Anonymous No.18408640]

>>18408481
Of course different individuals carry different views, goals, histories, etc. with them and are ultimately formed as a product of those (I'm not so simple as you seem to assume I am). Furthermore, I hang out MOSTLY with athiest-agnostics and people who are much more to the left than me (and some dimwit wignat friends also), so to imply also that I cannot deal with anything outwith my own frame honestly really winds me up - I mean I'm a convert to Christianity in the first place so don't dare assume I'm not open to new ideas or whatever.

It's different in terms of romantic relationships and raising a family though - the Bible tells us not to be unequally yoked with our partners, so in the first instance I wouldn't date a non-Christian girl. I appreciate your fervour in how you work around that, but it's different for many thiests (although your gf is seemingly not one). I wouldn't consider the more fundamental aspects of my faith 'autistic political opinions' - they are more inherent doctrinal issues within the church of which the fruits of modernity have intergrated themselves into by progressive agents. I'm getting tired so will wrap this up but basically because it's tied in with faith, that complicates things - if it were seperate from faith, like she was a vegan or something, secularly, that would be fine I suppose, though would rear problems. I should also mention you failed to notice I said I would see where it went and remain open, and lamented such a confusion within myself over the whole business.

Sorry for the wall of text again, it's cathartic I guess. best wishes to you though anon.

[Anonymous No.18408641]

My dick vein hurts when dick gets hard

[Anonymous No.18408644]

>>18408614
>Why talk aobut anything else when God IS?
Oh my god just shut up

[Anonymous No.18408659]

>>18408388
You are a bad person though

[Anonymous No.18408663]

>>18408412
>I just want to find a normal girl and have a normal relationship where I act like a proper man
But you obviously don't.

[Anonymous No.18408665]

I just want to know why my ass is bleeding ... and I want it to stop forever.

I wish you all well.

[Anonymous No.18408712]

>>18408641
>>18408665
I hope you frens get well
medical conditions are scary but don't be afraid unless a doctor says so
meet one when you can
I have problems of my own but because of covid I'll have to live with them for a few months more I guess
good luck frens

[Anonymous No.18408757]

>>18408494
Synthesis of Plato, Kant, Hegel, Deleuze and Michelstaetder. Nuances of other philosophers like Aurelius and Augustinus and Plotin, presocratics and last but not least Aristotle in between.

[Anonymous No.18408769]

What nation has the best literature right now?

[Anonymous No.18408803]

>>18406898
You killed this anon OP

[Anonymous No.18408853]

>>18408769
there's no best, there's only worst and worster

[Anonymous No.18408856]

How do I focus on writing when I have a loud, obnoxious family that doesn't understand the value of leaving someone alone? Get a job and save for a car?

[Anonymous No.18408864]

>>18408856
Go to a park or library

[Anonymous No.18408924]

Just put a curse on someone for the lulz m8 real proper horror show, lesse if dis fucka bites the bullet or if I just LARPed for an hour

either way bruv im kinda laughin to myself cuz this guys a real fail boy, like dresses like a bum and thinks Lacan is still relevant like it’s 1998 or sumthin. No wonder he’s bummin rides like a real one-pump chump m8

[Anonymous No.18408942]

look, i get it. you got jealous of butterfly. but you got to understand my love is only for you

[Anonymous No.18408950]

AS HE LIGHTS AN AMERICAN SPIRIT
HE ASK ME HOW I CAN SMOKE SUCH SHIT

[Anonymous No.18409005]

>>18408803
Board culture is going to the grave. :(

[Anonymous No.18409018]

What should I read next:
>Thomist Realism and A Critique of Knowledge ~ Etinee Gilson
>The Spirit of Medieval Philosophy ~ Etinee Gilson
>After Virute ~ Alasdair Macintyre
>Orthodoxy ~ GK Chesterton

[Anonymous No.18409023]

>>18407826
Going to University is a decision that a very large proportion of people regret. Take a year off,work and go outside. Dont be a bitch

[Anonymous No.18409041]

>>18408412
Just go be her bitch and get it out of your system

[Anonymous No.18409069]

I just moved into an apartment after living at home and the noise is killing me. Even hearing the upstairs neighbor walk around is bothering me.

As a society we place too little value on silence.

[Anonymous No.18409107]

>>18409069
I totally agree. Theres just constant noise everywhere I go. Its almost worst at night. It seems like everyone is loudest when the sun sets. Invest in ear plugs

[« Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ » !!bGBGaUpA8kS No.18409121]

It was actually louder living with family. Now I can hear my tinnitus loud and clear...
>puts on music
Wish I could hear silence

[Anonymous No.18409142]

>>18409107
....You were supposed to encourage me and say I'll get used to it.

[Anonymous No.18409158]

I have an exam today /lit/. Wish me luck.

[Anonymous No.18409162]

>>18409158
Good luck.

[Anonymous No.18409167]

>>18408663
I do I just don't know where to meet women nowadays. I have no luck on apps and I don't know any irl. I have literally nobody irl to focus my horniness on so I'm stuck looking at weirder and weirder shit.

>>18409041
I think there's a huge difference between thinking about something and actually doing it and I don't want that in my past. I don't want there to be some random girl out there who can say she did X to me. Watching the porn is bad enough but that's just a private shame for now.

[Anonymous No.18409197]

>>18408757
Post it.

[Anonymous No.18409209]

>>18409167
Too many people put so much value on relationships and sex. They can both be great but not to the detriment of yourself.

Dial down the porn (maybe once a week and keep it within the realm of reality) and focus that unspent libido on yourself. Much better use of time than wasting time on women, they’re not that special or needed. Fine as a seasoning but more than that is setting yourself up to be put in a bad spot

[Anonymous No.18409210]

Bananas come in many different colors. I think this is fascinating. I wish I could purchase non-yellow bananas here in America but they are typically only grown and sold in exotic regions.

[Anonymous No.18409218]

>>18409210
based blue bananas

[Anonymous No.18409219]

>>18409142
Get ear plugs and noise cancelling headphones or go insane

[Anonymous No.18409226]

>>18409218
>The Blue Java is a hardy, cold-tolerant banana cultivar known for its sweet aromatic fruit, which is said to have an ice cream-like consistency and flavor reminiscent of vanilla.

[Anonymous No.18409234]

>>18409226
jesus that sounds heavenly

[Anonymous No.18409241]

living is starting to feel too tiresome. there's nothing left in my head or out of it to get excited about anymore and there hasn't been in a while. everything just feels draining

[Anonymous No.18409267]

>>18409241
Same. I feel like I'm simply trying to prolong this mediocre existence rather than do anything exciting.

[Anonymous No.18409275]

>>18407690
Im writing a book and Im worried it sucks.

[Anonymous No.18409300]

>>18409209
I get stuck in a cycle of binging. I'll go like a month barely jerking off at all and only to vanilla pictures of girls and then I'll hit a point where I'll go a week or two of being constantly horny jerking it to weird fetish shit. I understand that a gf won't solve my problems, but frankly I don't really have any problems other than not having a healthy sex life. I'm reaching the point in my mid 20s where all of my friends are starting to get longer term gfs who they spend a lot of time with and I'm just here seeing my social life slowly dwindle. I guess that's naturally going to happen but then I want what they have too. I haven't had any kind of long term interaction with a girl since college and the number of instances where I met a girl where I could pursue that with since college is like single digit.

