Greentext the plot of whatever it is you're pretending to work on. Other anons give critique.

File: 68 KB, 640x427, lwkjenflsjendlkaend.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Anonymous Thu Sep 14 22:45:53 2017 No.10024996 [Reply] [Original]

Greentext the plot of whatever it is you're pretending to work on.
Other anons give critique.

Anonymous Thu Sep 14 22:59:30 2017 No.10025064

I'll start.

>Dude leaves society because he thinks it's going to shit. Sees how the environment is being destroyed and it upsets him, etc, etc
>Sells everything, buys a plot of rural land.
>Builds a shelter, farms, starts lopping trees and hunting
>Over the course of time, the fish in his river get smaller and smaller. He has to travel further and further to get wood.
>Rabbits are all gone, because he hunted them to oblivion.
>Soon nearly all the trees are gone. He can't grow food for shit, relies more and more on hunting.
>He can't go without food for long, refuses to not have a fire.
>Realises that his habits from living in society have carried over and are unsustainable.
>Has a fit, struggles to change his ways. Maybe he dies.

Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:07:44 2017 No.10025102

>Criminal in college
>Really good at using a student organization to run a criminal network
>Has his own workforce because he's ultimately lazy
>Decides to do a fraternity prank
>It starts a petty but increasingly dangerous frat war
>He accidentally kills some people and frames a serial killer on his pay role
>Uses his fuck ups to take care of old business (eliminate competition)
>Returns to school after a drug fueled nervous breakdown and decides to lay back for the rest of the year
>Some shit about expression, perception, boredom and advertising

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:09:04 2017 No.10025107 >>10025064 How could one person ruin an ecoystem that badly? Is this about excess or is he just awful at choosing a place to live and its a farce?

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:11:27 2017 No.10025114 File: 130 KB, 500x334, Taking-notes.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >Me in this thread Thanks, fucktards

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:12:47 2017 No.10025118 >>10025114 >not posting an earlier version of your plot so if it's stolen you can always capitalize on the better version and then prove it was stolen, doubly fucking ovee the thief How new are you?

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:13:49 2017 No.10025124 A rope, a man, and a ceiling fan.

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:17:07 2017 No.10025136 >>10025114 >Implying that a couple lines of greentext is enough to write a novel off. Also >Implying anyone can be bothered writing someone else's idea

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:17:56 2017 No.10025141 >>10025118 >Implying you can bring me to court in my country You probably don't even speak my language (Less than 1% of the world does)

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:40:20 2017 No.10025230 >>10025141 Touche but >>10025136

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:41:41 2017 No.10025240 >>10025230 >>10025136 >Not being able to write a novel off a single sentence You're never going to make it in the business if you can't work off prompts.

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:43:12 2017 No.10025249 >>10025240 >implying any successful novel was 'discovered' via prompt

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:44:27 2017 No.10025255 >>10025249 >implying my first published novel wasn't based off a prompt I pulled from tumblr And before you ask, no I won't link it, don't need to help you all track me down for the two ideas I've already stolen from this thread.

Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:50:06 2017 No.10025272

kinda loose for now
>dude is born with mysterious disease which causes him to feel no sensation at all, making him feel disconnected from the physical world
>starts an interest of metaphysical philosophy because of so
>best friend couldn't give less of a fuck
>slight interest in philosophy because of friend, but too much of a brainlet to understand the deeper meanings
>has substance abuse issues
>develops schizophrenia from smoking weed as a child
>feels intense dissociation a lot
>philosophy friend tries to help him with his issues but he doesnt want any help
>his life is going into a downward spiral and frustrates his friend which distracts him from studying
>eventually philosophy friend fucking loses it and "euthanizes" his friend who was basically dead already
>immediately after realizing what he's done, he feels an intense burning in his body and mind
>lays his hand on his dead friend's body and can actually feel things now
>some cain and abel allegory
>some shit about self-destruction, alienation, and internal ethical argument

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:50:55 2017 No.10025275 >>10025240 if you're able to write an entire novel from a few lines of greentext, you deserve the credit for it.

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 14 23:52:47 2017 No.10025282 >>10025255 clever girl

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 00:10:20 2017 No.10025342 >>10025107 I assume it wouldn't be impossible for one dude to ruin such a small ecosystem over the course of a couple of years. I'm not talking huge swathes of forests, I'm talking like 200 acres or so.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 00:13:43 2017 No.10025360 >>10025342 I feel like you're severely underestimating nature if you're only talking about a couple of years

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 00:15:23 2017 No.10025370

>>10025255

I wrote a story based off of a prompt a while back that garnered me somewhere in the range of $400. It was only ~100,000 words, but was completely devoid of any literary merit and was centred around a gimmick in the prompt.

I'm not saying the same is the case with your stuff, but I feel like there's little literary merit in these kinds of stories.

Besides don't you write for the enjoyment of it? To get your own thoughts out there? I'd find little fun in ripping some anon's ideas compared to making my own.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 00:16:26 2017 No.10025373 >>10025360 Perhaps. I'll have to do some more research I guess. Cheers.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 00:19:53 2017 No.10025385 >>10025370 >only 100k words Nigga thats a lot of fuckin words

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 00:36:57 2017 No.10025438 >>10025272 Interesting, but I imagine it'd be a bitch to write someone who can't feel shit. Can people like that even function at all if they have no feelings from birth? I don't know. It'd be a feat if you could pull it off.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 00:43:27 2017 No.10025455

>>10025438
i'd call the idea kafkaesque but it would probably be more kafkaesque if he just lost all his sensation randomly one day
people who are born blind function better with their disability than someone who becomes blind later in life
i would imagine someone born without sensation just gets accustomed to it and figures out how to function a normal (yet very limited in stimuli) life

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 01:00:21 2017 No.10025493

Alright, lay it on me
>Legislative debates about the medical field tampering into transhumanism and human dignity favours the side of genetic engineering
>Government and medical board then support and conduct mass research in the field of biotechnology
>Depressive, hypocritical and indecisive MC who is a scientist specialising in stated field has produced the 'miracle' drug that stops the ageing process of the user and thus grants him 'immortality'.
>MC has ulterior motives of fixing up his life due to bad life decisions and feels pressured since he is a middle-aged now in the given time.
>Steals the drug, run aways from the facility, maybe burn it down, escapes and lives under the government's radar for decades to come
>The story kicks in after years have passed after the incident, maybe around 50-500 years, where he realizes that after his shenanigans, he makes more mistakes than he could resolve and thus feels hopeless and broken
>Then realizes that no one should live this life and thus commits to serving only one purpose: to stop the replication of the drug.

I know, there are so many questions about this, but I don't know about this story.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 02:56:07 2017 No.10025747

>MC yarn #1: MC1 Male soldier summoned to his commanding officer's tent, is charged with serious crime of treason.
>MC1 flees, jumps into river, gets washed out to sea
>nearly drowns, is fished out by MC7, a spy working against MC1's country, Country A
>MC7 drops MC1 off at Country A
>MC1 returns home, finds it burned down, kills off a couple of men, eventually finds his younger brother and sister.
>MC1 learns from them that their gov't is looking for some lost scrolls some ancestor of his wrote. Realizes that his distant relatives live in country B, which recently broke off from country A, and that he needs to get there to save them.
>MC1 chases the remaining gov't agent to another port city.
>MC1 sneaks into domestic transport ship the agent is boarding. It's carrying a squadron of gov't agents. Ship is uncoincidentally heading to country B.
>MC1 lands there, takes note of the gov't agents coming out. MC1 attacks, chaos erupts.
>Remaining agents flee back to country A.
>Country A declares war on Country B, where MC1 is living in. Meanwhile, MC1 spends the next few months moving from relative's house to relative's house, searching, and warning them of danger, all while living off of manual labor monies.
>MC1 finds the scrolls that Country A is looking for.
>MC1's current place eventually ambushed by agents, because it is home of some of his distant relatives. Everyone of these relatives die except for MC1 and one of the children, who flee in the middle of all-out war.
>But MC1 was poisoned during the attack.
>MC1 and boy hide in boy's friend's house some miles up.
>They smuggle them both to Country C, another chunk of civilization currently rebelling from Country A.
>the new leader of this country was actually an official who had intel on Country A's king, so he knows about Country A's king's hunt for MC1. He knows MC1's story.
>MC1 learns that he is the reason why Country A went to war with Country B. Hence, he is also the important factor in enabling Country C and Country D to successfully break off from Country A. He is praised for this.
>MC1 is awarded chance to retrieve his siblings from Country A.
>MC1's war party rescue siblings, they are chased by Country A forces through mountains and into Country D.
>MC1 and co. board another ship there, embark for Country C. But the king of Country D realizes who MC1 is, sends Stealthy Bad Guy to snatch his scrolls back.
>So, Stealthy BG boards the ship.
>Eventually SBG fights MC1, but the crew subdue him.
>SBG tells everyone that he works for king of Country D, the crew hesitate, but in the end they think he's full of shit and take MC1's side.
>However, the guy navigating the ship is secretly on SBG's side, recognizing him. He secretly steers the ship back to Country D's port.
>MC1 realizes they're heading back, so he subdues the navigator.
>No other person capable of navigating the ship, MC1 tries to navigate everyone to country C.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 02:57:15 2017 No.10025748

