/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.13616826]

Write what's on your mind

[Anonymous No.13616876]

>>13616826

[Anonymous No.13616878]

>>13616826
Good writing gets under your skin. Makes you pick at your scabs. A perverse fascination with surface tension and depth, marking protrusions and valleys, or tracing the fault lines from one traumatic point to the next.

Hopkins' Terrible Sonnets; Johnathan Swift's excursions into scatological fascinations; Baudelaire's rotting prostitutes; Beckett's face buried in the mud; these are all valuable contributions by those who cannot help themselves around chunks of inanimate matter, the void as objectivity, the Outside crumbling In.

Robert Browning has significance here as the poet of excoriation par excellence: Soliloquy Of The Spanish Cloister is a dying man's frantic accounting of his life and its contents as his body decays, while the life of the deceased scholar in Grammarian's Funeral is committed to the project of enlightenment (learning and cataloging knowledge), heightening the experience (in its course unto death) to one of joissance.

However, the textual body is not just the individual, material body: its anatomy extends to matter as the immanent ground, the body as landscape, the immersion of the subject 6 feet deep as the cycle of disintegration repurposes its content for nutritional value elsewhere. This is the narrative approach: An author plots a topological map stretched across the surface, populated with flora and fauna, riddled with gaping puckers, punctures, folds, stretch marks, festering sores and scars which drag the trauma of the past screaming into the present. No longer, as in poetry, we must reduce experience to the fragments or partial objects which haunt our interior, atemporal voice; a vector of movement through space and time brings the possibility for eventual encounters, atomic collisions, collaborations, antagonisms, metaphysical crises. Characters must tread carefully around these latter black holes for fear of disappearing into them altogether.

Where fiction unfurls, critique draws first blood from authority, in words and violence: consider the self-deconstructing crucifixion, or luther's 95 theses. Both exemplify the violent remainder of the real, and highlight its refusal to be incorporated into the symbolic order. God dismantles absolute certainty in himself by making his son mortal, while Luther carves out an independent revolution against ecclesiastical authority which cannot change unless brutally pierced from the outside.

The codes of hegemony disavows all petty violence committed against its body through the scab, while simultaneously refusing to acknowledge any entity (any enemy) that lies beyond itselfl. Just as in a real body, cells are replaced, sealing and covering up the evidence of mortality, a blemish that serves as a medal. After all, God has no enemies, not even in his disbelievers: if all men are his children, then those who disbelieve are not considered of his flock, and therefore counted as neither a man, nor even a sheep.

[Anonymous No.13616890]

>>13616826
i'm a failed normie pushing 40. i've never experienced real love, passion, excitement or fun. i've slept with a bunch of average girls and tried some drugs. i've had some friends that i stopped contacting because i lost interest in them. i haven't tried to hook up since over 5 years and i've come to the realization that my time is up. the only thing awaiting me is a row of unpleasant to mediocre events which will culminate in death. my funeral won't be attended by anyone.

[Anonymous No.13616899]

When I was 15 I used to take a shit and my dad had been ocasionally hanging out around the toilet asking me why I was so silent. First time I didn't respond so he tried to force open the door shouting: "Why are you keeping silence, what's going on there?" He started swearing and tellong me he's gonna knock down the door, also he used to swear when I forgot to flush the toilet, not only after I took a shit, but even right after the shit left my asshole saying that it stank. He used to tell me: "When I just took a shit I always flush it down and you have to do the same!" One day I was sitting on the toilet and heard that my dad stood right next to the door, so I wipe my ass and got on my knees - there's a chink under the door - so I watch through the chink and see my dad on his knees looking at me through the chink saying: "What's wrong with you? What the hell are you doing there?" By the way dad always drinks some decoction which makes him take a dump often, like 5 times a day, then he complains his ass is sore and farts. That's fucked up! That's a real story I'm not a troll.

[Anonymous No.13616936]

>>13616899
>I WANT YOU TO LEAVE THOSE LOGS IN THERE FOR ME TO INSPECT

[Anonymous No.13616953]

>>13616899
Sorry but you and your family should be lobotomized or euthanized.