[Anonymous No.18409518]

I feel like I've milked every last drop of joy out of life and without it I can feel my body shutting down

It's been so, so long since I was really happy, and everything I try to do to fix that just exhausts me and accomplishes nothing. Why can't god just let me feel it again

[Anonymous No.18409537]

i miss the feeling when my girlfriend gave me a blow job every day 7 years ago, it was so wonderful. such a beautiful girl, all i wanted to do was moan as i watched her do it, she just didn't stop until i came. it was pure luxury, she wanted it that way. oh man, I kinda miss her but after I found out that she slept with another guy in america, I called her a bitch, blocked her and never talked to her again. I was 21 and she was 18 back then. good ol' times...

[Anonymous No.18409544]

i miss the feeling when my girlfriend gave me a blow job every day 7 years ago, it was so wonderful. such a beautiful girl, all i wanted to do was moan as i watched her doing it, she just didn't stop until i came. it was pure luxury, she wanted it that way. oh man, I kinda miss her but after I found out that she slept with another guy in america, I called her a bitch, blocked her and never talked to her again. I was 21 and she was 18 back then. ah, good ol' times...

[Anonymous No.18409573]

the feeling was indescribably good, she tried so hard, she did it with love ... she wasn't a bitch, i shouldn't have called her that, she was a decent girl

[Anonymous No.18409581]

I actually went outside and did something today. Usually I never go out because I feel so off doing things alone. But I had a few insights lately. The first was that when I spend too much time alone I go insane. I spent the last month in mental agony and I couldn't realize why. I then met with some friends I keep at arms length and realized that all my angst was stupid. Being around others made me feel human.
The next thing I realized is that people just as anxious, nervous, and awkward as I am. So long as I put on an air of confidence I at least can make the appearance of social performance.
So I have decided that I will go out and do things, evem if I need to be alone. At least i'll be out and forming experiences, and with a little luck I can meet people and cultivate a social circle.

[Anonymous No.18409582]

we were both decent...

[Anonymous No.18409584]

There's an almost pornographic quality to the concept of eternal torture, not in that it is enjoyed but in that it is as raw an appeal to one's dislike of pain as pornography is to one's lust. Zero sentiment, pure senseless physicality.

[Anonymous No.18409606]

Just had to fucking screen record some porn because only that one shitty site had that one degenerate vid I wanted after they took it down almost everywhere.

[Anonymous No.18409611]

We both love each other...

[Anonymous No.18409619]

>>18409573
if she cheated on you in another country how decent could she be? she's the one who ruined it, not you

[Anonymous No.18409620]

>>18408523
>>18408580
>>18408600
>>18408665
this is the soundtrack to my ass bleeding guys :( ...this is how it feels, pray for me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A6LAIeoAlX4

[Anonymous No.18409626]

>>18407690
I can't believe the latest based and redpilled 4chan maymay is just pretending to lust after black men. Actually, I can believe it.

[Anonymous No.18409632]

>>18409626
>latest
mentally ill fags have been spamming this shit for years...

[Anonymous No.18409647]

>>18409620
why are we still here, just to suffer? every night, I can feel my ass...

[Anonymous No.18409683]

>>18409647
metal gear solid, stay strong comrade!

[Anonymous No.18409702]

they're coming

[Anonymous No.18409713]

>>18408626
>Who wants to see a hairy ass?
When you're a doctor and it is literally your job to see asses (hairy and non-hairy), it won't make that big a difference.
I don't think the doc gave a shit I had hair on my ass when I got a colonoscopy

[Anonymous No.18409735]

>>18409713
thanks, that calms me down a bit

[Anonymous No.18409746]

Why is it so hard to just pinpoint a passion hobby? Or at least something I could do for fitness which would be fun?

[Anonymous No.18409750]

You actually did it. You posted this thread with the ducks. Great job, Anon.

[Anonymous No.18409755]

>>18409746
You are Kirkegaarss aesthetic man

[Anonymous No.18409814]

>>18409750
thanks man

[Anonymous No.18409829]

I have a problem. I've been learning Japanese for a long time now but my listening skills are at a very basic level because, for lack of a better explanation, there's genuinely nothing I want to do with it. No TV shows I want to watch, no films, no streamers I care about. There are bands I like but after I memorize the songs I like the practice kind of stops there. All I give a shit about is reading so I'm pretty good at that, but when it comes time to listen to something I can pretty much grasp nothing. It's like the process itself is just frustrating at worst and boring at best. Yet I don't know how to fix it other than forcing it. I tried watching anime but it was just too boring. Maybe there's something out there for me though. I hope so

[Anonymous No.18409853]

i just picked up growth of the soil and read the first chapter. god damn i know its only a few pages but it is insanely comfy and for some reason i'm finding it very moving

[Anonymous No.18409968]

Babe, look, this petty affair has gone for too long I want u in my arms ASAP

[Anonymous No.18409989]

Ok wtf some of the hololive idol project songs are legit bangers

[Anonymous No.18409999]

I don't understand people watching anime past 6

[Anonymous No.18410071]

I'm in a good spot mentally right now. Just had another good day today, did some training, read a few chapters of the Odyssey, played volleyball with friends in the evening and the Habs swept the Jets.

But even at my best there's still this lingering feeling of unsatisfaction. When I was playing volleybal I had a few moments where I felt incredibly alone, like I was an intruder among the group. I think it's because there's a part of me that I have never really shared with anyone, a lack of intimacy. As i'm typing this, life feels bittersweet.

[Anonymous No.18410084]

Wrote this today.

1/1

Las Vegas. If Florida is manslaughter, Vegas is first-degree murder. The hoopleheads who populate the sweltering city streets move like a flock of birds caught in an endless murmuration, characterized by pockets of density and inevitable violence, themselves flanked by patches of inebriated but relative calm. I’ve never seen someone there that I’d rather be, not even the winners. A circus might be a more apt metaphor, but in this case there are no innocent patrons partaking in games of chance. The towering, reflective casinos, kept at a cold-inducing chill on the inside and reflecting triple digit heat on the outside, resemble ominous dominoes in the desert spaced dangerously close together. The shallow consumerism, grotesque and abusive sexual culture, and the profound self-delusion that characterize American society are no more visible than in this city.

But for all of its faults, you can’t help but admire this gleam in the desert’s eye. A mirage in an endless badlands, it is truly the embodiment of the capitalist spirit, a distillation of that which has propelled this country into first place. To experience Las Vegas is to look into the eye of the storm. The city is an ode to temporary insanity, driven by ignorance and disproportionate wealth. The only law is that one must spend money — and the enforcement of other, less important laws are in inverse proportion to how much one is willing to part with in table play.

