The Material Pride of Christians

[Anonymous No.13191938]

Is there any greater hubris than Christianity? Besides thinking that a god would give a fuck about you lowly mortals, you get up and spend about three hours getting ready to spend the day entirely within His gaze. Curling your fine locks; slowly inching on exquisite leggings; plucking away at the unsightly; adorning an intricately sewn and soft pair of felt shoes so that the earth remains undisturbed by your fleeing feet; closing yourself within layer upon layer of corsets and featherings to keep all forces and elements at bay while attracting the fancy of the piercing eyes of the world; spritzing your skin and hair with the eternal glaze of a prism; a second layer of leggings and tights to show off your gleamingly placid contours in relaxed poses; a wide-brimmed hat with the sweeping peacock lines of the ethereal; and finally a veiled nightshirt to keep any remaining inclement weather from betraying your fair skin, and especially adding the gravity of the world to those bouncing curls.

Yes. Yes. You are so fine and beholden to the heavens, an earthen vessel which G-d would love to take in his kind hands, kissing you gently. He will slowly remove all those layers of linen and silk, revealing the blossoming curves of you, the Virtuous Man. A spider woven into His web. And once naked in the light beyond this cursed earth He will ravage your gentle body without making you feel like a whore.

He will even watch as you spend another three hours piecing together your assemblage of the finest knitwear, just waiting for that gentle jiggling of the buttocks as you tighten your corset. As you gracefully walk away He will drape your curtain over your pallid shoulders; for You are the Veil of Maya and Logos.

[Anonymous No.13191944]

Nice try, Satan.

[Anonymous No.13192055]

We know God only cared about the children of Israel, and then gave up on them 2000 years ago. He probably has a new hobby planet that is going much better.

[Anonymous No.13192096]

>>13192055
How do they dress?

[Anonymous No.13192109]

>>13191938
>Is there any greater hubris than Christianity? Besides thinking that a god would give a fuck about you lowly mortals

Yes, that's the point. Magnanimity's name is Jesus,

[Anonymous No.13192146]

>>13191938
you take that back or i will dress fancy right now.

[Anonymous No.13192237]

>>13192146
Can I remove your garter and toss it to the masses crying out for salvation?

[Anonymous No.13192238]

>>13192096
Ideally, they don't. The proper species would never have gained the knowledge of good and evil.

[Anonymous No.13192355]

1 Six days before the Passover celebration began, Jesus arrived in Bethany, the home of Lazarus—the man he had raised from the dead. 2 A dinner was prepared in Jesus’ honor. Martha served, and Lazarus was among those who ate[a] with him. 3 Then Mary took a twelve-ounce jar[b] of expensive perfume made from essence of nard, and she anointed Jesus’ feet with it, wiping his feet with her hair. The house was filled with the fragrance.

4 But Judas Iscariot, the disciple who would soon betray him, said, 5 “That perfume was worth a year’s wages.[c] It should have been sold and the money given to the poor.” 6 Not that he cared for the poor—he was a thief, and since he was in charge of the disciples’ money, he often stole some for himself.

7 Jesus replied, “Leave her alone. She did this in preparation for my burial. 8 You will always have the poor among you, but you will not always have me.”

[Anonymous No.13192370]

>>13191938
Invidious. But hold steady to your abstract bric-a-brac, moron.

[Anonymous No.13192735]

>>13192355
jesus speaking the truth as always.

[Anonymous No.13192827]

>>13192355
what an arrogant dick

[Anonymous No.13192831]

>>13191944
Good job Paul, you stopped the pagan.

[Anonymous No.13193463]

>>13192355
Didn't seem to work out for him.

[Anonymous No.13195108]

>>13193463
>died
>rose again on the third day
>ascended into heaven
>seated at the right hand of the father

Seems like it worked out fine

[Anonymous No.13195245]

>>13195108
>and he will come again in glory to judge the living and the dead, and his kingdom shall have no end, amen