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17001489 No.17001489 [Reply] [Original]

I am pretty sure God hates me and has designed this world solely to torment me. Any books that will change me perspective?

>> No.17001494

>>17001489
Evil is necessary to bring you closer to God.

>> No.17001511

>>17001489
God is human fiction and you're not the center of the universe. be humble

>> No.17001611

>>17001494
But I am not Job. If he is testing me than I already failed thousand times. Sometimes its absurdly funny how any given situation can produce the absolute worst outcome. Also the whole thing pushed me closer to gnosticism since christian God cant be this evil.
>>17001511
In a random universe its almost impossible to lose dice roll million times in a row. I stopped being agnostic because of this and now firmly believe in God (altough malevolent one)

>> No.17001681
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17001681

There once was king who could provide no heir. He searched the whole of his country and found a suitable young lad to succeed him who was humble in origin and found to possess a high degree of intelligence. Unbeknownst to the boy, he was to become king if upon reaching maturity he was found to be endowed with all manner of virtue and entrusted with the crown and scepter. If however, he turned out to be the meanest sort of man, he was to be thrown into the galleys with all ignominy and disgrace. Now, the boy was given to a professor who took great diligence to raise him. He would teach him a lesson and then leave assigning him books and homework for study. Whereupon his return, the books and all studies were cast to the furthest corner of the room and the boy would be building little pottery houses. The professor world rebuke him and overturn with his foot the little pottery houses he had built, saying to him "Oh, if you only knew what you were forfeiting by these childish games". The boy would cry but would forget these thrashing by next day and do it again. The boy being all boy learned little from his time with the professor and soon became a man and was thrown into the stinking dungeon for the rest of his days. You may take it from me he grieved bitterly enough at this but I wager he felt much more grief from having squandered his chance to be king all for the sake of idle play. My dear people, so too is it with the Lord on high. He overturns and confounds our designs and knocks down whatever little mud houses and machinations we have. Not because he hates us, but because he dearly loves us and wishes to take away the impediments of this world.

>> No.17001821

>>17001681
But I want thing

>> No.17001843

>>17001489
God is there, but >>17001511 is right in that these thoughts are narcissistic.

>> No.17002500
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17002500

>>17001681
But all the misfortune made me considerably worse person. If God wanted me to improve surely he wouldnt burden me with more than I can bear (and often in very ironic ways)? Also I would still like some book recs

>> No.17002513

>>17001489
>>17002500
Have you read the Book of Job? Seems like that would be a good place to start, after that looking at commentaries on Job should get you further answers on this type of question.

>> No.17002756

>>17002513
But the difference is abrahamic God knew Job would pass the trial due to his omnipotence. My situation is more comparable to me punishing a baby for failling trigonometry test. Also my suffering is considerably worse than what Job went trough

>> No.17002896

>>17002756
>Also my suffering is considerably worse than what Job went trough
Greentext or didn't happen

>> No.17002991
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17002991

I'm actually amazed by how many old people stumble into Gnosticism without even knowing what it is.

My grandparents were good people, but after all the shit they went through in their lives, they grew to hate anyone who would bring up god or religion in any positive context.
My grandfather got visibly angry and almost physical when his daughter repeated that trite line "God works in mysterious ways"

An old woman I met told me she wanted to spit in God's face and beat the shit out of him for the suffering he put her dead son through.
Privatio boni might be one of the most hilariously immature concepts to spawn out of YHWHism

>> No.17003113
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17003113

>>17001489

>> No.17003134

>>17001494
That doesn’t make any sense

>> No.17003157

>>17001489
>I am pretty sure God hates me and has designed this world solely to torment me.
How many cancers have you had?

>>17002500
>all the misfortune made me considerably worse person
As hard as it is to admit to oneself, that's on you.

>> No.17003169

>>17001681
Unexpectedly poetic post. I almost converted midway through

>> No.17003170

>>17003134
Stockholm syndrome/pedagogy of the oppressed.

>> No.17003234

>>17001489
Unironically, the bible.
"If you suffer you get God's money" - Terry A. Davis

>> No.17003304

>>17003134
God in general is a representation of the idea of 'good' (depends on belief system what this good actually is a.e. Christianity, Zoroastrianism). Suffering in the world exists because of the existance of evil which is anything that goes against God, but through the knowledge of suffering and evil you can deduce God (as in proof through negation).

>> No.17003343

>>17001489
Earth is actually just a sort of insane asylum or prison colony that was used as a dumping ground by a far away, more functional race of humans.

>> No.17004427

>>17002896
>>17003157
Its hard to explain, its not as literal suffering as Jobs (losing family/wealth) or getting ass cancer. One of my favorite quotes from Paradise lost is
>“The mind is its own place, and in itself can make a heaven of hell, a hell of heaven..”
However I consider it worse precisly because its not as straightforward. Its basically a string of unending small but very complex humilations that feel like they were prepeared in advance just for me. I know it sounds schizo tier but its almost impossible to describe the feeling you get when you know some omnipotent entity is trying to make you miserable in such insidious way. Even the good things that happen seem to happen only so that worse ones could eventually follow