Tragically, I fear the high watermark of Vegas has already come and go. The same way Thompson was able to perceive the receding of the hippie tide from the vantage point of Vegas, I’m afraid that I detect a weakening in its debaucherous spirit. Children pervade the city (always a sign of decline) and the genuine yet misplaced hope and optimism which once attracted middle-class aging men in droves to relive their college years for a weekend every year now feels like more of a resigned acceptance that one’s better days are behind them. I feel about as much intimidation and fear on the Strip as you might feel in an amusement park. The worst crimes I’ve witnessed recently have been crimes of fashion.

Where’s the organized crime? Where’s the sense of wonder? Frank Sinatra’s death was perhaps the greatest blow to this monument to artifice. Instead of intrigue and a mild sense of danger, the Vegas tourist is now greeted with 15 dollar draft beers and concerning levels of obesity.

[Anonymous No.18410096]

>>18410084

What the fuck? I posted this is another thread how did it show up here?

[Anonymous No.18410110]

I've recently been reading Marx and Dostoevesky, and I have been watching videos about Nihilism and Stirnirst Egoism (I will actually read the theory in due time). I think, as a consequence, I've become completely doomer-pilled and near suicidal.At the very least, I don't see the point in wageslaving anymore and I'm thinking of quitting, but I don't know what I'll do when or if I quit. I mean, I'd know what I'd do if I didn't have to work anymore—just read and write all day—but my savings won't last forever (~80k USD).

I think I'd be "happy" (not really but more so) if I can just get a job where I can do my job fairly easily and use the rest of my time to read. My current job's workload doesn't allow for that and the thoughts of suicide keep creeping into my head again and again at an alarming rate. I won't do it because of my gf and family, but it's getting worrisome.

I'm not naive enough to expect to find happiness in this world, but I don't remember being this depressed when I was younger. Maybe I shouldn't have picked up philosophy as a hobby; truly ignorance is bliss isn't it?

[Anonymous No.18410121]

Darker girls are a little more musky and tangy. I’ve only encountered slightly unpleasant odors from 30+ girls. The only two memorable ones were a girl who usually fucked black guys; her pussy smelled/tasted squiddy (she was like 25) Then I had this 33 year old milf who very clearly had just taken a som tam shit 15 minutes before she came over because her butthole smelled spicy when I was eating her pussy from the back. My nose was basically IN her butthole so obviously I smelled it, but even then, it wasn’t even mildly unpleasant; just noticeable. I’ve had some ACRID pussy in America; I blame the lack of bidets.

I also ate this girls asshole from dollhouse in the BJ booth before I fucked her and I had to spit some kind of crumb of something on the wall. I think it was toilet paper residue or a dingleberry. I just sanitized with gin and tonics after. I don’t recommend the BJ booth unless you’ve got rocket fuel viagra because it’s basically one step below exhibitionism

On the whole, never encountered an unpleasant odor. Just a bit of tangyness here and there which is quite refreshing; like ripe mango

[Anonymous No.18410123]

>>18410110
Part time jobs ftw.

[Anonymous No.18410127]

I would never eat ass

[Anonymous No.18410135]

>>18410110
see if your skills can be of use in a more rural setting (you would be surprise, small town need educated people too sometimes) and get some savings together to buy a bit of land and live a more simple and comfy life where you can actually connect with the world around you

[Anonymous No.18410144]

Mori spends 5% (it's actually more, 8.33%) of her day streaming.
She spends the other ~92% doing whatever she wants because her hard work brought her to a place where her dreams came true and she can focus entirely on what makes her happy. Writing music, recording, hanging with friends, getting comfortable as she moves, whatever her heart desires. All while getting blessed with a dedicated bunch of Deadbeats, who she adores.

[Anonymous No.18410174]

>>18410135
I actually prefer city life. American rural life sucks—too many reactionaries

[Anonymous No.18410195]

>>18410127
>I used to love nothing more than getting deep into that ass, but the older I get the less my immune system let's me enjoy it. Started with sore throats, after the last time I even felt sick to my stomach for 2 days. My ass eating days are over.

Why even live, /lit/tards?

[Anonymous No.18410201]

>>18410174
Get out of the US and move to a place where a man can live in peace.

[Anonymous No.18410203]

>>18410144
Shut the hell up nigga. The woman behind her avatar will NEVER love you.

[Anonymous No.18410212]

>>18410201
like?

[Anonymous No.18410218]

I have accounts on both Tinder and Bumble and the girls on Tinder are clearly and pointedly hotter than the girls on Bumble. It's not just that the girls on Tinder tend to be younger. The late 20s and early 30s girls on Tinder are hotter, too, compared to girls of that age on Bumble.

[Anonymous No.18410224]

I've been posting here for the past few weeks, reading. and exercising in my spare time. I decided to go check on a few other boards I occasionally visit. Its literally all buck breaking threads and content. What the fuck happened while I was away

[Anonymous No.18410225]

>>18410174
then kill yourself. just remember you had the option of not living the grating life of a soulless bugman that you knew deep down wasn't working for you

[Anonymous No.18410226]

>>18407690
I wonder how fucked and overinflated the market will become if buy/sell options will become a thing.

[Anonymous No.18410230]

>>18410224
Well, you know how "built for BBC" has been spammed everywhere on this site for like three years now, at least?

The perfect counter-meme to it has just fallen into our laps.

[Anonymous No.18410249]

>>18410212
I live on a Thai island, money I make online in Europe goes a long way here, people are courteous and happy, people do their jobs without thinking they deserve so much more, it's always summer,...

[Anonymous No.18410251]

>>18410174
This may come as surprise to you, but most people in rural areas either mind their own business, or are pretty friendly and outgoing, if you can manage not to be an ass. It does sound like you might struggle with that part though.

[Anonymous No.18410262]

>>18410249
Are thai people backwards reactionaries?

[Anonymous No.18410290]

>>18410262
No, relatively progressive, they are superstitious though.

[Anonymous No.18410294]

>>18410251
t.lying farmer. Rural people are xenophobic, jingoistic, undereducated and hostile to strangers (i.e. anyone not born in a 30 mile radius of them)

[Anonymous No.18410297]

>>18410294
>and hostile to strangers
t. someone who decided to be an ass

[Anonymous No.18410305]

>>18410294
>nooo topple who care about their communities and folk, how horrifying

[Anonymous No.18410307]

>>18408614
Start a blog

[Anonymous No.18410310]

what the fuck is buck breaking

[Anonymous No.18410319]

>>18410305
Yes the fucking
>topple
Is the problem in the countryside. Once they all have moved to the city and the villages are full of city folk enjoying retirement the countryside will be hospitable again. Read houllebecq - map and territory

[Anonymous No.18410324]

>gf making me come over again
>still has no internet
>wants to "do something together"
NOOOOOOOOOOO

[Anonymous No.18410335]

Music is so fun to listen to bros

[Anonymous No.18410352]

I blocked myself from every board except /lit/ because I found myself spending 3+ hours a day on this site, which is terrible when it could easily be spent reading one of the books I've yet to read/pirate.
Restricting myself to only the slower boards has been a great idea

[Anonymous No.18410370]

>>18408213
I won $100 from a writing contest in college. I bought rats with it

[Anonymous No.18410392]

I'm 19 but I feel bored with life, I'm a loser and I'm hoping reading more will help make my life better

[Anonymous No.18410408]

>I openly believe society and modern civilization will collapse within 30 years due to climate change
>I live an urban life, work in technology, and make no plans to develop survival skills
This is unironically me and I don't know if it's because on some level I'm still in denial, or if I deep down don't believe society is going to collapse.

