write what’s on your mind

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write what’s on your mind Anonymous Fri Mar 5 22:49:35 2021 No.17708528 [Reply] [Original]

i’d love to know

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 5 23:07:50 2021 No.17708641 I miss my grandfather

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 5 23:09:53 2021 No.17708653 >>17708528 If you truly love something you have to let it go, for if it comes back it was always yours, but if it doesn’t then it never was

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 5 23:16:18 2021 No.17708696 >>17708653 Sounds like something a thief would say

>>	Anonymous Fri Mar 5 23:48:07 2021 No.17708893 >>17708528 i haven't been able to sleep for my entire life and i'm gonna kill myself because i can't live like this

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 00:19:41 2021 No.17709065

No, my name is Syd. No, my name is Arturo. No, my name is Ana. No, my name is 大友. No, my name is Graham. No, my name is Wayne. No, my name is قسطنطين. No, my name is كماني. No, my name is McDonald's. No, my name is Vartan. No, my name is M. No, my name is Haffiz. No, my name is Itoh. No, my name is Chino. No, my name is PlayStation. No, my name is Hongjun. No, my name is Antoine. No, my name is 무키. No, my name is Վարդան. No, my name is Dadaloğlu. No, my name is Sədi. No, my name is Глaхo. No, my name is Aшyкь. No, my name is مرضیه. No, my name is Նարինե. No, my name is Mala. No, my name is Niccolò. No, my name is Jali. No, my name is Ousmane. No, my name is Girma. No, my name is Chiquinha. No, my name is Mustapha. No, my name is 殷. No, my name is မောင်ကိုကို. No, my name is 如子. No, my name is Mauro. No, my name is Annea. No, my name is Zsolt. No, my name is Yannick. No, my name is Ὅμηρος. No, my name is No, my name is.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 00:38:56 2021 No.17709177 >>17708528 i fell in love with someone awhile back and my life has not been the same ever since. mostly in the worse way. using the cliche phrase, it leaves a void, and i just want to fill it somehow.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 00:44:22 2021 No.17709200 I am liking these wwoym pictures recently.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:06:13 2021 No.17709278 i had a protein shake with a protein cookie for dinner and then coffee for desert and now my stomach does not feel well

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:18:47 2021 No.17709337 Love. Or rather the absence of it. I say to myself than even older people than me are capable of finding their first love but thar doesnt take the uneasiness away.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:22:00 2021 No.17709355 File: 151 KB, 513x800, 8B78C990-55CB-471F-AB04-4527E4A5AF1E.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17709200 :’)

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:22:10 2021 No.17709357 Share some jams https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xtceBRVjV2I

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:25:03 2021 No.17709373 >>17708653 You just reposted the lyrics from a switchoot song, I see right through you, anon

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:29:07 2021 No.17709391

>>17708528
I’m older than all of you. Almost 50.
What is on my mind is that Millennials on the whole are really shitty people and even my Zoomer kids hate them and tell me they ruined everything before they were able to enjoy life. I’m afraid they are the “Fourth Turning” and their incompetent narcissism will destroy Western Civilization. They cannot bear the crown.

INB4 poor Boomer, I’m well off and a GenX technically

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:29:55 2021 No.17709393 I feel violated desu

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:31:29 2021 No.17709400 >>17709393 what’s going on, anon?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:32:03 2021 No.17709402 >>17709391 >Millennials on the whole are really shitty people Not sure how anyone comes to the conclusion that an entire generation is shitty I see this take a lot and I don't get where it comes from

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:33:21 2021 No.17709410 File: 168 KB, 220x124, tenor[1].gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17709391

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:35:57 2021 No.17709423
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Tell your mom you love her and that you remember something special she said to you or did with you in the past right now

Regularly show your mom that you notice her love for you, and that she is as special to you as you are to her. Moms are easy to make happy. You just have to show her that you appreciate her. Reminder to forgive your mom if she's flawed and be the bigger man. Even if she's been a bad person, do your best to forgive her and heal her, instead of continuing the circle of hate and spite.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:37:00 2021 No.17709432

>>17709402
it’s a rich person thing, i think. they only fraternize with other rich retards and their parasitic children so the leech children have opinions on boomers and the leech gen x/boomers have gay opinions on millennials and zoomers because when you all share a class not much else differentiates you but “DOH MY SPOILED CHILD LOVE THE PHONE SCREEN OF THE PHONE I GOT HIM” and “DOH MY RICH WRINKLY MOM SCREAMS AT TARGET EMPLOYEES” the only ones who are invested in generational warfare are cancerous to society in my experience

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:39:26 2021 No.17709443 >>17709423 Good advice Unless she's legitimately an evil person Still that's kinda rare Most people who call their mom a narcissist are in the wrong

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:41:18 2021 No.17709453
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>>17709423
I forgot about dads. Dads are even easier to please. Just tell him you think he's cool and admire him. Tell him you bragged about some cool shit he did to your bros. Dads love that. There is literally nothing better in the world than doing a hobby with your dad, like building stuff together.

>>17709443
I agree, and often it's both parties being shitty. There's a delicate balance to forgiving without being a doormat. There is a higher kind of forgiveness, where you realize people's limitations and try to help them even though technically you don't "have" to.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:46:07 2021 No.17709473 just wrote four lines of code. big time productivity going on.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:47:22 2021 No.17709476 >>17708653 You must be at least 30 to shitpost here, son

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:49:10 2021 No.17709484 >>17709473 If you're a woman I believe the next step in the ritual is to tweet about it as if you've been doing it for years, change your twitter tagline to something like "coder girl.", and start having opinions about gender representation in coding.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:50:18 2021 No.17709488

My sister has become a junkie.

She was already on a bunch of prescription anti-depressants, a Klonopin addiction that goes back three years. Since she moved to LA she started doing cocaine and ketamine. Oh and weed. She is living with a man who is using her for her small inheritance she receives each month. Last time we talked she was just a broken glass version of herself where one lie on top of another managed to obscure that the real her was no longer even there. She abandoned our father and me, for a bag of dope in a strange town with a man who couldn’t stand on his own.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:51:41 2021 No.17709492 >>17709473 i am not being productive either. i have shirked grading in favor of bitching and moaning about my headache and making posts. i hope you get a few more lines done tonight fren and also that it compiles. i will grade tomorrow.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:56:15 2021 No.17709504

I ran a man over with my truck in a K-mart parking lot. I meant to scare him but he was just sucked under the front before I was able to brake. He went under the tires. I felt the sickening thump when the rear tire rolled over him. Then he got up and ran away. I didn’t believe it was possible. He was black and I didn’t stop because I didn’t want people to think I was racist. With the darkness and rain I couldn’t even tell that he was black.
Nobody will believe me here so I feel it’s safe to unload this.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 01:56:27 2021 No.17709506

I want to find some really interesting drug trip stories. Not the ones about people just seeing spiders everywhere, but the ones where people think they have some huge revelation and even long after still believe they discovered something, or they describe something incredible. This isn't because I have a desire to do drugs, I just find some of the stories fascinating.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:04:50 2021 No.17709539 I am working in a convenience store while I am in college. It’s in a minority area near campus and between shoplifters, blunt wraps and being yelled at I fear I am becoming racist and I don’t want to be.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:11:58 2021 No.17709571 >>17709506 https://erowid.org/experiences/exp_list.shtml

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:13:15 2021 No.17709575 >>17709571 What are some of the craziest?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:15:47 2021 No.17709584 [DELETED]

>>17709539
One time I was in the 7/11 by my work, and there were these super high dudes harassing the old Pakistan man working the counter. They were pretty scary because it was obvious they were so stupid that they could kill you and then feel legitimately surprised when they are arrested for murder later. I felt so bad for that dude.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:33:17 2021 No.17709699 [DELETED]

>>17709575
A lot of the really crazy stuff can't even be remembered and doesn't make sense to non-trippers. One morning after a long night of tripping super hard, I remember getting into this weird loop where every train of thought would loop around. It made total sense, but now I can't even remember what the topics were, just that no matter what I tried to think about would be same as whatever I was thinking of before. It might have been like one of those things where people say they experience the unity of all things, but for me it was like all thoughts are fundamentally the same idea. I don't know. Sounds crazy now, and my memory of it faded fast like a dream.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:36:10 2021 No.17709722 >>17708528 I fucking hate it when anons post the next general when the current general is still active

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:37:58 2021 No.17709730 >>17709722 I feel you, but it hit the bump limit, so anything you post there is going to be gone any minute, and it will probably 404 while you are writing some efforty thing.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:40:13 2021 No.17709740 >>17709730 No, i hate it when they make the general prematurely. Kills the discussion.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:42:33 2021 No.17709753 >>17709740 I think people have been doing it early to beat that fetish guy who has been putting wack shit in the pic.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:43:17 2021 No.17709756 >>17709575 https://erowid.org/experiences/exp.php?ID=92059 i think this one is my favorite. it has been a long time since i have browsed erowid. datura, dmt, lsd, ayahuasca, iboga are all fun.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:43:18 2021 No.17709755 >>17709753 Based

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:44:33 2021 No.17709760 >>17709753 I still can’t get over the fact that people, adults, are bothered by the op pics.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:51:06 2021 No.17709789 >>17709177 Do something creative. That person probably brought out a more colorful side of you. And now that she's gone you also lost that other side that you never saw before. And you miss it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:57:41 2021 No.17709812 >>17709760 Shut up you yellow-toe-sucking fag

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:58:44 2021 No.17709815 >>17709753 Based indeed...

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 02:59:49 2021 No.17709818

I didn't write in my journal tonight because I don't feel like it. I have written in my journal nearly every day for almost five years. Tonight, I think I may stop. It has become a chore that I don't have to do. My life hasn't really changed in those five years except in the most banal way. Nothing truly interesting happened, and it usually became a place to vomit words and feelings in. Accomplishing nothing but making me feel worse.

I still plan on keeping a small notebook but instead of my daily activities I'll write whatever comes to mind that I want to remember. My journal was a large sketchbook so I may actually take up sketching.