>>10025747
(cont.)
>They end up all the way in a vast, barbaric wilderness, where Country A constantly runs its armies as cannon fodder against barbaric
Country E and F, and another Imperial Country G, who also are all at war with Demonic Horde. This is a four-sided war, where it's Country A vs. Demons vs. Country E-F-&angels-&CountryG. This is a another continent, the same one where MC1's story first began, but it's in a different part of it.
and this is just yarn/pov #1

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 02:58:22 2017 No.10025750 >>10025748 I messed up my greentext. Oh well.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 03:12:59 2017 No.10025788 >>10025114 I'd be so fuckin touched if someone stole my plot.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 03:38:35 2017 No.10025850
File: 10 KB, 213x160, citymaze.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>Man in city showing friend his manuscript
>Friend hates on manuscript, man is upset, gets lost in city
>Overwhelmed by crowds, he ducks into a vacant alley occupied by a mute homeless man
>Asks for directions without success, bum looks at the passing crowd, then down the alley, then up to him
>Decides to go down alley in hopes of avoiding crowds and finding somewhere familiar
>Alley turns into a high walled maze

Don't know where to go from here, man could pursue maze and leave pages of his shitty manuscript as a literal paper trail, maybe.
I'm fairly happy with what I have so far and I will post what I have by the end of the night if you guys can help me out with the plot

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 03:55:04 2017 No.10025878 >>10025124 Underrated post, 9/10 genuinely kek'd

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 05:30:10 2017 No.10026044 >>10025141 So why would I care if you steal my idea if no one is going to read it anyway, not in your illiterate third world country let alone in America?

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 05:56:22 2017 No.10026085

>Political dystopia
>Imagine an American Dictator on the level of Hitler or Stalin
>Imagine that dictator being a woman
>Themes include the dark side of feminity and the political psyche in America
>Narrated by Psychology professor in the political gulag It's based on JPB
>It is essentially the decline and fall of the roman empire but with a fictitious America

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 06:02:50 2017 No.10026093 File: 53 KB, 564x682, c0088e47577bd2f9fbfdf640fd55fe4e.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10026085 Genuine kek.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 06:25:28 2017 No.10026121 >>10025850 Fucked up versions of whatever is in each dropped page of the manuscript materialize in the maze

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 10:47:26 2017 No.10026840 >>10025064 One does not simply hunt rabbits to oblivion.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 10:57:16 2017 No.10026873 >>10025342 Also one hactare (2.5 acres) of forest yields about 300 to 1000 cubic meters of firewood.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 11:10:43 2017 No.10026913 >>10026085 Kek omg. This is awesome.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 12:24:25 2017 No.10027184 >>10026085 This is going to be a bestseller when it comes out

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 12:25:23 2017 No.10027187 >>10027184 Well the moron market is a fruitful one.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 12:25:54 2017 No.10027191 >>10025064 bugs.. easy on the depopulation

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 13:35:03 2017 No.10027439

>>10025064
Not very interesting and even less realistic.
>>10025102
Over the top and feels anime-ish but intriguing for sure.
>>10025114
Do you seriously think you're going to achieve shit when you can't come up with ideas?
>>10025124
Platonic romances, how risqué!
>>10025272
>which causes him to feel no sensation at all
Sounds like your average 4channer autofellatio but with a semi interesting twist, that'll make it even harder to pull off well.
>>10025493
>I don't know about this story.
Yeah...
>>10025747
>>10025748
Too much detail, too few reasons to care ... and reads like a vidya plot.
>>10025850
Not too bad with potential for something really cool.
>>10026121
Decent suggestion.
>>10026085
Can be decent if you don't sperg out pushing your own beliefs and opinions too hard.

Come on /lit/, you can do better.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 13:40:45 2017 No.10027459 >>10027439 >Do you seriously think you're going to achieve shit when you can't come up with ideas? Worked for most writers on the List.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 13:45:04 2017 No.10027483

>>10024996
I've got a few
>5 year old boy invents an imaginary friend
>first person narrative from the perspective of the imaginary friend
>13 years later he still has the same imaginary friend
>that he takes very seriously
>parents have sent him to a half dozen psychiatrists and therapists
>none of it works
>most of the story is just an exposition on how childlike imaginations and daydreaming work
>not sure how to end it but it might end with his parents taking the kid to some kind of mystic who invents an imaginary assassin to kill the narrator in a chase-sequence that will hopefully be reminiscent of the Quilty chase scene in Lolita
Another one that's just an idea, and I don't think I'm good enough to write it, so feel free to steal it:
>takes place in hell
>but no one can remember the sins they committed that damned them
>psychogical detective story where the protag tries to deduce the cause of his damnation

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 13:46:30 2017 No.10027489

>>10027459
Where did you get that idea? Just because their shit is cliche painting by numbers stuff, doesn't mean they didn't came up with it, after going through hundreds of other unoriginal but their own ideas. Coming up with SOMETHING is too fundamental for writing, and affects the entire thing. Someone struggling with that, won't make it.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 13:47:45 2017 No.10027498 >>10025373 Read Walden. Also look at cases where survivalists failed. One guy in Alaska went off into the woods to live by himself off of nature. He killed an elk but the meat spoiled, and on the way back to civilization he drowned in the river.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 13:57:40 2017 No.10027534 >>10027439 Hey reviewbrah, what do you think about mine>>10027483

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 14:41:54 2017 No.10027677

>>10027439
Look you shitdick, this isn't Randy Rates plot greentext thread, we don't need your goddamn opinion on

every fucking post. Do you walk into grocery stores and start rating the produce? Well, shit

this apple's a bit browner than the other, I don't understand this cucumber, that's the best

fucking grapefruit I've ever seen. No, you don't do that. So why the fuck do you think we need

you to analyze every fucking post someone puts up? If I ever see some retard rating asparagus

I'm going to walk right up to him and kick him in the dick, because I know with confidence it

will be you

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 14:45:48 2017 No.10027692

>>10027534
First one is pretty cute and got quite the potential, I feel a bit biased because I really like the themes and because the presentation itself is very well done, instantly opening up floodgates for all the fun things one could do with the concept. Ending sounds ... decent, although somewhat anticlimactic.

Second one is potentially interesting, just too underdeveloped to comment further.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 15:01:35 2017 No.10027734

>>10027677
How did you arrive to the idea that there is even a remote possibility that your needs are of any interest for me, anon? It's fun rating stuff. If some anon gets encouraged by feedback, it's just a little bonus enjoyment. As are the anons who get triggered. If feedback is an issue for someone, they shouldn't publish their stuff for others to see.

Also, there are no good grapefruits. I don't get how people can enjoy that shit.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 15:08:24 2017 No.10027757 >snake alien crawls up man's ass while asleep >man slowly turns into giant female snake >lays eggs >struggles to survive and keep eggs safe

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 15:41:51 2017 No.10027891

A short story collection.

>winter, European city I live in
>popular area associated with bars and clubs and art galleries
>a table is reserved in a bar. It has been reserved for the same person every night, for years
>sometimes he comes, sometimes he doesn't
>a curious young writer keeps going to the bar to check if the man is there
>finally meets him
>they talk
>man finds out young dude is a writer
>ptsd.jpg
>Man slowly opens up, says he used to be a writer too
>hasn't written in years, young dude asks why
>will tell more to the young dude during the course of a few weeks at the reserved table, drinking through it as he opens up
>each story he tells is a short story obviously

This is the general idea.

