/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.14077397]

Write what's on your mind

[Anonymous No.14077412]

Use this gospel for protection
It'sa hard road to Heaven
We call on Your blessings
In the Father, we put our faith
King of the kingdom
Our demons are tremblin'
Holy angels defendin'
In the Father, we put our faith
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8yQVcGkbpAc

[Anonymous No.14077415]

>>14077397
It is wrong to lust after little girls. But loving them is perfectly fine. A lot of our problems would be fixed if younger teens were married. But that wouldn’t appease the capitalists and the whores

[Anonymous No.14077428]

I thought yesterday I would finally talk to her. I decided to work on a Monday because I knew she’d be there too. I came in at 9:30 and a coworker who just returned from his honeymoon struck up a conversation with me. He went on about his trip to Sicily. She rounded the corner and made for the kitchen as he talked about how they don’t make chicken parmigiana there, only vegetable. I nodded politely and hoped he would stop. I leaned towards the kitchen and my soul pleaded for him to shut up, even mid-sentence. But he continued. When he finished she was done using the sink and was heading back to her office. I passed her on the way to my desk and I felt an expectant glance, as if we’d had an appointment at the sink and I’d missed it. But I mutely continued to my desk. I thought maybe she’d be back at lunch time, but she atypically didn’t stop by. I thought she’d likely leave around 5:30, so stuck by my desk so I could at least watch her go but she didn’t appear. I went to the bathroom and as I was washing my hands I heard a thud. The sound of the door leading to the elevator bank closing. I dried my hands and walked past the bank of elevators and looked through the glass door. She was there and our eyes met and I walked on.

[Anonymous No.14077541]

Why i had to be born as such a genetic fuckup? Tons of neurotism, stutterer, having no idea what to do with life aka no impulses from within.

[Anonymous No.14077580]

>>14077412
>late Kanye
that's just the sound of a turn signal with auto-tune

[Anonymous No.14077586]

>>14077428
why are you like this?

[Anonymous No.14077601]

>>14077580
which Kanye is good Kanye?

[Anonymous No.14077646]

>>14077601
>early Kanye
Early mixes and the college trilogy redefined hip hop. this was best Kanye.
>mid work corpus
808 and heartbreak and collabs were really experimental and worked out fine sometimes but rather by accident. this is okay or fan-service Kanye
>late Kanye
still talented but completely outta his mind "everything I do is so dope I can make hated stuff popular"-attitude. literally called himself Yeezus. this is sub-par Kanye.

[Anonymous No.14077648]

>>14077586
Give me a break, I’m a child of divorce.

[Anonymous No.14077651]

>>14077601
>>14077646
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pPh9nNMkW48

[Anonymous No.14077663]

scored this 1982 Divine Comedy for 300 rub (5$) today, interior is great and nothing like a pocket paperback i had on the shelf

[Anonymous No.14077664]

>>14077646
>Early mixes and the college trilogy redefined hip hop. this was best Kanye.
college dropout, registration and orchestration.

[Anonymous No.14077669]

>>14077663
look at this shit

[Anonymous No.14077673]

My son is putting on his shoes. Come on, Timmy, Let’s Go to the Super Market. I will go to the Super Market and buy Groceries. I will buy food to feed my family. My Son, My Husband; My Self. I will feed myself with Oreo’s. I’m buying Oreo’s to feed my son Timmy and to motivate him to come with me. Timmy stops putting on his shoes, and while utilizes my absentmindedness to run back up the stairs, shouting like a savage. He’s daydreaming about being a savage warrior fighting against Wolves that he saw on the television screen, who were wandering through the snow, and were announced to be efficient and calculating hunters of the weak. And he had seen the movies of men in leatherwear wielding swords, fighting against monsters. A dark alley in the woods, and Timmy and his sword, imitating the movie stars, who scream before they engage for a presumably final battle. I listen to Timmy and shake my head and I whisper: Boys will be Boys, and chuckle to myself, while thinking of his father, who I have known for 21 years. TIMMY I scream now, as to make him realize that his mother means serious business and then runs back down the stairs and puts on his shoes and accompanies me to the super market, where he will be rewarded with Oreo’s for loving his mother and accompanying her.
I condition him like this. I realized early in my motherhood that human children, like all animals, are conditioned through treats, and the treats a mother gives, make her child love his mother - all kind of treats, all motherly treats, not just consumption goods in the super market, but also the tender and caring love of a mother, which then, again, often consists in giving her son Oreo’s as a reward but also mean to caress his hair, or pet his arm, or give him a kiss after dinner. I think it’s arrogant to presume that conditioning children or men or humans in general through treats is cynical or dehumanizing, that calling it cynical or dehumanizing is itself, dehumanizing, cynical, degrading of something that I, the conditioner, do not in any way perceive as lowly, degrading, cynical or dehumanizing, but rather as a central pillar of being an organic species on planet earth, something deserving of being ritualized, of being elevated and regarded highly. Conditioning is important, it is just a more pragmatic term than educating, and as such more fitting. I don’t educate my children to love and obey me, I don’t educate them on how to behave, rather I condition them. I utilize a wide array of tools to condition my children to be decent, loving and respectful human creatures.
No mother could judge me, unless of course she’s ideologically compromised, but if her eyes see clearly, if her soul is one of clarity and truth, she will know the animalism of mankind, the heightened, yet so wonderfully innocent animalism of our species. She is taught by her children, she is taught by her husband, what wisdom means.

[Anonymous No.14077679]

She will not laugh at the moon, and she will not kill the buddha. She is settled within the reality of human society. This is the truth that having a family has taught me, I see this wisdom, this settlement in all mothers surrounding me, even if they are not aware, even if they are ideologically compromised. Of this I am assured, yet, nonetheless, my studies of philosophy, during my time as a student, have taught me the value of humbleness.
I recognize, even though if I often struggle to internalize it, that the world does not just consists of the earthly, motherly reality, but that the dreams of my child, the laughter of the monk at the moon, and the irrational plunges into the unknown that my husband undertakes as his day-to-day job, have as much integrity and substance as the earthly realm over which I watch with knowing eyes. There is a flaw of absoluteness in the judgement of the mother, a certain limitation to the horizon, which is, of course, natural, as all deep knowledge and wisdom must be dense and focused, and as such excludes knowledge of other fields and spheres. What is interesting about this, is both the visibility of this limitation, and the almost subconscious knowledge of all man, that what is contained within this limited space is the deepest wisdom of all life.
I am generalizing, but my experience has so far only confirmed me. And even if this generalization is misplaced, and speaks more of my own soul, I have still revealed a secret of existence to myself.
I neither first nor last, but the beautiful spirit of being a mother, of seeing man and woman and child as they are in their most primordial shape and form, in their most primordial longing and needs, has beautified my life.

[Anonymous No.14077691]

>>14077646
>>14077651
>>14077646
>>14077601
Every Kanye has been a good. Some redefine the genre others just cement certain sounds. I love JIK, but it's not his best album. Still, it is a sincere message and remains as powerful as Jesus Walks - the album is important in his meta-narrative. Hes moving away from the hedonsim that defined his previous eras as he grasped with the loss of his mother.

The live show is powerful. I think it counters the narrative that his is just another act like he did with Trump.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aApd48DEjmQ

Truthfully... Only One remains his most powerful song. I too lost my mother some years ago so this just completely resonates with me.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZmYdIykD5g8

[Anonymous No.14077698]

>>14077669
Wow! I'm jealous.

[Anonymous No.14077742]

>>14077698
too bad most english books they have are either high school reading or irrelevant pulp fiction, the selection of dirt poor soviet editions is massive though

[Anonymous No.14077750]

>>14077397
Fell out of love with reading after graduating. Does nothing for me now. Personal edification a shit. Wrestling with recurring feelings of extreme jealousy and possessiveness, trying not to let them ruin parts of my life. Trying to get my shit together but nothing ever changes. Impotent, scared.

Really hating this incarnation bros

[Anonymous No.14077765]

>>14077742
meant to say dirt cheap, to be fair those books were printed by millions of copies and their condition is surprising. reading was much more prevalent back then, modern publishers mostly print expensive shite with painfully white paper

[Anonymous No.14077786]

I'm so fucking angry that I want to cry.

[Anonymous No.14077797]

>>14077428
Shut the fuck up you fucking pussy, I'm getting enraged just from reading your stupid posts, either just TALK to her you fuck or leave it you fucking faggot cunt, JEsus CHRIST

[Anonymous No.14077807]

>>14077786
I'm so fucking angry that I want to fight the whole world, but I know I can't win. Too bad I'm already in the fight. The winners are those who don't fight, and they don't fight because the world never attacked them

[Anonymous No.14077823]

>>14077786
Punch some couch pillows and drink red dry wine.

[Anonymous No.14077848]

I fucking love lolis

[Anonymous No.14077863]

>>14077848
unironically not-alive yourself

[Anonymous No.14077871]

>>14077397
I have an interview as a w*gecuck on Saturday. If I get the job, my life is over. If I don't get the job, I'll be too broke to do anything and effectively my life will be over. Either ways, I'm screwed. I wish I had a rich milf girlfriend who would fund my NEET lifestyle and encourage me to do nothing but read and write and have sex with her. A man could only wish.

[Anonymous No.14077876]

>>14077397
Local debate club is fucking ASS. I love debate, but cannot stand how pretentious and competitive this lot are, absolute piss motions on such abstract concepts as "This house regrets the rise of pop feminism" and other stupidly specialist economic concepts and such. Met some lovely people there, but between the shite motions and the fag that keeps trying to get into my pants, I'm just gonna chill at home with a bottle of vodka.

Also getting annoyed with my current study and considering switching, that's been on my mind a lot. Could probably just go to my psychiatrist and explain to them my flashes of conspiratorial ideas, would probably get locked up in the ward again for a cozy couple of weeks and get a proper chance to read in peace.