I'm a bit remiss to let it go, though. Like I'm going to regret it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:01:50 2021 No.17709823 >>17709818 do what picasso did on his bad days and scribble a butt into it

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:04:08 2021 No.17709831 >>17709722 Cry more bitch nigger

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:04:15 2021 No.17709832 >>17709760 Please leave

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:12:24 2021 No.17709856
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>>17708528
Today I realized how peaceful my neighborhood, in which I grew up and lived for 24 years, really is. As if I had never noticed this quality in it. As if it had always escaped me due to my habit of living inside of my head, and entertaining the endless whirlwind of thoughts that occurs to me at every minute, only trying to feed them with more information and speed up the engine of their generation. My routine has been completely obliterated much prior to the quarantine's start last year, and now I just live day to day, enjoying the entertainment of my own musings and ideas, as a true autismo that I've always been born to be, living into the hallucinations of my own mind, talking to myself, arguing against myself, listening to music and being an useless shit. My sleep schedule had been completely destroyed and I was on 24 hours of sleep deprival, not a lot, just enough to leave you with the sweet light inebration of an early-hours-of-the-night-drunk.

I went with my mom to the grocery store, only to notice that, despite the filth of the streets, the trash sacks still uncollected, the piles of litter, the many homeless people begging and schizophrenically muttering to themselves and the poor who try to sell you unwanted candy, the insurmontable heat and the presence of police cars with men armed with rifles inside them patroling every now and them, this neighborhood is weirdly peaceful. As if all of these elements fell into place into a perfect jigsaw. Maybe it was the sleep deprival but I could see the homeless, the litter, the cracked concrete of the sidewalk and the pot-hole filled asphalt of the road, the police and the chatter, and the messy traffick all falling into place into a perfect image of what a seamlessly moving and breathing society is.

It has always been like this, and there are no elements of chaos causing disorder among those people, they are merely living their lives, everything functioning like a well-oiled machine, as good as it gets. Any fundamental structural problems can only be solved by higher, external forces, such as the medium that needs to be fixed by a creator so that the art piece's beauty can be better expressed. We are just the characters and we have more things to worry about. This painting however, is crooked, and it would be much appreciated if it could be aligned better. I could be the one, my political theory mega essays of schizo-rambling are going to change the world, and I will always be remembered as a genius, I can't wait.

But for now, I'm gonna eat some fried fish with fries, drink some soda and can't some sleep.

Stay gold Rio de Janeiro.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:13:07 2021 No.17709860
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>>17708528
>girl I really like
>have never made a move cause I'm a wuss and she's a customer at my job so kinda scared of any complications with my position
>shefuckingknows.webm Has known for a long time. She can see it in my behavior probably, and I can see clearly that she knows
>has at least been kind and smiling to me
>she is generally forced to bump into me a lot since we live in a small town and also lives in the next block
>we usually just exchange a furtive 'hi' 'hello' etc
>be last night
>walk past her in the street again
>say hello to her
>says a bored 'hi' as if forced by Divine Law to do so, while ROLLING her fucking eyes
Anons, I've been through two tough break-ups and have also been rejected in the past, but that eye-roll was so dismissive I felt less than the most worthless worm crawling the dirt
Why do women have to be so cruel? I also can't quite figure out why she did this to me. I've barely even bothered her or talked about muh feelings

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:21:57 2021 No.17709899 >>17708528 Anime is more /lit/ than ever before.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:24:57 2021 No.17709910 >>17709860 Bitch, this post just killed my vibe

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:32:30 2021 No.17709933 >>17709910 fuck you for not being bullet proof

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:40:05 2021 No.17709960 >>17709860 >>17709910 >>17709933 Why do you cunts always go for the vapid ones?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:40:43 2021 No.17709962 >>17709818 I feel you. I read my diary entries from 7 years ago and felt like it could be written last night. I didnt grow up at all.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:41:41 2021 No.17709967

>>17709860
A. She isn't interested and doesn't want to lead you on
Ab. She isn't interested and her patience with pretending to be nice wore out
B. She's butthurt that you didn't ask her out (it made her think less of herself)
C. She thinks you're a pussy since you didn't ask her out

>Why do women have to be so cruel?
She might not have been trying to hurt you. But if she was being cruel it's because it's basically a woman's job. It sucks, and doesn't always work out for the best, but it's their job to weed out the weak.
This system is imperfect, but it's the best nature's got, and nature is using fallible humans as her emissary, so don't expect perfect results, patience, or perfect understanding. While it can seem like that rejection means you're nothing, in reality you probably just fucked up a few things and can learn. You're also never going to be attractive to everyone. No one is, and if you are, God fucking help you because that's a whole other can of worms.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:48:49 2021 No.17709991 >>17709860 Jesus fucking christ my man. Any books for this feel?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:51:44 2021 No.17710002

>>17709860
This is a good opportunity for you to learn an important element of manhood: not giving a shit about any individual woman, since your chances with any individual woman are low. Flirtation and spontaneous chemistry with a girl can be nice, but they don't necessarily mean anything more than that. You can enjoy the gay little game of cat and mouse between the two of you as much as you want, sometimes unrequited flirting and idle fantasies of the cute girl you bump into every day at the library are fun to entertain in a kind of blue balls of the soul way, but fundamentally you have two options: either ask her out or don't.

There is no in between option. If you're going to ask her out, the sooner the better. If you aren't going to, then be as wistful as you like, but sever all hopes of ever fucking her so you aren't deluding yourself. The point of making it a binary choice is that if you ask her out, you will either get a yes or be rejected, and in either case you will know immediately whether you should invest more time and energy in the connection between the two of you. If you don't plan to ask her out, you know the answer to whether you should invest time and energy. It's no.

You'll notice there is no "spend six months fantasizing about a life together or strategizing how to get more on her radar" option, and no "agonize over the meaning of her minor facial gestures and try to plot her mood swings and shifts in attitude toward me" option. There is no in between. If you feel anything about her other than that she's a random person you sometimes see, then you should ask her out immediately. Shit or get off the pot. If you shit and she doesn't shit back, erase her from your mind and set your sights on someone else.

As you get older you will learn all this anyway because women will become boring to you. After you date a few of these girls you'll realize the payoff isn't worth the wistful fantasizing, and you are debasing yourself to chase after someone who probably has the emotional maturity and inner life complexity of a teenager. If you learn this wisdom now, without having to get these hard knocks first to acquire it in hindsight, you'll save yourself a lot of trouble. The only attitudes you should have toward a woman, aside from "I am already dating/married to this lady," are #1 "This is a random person, effectively male to me," #2 "I am going to ask her out ASAP," and "I asked her out and she said no; go back to #1." There is no #3 "Oh gosh oh gee oh gosh guys she winked instead of blinked at me guys what does it mean." It means nothing. She has probably let a bunch of guys fuck her for a lark while you're thinking about what her eye movements mean.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:58:54 2021 No.17710024

>>17709967
>it's their job to weed out the weak.

Extremely retarded "edgy"cope for sexually frustrated cucks who can't understand that a hot girl doesn't wanna fuck them. Humanity is naturally and instinctively "eugenic", but fact of the matter is that there are women who are not complete hotties in the world, who will have to content themselves with "genetically lesser" men, and there are men who will have to content themselves with genetically lesser women. These people are not going anywhere because they are breeding with each other.

The real straight-forward reason for your little anguishes is simple: SHE'S JUST NOT INTO YOU

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 03:59:37 2021 No.17710027

what's great about having a breakdown (if you have someone to help you get back up) is that you learn just what works for you. so when you get back up you're gonna be your own flavor of eccentric, and while all the normies barely scrape by with their copes, you're gonna be an advanced lifeform that knows that it is fully adequate to shitpost and watch old cartoons

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:01:06 2021 No.17710031 >>17710024 Why are you insulting me while agreeing with me?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:02:30 2021 No.17710037 The Room series by Fireproof studios is just perfect. Going through The Room 4 now and I'm reminded of my love for gaming, and that there is more to games than just press sequence of buttons for your character to do cool thing.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:02:50 2021 No.17710038

>>17710031
Either a roastie or a redditor who only uses 4chan to skim over posts for excuses to say INCEL INCEL YOU'RE ALL INCELS. Just ignore it, it can only bear to be on 4chan for short periods and will leave if it doesn't get into an argument where it can scream incel over and over.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:04:56 2021 No.17710041 >>17710031 A man can only take so much of the same retarded arguments and dilettante attempts at sociology from the geniuses of this site

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:06:37 2021 No.17710049

>>17710038
Bet a bullet through the skull I've been here longer than you, but apparently anybody who's not an overthinking princess trying to cope with being a complete utter failure with "muh extremely shallow understanding of evolutionary psych" is a redditor

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:08:50 2021 No.17710061 >>17710041 You're not a man. You're garbage.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:08:58 2021 No.17710063 >>17709423 I won't do this though I recognize I could and should. I don't like my parents, they are sad people, I won't get in the way the grey days that will be all of their days until the last.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:09:38 2021 No.17710066 File: 69 KB, 588x360, holy shit this guy's mad.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17710061

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:09:43 2021 No.17710068 >>17710041 What?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:11:29 2021 No.17710074

>>17709967
>>17710002
Maybe I should add two important points I omitted from my initial post, and I did so because I wanted to get straight answers like these without complicating the matter.
a) I'm 26 and judging by her voice/posture/neck lines she's late 30's at best, 42 at worse
b) She got married back in October
Don't know how these would relate to my troubles in general.
At least with replies like yours I now know I should just move the fuck on. I went through great pains with this shit, I would force my then-girlfriend to take the long route for my house so as to not pass in front of her house and see me with another girl, and some other ridiculous stuff I did out of paranoia.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:14:41 2021 No.17710090 >>17710074 >I would force my then-girlfriend to take the long route for my house so as to not pass in front of her house and see me with another girl Yeah, it seems like you have bigger fish to fry than some girl.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:14:49 2021 No.17710091 File: 6 KB, 237x213, moe.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17710074

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:16:14 2021 No.17710096 >>17710074 You’re stalking her man

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:16:39 2021 No.17710098 your mother's ass

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:17:46 2021 No.17710104 >>17710074 That merits more than an eye roll, anon

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:22:32 2021 No.17710117 >>17710074 Get on with your life you schizo. Just call your ex-gf if you're feeling lonely or find another one You my guy are absolutely OBSESSED

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 04:38:07 2021 No.17710177 >>17709860 You had your chance. Now she thinks that you led her up.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:02:36 2021 No.17710252

>>17709423
>>17709443
My mother sexualy abused me at least once when I was around 6, and I have the suspicion when I was 11 as well. She was either neglectful and drinking or sober actively sadistic. At this point forgiveness for me relative to her is not seeking some form of vengeance. I would go further if she just didnt keep on trying to do the same shit to me as an adult.
This is not to discount what you say, of course. I am sure the vast majority of mothers deserve from thier children. I have always wondered what having a loving mother was like.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:05:29 2021 No.17710261 File: 125 KB, 1289x1320, 2lvdaz.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] Kpop needs a containment board

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:07:52 2021 No.17710268 >>17710252 Please pardon my ESLisms, it is late in the night for me.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:10:37 2021 No.17710278 File: 72 KB, 540x545, 1610765095487.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] by all accounts I am a disgusting human being, there's no way out

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:17:09 2021 No.17710311 It's too tiring.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:19:10 2021 No.17710322

>>17710252
That's horrible anon. I'm glad you're strong enough to face it directly and overcome it. You should pass your strength onto others so we can move toward a world where nobody is as sick as your mom was. I think being that kind of person is like a kind of prison, I don't know. Even if fucked up people seem happy I don't think true happiness is possible that way.

