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/lit/ - Literature

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17304501 No.17304501 [Reply] [Original]

Get /lit/ interested in reading non existent book by posting its first line/paragraph.

>I woke up one morning having unexpectedly developed an Irish accent.

>> No.17304503

Holy... I want more

>> No.17304522

>>17304501

In the cobbled alleyway under the presence of the moon, the raven-haired woman with pitch black eyes dawdled.

>> No.17304527

>I find myself, for no reason at all (except perhaps the brief encounter with a large Filipino man who insisted that I have better posture--"Head down, is bad for the man; bad for the soul" he kept repeating) yes today I find myself violently racist; walking past a nice coffee shop, the same one I always pass, my mind would not relent from thinking only of the Jews and their trickery--I wonder if there are any Filipino Jews?

>> No.17304577

>>17304501

Throughout the story, we will switch perspectives between I myself, Juan and friends. This tale is completely true, at least in the abstract definition of the word.

>> No.17304583

>>17304522
why do only women and soys write like this?

>> No.17304674

>>17304583
because they think it sounds captivating but it's actually just shit; likely due to a generation of kids growing up on fanfiction.net.

>> No.17304675

>>17304527
based
I'd read it

>> No.17304877

>>17304501
6/10
>>17304522
0/10
>>17304527
8/10
>>17304577
3/10
>>17304583
6/10

>I am, among other things, horny.

>> No.17304933

>yesterday I deadlifted the 150kg of my father's corpse

>> No.17304989
File: 27 KB, 800x450, sad_frog.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
17304989

>>17304583
>>17304674
>>17304877

>> No.17305101

“I mean, what’s the problem with writing your name in the snow with pee?” Just told her that 5 seconds ago. What the fuck was I thinking? Girls can’t aim their pee. Fuck! Now she’s... smiling?

>> No.17305117

>>17305101
Not a bad concept, but the execution is lacking.

>> No.17305210

>>17305117
How would you phrase it? Sincerely asking

>> No.17305221

>>17305101
Where can I buy this?

>> No.17305274

>The jackrabbit who loved only me asked that I move in with him.

>> No.17305387

>>17304501
J'ai encore le cul qui gratte putain ! Je peux pas me gratter le cul au milieu du métro... C'est horrible ! Depuis le temps que ça me prend ces gratouillis il faudrait vraiment que j'aille voir mon docteur... L'horreur ! "-Bonjour docteur j'ai le cul qui gratte. -mmh oui d'accord, déshabillez vous et penchez vous sur cette table." Il va croire que je suis pédé, que je me suis fait enculer... Putain ça gratte fort quand je me retiens de gratter ! Saloperie de cul, ça se déchire dès que je chie trop fort... Ah l'enfer ! Ça grouille de vers là-dedans... Je me torche trop fort aussi ça doit être ça, ça fini toujours avec du sang sur le papier quand il y a plus de merde. Je devrais acheter des lingettes ou truc comme ça. AHHHHH ! c'est trop fort putain ! il y a vraiment trop de monde dans la rame... bon, peut-être que si je pète ça soulagera un peu... non rien à faire... bon je vais essayer de me gratter le cul discrètement sur la poignée de la porte. Mmmmmmh enfin, ça fait du bien !
>My asshole itches again! I can't scratch my ass in the middle of the subway ... it's horrible! Since the time that it takes me these itchings I should really go see my doctor ... Horror! "-Hello doctor, my ass is itchy. -Mmh yes okay, take off your clothes and bend over this table." He'll think I'm a faggot, that I got my ass fucked ... Fuck it itches really hard when I stop myself from scratching! Damn ass, it rips as soon as I shit too hard ... Ah hell! It swarms with worms in there ... I wipe myself too hard too that must be it, I always ends up with blood on the paper when there is no more shit. I should buy wipes or something. AHHHHH! it's too fucking strong! there are really too many people in the train ... well, maybe if I fart it will relieve a little ... no nothing to do ... good I will try to scratch my ass discreetly on the handle of the door. Mmmmmmh finally, it feels good!

>> No.17306421

>>17305387
>One sentence

>> No.17306473

"NIGGERS could be here"