[Anonymous No.13616967]

>>13616826
Epstein was obviously bumped off so that the Mossad pedo blackmail ring that controls the US government wouldnt be exposed (look up who attended the funeral of Ghislaine Maxwell's father)

[Anonymous No.13617796]

>>13616826
Why nobody read my writing

[Anonymous No.13617802]

I wish I was interesting enough to be a Twitter personality

[Anonymous No.13617810]

I've made up my mind to fuck a dog in public, I was thinking of this for a while and posted in threads about it but I am going to dominate a female dog in public.

[Anonymous No.13617811]

>>13617802
I somehow have 419 followers despite being the least consistent/coherent/interesting account on twitter just about. You too can achieve twitter mediocrity!

[Anonymous No.13617815]

>>13617802
〔〔 〕〕 r(etard)/acc has a place for you as a sissy pozed fake-larper-schizo transsexual compulsive masturbator with a semi-popular Twitter following and a midwit but above average IQ.

[Anonymous No.13617820]

>>13617815
I don't have AIDS though

[Anonymous No.13617821]

>>13617811
>>13617802
>using or browsing Twitter at all

[Anonymous No.13617825]

>>13617811
>>13617815
Everytime I've posted something I've deleted it because our all just seems so lame and boring and somrthing a zillion other people could have said. I hate to think that
>>13617821
Is right... I'm an NPC

[Anonymous No.13617830]

>>13617821
I went without using it for something like 7 years, but then I realized Nick Land was on there along with a few other major personalities and I wanted to interact with them so I did

[Anonymous No.13617833]

>>13617825
Style yourself as trad, then everything you repeat that's been said before is just you fulfilling your essential nature because nothing new under the sun, all true wisdom exists already, etc.

[Anonymous No.13617839]

>>13617821
Even fucking Guénon has twitter

[Anonymous No.13618172]

wake up schizo trannies and dispossessed alt-right wannabe school shooters and overthrow your tyrant overlords. thank god i live in the third world

[Anonymous No.13618246]

>>13616826
Dragon semen is highly magical and has the capacity to effect a number of transformations, both by itself and in conjunction with other
ritual techniques and magical ingredients. Draconic hypervirility is the most commonly proposed mechanism for these transformations.
Dragon semen has the effect of feminizing most male humans, while masculinizing most female humans. Interestingly, MtF transformations leave
the males in question as sterile and incapable of lactation, essentially rendering them sexually functional but not reproductively functional.
FtM transformations seem to be complete, however. Here are some of the known transformation vectors of dragon semen:

MtF, or Male-to-Fuckhole:

Sufficiently small doses of dragon semen, applied to human males, produce extreme rapid feminization without any further effects. This extends to
psychological changes as well as anatomical ones. Semen diluted in a laboratory setting is often found as a black market transition aid, though due to
poor quality control and individual variance, the effects produced by this can range from normal feminization to "bimbofication" to other, more severe
transformations even in the absence of magical ritual. Dragons themselves, particularly eastern dragons, manage the application of semen thusly:
first, they surround the human male victim. They then perform oral sex on each other until sufficient quantities of semen are ingested. After this,
they begin licking the victim until enough residual chemicals have been absorbed by the skin of the victim to facilitate change.

Pseudo-vorarephilic transformations become possible after dragons have ingested sufficient semen. By sucking on the arms or legs of the victim, these
limbs can be made to dissappear, ostensibly by transforming sympathetically into more dragon semen themselves. This can be done with the rest of the
body as well, though usually it is done in conjunction with additional techniques that preserve the genitals. By first licking the cunt, lips, and
asshole of the victim before taking them into the mouth, the victim's genitals are turned into fleshlights within the mouth of the dragon or dragons
that perform the psuedo-vorarephilic operation. These fleshlights maintain the unitary consciousness of the victim. Their appearance can be very
ornamental, with elaborate draconic script, which ironically typically only contains abusive sexual epithets like "bitch", "fuckhole", or "slut".

Other forms of transformation include into a single boob with anus and pussy, or into just the hips and buttocks with attached genitals.

[Anonymous No.13618336]

>>13616826
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[Anonymous No.13618354]

>>13618336
what's wrong, did you buy high, sell low?

[Anonymous No.13618366]

>>13616826
I want to sexually torture a tarantula to death. I begin by pulling off its legs one by one, starting with the tibia at the knee, then the coxa from the thorax. As these legs come apart I then begin pushing my tounge into the mouth. Then, before I'm done, I grab the tarantula's head completely and pull it forward until it collapses onto the ground. Afterwards, I pull its throat so it stops breathing and pinches its eyes shut so a tingle and buzz is felt. This is the best experience I've had in captivity.