Here's to you having a big happy family and all your kids having big happy families because of how good and abuse free their childhood with you was.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:22:55 2021 No.17710340 >>17709960 Why does my hand get wet when I touch water?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:27:35 2021 No.17710354

>>17710322
Thank you, anon, your words make my heart warm. Here is to hoping I can overcome how the experience has warped me, as a big happy family is exactly what I want.
>>17710311
But, if we are to find anything beautiful and worthwhile we must persist. I feel you all the same, though.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:30:13 2021 No.17710365

There is hardly anything which make mes confident to say that we live in the greatest times of human history. If anything, we live in the most isolating times to have ever existed. Neo-enlightenists are the scum of the Earth. Fuck everything about this gay ass postmodernist vision of goodness. Y’all are a bunch of dweebs who’ve never once been put in position where you see things as an estranged member of muh simulacra of society.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:34:14 2021 No.17710396 >>17710365 preach it brother

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:35:19 2021 No.17710403 >>17709960 non vapid ones are taken since hs or get married early.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:38:39 2021 No.17710421

I feel cursed by God. Everyone tells me I’m good looking yet I always get rejected. All my average looking friends have romantic partners and a sexual history while I don’t. Lately people have been theorizing that I’m autistic. My mom even said to my sister she thinks I’m autistic. That would make sense. I’m confident if I were to test myself I would be on the spectrum though probably not too far on it. Women have had interest in me but I haven’t been able to sustain that interest. One time this girl wanted to have sex with me and we were in the bed and all and did some things but no penetration. I didn’t feel comfortable. I barely knew this person. I would much rather have taken her on some dates beforehand and gotten to know her but most women aren’t interested in courtship these days. I feel like eventually I’ll run across someone with the same mindset as me. There have to be women out there like that but so far none I’ve met have been. I figure the main source of my problems is I discovered 4chan the summer before my sophomore year of high school so the internet is what shaped those formative years moreso than irl interaction. I had no real friends then and in these past few years post high school I’ve worked to change that with some success so I’m proud of myself for that.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:38:40 2021 No.17710420 >>17710354 I'm afraid there is no choice but to persist since Allah has made the other alternative forbidden. You're right though, even in the most bleakest situations we can find things to appreciate that keep us going.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:44:41 2021 No.17710455

>>17710365
There is hardly anything which make mes confident to say that we live in the greatest times of human history. If anything, we live in the most isolating times to have ever existed. Neo-enlightenists are the scum of the Earth. Fuck everything about this gay ass postmodernist vision of goodness. Y’all are a bunch of dweebs who’ve never once been put in position where you see things as an estranged member of muh simulacra of society.

But what does it matter if you/we aren't living in the "greatest time of human history"? Does that devalue anything? Was or will only be what you consider to be the "greatest time of human history" be worth living in? Does that mean that most of human history is bullshit? Because if that is so, how can you legitimate that YOU specifically should not be living in those general times, but in some "greatest time of human history"? Why should you?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:50:39 2021 No.17710484

>>17709967
>She thinks you're a pussy since you didn't ask her out
It took me awhile to realize this general rule and it’s kind of a brutal one. It’s always better to just ask her out and get rejected, then you don’t have to spend months agonizing on what might have been. That’s an awful feeling and you don’t have to do it.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 05:52:20 2021 No.17710490

>>17710455
It’s a mystery that the one race has not entirely beached itself on the carcass of a once great species. We have truly degenerated from esteemed values which set apart the man of yesterday from the native savage he fought so hardly to subdue. Now, we mockingly laugh at what they we necessitated in acting upon in order that you might get this chance to flaunt a lack of instinct for greater survival. Even more so, no one is undertaking the efforts to either remedy the festering social disease spread by the queers and women, nor is their an acknowledgment that what we now consider the cutting edge of culture is a cruel bastardization of what was once the pinnacle achievement of natural evolution.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 06:04:49 2021 No.17710548 >>17709832 No, it’s actually pathetic.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 06:07:08 2021 No.17710565 Elizabethan literature is tragically under read. It’s the best the English language has produced. Too strong of a pleb filter I guess

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 06:18:08 2021 No.17710620 I just got the criticism that I'm so boring I talk like an AI. Even if he was just trying to fuck with me, I have no idea how to rebuttal that. That hurts

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 06:39:13 2021 No.17710739 Why did I stay up until 6am I sure am retard

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 06:48:33 2021 No.17710792

>>17710620
Normies suck, anon. Work on separating yourself emotionally from expectations of social norms. If you talk in a way that someone else has a problem with, that doesn't mean it's some kind of cosmic failure speaking to a universal truth. You actually harm nobody by something as superfluous as the way you talk. There's no "rebuttal" to that because that's just him being a dick. No matter what you do, you can never refute the idea that people are assholes sometimes because they are. It reflects more on him than it does you.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 06:48:56 2021 No.17710795

>>17709753
Nah, they're only upset by the pics moving the conversation. You can see it in the replacement pics. They're a genre of posters who really want (You)s and adulation, and the fact that any (You)s and adulation a specimen they disapprove of gets are equivalent to any they get sickens them. They want to believe they are some part of an elite who are getting deserving praise for their choices, and the fetish guy is an obvious confrontation to that fantasy. It's such an obvious confrontation they have to break basic site rules of courtesy to post what is essentially an off topic /adv/ thread to scoop the guy they wish they weren't exactly like.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 07:00:40 2021 No.17710861 >>17710620 Rebutt with "I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't let you diss me like that"

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 07:05:59 2021 No.17710891 >>17710861 Fuck, what's the black Holly episode called again man? I just realized that would make my Saturday

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 07:17:06 2021 No.17710937 >>17710490 I could try to argue with you, but it seems like you a just willingly living a truly awful life >the festering social disease spread by the queers and women And you probably deserve it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 07:29:06 2021 No.17710989 I tried doing cbt exercises when you write down a negative thought and try to write a bit positive counter one. However even after writing down a more positive one and rationally understanding the meaning, i still feel like crap.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 07:33:50 2021 No.17711016 >>17710989 >I tried doing cock and ball torture exercises

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 07:39:41 2021 No.17711047

>>17710989
You're not supposed to write a more positive one, you're supposed to be judging it for accuracy. An overly negative thought is precisely as far from reality as an overly positive one. It is the mechanism by which we form inaccurate thoughts of either quality, be it positive or negative, which CBT is attempting to address. The individual beliefs become almost immaterial, because it's the system of mental hygiene that you're developing via those exercises which is important rather than just changing one belief to another.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 07:51:05 2021 No.17711105

>>17708528
It hurts. I put up a brave face, said what I should have, and dropped her entirely with no subsequent contact. Yet despite doing what was right, I now struggle over the many vindictive things I could have said for my own satisfaction. Things I could have said to draw out that illusion of love just a bit longer. Things I could have said to hurt her, to make her suffer in the way I feel I am now.

But despite all of these feelings, I stop myself. I become my own boundary, I block my desperation with my principle.

And though that may be right...
It still hurts.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 08:07:52 2021 No.17711179 I'm thinking of writing a semi-autobiographical novel

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 08:15:06 2021 No.17711207 Now that its been memed on here I can't see it any other way. Was Harry Potter really written by Mi6 to encourage mass immigration?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 08:42:27 2021 No.17711341

>>17711047
I'll give one example. I have this "i'll never feel love because im 28 kv and that train passed by” thought and i write a bit positive one "not everything is lost as there are people who find their first love being older than me and even i wouldnt be able to do so, it doesnt automatically make me a bad person" but i still feel sad after it.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 08:52:45 2021 No.17711387

>>17711341
Yes, but it actually makes sense to feel badly about it, doesn't it? What you are experiencing is a gap between what you have and what you want. We are not wired to feel good about not getting what we wait. The important part is to allow yourself some space for the feeling. Cope is a meme word, so take me in the more conventional sense when I say that developing strong coping skills is pivotal. In identifying things you feel poorly about with good justification (as identified above) you are going to sometimes have strong emotions which accompany them. If your workbook has a section on this, I'd recommend really taking your time with it. It's more than I can really cover here. If you have specific questions I'd be happy to answer to the best of my ability.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 08:52:52 2021 No.17711388 >>17709391 hello daddy

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 08:58:40 2021 No.17711416 >>17711387 Im reading Feeling Good by Burns. I have a question regarding cope - is everything just a cope? Fox and grapes is probably the most well known cope. Even my cbt work is a cope regarding my inability to function like normal people.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:08:59 2021 No.17711460

>>17711416
Discard the meme version of cope entirely. The 4chan version is not helpful in any way and has no philosophical or scientific backing to it. Given that it's not helpful and additionally has no rigour to it, there's absolutely no point in seeing it in a scientific context and hearing the meme.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:11:58 2021 No.17711471 penis inna mouth feel good monkey go ooh ahh

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:16:18 2021 No.17711505 Jannies delete effortposts referencing multiple books but leave up threads about politics. Shit board.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:31:09 2021 No.17711593 >>17711460 I understand. I try to cope but it still doesnt help me with emotional state.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:31:42 2021 No.17711596 >>17711105 Time, anon. It heals.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:32:45 2021 No.17711602 >>17711207 No

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:42:05 2021 No.17711655 I wish there was a fuck off to pol/r9k button on this website that causes range IP ban for the poster if pressed by a set number of different ips.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:47:14 2021 No.17711697

The goal is never going to be to just stop feeling bad. If you're alive you will at some point feel bad. Our emotions are the essence of our humanity. Crack that section on coping skills open and really study the shit out of it. This is the part that's hard to nail down without a therapist.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:47:31 2021 No.17711700 I'm thinking of banging a hooker