What is it about/notes:
>man's youth
>man's first existential crisis
>man's depression that doesn't fade through the years, explains his views
>man living the bohemian literary life
>he finds the bar and the table with his friends in this stage, frequents ever since
>First time man is published (he's still relatively unknown and forgotten by the time he meets young dude)
>man finds love and settles down with poet who's also depressed
>their years together, struggling but as happy as it can be given muh depression
>She can't take it anymore and commits suicide
>man can't write anymore
>he keeps going back to the bar
>that's how he meets young dude
>concludes his story with a monologue that sums up his mentality through the years
>"that's a beautiful story"
>"write it then. I won't. It's yours"
>says goodbye to the young dude
>man drowns himself in the river of the city
>table is still reserved for weeks, no one realizes he won't come back
>then they do and the young dude "takes his place"
>him and his friends are the new "generation"
>hint at young dudes own depression and similar fate
>short story collection was actually written by young dude, based on what the man told him

It's loosely based on the notebooks I kept from 17 to 24. Some stories are lighthearted, some are heavier.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:09:44 2017 No.10027993 >>10027891 Too bourgeois. Poets struggling in Europe and writing about being cosmopolitan is something that's been done for over a hundred years now

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:15:26 2017 No.10028005

>when you go to bed tonight you will hear a strange sound
>you will look around, not knowing where it came from
>after thinking it was just a nonthreatening noise or your imagination you will try and go to sleep
>as you feel your eyelids getting heavy and the world growing darker you hear the strange sound again
>you jolt up, desperately looking left and right
>you don't see anything
>your chest pounding and your body trembling, you say to yourself: "just a dream, just a dream"
>despite saying this you go over and turn the light on, before getting back into bed
>you're drifting off to sleep again
>you dream of beautiful women and wonderful adventures
>you awake burning in agony
>a masked lunatic is on top of you, strangling you to death
>your eyes bulge as you try and remove the villain
>your arms drop, everything fades into eternal darkness

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:22:26 2017 No.10028021 >>10027891 Sounds neat, maybe not as a collection though.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:38:55 2017 No.10028066

>man comes home to work to find his wife in bed
>Bleeding, naked, and dead , blood seeming to have gushed from vagina
>She was raped, and suffered so much internal trauma that she bled to death from the act itself
>He's a photographer, and he loves the scene so much that instead of helping her or calling an ambulance , he takes photos of the gorgeous moment
>Is taken aback by the lifelessness of the corpse
>After a few photo sessions, he begins making love with the corpse to feel how it must've been to be the rapist and watch his wife die
>Finishes up
>Leaves her be, and develops the photos
>Leaves corpse right where it is , video taping it's decay.
>One week later, after reviewing the tapes, he sees that there is a man repeatedly looking through the windows for 5-10 minutes every day at the same time
>It's him, the rapist
>He knows what the husband has been doing and is intrigued
>the husband eventually invites him in
>Asks him for a favor
>"Show me what it was like"
>Story ends with him being raped to death next to his wife's corpse
>"I'll see you soon, sweetheart, I'll see you soon"
Thoughts?

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:41:01 2017 No.10028073

>>10027993

Meh, worst that can happen is it gets rejected. You're perfectly right though. Most of acclaimed writers in my country got drunk and struggled on the exact same streets my friends and I did (and to some extent still do).

That's just how it is, and if I want to write something loosely based on my first hand experiences, I cannot hide it. It's bourgeois and overdone, but that's the nature of living the literary life -no matter if pseud as in our case or "authentic" as it was for those who came before- in my country.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:48:07 2017 No.10028092 >>10026085 Sounds like the preachy work of someone that read dystopian fiction too much as a teenager.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:50:50 2017 No.10028106 >>10028066 Jesus Christ, why are you trying so hard to be edgy?

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:51:37 2017 No.10028112 >>10028066 Edgy af

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 16:56:46 2017 No.10028136 >>10028106 >>10028112 Because edgy is exactly what I want it to be? The grotesque is not meant to be pleasant. Fucking plebians.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 17:03:21 2017 No.10028163 >man writes great plot for novel >it's breathtaking >posts it on 4chan >woman steals plot >woman becomes next rupi kaur

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 17:07:38 2017 No.10028176 >>10028163 That suggests that rupi was good at some point. You can't even string a thought together, what are you doing here?

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 17:13:00 2017 No.10028195 >>10028176 Not giving out good plots to be stolen, FBI.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 17:14:58 2017 No.10028202

>>10025493
Try this.

Go from a secondary character who meets this person. Start the story at that character's life-changing experience that pushes them together with your original MC. Over time make sure you leak in the hints at his history. Outdated mannerisms, intimate knowledge of historical events, constant desire to have said serum in a closed container on his/her person.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 17:17:59 2017 No.10028213 >>10028195 I highly doubt you have anything worthwhile. Though you can test me if yPu want to.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 17:37:45 2017 No.10028269 >>10028066 I agree that its edgy but it could also be really interesting depending on the execution

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 17:55:13 2017 No.10028319

>CEO of a Google type corporation has a mental break and is going to pull an Enron in 7 days.
>Various employees live life unaware of the fact that it is their last week of solvency.

I've actually posted most of the story so far in threads around lit.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 18:10:24 2017 No.10028374 >>10027439 >too few reasons to care are you talking about motives for characters, or motives for you to read it?

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 18:30:09 2017 No.10028438

>>10028374
Nah, the motives seem alright, just presented in a way that doesn't allow me to build any interest for it. Like, there was nothing striking about the situation, the goal or how MC1 deals with it all. Obviously greentext format is somewhat limiting for that, but hey, jus' sayin'.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 20:34:11 2017 No.10028881

>>10028269
I'm not going to be pulling a Tess D'Ubervilles where all the grotesque elements are left out of the novel but are implied to happen "off screen" in fact I somewhat want it to be the anti-thesis of that kind of that kind of horror, instead I want it to be as graphic and detailed as possible

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 20:45:34 2017 No.10028920

>Man and dog on a cross country journey.
>Wacky hijinks ensue
>Begins getting darker and less wacky the farther from civilization they go.
>Man decides to murder a homeless man he meets in the woods.
>Once they get back to more populated areas it starts to lighten up and become wacky again
>Turns out the man never existed and it was the dog the whole time.
>Dog lays down and dies in a back alley.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 20:49:24 2017 No.10028937 >>10028438 Oh, alright. Yes, the tone I used to present it was really crude. Maybe I should work on how I pitch things if I ever try going to a publisher or editor. Thanks anyways.

Anonymous Fri Sep 15 22:14:57 2017 No.10029269

>war on terror in a setting resembling the cold war era (with futuristic bits like much more advanced medicine)
>lighthearted tone edging on satire to balance out the bleak stuff
>told from multiple points of view (idealistic megalomaniac, pretentious artist, disillusioned triple agent, sociopathic heiress, naive refugee, and a chick who tries to be a decent human being, hence obviously dies in the middle)
>they cross paths, fuck each other over, fuck each other, and have long witty dialogues, sometimes while fucking or fucking each other over
>there are also lots of terrorism, gambling and bad decisions between the banter
>it's mostly about following big goals and sacrifices on the way (ambition vs love) and exploration of the nature of suffering/problem of evil, the joys of hypocrisy and playing around with perspective/subjectivity and obviously absurdism
>in the end it's revealed that the majority of the book was written by one of the characters, who might have or might not have had her hands in all of the happenings

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 22:16:34 2017 No.10029275 >>10024996 >man escapes zoo in a satirical feminist dystopia, finding refuge in a woman's house. Haven't really thought about it too much, but the woman might pity him? Change her worldview?

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 22:26:53 2017 No.10029302 >>10029275 Have some filler happen which leads up to this woman imprisoning him and treating him like he's her pet rabbit. Perhaps you can make it so that his desires gradually shift to wanting to go back to the zoo just to get away from her.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 22:28:58 2017 No.10029305 >>10024996 >guy wakes up with a mysterious plastic knob growing out of his head

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 15 22:30:09 2017 No.10029311 >An account of a man's suicide as told from the perspective of the noose.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 03:15:03 2017 No.10030138 >>10027439 >you can do better I can but the rest of these fucks don't have a chance

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 04:15:16 2017 No.10030264 >be me

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 09:08:52 2017 No.10030962

>Prologue starts with a character on jury duty attending a trial
>the one being trialed is a US whistleblower
>as things start to get more heated, a bomb goes off
>next chapter the protagonist of the novel who works in the police is assigned to the case
>investigates the debris and ruins of the courthouse
>everyone in the department is "convinced" it was a deliberate terrorist attempt
>protagonist thinks that's not the truth and begins to dwell deeper
>he comes across a "rabbit hole" of a conspiracy and becomes increasingly paranoid

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 09:09:21 2017 No.10030963 >>10029305 Based Gregory Berrycone

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 09:10:24 2017 No.10030966 >>10024996 >murder mystery where the perpetrator appears to be made up of the amputated parts of 14 different people

