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/lit/ - Literature

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15066288 No.15066288 [Reply] [Original]

Trollies

>> No.15066461

>>15066288
First I sell all my shares in the trolley company, then I pull the stop.
Then I spend the rest of my life making money by giving talks and writting books about how to pull yourself by your bootstrings.

>> No.15066496

>>15066288
The trolley company employees outnumber those on the tracks by a factor of 100 million.
Please stick to describing the emotions of the people glued to the tracks.

>> No.15066595

>>15066288
More like
>I could stop the trolley but then I wouldn't have trolleys

>> No.15066612

none of you niggers have even seen a trolley in your life

>> No.15066632

>>15066612
My city has an old trolley they use as a tourist trap.
It's really boring.

>> No.15066647

>>15066632
it won't be if you use the tourists for philosophical dilemmas

>> No.15066657

>>15066612
>we're all burgers

>> No.15066791

>>15066612
Philly has at least one trolley line on Girard Avenue.

>> No.15066804

sacrifice a copy of Simon's The Trolley so it derails off the track because it's a shitty book

>> No.15066815

>>15066612
We have them in my city. If they catch you riding one without a ticket, they force you to reenact one of the absurd trolley problems with your fellow passengers

>> No.15066857

Alright janitors, you warned me for my somewhat off-topic thread; now I present exhibit A:

>> No.15066867
File: 29 KB, 300x300, rdj.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15066867

>>15066288
Stop the trolley, but only after it runs over all the people on the track.

>> No.15066872

>>15066461
That's actually against the law. If have inside information and sell your shares for profit, you go to jail and lose the money you made. It's called insider trading.

>> No.15066943
File: 100 KB, 479x271, funnylaughed.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15066943

>>15066872
>law

>> No.15066965

>>15066612
seen a ton a trolleys, stfu i love trollies

>> No.15066992

>>15066288
The company would lose money if their trolly killed a bunch of people regardless of whether or not they were responsible for it from bad PR plus the trolly would have to stop anyway and undergo investigations and delay operations so the cost of stopping the trolly for a bit to not have those people die easily outweighs the cost of running them over and fucking up the trolly company.
You're making a joke but ironically there actually is a financial incentive to not run over those people.

>> No.15067036

>>15066496
And as we all know, trolley companies are the only employers in the world.

>> No.15067057

>>15066992
The trolley company does some PR shit, and keeps the lawsuits tied up in appeals for decades. People forget about it after a few months, and after appeals they pay out $10 to the families of the victims.

>> No.15067067

>>15066867
epic

>> No.15067112

>>15067057
They could do that and lose tons of money running PR campaigns and a shit ton more in court. Contracts will be lost immediately after the fact and there is no recovering that money ever.
OR: Trolly stops in its tracks right before running over a bunch of people and media sensationalism takes the company's name everywhere and gets incalculable amounts of money from the free publicity.

>> No.15067128

>find whoever tried these people to the tracks
>demand he release them, or else

>> No.15067397

>>15066612
Shut the fuck up.

>> No.15067404

>>15066612
My town had a trolley when I was a kid.

>> No.15067420

>>15066595
Gosh, you’re dumb

>> No.15067441

One must imagine the tied people happy
Don't stop the trolley

>> No.15067470

Somebody post a better trolley

>> No.15067494

>>15066791
The 15 ‘African Queen’

>> No.15067498
File: 671 KB, 2448x1844, B34E0BE2-7EA2-4958-9B78-F5F5816A3E21.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15067498

>>15067494
Forgot pic

>> No.15067500
File: 402 KB, 960x619, induction.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15067500

post trolleys you fucking cunts

>> No.15067505

Has anyone read any good japanese novel lately?

>> No.15067506

>>15066872
>That's actually against the law.
Not if you are a member of congress.

>> No.15067521

>>15066612
fuck you my local outlet mall has a dedicated trolley that runs all god damned day and i have ridden on it

>> No.15067527

>>15067420
Nice argument, commie

>> No.15067579

>>15067505
i am currently reading the pillowbook and i've had a grand old time being day drunk reading a list of shit that makes a noble woman from 990 angry

>> No.15067638

>>15067505
dope
>>15067500
why is Hume with a towel in his head? He just bathed?