[Anonymous No.14077877]

>>14077807
Win by letting that shit go

[Anonymous No.14077879]

>>14077871
>I wish I had a rich milf girlfriend who would fund my NEET lifestyle and encourage me to do nothing but read and write and have sex with her.
Who the fuck doesn't

[Anonymous No.14077882]

My wife is my best friend. We have been together over a decade. I've spent just about every formative moment in my trek into maturity with her. Yet I lack something deep down inside. It is a feeling that I've ignored for too long with an idealized hope of marital redemption that just never sprung into fruition. Rather, everything is surface level words and giant extravagant actions that leave no more of anything real than the unbacked words themselves. On top of this I've fallen in love with another woman and we seem to have most of what I never had with my wife. It is so ridiculous because for 10 years I have actively ignored advances from attractive women and nipped close friendships in the bud before they grew into anything. Then I met this woman and she seemed to replace everything in my life instantly. I don't even trust this chick. I know she will hurt me over and over and in my head knowing this I still chose her. What is wrong with me. How do I tell me wife?

[Anonymous No.14077884]

>>14077871
if only you started drawing furry porn as a teen to be charging 150+$/pic a now. i knowa chick who lives in Ukraine in quite a luxury and her sole source of income is commision drawing, mostly furry porn

[Anonymous No.14077885]

>>14077877
Yeah. The epitome of "easier said than done"

[Anonymous No.14078442]

Cant' decide if living forever (or at least a very long time) would be terrible or amazing. On one hand you'd have time to hone your skills and knowledge to unimaginable degrees. On the other it would probably completely alienate you from society, incredibly moreso than whatever little angst you may be feeling now.

Also, could the human mind even handle living that long? Will it just unravel at some point?

[Anonymous No.14078461]

>>14077885
You WANT to be mad. You get something out of your anger, only your too stupid to see that it’s not doing you any good. So you blame (fill in the blank). I know it’s easier said than done, but once you get over yourself you will also be able to see that you’re the one to blame for how you react

[Anonymous No.14078504]

>>14078442
Living for way too long would doubtlessly cause insanity. And i think lifespan isn't the main issue, it's aging. If we got 50 years of youth instead of <30, life would be different.

[Anonymous No.14078516]

>>14078504
I'm assuming you'd cease aging or at least age drastically slower, right now people most people can't even make to 90 and remain fully lucid.

[Anonymous No.14078517]

>>14078461
>your too stupid to see that it’s not doing you any good
That's not true. Anger does me a lot of good. It's a great driving force

[Anonymous No.14078580]

>>14078516
some headlines like "people can live up to 130 years", "this country has many people over 100" don't make much sense to me, most people are senile and barely functioning after 70-80. life is just not that enjoyable unless you're in a small lucky percent who have good genetics. if we could stop aging past 50-60, it'd be perfect for a long lifespan

[Anonymous No.14078650]

If youre too dumb to be a man of the mind, just be a man of the heart lol. What's the big problem? If you don't think about things, the world becomes a manageable surface. It's not like you were ever able to penetrate it. Pure aesthetics. Surface level

[Anonymous No.14078670]

I don't want to be a writer, but I want to write well. I think I write fairly well, but not well enough. I'm with the first girl I've been with in years and she's very creative, extremely gifted as an artist. I've told her I like to write but despite her sharing many of her paintings I've not been able to even show her a short story yet. I don't care what anyone thinks of them but if I disappoint her with one I'd want to drive off a cliff. I've gone back and edited all of the short stories I've ever done but none click as good enough, so I've been racking my brain for a new idea, hoping something genius pops up, but nothing comes. If something did, I'd likely not be able to make it good enough anyways.

[Anonymous No.14079224]

>>14077879
Seriously this is THEDREAM.png, just think of all that extra time for lifting and reading, or whatever your hobby of choice is. I hate being an office-shackled oaf. If women want equality and to crush thier souls in an office in my place, then please go ahead.
Sadly I've yet to meet, yet alone date, a girl that's actually ok with the idea of a "house husband". Most don't even seem to relish the idea of being a stay at home mother, everyone wants that dual income household.
But what's my life experience worth, as just another fag on a mongolian motion picture forum?

[Anonymous No.14079261]

When I was in class I was explaining something and used the term "an individual" the facilitator (an African American woman) interrupted me to thank me for using that term. Why? what does it mean in this context? inb4 racism, just trying to find context

[Anonymous No.14079263]

>>14077882
Don't do it man, you're just horny for fresh pussy and propping up a fantasy in your head. You'll ruin a stable relationship with a woman that cares for you for a fling that'll likely leave you a husk of a man.
Unless you actively want to ruin your life, in which case, go get that fresh ass. You can tell me about the ensuing mental and emotional pain after your wife leaves you, and the new chick bounces to the next married schmuck she's trying to ruin.

[Anonymous No.14079268]

>>14078670
you should read the war of art. you may be letting your ego define you as a writer which inhibits you from free creativity

[Anonymous No.14079295]

and she had a fat ass and she had a fat neck

and you know that

the body is going

to be a bitch the same way the neck

will be a bitch

the fat ass bitch was

totally

gona lose, but the neck

was going to lose

because the body is going

to be a bitch the same way the neck

will be a bitch

and that's the way

the ass is going to lose

and that's the way

the ass is going to lose

and that's the way

the neck is going to lose

and that

sucks

but it's gonna have to because the ass is

getting

fatter

and more

fat

[Anonymous No.14079299]

the further away your bed is from a toilet, the freer you are. think about it.

[Anonymous No.14079322]

>>14079261
What were you talking about? Slavery, or some gender thing?
Reminds me of the time I accidentally won the respect of some stereotypical "SJW" students by asking for a guy's pronouns before talking to him. The only reason I did so was because I had a really bad hangover and legitimately couldn't tell whether he was a man or a lesbian.

[Anonymous No.14079334]

What's wrong with a dog who likes sex?

[Anonymous No.14079336]

>>14079224
I liked your initial phrasing better, that is, a rich milf paying for my life. "House husband" sounds repulsive

[Anonymous No.14079343]

The whole party was in a frenzy

The guy who got the gold ring was the guy who got the silver ring

The guys were like, "Man, man, man, man," but when I got there, he turned around, I felt like I was in another zone

But I was like, "Who is this one?"

"Who the fuck are you!?!"

I just walked in and it was like, "I am that guy,"

Everyone was like, this was no way to go

I just saw this guy just standing there, there was no sign of any effort

And I was like, who that guy is and I didn't even look him in the eye

And then I was like, "Fuck that," I walked behind this guy

I just told him that I was that fucking dude

[Anonymous No.14079344]

>>14077397
I always loved the item descriptions in Fromsoft games and want to do something smaller in my literature. I'm considering using footnotes for Dark Souls like exposition but I'm unsure how other readers treat footnotes.

[Anonymous No.14079351]

>>14079322
I don't remember it was a long time ago, but something about it jogged my memory.

this was accidental too. in high school my teacher taught us to use "one" instead of "you" and I came to like it and also incorporated "an individual" because it sounded cleaner to me when writing.

[Anonymous No.14079355]

Can someone take my acute psychosis away please, it's not funny anymore I'm just bored of it.

[Anonymous No.14079366]

Cease the insanity in my heart, if you would. I just do not care.

[Anonymous No.14079406]

>>14079355
what is it?

[Anonymous No.14079416]

One of the many reasons I never went to a therapy session is because the people involved weren't actually human beings.

[Anonymous No.14079418]

Things getting boring quickly is natures way of telling us to stay moving; and so is pain; and love. If there is one thing life cannot tolerate, it is stagnation. Stagnation ends in death. This might be another survival mechanism: stagnant life killing itself protects other life from infection.

[Anonymous No.14079438]

Pasta Men

[Anonymous No.14079442]

UUH I'M A SEX MACHINE

[Anonymous No.14079443]

>>14077871
>>14077879
>>14079224
You lot ever heard of Thomas Wolfe? He had an older mistress, 20 years older, who was married to a stockbroker.

[Anonymous No.14079447]

I'm addicted to fast food restaurants and I hate myself for it. it's not the food, it's just the atmosphere. I just love sitting there watching all these completely different people in completely different moments in their lives meet in such an anonymous environment. and the 24h ones, oh my god. one night I just sat there from 1 am to after 5 just wandering what incredible stories those strange faces hide at that time of night while writing my silly poems. you see the party kids, the drunks, the weirdos, the night shift workers, the junkies, all the filthiest and most beautiful humans gathered for a shitty greasy foreign food, you watch the night change and see the different meanings that time of night has for different people. if I didn't despise fast food chains so much I'd spend every penny I have in those disgustingly beautiful places

[Anonymous No.14079451]

>>14079447
Just buy a coffee and sit there.

[Anonymous No.14079452]

>>14077415
Based and lolita pilled

[Anonymous No.14079460]

>>14079451
ye that's exactly what I do

[Anonymous No.14079470]

I'm so lonely that I feel it in my joints. Not even my parents want anything to do with me anymore.

[Anonymous No.14079484]

>>14079447
seek help tom

[Anonymous No.14079486]

>>14079406
People can read my mind
They all hate me and want me dead.
Sometimes they're demons condemning me to hell.
Basically any time I think of someone I can feel their face behind mine and I think they're reading my mind or inserting thoughts into my head.

[Anonymous No.14079512]

>>14079486
But you seem entirely self aware about it, so is it like extremely intrusive thoughts?

[Anonymous No.14079521]

>>14079470
I feel this.
I was dumped by my last remaining friend for being “too mentally ill, depression and damaged” and they claim they can’t stand to be around me/lost all interest because I have too much shit going on and that I’m fucked in the head.
I have no one else, no family, and nothing in this world. Probably should blow my brains out.

[Anonymous No.14079545]

>>14077882
It's nice to be mired by someone new. And new love is titillating. But play it forward a few months. At best, you'll be in the same mundane routine, just with a different cunt. Divorce doesn't cure your problems, just replaces them with a new set.
Use your newly grown balls to not give a fuck with your wife and take her old claptrap to poundtown...or whatever it is you've been too scared to do bc you were afraid of her reaction. She'll love you for it.

[Anonymous No.14079557]

>>14079521
>Probably should blow my brains out
don't

[Anonymous No.14079563]

>>14079512
Yeah full blown psychosis (believing the delusions) was a year ago. Now Im just getting the intrusive thoughts that I dont believe but are still fucking annoying.
They make me nervous in public since my mind is on the thoughts and trying to present myself as a normal human being all the time (which isnt the thought pattern). Just want to be fully present in the moment without a bullshit simulator going through my head.