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 09:15:21 2017 No.10030975

>protag is a young lad who is bored of life and wants to do something interested
>is envious of other people who are wealthy and stuff
>proposes an idea to steal an invitation of a party
>turns out said party is for wealthy and influential people of the small city the protag resides about
>the party is held inside a mansion by an unknown host
>it was a death trap all allong where guest after guest ends up disappearing/turning up dead
>protag regrets his decision

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 10:52:17 2017 No.10031223 >>10028066 I'd read it.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 10:58:41 2017 No.10031234

> Novel is the life story of a schizoaffective transsexual who thinks they're a dragon
> Interwoven narrative jumps back and forth between school life, a bizarre lovecraftian style dream, the challenges of mental illness and all the general bullshit oppression narrative that goes with being trans, a video game series they're working on, and a trip to europe that ends in adopting some sort of weird heretical christianity.
> It's just my life desu
> mfw I'm trying to finish writing it before I kill myself because I'm homeless atm with no real chance of escape.
> mfw can't write, can't think, no discernible talent

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:07:47 2017 No.10031263 >>10025114 you can steal all the ideas you want, but you still can't write a single line to save your life.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:15:58 2017 No.10031290

>set in Hungary
>great grandfather fights in WWI, drinks, beats son
>son grows up, has child, is now grandfather
>grandfather fights in WWII, drinks, beats son
>son grows up, has child, is now father
>father does not fight in war, still drinks and beats son, both live with grandfather
>grandfather lives to see what father does to son firsthand, and in his old age tries to convince father that this is not the way to raise a child, despite raising father in this exact way
>grandfather tries to be role model for son, doesn't know how
>fights with father often
>father eventually kills himself after coming to realisation he is a piec of shit
>son runs away
>years later, son returns to granfather with child of his own
>they live together uneasily
>he drinks too much one day and hits his son, and leaves the next day forever
>grandfather tries to raise grandson himself to not be like him or father

>all of them are named Istvan

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:21:39 2017 No.10031310 >>10031263 Then you've got nothing to worry about, right? Quick, tell me that idea you think will put your name on the map :)

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:28:06 2017 No.10031329

>>10031234
I mean

If you just write a short book about your somewhat fictionalised experiences as a homeless person, intercut with your bizarre dreams, and then kill yourself shortly after it's published, it could gain some attention. Dead artists are better in the eyes of the public, for some reason.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:31:54 2017 No.10031346

>>10031329

I'm expecting it realistically to be about 300 pages. I don't want to write about homelessness. Homelessness isn't interesting. Nor is it's uninteresting-ness so interesting that I can't capture those themes by writing on other aspects of my life.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:32:53 2017 No.10031351 >>10031346 So are you counting on its bizarre qualities?

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:33:58 2017 No.10031355

I won't post my main idea, since it's actually really good.
This is my second idea, which is really undeveloped.
>Fantasy world. Not with elves.
>A hotel isolated in the woods, with no signs of civilization close by
>The woods have mystic dangers and monsters the deeper you go
>Woods are not that important to plot, as most of the action will be inside the hotel
>Main character explores the hotel, and finds out about all the interesting characters.
>The main question after a while becomes: if the woods are so dangerous, why don't the monsters attack the hotel?
>Will use the allegory of the hotel being a star, and the forest being darkness.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:38:52 2017 No.10031375 >>10031290 Would read

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:39:53 2017 No.10031379 >>10030962 What's the conspiracy? This is only worth it if its not some faux political bullshit.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:44:01 2017 No.10031392 >>10031290 >>all of them are named Istvan Fucking kek

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:45:46 2017 No.10031396 >>10031351 I'm just trying to be sincere and capture my perspective and philosophy, preferably in the right tone and using the right tools of expression.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:46:51 2017 No.10031399 my novel doesn't have, or need, a "plot"

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:48:15 2017 No.10031403

>>10028066
Getting some 'Serbian Film' vibes from this one. Would maybe read.

>>10028319
This one actually sounds interesting. I can imagine it having various points where characters interact with each other, retold from different points of view. Would it simply be descriptive, or would it be narrated in a 'unaware of what is going to happen, they make these plans and do this' sort of way? Would read either way.

>>10028920
>he was never really there meme
Unless this is extra satire, then stop. Would not read.

>>10029269
Seems quite needlesly complex and with too many characters, but perhaps that's just your description. Interesting concept, difficult to pull off effectively. Might read.

>>10030962
This would really only be interesting if there either very obviously is no conspiracy, or it's never revealed whether there is one or not or left vague. Otherwise, would not read.

>>10030975
Agatha Christie please go

>>10031234
I can't imagine this as anything other than surrealism or tumblr-tier garbage. Would not read.

>>10031290
Somehow this reminds me of 'One Hundred Years of Solitude'. Would read.

>>10031355
Underdeveloped is right. It just sounds like that one episode of 'Over the Garden Wall'. Would maybe read.

>inb4 autist responds to every post

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:50:18 2017 No.10031411 >>10031403 > I can't imagine this as anything other than surrealism or tumblr-tier garbage. Would not read. Then you're unimaginative, and also predictable.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 11:58:04 2017 No.10031427 >>10031234 If that is your first book and you cannot write, you should really pick an easier idea.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 12:01:03 2017 No.10031434 >>10031403 it's these kinds of posts which keep these threads alive. people who can't take criticism are not self sustaining.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 12:04:01 2017 No.10031445 >>10028066 if you were tongue in cheek about it i would definitely read it, but not if it was a serious story.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 12:08:59 2017 No.10031460

>Novel on the different types of punishments you receive in hell
>formatted in a way similar to Calvino's invisible cities
>series of four to five paragraph descriptions of different "rooms" in hell where the damned are sent depending on their sin
>have rooms for broad categories like sloth, lust, etc
>have rooms for more specific groups too . i.e. rooms for actors, rooms for artists, rooms for faithless Christians, rooms for nonbelievers, etc.
>centered around the idea that in the afterlife you get exactly what you want

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 12:28:33 2017 No.10031522

>Three protagonists with somewhat intertwined stories, don't interact often but are more thematically connected; theme is "search for meaning/masculinity"
>First protagonist is a disgraced private eye with a penchant for harsh violence; kicked out of his profession, travels around trying to find a new purpose and outlet for his violent nature. Gets pretty bloody but his story is mostly humorous and parodic in nature
>second story concerns a pimp and confidence man who is cursed by a beggar to die in 60 days; while searching for a reversal (which requires him to give some very bad people what they want) begins to evaluate whether he even really cares about living, as he's achieved all his goals
>third story concerns a young prince in a fairly long line who has no desire to rule; longs for a life of romance; this story is the most optimistic and dreamlike of the three, jumps between dreams, sequences of court life, and (later) travelling the world engaging in romantic activities and taking paramours (character is kind of modelled off Julien Sorel too)

Tell me what you think

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 12:42:40 2017 No.10031562

>>10031403
>This would really only be interesting if there either very obviously is no conspiracy, or it's never revealed whether there is one or not or left vague. Otherwise, would not read.

Of course it's left vague, the intrigue at first is the mystery of the bomb and the character trying to figure out what happened but then it focus on the protagonist's own paranoia and makes you question if he is just making shit up

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 12:50:06 2017 No.10031595 >>10031460 what i want doesn't matter, because the me that is now will not be when i am dead. there is nothing after this for me, and even if there is, it is impossible for me to experience it. what room do i get?

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 12:54:06 2017 No.10031609 It's a book for children >a gang of kids play on the moon >each chapter is based on a topological feature of it >for example, there is a chapter about Mare Nubium that is about the kids making sculptures out of clouds That is about it.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 12:56:18 2017 No.10031623 >>10031609 Sounds like a delightful book, anon I hope you finish it

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 13:12:04 2017 No.10031659

>future earth
>humans created robots 'cos why not
>robots have multifaceted ai that changes and adapts to the mannerisms and demeanour of the humans present
>far far future where the plot actually takes place
>humans fucked off a while ago for some reason that probably isn't disclosed
>still a bunch of robots kicking around
>there's a lone pirate radio station that broadcasts hip hop music 24/7
>bots' ai becomes accustomed to this
>all the robots do is dick around having rap battles as they whittle away their time on a dying planet
>at some point protag bot and some other dudes decide it's time to find out where the fuck this station is
>commence journey to triangulate the station, leaving one of the group behind at each stop in order to create a relay system
>existential dread sets in as the group gets smaller
>haven't worked out a good ending yet lol

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:07:58 2017 No.10031820

>>10031329
>see book
>author killed himself
>hmm I wonder why
>because he wrote a book
>with letters and all
>hmm
>maybe it's in the book
>let's find out

This is why.