[Anonymous No.13618384]

I'm an ugly beta autist loser 28 year old with no friends, acquaintances or social experiences since school, no female attention ever, and I've never been to a pub, club, or party, even through university.

I did a degree I had no interest in, so I forgot everything in it. I became the ugly loser that nobody talked to within one day of all of my jobs. I'm blackpilled and know that women and Chads have lives on easy mode and sex and good times on tap, while my life will be difficult

I waste all my free time on internet browsing. I binge on junk food and coffee almost every day, which rapes my bank balance. I have no passions. I have read many more books than most people my age but couldn't talk about anything in an informative manner for more than 10 minutes. I see my previous success in education as evidence of my lack of initiative and high docility. I now feel more proud of the times when I did badly due to losing all interest- at least that was evidence of balls.

I'm a meek, charismaless loser. I failed over 50 graduate job interview processes. I have a good job that I will start later this year but I am not posh or extroverted enough to succeed in the workplace. A large percentage of my money will go on rent. Working 9-5 feels like a prison sentence.

I'm 28 and have none of the happy social memories that people my age have. I lived in London for over a year and felt sad the entire time, from summer to summer. My job miraculously required no work and I couldn't use the time at all. I spent two years straight as a NEET or working part time, and I didn't show any initiative to do anything seriously productive in my free time at all.

I envy people that can "produce", i.e., entrepreneurs, STEM academics, good artists. I just mindlessly consume. And at work, I will be a bureaucrat. I am back office material without any connections. There are hundreds of 21 year olds making millions through software.

[Anonymous No.13618414]

>>13616826
talked to a girl at the store today. she told me she wants to be an entrepreneur someday. cutie.

[Anonymous No.13618421]

how do i stop having conversations with myself till i get a headache?

[Anonymous No.13618473]

>>13618384

sorry to hear that it's been tough for you so far. it's never too late to change your habits

[Anonymous No.13618538]

>>13618384
same except i'm into stem but no job and almost homeless. I've even managed to convince myself that not having money isn't such a bad thing and even better in some cases. But the idea is shaky and i plunge into low self esteem bouts every time i hear or see someone having over average success.
I have absolutely no social skills and i am always filled with dread that i may not be doing something that is required. Completely filled with dread about the social process surrounding a job interview. Every time i talk to someone on phone it's like they're talking down to me, i just don't stand a chance. Completely isolated and waste my time in consumption too because i have no motivation anymore.

[Anonymous No.13618559]

[Anonymous No.13618572]

I'm struck by how realistically the 1911 Britannica deals with the problem of prostitution.

"In practical language, prostitution offers, through abuse of the sexual instinct, a means of livelihood which a certain proportion of women prefer to other means. It is often assumed by philanthropic moralists that no other means are open to them. That may be so in cases in which deception or constraint has been used, and adverse circumstances—such as lack of friends and a harsh social code—close the door to other occupations; but to suppose that such cases account for prostitution is to misapprehend the problem. The detailed investigations of various observers and the experience of rescue societies prove that the great majority of prostitutes prefer that means of livelihood to others entailing regular work, discipline and self-control. When they really cease to prefer the life, they leave it voluntarily.[1] Otherwise there is extreme difficulty in reclaiming even the few who will consent to try, and permanent success is only attained with a small proportion of them. The earliest attempt at reclamation met with the same result. It was carried out by the Roman empress Theodora, wife of Justinian, herself a prostitute in early life. She established a home for 500 women on the Bosporus, but after a time they could not bear the restraint; some threw themselves into the sea, and eventually the scheme was abandoned. The preference is due to several causes, of which indolence is the chief. Prostitutes are drawn mainly from the lower classes; the life offers them an escape from the toil which would otherwise be their lot. Women who present themselves to the police for inscription on the continent of Europe frequently give as their reason for embracing the life, that they do not intend to work any more. Other causes are love of excitement and dislike of restraint. The same qualities make the criminal and the wastrel."