[Anonymous No.14079703]

>tfw just loaded up coomhub and COOMed all over the place after tell myself I was done
>tfw immediate regret
>tfw didn't even feel that good
how do I stop?

[Anonymous No.14079882]

>>14079344
I write random thoughts in a word document from time to time and I have one exactly on this. Sometimes they're phrased incredibly beautifully. My favorite is
>"A strange doll in a strange dress.
>There once was an abomination who had no place in this world. She clutched this doll tightly, and eventually was drawn into a cold and lonely painted world.”
there's a real elegance to that phrasing, especially in how it withholds so much information and leaves you wondering about all sorts of details. It reminds me of a line from Essays in Idleness by Kenkō, I think the similarities are pretty apparent.
>“A lady who had reason to withdraw from the world for a time had retired to a lonely tumbledown house, where she was idling away the long days of her seclusion”

[Anonymous No.14079895]

>>14079703
watch this video whenever you want to coom:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmBhQtB5nM0&has_verified=1

[Anonymous No.14079929]

>>14077428
this is a heartbreaking story

[Anonymous No.14080076]

What does liking Garcia Marquez and Vargas Llosa say about a girl?

[Anonymous No.14080089]

Stareterror Eyes boulder upturned Fields
Up and downwards
Downwards up
Surging
Sun
Stone-esqued Sun
And
De-surged

***

Sticks pray cross Arms
Letters hesitated pale Unknown
Flowers naughted
Dusts shyed
Shimmer
Tearinged
Glassed
Forgotten

***

The Heavens hanged
Shadows catch Clouds
Fears
Hopping
Ducking
Stretching
Digging digging
Tired
Blunt
Ruffled
The
Runaway
Grave

***

Women march along yearnshallow Eyes
Children's Laughter tradesing pained Blood
Distances nod
Blossoms wave
Come collect wind
Suffocate strangle damp the tear Maw

[Anonymous No.14080202]

I just want to be in a monogamous loving relationship with a pretty girl who strengthens me and who is strengthened by me in return. I have never experienced anything of the sort.

I am a virgin, and I have an aversion or aloofness toward emotional and physical intimacy and I don't know where to develop these aspects of myself except in manipulative or destructive relationships which I am hesitant to engage in.

I am afraid of letting women in at bottom, for fear of what they will do to someone vulnerable like me, but I am also afraid of using women, and emotionally abusing them.

[Anonymous No.14080215]

>>14080076
that she should be my based brown gf :)

[Anonymous No.14080327]

>>14079929
no it isn't, he posts about it every day. she's just a co-worker he can't muster up the courage to talk to, so he just stares at her

[Anonymous No.14080338]

>>14080076
that she cute

[Anonymous No.14080464]

already dreading the christmas / new year and having to chose between "celebrating" with my family or going to hang out with my "friends" from high school that I haven't seen in over a year. I wish I could have a nice comfy get together with my dear friends like in my chinese cartoons.

[Anonymous No.14080483]

ever think about how much time is wasted in public schooling?
Where I am now, I could have been there four years ago had my time not been sucked out by this system

[Anonymous No.14080497]

>>14077397
Fekk

[Anonymous No.14080498]

>>14080483
I'm a /math/guy and I fucking hate thinking about how much further I could be right now. People like Tao were taking calculus when they were 10, and while that may be going too far it would have been tremendously beneficial if I had been taught about proofs and logic and basic discrete maths in 8th grade instead of fucking geometry. It's not even safe at the university level, at least in burgerland, I had to skip the entire first and part of the second year curriculum just to get into proof-based classes. Madness.

[Anonymous No.14080532]

I'm very thankful for these threads. It's nice to vent or just get my weird thoughts out into the open.

It's mid fall here and very depressing. There is something about this season that always makes me feel lonely; magnificent desolation. Maybe it's the darkness. One of the main struggles of my life is possibly being close to resolving: I have an appointment with a gender therapist this weekend, I'm very anxious about it. I've had obsessive thoughts about my gender my whole life and am now going to expose and reveal my most inward self to some strange therapist to get his professional opinion. I don't like being this vulnerable, but I am forcing myself to. I'm not hopeful about the results, but at least I'll get some manner of closure.

I went on a dusk horse wagon ride last night. Very cold. I saw too baby calf's on the ride, they were adorable. Cows are an underrated cute animals in my opinion. (Picrel)

[Anonymous No.14080546]

>>14077663
That looks gorgeous

[Anonymous No.14080597]

>>14080532
>I have an appointment with a gender therapist this weekend, I'm very anxious about it. I've had obsessive thoughts about my gender my whole life and am now going to expose and reveal my most inward self to some strange therapist to get his professional opinion.
aww jeez man dont do it just be a gayboy or lesbian please please dont do it please dont do it just cross dress dont start carving your flesh up on some new and untested science please you write beautifully dont be a labrat just be gay why cant you just be gay

[Anonymous No.14080613]

I'm about to go bed, it's late here, I am going to sleep with a loaded mind and I'm going to mentally ejaculate all over my inner life in dreams.

[Anonymous No.14080616]

>>14080532
that picture is simultaneously comfy yet strange once you see the girls

[Anonymous No.14080627]

Fuck, I've got wake up early to get out the way of the maintenance guys coming in the morning. I could just sleep through it but somehow it feels weird and I'm too lazy to be there to make small talk for the 15 minutes.

[Anonymous No.14080629]

>>14080597
Kek, I'm an autogynephilic dysphoric natal male. I'm basically a straight man. I have absolutely no expectations of ever socially transitioning or passing. At most I'll do HRT for a bit and play it by ear, I've heard it gives dysphoric people a lot of mental benefits.

>>14080616
What about them?

[Anonymous No.14080652]

>>14080327
She isn’t really a co-worker. We happen to work on the same floor for different companies. I try to emphasize that what appears meaningful to me in her actions is really just innocuous behavior, that she is unaware of me. I am aware that I am an insect. I just haven’t shaken the human need for connection. Once that’s gone I’ll die on the windowsill.

[Anonymous No.14080656]

I heard anti-depressants killed your sex drive but mine remains intact. I have, however, more or less completely lost the ability to ejaculate.
I never really tied my ability to cum on command as being a part of my identity as man but now that it's gone I see that I was wrong. I feel a little shallow, feel like I should have ascended past that. But mostly i feel blue balled.

[Anonymous No.14080669]

I fucked up my LSAT test and scored a 146. I am so embarrassed. I told my dad so he would hold me accountable. I am really an idiot for not studying. I feel like a worthless idiot I can't believe I've made it this far. I quit my job to study for this test and all I did was dick around like a retard. Jesus Christ

[Anonymous No.14080680]

It was a fruitful exercise, even if its biggest take away was just how tremulous my memory truly is. I'm quite concerned how weak my connection to my own history has become. Beyond that, it felt like some overdue accounting. It took me a couple days to remember when the last one was. The irony is that it was not even my own memory at all that gave me the first answer, but a story I was told by my friend, who had seen me (blackout drunk) talking to a girl in the backyard of a house party I had not been invited to. Even funnier than that is the fact I was so drunk I probably couldn't even tell she was a girl- she would have been just a vague humanoid shape by that time of night. I wasn't sure if it counted. But I think I have the dates settled.
I am 23 years old. Excluding family members, service workers and the girlfriends of my friends, I have not spoken to a girl my own age in 11 months, when Michael's girlfriend brought a friend (female) to Jason's pre-drink. She asked me what I studied while we both waited to use the bathroom which was occupied by Jason doing coke.
If the house party backyard incident counts, then it has been 7 months.

[Anonymous No.14080684]

i'm starting to understand Land.

[Anonymous No.14080758]

>>14080629
The one on the right is weird because the photo cuts off right at her lip, generally crops at "moving parts" of the body look off. The left one just looks weird because of the timing of the shot, her expression reads both as cheerful and something else I can't quite place (mild annoyance perhaps).

[Anonymous No.14080762]

>>14080669
It's a sign, stop falling for the law meme

[Anonymous No.14080847]

I feel like taking up Rocket League or SCII again, but I recognize it's just a waste of time and I'll feel bad afterwards.

[Anonymous No.14080857]

I'm in a state of restlessness for the next big event in my life, and I'm occupying myself with silly tasks to pass my time and not worry as much. I've graduated, but I haven't gotten a job as I wanted to. Of course, my health had to disrupt it all. I hate the limits of my physical body. I'm tired.

[Anonymous No.14081019]

I fucking despise the elderly. Complete parasites, everyone of them. Maybe in the past, older people could offer wisdom and advice, but now everything moves do fast that they have nothing to offer anymore. They just get in the way and run off their arrogant mouths. Fuck them. I hope they all die in septic retirement homes under the glare of florescent lamps, hearing voices from a foreign land. They are all hedonists and cowards, fuck them. They destroyed our planet and our cultures. FUCK THEM. And all they have to offer in return is snark and minion memes. Day of the pillow when?

[Anonymous No.14081057]

>>14081019
>picture
I can't stop thinking about that nyt article. boomer hatred is going mainstream.

[Anonymous No.14081174]

>>14080532
This looks like where I grew up in Indiana. Your gender is probably confused by all the basedbeans growing around you. You're gonna be alright without cutting up your body, anon.

[Anonymous No.14081211]

>>14077601
The Yeezus Kanye, when he went full experimental

[Anonymous No.14081243]

>>14077601
Early Kanye. I hate his stupid religious shit . Like through the wire Kanye , back when he had some connection to the streets

[Anonymous No.14081244]

I was reading the Gospel of Mark earlier and the lines
>and he was as one dead; insomuch that many said, He is dead
>27 But Jesus took him by the hand, and lifted him up; and he arose.
struck me to the point that I teared up and could not stop for about an hour.

[Anonymous No.14081258]

>>14077397
Tropical storms uproot the palms, ending their sway!

[Anonymous No.14081269]

I love metal. Sometimes you just have to bite someone's face off. Crush weak. Beat your enemies into submission .Drink blood .

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://m.youtube.com/watch%3Fv%3DnFQhlpB6N2A&ved=2ahUKEwiO3_eI_MLlAhWQiOAKHSepD28Qo7QBMAB6BAgAEAI&usg=AOvVaw09HLq2i7MKFg5UYw8dcPB5

[Anonymous No.14081270]

The Dnepropetrovsk Maniacs were fucking heroes that did what they did because they NEEDED to. It benefited them and was the optimal path of Objectivist philosophy. Eyes and fetuses cut right our of people with not one trace of regret in the world. That is how a true Randian hero lives.