>>10031346
Keep in mind that the average person doesn't know shy about life as a homeless person. It's mostly volunteer workers and the homeless themselves that do. It's an interesting subject.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:25:45 2017 No.10031876 >start to write out plot >realise it's hard to explain, and therefore probably shit >happens to be for my Masters dissertation in Creative Writing, due in less than 2 weeks >can feel the dream of one day being published being forever out of reach >yay

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:35:38 2017 No.10031903 >>10031876 >Creative Writing Masters >But somehow not yet published You're either an ACTUAL retard or you're lying.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:38:35 2017 No.10031914 >>10031903 Having a degree in Creative Writing, at ANY level, doesn't guarantee that you'll be published, anon.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:42:50 2017 No.10031923 >>10031914 If you're actually working towards your MASTERS in creative writing and you're not published AT ALL, you're either lying or ACTUALLY retarded.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:47:52 2017 No.10031939

>>10031923
Or there's a third option, which is that I went straight into the MA after the BA, because the uni was celebrating some anniversary and certain MAs were discounted for returning students. So I've been in education for four straight years, and everything I've been writing has been towards passing, rather than anything I want to get published.

Or, because I know it's what you're going to reply with, I'm either lying or actually retarded.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:48:56 2017 No.10031941 >>10031939 >I'm either lying or actually retarded. Couldn't have said it better myself. That or you're in a creative writing program so shitty that they're giving you good grades for works that aren't publishable.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:58:34 2017 No.10031961 >>10031445 It's meant to be partially tongue in cheek where I sort of parody the contrarian and obsessive nature of different horror authors peddling shock value as true horror. Glad someone could pick up on that.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 14:59:45 2017 No.10031965
File: 252 KB, 746x960, IMG_6938.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10025064
Would read if he was not reaponsible for the destruction of the ecosystem and in the end of the book he organised a massacre in the nearest city.

>>10025102
Keep working on it

>>10025272
Could be interesting

>>10025747
Not interested

>>10025850
Original

>>10026085
Stop hating Hillary

>>10027483
Keep trying

>>10027757
Huh?

>>10027891
Would read

>>10028005
Nope.

>>10028066
What the fuck

>>10028319
This could be good. Need more details.

>>10028920
Could work as a short story.

>>10029269
Sorry, can't get into that sort of stuff. It could be good, I guess.

>>10029275
Back to pol

>>10029305
Keep working on it

>>10029311
Idea for a short story. Nice.

>>10030962
Interesting. More about the rabbit hole?

>>10030966
Bad... try something else.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:02:12 2017 No.10031973

>man's father gets poisoned
>he gets framed of murdering him to due not being able to produce a valid alibi
>considers his option and decides to flee the country
>rest of the novel is the protag trying to evade interpol and live with the consequences of his actions while trying to fabricate a secret identity

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:27:39 2017 No.10032044

>>10031659
Drop everything prior to ">humans fucked off a while ago..." Have the story begin just with the robots.
Consider leaving it as a short story about robots doing nothing but rap battles and getting high, or whatever robot equivalent. I don't think the space station journey part is going to be interesting. Do you really even need them to be robots to tell that story? How is it any different from some adventure/disaster story about humans on a foreign planet getting separated from their space ship?
>>10031522
I think I wouldn't read it desu. You have one character who is just a trope but apparently that's okay because its supposed to be "parodic" and two characters who will probably just be your outlet for sophmoric existential pinings. Not saying its impossible for any of this to be good, but if you're still a new writer this might end up bad.
>>10031460
Interesting, keep working on it.
>>centered around the idea that in the afterlife you get exactly what you want
What does this mean?
>>10031355
Could be good, but yeah, a bit underdeveloped.
For some reason I feel like children should play an important role. The curious-yet-frightful quality of the woods is the attitude children have to lots of things before they grow up and become rational and knowledgeable about the world. Maybe I'm wrong.
>>10031290
This is good, but you've got some serious issues with the plot: where the fuck are all the wives? What are they doing during all this? Why is grandfather raising his great-grandson when conceivably his mother should still be somewhere?
Also, I think it would be stronger if the story ends with son and his child returning to live with grandfather. Grandfather is your wise centerpiece. The tragedy is that his son doesn't listen to his advice. The story is complete when the person whom you're calling son (who is actually grandson) returns as a grown man. You don't need to go back and repeat the same damn arc for a forth time.
Also, naming them all "Istvan" is a bit too transparent of a way of suggesting that these tragic flaws are inherited and inevitable. Four generations of abusive fathers will make that clear to the reader.
>>father eventually kills himself after coming to realisation he is a piec of shit
This is awful; people don't kill themselves for philosophical reasons. They kill themselves because their lives are unfulfilling. If you really need to get rid of this character think of something better. Maybe he gets in a barfight and someone kills him.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:29:20 2017 No.10032051 >>10032044 *fourth

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:40:02 2017 No.10032089 File: 77 KB, 200x186, db0.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google] >>10032044 >This is awful; people don't kill themselves for philosophical reasons. But they do all the time anon, especially when politics is involved

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:41:39 2017 No.10032095

>>10032044
>Drop everything prior to ">humans fucked off a while ago..." Have the story begin just with the robots.
>Consider leaving it as a short story about robots doing nothing but rap battles and getting high, or whatever robot equivalent. I don't think the space station journey part is going to be interesting. Do you really even need them to be robots to tell that story? How is it any different from some adventure/disaster story about humans on a foreign planet getting separated from their space ship?

Ah yeah I should have noted, the plot actually takes place in media res with the bots doing the things you gave as examples. The pirate radio station is actually someplace down on earth, so the point of the plot is that they need to go on a trek out into the deserts and shit looking for it.

The reason they're robots is that for one I just really like the idea of hip hop robots, but more than that the plot started off as just regular humans on present day earth with a personal story. I still wanted to do the 'They have to leave x character behind for reasons pertaining to the triangulation process' but after a while of storyboarding in my mind I realized these contrivances seemed a bit blunt, especially with multiple characters. Having robots allows me to literally use them as 'beacons' so to speak for the process, as in instead of humans planting down radio recievers or something, the robots would have to act /as/ the recievers. Two birds one stone.

I figure it will be like a journey of the soul for characters that have no souls. Could also take an afrofuturist angle and put some hopefully tactile commentary on hip hop culture as a whole, like these bots are out there in a fucking wasteland doing fuck all but listen to shitty rap music for 100s if not 1000s of years, I'm sure I could work something at least a little meaningful into that.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:42:33 2017 No.10032099
File: 1.47 MB, 720x404, 1503159642727.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10024996
>Uncle molests nephew whilst drunk
>Nephew enjoys, uncle doesn't
>Vicious fight ensues with father of the son (uncle's brother-in-law) attacking the uncle
>Nephew kills himself because he's a melodramatic faggot with killer thighs

Thoughts? Need it done for next thursday

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:48:05 2017 No.10032113

>>10032044
Probably should have included more detail but you're still right. He's not a "parody" character, it's more the situations he puts himself into that are parodic (and even then only lightly parodic.) Never meant to imply that I wanted to try and address existential questions or find purpose, it's just the journey of the characters. It is first and foremost comedic. Thanks for the criticism anyways, there are a lot of side characters that bear plenty of importance and there is a main plot that isn't super related to the characters' motives

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:49:11 2017 No.10032120 >>10031659 The cyberiad

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:51:56 2017 No.10032134

>>10032089
But they don't. A few meme examples aside, they do it because they're depressed, not because they had some sudden introspective realization.
>>10032095
Oh damn, I think I completely misunderstood some parts of the greentext when I first read it. It seems pretty interesting to me now.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:53:57 2017 No.10032142 >>10032113 >It is first and foremost comedic Ah, well I could maybe see this working then.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 15:56:31 2017 No.10032153

>>10031403
>Seems quite needlesly complex and with too many characters, but perhaps that's just your description.
Been working for half a year to streamline the story but didn't do too much to translate it to the outline, so yeah, understandable. Thanks for your reply either way!

>>10031434
Exactly, complains about that never made any sense.

>>10031820
The novelty wears down pretty fast. It's a lot like the druggy memoirs that get stale once you got the gist after couple pages. With homelessness there is a plus that the individual stories can wary a lot but following one homeless guy being homeless for the majority of the book sounds rather dull.

>>10031876
If it's that hard to explain, it might be down to your own gasp of it lacking (or abilities as a writer of course). Don't you guys use retard-proof beat sheets?

>and everything I've been writing has been towards passing
Why, tho? It's not like it's a super prestigious degree that lets you walk into everything you'd want to. If you don't have anything publishable, you'll just end with an expensive piece of paper.