[Anonymous No.13618778]

>>13618384
I can relate. The only jobs I got out of uni were from people I knew personally. One was my dad, another was an old friend my highschool. So in that way I am even more useless than you. I am just kind of like an organizer...a paper shuffler to help keep things running smoothly. It's unsatisfying but it pays for now.

Have you ever thought of simply changing things up? 28 isn't too late to change things... one last time. I know a lot of guys that have had a existential crises at 26-34 and totally changed their lives, got into a new trade, etc. I made a resolution to have a plan before I turn 30. I have a bunch of ideas, and some have even been considered good or interesting by others, but I am scared to really put myself out there desu. One of my ideas is heavily inspired by books like Growth of the Soil and Butcher's Crossing. It's romantic and adventurous I realize, but I think I can put a pragmatic spin on it and really make something of myself. I still have hope, although I realize if I fail to realize these dreams things won't go well for me.

[Anonymous No.13618813]

>>13616899
Very good post.

[Anonymous No.13618824]

>>13618384
Londonfrog...?

[Anonymous No.13618831]

>>13618246
Incoherent at parts, go to sleep and reread

[Anonymous No.13618839]

Fuck that trannie from the last thread, right?

[Anonymous No.13618841]

>>13618831
I don't think that will help

[Anonymous No.13618848]

>>13618384
You for got the part where you go "And I'd rather keep living like this than try to turn things around and start by googling 'how to fix bad habits' because I secretly quite enjoy my lifestyle, life's alright"

[Anonymous No.13618860]

>>13618421
Stop wanting to be the edgy snowflake that talks to himself until he gets a headache
(Impossible for you)

[Anonymous No.13618894]

>>13616878
Great writing

[Anonymous No.13619079]

>>13618384
Go spend a week in the Peruvian jungle doing ayahuasca

[Anonymous No.13619805]

Up early again. Crud! I should really cut back on caffeine and alcohol.
gf is away so I'll stay up and surf the net. Maybe I'll clean the house. No, fuck it. Pet the kitty and surf the net.

[Anonymous No.13619818]

>>13617802

1. Clock in your adverbs and adjectives.
2. Incessantly retweet yourself.
3. Always partake in the circle jerk of the day but make sure to be COMPLETELY redundant.

[Anonymous No.13619824]

Got alot of drafts, looking throught them to find any gold but it's all just shame really.
got put on the graveyard shift for a few months so i need to be REAL disciplined (had to fix up my room and everything too.
Even though i have tons of friends now, i have good physical health, and i have a good sleep schedule, I still want to fucking die most of the time. I might have depression, but if i get it looked at i might loose my job.
Who the hell eats raisins?

[Anonymous No.13619867]

>>13618414
There's an attractive girl at my workplace that I see like 4 times a week and I don't even know her name. In the course of 4 months I think we've exchanged like 7 sentences total. I usually greet everyone else, but I just silently walk past her everytime since we havent even established any sort of relation as humans, and for an autist like me I can't tell if I should be the one to initiate it first.

Can't tell if she doesn't want to talk to me or thinks I don't want to talk to her, therefore she doesn't talk to me. It's just weird, man.

[Anonymous No.13619912]

>>13619824
Just keep going. Find something you love and work towards it. Right now my life's goal has been put on hold for over a year due to many injuries, and I've had just about enough of everything else, too. Still, giving up is the last thing on my mind. Don't give in.

[Anonymous No.13620042]

>>13619824
>Who the hell eats raisins?
I do

[Anonymous No.13620936]

>>13619867
just say "hello, i've seen you around but don't think we've met, i'm anon. nice to meet you" and then move on with your day. shes a human bean too, anon.

[Anonymous No.13620950]

Say what you will about the Confederacy but they had one rootin tootin foot-stampin theme song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OKdbc0DYpM

[Anonymous No.13621200]

>>13616826
Just made some apricot jam.
Idk are nuclear power plants actually good?
Is cleaning up after a disaster realistic?

[Anonymous No.13621406]

>>13616826
On the bring of discovery lies the abyss of oblivion.

[Anonymous No.13621421]

I'm attracted to women but I'm deeply sexually repressed so seeing breasts/vaginas fills me with intense anxiety, and porn is even worse
I'm currently writing a fantasy romance novel about a knight and a tsundere warrior princess. They're in their 20s, but they only go as far as kissing, hand holding, blushing, and cuddling.