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:48:05 2021 No.17711705 >>17711697 was for >>17711593

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 09:58:03 2021 No.17711757 >>17711700 Use a condom

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:00:04 2021 No.17711766 I think I fucked up. Was texting with this girl who seemed well-read and intelligent. Started writing to her about philosophy and now she's ignoring me. She probably thinks I have autism. Oh well.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:21:25 2021 No.17711893 >>17711700 you should, it's great

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:24:47 2021 No.17711921

>>17711766
Women don't really want to discuss philosophy while texting with a guy, and those that do would most likely reveal themselves as knowing nothing about it and just want to be angry about something.
Texting should be small talk and if you really want to talk books, stick to fiction. She'll probably be very happy to have someone to discuss the plot and motivation of characters in her favorite book. No judging, there is no right taste, just different ones.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:31:00 2021 No.17711954 >>17711921 Yeah it does seem that way. I don't really care about discussing philosophy with women though. I have /lit/ and other friends for that. I'll try to salvage it but I think it might be too late.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:31:28 2021 No.17711958 >>17710252 kill her

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:35:36 2021 No.17711978

I was going to join the military and take a crack at becoming a green beret but my brother already did so and he absolutely hates it for extremely relevant reasons. Now I feel like something idealized died without a whimper. I’m greatly disappointed. Now I’m studying for the LSAT and really don’t have a clue if that doesn’t work out. Or if it does work out if that’s even a viable option given what I’m looking to get out of life.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:36:54 2021 No.17711989

>>17711766
Well, I dont know you obviously, and am male myself, but most guys talking about philosophy are profoundly unattractive in doing so. They're too arrogant, too spergy, and generally too up their ass about it. I would keep any philo discussion to light and ironic jokes unless you get asked a serious question about your opinions. Which probably wont happen unless someone genuinely likes and respects you or you achieve big objective success in life.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:36:59 2021 No.17711990 I write multiple posts per thread. I have a lot of my mind.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:37:40 2021 No.17711992 >>17711978 to tack something else onto my comment - the warrior class if entirely dead (if it existed at all). Today’s green berets are brain dead morons that only talk about wanting to go kill terries.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:39:36 2021 No.17712000 >>17711766 What did you say? I know when people text me retarded shit about something I've read I'll mostly ignore it. Had she claimed to have read the book you brought up?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:39:39 2021 No.17712002 >>17711992 Green berets are CIA stooges who illegally do subversive shit for bad reasons in sovereign countries. I'm glad you're not becoming one, do something decent with your life instead.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:42:47 2021 No.17712019 >>17711978 There's always the Foreign Legion. You could get stabbed by a Moroccan in Southern France for high pay.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:46:38 2021 No.17712041 File: 93 KB, 1023x681, hrabal.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] I love this nigga like you wouldn't believe, bros

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 10:52:59 2021 No.17712075 >>17711989 I don't think it was arrogant, but it is spergy. I'll keep that in mind. >>17712000 It wasn't about a particular book, but I made an argument for something I'd said earlier.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:00:43 2021 No.17712118

>>17712075
>I made an argument for something I'd said earlier.
>Vagueness
tbph m8 this is the kind of conversation I would drop. Anon might be right about the arrogant thing because what you're describing here sounds like
>So then I told her why I was right, again, but philosophical-like
Did she seem super interested in what you were making the argument for the first time? You're trying to get us to work out nuance within the vaguest context ever, so there's a chance you sperged out slightly once, and then doubled down on the sperging because you didn't detect she tried to steer away from spergland the first time.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:04:05 2021 No.17712140 >>17712118 I don't want to give more context because by her taste I genuinely suspect she might browse /lit/. But what you said about "doubling down by not detecting" seems to be the case.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:11:57 2021 No.17712193

>>17712140
Yeah, it's nice to have someone who will listen to your sperg moments, but it's important to let them have a sperg moment too before your next one, and realize the difference between them being kind and tolerant or them being interested in finding out more. If someone is trying to steer the conversation their way, it comes across as selfishness or arrogance or autism.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:17:22 2021 No.17712234 >>17712193 True words. Most of my life is spent on philosophy so these things are new to me. Since she seemed very nice, I'll try to write about one of her favorite books (in a non-spergy way) to capture her attention again.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:19:13 2021 No.17712245

>>17712002
Yea but I think the extremely murky stuff is done by the CIA special activities center. However I agree with you on many levels. However, the mission statement of the green berets and their objectives don’t necessitate evil. Essentially they go in there and act as force multipliers to stage a local uprising against evil regimes. Where we get into trouble is what do we do after that. I don’t have any ethical qualms with covertly imbedding SF guys into target countries and using like 12 of them to essentially overthrow a hostile government. Take Venezuela for instance. I would support the act of staging a local overthrow of Maduro if that alone would restore Venezuela...but it wouldn’t so

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:20:18 2021 No.17712254 >>17712019 My 1st cousin once removed is foreign legion. I won’t actually do that but it’s not a bad thought. I don’t know much about it other than they sometimes let the convicts join

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:23:18 2021 No.17712273

>>17712234
>to capture her attention again.
Anon, you should be listening to each other's sperg outs because you like hearing about their autistic joy. Doing it to have a captive audience for you to sperg out again is not what I meant, if you are interpreting it that way. Or even if anyone else read it that way.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:24:47 2021 No.17712280 >>17712254 Some placements are basically a death sentence, but it is well paid and they erase your former identity and give you a new French one and teach you French, so it's appealling to people who figure their life is over anyway.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:25:21 2021 No.17712284
File: 176 KB, 1022x688, 1551178180430.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>17708528
I have gotten fat. Not America-tier fat, but lockdown has given me some extra kg. My friends calls me fat, but I think im pretty sure its banter and to encourage me getting fit again. What they dont know is that it is really impacting my psyche and I am not happy with my body anymore. I dont feel like I have the right to eat and if I eat, I should eat less.

But I am improving. Im not eating junkfood, candy nor drinking cola anymore like I used to. I have began running about 3-4 times a week. The trail I run on is about 3 to 4 Km and I start at my house and finish at my house. I am also looking into bodyweight training and getting stronger. From tomorrow and every following Sunday, I will measure my weight to see if I am doing any progess.

The more I write, the more I realise this feels like a "life is miserable and I require empathy" post. Honestly I just needed to vent a little since this has been bothering me for some time now. Thanks for making this Thread op. I really needed to vent.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:26:27 2021 No.17712289 >>17712273 I realize that anon. I won't sperg out again. But since she left me on read, I don't know a better way to generate discussion other than mentioning a book she mentioned. Do you have a better way in mind?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:39:42 2021 No.17712369

>>17712289
You could ask her about her day. A book she mentioned could be okay, but it could come across as manipulation. Girls are better at social nuance so she'll see it's you wanting to get her attention whatever you write.
Instead of trying to fix where you led the conversation, try a new conversation. It's not a choose your own adventure book where, because you got the wrong ending, you can now go back to page 47 and choose the other option. Bringing up a book you had no interest in then, and are only interested in now that she isn't paying attention, isn't a good plan. You'll spend the relationship trying to manage who gets the spotlight instead of being genuinely interested.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:45:19 2021 No.17712405

>>17712369
I am genuinely interested in the book though, so it's not just manipulation. I would hope she doesn't see it that way, but if she does, I don't really care. You must understand I am probably a bit autistic and you're making this too complicated for me.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:48:21 2021 No.17712424 >>17708528 I wish I could stop watching porn. It's so delicious in the moment but after you cum you hate yourself.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 11:50:11 2021 No.17712432

>>17712405
>I am genuinely interested in the book though, so it's not just manipulation
Everything social involves some manipulation. If you're really interested in the book then try it. It's a much lower level of manipulation than if you weren't interested, and not all manipulation is bad. If you weren't interested, it would be really bad and stupid manipulation.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 12:37:22 2021 No.17712745 File: 377 KB, 1149x560, 1580502831205.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] hate that I love women so much, wish I could just see them as dudes

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 12:44:38 2021 No.17712803
File: 350 KB, 234x752, 2E8SAv3.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

For some time now, the most stupid thoughts have been rising into my consciousness with a force against which I can no longer defend myself. Just now I bumped into someone in the kitchen and we talked a bit about the distribution of upcoming tasks. While we were talking like this, a thought came to my mind: I've never noticed it before, but when I'm standing in a room with another person, the room belongs to the other person and I'm just a sort of guest. The world around me is like a board game in which - whether consciously or unconsciously - everyone tries to occupy the free spaces with their colored stones. The next moment I felt like a solipsist and said to myself: enough playing, I am the king, everything is mine! I threw all the stones off the board, so to speak, and laughed at my opponents. My mind exploded out of my skull and dipped the kitchen in my victory colors. Is that self-confidence, when you perceive everything that exists only as a guest of your own world? When you presume and entitle yourself to be the sole owner of everything?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:03:15 2021 No.17712948

I failed again. I don't cope well with failures and I don't like to share them. Hearing encouragement and supporting words from other makes me feel small. Like they were mocking me for failing. The worst people being the ones that are genuinely disappointed in me. What do they expect me to say? "What do you want?" "What can I do?" "I failed. I'll try again next time, stop looking at me like that and fuck you."?

I want to run away.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:05:56 2021 No.17712973

Those who are not software developers cannot fathom how despised it is among them. Basically to develop software used on any of their quadrillion dollar iphone market or operating systems you have to own their software and use their IDEs. Not only is this a sly way to maximize even more profits , but it forces your hands and limits your choices. Like anything without competition, these softwares are invariably underperforming and give mediocre experience.
They do the same thing with their heavy handed hardware choices, devising their own standards for peripherals so that you have to buy more of their gadgets. They take advantage of their cornered market.
It is a violation of the hacker ethos that everything should be designed to maximize possibilities and options, hence free and open source software, etc.
If only the government wasn't in these corporations pockets these monopolies would be seen for what they are summarily trust busted.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:06:57 2021 No.17712988 >>17712973 >fathom how despised it is among them How despised Apple is I meant. I couldn't even bear to name it in my post.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:15:02 2021 No.17713038 File: 34 KB, 480x477, 1613423724927.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >tfw remember I live in the timeline where the Pheonix Wright series turned to weird occultism already on the second entry

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:18:08 2021 No.17713055 Do you think being a Merchant Mariner is a good job as a writer? I have a kind of romantic notion of it and find it appealing.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:24:20 2021 No.17713101

>>17713055
Those adventurous professions like being a sailing merchant, a soldier, a biologist researcher and so on are much more sanitized than they used to be back in the old days, from which we take the idea of them being fields that through an innocent attempt at utility end up opening paths to opportunities to engage in exciting adventures and tales. Granted, you're going to live much more in the way of interesting stories to tell than the average person as a Merchant Mariner, but ultimately the measure of whether your profession can instigate material for writing, and its abundance and quality, pertain entirely to your own capacity as a writer and your own level of introspection and ability to extract meaning from what surrounds you.