[Anonymous No.18410418]

>>18410408
I have made sure that when the time comes I can be self reliant

I am pajeet but left that shithole with a checklist

Marry a christian russian lady who willingly will pop out children - check

Learn to fight - doing muay thai and wresling for 5 years

Learn to ride horse - check , I call my horse rehmat uWu

Learn to cook - check

Learn to swim - check

Learn to manipulate and trade at will - check

You can do it anon

[Anonymous No.18410454]

>Mori at the start of her career
"I'm so overwhelmed, thank you so much guys, I can't believe this. I'll work hard to be worthy of all these superchats!"

>Mori now
"Listen I can only give a shit about you fags for 5% of my day, be grateful I even give you guys that much time. Oh, Gigacuck is calling, sorry guys ending stream now"

What went wrong, bros?

[Anonymous No.18410465]

>>18410408
I honestly think tons of current and almost-ready technology is going to converge to save us from climate change. Direct air capture alone is a game changer. Fusion's going to be here within five years, too, so that's high-level carbon-free power taken care of. Not to mention the continued improvements in renewables.

The collapse that worries me is the collapse of the United States in some form of fashion. I don't think China is going to ever surpass the United States, but I DO think that at some point in the next half-century the current American-led order is going to break, and crumble. And this will be rather bad, because so much of the current geopolitical order of things is predicated on American hegemony. If America falters, EVERYTHING tumbles down, and it actually, genuinely might end modern civilization as we know it. It will be like the collapse of the Western Roman Empire.

[Anonymous No.18410555]

Since I moved abroad 3 years ago I noticed my writing ability has gone from above-average/good to poor. I'm losing syntax, vocabulary, and I'm losing even basic concepts of sentence structure. Are there any exercises I can do to build myself back up? Does anyone have any recommendations? I'm losing something I used to be quite good at and only because I'm no longer using the language I used to write in all that much (beyond some dull academic papers).

[Anonymous No.18410562]

>>18407826
University became a lot better for me when I stopped giving a fuck
I haven't been home in 3 years and spend most of my time at the gym or boxing, the only time I see the friends I've made here is incidentally when I'm drunk in town, it's fantastic. I'm going to get a PhD and live like a pleb king until the time to pay the toll comes

[Anonymous No.18410563]

>>18410465
t.brainwashed american
US "hegemony" is the number 1 destabilising factor in the world today. The best thing that can happen for the rest of the planet is for the US to crumble into the third world shit hole it Socially is already. Just have to hope their religious extremist don't get control of their insane arsenal of doomsday weapons they developed in their never ending paranoia while their system implodes.

Tl;dr: get fucked Yankee

[Anonymous No.18410566]

How we doing today lads? We good?

[Anonymous No.18410569]

>>18409162
Thank you fren. It was a little hectic but I got it done.

[Anonymous No.18410656]

>>18410174
I spent my late teens and early 20's living and working in two of the biggest cities in America, surrounded by "educated" and "progressive" yuppies/urbanites. Save for a few genuine people they're all the same beneath superficial differences of race or whatever unique traits they use to curate a personal image. Every interaction is calculated and every friendship is transactional, or at best one of convenience. You're not their peers, you're their competition. They'll stab you in the back the moment it benefits them in any way. When you have nothing to offer them or they gain an edge over you in terms of status, you're disposable trash. The upper echelons of personal and professional city life rewards narcissists with big egos and ruthless self-interest. I survived by learning to smile in front of snakes and the only thing saving me from insanity was finding relationships with people who manage to stay true to themselves in those soulless and rootless hell holes.

Rural people (as outsiders view them) don't actually exist. Rural America's a blend of farmland/small towns/exurbs. Even the "lowly" farmers actually preside over significant acreage and crops as well as a farm house, barn, and farm equipment like tractors and harvesters. Most of them have a net worth nearing or blowing well past a million dollars, do you think these all-day laborers are junkies?

Small towns are a mixed bag. Here you'll find the actual junkies and lost-job losers. They'll probably fit your "rural retard" monolith due to decaying communities. You can see it written all over town when you enter one, abandoned buildings, graffiti, terrible infrastructure, etc. These are where you see the ones who've gone off the deep end/live on the fringes. Decades of the government offshoring their jobs, decimating their economies, gutting their communities/culture, and then feeding negative stereotypes (see: >>18410294) have left behind an environment that makes them reactionary. As they should be - nobody should love a country whose people hate them and government spit on their faces. Urban dwellers cause brain drain through an exodus of moderate, young people and wonder why their former communities remain in decline upon return.

Exurbs, which are low-density suburbs on the edge of major cities, are comfy. Huge houses, several acres, gated communities, it's got a large entry fee (not usually as expensive as rural communities, but sometimes is) but you're going to find rich people there, small business owners and successful tradies and such. The people here tend to be like your normie center-of-right conservative who vote for people solely based on small government/low taxes - in other words, any Republican. They just want to live their lives and raise families in peace.

Unfortunately all the aforementioned places are full so you should remain in your urban paradise. You'll fit in just fine. Won't have to deal with the reactionaries after all right?

[Anonymous No.18410686]

>>18410418
>Marry a christian russian lady who willingly will pop out children - check

How'd you do it anon, did you have to actually go to Russia and court them somehow? Good strategies in your post btw

[Anonymous No.18410702]

>>18410686
we became room mates
then friends
then best friends
then started dating
then love
then marriage

[Anonymous No.18410703]

>>18410686
>How'd you do it anon, did you have to actually go to Russia and court them somehow?
Unfortunately, yes. Russian natashkas are too poor to go abroad.

[Anonymous No.18410739]

https://pastebin.com/4Qpygu7K

This is five pages from chapter 3 of a book I'm writing. Don't worry: I mention important parts at the start of the pastebin. You don't need to read the other chapters to get what is going on. I think it would be classed as urban fantasy/crime drama but please correct me if I'm wrong.

I need some feedback on characters, setting, and the magical elements.

>Stuff I need to know
>Would you be interested in reading more like this?
>What do you think of the bosses?
>Were each of them distinct enough?
>Is it clear and realistic what they do within the city?
>Do the magical elements work OK?
>Are they clear or confusing?
>Should I keep the magical elements in the story

[Anonymous No.18410796]

>You can’t own me! You can’t own me! I’m the little based goblin! I do my little dance! Oh I’m based!
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=m8tmCQUURiY&feature=youtu.be

[Anonymous No.18410813]

I did my first day of working in aged care. I want to to quit. How do I tell my mum I want to give up on it and not disappoint her.

I have no job. She wants me to move out. It will seem dumb if I quit. I don’t know what to do.

[Anonymous No.18410837]

>>18410813
>Animefag is a loser
Just try to get a work ethic. Use religion if you must. Read up on Protestantism. I’m sure there’s anime with that aesthetic, maybe something like Tanya the Evil.