[Anonymous No.13621566]

dear diary desu,
i miss gf, hopefully she will return soon. i feel an impending sense of doom. anxiety sucks. depression sucks. woe is me. things are good, too good. and i really want a super volcano or something

[Anonymous No.13621611]

>be me
>look into mirror
>realize that I don't understand what I am seeing
>i don't even know what is looking into the mirror

[Anonymous No.13621625]

I copied my post from a similar thread on /wg.


I feel as though I'm floating in some sort of sea and there is no movement on the surface. Nothing I do will change the state the sea is in nor the direction I'm floating towards. If I had a gun and put it against my head and pulled the trigger it wouldn't matter. I feel as though everything is set in stone no matter what path I take. I have no idea who I am what I want or don't want. I'm just about 18 and I already feel like my life is over.

>>13617802
They banned me. (It was probably the antisemitism.)

[Anonymous No.13621744]

Love is the loveliest of the emotions and worth being worshiped like an eternal thing.

[Anonymous No.13621765]

>>13621625
Read Seneca's Letters from a Stoic. Maybe you'll find it interesting, or even enjoyable. Reading it in the morning always gave me lots of energy, even on bad days.

[Anonymous No.13621905]

>>13621765
Thanks for the suggestion. It's on my list.

[Anonymous No.13621991]

I want more wholesome experiences and a sense of genuine connection to other people.

[Anonymous No.13622033]

>>13616826

Nice painting of God.

[Anonymous No.13622085]

Anyone's got the pdf of Sex and Character(Otto Weininger)?

[Anonymous No.13622094]

I am trying to navigate my low consc. openness and general aversion to hiercharchy with my innate understanding that competence breeds hierachy and I need to find my place within it. I recently decided to forge my own path and career, and unsurprisingly, I am currently really broke and lonely. Women of course don't want to stay with you in the beginning, they generally only want to show up once/if you succeed. When I had a stable job, I was unhappy but I had money, apartment, and health insurance. I still have that apartment (for now), but not sure how much longer. Unsurprisingly, my ex is now my ex and I have no current to speak of.

[Anonymous No.13622168]

My depression made me so disconnected from the world these last few months I'm currently working on living isolated in the countryside with no internet, just me and books, I'll probably not be able to live very long out there but who cares.

I literally can't endure modern life, but I'm also way too dumb to be part of intellectual circles or at least spend time with interesting people. My brain is so numb I can't focus on reading for more than 5 minutes, just writing this shitty post is already a lot.

I tried living the lie of the modern world, got a job as a software developer and hated everything about office life and politics, I know everyone hates it expect psychopaths but in my case, I can't even fake it, I physically cannot fake interest for the sake of career advancement. So lately I've noticed I became addicted to sugar and slowly falling back into my old porn habits.

I simply don't see how you can be even remotely happy in the current state of the Western world.

[Anonymous No.13622188]

This Dollars Trilogy with Clint Eastwood is the shit. So atmospheric and stylized and badass.

[Anonymous No.13622195]

I want to share my writing but I feel too shy. It feels strange, in real life I got called confident yesterday, but I feel shy on the inside, I don't even have a problem showing people my writing in real life! I showed my poetry to a female friend outside a tube station, she put her head on my shoulder when the sun went down. I don't think she cared about the poetry...

[Anonymous No.13622245]

>>13622195
I would like to read one of your poems - so please post one

[Anonymous No.13622261]

>>13622188
For a Few Dollars More > The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly > A Fistful of Dollars
But that's just my opinion.

[Anonymous No.13622284]

>>13620936
I haven't done so for so long it's gunna seem weird now.

[Anonymous No.13622327]

>>13616826
fucking shit fuck shit okay hey its not so bad hey relax take a breath look around you the airs alright you're not being shot you're not shooting anyone you got no gun that's okay go get one maybe later the world can be okay if you let it but its not so great you have to accept that then it'll be less bad lower your expectations

[Anonymous No.13622383]

I don't like my family. My father is a smart retard whose brain is broken from his protestant upbringing. My sister is an even bigger loser than am I but refuses to do literally anything to change her situation. My aunt is an actual diagnosed narcissist. My grandparents are peak boomers who live in a hideous McMansion and bitch about "the youths" constantly. My mum is nice actually but is too timid and will fall in line with my father instantly.