I'd say go for it.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:25:05 2021 No.17713104

>>17712284
I’m fat, like American fat. I’m 109 kg at 183 cm. I eat, especially junk food, when I’m bored, stressed, anxious, depressed, which is all the time. I work from home now and my setup is in my kitchen. I’m also a loner with no friends, no girlfriend. I struggle with willpower when this is basically all I have.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:26:39 2021 No.17713114 >>17712002 90% of the time they just train foreign military and police. My brother spent 6 years in an SF group.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:27:48 2021 No.17713125 >>17711978 Why does he hate it? My brother was also a GB and I know people who hate it exist but I’ve never met them. Mine didn’t hate it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:31:47 2021 No.17713156 >>17709539 I worked a bar like that in college so I get it but unfortunately it did in fact make me a racist among other things.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:43:55 2021 No.17713242 >>17708528 behead all satans

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:44:52 2021 No.17713249

I am actually envious of people who get to live traditional (and safe) lives in third world places like Afghanistan, Tajikistan, Kyrgyzstan, Tibet, etc. I wish I could just drop out, move there, and join them. I will get chastised for saying this because “oh well you have so much comfort”. Yeah, I know. Still, this shit is just not working for me. I might kms soon. I don’t know. I consider it seriously a lot now.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:49:16 2021 No.17713284 >>17713249 well you're not alone, I can tell you that much

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:49:43 2021 No.17713285

>>17712973
The problem is that companies like Apple are embedded in the trend of reducing choice for the benefit of reducing the required cognitive load on the user. Ideally you'd want to balance these aspects by creating simple applications that can be explored as far as the user wants but since most people would never seek this landscape of choice the companies don't bother. I worry about the consequences of a design ethos that continually reduces the amount of clicks used but it seems irreversible because it's so closely aligned with the entire history of automation.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 13:54:43 2021 No.17713315

>>17713249
Just go away, anon. Meet new people, try something. Don't kill yourself.
And if you're still in uni, graduate first.
I'm the same as you. I have a few years of work left, but once I'm over with everything I'll just depart for another country.
I want a simple, safe, life. Somewhere wild, somewhere I won't have to go through the inane shit the city people make me go through all the time.
Cut all ties, start anew.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 14:05:15 2021 No.17713433

>>17713315
I’m 27. I’ll be 28 soon. I’m a college graduate and I’ve been working for a few years now. I hate it needless to say. I watched a documentary recently about missing Japanese citizens, people who just disappear. For some it’s totally unknown what happened to them. For others, it’s known that they just cut ties and disappeared. I would say my 3 strongest fantasies at this point are suicide, doing something like that, or disappearing into the Hindu Kush or Tibetan plateau or something. One of these, I’m sure you can tell, is particularly fantastical. One is particularly realistic.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 14:07:55 2021 No.17713463 >>17712745 what makes you hate them?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 14:18:53 2021 No.17713567 >>17712745 for me, it's the opposite - i'm attracted to women but i dont really find them interesting.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 14:28:58 2021 No.17713647

>>17713433
>my 3 strongest fantasies
not that guy, but mine is dying in a rendom heroic act, protecting someone or something.. if someone got attacked while I was passing by and I would just go to fight the person and bleed out or something.
good way to go I thing. glorified suicide in a way

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 14:31:19 2021 No.17713661 Randy Lenz is an utterly despicable character but I think DFW's intention was to make you want to kill him and go "There", reflecting it back at you.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 15:07:49 2021 No.17713982 >>17713463 I don't, I love them.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 15:40:25 2021 No.17714249

for what unforsaken reason do I always regress whenever I accomplish something, whenever I use up all of my strenght, mental and physical, to accomplish something absolutely mundane for others, everything else crumbles, I'm incapable of accomplishing ANYTHING without ruining everything else, I just can't, nothing I ever do I can build upon, whenever I manage a feat immediatelly everything I ignored in order to accomplish said feat crumbles, and I'm not starting from zero, I'm starting from -1 as the other things were probably more important, not to mention my mind is constantly against me in such ways I can't manage, I don't see an escape in anything else than getting some brain number wage slavey cuckey yummy pills prescribed, to forget who I am and just get consumed by the capitalist skinner box, I can't keep a job, I can't stay in uni, the only reason I graduated high school was because all my teachers saw that I'm a useless piece of shit and they KNEW I would kill myself had they failed me; my escape used to be books, sports and videogames, now I can't read more than 10 pages of a book and I can't play league or starcraft without trembling like a fucking dog from the dread of how these activites are dead end and I can't get back into sports after grinding paratrooper physique and then being denied entrance to army because of a recruiter mishap, and along all of this I know i don't have it as bad as other people, I'm middle class after all

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 15:40:35 2021 No.17714250 >>17713647 Yeah. That’s better than all 4. That one almost felt too absurd to be a fantasy for me.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 15:48:31 2021 No.17714303

>>17712745
pretty and young girls are great, yeah, they look nice, smell nice, they give you emotional care and stuff that a man can't, but man, I have never met a woman that had a goal in her mind that wasn't implanted by somebody else, or a rational or original thought, you really ought to consider girls to be caregivers, not free thinkers, and when you accept that, accept that we are different, you will finally be free

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 15:49:15 2021 No.17714309 My Dad keeps trying to come to my apartment. I don’t want him to come and he simply will take the message.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 15:51:44 2021 No.17714333 >>17714303 sorry, not an incel

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 15:52:06 2021 No.17714335 Why do poets always have to write about such cringe subjects? I’m gonna become a poet who exclusively writes about how comfy my day was. >ode on my morning coffee >leaves of grass growing in my yard >rime of the ancient comforter

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 15:59:36 2021 No.17714399 >>17714249 shit happens. carry on.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 16:08:35 2021 No.17714460 >>17714335 Politics, mostly.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 16:23:49 2021 No.17714587 >>17713982 what makes you hate loving them?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 16:30:04 2021 No.17714632

>>17714587
Not that anon, but I find myself perturbed by a sole attraction to women, and an inability to fuck a man, because 90% of them are inherently deeply social and subtext driven creatures who read into and require discourse which my life has made me largely bewildered by and unable to engage with.
I am an autistic, socially reclusive and therefor inept, or at least mediocre, man, though not an incel, and oftentimes question how much easier it'd be if I was capable of being gay and had no attraction or love for women.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 16:30:47 2021 No.17714635 >>17708653 This will go great on the refrigerator, anonito

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 16:35:43 2021 No.17714674

>>17714632
I feel the same. I absolutely hate that I love women. It's literally just a drug addiction you can't get rid of. It's like I was born with a fucking morphine addiction. Even if I resist it, I'll always feel it stalking me. Everything in life will always be held up in comparison to giving in to morphine again.

I try to be a good man. I don't hate women, I sort of despise them and they disgust me, but I don't have irrational hatred of them. I have plenty of success with them. I'm dating right now. But I really don't care about women at all. I wish I didn't "have" to date, I wish I didn't feel driven to care about them or their bodies.

I feel dirty even when I'm successful with women, I feel like I've let myself down. All that I am, all that I want to be, is starkly compared in that moment of "success" with the fleshy blob in front of me, and the animal drive within me. It feels like the animal won the contest for my soul, like it's laughing at me and gloating that it was right, I'm not really a soul, I don't really have aspirations to be something better, I'm a fucking monkey that would trade in all its values and goals for some pussy and jiggling fat. It's like the morphine stalking me and laughing at me that all the joy I'll ever feel is a ghost or shadow of the joy I could feel by shooting up and passing out on a dirty couch. I hate women except as mothers. I hate sex.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 16:48:10 2021 No.17714764 >>17709488 Be strong

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 16:55:23 2021 No.17714826 File: 2.49 MB, 1920x1080, 3544CA20-519C-45F4-983F-FC9F3BE2FBD4.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17709488 Sorry, anon. It’s not your or your dad’s fault.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 16:58:34 2021 No.17714861 I never know what to do with my weekends. I have no girlfriend, no friends, no hobbies.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:04:14 2021 No.17714909 >>17714861 Well, you have direct and immediate control over one of those things

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:07:02 2021 No.17714924 >>17714861 >no hobbies >posts on /lit/ it checks out

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:32:19 2021 No.17715096 >>17714909 I’m not really interested in anything. If I have free time I spend it reading or writing. I usually hunt during hunting season but I’m not really interested in that anymore.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:42:06 2021 No.17715160 >>17715096 Reading and writing are hobbies, friend. Focus on improving your skills of both. Tbh you sound like you're depressed so you think things are meaningless and that you have no identity but it's right there in front of you

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:43:10 2021 No.17715170

>>17708528
I am realizing that I'm an actual bad person. I am still struggling with that realization. I say things which I am convinced I mean, only to then turn around and do the exact opposite without any sense of wrongness at all. And I am puzzled when someone calls me out. I couldn't explain myself even if I wanted and I get frustrated at people if they call me out.

I don't think I evolved past the egocentric phase.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:45:09 2021 No.17715182 >>17715170 Same. It takes a lot of work to change that but if you can admit it, you've got a chance.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:48:10 2021 No.17715213 I miss camping. As soon as I can I'm packing some whiskey, ramen, sausages, bacon and other varieties of comfort food, as well as books to sit by the fire with melting into a warm cocoon for 2 weeks.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:54:15 2021 No.17715265

>>17715182
Funny, I'm bordering the exact opposite conclusion. Every attempt at being nice has only made it more obvious that I am not. And you cannot force yourself into something you're not.

