/lit/ - Literature

[Anonymous No.11775628]

Has /lit/ ever gotten you laid? I invited a girl from church over and I read her selections from the Moral Essays. Needless to say I took her anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11775637]

>>11775628
Bareback? Creampie? Details pls.

[Anonymous No.11775661]

>>11775628
i used to read in bars and girls would come up to me and start talking. i think the book was just a pretext though, they never actually wanted to talk about lit

[Anonymous No.11775671]

>>11775637
Yeah fucked her standing up and came in her asshole. Also made her lick mine afterwards just for the hell of it.

[Anonymous No.11775677]

>>11775628
>be me, first year lit doctoral student at an ivy
>first class is Narrative Voices in Austen
>6.5 brunette qt takes the seat next to me
>ofuck.jpg
>mumble a hello and stick out my hand like a boomer
>she tentatively shakes and introduces herself. she's very sweet
>prof asks us what our favorite austen novels are
>ofuck.jpg
>say emma because it's the only one I can think of besides pride and prejudice
>qt says Mansfield Park
>class passes slowly, prof won't shut up about transatlanticity and theories of emergent colonialism
>time to leave, qt asks me what I'm doing later
>don't answer, instead respond with "I bet you'd like a man to feel your park"
Needless to say I took her anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11775683]

>having sex outside of marriage

[Anonymous No.11775684]

I'm never going to get laid. I can't imagine it ever happening

[Anonymous No.11775690]

>>11775628
Once I ran into an old college friend at barnes and noble. We started browsing in the philosophy section and I read her selections from Either/Or. Needless to say I didn't take her anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11775715]

Once i was reading in the train and a girl approached me asking what i was reading. I showed her my copy of The Enneads and started talking about the One and Forms. Needless to say i took her anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11775741]

>>11775683
Chaste and breadpilled

[Anonymous No.11775797]

>>11775628
Once I was in a park reading Lord of Rings - The Fellowship of the Ring when a qt appeared and asked what I was reading. I said what it was and immediately asked if I could put my "fellowship" inside her "ring" while pointing into my dick and her vagina. Needless to say i took her anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11775810]

>>11775628
Once I was reading Burroughs's 'The Soft Machine' in a public park in Portland when a semi-passable homeless tranny came up and sat down and asked what I was reading. Needless to say they took my anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11775816]

>>11775683
cringe and virginpilled

[Anonymous No.11775837]

>>11775628
Once I was reading the Song of Songs in my study when my wife walked into the room. She asked me to climb the palm tree and take hold of its fruit. Needless to say I came into her garden and ate its choicest fruits.

[Anonymous No.11775921]

I met my first real girlfriend in creative writing club in high school. Yes it was as cringey as it sounds. Needless to say I took her oral and vaginal but not anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11776149]

>>11775921
Ok anon, I believe everyone here was telling the truth.
Except you, you're a faggot

[Anonymous No.11776161]

>>11775837
Kek

[Anonymous No.11776191]

I bought a stack of books at a used book store today, including The Magic Mountain, Underworld, Blood Meridian, and Journey to the End of the Night, and the chick who rang my shit up was way cuter than I expected. I was probably more attracted to the shorter cashier with the more plump thighs and freckles on her face.

My debit card was declined, so I had to use a credit card. And I was wearing a suit, too, having just had a job interview, so I must have looked decidedly unhip. Joke's on them, I'd rather sniff the PVC ass of my Super Sonico figures anyway. ;_;

[Anonymous No.11776217]

>>11776191
That’s Satan fucking with your game my man. Whenever the dollar is involved, Satan is at work

[Anonymous No.11776224]

I was scared of my grade 12 English teacher. I missed lots of classes and had to frequently visit her at lunch or after school to catch up. Needless to say she took my anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11776233]

>>11776217
Wouldn't it be Mammon or something? Anyway, I'd forgotten to put a new card in my wallet and was using the previous, cancelled card like a retard. I think it's better that the qts at the store think I'm just a poorfag, rather than an idiot. Still can't go there for another few months, in order to forget my shame

[Anonymous No.11776237]

>>11775715
Did you do it on the train?

[Anonymous No.11776241]

>>11775810
Tell contrapoints that /lit/ says hello, even though I know she is here browsing this thread as I type this.

[Anonymous No.11776371]

>>11775628
A girl I'm college complemented me on my copy of Anti-Oedipus once. Needless to say I coupled my phallic-machine with her anal-machine to produce a semen-flow

[Anonymous No.11776602]

>>11775661
did you really? Did you at least do it in a dark corner or did you actually do it at the fucking bar?