I feel bad about complaining because they're not like, abusive or cruel or anything but God it sucks. I get really envious whenever I see my friends and their families, they love each other and enjoy being together. I feel warm inside just being around that and experiencing it second hand.

[Anonymous No.13622529]

>>13622383
do you live with them?
if you do you should get out go live alone or with friends, idk what your family's like exactly but you might like them more if you don't see them constantly and you'll get exposed to how everybody has things to dislike about them.

[Anonymous No.13622713]

I'm the magnet of depression
It's harder to lift them off than their original weight

[Anonymous No.13622719]

every time i go outside i feel like i involuntarily put on a facade to interact with people and i hate it. i feel like i'm intruding in a place i don't belong, like i'm a spy or engaged in some kind of experiment to see if i can integrate myself among people.
i'm good at it because people think i'm nice and friendly and they're happy to talk to me but after a few weeks interacting with the same people it's obvious there's no substance behind it.
to make matters worse being in social situations is absolutely exhausting and if i have to do it for too long i get really bad headaches.
i don't feel loneliness and i don't feel depressed. on the contrary i absolutely RELISH the time i spend with myself indulging in my creative hobbies. i'm pretty sure i'm not a psychopath because i have empathy and i'm good at working out people's intentions and feelings. i just don't care. i once saw a woman fall down ~20 stairs and break her leg. i didn't feel anything but i asked her if she was okay to be polite then left when other people showed up so i wouldn't be inconvenienced by having to call or wait for an ambulance.

[Anonymous No.13622812]

>>13622245
I left my notebook at my friends house but every day as I wake up I spend around half an hour on a poem. Honestly I prefer writing prose to poems, but people in general seem to prefer the poems. I know I didn't show you a poem, but please understand it's nothing personal...

[Anonymous No.13623055]

I hate not being a good writer. Sometimes I get feelings of despair or heavyheartedness and all I want is to spill them out on the page with powerful, impactful language, but I can't. Today I got the same feeling and started thinking of ways I could express it but I found nothing so I just sat there staring into the distance, letting the despair take form and settle into me. It was kind of like an acceptance, I just let everything go and shifted all of my focus on the feeling.

Anyway what the fuck do I know I'm just a fucking lunatic. My nails hurt perpetually because I bite them too much. They look deformed and ugly. My room is a literal pigsty I just opened the bin not long ago and saw a rotting yogurt pot with black mould that I probably hadn't cleaned out for months. There are like 3 separate spider webs on my ceiling. Sometimes I get spurts of productivity where I end up cleaning my room and feeling generally better about myself but these occur far too infrequently to have any positive effect. Besides, in those periods I usually end up biting my nails until they bleed and I become overwhelmed with this hyperactive jittery feeling.

[Anonymous No.13623147]

How do I find good work life balance? Is over specialization, name getting a PhD an awful move? How do I control my ego when it comes to work?

[Anonymous No.13623266]

At 16 I was on my way to having a perfectly normal social life with a couple of friends any many acquaintances from school. That was about when people started going out to drink and organising smaller parties that lasted until around midnight.

When I was little my mom and dad wouldn't let me sleep over at a friend who lived one floor up (scared his brothers will get me drunk). They also wouldn't let me go behind our commie block cause I couldn't be seen from kitchen. In teenage years my parents always made me get back home at 9 pm tops and would scrupulously check my breath to see if I drank as much as one beer. If I did I was grounded and made tell how I got the alcohol. I was never allowed to go to any New Year's Eve party or anything similar because "I'd get hurt".

I'm khv without friends, girlfriend, anyone to talk to. I've failed college 3 years in a row and when I was doing a part-time job people constantly talked behind my back and put blame for everything on me.

Give me one reason not to kill myself.

[Anonymous No.13623281]

>>13623055
Take a break from 4chan and read Kirkegaard brother, I really relate to this story and genuinely Kirkegaard was a turning point ot help me out of my dispair. Your writing style is nice to read and I like the rhythm. Please don't give up <3

[Anonymous No.13623294]

>>13623266
>Give me one reason not to kill myself.
You havent read Epictetus' Discourses yet.

Work on yourself man. Not to get other people to admire you, but to admire yourself.