Case in point - I've always dreamed (and still do) of a perfect soulmate, and yet every single time my desire for anyone turns out to be as shallow as can be. It's like my inside and outside are from incompatible worlds. That's also why I'll never come to really fully comprehend if I'm a bad person.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:57:58 2021 No.17715290 >>17708653 the more I grow up the truer those words seem to me

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 17:58:07 2021 No.17715291 How long until this 'woke' shit collapses in on itself and goes away? It's getting tedious. If the answer is never then I'm moving to some backwater shithole where I'll never have to see it again.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 18:03:42 2021 No.17715333
File: 64 KB, 687x627, 1456724320492.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

I've come to realize I don't actually hate niggers as much as I thought. Considering that this is 4chan I hope someone out there can appreciate the monumentality of this moment. Instead, it's something else entirely. Ultimately I hate the fact that I can't hate niggers, that there's always some insipid counter reaction from well meaning anthro-cattle at the first suggestion of aversion to any things nigger-like. It's the nature of their reaction or defense too...as though having the thought itself is what sets them off, some intolerable break from orthodoxy. It doesn't matter to them in the slightest there's been no discriminatory action or that even if such was desirable it is already illegal and needs none of their championing. No, what they can't abide is the crime of having thoughts they've been taught are impermissible. I just asked my friend of sometime if I'm not allowed to hate blacks in private, even in my own head, provided I don't harm anyone, how is that wrong? Am I not entitled to my reasons, or opinions? They gave me the usual conditioned babble insisting there was something wrong with me and all normal people are like him instead and that our association had grown more questionable with my unwillingness to conform. And it was in that moment I realized...I hated him more than I ever did any nigger, he wasn't white anymore or even human, instead he was some species of weasel.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 18:07:23 2021 No.17715353

>>17715291
I started growing my hair out and got a tan. I began telling people I was part native American, trans, and homosexual and began haranguing them with their own game. Wokeshit is just another opportunity for fun, embrace it. Only idiots take SJWs seriously.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 18:07:52 2021 No.17715361

Love is so magnificent and terrifying. I wonder how God feels, loving all of us with the intensity we save for those closest to us, with that force at once so draining and replenishing. Is it natural for Him? He died for us as I would die for a partner, a child. I want to love as Mary did, as Christ did. When I think about this I feel an actual pressure in my chest. I wonder if by letting myself love others, and in the process, trying to be the best version of myself, love will come more easily to me. Is the best me the most loving me? I was pretty seriously abused as a child and have closed myself off to so much. I want everybody to know what it feels like to be loved. I don’t want to run away from the warmth any longer. I am tired of second-guessing and constsntly scanning and scanning for ulterior motives. I won’t let the knots in my stomach and my chest—the clammy and cool fear that seizes my hands—hold me back from becoming a more kind person. I don’t love myself very much at all and so I have a hard time wrapping my mind around the idea of Me As A Person Being Worthy Of Love, but I will not shy away from a gift so great, even if it means being vulnerable. None of us were worthy of Christ’s love, but sometimes love requires forgiveness. I forgive my parents for their actions and words. I hope, for my children, I can be a better example.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 18:08:44 2021 No.17715371 >>17715213 What time of year do you usually camp?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 18:09:46 2021 No.17715375 >>17715160 I suppose. They are solitary so they feel like they don’t count. I would like to learn the guitar but that too is solitary.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 18:17:48 2021 No.17715423 >>17715213 Actually nvm, don't reply. I don't give a crap, really.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 19:00:17 2021 No.17715676 >>17715423 Not very based

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 19:05:38 2021 No.17715703 south parl s1e1 is pretty based after all

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 19:17:03 2021 No.17715759 >>17711700 do it. I did it and after that, I got the confidence I needed to go in the real world and fuck actual girls. A year later I found a gf even

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 20:11:18 2021 No.17716036

People on this site love to say that fat girls stink, but I've dated a girl who was well over 200 pounds and she didn't stink at all. She actually smelled quite nice, because she liked to wear perfume. Is it just that most people who say this have the bad fortune of winding up with fat girls who also have poor hygiene?

Frater Asemlen !XS8vrClKs2 Sat Mar 6 20:11:25 2021 No.17716037

Just Sharing a poem I really enjoyed reading.

“A letter sent to my elder cousin”

Shutting the gates, I feel the autumn wind—
My loneliness is due to our long parting.
Beneath a white sky the great wilderness stretches,
A killing blast sweeps the wide heaven and earth
Shining dew weeps over withered orchids,
Cry of insects sounds out night and day.
In my cold room the candle-stump burns dim,
My red silk curtains tattered by the wind.
I open my books to the old scent of rue,
Sing resentfully now your handsome face has gone.
For a hundred days we have not seen each other,
Bright flowers fade in this bitter season.

Of all my brothers, who worries most about me?
I already have the letter you sent to me.
Clad in blue jacket, riding a white horse,
You send your drafts up to the Eastern Gate-towers.
In my dream we are laughing together—
Then I wake to a half-moon over my bed.
Endless my thoughts, like a bracelet on my wrist,
My sorrows run wild like spreading arrowroot.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 20:27:44 2021 No.17716143

I've been struggling with confidence and self-destructive behavior lately. I wrote this about it. Don't know if it's good or anything, but I just wanted to share.

FEAR.
'You!!
You're me.
Just like in the meme.
But still
you're talking to me.
I dislike you.
But more than that
You rule me.'

'Oh yes, I do, from time to time
But I will ask you:
What makes you follow me?
Why can I take you from yourself
and give you nothing in return?
I sell empty pleasures and a fleeting insight,
some skills and knowledge that you someday could use.
But no,
You know
That's what you tell yourself about me.
I can only give what I simply am.
I won't stop trading my empty promises
for your time and lacking courage,
But know this
If the market will remain free for me to tread
In time, the only goods still in demand
Will yield me five fortunes of dread.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 20:53:47 2021 No.17716271 >>17715423 Why are you impersonating me?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 21:48:49 2021 No.17716560

I think about her everyday
Every morning when I wake up
Every night before I go to bed
Every time I hear my phone ring
Every time I listen to music we shared
Every time I watch a show we shared
Every time I lay in the bed we shared
Every time I dream I pray to see her there

I only wish I didn't have to think for her to be in my life

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 22:21:07 2021 No.17716753 I’ve been alive for almost 28 years now but I usually feel like I have the development of a 17 year old.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 22:30:03 2021 No.17716797

>>17715759
Not the guy you're responding to but a curious observer. What is banging a hooker like? I'm sure it varies from place to place of course, but in your experience? I just can't imagine sex without the passion. Even sex with strangers is passionate in the moment. Do they attempt to replicate that passion or do they just go straight to business? Do they just lie there in front with spread legs and tell you to get to work? I'm oddly curious

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 22:51:00 2021 No.17716908 >>17710795 What generals are you referring to?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 22:58:02 2021 No.17716954 Having a job versus not having a job is just trading in one set of troubles for another. There's no win condition.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:02:27 2021 No.17716979

>>17716753
I felt the same way, although I did a lot of growing up recently. Turns out Spending the first the years that are critical to your development shut in stunts things a little.

There's also a tendency to think that maturity tracks with age. That's only true to an extent. They're correlated, but in reality maturity tracks to experience. And you can get a lot of that in a little time or a little of it in a lot.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:04:08 2021 No.17716987 They should try to fix that whole "antidepressant meds sometimes making you feel way shittier than before" thing.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:06:22 2021 No.17716997 >>17708641 God bless, anon. You'll see him again. He would want you to dwell on the memories and feel nothing but the good, and not feel weighed down by the grief simply for the sake of grief.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:07:31 2021 No.17717002
File: 27 KB, 209x336, 53120D47-19C3-45C4-B034-8A6D9B5FCE59.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Do any of you have books which you think might be a waste of time reading because they take away time from reading other, more important books but you love them so you continue reading them anyway?

At what age does this no longer become appropriate to read and write such juvenile books?

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:09:52 2021 No.17717014

>>17716979
I actually had to grow up pretty fast given family circumstances but in that context grown up is like 18, 19. I feel like I haven’t really matured beyond that since then. Like I said, I’m going to be 28 soon and I feel like I behave, think, feel in a way that’s appropriate for a college sophomore.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:12:16 2021 No.17717022 The problem I'm stuck with, is that during periods of high amounts of work to do, I frequently just do not read at all. This results in around 3-4 month periods of not reading sometimes :'(

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:16:23 2021 No.17717043

>>17716997
thank you. he died of a very rare and aggressive facial nerve cancer and in his last days he fell very frequently and i remember seeing him covered in huge black-and-purple bruises and it makes me so sad. no man deserves to go from healthy to that in under 25 days. he had a good life and was surrounded by all of his grandchildren, his wife, and his children as he passed away. i loved him and remember him for his characteristic gruffness and his secret soft heart. i hope i will see him again. thanks for your reply, anon.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:20:57 2021 No.17717070 >>17716954 Life as a whole is a no-win situation. In theory, you can transcend the entropy and even death itself through heroic action, but that hardly seems possible in modern times.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:21:02 2021 No.17717072

>>17717014

That's not as unusual as you might think. People in our age group tend to have this arrested development thing going on, delayed life goals from the shitty economy that hit us right at the worst time etc. Not to mention we've lived half our lives on the internet which isn't conducive to anything but itself.

I was typically moody until about 23, and gradually came more self-controlled with that to the point only a significant life disruption disturbs my equanimity. For the most part only when it comes to relationships I'm a bumbling teen. That becomes punishing especially since after a while the expectation is you have some ability to hold it together there.

Importantly, it's helpful to remember that stupidity knows no age, so don't mistake your foolishness for inexperience. I've made mistakes someone twice my age could have easily made and someone half it could have avoided.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:22:05 2021 No.17717079 >>17717070 The only way to win at life is to achieve philosophic wisdom and transcend expectations :^)

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:26:08 2021 No.17717105 Everything's designed to internalise and sublimate instinct into worthless substitute activities If I was a school principal I'd teach all the boys hunting, boxing and greco-roman wrestling

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:27:11 2021 No.17717115 >>17717072 Agreed. Once I left high school, I was forced to become a man in an instant. I did not actually feel like one until 23. The real world as an adult finally transformed me after a youth of inertia.