[Anonymous No.14081285]

Today, on the break between classes, a qt classmate sat by my side and started some small talk. After a while, she said it was really hot and that she could drink a beer. "Me too", I said, with no money on my pockets. Then she said "let's drink? Now?" I said to her that I didn't have any money and she said "don't worry" and we got up and went to buy some beer at the bar next to the Uni. On our way, a friend of hers saw us and we all went to the bar togheter. We drank our beer really fast and went back to class, where she was smilling and letting her stuff fall on the floor everytime I looked at her. She has such a beautiful smile and I have a crush on her since the day I saw her for the first time. The thing is: she has a boyfriend, but he lives in another city and they only see eachother on the weekneds. I looked up his profile on FB and he looked like such a dork lol. Anyway, I know this probably means nothing, but I can't stop thinking she was interested in me and that if that girl didn't followed us maybe something could have happened? Idk. I'm going to ask her to go drink some beer with me tomorrow again.

[Anonymous No.14081286]

"That which is good for me is right." - Ayn Rand

[Anonymous No.14081295]

>>14077415
True

[Anonymous No.14081326]

"Silence! I demand from you, divine creatures, from high to low, offspring of Heimdal. Allfather, you want me to tell all about the oldest stories of our ancient past."

I've been thinking a lot about this piece of text lately. I tried to break it down into little bits and pieces, and so far, I've started to analyse the first sentence, which is really the "Silence!" part. This part is very significant. It tells us to stop everything that we're currently doing and start listening to this text. Furthermore, the fact that this is shouted is also very significant. It informs us about the noise that our lives are engulfed in. This text is a sort of hinge that all the following hangs on. It signifies a break with the past, and is therefore also of great spiritual significance. It forces the reader to silence his inner noise as well as his outer noise, to fully commit himself to this text, which is the first and foremost meaning of this first line. I hope to extract more meanings from this first line, as I feel that this text is teeming with spiritual significance

[Anonymous No.14081518]

>write and polish over 7000 word section of essay
>send it to supervisor
>"this is good stuff anon, but can you condense it into 1000 words?"
haha, sure thing prof

[Anonymous No.14081540]

>>14081518
I wish I was your professor. I would give you a 0 just for the fun of it. I am so done with humanity.

[Anonymous No.14081543]

Night hours always gave me a feeling of surrealism, whether I was in nature or in the city.

[Anonymous No.14081550]

What is the inner phenomenological content of aging? I often try to remember how I felt when I was younger. It's at times a futile exercise because visceral memory is quite lacking--we can only clearly remember the abstract outlines of the past. I remember times of power or times of great sadness, and everything in between. What I remember distinctly however is the *potency* of these sensations. Also their abundance--as I get older my emotionally heightened episodes seem to be more and more spaced out, divided and cooled by expanses of reason. Youth is marked by an intensity of sensation, in some part dictated by the novelty of it. There's more too it however, as the machinery of youthful physiology functions with a greater level of acuteness. This can be maintained to some degree by diet and exercise and lack of overt trauma to the system, but it's inevitable that it will change eventually.

What I miss most about my younger self despite his possession of flaws I have since rid myself of is his exploratory nature. The very thing I have attempted to subdue, willfulness, to subordinate to adult rationality, is the one thing I am harmed for lacking. And exactly what my youth was lacking was the opposite, cool headed reason.
Reading and studying did nothing to teach me it; I could perceive it intellectually but not experience it. Understandably, my frontal lobes were not yet completed.
The one thing I have lost from getting older is not the changes in my body or appearance, or anything of the sort. It's the loss of a love for the world. There's a term Weltschmerz, for the perception or sympathy with the pain of the world, but there is no corresponding Weltliebe. However that was something like what I had when I was at my cutest and most idealistic. It was essentially curiosity, and while I'm still curious, it has been honed into a practical edge rather than wide-ranging and limitless.

I want to know if these traits we display at different times in life are contingent to that state of maturation or not. For instance the so called critical period for learning a language in childhood. Is this pattern of activity strictly impossible for adults, or is it just dormant or inhibited?

[Anonymous No.14081581]

Just finished the very rough first pass at a short story. Feels good to complete something even if needs a ton of work yet. I'm also very happy to have got into a mode of writing regularly. I was very disillusioned with the whole thing for a while, but eventually I realized I was really just sick of forcing myself to write "literary" stories instead of just writing what I wanted. I also feel a lot better mentally going to bed each day having created something, even if it's just 500 more words that will probably never be read.

Good night and sweet dreams /lit/ <3

[Anonymous No.14081604]

The rate of neurogenesis is accelerated in youth. This manifests itself in two factors: learnability (the ability to pick new skills up quickly) but also instability. For instance the activation of the endocrine system in puberty is in large part to accelerate the growth and development of brain structures in addiction to the activation of secondary sex characteristics.

There is a phenomenological inner content to this experience of neural growth, which we experience as the fluidity and dynamism of youth. However the defect in this process is that it implies a lack of a solidified operating mechanism, it is inherently chaotic and error-prone. The trade of nomative adult brain function is the accumulation of experience in part by being exposed to these less than fatal errors.

We have barely any knowledge about how to constructively boost neurogenesis in the adult brain. Indeed, the main function of neurogenesis is the construct the mature brain. It is certain that genetically these particular steps only run once in a lifetime.

But if were possible to fake it, or engineer it otherwise, so that we could stimulate growth in the linguistic centers to accelerate learning a new language or whatever that would change human life forever. If we could correct our defects by targeted nano-electrostimulation, or by activation of hormones, or any other means, then we'd be facing the prospect of designer selves. But then what would become of what differentiates us?

[Anonymous No.14081641]

Neuro-prosthetics are in an early state. Despite the establishment of proof of concept the state of the art is far removed from an implementation that can program the brain. Everything that makes up a person's mind is ultimately embodied in a distinct structure of connectivity of various brain parts, on the most detailed level the synapses.

We normally develop these connections either through genetics or by experience, but what if were possible to operate on them directly using technology? The idea of being able to control the synapse connections to produce a given result is inconceivable given today's level of technology. It would require extraordinarily advanced nanotechnology at the least. All we can do is crudely influence the larger, relatively more straightforward neurons to fire or not fire. How could it then ever be possible to encode knowledge or other traits into the brain mechanically?

I could imagine some kind of futuristic programming language for brain states, but even if we had the software programmable, actually operating on the hardware to instantiate it would not be easy.
The brain itself is a stochastic system, it's firing batters are not strictly regular, repeatable, or predictable. Therefore it does not function like any other programmable computer.

[Anonymous No.14081676]

>>14081641
This just leads me to believe that who we become in life is ultimately up to chance. Even given the same inputs over again, the brain would behave at least slightly or even very differently. In fact, the complete response profile of the entire brain at that moment would never end in the same result twice. At that moment an uncertainty principle was active, that made certain synaptic behaviors adjust in a unique way. All these trillions of connections can't be coaxed into the same state again. There is just too much complexity for there to be strictly deterministic (exactly repeatable and predictable) outputs.

[Anonymous No.14081919]

I'm interested in reading about theology and philosophy, and don't know where to start. So many posts on here are from really smart dudes, and I can't help but feel left behind. And call it affirmation, but I feel that a lot of the philosophers that get touted around here are hopelessly depressing, and the people that tout them are often condescending. Just young and lost like millions of others.

[Anonymous No.14081923]

>>14081919

Which theology?

[Anonymous No.14081929]

>>14081923
I guess I should start with western stuff, although zen buddhism has parts that interest me. Jung is my jumping off point, if that helps at all.

[Anonymous No.14081946]

I wish I had a boyfriend who I could fuck into a sweaty, sticky, quivering mess, and then read books with afterwards.

[Anonymous No.14081953]

Turning against the tides of time, I feel the most resistance late at night
It is in these nights that I conjure up a whimsical fantasy narrative
To wonder and wonder what would love is for motive
Awake and sober just born to ponder a breath of air in this December
For this snow-backed story, when the tide is especially high and punishingly cold
I dreamt of her and I in a day better than old.

[Anonymous No.14081956]

>>14081946
He will find you. Maybe not in the amount of time that you'd like, but he'll find his way, if you keep looking.

[Anonymous No.14081980]

I just had a sex fantasy where I killed Abbado. It was like in a Serbian film where he takes the machete and slices that woman's head off while butt fucking her.

[Anonymous No.14082001]

>>14081956
Is he you?

[Anonymous No.14082019]

>>14082001
That'd be convenient, wouldn't it? Probably not.

[Anonymous No.14082042]

None o' that gay nostalgic "muh 90s" faggy fuckboi shit, that's for sure.

[Anonymous No.14082046]

>>14082019
That's a shame.I bet you'd like it.

[Anonymous No.14082076]

>>14081540
What's wrong Anon? What made you hate humanity?

[Anonymous No.14082108]

I went to bed 2AM and now that I picked up my phone, I realized I spent two hours (it is past 4 in my time zone) thinking about interacting with my coworkers in a confident manner, telling jokes and making witty remarks and all that. I’m fucking pathetic. Need to sleep for real now.

[Anonymous No.14082146]

Realizing recently, or more so remembering I guess, that I'm worthy and deserving of romance and love. I've been self-flagellating myself for so long for some past missteps I made in the game of love, like I'm still the same person I was a couple years ago. I never even really wronged anyone who loved me. Took what didn't belong to me, sure, but never hurt those I stole. Feeling like I can open my door for someone again. been talking to a cute girl, she'll be at a party this weekend. Think I might give her the opportunity to eat my heart.

[Anonymous No.14082150]

i'm going to post this and not look at the replies there won't be any

[Anonymous No.14082153]

>>14082150
haha jokes on you, fucking dumb gay asshole

[Anonymous No.14082418]

>>14082076
Everyone always insults and harasses and mistreats me and it gets to be a lot. I am truly a selfless, devout hero deep down but people just keep antagonizing me and harassing me.

[Anonymous No.14082425]

>>14077397
Taco bell. Das it. What is this for? Noooo. I dont want to. I had scary thoughts a minute ago. Taco bell.