[Anonymous No.18410856]

>>18410837
There’s a difference between work ethic and watching elderly people be systematically abused

[Anonymous No.18410866]

>>18410703
Wow, guess the trad Christian Russian waifu posts on /pol/ weren't entirely memes after all. Did you have to learn any Russian - and how did you find/approach them as a foreigner with no roots or connections in the region? Assuming it was your first time there.

[Anonymous No.18410874]

Samuel paused a moment, and his breath was hard and hot,
Panting, panting, breathing hard, he'd run for such a ways,
And at last he'd come then to a stop, and he at last
Took a moment, then, to stop, and catch his breath a bit.
Surely, surely, he had not been followed all this way.
Surely he had managed to evade the thing that had
Pursued him, its triple-trumpet baying on the breeze.
He had crossed the lakes and streams; 'twas sure this was enough.

Then upon his pale, wet neck, so soaked and drenched in sweat,
He could feel the sniffing and the breathing of the air
That came in, and out, and in, and out, and in, and out,
Breathing, sniffing, heavy, though there was no further noise,
As though the breath lived inside a vacuum, all alone.
And Samuel stood in place, a tremor through his frame.

As the big, black head came drifting over to his left,
With its long, long muzzle, and its long, long blackened jaws,
With its long snout, and those nostrils, long, atop its head,
And the shortened neck, so thick with muscle, and with strength,
Leading down to those great armored shoulders, and the plates
Of dark metal that swathed the great torso of the thing.
And the arms as well, those arms, so long, and muscular,
With their fingers three that ended in those long, long claws,
Long claws, hooked, serrated, sharpened to a killing edge.

Yet, now, as the beast came sidling up to him, it was
Its eyes that made Samuel near wet himself with fear,
Cold, cruel eyes--but bright as well. They gleamed a neon red,
The beast eyed him with its eyes of cold, cruel neon red.
And the monster fixed him with that cold, cruel neon stare,
Not blinking, its flat black pupils somehow empty, strange.

And the monster stared at him with cold, cruel neon eyes.
Then it gapped its jaws, and showed off all its sharp, white teeth.
Hell had come to earth, festooned in metal and in flesh.
Yet the creature waited--and this frightened him the most.

Until, at least, the heads of the other two appeared.
And now there were three black monsters, standing in his midst.
Coven-like, they crouched upon him. He did not know why.

[Anonymous No.18410893]

>>18407690
I came to this board to find interesting books to read but all I found are narcissistic wannabe smartasses either saying their single philosopher / book / idea is "the only one that matters" or some religious war between atheists and religious folks. This thread is one of the few jewels found in this fucking landfill. Thanks OP.

[Anonymous No.18410899]

>>18410893
So make your own thread and stop relying on other people.

[Anonymous No.18410904]

>>18410893
this, /wg/ and sci ffan general
rest is shit
I only go to generals on boards anyways
feels like /film/ will migrate here

[Anonymous No.18410927]

>>18410866
I'm not the original pajeet you were talking to.
>Did you have to learn any Russian - and how did you find/approach them as a foreigner with no roots or connections in the region?
Well, quite simply, I'm Russian myself. You don't have to learn Russian as you should find a girl who already speaks English at some level — chances are, a monolingual chick would be too scared or confused to do anything with you. Unfortunately, girls who speak English aren't Chrisitan, most of the time.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xZx0viOa0TA

[Anonymous No.18410953]

>>18407690
>order loot past sunday
>1/3 arrives all bent over
>me still mad
>me never buy from same library
>me wanna Farenheit 451 their business

[Anonymous No.18410955]

>>18409606
me on the pic

[Anonymous No.18410966]

>>18410310
>buck breaking
i think it's some kind of fag fantasy about white men fucking black twinks in the ass and stripping them of their masculinity and turning them into faggots (interesting idea if you ask me)? i think? from what i gather the book doesn't position itself as a fag fantasy though but it's definitely a covert fag fantasy

[Anonymous No.18410967]

>>18410955
left or right?

[Anonymous No.18410968]

>>18410856
>muh aboooose
Then change it from within uhhh

[Anonymous No.18410971]

>>18410966
>i think it's some kind of fag fantasy about white men fucking black twinks
written by a black male

[Anonymous No.18410979]

>>18410813
>>18410856
Do you at least get to fuck an old bastard?

[Anonymous No.18410988]

>>18410971
https://m.imdb.com/title/tt14266534/

[Anonymous No.18410995]

i want blacks to stop pretending being gay is a white man thing, their demographic has always been full of faggots kek

[Anonymous No.18410997]

>>18410995
t. Buck Breaking Cracker

[Anonymous No.18411007]

>>18410997
damn you got me

[Anonymous No.18411018]

>>18411007

[Anonymous No.18411032]

I have an inconvenient and painful anal fistula with no time for surgery. Feels like an insult from the gods especially when everything else in my life is going well.

[Anonymous No.18411041]

>>18411018
Hot

[Anonymous No.18411066]

>>18411032
Are you the anon from yesterday crying about bleedning asshole or /lit/ has number of bleeding assholes from all thay philfaggotry

[Anonymous No.18411070]

>>18411066
I'm not that guy but I was reminded of my situation because the ass bleeding posts.

[Anonymous No.18411073]

[Anonymous No.18411082]

>>18409814
put the "write" back in the OP where it belongs, you fucking asshole.

[Anonymous No.18411117]

i see we have started off the day with discussions of buck breaking and anal fistulae and bleeding assholes...

[newfag No.18411120]

>>18407690
I will never be an oldfag

[Anonymous No.18411123]

>>18411117
the literary life

[Anonymous No.18411133]

>>18409999
holy wasted digits batman

[Anonymous No.18411138]

FUCK, another day not being able to stop thinking about sex. What's wrong with me? This didn't happen in winter.

[Anonymous No.18411139]

>>18411133
holy wasted digits robin

[Anonymous No.18411145]

>>18409999
unholy well used digits joker

[Anonymous No.18411151]

>>18411138
why not jerk off? I try to be in a constant state of post-nut clarity.

[Anonymous No.18411154]

Does anyone have any good suicide stories? There's something comforting in reading about people who made it out of this world

[Anonymous No.18411184]

>>18411138
i also can't stop thinking about sex. sorry i will go on a rant here that has nothing to do with your post. it is so strange because i don't even watch porn, so i don't have a porn addiction, and i'm in a relationship where i have satisfying sex, so what the fuck, i'm 24, almost 25, i should be able to control myself by now, but no, i'm reading a historical book right now about some historical figures i'm interested in and i just can't take it because there's some sexual stuff mentioned that is hot to me and it makes me so fucking horny, i know this subject i am reading about has become my special interest only because it turns me on, i am so simple and predictable. i perceive everything through a sex lens. i'm writing a novel and the main drive behind it is obviously my sexual arousal too, although i narratively try to hide it and it doesn't come off like that in the book but i wouldn't be writing about all that shit if it didn't turn me on. i'm just so fucking dumb and i can't ever look at things neutrally my brain always goes sex sex sex. and all the people around me perceive things neutrally which seems like unattainable intellectual prowess to me, what a bunch of fucking intellectuals i'm the only one who's like sex sex sex, 24/7, horny horny horny. i don't feel like it's bad but i don't think it is normal. maybe it is my autistic paraphilia?