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:31:15 2021 No.17717132

>>17717072
>>17717115

23 is about the time when I began to feel like an 'adult' for the first time too. A lot of those anxieties of youth gave way to more self-confidence and although life isn't easy and there's still a lot of uncertainty, I feel more equipped to deal with it all. Obviously I still feel out of my depth from time to time, but 23 was when I no longer felt like a big teenager. Many of my friends say the same thing.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:36:09 2021 No.17717160 why should I deserve love? pls no christcuck nonsense

Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:37:39 2021 No.17717169

>>17717132
I had a feeling that I could have developed more during adolescence like I think people did way back in the day. The pre-boomer generations. There was no extended adolescence before boomers. Your teenage years formed you and you were already a man at like 19 or 20. Better late than never.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:39:54 2021 No.17717181 >>17712745 same, it's insane the power they hold over us

Frater Asemlen !XS8vrClKs2 Sat Mar 6 23:41:06 2021 No.17717185

Lament of an empty Soul

the purple song of twilight fills the sky
willow emeralds have become rust
Torpor’s taste rests in my mouth
tears of sky cover orchids
a pale hand grasps my own
but I am not yet ready
my heart’s flame turns to ash
perfumed with rue

sapphire shadows pass through the sky
in darkness I rest singing songs of sadness
remember the cold moon
as she stares, forgetting her own form
nothing is behind the eye
nothing
Lost, so long have I not known the way
And I am too ashamed to ask

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:53:12 2021 No.17717223 File: 23 KB, 474x391, 1595709971980.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] I'm talking to a high school girl and it's going well. I think we're going to start dating. Also, I'm close to finishing Gravity's Rainbow.

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:54:54 2021 No.17717232 >>17717223 how old are you?

>>	Anonymous Sat Mar 6 23:57:08 2021 No.17717245 >>17717232 20

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 00:00:22 2021 No.17717260 File: 210 KB, 1000x750, 1615071943500.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17708528 >write what’s on your mind armpits, suicide, tomboys, pop punk, tfw no gf, whiteness, nature, silent films, VN's, youth, missing my friends, L4D2

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 00:13:28 2021 No.17717306

I've been thinking about loving and liking for the longest time now. I would like to say that I love everyone and everything in existence, whether it be myself, my brothers or even the man across the street. Obviously, I don't love them in some sort of sexual way but more so platonic, yet describing it as platonic to me also seems too vague. It's a love born not because I can understand the complexity of man, but rather because I am able to witness it. It follows that I do not 'like' every person, and will oft disagree with or simply dislike another, yet this should never detract from love. The more I witness the more I am tested, the atrocities of man (which retrospectively tend to be normal) continually leave me taken aback and subsequently make me question whether or not I truly love every man. I am not trying to become God in this universal love, but I wonder if I subconsciously am, why should I not strive to be?

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 00:27:35 2021 No.17717375

Thinking about HER and how I fucked it up beyond repair. I hadn't thought about her seriously for like a year but tonight I decided to stalk her a bit and first it came gradually but now it just hit me like a train what a fucking retard I am. It sounds dramatic but I honestly can't imagine there being anyone else, I had my chance and now it's gone forever.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 00:31:06 2021 No.17717390 File: 1.31 MB, 4917x7016, 1615079411539.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17709753 desu I haven't bothered making threads for like a week lol

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 00:45:34 2021 No.17717461 >>17708528 I fucking loathed the fucking idiots who reply to shitpost and trolls. And when called out on it, try to absolved themselves.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 01:00:45 2021 No.17717523 File: 665 KB, 800x1100, 1597127793289.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] I want a gyro and french fries

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 01:56:09 2021 No.17717773 I wish I was born and raised in Japan

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 02:01:20 2021 No.17717794

If I quit watching porn, will my lust for women and life come back? I’m 27. I watch porn almost everyday and have for years. I think I’m pretty normal. I don’t get into really depraved stuff and I don’t have trouble getting hard. However, I just don’t have the same lustful appetite I had when I was 17. I don’t imagine things like I used to and I don’t really have any crazy strong drive to get out there and have romance like I used to. Part of me feels like that’s just normal given how things are but I want that feeling back.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 02:03:51 2021 No.17717806 >>17717461 this thread isn't even /lit/ it's "write what's on your mind" (aka bullshit) you have fallen into the classic gaff of doing a hypocrisy.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 02:05:05 2021 No.17717814 >>17717806 I just want to vent, if only a little.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 02:28:05 2021 No.17717922 >>17717794 Yes bro Stop jacking off for a week as well and see your doc for TRT if that doesn't work either, higher test is a game changer

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 02:31:55 2021 No.17717944 >>17717814 now you're trying to absolve yourself!

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 02:36:43 2021 No.17717974
File: 987 KB, 500x452, 1445318770495.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>17709423
my mum beat me and verbally abused me then left the internet to raise me. she constantly told me I was worthless and a piece of shit whatever vitriol she could think of then she would beat me in fits of rage

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 02:58:33 2021 No.17718083 >>17709391 No, Zoomers will destroy civilization as a well-intentioned overreaction to Millenials. The road to Hell...

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 03:06:52 2021 No.17718116 I'm browsing on my phone and I keep getting ads for some strawberry shortcake "berry cake" r34 porn

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 03:41:41 2021 No.17718266 "Everyone is the hero of his own story" is a proposition that is rarely treated with the appropriate seriousness.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 03:42:07 2021 No.17718270 Are there any books about older (+25) men falling in love for the first time?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 03:51:27 2021 No.17718311 >>17718266 I'm the protagonist of the world's shittiest greek tragedy.

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 03:55:45 2021 No.17718328

I think I found my boat, it is one I have been watching for about two years, started way over priced but is now quite reasonable, dropped almost 10k from its original list. It is just about perfect for my needs, right size, already setup for single handing, most of the gear has been updated, just need to do some odds and ends like paint the hull, oil the wood work and some minor maintenance. Will need to do some major interior rework, but I always planned on doing that regardless of the boat I got. Emailed them about the boat, should check it out this week and if there are no major problems I will be buying it, which means I will be living on it by June 1st at the latest and be setting out for the world come end of summer. It is weird to have this finally happening, I worked towards it for so long and life caused me to have to start over a few times, I did not realize it but I had become complacent in my rut, every time I was nearly out of it, something pushed me back in, I had accepted it as my life. This is leaving me somewhat hesitant to pursuing this boat, feels like the second I stick my head out of the rut I will get hit by life again. But I am doing it, and in the past few weeks of active boat hunting my passions and desires have started to return. I had come to see getting a boat as an escape, but I am seeing that it will not be that and as it comes closer to happening I am finding myself being drawn towards people more and am excited by the idea of those I will meet on my travels and the cities I will explore. I no longer dream of being in the middle of the ocean with an unbroken horizon, certain of my solitude. They have a few other boats which would work for me, not as ideal and will take more work to get ready, but I do not mind, think if this one falls through I will buy one of them.

I am also thinking I may buy a small chunk of land, there are a good number of of small lots of a few acres outside of town which are dirt cheap because they can not be built on. I can put up a yurt and make it the winter get away, come home every few years to get snowed in and enjoy the cold.

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 04:13:32 2021 No.17718399
File: 1.85 MB, 800x939, savlia-droid-1.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

One time, me and the boys did a bunch of acid and went to a rave. I don't like electronic music, and every song seemed to follow the same pattern. This was ten years ago when dubstep was popular, so every song had a buildup, a bass drop, then a breakdown. The repetition was an endless, maddening loop. Looking around at the dumb outfits, the whores wearing angel wings, the underage teenage butts I wanted to grab yet couldn't, and that terrible loop of soulless e-music, I eventually lulled into a trance, became unresponsive, and retracted deep into the back of my mind.
I can't tell you what I saw, but I now believe in synchronicity and eternal soul. I know that consciousness is endless, and the universe is an endless cycle of birth and rebirth, of god creating himself. This type of boring spiritual tripe has been echoed by religions for centuries, but ever since that day I realize it's true. Thank you for reading my blog post. Heil Hitler.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 04:19:22 2021 No.17718422 >>17718399 I honestly wish druggies would drop off the face of the earth so I wouldn't have to accidentally read their retarded philosophizing

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 04:21:44 2021 No.17718431 >>17708893 Explain?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 04:21:47 2021 No.17718434 Seems like science is just another religion with its apostles and clergy.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 04:21:49 2021 No.17718435 >>17718422 Do drugs, incel.

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 04:52:31 2021 No.17718569

I am disgusted with "artists". From people who just want to sell porn to "pros" whose shtick is
>So social media is very negative, and quitting has benefited me as an artist. Please like and subscribe, and follow me on Twitter Facebook and Instagram!
>Social media is great but it can be totally addictive teehee amirite?
No it's not, if you look at this professionally will never get addicted because it's garbage. Why would you even say that? This is just a marketing video full of agreeable bullshit for retards and kids who can't see through it.
>Social media is great to express yourself and find like-minded people, you do that by retweeting trending things like a robot
>You shouldn't care about getting likes lol just do everything it takes to get as many as possible
>Draw what you really love! Of course what I really love is generic, safe, Disney tier shit carefully crafted to be as marketable as possible.
All creativity and expression are way on the bottom of anyone's priorities. It's all pandering and hustling and boot-licking. And I understand that but I hate it so much when they pretend they're genuine. Literally everything they do is engineered for agreeability from the ground up. And of course they just lie and lie about their craft as well. It's all bullshit and lies and hustling. Artists disgust me, they're so crooked.
And then the out of touch whores, of course
>trust me on this advice I am a professional illustrator
>what do you draw?
>porn fanart lol
I hate all of them. And every time I rant about this there's a bunch of porn addicts who need to whiteknight their favorite hookers.
What a rotten world full of rotten people. As always out species has made the worst possible use of good things. It was all a mistake, science was a mistake. Maybe that was the point of the apple.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 04:55:21 2021 No.17718577 >>17716036 I work in a hospital and fat people FUCKING STINK. Being here has actually made me less compassionate towards the obese, and everyday I wish I were born without a sense of smell

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 04:55:45 2021 No.17718580 File: 104 KB, 376x402, you.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17718435

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:01:45 2021 No.17718603 File: 40 KB, 749x553, ES8RycoWoAUzn4I.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17718580

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:03:31 2021 No.17718612 >>17716036 >I've dated a girl who was well over 200 pounds your opinion is invalid

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:21:33 2021 No.17718693

there are two ideas about who God is, basically. it might be blasphemous to even claim such a thing, but hear me out. All religions have an idea of some form of enlightenment. Enlightenment is the ultimate, the "highest" order of consciousness, with which comes the realization that all consciousness is one. One. Non-relative. Much like the idea of the monotheist God. In this scenario God is something like the life that animates us. I believe many christians hold this belief. Probably many sufis do.