[Anonymous No.14082575]

>>14082418
>truly a selfless, devout hero deep down but people just keep antagonizing me and harassing me
Have you read The Idiot by Dosto?

[Anonymous No.14082581]

>>14077397
I want to suck Mariah Carey's cock.

[Anonymous No.14082612]

I haaate working with corpora data. I'm supposed to be watching these handy videos on it when I would much rather read a text informing me of how to work with stuff. I hate taking my laptop outside and work in front of people. I'm paranoid they'll find the other stuff I have on here. I don't wanna bring my personal out into the open like that.

[Anonymous No.14082615]

>>14081543
at night, when most are asleep and unseen, i truly feel like i belong to this world. just me and the utter beauty of being.

[Anonymous No.14082622]

I want to become a doomsayer for the great old ones and the outer gods.

[Anonymous No.14082699]

>>14082612
then get a separate work laptop

[Anonymous No.14082781]

>>14082418
Why are they harassing and mistreating you? is it completely unprovoked?

[Anonymous No.14082804]

>>14082699
just create separate accounts or carry your personal data on a flash drive. i do this.

[Anonymous No.14082815]

i was gonna read

the road
the postman
java book
couple other books, i hope they don't suck

[Anonymous No.14082818]

>>14082615
yeah i think i like midnight to six too when everyone is asleep. you ride out and no ones out. shit on tv though

[Anonymous No.14082883]

>>14082699
>>14082804
>separate accounts
That's a great idea actually. I don't want to spend money on another device of which I already have one that works perfectly, just because of my autism. I'll create one right now instead of bunking off, thanks anon.

[Anonymous No.14082901]

>>14082818
who the fuck still watches tv? i quit it almost a decade ago and advice you do the same. every show is there on the internet to watch it whenever and however you want

[Anonymous No.14082937]

retail wagies will crawl on the ground and bark like a dog for 20 dollars an hour

[Anonymous No.14082981]

>>14082937
$20? Where do you live? It's minimum wage here, not $20.

[Anonymous No.14082992]

>>14082981
I live in a noble country of valued citizens, not America

[Anonymous No.14083110]

Everytime I think I hit rock bottom, I find out there is even more further below it. I feel like such a waste of a person, I've lost the will to live. No one cares about me as a person, only as a thing: a provider, an object to convert, a punching bag, a wageslave. I don't think I've ever truly felt loved or accepted as a person, and not just a slot to be filled. My parents say I need to devote my self to a cause bigger than myself, mainly their religion but I doubt that they are able to do that themselves and are just repeating a trite soundbite they've heard. They say that but then go and convince themselves that the entire universe and everything in it is basically like them, they look up into the night sky and see themselves reflected back. The cause greater than themselves is utterly concerned with them and their church friends in particular, the only reason God hasn't ended the world is for them and their 500 friends to be saved. It's utter narcissism, but they get to walk around smug and pitying everyone they meet.

I'm only 23 now but I feel ancient. Young love is out of my reach now, my body is disintegrating, everyone I know is passing me up and I just don't care. I'm not going to be able to achieve any of my goals, everything left is a consolation prize. And not even good ones at that.

I basically think about killing myself every day. I have a plan, all I need to do is execute it. I want to buy a gun just to have so I know that I can leave anytime I want. That probably won't be soon, but it isn't far away either. I hate my body and my face. Everything about it, I'm hyperconscious of it's every feature. I hate being who I am, and the role I was born into.

I wish I could free and soft, graceful and lithe. Beautiful. I wish I could love my body and want to take care of it. I wish I could love and loved in return, that people would miss me when I was away and look forward to seeing me. I wish I could matter

[Anonymous No.14083224]

A poem I have been working on in a .txt on my desktop:

>A murder mystery solved by a portly detective

Suggestive in their case,
does onedetermine, andfindalso,
symmetry breeding complacency?
Does, uh, does
complacency breeding symmetry
alsofindanddetermine one Doe's
case therein suggestive?

[Anonymous No.14083280]

What lubricates the engine of our modern capitalist society is hope. What we're witnessing now is the increasingly bleak outlook of younger generations. Wages are stagnate, the price of many common goods continues to increase, class mobility is joke in many modern cities. In Winston Salem, a town near me, no one has climned out of the lower income neighborhoods in almost twenty years. If you are born poor, you die poor, and so do your children. People are less likely to believe that they are a stone's throw away from becoming the man at the top than they were thirty years ago. They are having to wrestle with the idea that their children will not be better off than they are, if they can ever afford to stop working long enough to have any. This isn't sustainable, but what is? I'm not a fucking commie but what hope is there for change?

Why the fuck did I just read a job listing for a position that pays 29k a year that requires a bachelors and 2 years of working experience? Yo that's whack as shit.

[Anonymous No.14083285]

>>14083280
*stangant. *climbed I oughta proofread one of these days

[Anonymous No.14083309]

God, male humans are disgusting. I hate their voices and their giant balding heads, and their gross Adams apples. Bleggghhh

[Anonymous No.14083323]

>>14083110
Do you love and accept yourself for who you are?

[Anonymous No.14083346]

>>14083309
> not moving to the land of your daydreams, populated by full-bodies Venuses and eternally young ephebes, by going schizo
pleb. of course real life males are ugly.

[Anonymous No.14083435]

>>14077397
do you make your favorite quotes into manuscript pages?

[Anonymous No.14083444]

Sex is bad and cringe. Hand-holding and cuddling are the highest forms of intimacy.

[Anonymous No.14083446]

>>14083323
Not really

[Anonymous No.14083455]

Jesus fucking Christ just fuck off from my thoughts. I did not ask God to give me an another dream of you. The day, when I have finally drunk away all of my brain cells that produce any feelings, will be the happiest day. Until then, I guess I'll just stick to reading the Greeks.

[Anonymous No.14083458]

>>14083444
i unironically agree.
> mfw my clergy kink potentiated the repulsion i have for sex to the point of becoming completely platonic itself
they say one strives unconsciously to be like an object of his desire.

[Anonymous No.14083459]

>>14083455
>another dream of you
Satan?

[Anonymous No.14083467]

>>14083435
I have never thought of this - seems like a really comfy hobby

[Anonymous No.14083470]

>>14083285
proofread your corrections as well while you're at it lol

[Anonymous No.14083479]

>>14083467
for me, writing with a real feather is deeply calming, it scratches a bit and doesn't demand perfect accuracy like a traditional dip pen (at least i feel like a perfect metal nib calls for concentration and precision)

[Anonymous No.14083498]

I'm sad because i cant relate with any book protagonist. They seem all miles ahead of me.

[Anonymous No.14083511]

>>14083470
Christ, I should consider suicide.

[Anonymous No.14083825]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SO HOOOOOOOORNY...... AND SO LOOOOOOOOOOOOONELY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[Anonymous No.14083844]

>>14077397
I have a big dick

[Anonymous No.14083862]

>>14083479
Are you serious or just a pseud?

[Anonymous No.14083882]

>>14083862
nah i'm just into retrograde stuff. original "quote" is from a video and about 70% of it is swearings. i just like writing bad words the traditional way

[Anonymous No.14083921]

>>14082901
you think you're patrician, bitch? I never had a tv. one of the few things my parents did right

[Anonymous No.14083936]

>>14077397
Shit's fucked and it's my fault, the rest is combination of rambles and an spiral of screams of anger and frustration.

[Anonymous No.14083954]

>>14082901
exactly, why watch degenerate western "entertainment" when Japan exports thousands of hours of qt anime girls doing qt things every year?

[Anonymous No.14083984]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
-_-

[Anonymous No.14084028]

Why do I feel like studying psychology? it feels like a big dream but I have to get better grades and learn daily

[Anonymous No.14084039]

>>14084028
maybe you like to understand the reasoning behind ones actions?

[Anonymous No.14084045]

>>14077397
I really want to put heroin in my nose. But I don't think I should and I don't have any. Boy is it cold outside.

[Anonymous No.14084052]

[Anonymous No.14084060]

>>14084028
A lot of people who major in psychology think that it's going to help then solve their own individual neuroses. They are almost always sorely disappointed and indebted in the process

[Anonymous No.14084061]

>>14084052
based. anything that man said that wasn't in relation to set theory should be disregarded.

[Anonymous No.14084073]

Throughout my life every attempt at exploring my emotions and trying to come to terms with the turmoil in my heart only ends up worsening what was once perfect. The things I cherished are never the same once I open my stupid mouth.

[Anonymous No.14084091]

>>14084052
>>14084061
B-B-BUT MUH TEAPOT NOOOOOOOOOOOO

[Anonymous No.14084140]

Statistics is by far the ugliest branch of maths. Hypothesis testing is probably as gross as you can get with numbers.

[Anonymous No.14084179]

life isn't bad, but i wouldnt call it good either, time flows in a state where . nothing changes but everything moves around, boring conversations are told, an alarm rang, another cold bike ride, its weekend, i been waiting, oh wait, monday.

[Anonymous No.14084201]

>>14084140
Hypothesis testing is a waste of time. You simply can't verify anything because of the ad hoc ergo propter hoc fallacy. Life cannot be understood, and anyone who suggests otherwise is blinded by hubris.

[Anonymous No.14084258]

>>14084201
I can't verify your reasoning so I'm rejecting it

[Anonymous No.14084339]

I'm fucking tired of my "KV" status, my life is pretty good except for the relationship/sexual aspect which is literally 0. I'm tired of being an "incel" (what a now and beautiful buzzword) despite being friendly, decent looking, somewhat fit, cultured ecc ecc. I mean, I'm not a Greek God bu at the same time I'm not one of those ugly freaks who spend their days playing videogames. But these guys still get some pussy somewhat, while I don't

[Anonymous No.14084375]

>>14077415
cringy pedo poster

[Anonymous No.14084811]

How the hell do I act more professional at work? I work retail and I got some complaints about sarcastic banter and sounding aggressive (it's my tone and I will say it's hard to change). Do I just become a retail robot? I'm not good at faking things. My boss just texted me and go onto me.