>>10031965
>can't get into that sort of stuff
Fair enough.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 16:08:02 2017 No.10032198

It's a poem
>a guy has a green thumb
>one day he meets an entity who claims to be his muse
>she offers him inspiration in return for praises sung in her name
>guy travels and creates great works of art
>eventually realizes that he just wants to be home tending his garden
>he lives a happy and quiet life
not every story needs to be complicated

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 16:31:33 2017 No.10032316

>About an office man coming home one day to find his rope and chair talking
>The plot is about the duos relationship and workplace adventures with the man
>As the plot progresses the chair and the rope stop talking so often and finally just disappear
>The novel ends with the man finally killing himself

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 16:47:31 2017 No.10032364

>>10032134
>But they don't.
They do actually, and depression is a chemical disorder in the brain, some people do commit suicide by thinking themselves to death. Remember that famous first soliloquy of Hamlet where he contemplates suicide? If you do that enough, you'll kill yourself without ever being depressed. Some people kill themselves out of anger, some have political motivations, some out of depression, and some out of thinking themselves to death.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 17:04:17 2017 No.10032427

>Dude has been working on his “craft” for quite some time
>He hasn’t gone out of his apartment for days
>Someone knocks at his door
>Behind the door there´s a tall, pale, and thin man with the grin and the eyes of someone who has evaded death for far too long
>The tall man hands our protagonist a letter and tells how it was sent by someone very dear to him and then leaves
>Intrigued, the protagonist checks the front of the envelope and discover that the only bit of information written on it’s the name of the sender: Soo
>He doesn’t seem to recognize the name and decides to open the letter in hopes of finding an explanation of this so singular event
>To his surprise there’s nothing but a blank piece of paper inside the envelope
>Our character then assumes that perhaps there is a secret code occult in that paper
>Tries as many methods as he can think in order to find it
>All of them fail
>After a while he begins to ponder if perhaps it’s the product of a bored prankster brought to him by mere chance (for he has no friends or knows any person who’d do such a thing)
>Or if perchance the white piece of paper is in itself a symbolic message send by cruel sadist
>All these ideas make our character start to questions himself and his sense of meaning
>He is brought into a spiral of doubt and confusion as he reflects on his past experiences
>Concludes that the only rational thing a man, like himself, in such a predicament is to commit suicide
>He then begins to plan a death worthy of representing the way he lived his life
>As he is arriving into some conclusions on what that should be someone knocks at his door
>It’s the tall man, who tells him that due to some confusions, byproduct of the bizarre indications of delivery, he got the address wrong and was instead supposed to deliver the letter to the department right in front of the main characters’
>After apologizing some more, the tall man takes the letter and leaves
>Our main character stays silently behind the door for a while and then decides to go back working on his craft

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 17:29:24 2017 No.10032517

>>10025850
Seems something Borges and Kafka would collaborate on.

Make it so that there are people living in the maze, and they all know the way out(even thought they stay for some weird and unexplained reason), but none of them will tell him how to get out.

When he leaves the last page of the manuscript, he reads it and it says something about being trapped and having no way back, and as he tries to go back, all the pages were blown by the wind.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 17:32:07 2017 No.10032532 >>10028066 Beautiful anon, it's highly descriptive of the current year. Can the mc be a swede please?

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 17:38:07 2017 No.10032557 >>10032427 As a shortstory, for sure.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 18:03:25 2017 No.10032646

>>10032427
This might be the best one ITT. I'm imagining some intersection of noir, absurdism, and cerebral terror. As the other guy said, do it as a short story, and then post it here so I can read the finished product.
But does it really have to be suicide? Seems a bit dramatic, but I guess you know what you're doing.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 18:32:32 2017 No.10032734 THEN WHO WAS PHONE

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 19:25:38 2017 No.10032877 >>10028066 I like the idea, but what is the deeper purpose of it? Does any of it has any meaning? Because if not, it would just be erotic gore

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 20:11:05 2017 No.10032990

>turn of the 19th century canada
>cartographer, jesuit, and maybe one or two other helpers and their native guide travel north through manitoba to chart unexplored lands
>trip starts off great, but begins to decline
>as they travel from village to village, seeing how the euros treat and swindle his people starts to get to him
>native is distraught
>speaks to his spirit guide, it renews his strength
>this trend continues as the euros become more and more depraved
>they travel further into the marsh and swampland
>the imagery slowly takes a more corrupted description
>while canoeing across a lake, a storm rolls in amd they are forced to land on an island in the centre of a massive lake
>no food, lost their guns when one of the canoes capsized
>the men order the native to set up camp while they to hunting
>they come back with new guns and ammo and strange meat
>native inquires, men intimidate him so he just goes along with it the men found a small hunting camp of indians and murdered them
>native suspects something, sneaks away again to speak to his spirit guide
>his guide doesnt appear
>things progress in a depraved way
>native tries to speak to his spirit again, these scenes all take place with him journeying into the forest and sitting at a fire with his animal across from him
>he finally finds the fire again
>there is a daek figure sitting where his guide had before
>his guide is dead at its feet
> it's the wendigo

the rest is just him slowly turning on the group and subtly sabatoging them, giving them bad directions etc. My problem is this. Do I end it with a betrayal and keep it just historical fiction and make the problems all solely mental, or do I make him slowly become a demon and make this a horror novel

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 20:40:29 2017 No.10033078 >>10031427 It's my fourth I think.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 20:51:42 2017 No.10033107 >The founding myth of America >The God-founders of America: the gods Equality and Freedom >Constantly in struggle with one another. >Greek myth style story about the Gods of America. SO Autistic but I think it's kinda funny.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 21:41:13 2017 No.10033195 >>10026085 Would read this but only to reaffirm my preexisting mysogonistic world views

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 22:37:34 2017 No.10033344
File: 50 KB, 960x648, Meanwhile in Florida.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10024996
>Man in the Watchtower rip off
>except instead of the Germans steamrolling the US, they face staunch, brutal and bitter resistance
>every act of the book takes place in a different region of the US
>Wehrmacht faces off with the Old Americans in Maine and Vermont during a very cold Winter
>SS have to deal with the elusive KKK in the deep south and swamps
>Fallschirmjager getting BTFO by mountain people in Appalachia
>Wehrmacht whose supply lines are too spread out deal with Texans, Tejanos and Comanche
>With the help of the Japanese and Mexican Nationalists, Wehrmacht have to fight White, Latino and Native South-westerners in desert warfare
>Urban Warfare in New York or Boston due to insurgency

Pretty much turn the invasion of the US into Germany's Vietnam War, what do you guys think?

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 22:42:52 2017 No.10033359

>>10033344
It's a literary representation of /k/ jacking off. Market it there if you want (you)s and a chance of some actual useful advice about the topic
Aside from that, its kind of interesting. Try to give the protagonists some unifying factor, or give the either of the groups some sort of character or something pivotal they are fighting for or contrast the protagonosts heavily and you may have something. War just for war's sake is quite bland.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 22:49:19 2017 No.10033369
File: 1.89 MB, 1920x1080, LIBERTY OR DEATH.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10033359
>implying I'm not a /k/ommando

But yea, I fleshed out the KKK and the Old Americans a lot with my pre-writing since they are (IMO at least) the more interesting groups. KKK would fight the Germans because while they may hate catholic and non whites, they definitely hate invaders even more, especially if they're Germanic (KKK are mainly WASPs), leaning more towards Paganism (SS) and un-American (in their own eyes), also they see an opportunity to make the South rise again if they kick the Germans out.

The Old Americans would comprise of families who have been there since the Colonial days, lots of maritime raids, brutal reprisals and patriot/minutemen imagery. The cold weather and snow would really give the whole "ice around your heart" feeling between the Old Yankees and invading Germans

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 22:50:48 2017 No.10033376 >>10033344 >Comanche Wait, like the Native American tribe that effectively died off before the start of the 20th cenutry?

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 22:53:19 2017 No.10033384 >>10033376 There's still Comanche kicking today in Northern Texas/Southwestern Oklahoma, I chose them because I find them fascinating

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 22:54:31 2017 No.10033387 >>10033384 Yeah, like all 30 of them. How are they going to be an effective fighting force? Surely all their horsemanship had died out by the 40's?

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 22:55:49 2017 No.10033394 >>10033344 >>SS have to deal with the elusive KKK in the deep south and swamps Haven't you seen Wolfenstein 2? The KKK would gladly work with the Nazis.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 23:00:04 2017 No.10033406

>>10033344
>>SS have to deal with the elusive KKK
That part alone should be funny enough to justify this novel.

It sounds very trashy but like the type of trash that'll get a moderate following, so commercially it's not a bad call for sure.