[Anonymous No.18411211]

I've been working on an African epic fantasy for about a decade. Went in-depth with the worldbuidling, con-langs, researching Africa pre-colonization. It was going to be a gamechanger. But the market is now flooded by twitter-trannies who make everything about black power and how Africa wasn't underdeveloped and it was the same and everything was magical and everybody was prosperous. No. I am African. This is false. Though it wasn't just mudhut and sticks Africa had a unique setting to it. Now when I'm querying everybody thinks it's problematic because it has a bit of a darker tone. I am so pissed. The only person to get away with the same tone I have is Marlon James but that's because he was a Booker Prize winner. I am genuinely mad and giving up now. Fuck me I hate these woke black fucks in Europe and Africa. They fucked over real African writers.

[Anonymous No.18411212]

>>18411154
my sister's best friend commited suicide not long ago. she seemingly had everything going for her, a nice bf, good modelling job (one of the best looking girls I knew personally) and good results at university. all of a sudden, she's gone with no-one expecting it, she also had a twin sister, can't imagine how hard it is for her.
nothing comforting about that

[Anonymous No.18411232]

I bawled tonight, thinking of Jesus in the Garden of Gethsemane. Knowing what He was going to go through, the suffering He was going to endure. Praying to the Father to take it away from Him.

Someone should have been there with Him. I can't believe Peter, James, and John fell asleep. It's not fair. He didn't deserve to spend so many hours alone in suffering and grief. Not when there was so much worse to come. At the very least He deserved to have someone be there, so He wasn't alone.

Though I suppose, as Scripture says, angels came and comforted Him. Still, it feels like a great failure. Someone human should have stayed up with Him, made it so He wasn't alone. After all He had done for us, and was going to do, it's the least that one of us could have done.

[Anonymous No.18411234]

>>18411211
It sucks anon, I feel the same. I'm working on a novel where half of the characters are black and I was already working on it before the woke craze, but now I feel like culturally we are not at a moment where I can publish it. Are you black or white living in Africa?

[Anonymous No.18411244]

>>18411151
that always makes me lazy afterwards, need to do some stuff today
>>18411184
I mean, it might very well be pretty normal, actually

[Anonymous No.18411394]

>>18411151
I just fapped and I feel terrible. I need to quit.

[Anonymous No.18411447]

As a favor to a work friend I am covering a morning shift after a year of living dusk to dawn. By the time this is over I will have been awake for 24 hours
As I have to maintain a nocturnal schedule, go to school 3 to 9, and work graveyard tomorrow, I will have to spend another 24 hours awake to reset my sleep cycle.
The caffiene I am wired on will decay soon. The world will take on an acidic, abrasive light, like the color saturation on my eyes got amped to a sickening degree.
If I am very unlucky, the audiovisual hallucinations will spring up again. Last time it was the audio to Boschs depiction of Hell.

[Anonymous No.18411464]

I wish I could maintain a laid back, devil may care attitude all the time.

[Anonymous No.18411466]

>>18409829
Watch the news then.

[Anonymous No.18411475]

>>18411447
That's bad for you. You should find a way to skip and sleep, or at least get some REM sleep in between.

[Anonymous No.18411507]

>>18411475
Oh horrible for me. I may do something like taking a nap when my shift is over then trying to sleep when I normally would.
I wouldnt have thought of that without you, Anon. Thank you, I was going to take my march into that horrid realm of sleeplessness, but I can do it smarter

[Anonymous No.18411557]

hope i die soon

[Anonymous No.18411566]

I want to HUG you

[Anonymous No.18411569]

>>18411557
nooo...

[Anonymous No.18411636]

I bought a bad watermelon man. you could see it was bad already in the store but I was blind to it at the time. this sucks.

[Anonymous No.18411642]

>looking for a job
>send CV's
>see an unknown number calling
>just looking at the screen and hoping it will stop without ever picking up or even recalling later
i'm just a loser

[Anonymous No.18411697]

>>18411642
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjPhzgxe3L0

[Anonymous No.18411699]

>>18411642
just get drunk and call them back

[Anonymous No.18411701]

>>18411636
Why didn't you knock on it?

[Anonymous No.18411719]

>be blue collar
>every other day "you got a missus yet young fella?"
>not yet haha
>I'm actually with another young fella

[Anonymous No.18411748]

>>18411701
honestly a guy working at the store was being chummy and he pointed to a couple of melons and said I needed to choose with my a heart, and this one was kind of bright green and I just went with it. now I'm wondering if he knew this one was shit and was trying to throw me off. if he did it worked. but it's probably a coincidence.

[Anonymous No.18411783]

I'm an ESL and realizing I have no idea where to put apostrophes.. it's confusing.
If something belongs to Ema, it's Ema's;
If it belongs to *it*, it's its;
What if it belongs to a company of multiple people, is it the company's?
them -> theirs, right?
It's probably trivial, but weird

[Anonymous No.18411792]

>>18411719
>I'm actually with another young fella
isn't that gay?

[Anonymous No.18411796]

>>18411719
my based gay brother

[Anonymous No.18411818]

>>18411792
I'm pretty straight for a faggot. Something went wrong with my brain and I started thinking of cute guys as girls

[Anonymous No.18411820]

i'm so paranoid that someone is gonna make the genius work of art i'm thinking of BEFORE I DO

[Anonymous No.18411824]

>>18411783
Its and it's is the main irregular you'll encounter and it trips up plenty of adult native speakers too. Just remember that 'it's' is 'it is' and you'll be fine.

The rest is correct.

[Anonymous No.18411826]

>>18411820
Then you better get cracking faggot

[Anonymous No.18411833]

>>18407690
Woe is me, losing my hair. At least there's fin..

[Anonymous No.18411846]

What are you listening?

[Anonymous No.18411849]

>>18411826
thanks for the motivation, i am working on it right now

[Anonymous No.18411866]

>>18411846

[Anonymous No.18411877]

I want to have sex with a woman. I want to have sex with a woman, love and be worthy of love and finally go on with my life with renewed vigor and meaning. I want to be kind, funny, strong, intelligent, witty and dependable and I don't want to want to kill myself everyday because the voice that knows me better than anyone calmly comes to the conclusion that it's the only rational thing to do. I want to be in another skin with another soul, not a retarded, abominable freak and live outside my head indefinitely and actually join the human race

[Anonymous No.18411878]

>>18411818
cute guys are pretty much girls but even better

[Anonymous No.18411908]

Was just thinking how much I'd like to have the ability to freeze time at will.
>Alarm goes off but you're still tired
FREEZE. Enjoy as much sleep as you'd like. Better yet you could freeze time right as you went to bed, sleep a full 8 hours in what is actually a millisecond, and have the whole night to do as you please.
>Bored at work or school?
FREEZE. Enjoy your 2 hour break.
>Running late?
FREEZE. Not anymore.
You could also use it for nefarious things too I suppose ( theft, creeping on hot girls, various acts of trickery) but man it would be useful. You could get so much done.