[Anonymous No.14084876]

>>14084375
you still haven’t broken free from the conditioning, I see. I’ll be waiting for you

[Anonymous No.14084953]

Uggh, I'm feeling gross today

[Anonymous No.14084956]

Today a girl from the lab I work on was staring in my direction. I thought it was something behind me, but I was literally against a wall, alone. I don't pick this kind of stuff easily, but it was pretty obvious to me, so much that I'm thinking I'm in some kind of erotomania-like delusion. Man, I'm 23 but I still act like a dumb teenager when it comes to this kind of stuff. I know I will spend the rest of the week thinking about this shit.

[Anonymous No.14084960]

>>14084956
Go talk to her you dumb dumb.

[Anonymous No.14085018]

>>14077397
Not literature

[Anonymous No.14085033]

>>14084953
Like that greasy feel that won't go away no matter how much you shower or try to scrub it away?

[Anonymous No.14085074]

>>14082146
I like how you write, anon.

[Anonymous No.14085102]

>>14085033
Yeah

[Anonymous No.14085123]

asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep asleep and not waking up

[Anonymous No.14085387]

>>14077415
early & forced marriage is exactly how you get skyrocketing cuckolding rates.

[Anonymous No.14085419]

Thinking about the "folk song":

It's raining, it's pouring
The old man is snoring
He went to bed and bumped his head
And didn't get up in the morning

Wikipedia says the earliest version of this song, complete with the line about the old man's accident, came some time between 1914 and 1939 in the United States. Why does America need folklore like this? What impulse caused the song to be created? Songs about death, accidents, killings are always the blood of folklore. But here's a song where the death means nothing and is from nothing and for nothing. Death from sleeping. And such a mocking repetitive tune.

[Anonymous No.14085445]

My life fits into a suitcase. The room is cold. I couldn't be bothered to turn the heat on. I will be turning 28 soon. Being alone is difficult, but I am also a bit proud to have endured as much as I have.

[Anonymous No.14085467]

>>14077663
Very tacky binding. You have 0 taste

[Anonymous No.14085490]

Soon I'll have a juicer. Then I can make my own delicious fruit and vegetable juice instead of posting on this stupid website

[Anonymous No.14085513]

>>14085445
> My life fits into a suitcase.
so you're mobile and ascetic. i see. quick to come and go, no roots grown into your dwelling

[Anonymous No.14085522]

>>14085467
no pretentiousness on MY solemn soviet designs, nigga

[Anonymous No.14085535]

i will not live past 30

[Anonymous No.14085537]

AHHHHHHHHHH I was SO SURE we were going to have a recision given how long it's been since 2008 and the trade war retardation and brexit so I sold all my stocks, planning to reinvest after the crash but NO everyone's just continuing along like nothing's wrong and the federal reserve keeps hitting the stimulus button (we're going to be so fucked come the recession kek).

I just KNOW if I buy back in the crash will occur the next day too, fuck me.

[Anonymous No.14085542]

>>14085387
(And that's a good thing.)

[Anonymous No.14085572]

>>14085542
what 4d chess multitrack drifting kinda shit is this reply

[Anonymous No.14085608]

>>14085387
Never said it should be forced. Also, you’re underestimating the improved pair bonding between the virgin girl and the man compared to the whores today who have no significant connection to their husbands because they’ve already been with dozens of guys. Not only that, but you should already have had children soon, which would likely prevent her from being too free with her time to even consider such a thing.

[Anonymous No.14085619]

>>14085608
you're a pedo retard. go read decameron, a book from times when girls were married young and virgin, and see how "uncommon" adultery was.

[Anonymous No.14085630]

>>14085608
You know the rules for speaking about underage wives. First post your jaw with a timestap.

[Anonymous No.14085637]

>>14085513
No roots almost anywhere
Also fuck me I cant stand clicking these fucking traffic lights
t. Phone poster

[Anonymous No.14085723]

>>14085630
maybe facial recognition won’t screw me over when I apply for jobs

[Anonymous No.14085736]

>>14077397
Whenever I see her I think of killing myself. I see her laughing and talking with other people, with other men, and imagine blowing my brains out all across her waist. Spraying my flesh-blood unto her bosom. Her look of terror as my lifeless body falls forward unto the floor.

[Anonymous No.14085741]

>>14085608
The psychology going on here is incredible

[Anonymous No.14085753]

>>14085723
Screencapping this in case you ever decide to run for president.

[Anonymous No.14085758]

>>14085753
I won’t

[Anonymous No.14085766]

>>14085758
Screencapping this as well so you'll look like an indecisive candidate.

[Anonymous No.14086004]

I ask myself what people here who identify as christian think about pacifism. I think the Sermon on the Mount is pretty clear and hard to misinterpret: Don't ever do violence, turn your other cheek.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fgESYQ5iPtI

[Anonymous No.14086018]

Do you cry in your dreams so hard that it leaves a mark of sadness upon you in the morning?

[Anonymous No.14086038]

>>14086018
Yes I wake up crying because I've just had a wonderful dream about being with a wonderful woman and I wake up in my bed alone

[Anonymous No.14086047]

>>14085723
Groomed any 14 yo?
You look a hell lot like Novalis fag

[Anonymous No.14086050]

The man was shot in the hip. A police vehicle crashed into a concrete barrier blocking the road, and smoke rose from the burning car. Firefighters battled the flames to try and control the blaze.

"The officers are trying to make people get out of the way of them as quickly as possible because they are getting heavy, heavy fire," said Sgt. Jeff Ducey of the Seattle police fire department.

Sgt. Ducey said officers and bystanders were putting out the fires that were "literally everywhere" and putting others at risk by trying to break the barrier. A man with a gun, who was holding it on one fire, had been holed up inside the police vehicle.

Two police officers were treated for injuries. Two others got medical treatment, and there were no fatalities, Sgt. Ducey said.

The man was taken to Harborview Medical Center, where he died a short time later, an autopsy determined.

The driver, who was found in jail Tuesday afternoon, was being treated for "mental health issues that were not under control"

[Anonymous No.14086055]

>>14077397
I’m poop

[Anonymous No.14086077]

>>14086047
I won’t have premarital sex. So I would have to get married first. That restricts the age I could interact with a girl. I’d imagine I’d simply ask girls (14-16) out on dates, and see how that goes. It would require a lot of luck of circumstance. If their parents don’t like it, then I’ll honor their opinion. I’m still attracted to girls my age though, so I’ll be fine anyway. It might just be a dream never to be reached, but I will be fine

[Anonymous No.14086079]

>>14086055
Imagine how fucking famous I would be if I killed the entire Vege family. I'd cut old man veges tiny shriveled prick off and watch him bleed to death. I want to hunt like how the hunter takes animals.

[Anonymous No.14086090]

I had a hard time cumming because of my antidepressants so I stuck a finger up my butt to help and realized after I finished that I had an open sore on the tip of the finger. I'm really freaking out now and worried that it's going to get infected. I'm so ashamed of being a degenerate

[Anonymous No.14086091]

>>14086079
I rrmber this two psychos. Who did they kill?

[Anonymous No.14086115]

>>14078442
>he isn't already maximally alienated from society

[Anonymous No.14086124]

>>14086091
I was reading about how Dirlewanger came across a nursery and instructed his men to finish off all the children with the butts of their rifles to save bullets. Even his own men called him a monster.

[Anonymous No.14086127]

>>14079460
I wish I could get to that level. I like the food too much.

[Anonymous No.14086133]

It was over for me in the second grade. My parents were getting divorced and I was pulled out of class to talk to a psychiatrist. I don’t recall what she asked me or how I answered. But that is when I shut down emotionally. I could never handle criticism or rejection. But to be left by your mother is the ultimate rejection. I couldn’t risk any more emotional attachments. To be attached is to risk detachment, rejection. It’s when I became unlovable and unloving.

It wasn’t just the divorce. She left the country. She left behind a phone that was programmed to dial her new line in Germany by speed dial. There was also a packet of stamped and addressed air mail envelopes so we could write (this was the early 90s). I don’t think I ever called or wrote.

At night I’d weep to a crumpled picture of my mother that I’d found in the attic and kept under my pillow.

I replay these scenes in my mind during my philosophical moments, when I’m walking the half mile to my car after work late at night, silent except for cicadas and the asphalt crunching under my shoes. I wince at the final scene, when I was rejected the only time I reached out for love as a teen. It was the younger sister of my brother’s girlfriend. I sensed she was similarly damaged and would be sympathetic. What a fool I was.

She came by my desk today to wash her mug in the sink. She was more well dressed than usual, which made me nervous she had a date tonight. My coworkers all happened to be at their desks. So if I spoke to her, they’d hear. I felt a lump rise in my throat and my face color, as if my body pitied me and wanted to spare me the rejection. It did. I sat red-faced and half-paralyzed as she left the kitchen.

[Anonymous No.14086136]

>>14080202
You are just a narcissist with a lot of excuses.

[Anonymous No.14086143]

Mä en koskaan snaijaa vaimon faijaa.

[Anonymous No.14086167]

From Fall of Berlin (1950)

Nazi officer: The German army is very humane!

*cuts to shot of children swining from nooses*

Officer: The inferior can not properly govern themselves and it is the duty of the German supermen to instill proper discipline and order. We shall instill order all over the entire world....

*shot of German soldiers marching through the town now on fire with several bodies littering the streets*

[Anonymous No.14086232]

It's come to the end of the year again, and I've two exams away from finishing my second year of uni. With two to go though, I'm really for the first time considering what the fuck I'm even doing. Having school placement this semester really makes me reconsider whether I could even be a good teacher or not, and still maintain my true personality. It's soo weird coming from having an extremely neurotic, depressed mother, and a father that thrives in lively social settings and is never anxious. I feel like I'm simultaneously both these things and can't be purely one or purely the other, but as a school teacher, it's heavily based on your confidence, ability to regularly discipline and maintain power over the kids, when I just what to be quiet and friendly with them.

I don't even know what I'm going to do with my Japanese knowledge either because from my experience so far, Japanese people are just awkward or really stand offish. The fuck am I gonna do lol..spent a good part of the last two years and probably like $5k on learning Japanese...mmmm I need some time off to try and think about what I want in life yet again and what I could do with my qualities. I don't whether it's this time of year but I've been feeling really down about things. There's nothing I'm really looking forward to....which makes me think of that line in Sense and Sensibility "that sanguine expectation of happiness which is happiness itself" and I can definitely say that I don't have much to look forward to right now. I just need to write more and think my way into a more optimistic point of view, and try and find good things about where I am, what I've come from, and where I'm going.