[Anonymous No.13623319]

>>13623055
>Today I got the same feeling and started thinking of ways I could express it but I found nothing
I always imagine talking to a friend. I write like I would talk in conversation. Do whatever it takes to keep writing.

[Anonymous No.13623470]

>>13623281
What works of his do you recommend?

[Anonymous No.13623984]

>>13623266
I had no friends beyond people I would talk to in class for years but now I've managed to get a few real friends I'll hang out with, do activities with, etc. I don't have a gf but I've learned to be more comfortable around girls and even get complimented by them from time to time, which is nice. I know what you mean about stagnating behind your peers and not experiencing your adolescence properly but you can still change things for the better.

[Anonymous No.13624418]

>>13623266
because there is an incredible amount of life for you to still experience my friend.

Hold on and remember how great thinks once where and believe in yourself so that you can get back to that feeling my friend.

List out your problems, start small and strategically try fixing them my friend. Work out, work on your diet, buy new clothes, build yourself up into the person you want to be. If talking to people is hard for you try starting very small, talk to old people about the weather if you can handle that and then move up my friend. Right down goals, try joining a club of anything that you enjoy.

I believe in you anon, you need to believe in yourself.

[Anonymous No.13624504]

>>13616826
I chose not to sleep with a girl yesterday because I knew it was a bad idea but now I can't stop thinking about sex
I will not hold back again

[Anonymous No.13624544]

>>13622284
its weirder than acknowledging your other coworkers and not her. just do it.

[Anonymous No.13624552]

>>13623266
those are very weak reasons to kys

[Anonymous No.13624656]

I just connected the dots and realized that the girl on the cover of Plastic Love is Junko Furuta a.k.a cement girl. Now that song is a lot more sinister and morbid in hindsight

[Anonymous No.13624750]

It's been months since I've written anything and I just don't feel the urge to do it anymore. I still have exactly as much need to write in order to accomplish my life goals, but for some reason I'm just apathetic. I have nothing driving me to put words down

[Anonymous No.13624771]

Just got rejected for the 5th time in a row. Any book recs for this feel?

[Anonymous No.13624786]

Why don’t people in wheel chairs ever spread their disabled legs? Don’t they understand power posture?

[Anonymous No.13624793]

>>13624656
Isn’t that the girl who got raped by the yakuza? I remember that as one of the only two wikipedia articles I fapped to

[Anonymous No.13624795]

>>13624771
Stop viewing books as the solution to your problems

[Anonymous No.13624982]

How do you stop procrastinating on something that takes an enormous amount of time and has no deadline but that you really want to get done?

[Anonymous No.13625039]

I’ve become rather suicidal again after a year of relative calm. Life’s slid back into a meaningless pit of despair, lacking most forms of enjoyment save for whatever I force myself to do in order to bring about the chemicals in my brain that prod it to continue its momentary existence. Lately, I’ve just grown tired of it all, again. Having friends would help, finding another gf would be fine too, but my physical location prevents most of it. The counterside is that my physical location is what brings about most of my happiness, as opposed to before when I resided in an urban environment.

Reality is a cruel bitch who never truly leaves. You can only escape to fantasy and obsessions for a short while before the real comes crashing through to fuck everything you’ve attempted to build. Idk, I really don’t want to die, but living isn’t that enjoyable anymore.

[Anonymous No.13625048]

>>13624795
are you autistic

[Anonymous No.13625498]

>>13621421
Seems interesting, keep working hard

[Anonymous No.13625499]

ass

[Anonymous No.13625791]

>>13624544
If it's that weird how come she doesn't initiate?

Also I guess I wasn't fully truthful. There are a few other people I don't talk to, but those people I've never seen say a word to anyone other than a customer.

[Anonymous No.13625981]

Im working on a book and im terrified of it getting rejected by publishers
I love my characters and want to do them justice by writing them well so they'll get accepted and their story will be read by others

[Anonymous No.13626081]

>>13623266
Stop being a spiteful faggot, learn to kayak or some shit
If you had the balls to off yourself for reasons like that you'd have the balls to do something interesting

[Anonymous No.13626100]

>>13616826
I want my life to be better, but I was raised to be entirely average in every way. Going out of my way to be unique physically or socially is troubling to my mind, and that's the only thing about me that isn't normal. I don't like to think how other people do, and because of that I don't really get along with other people, leading me to a possible lonely existence. I genuinely don't understand people in any way and most likely won't be able to conform by the time everyone else will be settling down and having a solid and intimate family life.