[Anonymous No.18411919]

i remember the guy at the meditation retreat in the netherlands who had a porn addiction like me and i tried to help him.. i didn't get his contact... i don't have a porn addiction anymore i wonder how he is doing right now

[Anonymous No.18411960]

>>18411919
also there was another guy there who i met in london again sometime later and we talked a lot about porn addiction too cause he had one as well kek and also we talked his adhd and my autism. we had such a fun time then when i went back to paris we called each other a lot. i i hate that i lose my phone contacts so easily and because i don't have any social media whatsoever i don't know where these people are now and i have no way to know

[Anonymous No.18411961]

>>18407826
get on that anti-balding shit hair loss is largely preventable these days

[Anonymous No.18411971]

It was not part of their gender,
It came to them in heat
With hard cocks to make tender
When the Jannie began to delete.

They were not easily pleased,
They were bitchy -- willing to beat
Till every post should be squeezed,
Ere the Jannie began to delete.

Their voices were manly and low.
Their eyes 'neath brow meat.
There was neither sign nor show
When the Jannie began to delete.

It was not preached to the surgeon.
It was not taught by the tweet.
No man called them a virgin
When the Jannie began to delete.

It was not biologically bred.
It will not care for feet.
Through the dead board ahead,
When they shall cut off their meat
That the Jannie began to delete.

[Anonymous No.18412043]

>>18408167
ornament is crime
get some plants

[Anonymous No.18412051]

porn is my antidote. when I wake up, I have some kind of hole in my head, for years. now that I start watching porn again it helps a lot with it. I feel pretty normal afterwards, with a clear mind. everyone who's talking shit about porn either don't know this bad feeling or is in deep denial. I don't even watch hardcore or fetish stuff. just the usual bitches. it's cool man

[Anonymous No.18412087]

>>18412051
I'm saying this without any malice. Get laid. Like for real.

[Anonymous No.18412103]

It's ok. It's going to be ok. I believe in you.

[Anonymous No.18412173]

>>18407690
How do you deal with invasion?

[Anonymous No.18412174]

>>18412051
it's bad for your brain chemistry bitch

[Anonymous No.18412188]

i live in france and fucking hate muslim faggots ugghhhhh dieeee, i'm not even right wing but i can't fucking stand them, the most useless, stupid piece of shit demographic in this country

[Anonymous No.18412189]

>>18412087
I will, I could, there's even a chick that wants to meet with me but I don't have any interest. I know I could fuck irl but I don't want to. I have other things on my mind but the main reason is, that I feel like shit because my ass is bleeding... yes I'm the guy. I can't sleep for 5-7 years and now this shit, fuck my life. The thing is, I also live where a lot of traffic is and my windows are pretty shitty, little noise reducing, can't even sleep at daytime, and I have depts, I don't feel like a normal person anymore, but that's ok, it is what it is. I realized I need porn but get trough this tuff times, it's something else man, I just wanna do my thing, chicks are irrelevant

[Anonymous No.18412212]

>>18412189
to get trough this tuff times*

[Anonymous No.18412220]

Shall I?

[Anonymous No.18412224]

>>18407699
extremely based. I am a maths/physics guy mostly lurking /g/ or /sci/ but for some reason all the humanities people i know assume I am a literary retard simply because I am good with maths. Well-roundedness is really the issue.

[Anonymous No.18412241]

>>18412224
This is a problem with contemporary "specialization" autism that has infected academia. All the Greeks were multi-faceted types that practiced an array of skills and were never limited. Granted, the concept of "careers" was alien to them as well as we mostly live now to serve fiat currency and participate in its abstractions.

[Anonymous No.18412250]

>>18412224
math/physics guys are to arrogant, I don't like them. they feel so smart, but they aren't, yo man you're not superior as you think you are and also fuck everyone who is talking shit about /lit/ and is still here.

[Anonymous No.18412334]

>>18411846
https://youtu.be/aK4JSwhdcdE

[Anonymous No.18412337]

>>18412250
>yo man you're not superior as you think you are
Pretty sure he is.

Not knowing math in 2021 is like not knowing how to read in 1621.

[Anonymous No.18412346]

>>18407699
Someone lost an argument

[Anonymous No.18412357]

>>18412337
not really

[Anonymous No.18412363]

>>18407826
I keep seeing this sentiment all over the place online; don't go to college, learn a trade, stay out of debt, etc. But my parents already expect me to go. I haven't enrolled yet but if things work out then by the end of the week I'll be enrolled into an IT program; I'm only going to college in hopes of getting a career to making a living, I don't have any aspirations or anything

[Anonymous No.18412511]

>>18407909
Love is much bigger and better than politics anon. My gf has complete opposite political views to me and I have fun Banting with her about her beliefs, I simply don’t find it important compared to how much we love each other.

[Anonymous No.18412514]

>>18412224
hey man, it's me again, I briefly caught some fresh air outside and now I feel better. not all mathematicians and physicists are arrogant, there are also good ones. and yes, science is very important, I don't want to deny that, but you should learn to respect other people from time to time. i think a lot of young people have a problem with that. in any case, I am grateful for what you do, you are something special and we need you. It's not that I don't like you guys, I just have enough stress myself right now because of my ass, it fucks with my mind but I am stronger.

[Anonymous No.18412526]

>>18409999
Holy digits of truth

[Anonymous No.18412579]

>>18407690
I want to start writing but I don't care about literature on its own. I like other mediums more (like movies or comics) because I feel like they can convey emotions much better than words on their own, but at the same time I know I'm not the kind fo person that can work on a creative project with others (so screen writer and similar shit are out) and I don't have the talent to do something like a comic by myself. So I'm gonna start writing because I think that it's the only realistic way I can get my stories across.

[Anonymous No.18412619]

I got the coffees...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s8zbXfIiVwg

[Anonymous No.18412621]

All I can think about is how unsatisfied I am sexually. We used to have sex 2 times a day every day over Christmas break. now that I’m back from college for the summer we only have sex every other day, every time we do have sex I’m the one initiating and she is never enthused when I ask for a blowjob, most of the time turning me down. Idk maybe it’s because she just started birth control. I just don’t feel as desired sexually and it’s a really shitty feeling for me. I asked her and she said it was because that was our honeymoon period so it was obvious that we were going to have sex more often. I don’t really feel like that’s a good excuse it’s all just feels like a construct to try and normalize things that are wrong . She seems perfectly happy in the relationship and everytime I ask whether I’m meeting her needs she says of course and that she’s really happy. The only problem is that I’m not and I know relationships aren’t all about sex, I’ve heard that too many times but I can’t shake the feeling of being desired less. I just don’t feel desired, and I really grace that feeling but she doesn’t offer it anymore. It’s not like I’m going to break up with her over it. I love her too much for that plus we plan on living together. I just don’t know wtf to do

[Anonymous No.18412651]

>>18412621
It's the pills + you're an addict

[Anonymous No.18412688]

thank god i'm a skater otherwise I would have ended it already. all the shit that has happened to me in my life and yet I haven't gone crazy. and I don't think about sex all the time either. I didn't become addicted to drugs even though it looked like it was going to happen. thank you god. most of you have no idea ... change yourselves before it's too late.