I would never do that kind of thing

[Anonymous No.11778331]

>>11776602
I would do it mostly at this one bar that was pretty chill, and on weekday nights. There were other people reading in there, i wasnt being weird by reading.

BUt you had these swarms of thots that would pass through, mostly 18 year old girls, on some multi-bar quest for dick, that would sweep the situation for adequate fuck material and pick who they wanted.

[Anonymous No.11778922]

Once unironically had a qt approach me at a cafe because I was reading Infinite Jest. In a needless-to-say-but-in-a-totally-going-to-say-anyway-sort-of-sense, I eliminated her anal virginity’s map.

[Anonymous No.11778948]

>>11775628
Lost my virginity in freshman year to a senior qt blue haired commie I met when I got into a socialist circle in my uni (I wasnt a socialist anymore, just wanted to make some friends in my first days)

[Anonymous No.11778983]

>>11778948
it’s all good senpai, i’m a neocon and when i was in college i joined the young demsucc club to meet qt jewish girls and it was actually pretty good since I could talk the lingo from being on /lit/ as an underage faggot

[Anonymous No.11779749]

The bell jar got me laid

[Anonymous No.11780297]

>>11775628
The only specific book that has ever gotten me laid was Jack Donovan's The Way of Men. Yes, the intercourse was heterosexual.

I entered a months-long relationship with a black woman who was perusing the "ethnic" section of Barnes & Noble (which was located right next to the SF & Fantasy section).

I banged a Barnes & Noble clerk repeatedly while staying in a nearby hotel, but I met her buying a non-book item.

[Anonymous No.11780347]

I have not met one girl at uni that actively reads books or takes any interest in books. All the girls I've smashed were due to them finding me mysterious. I hate it. I really want someone to have sex with me because of my interest in books, not because they find me generally interesting.

[Anonymous No.11780453]

>>11780297
Damn chad, how’d you pick the black girl up?

[Anonymous No.11781868]

>>11780453
bumping my fair question

[Anonymous No.11781898]

>>11775628
My ex literally started talking to me just because I had a book. She was a total pseud. Good sex and cute girl but she cheated on me a few months later with her ex. Shitty situation desu.

[Anonymous No.11781903]

>>11776241
>Implying hontrapoints isn't the one who made that post

[Anonymous No.11781923]

>>11775628
I learned the game originally from books, so by extension yes, but otherwise it depends on the person. One night stands? Nearly never. Consistent fuck buddies? Yes, it helps maintain the relationship.

[Anonymous No.11781945]

I once attended a punk-anarchist meeting at a bookshop. I traded a girl a copy of The Glass Castle I'd stolen for a copy of The Secret. Our thumbs touched when we traded. Needless to say, I took her anal virginity.

[Anonymous No.11781952]

>>11781898
are you of the opinion that once a cheater, always a cheater?

>>11781923
what books my good man?

[Anonymous No.11781968]

>>11781952
Well, I'd say it depends, but as for this girl, I wouldn't go back with her. I can't build that bond once more. I don't even find her attractive anymore.

But I think a woman can reform her ways. I've done a lot of stupid stuff in the past and I wouldn't want to be judged for it because I think we undergo ontological change with time so it's enough to say I'm not who I was five years ago except causally. So I think a woman could be better with some profound realization. But I think this is more rare than we think. Most people change only superficially.

[Anonymous No.11783072]

>>11781952
The game by neil strauss
The rational male is decent but very sexist so I don't recommend
Simple pickup is amazing on youtube

[Anonymous No.11783084]

>>11775677
...sgub

[Anonymous No.11783094]

Once a qt caught me reading GR on the subway. Needless to say, I am still a virgin.

[Anonymous No.11783131]

When my now-wife saw that I was reading Tristram Shandy, we—
* * * * * * *
* * * * * * *
and there was not a time better!

[Anonymous No.11783234]

>be me
>ANGRY DISGUSTING NAZI talking to other Nazis
>they are near a beautiful girl of colour
>"Hitler's autobiography is all the proof you need that transsexuals are scum. They are so incredibly Marxist yet break the roles society has assigned them to. Something that would cause any communist state to collapse. They're only purpose is to indoctrinate children and take them from their parents."
>walk up the stage
>get in the Nazi's face
>"Excuse me,you fucking pig. Are you really that oblivious to the suffering of people that are different from you? I suggest you read The Gender Games by Juno Dawson to educate yourself."
>everyone claps
Needless to say later that night I bedded the women mentioned previously. Aryan pussy is actually pretty good.

[Anonymous No.11783247]

>>11775628
>pre marital sex
To the trash it goes

[Anonymous No.11783262]

>>11783094
based

[Anonymous No.11783326]

>>11775837
kek'd. well done