[Anonymous No.13626101]

I am torn between stillness and action. In stillness, there is no wanting to do anything, just to remain and exist. In action, I already know what I kind of like to pursue and how to make possible the life I've always wanted. When wanting clashes with not wanting. It is hard after an "ego-death" to once again want. One foot here, other foot there. Not moving and yet not fulfilled. Staying in the limbo until nothing changes. Not asking what's the point, because that question was never really interesting to begin with.

[Anonymous No.13626273]

>>13621765
Yeah I agree. I read it at night before I go to bed, always makes me feel content with what I have and helps to keep the bad thoughts away.

[Anonymous No.13626853]

I find myself lost in a stack of unfinished to-dos.
I must pump gas into my car.
I must look for a job.
I must choose a carreer.
I must buy cocoa butter.
I must exercise.
I must be going crazy because of my procrastination.
I must make a new debit card and ensure that no one used money from the other card.
I must buy clothes. Done properly, a solid wardrobe will develop.
I must express myself. If I don't, my thoughts consume me.
In my mind, a rumbling disorder occurs occasionally. It takes over the way I act. Helplessness ensues. But I shake it off with hedonism and promises of a life free of worry. Inconceivable, isn't it?

[Anonymous No.13626950]

I had a horrible dream last night, maybe some of you amateur psychoanalysts can tell me what it means.

I was standing in the middle of a highway with a group of criminals I was involved with somehow. There had been an accident and the road was completely blocked off. I got the sense that the criminals had been involved in the accident and were trying to cover up the evidence. Men from the group were going through the debris, removing some objects and rearranging others to look more innocuous. I was supervising this work, but I didn't understand what had happened or what the men were trying to hide. After a while one of the criminals told me that the work was done, and all of us got into a van and drove away from the wreckage. The driver got off at the first exit, parked the van on the ramp, and told us we would have to proceed on foot.
We were in a thick forest and the road ahead quickly turned into a rough and uneven trail running parallel to the highway, which in turn became more and more overgrown and crumbling. After some walking we came across a long line of nervous-looking women waiting to walk onto the highway, which at this point had the appearance of a rusty old railroad bridge. The rest of the group ignored these women and continued past them, but I stopped. I got the feeling that the women were afraid to go onto the highway because of the accident we had caused, and felt bad for them. I approached the first woman in line, and tried to tell her that the road had been cleared and that there was nothing to be afraid of. She became upset and told me that it wasn't my decision to make, and that she and the other women had already agreed to wait here a while longer. The rest of them clearly felt the same way and glared at me, so I left to rejoin the group of criminals.

(1/2)

[Anonymous No.13626957]

>>13626950

When I caught up with them, one of the criminals spotted me and became angry at me for abandoning them. He charged at me and we began to fight, nearly rolling off the trail before the rest of the group was able to split us up. It was getting dark, and some members of the group started to sing and dance as we moved on. We eventually turned off the path and went through the woods for a while before coming across an abandoned power plant. At this point we were all dancing and singing wildly, as if we were insane. We broke into the plant and began smashing and destroying everything in sight. Me and a few others separated from the rest of the group and went further into the building, eventually reaching an office complex where the plant administrators had once worked. One of the men produced a boombox and started playing harsh electronic music, while another lit a joint and started passing it around. I danced around with the others for a while, but eventually noticed a dark room off to the side and went to investigate. As soon as I was out of sight of the others, there was a great commotion throughout the plant. Lights flickered and went out, people started running and yelling, air raid sirens started up outside, and I could hear the sounds of someone banging on the walls. The music in the other room stopped, and I could hear the criminals laughing and chanting as they ran into the woods. "The golden calf! The golden calf! The golden calf!" I was terrified and ran to grab my belongings and leave, but the floor of the room collapsed and I fell. Then I woke up.

What struck me about this dream was how coherent it felt, like a dream sequence in a movie. I've never had a dream with such a clearly defined beginning, middle, and end. I have some ideas about what it might mean, but I'm also interested to see what other people think.

[Anonymous No.13627884]

I stopped living vicariously through fictional characters. Depression cured!