> they definitely hate invaders even more
Doubt it. They and all Americans are invaders but KKK doesn't care about that. Germans could paint themselves as liberators from degenerate liberal values infesting Murica culture, so they'd need to have to move away from Christianity completely for the conflict, which wouldn't be the most unrealistic part about it all.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 23:01:24 2017 No.10033410

>>10024996

>dude starts to notice his best friend is slowly becoming someone else
>he starts gathering clues and realizes he is not his friend, but an alien entity (kind of like the shining)
>dude tries to show evidence of his findings to the townsfolk and to the authorities
>story ends when main character realizes this entity has assimilated everyone around him and he is the last man standing

How bad does it sound to you, anon? would you read?

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 23:01:24 2017 No.10033411

>>10033387
There's about 15k today, their numbers peaked in the late 18th Century so there would still be a population in Northern Texas by the 40s

>>10033394
Did some research on the KKK and Nazis, they really did not like each other in reality, the Nazis thought the KKK were the pinnacle of American brutality and the KKK hated the Nazis for pushing for threatening US hegemony and not being Americans (the KKK of the 30s through 50s was very nativist)

I also think it would be more interesting to have them fight each other and a nice twist on things with all things considered

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 23:05:38 2017 No.10033421

>>10033406
Like I said in >>10033411, the KKK and Nazis did not like each other in reality which allows me to flip the table on people, most would expect the KKK to help the Nazis and I find that kind of boring. Nazis having to comb swamps looking for these hooded fucks, seeing burned or tarred and feather corpses of the SS hanging from trees and the occasional burning cross to remind them their being watched before getting ambushed and strung up themselves?

Thats interesting

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 23:11:08 2017 No.10033438 >>10033410 the body snatchers?

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 23:11:13 2017 No.10033439

>>10033421
They didn't like each other because Nazis are populists and KKK were never too popular, so they had no reasons to adjust their rhetoric, given the right circumstances they'd get along fine, but yeah, there are ways to create a conflict too, so it wouldn't be too shocking either.

Besides it creates the funny "can't they both just kill each other dilemmas" where the reader wonders about which horrible group is the worse one. As long it's on the side and the protagonist doesn't belong to either, it'd work fine.

Anonymous Sat Sep 16 23:15:45 2017 No.10033452

>>10033439
The KKK have kind of a useful idiot role in the grand scheme of things, their ultimate goal is to vietcong the Nazis until they either pull out or cannot afford to keep on fighting so they can establish the Confederacy again. Of course, the US military is getting their shit together and will steamroll the KKK eventually before they get a shot, keep in mind this is all taking place in the chaotic early days of the invasion where the regular American has to form militias and insurgencies to fight off the Nazis anyway they can, I'm just trying to figure out how each regions insurgency would look like and still make it interesting.

>>	Anonymous Sat Sep 16 23:37:43 2017 No.10033511 >>10033452 Will there be the obligatory "black guy about to get lynched by KKK rescued by nazis" scene?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 00:13:53 2017 No.10033584 >>10033511 Lol there will be now

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 00:37:02 2017 No.10033661 >>10024996 >Nonfiction >Nick Land meets Taleb

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 00:44:34 2017 No.10033682 >>10033439 >nazis and kkk >either one being horrible Sounds like a story with two noblebright protagonists to me.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 00:50:23 2017 No.10033700 >>10026121 >>10032517 These are both good! I will complete this asap and post.

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 00:56:48 2017 No.10033720

>>10033438
I haver never read the book nor watched the film. But I guess the idea is already out there.

My approach was to make the assimilation process kind of like gradually. Kind of like Thesseu's ship, in shich the alien is little by little getting rid of the victim's cells and replacing them with his own genetic code. This way, the alien entity (kind od like Unity from Rick and Morty) takes over the planet.

Main character is basically "I am legend", in the sense that he is the last man on earth that is not an alien.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 00:59:39 2017 No.10033730 >>10033720 > kind of like gradually. > Kind of like Thesseu's ship Man, do I suck at pitch

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 01:01:10 2017 No.10033736 >there is no government >is there a government? >there must be a government >there is definitely a government >there is no government and >someday she will be the government

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 01:12:07 2017 No.10033763

>do-gooder type man and his wife go on tropical vacation along with a few of his interesting friends and family
>is alone for a moment while looking at some tiki masks
>ground gives way beneath him, warped into some other world
>big oogabooga demon tells him they're going to steal his soul
>unless he can find the person that cursed him and force him to reverse the curse or murder him
>the only possible candidates are people currently on the island who have access to this magic
>he must deduce who wants to get rid of him before his vacation days are up

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 02:02:44 2017 No.10033901 >>10033682 This, anyone able to drain the cities of their shit skin problem is a saint.

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 02:05:48 2017 No.10033909

>book about a 5"11 white guy who makes it in the NBA
>the trick is he can only perform while in blackface
>after soul searching and drama the sister of a gay black friend convinces him that the power was inside him all along
>he gets crushed, loses his team the gamr
>moral is the story is that everything's better if it is kinda offensive

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 02:13:18 2017 No.10033931 >>10033909 >moral is the story is that everything's better if it is kinda offensive Surely you could've presented the moral much better in a way that's not punching down, which is less offensive than it is pathetic.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 02:16:43 2017 No.10033941 >>10033931 You have a strange definition of punching down anon.

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 02:16:44 2017 No.10033942

>>10032877
I basically want to create a combination between Marquis de Sade and Lovecraft, which is no easy feat considering that de Sade abhored dream like sequences as he wanted to portray man at his worst in the most realistic way possible
Yet I love the excessive grotesque realism of de Sade but also enjoy the psychological inhumanity of Lovecraft , so what I want to build is a synthesis between two extremely unlike authors where the hyper-realism of extreme trauma drives people to insanity

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 02:42:28 2017 No.10034003

>>10024996
>super affluence kid (maybe 17?) in lethargic shitty near future
>is secretly routinely raped by his caregiver
>acts out in spurts of violence, has killed someone before
>hates everything because of hormones and trauma
>eventually finds this godess and falls for the "love at first sight" meme
>this girls turns out to be in a feminist man-hating cult
>can our sad, pathetic hero turn his life around? find out on the next episode of DBZ

I cant be fucked to write the rest because I hate my life

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 02:43:30 2017 No.10034005 >>10026085 please write it

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 03:36:32 2017 No.10034132

>>10032044
Part of the point in the repetition is that the wives are all absent for various reasons. Either they've left or are dead. Looking back, I didn't express that whatsoever in the plot summary. Part of the concept is without a nurturing influence, like the traditional concept of motherhood, they just end up the same way, which I also did not mention because I was not actually expecting replies.

Another good point is stopping it when the son and grandson come back to live with the grandfather. Going on longer than that just drags it out, now that I think about it. I'll take that on board.

However, I did want to argue the point of the father killing himself. Even if it's not a direct suicide, I want to make the point that it is his own actions and refusal to reform, be it through an actual suicide or through an accident involving alcohol, that gets him killed.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 03:38:49 2017 No.10034137 >>10032044 >>10034132 Also, should mention: in my family (until me) the firstborn son was always named Istvan. Combined with my family's propensity for alcoholism and violence, that was my reasoning, but maybe I should change it.

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 03:44:52 2017 No.10034151

>>10032044
>>10031595

>what does this mean
>get exactly what you want

i didn't articulate myself correctly here. It's not that you get whatever you want, but that you get what you asked for. here's a watered down example of one.

>Lustful person fills their life with sex
>ok, here's an eternity of sex and pleasure
>eternirty is a long fucking time
>become desensitized to every kink and fetish

best example i can come up with on the fly at 4 a.m. right before going to bed.

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 08:32:07 2017 No.10034755

I'm writing a screenplay set in Mississippi in three separate timelines, one in 1890s, one in 1920s and one in 1950s or 1980s. All of them would be narrated by the mute kid. First one would be regarding escaped rapist, second one crime committed by Indians and the third would be missing child case. Main characters from all three periods would be sheriffs. If anyone is interested I could greentext stories but what do you think?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 08:39:57 2017 No.10034782 >>10034755 Sounds interesting. I like how the time changes a long with the timeline, makes the story more interesting. Also are the sheriffs connected in any way?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 08:46:22 2017 No.10034797 >>10034782 Yeah, that was my intention. Storyline would get more and more darker and fatalistic as the time progress, there would also be a lot of christian themes. Also, sheriffs are not connected except the position they share, why?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 08:52:27 2017 No.10034811 >>10034797 That is very interesting, In which way would the story get darker and fatalistic. When you said there would be christian themes, would there be influential pastors and clergies in the city/town. Sheriffs have separate rolls in the story?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 08:59:16 2017 No.10034826 A young sociopathic Russian homosexual rapist amongst the ranks of the Imperial Russian Army during the Crimean war

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 09:05:29 2017 No.10034842

>>10034811
Well, each crime would be more darker than the previous one, culminating in a death/rape of a child. Themes of Christianity would develop trough storyline, at first clergy would be genuine but at the end they would become caricatures of themselves, serving only to manipulate masses. Also, Christianity would also be represented trough individuals. Sheriffs would bear burden of responsibility to solve crimes, pressured by the community. Also, one of the themes would be struggle between law and order, where sheriffs obviously represent order. Also, all three stories would be in fictional county.