I'm not healthy but I hope that I will be healthy soon. the problems with my ass... my constant tiredness... no job... debts... no girlfriend and I'm happy anyways. the devil won't win.

that's some real shit right here...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZG6zsHUCum4

[Anonymous No.18412691]

pray for me

[Anonymous No.18412701]

>>18407690
Humor is a verbalization of a perceived imperfection in life, usually comprising of a subtle assault against human concepts of perfection, goodness, or innocence, delivered with social grace, pushing the boundaries of situational expectation but never exceeding into deviant territory.

[Anonymous No.18412729]

Can you post anything on this shit board anymore without janny tranny seething for no reason?

[Anonymous No.18412737]

>>18412691
My pleasure.

[Anonymous No.18412739]

I turn 25 in a month and my life is going nowhere.

[Anonymous No.18412758]

I picked up a book in a language i am currently learning.
I bought it when i was Beginner level A2 and enjoyed reading it because it taught me grammar, expressions, proper use of past forms, etc. The story was intersting and very deep.
I put the book aside for a while to read other things and work on other stuff, meanwhile my language skills had become better and more fluent.
I started reading it again now where i am Intermediate B1-B2 and i just cant understand how i thought this book was that great.
Its no longer interesting amd deep to me, more less pseudointellectual and reddit. I used to enjoy the book, but i dont know why.
I find it odd that something becomes less profound if you take away the layers of complexity it wraps itself in, although its logical.
Im not going to say which book it was because i think that would create a bias, i just wanted to write about this experience.

[Anonymous No.18412759]

>>18412739
Are you me?

[Anonymous No.18412775]

>>18412621
it might be the birth control. many women report lowered libido over birth control. it depends on the pill itself and the individual. does the change chronologically correlate with her starting to take birth control in a way where you can definitely say it's linked? women who don't take the pill and aren't depressed/drug addicts usually do not experience random downward spikes in libido.

>I asked her and she said it was because that was our honeymoon period so it was obvious that we were going to have sex more often.

see this is the problem i have here, people say women have lower libido as the relationship progresses, it's a complete myth. women have super high sex drive, they are freaks. but many people use excuses when they are afraid to directly confront their partner. i really think that you should have a real discussion with her if you haven't already, but also i'll give you one very meaningful piece of advice, which is a little manipulative so do not overuse it : stop initiating sex. first of all she will wonder what is the problem, and really think about whether she did hurt you in some way, then she will stop dismissing discussions and she will willingly talk to you. second, she will actually feel a bit insecure and sexually frustrated, just like you are right now, and so she will initiate sex herself. also, the sex will be better because she will want it more. if people don't desire you, generally speaking, you should never push it. only when people feel like they can't take you for granted, they really start to desire you back.

also, one last thing, do you guys practice your sex fantasies together or do you just mechanically fuck?... maybe you should talk about what both of you want from sex? maybe she has some secret kink, or simply wants you to sexually behave in a certain specific way, but didn't tell you because she is too shy?

[Anonymous No.18412776]

>>18412758
What book?

[Anonymous No.18412779]

>>18412739
what would you tell your 24 yo self (I'm 24 in two weeks)

[Anonymous No.18412790]

>>18412739
>>18412759
i turn 25 in october boys, it hurts :')

[Anonymous No.18412794]

>>18412776
Doesnt matter
Let it be any mediocre post-war boomer book written by a lost westener, but in another language

[Anonymous No.18412798]

>>18412779
telling your younger self something is nonsense

[Anonymous No.18412843]

>>18412779
i'd tell 24 year old me that life is still amazing and dreams still do come true and that he will finally get into a relationship after 6 years of being single and his work will develop in a meaningful way but also it it will never stop being difficult and he will go through phases of depression and insanity because his brain is fucked up like that and when you want to constantly become better you're never in your comfort zone so it fucking hurts all the time, but he should just keep moving forward, and sit on his ass a little less, oh and browse 4chan less, lazy piece of shit. that's what i'd tell him.

[Anonymous No.18412867]

>>18412779
I'd tell him to go back and talk to his 18 yo self because 24 yo me is already beyond help. But to 18 yo me: get a real degree, get a job any job, leave your girlfriend, try to actually enjoy college, and take a vacation to the big city to get it out of your system rather than move there 4 years later.

[Anonymous No.18412893]

>>18412739
I'm 32 and my life is going nowhere :)

[Anonymous No.18412899]

>>18412867
>because 24 yo me is already beyond help.
projection, pls leave this board, there is no place for negativty and narcissism or your pseudo bullshit, not everybody wants your fucking shit. people like you are the problem, because they want to restrict others (because they gain more power by doing so)

>>18412779
fucks sake, just do what your want and don't listen to others

[Anonymous No.18412910]

Went to bed last night feeling godawful but woke up this morning feeling like it’s all going to pan out and I could conquer the world. Is this bipolar disorder or do I need to stop going to bed dehydrated?

[Anonymous No.18412913]

>>18412899
>thinks all self negativity by others is an attack on himself and a restriction of unnamed others
thats not just projection that's nearly psychosis kek

[Anonymous No.18412922]

>>18412910
Yea

[Anonymous No.18412923]

>>18412910
I used to be like this too; some days I felt like I could seize life by the balls and other days I wanted to lay down and die; made getting anything done very difficult. I stopped eating sugar and my mood stabilized immensely (also I felt better physically) and I stopped masturbating to porn and only masturbate once a week now, and that helped a lot too

[Anonymous No.18412930]

>>18412928

[Anonymous No.18412949]

>>18412913
turning others down and contradicting them even though they had no evil in mind is a cheap way to upgrade yourself to gain power

>>18412779
just do what you want

[Anonymous No.18412987]

>>18412775
Thanks mate, this actually helps. I’ve actually been thinking about not initiating sex this past week, with no reason behind it. I just intuitively think it will help for some reason, but you sorta helped clarify why that’s a good thing. Also we don’t just mechanically fuck, we have practiced our fantasy before but it’s been a lot less recently.

[Anonymous No.18413008]

>>18412775
If it’s birth control then how do I address that? Just tell her to stop taking birth control because she’s not as horny as me?

[Anonymous No.18413078]

>>18411961
what anti-balding shit? There's some medicines that claim to work but the side effects look terrible

[Anonymous No.18413192]

>>18413008
Frame it as an issue of her safety (which it is). I'm sure you can find any number of articles/testimonials showing its harmful effects on mood and etc.

[Anonymous No.18413230]

>>18410392
For the love of God get off thsi fucking website and go outside before it's too late

[Anonymous No.18413241]

>>18410408
A contradiction in behaviour does not amount to a contradiction in belief.

[Anonymous No.18413254]

>>18410656
Really nice evaluation. Being an accomplished person living in an exurb is comfy, but being the child of one growing up in an exurb sucks. Actually being a kid and growing up anywhere seems really shitty these days

[Anonymous No.18413266]

>>18410813
>works one day
>already gives up
Quitter. At least take community college classes, get some kind of certification or learn a fucking trade. You're going to have to work so stop bitching about it

[Anonymous No.18414588]

>>18410813
there is no way to not disappoint her because you are a disappointment. there is no way around that