>> No.15067803

>>15066288
Exactly the situation going on today in the US.
Many will die yet to save some bastards a little cash.

>>15067638
Eastern fashion craze, “orientalism”

>> No.15068076
File: 93 KB, 920x440, corona more like bore-ona.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15068076

>>15067500

>> No.15068088
File: 63 KB, 500x373, Trolley 3.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15068088

>>15067500

>> No.15068097

>>15067498
That's not a trolley. That's a bus.

>> No.15068107

>>15068076
>implying ruining the economy doesn't affect people

>> No.15068123

>>15068107
>being so fucking dense you literally can't comprehend the most basic of concepts even when described in pictures

>> No.15068149

>>15068123
Even if you run over the economy you still end up hurting people.
The economy is made up of people.

>> No.15068157

>>15066288
The first directive from the new town manager was communicated to us by a torn piece of paper that came skipping down the sidewalk of Main Street one day and was picked up by an old woman, who showed it to the rest of us. The paper was made from a pulpy stock and was brownish in color. The writing on the paper looked as if it had been made with charred wood and resembled the same hand that had written those words across the old boards of the town manager’s shed. The message was this: DUSTROY TROLY.

While the literal sense of these words was apparent enough, we were reluctant to act upon a demand that was so obscure in its point and purpose. It was not unprecedented for a new town manager to obliterate some structure or symbol that marked the administration of the one who had come before him, so that the way might be cleared for him to erect a defining structure or symbol of his own, or simply to efface any prominent sign of the previous order and thereby display the presence of a new one. But usually some reason was offered, some excuse was made, for taking this action. This obviously was not the case with the town manager’s instruction to destroy the trolley. So we decided to do nothing until we received some enhancement regarding this matter. Ritter suggested that we might consider composing a note of our own to request further instructions. This note could be left outside the door of the town manager’s shed. Not surprisingly, there were no volunteers for this mission. And until we received a more detailed notice, the trolley would remain intact.

The following morning the trolley came tooting down Main Street for its first run of the day. However, it made no stops for those waiting along the sidewalk. ‘Look at this,’ Leeman said to me as he stared out the front window of his barbershop. Then he went outside. I set my broom against a wall and joined him. Others were already standing on the street, watching the trolley until it finally came to rest at the other end of town. ‘There was no one at the switch,’ said Leeman, an observation that a number of persons echoed. When it seemed that the trolley was not going to make a return trip, several of us walked down the street to investigate. When we entered the vehicle, we found the naked body of Carnes the trolley driver lying on the floor. He had been severely mutilated and was dead. Burned into his chest were the words: DUSTROY TROLY.

We spent the next few days doing exactly that. We also pulled up the tracks that ran the length of the town and tore down the electrical system that had powered the trolley. Just as we were completing these labors, someone spotted another piece of that torn, brownish paper. It was being pushed about by the wind in the sky above us, jerking about like a kite. Eventually it descended into our midst. Standing in a circle around the piece of paper, we read the scrawled words of the message. ‘GUD,’ it said. ‘NXT YUR JBS WULL CHNG.’

>> No.15068161

If there's a bunch of people tied to the tracks it must be for s good reason. Better not to mess with anything.

>> No.15068209

>>15068149
I'm gonna do you a favour and assume you're just pretending to be retarded..

>> No.15068222

>>15068149
Have you looked the image again?

>> No.15068301

>>15068157
Pretty good, kept interested enough the whole time

>> No.15068331

where's the hyperloop version ?

>> No.15068345
File: 49 KB, 903x345, meta-ethical.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15068345

>> No.15068351

>>15068345
Let the trolley hit Kant and then kill Benthan with my bare hands.