[Anonymous No.14086265]

>>14086232
When I was in HS my school system had a foreign exchange agreement worked out with a private school in Sapporo. Every year five japanese students would stay for two semesters. I gotta say, most of those Japanese teens were kinda douchebags. They're polite in a way that feels really surface-level, and if you push them even just a little bit out of that comfort zone they get super combative.

[Anonymous No.14086359]

>>14080680
Lol

[Anonymous No.14086417]

https://www.currentaffairs.org/2018/03/the-intellectual-we-deserve
hmm yes

[Anonymous No.14086430]

>>14086417
>yes I'm an libertarian socialist, why do you ask?

[Anonymous No.14086434]

>>14086265
aren't all high schoolers massive asshole though?

[Anonymous No.14086537]

Can't decide what to watch on Halloween, maybe I'll just do a roulette. I was thinking of just ordering pizza and marathoning Zulawski films on the weekend, to be honest. No, Zulawski deserves better than just pizza. Though, for the next day or two, I'm stuck here doing schoolwork. I chose this

I can't help but be distrustful of other people, or maybe it's a persecution complex that I have. I always feel as if I need to prove myself to my friends, or that they're always trying to one-up me, and so on forth. If I let my guard down for just a second, they'll make me realize how much of a shit-fuck failure I am and how my life is going nowhere and how much better they have it. To be honest, I have it pretty good compared to most people: going to a nice university with expenses paid by the state, 30 minutes away from home, with a normal family. But it's still not enough for me, I just want to have it all. I feel as if he's condescending to me whenever they talk about something I have little knowledge of. I want someone to confide in and hold. I also want them to turn on the heater because it's colder than usual today, I can barely work under these conditions. Every time I go to class I think about how much I want to hold this man that sits at the desk right across from the sofa where I usually study at. I don't even know his name or what he does but goddamn his sweater looks warm and I've never been held in years.

[Anonymous No.14086958]

>>14086136
In what sense? Like I am only afraid of the ego injury of an imperfect relationship? Like I am too high and mighty to properly demean myself for love? I am curious what you mean. I don't suggest you are wrong.

[Anonymous No.14087090]

>>14086958
>>14080202
re-read those posts in a couple years

[Anonymous No.14087130]

>>14087090
Not helpful. I guess you are mocking my tone, but if there is some other lesson you think will show itself to me in a matter of years I'd ask you just say it. Am I supposed to stop being introspective and analytic? Am I supposed to stop caring about the sufferings of myself and others?

[Anonymous No.14087234]

I want that stupid fucking mick cop and his stupid fucking brat to die so god damn bad. I swear, I'm going to have a heart attack. They should NOT be alive.

[Anonymous No.14087324]

NIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGERNIGGER

[Anonymous No.14087398]

everyone but me is a pussy

[Anonymous No.14087402]

Most people say being confident and comfortable with yourself is a life long journey, is there any truth to this? I constantly have internal conflicts and I feel my anxiety getting worse and worse.

[Anonymous No.14087404]

Have you noticed how people no longer address others by name, and instead exclusively use impersonal second person pronouns? Wat does this mean?

[Anonymous No.14087410]

I'm such a fucking waste of space. I want everything to be handed to me. I have no drive, no initiative. Joining the army sounds like a dream: no thinking, just unquestioningly following orders. Freedom from thought.

[Anonymous No.14087412]

>>14087402
Most people are insecure normies who work in retail and office cubicles, do you think a Jünger or Napoleon had problem with this?
better not to get into this mode of coping

[Anonymous No.14087413]

>>14087410

[Anonymous No.14087426]

Finnegans Wake is like having a stroke for 500 pages

[Anonymous No.14087449]

>>14087412
>better not get into this mode of coping
could you expand?

[Anonymous No.14087479]

I sometimes hate how some people ask me why I read. To be meaningfully entertained, to intellectually grow, to make use of the retard brain I have, to become a better writer. Fucking retards. Why do you watch anime then, faggot? Watch what you want, but having this false sense of superiority for watching anime of all things is ridiculous (also I'm well aware I'm coming across as somewhat hypocritical here, but I'm just angry rn).

On this: my mind is torn between: a) making them understand that anime, for the most part, is meagre base entertainment addiction which demands most nothing from the viewer, or b) just letting them be which means they might continue to be a brainlet and never grow. What must I do here? My mind is always caught at what the right act to do is.

[Anonymous No.14087490]

>>14087479
>but having this false sense of superiority for watching anime of all things is ridiculous
I have to feel good about SOMETHING, anon.

[Anonymous No.14087492]

Sometimes my mind is particularly vulnerable to criticism and comments and anything that I don't like, and sometimes it's super resilient and knows the exact right responses to scenarios. Recently, my
mind has tended toward the former. How can I be mentally stronger? I want fortitude. God, when will the turbulence of youth resolve itself.

[Anonymous No.14087496]

>>14087449
I see it as dramatizing a mundanity, dressing up weakness as a battle... like something you’d here from a professional “motivational speaker”, so weak people can feel like a brave fighter in the face of their depression, anxiety without ever actually doing anything, a poisonous love of victimhood

[Anonymous No.14087515]

>>14077397
If I could press a button to literally never have to talk with you, I think I might well press it. Fuck you, tomato. Stupid fucking emotionally entitled cunt. Just because people have always been lining up to support you, date you, fuck you, deal with your tantrums, and give you attention does not mean I do. Stupid bitch gets uppity and snarky when I deny her attention. How dare you blame me for not wanting to deal with your shitty behavior. Cunt whore. Hope your shitty escapades catch up to you and that you realize eventually that people put up with you because of your coquettishness and your looks and that how vacuous that way of life is and that you endure some suffering because of it.

[Anonymous No.14087521]

>>14077397
Our Scriptures are human Scriptures and tell nothing of the Old Creation, the lost and forgotten playthings of a meandering God.

[Anonymous No.14087701]

>>14087413
got more of those pics? my favorite observing wojacks

[Anonymous No.14087704]

>>14087701
forgot a pic.

[Anonymous No.14087707]

>>14087410
Um based?
I substituted it for studying pure math.

[Anonymous No.14087728]

*ahem*
AaAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHJJHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[Anonymous No.14087730]

>>14077397
How about no? Don't tell me what to do.

[Anonymous No.14087756]

>>14085608
I was volcel until my mid-twenties and I have a deeper emotional attachment to a girl who friendzoned me and who I only ever held hands with than I do to any of the girls I've kissed or fucked. I unironically believe that dating is more harmful to your future marital bliss than pre-marital sex. When you really vibe with a girl you're also physically attracted to? It's hard to shake.

[Anonymous No.14087761]

>>14085419
It's probably a playground song that was invented for jumprope or hopscotch

[Anonymous No.14087781]

>>14087410
try farm work. you can even volunteer for lodging and food, this way you really can stop thinking and do your job - which will be useful to others, unlike wasting space but in the army.
it's also much calmer, military almost always only enhances your mental disorders. mindless farm work allows you to learn order without as much stress.

[Anonymous No.14087812]

first snow! some fell yesterday, but it melted quickly.

[Anonymous No.14087815]

>>1407739gyubbji

[Anonymous No.14088033]

Wondering where peers have gone. Empty life, idiocy creeps in. I haven't typed earnestly in months. Barrier to sequential thought. Robotic. Listless. Fuck this.

[Anonymous No.14088058]

What do people see in nature? All I see are shapes, meters and forms with nothing to fill. How can they just walk and fully fill themselves with the godless nothing that nature of nature is?

[Anonymous No.14088074]

>>14088058
God creature nature, idiot.

[Anonymous No.14088077]

>>14088074
and that suddenly means nature isn't godless
bravo!

[Anonymous No.14088081]

I want to commit murder
I want to strangle someone
I want to see the life drain from their face as my hands are around their neck
I know it’s not okay to think like this
And I’ve never thought like this before
But I’ve walked softly for my entire life
And now I’m carrying a really big fucking stick

[Anonymous No.14088105]

>>14087404
I didn't notice this at large. But I used to have a kind of social anxiety around using peoples' names because of some silly hang up like it was possessive or like someone had to give me some implicit permission to use their name before I could start. Then in trying to undo the damage I flipped it around to where I always use people's names now, probably too often to where it sounds autistic.

[Anonymous No.14088107]

>>14088058
You can see three things: 1. You can see in nature the history of matter; for example how mountains grew over centuries and so on; like a geologist would see nature. 2. You can see in nature the history of people; for example how they used the space that they found and how they in turned were shaped by it; like a historian would see nature. 3. You can see yourself in nature; like an artist would see nature.

All nature has a feeling: woods, fields, brooks
Are life eternal: and in silence they
Speak happiness beyond the reach of books;
There's nothing mortal in them; their decay
Is the green life of change; to pass away
And come again in blooms revivified.
Its birth was heaven, eternal it its stay,
And with the sun and moon shall still abide
Beneath their day and night and heaven wide.

[Anonymous No.14088110]

>>14088081
the desire to murder someone who has wronged you is based
the inarticulate desire to murder someone at random is cringe and neckbeard-pilled

pic related: this is you

[Anonymous No.14088126]

>>14077415
>just force people to do things I want and everything will be fixed
Go away

[Anonymous No.14088129]

>>14088110
I should have been more specific, this desire is for one person.
Perhaps this random desire is for all the suffering they’ve caused me.
Please give me my based points now.

[Anonymous No.14088219]

>>14079299
Jokes on you I live in a Eastern European village so some people don't even have running water and their toilet is a small shack in their garden, those people are really free aren't they

[Anonymous No.14088417]

>>14088219
I've thought about this recently and realized plumbing alone elevates quality of life into the sky, and is something people who fantasize about living off the grid or whatever should really take into consideration

[Anonymous No.14088426]

>>14088126
straw man

[Anonymous No.14088446]

>>14087812
Yes, first snow is beautiful, comrade.