The other idea is that even though ultimate reality is one, still it is only that- ultimate reality. There could be things absolutely ineffable, absolutely unknowable. In this scenario there is still a strong case for the One God, since all of creation clearly happens through the one consciousness (this much can be experienced). But the Creator Itself is not just unknowable, but probably even unapproachable other than by the distinct order he has established for us to come as close as possible, but which then, again, only amounts to "great signs" rather than direct knowledge.

The thing is that the one consciousness is good. Some say this is the point of Jesus' message, that the spirit is good, which is... philosophically odd, and another great sign. Because the spirit has no features, you see, so its goodness is unexplainable as far as I know. It has nothing of its own, and yet it has character. So if you take it to be ultimate reality, then goodness is inherently different from and superior-in-the-ontological-order-to all else, and by realizing ultimate reality (this is the aim of meditative practice, I believe, and worship for that matter: the realization of the character of the spirit, the ultimate knowable reality) you are freed from the fetters of lower-order reality and you become a saint, marked by your love for all. Good, right. But what if that "ultimate reality" isn't God. Sure, even in the unknowable Creator scenario, clearly the Creator distinguished goodness, but it still stands to reason that the "character of God" is unknowable, because everything about the Creator is then unknowable. If one is to take ones aim at this Great Unknown... I don't know if you will personify love, but the thing is that autistically it might be motivated.

I've been thinking about this for about half a year now.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:24:28 2021 No.17718706 File: 617 KB, 718x830, 17.57.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>17718603

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:25:01 2021 No.17718710

>>17718693
>There could be things absolutely ineffable, absolutely unknowable.
well there couldn't, but the point is that language fails here. but the fact that language fails is not really evidence of... well to take that as indication of the end is anthropomorphising, it's saying that just because we lack faculties there can't be anything more

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:30:00 2021 No.17718731 >>17718693 Enlightenment is not a Christian belief and it's not central to Christianity anyway

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:31:49 2021 No.17718738 >>17718731 I think this is what is meant by rebirth in spirit. it's possible the concept has been bastardised by the perceived need to baptize everyone, at which point they are supposed to be reborn in spirit. but there is the beatific vision

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:33:11 2021 No.17718743 I would like to die soon.

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:46:21 2021 No.17718794

I've always been an atheist and have controversial opinions on everything, but I'm only interested in women that were brought up well, went to church, don't discuss politics, and are humble. Even if a woman says something I agree with, if it's philosophical of related to politics I find it unelegant. They should be interested in art and Beauty.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:47:32 2021 No.17718800 >>17718328 >painting hull and oiling woodwork My hands do not envy you. Other than that good work. You might want to look into getting land with mooring though. Mooring costs are a bitch.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 05:54:26 2021 No.17718832 >>17718743 Why?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:13:40 2021 No.17718923 >>17717794 the fact that you can't just try it for yourself without asking here should tell you enough

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:27:38 2021 No.17719001 >>17709391 >grew up in a society on the brink of collapse with no culture and no purpose >are shitty people Really activates the almonds. Maybe you should look back at the people who raised the millennials and doomed the world they grew up in.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:31:04 2021 No.17719015 File: 139 KB, 720x686, Eu6JyQ5VkAMyTv5.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] I want to talk to and meet some new people. You may not rest now.#6011 if anyone wants to chat about anything from vidya to history and books/writing.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:31:06 2021 No.17719016 >>17719001 Maybe you should look at the world as a spirit and stop blaming 'generations'

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:36:39 2021 No.17719048 >>17719016 >"millennials are the worst and ruined everything" >well the world was already fucked by boomers by the time millennials were born >"s-stop blaming generations for your problems!"

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:36:51 2021 No.17719050

>>17718800
I don't mind such work, really looking forward to redesigning the interior.

Mooring is cheap to free unless it is a busy location, dock and slip fees are what are often expensive. Here it is $60 a season for a mooring and free for short term mooring, $2-3K for a seasons worth of dockage, 20 miles away you can get it for under $1K. My land will be on or near freshwater which gets a tad thick for a boat come winter, boat would be hauled out anytime I decide to get snowed in for the season, probably will happen around the same time the hull needs bottom paint.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:40:19 2021 No.17719068 I am 5ft 10in and I wish with all my heart that I was 6ft 0in. I'm always regarded as short, yet I see guys 1-2 inches taller than me frequently described as tall. It's so damn frustrating to be so close to the cutoff, but not quite have made it.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:50:26 2021 No.17719097 >>17719068 same but with penis length

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:50:39 2021 No.17719099 >>17719068 You don't know how good you have it, imagine being 5'5 like me.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 06:55:47 2021 No.17719115 >>17719068 You will feel tall once you have someone shorter than you who needs you to get things off of high shelves.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 07:10:23 2021 No.17719177 >>17719115 My ex was 5ft 3in and gave me shit for being short. She is now with somebody who is about 5ft 7in, though, so take from that what you will.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 07:13:56 2021 No.17719195 >>17719068 >I see guys 1-2 inches taller than me frequently described as tall kek the memes are real

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 07:18:50 2021 No.17719216 >>17719177 >My ex was 5ft 3in and gave me shit for being short. She was just a retard, don't worry about it.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 07:42:25 2021 No.17719338 >>17719068 > 1 - 2 inches taller Literally just put on some different shoes..

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 07:44:45 2021 No.17719358 >>17719177 > My ex was 5ft 3in and gave me shit for being short. She is now with somebody who is about 5ft 7in, though, so take from that what you will. Sounds like you're not 'short' in stature you just have a short vibe.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 07:47:51 2021 No.17719375 >>17719358 I do think you're right with that. I've had people deny that I am 5ft 10in until I stand next to them.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:06:24 2021 No.17719470 >>17719050 Fees there are way less than here. Mooring fees on rivers here are like dockage fees there, and to afford a dock, you either have to own waterfrontage or be a millionaire, which are in practice the same thing.

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:15:46 2021 No.17719537
File: 188 KB, 837x1200, unnamed.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>17708528
I want to stop being knee-jerk ironic; reflecting on it, its just a cope that covers up my problems in a thin veneer of humor so I don't have to take them seriously, while also letting me pretend I am addressing my problems.

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:19:48 2021 No.17719569

My imagination has always been dull, I often have trouble imagining the things that happen in book. But there is one exception, whenever I see something disgusting or scary or that I simply do not like, my imagination goes into overdrive and I cannot delete the image from my head. For example today I saw some gore thing and I've spent all day with that image in my mind, without being able to get rid of it.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:43:04 2021 No.17719688 >>17719569 what did you saw ?

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:48:06 2021 No.17719710 >>17719569 Welcome to hell my friend

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:51:32 2021 No.17719723 >>17719569 browse the internet with images off unless you know you won't stumble on that shit everything becomes better when you browse on an allow basis rather than a filter basis

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:52:15 2021 No.17719725 I have no real knowledge on poetry or poets but "An Irish Airman foresees his Death" by Yeats is of great reverence to me.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:53:34 2021 No.17719732 >>17718832 I’m just tired and also I guess, more than a little unsatisfied.

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:56:35 2021 No.17719744

>>17719537
You know funnily, due to the way I was raised and the type of sense of humour my parents had I've always moved through life with a completely cyncial and ironic mindset. I can't help but make some sarcastic comment (whether internally to myself, or verbally to others) about the various inane things I see in day to day life. My parents were the same way. Something as simple as a goofy ad or a typo on a shop sign provokes some sort of ironic commentary. Recently I've been catching myself halfway through these thoughts just exhausted, without the will to complete them. It's so tiring being a smart ass. More and more I want to engage with the world sincerely.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 08:58:39 2021 No.17719751 >>17719725 I worded that like a retard please forgive me anons it's very late.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 09:03:54 2021 No.17719775 >>17708528 Get fucked stupid commie.

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 09:09:43 2021 No.17719801

>>17708528
Hurts to know men do not take me seriously because I am a woman. However, I cannot relate to the man that gets thrown to prison by a false accusation made by a woman. I can't relate to the man that lost his children in a custody battle in favour of the woman, even if the woman is unfit to care for the kids and even herself. I don't know what men go through to conform to society's roles to attract a woman, as women are more picky than men when it comes to dating.
I am sorry men, I didn't know the pain you went through and I still will never know because I am not a man. Even though your insults hurt my feelings, I feel bad that you go through worst than what women go through in western society. I am sorry.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 09:09:50 2021 No.17719803 >>17708528 As the party that I wasn't in ended, I felt alone again, but alone in a introspective way, more like in a philosophical stance rather than actual sadness

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 09:12:31 2021 No.17719812 >>17719801 its okay

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 09:12:45 2021 No.17719814

>>17719744
i can relate to it too. I grew up in a family which communicates mainly in cynicism, sarcasm and humor. It very easy to fall into this pit and write off anything else in this manner. I want to become more sincere and direct but it's extremely hard to do so.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 09:38:12 2021 No.17719938 >>17718270 I’m sure they exist but it does feel like of over for us older guys in terms of romance, or at least romantic media. God forbid you consume Japanese stuff. It’s all high schoolers. It’s no wonder I feel like my life is over at 27 years old.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 09:41:56 2021 No.17719959 >>17719938 >it does feel like of over for us older guys in terms of romance, or at least romantic media it really does feel like that. It's either romantic stuff about young people or older people feeling love again after x amount of years.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 10:12:58 2021 No.17720075 File: 54 KB, 720x556, 1615116728042.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] i hate trannies

Anonymous Sun Mar 7 10:21:24 2021 No.17720108

>>17719959
Well, that’s romanticism. Obviously, it’s not realistic but it does sting a bit. There’s something of the poetry and the beauty in it all that’s lost on people our age I guess. In that sense, I guess I feel like it is somewhat realistic. Why are you asking for this anyway? I’m going to guess there’s some personal insecurities at work here? If that’s the case, rest assured I can sympathize.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 10:28:25 2021 No.17720153 >>17719801 Lmao ywnbaw

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 10:30:12 2021 No.17720169 >>17719801 don't be one of those ''pick me'' girls, it's undignified

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 10:30:45 2021 No.17720174 >>17720108 I guess im looking some works where i could relate with protagonist. Seems like i'm asking for too much.

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 10:46:20 2021 No.17720263 >>17712745 stop posting kpop you faggots

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 10:47:47 2021 No.17720278 >>17718270 Lolita

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 10:47:49 2021 No.17720279 bump limit >>17720273 >>17720273 >>17720273

>>	Anonymous Sun Mar 7 14:05:54 2021 No.17721606 >>17710365 there’s no such thing as a postmodernist vision of goodness wtf are you talking about

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/lit/ - Literature