>> No.15068365
File: 34 KB, 628x432, 20190204_145254_IMG_3529.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15068365

>> No.15068412

Every time I heard the trolley I'd get excited. Usually I'd be in the kitchen making pancakes and dancing and I'd hear the trolley and immediately run to the bathroom to "take a quick shower." Not this time. No, this time I heard the trolley and stopped dancing and ran outside and ran adjacent the trolley which wouldn't stop no matter how loudly I screamed at the conductor or the passengers. They would hardly even look at me, except for one old woman. She couldn't stop looking. I dance because it shakes and you can't see it if you're wearing clothes.

>> No.15068596

>>15066612
I live in Melbourne

>> No.15068621

>>15066612
I see them every time I go to the supermarket, nigger

>> No.15068722
File: 13 KB, 251x201, dodes-kaden-dodes-kaden.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15068722

You don't need to see the trolley, you just need to feel it, and repeat the sound... dodes-kaden...dodes-kaden...dodes-kaden....

>> No.15068774

>>15067527
Right wingers hate public transport though

>> No.15069105

>>15066791
ain't there also one that goes down market

>> No.15069110

>>15068301
That's Thomas Ligotti, not me.

>> No.15069219

>>15066612
this trolley is going up your ass

>> No.15069224

>>15066612
stfu fbi nigger

>> No.15069918

MORE TROLEY PROBLEMS
I'M ADDICTED
POST MOAR

>> No.15069935
File: 93 KB, 247x251, fight.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15069935

I ever find the nigger that turned off my trolly because my retarded step son was down there

>> No.15070131
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15070131

>> No.15070132
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15070132

>> No.15070138
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15070138

>> No.15070177
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15070177

>> No.15070180
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15070180

>> No.15070207

>>15070138
>>15070180
Fuck I actually have some tears forming, excellent

>> No.15070214
File: 72 KB, 960x421, c952ba61.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15070214

>>15070207
have some more

>> No.15070223
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15070223

>>15070207

>> No.15070241
File: 40 KB, 645x429, 1574436643023.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15070241

>> No.15070288

Short the trolley company and mess with your lever to figure out how to make it look like you pulled it but it didn't work.

>> No.15070305

>>15066612
Trolleylets, when will they learn?

>> No.15070313

>>15066612
I live in Lisbon, trolleys are part of my daily routine.

>> No.15070389
File: 278 KB, 743x635, 1490156513017.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15070389

>> No.15070699
File: 83 KB, 500x712, trolley.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15070699

You knew it was coming, I knew it was coming, here it is, come to reap the sinners.

>> No.15070896

>>15066612
Despite all the people responding, you wrote the truth for the majority of people reading it.

>> No.15070907

>>15068365
This one got me desu.

>> No.15070925

>>15068088
>does not intend to pull the lever
>statement is false
>pulls the lever
>statement is now true
>doesn't pull the lever, but it doesn't matter because the track is already aligned towards him

>> No.15070929

>>15066872

Good luck proving that shit lmao. I've worked with corporate economics studying supernormal profits and corporate law and the amount of times you can actually prove insider trader is laughable compared to how much it happens from an empirical perspective

>> No.15070934

>>15068365
Push and die of a heart attack and fall onto the 5 people while also derailing the trolley and killing anyone riding.

>> No.15071006

>>15068097
Its on a track

>> No.15071044
File: 129 KB, 393x469, 1524494178701.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
15071044

>>15067506
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chris_Collins_(American_politician)

>> No.15071803

>>15068351
based

>> No.15071986

>>15069105
There is an underground trolley that goes to the surface in West Philly

>> No.15072009

>>15071044
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2020_Congressional_insider_trading_scandal

>> No.15072023

>>15071986
It's like in West Philadelphia it's born and raised.

>> No.15072057
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15072057

>>15068157
>>15069110
I like that story because beneath it's surface it is actually a critique of the uncaring elite that have gutted the nation of it's infrastructure and industry, turned it into a "service economy" of ridiculous theme park crap, and then siphoned off the remaining wealth. The ending basically spelling out that the people who run the world are heartless nihilistic psychopaths.

>> No.15072104

>>15070389
literally the only interesting one itt

>> No.15073123

>>15066791
Fishtown homos