[Anonymous No.14088447]

I’m on a cocktails of meds(50mg Zoloft and 5mg abilify), and they’ve so thoroughly cured my depression that it makes me wonder if I was ill at all. My desire for medication to cure what ailed me almost matched my desire for friends and a woman who wasn’t bad repulsed by my existence. Now that one of my chief desires has been fulfilled my self hatred and destabilized mood is all but gone. Was it the medication or the fulfillment of my desire that cured me? I wish I knew. I wish I was normal. But for now, I’ll settle for this artificial happiness.

[Anonymous No.14088536]

>>14088081
>I want to murder someone
Start with yourself

[Anonymous No.14088538]

Happy Halloween.
>Trick or treat, smell my feet, give me something good to eat

[Anonymous No.14088542]

>>14088219
Buna ziua frate :-)

[Anonymous No.14088574]

>>14088447
The problem with chemical treatments for depression is that they artificially regulate brain chemistry to mimic the profile of someone with a healthy, fulfilled life.

Love, for example, on one level of description is a particular circuit, neurochemical algorithm. There are steps to falling in love organically, a series of experiences with another person and a corresponding set of brain states. If one could take a pill for love, the sensation of it, would it be, philosophically speaking, actual love? Analogously one can say the same for chemically induced contentment.

Look around at your life. The same problems are there, the same defects that made you unhappy. They are still there. Pills can't change that. They can't teach you new behaviors. That's why pharmacological treatments of depression ultimately fail. You will eventually need to up the dosage to feel the same way, and then again. Constant titration in order to produce the same simulacrum of happiness.

[Anonymous No.14088606]

>>14088447
>it makes me wonder if I was ill at all
Protip: you weren't. So-called "depression" is not an illness, it's a spiritual void.

[Anonymous No.14088956]

Addicted to saying nigger.

I am obsessed with the word. I see people on the street and I abuse them in my internal monologue calling them niggers.

Also, the entire 4chan keeps jumping from one philosopher to another calling them "based". I feel like you should first read Stanford encyclopedia of Philosophy before reading any Philosopher, be it Whitehead or Hegel.

I also don't know why people are such big fans of Hegel.

[Anonymous No.14089175]

>>14088956
>I feel like you should first read Stanford encyclopedia of Philosophy before reading any Philosopher
That's because you have a low IQ and project your mental deficiencies onto others

[Anonymous No.14089269]

Snowing on Halloween. Quite nice.

[Anonymous No.14089311]

>>14089269
time for Nightmare Before Christmas, heh?

[Anonymous No.14089350]

>>14089175

Okay maybe I do. So you read books directly and keep jumping from one Philosopher to other trying to fill in your world view are what? Enlightened?

Stop hiding your Psychosis with Philosophical mumbo-jumbo.

Also, stop calling everyone a low IQ. Only low IQ insecure people do that.

[Anonymous No.14089379]

abloo bloo blooo
t. everyone

[Anonymous No.14089425]

>>14088058
did you grow up in the city? how beautiful was the architecture? how shitty were the parks?

[Anonymous No.14089427]

>>14088956
There is something deliciously zesty about slurs. Their cutting, gutteral bluntness. Nigger. Faggot. Niggerfaggot. Even viewed abstractly , phonetically , there is a satisfying thunk to these words. They have teeth and claws. They're ripe and juicy. And they are so extrenable. Niggery. Faggoty. Niggy, faggy. Nigfag.

[Anonymous No.14089431]

>>14089427
>Extrenable
Extendable

[Anonymous No.14089463]

>>14089427
> extandable
in Russian obscene language is like a burlesque dialect. many common words ( like mouth, face, food, etc) have rude equivalents that aren't even negative towards the subject.
sometimes a slur is what makes the plainest sentences shatter and shine like a diamond. to swear eloquently is a respectable and praised skill.

[Anonymous No.14089487]

>>14088574
Not him, but I'd like your thoughts on my situation. I have rough anxiety, and I used to take paxil and venlafaxine (both low dosages, admittedly) for a couple years. I was then off for a year or so but now again feel the anxiety and concomitant weakness. So what are my courses or action, if I want to keep meds away? Accept that constitution is prone to nerves, and thus reduce environments that stress me out OR somehow strengthen my mind to minimize the anxiety? If the latter, I don't know how to achieve that.

[Anonymous No.14089490]

my bf has been emotionally cheating on me and I have no one to vent to bc he's my only friend
no I'm not gay

[Anonymous No.14089498]

>>14089463

My father was a master of slurs and abuses. He's probably the most hurtful person I know but his words were so powerful. I believe my love for literature comes from him.

[Anonymous No.14089546]

>>14089490
what's going on?

[Anonymous No.14089551]

I feel like I ended up living the same reality I wanted to avoid. I now am living a life I totally didn't want to live.

Alone. Depressed. Addicted. I am good at my work and I suppose that's why life doesn't suck as much as it should given my Psychological condition.

I really was happiest when I was in love. But it's been years since I even entertained the idea of dating. I have been a daily smoker for the past decade. I tried to quit this summer and I made.it past 70 days. And life too got better. But I still longed for human companionship.

Life seems to be harder for me. Things that come easily to others seem to look impossible to me.

One thing I have always loved was books. I was reading Thomas Pynchon and I was well within the book. But last week I realized that all the books, and the Philosophy I'm trying to read is only something I want to fill my own emptiness. I read every Philosopher thinking that this book will make me realize what life is all about. I have always been waiting to know what life is all about. I was reading Pynchon for the same reason. That it would fundamentally shatter my conceptual metaphors. But nothing happened, it was just a story at the end of the day. With a special emphasis on duality based thinking.

I have not given up though. Now is the time to live for something great. I say fuck it, let's break my own barriers. Perhaps relationships do lead to a long and meaningful life. But that is not something I have. So I'll just go ahead and make the best of my loneliness.

If only I could quit marijuana and also feel the high.

[Anonymous No.14089571]

>>14089546
been together for three years. We were planning to get engaged once we got into to the same med school. I finally got him to admit that he's been acting on his feelings for someone at work. They've been going on dates and flirting on instagram or whatever.

He cried and apologized and I forgave him bc he's all I have. Am i retarded? Thank u for reading ;-;

[Anonymous No.14089586]

>>14089571
Kill him and then yourself, but erotically.

[Anonymous No.14089593]

>>14089350
>So you read books directly
Yes, duh
>and keep jumping from one Philosopher to other trying to fill in your world view
Um, no. I have the Bible for that, and two or three philosophers to whom I return over and over. Sometimes I'll read others on a topic I've been pondering.
>Stop hiding your Psychosis with Philosophical mumbo-jumbo
pray tell where I did that
>stop calling everyone a low IQ
I don't, but you needed to know that letting someone tell you how to think about a text before you've read it is a sign that you're mentally colonized; stupid and lacking in scholarly ambition.

[Anonymous No.14089622]

>>14089571
That's just cheating, anon. End it with him. I empathize with you, and I know it can feel terribly hard since it seems he means a lot to you, but you need to treat yourself with more respect. Don't be with someone who would do that to you.

Dump him, and do something productive with the time you've gained. Cardio helps a ton.

[Anonymous No.14089656]

>>14089571
Does your name start with T lmfao

[Anonymous No.14089674]

>>14089656
no it doesn't lol
>>14089622
thank you anon. Gonna take a walk

[Anonymous No.14089755]

>>14089551
>But last week I realized that all the books, and the Philosophy I'm trying to read is only something I want to fill my own emptiness. I read every Philosopher thinking that this book will make me realize what life is all about. I have always been waiting to know what life is all about. I was reading Pynchon for the same reason. That it would fundamentally shatter my conceptual metaphors. But nothing happened, it was just a story at the end of the day.

well put
me too

[Anonymous No.14089759]

>>14089593

> I read Bible.

Fuck off low IQ creationist. I hope you only read Bible for ethical reasons and don't take the entire thing seriously. Bible is Pychosis. It's okay to have various ways to look at the world but if your primary world view is That Jesus died for our sons, then I'd say lift yourself out of degeneracy brother. Why believe in a falsity? God dead nigga.

> Don't curb my scholarly ambitions by telling me how to approach a Philosopher.

Really? So I suppose there is no reason for prefaces. Why not just jump into Chapter 1? Won't having a preface mean the book is killing my scholarly ambitions?

[Anonymous No.14089921]

>>14089759
You are patently retarded

[Anonymous No.14090128]

>>14089921

It's clearly obvious that both of us are not retarded. Okay, I'll be respectful from here onwards.

The motivation that people have is to understand the views of a Philosopher. Reading is much more than reading a book, there is research involved, criticisms to understand etc. SEP gives you a good overview.

Trust me, I too like an erudite reading experience. But seldom do books present a balanced view. An introductory text is always a good way to start approaching any Philosophical idea or author.

But maybe you are a genius. Perhaps my suggestions don't apply to overmen like you.

[Anonymous No.14090157]

I signed up at a catsitting agency this summer. I really didn't think anything would come out of it; why would they book me, the faceless stranger, instead of any one else? I put it off for the longest time.
And it turns out to be the greatest fun. In several ways beside the spending of time with kitties. I got to meet such interesting characters, that I'd honestly love to hang with in real life, stepped foot into the fanciest places and had access to well-conducted libraries. I just came home from a first meet-up with new clients and they were good fun. We joked around and they were super nice and grateful. I feel energised from this little interaction with strangers already.

[Anonymous No.14090299]

>>14088058

>>14088107
Well said. Here's how Yi Fu Tuan put the same idea in Topophilia:

>Sir Kenneth Clark, the art historian, underlined the ephemerality of visual pleasure when he said, "I fancy that one cannot enjoy a pure esthetic sensation (so-called) for longer than one can enjoy the smell of an orange, which in my case is less than two minutes." What Kenneth Clark says of art appreciation is equally true in the appreciation of scenery. However intense, it is fleeting unless one's eyes are kept to it for some other reason, either the recall of historical events that hallowed the scene or recall of its underlying reality in geology and structure.

>On the importance of the historical association, F. L. Lucas wrote:
>The first time I saw the cloud-topped mountain ridges of Acroceraunia from the Adriatic, or the Leucadian Promontory white with sun and storm, or Hymettus, purpled with sunset, from the Saronic Sea, was something intenser even than poetry. But the same shapes and colors would not have seemed the same in New Zealand or the Rockies. Half their transfigured splendour came from the poetry of two thousand years before, or the memory of that other sunset on Hymettus when the hemlock was brought to Socrates.