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 09:15:14 2017 No.10034867

>>10034842
I must say, this is impressive in a way, I really mean it. However would those stories be connected or would they be independent from each other. Is there a pattern to the stories as well? In what way would clergies develop? I didn't really understand that part. Can you also give me a picture of the surroundings and the spirit of the own? I am getting a kinda western feel even though the time changes. And are the timelines equal? Is one of them going to be longer than the other?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 09:26:30 2017 No.10034900 >>10034826 Meh, can you provide more details please?

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 09:37:28 2017 No.10034922

>>10034867
>connected
They would be to some extent; for exemple, some characters that are old in 1980s would be shown as young in 1920s, since all of the stories would be in the same county.
>clergy
Well, at first religion would be genuine within the community and the end it would take form of organized religion without any sctual faith.
>surroundings and the spirit
County would be small, poor and conservative, consisted of all in Mississippi; swamps, blues, blacks, small businesses, everyone knows everyone. Also I wanted to create the feeling where someone would think of: "Damn, someone could disappear here and noone would ever notice". Also, people would mostly be rednecks-like. Although crime isa common time, I would like to make it in the way that every time it happens it disturbs community.
>timelines
Last one is going to be the longest since I started with it. Also thinking about adding fourth one, where community would join to stop fire spreading trough the woods, making somehow optimistic end, but I'm not entirely sure, maybe it would be too much and maybe pessimistic end is better. What do you think?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 09:44:45 2017 No.10034939 >>10034922 Please don't steal my idea.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 09:47:07 2017 No.10034945 >dead teenager observing his funeral, first person account not exactly a novel more of a short story

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 09:49:52 2017 No.10034952 >>10033107 written as a satire on the current political situation this would actually be pretty good.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 09:52:56 2017 No.10034958 >>10028066 10/10 would read

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 10:08:57 2017 No.10035000

>>10034922
Damn this is interesting, I would definitely watch your film man. It does have that Western feel, but not the conventional one (Spaghetti Western) that is why I think it is so special. The county seems very cozy in a way, I mean everyone is friends with everyone right? Is this a real country or a made up one? You said that anyone can disappear and no one would notice, I am guessing that the main motive for those crimes which would be seen in different timelines are about kidnapping or abducting people? Are the clergy powerful in the town, do I mean are they respected by the people?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 10:10:36 2017 No.10035005 >>10034939 Do not worry, I am not a kind of person who would do that, I am an intellectual artist who respects people's creations and ideas and yours is truly rare and exceptional. Anyway I have a story of my own I am working on.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 10:20:59 2017 No.10035025 >>10035000 It's a fictional county. It's not only about abducting but about some covered evil that's lurking in swamps and woods, and of course it is just a feeling.

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 10:32:28 2017 No.10035062

>>10035025
Your plot very mildly reminds me of a book by Elizabeth Scott (Living Dead Girl.)
The book itself isn't very interesting it could have been much better. However the main theme is abduction, where a woman is abducted by a pedophile. The book is not really connected with your story but the motive of abduction is similar, as she was also abducted strangely as nobody noticed her disappearance for a few years. Moreover your story doesn't include only abduction in it, what crimes are there as well?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 10:46:24 2017 No.10035098 >>10035062 There would also be escape of alleged rapist and murder commited by Indian tribe (headless body found). Both of them would be left unsolved. I don't want to go into details since I'm too paranoid.

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 10:52:48 2017 No.10035118

>>10035098
Interesting, I see your story has depth, I am sure that it will keep the eyes of your viewers. Listen, please do not be paranoid, I do have experience in cinematography somewhat, I've worked in a studio and my job was to motivate young filmmakers and individuals with new ideas. Of course I am not comfortable with leaving my name here on 4chan but please do not think I would steal your idea.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 10:59:34 2017 No.10035138 >>10035098 Well, I am not going to steal your idea if that's what you mean.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 13:16:07 2017 No.10035595 >>10032532 I was going to make him British, I hear Brits and Swedes are like twins these days though.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 13:17:11 2017 No.10035600 >>10034826 >Crimean War >Not Russian Civil War Wew lad

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 13:18:42 2017 No.10035608 >>10034003 Randy? Is that you? https://youtu.be/tgZHsh5-J3A

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 14:07:09 2017 No.10035787 >>10032990 This sounds great desu

Anonymous Sun Sep 17 14:13:46 2017 No.10035813

>Guy buys candy bar
>Unwraps
>There's a dick inside
>Upon closer inspection realizes it's his own dick
>Investigates candy bar factory and discovers that it's a front and they're actually a company that is making cloned body parts based on his DNA without his knowledge
>Title of book is May Contain Nuts

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 14:50:47 2017 No.10035999 >>10034755 >>10034867 >>10034922 anyone else interested to give comment on my work?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 14:52:23 2017 No.10036004 >>10035138 Not just you, but there are people and I would hate myself if that happened. I did not want to offend you are something, please ask more if you are interested.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 15:01:05 2017 No.10036032 >A parodic fable of a man's internal conflict concerning the ethical values of eating a sandwich, and - ultimately - any food at all.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 15:04:41 2017 No.10036043 >A parodic parable of a man's internal conflict concerning the ethical values of eating a sandwich, and - ultimately - any food at all.

Fenjer Sun Sep 17 15:30:12 2017 No.10036121

>it starts with two brothers playing at home
>their father is a painter
>he is somewhat famous but not rich
>they live in a house that is in front of a highway
>30 years later
>one of the brothers is a successful painter, followed the steps of his father
>the other one lives still lives in the house along the highway, alone
>he installed a billboard there, and with the money he earns for the rent of said billboard, he is able to survive
>spends all day painting
>none of his works sell
>no one gives a shit about his paintings
>gets obsessed with creating a "perfect painting" where he can express everything he feels
>that way everyone will know who he is, they will all pay attention, he will be remembered
>decides to paint something gigantic and beautiful
>puts it up on the billboard
>no one gives a shit
>the company that was advertising there doesn't even notice
>calls them to let them know
>they stop paying him
>calls his brother to show him the painting
>says its kinda pretty but not that much, it has no meaning, he doesn't really care about it
>months go by
>without the billboard rent he can barely make any money
>decides to end his life
>he lays a gigantic white layer of fabric in the garden, so cleaning after his body is easier
>he goes to the top of the billboard naked
>jumps
>some weeks after his brother enters the house
>sees the white canvas on the floor, and the dead organs of his brother splashed over the canvas
>"this is your magnum opus, little brother, it's the most beautiful and meaningful painting i've ever seen"

It's pretty ripe right now, I had the idea yesterday and there are some details I still want to figure out. What do you guys think of it?

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 16:12:24 2017 No.10036241 >>10036121 Kind of like a frogposter's fantasy. Overall, it's really not that bad, but I don't like the whole death ending. You're about 70 years too late to end a story with the protagonist killing themselves.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 17:56:12 2017 No.10036635 Half, or a third, would be about the depressing, hopeless and contrite life of a "neet". The rest being the neet's dynamic dreams, memories and imagination, spanning any and all genres.

>>	Anonymous Sun Sep 17 21:15:03 2017 No.10037286 >Demiurge has reset the world 14 times >Supercomputer powered by child sacrifice has a plan to break the cycle >YA

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 00:54:21 2017 No.10037980

>It's 1964
>Main character is a private detective in Los Angeles
>He lives in a world where the US and the USSR went to war during the Berlin Airlift, so the USSR no longer exists and America is a hyperpower
>There is currently a war scare between the US and Nationalist China, which won its civil war with the commies and promptly went fascist
>Both sides have nukes
>Things could go really badly if war breaks out
>Main character has taken a case from a business owner in Chinatown whose shop keeps getting vandalized
>Main character finds the vandal after following a trail of red paint through Chinatown and chases him onto the roof of a building
>He falls through a skylight and into a room
>There are two groups of dark suited men in the room, in the middle of a tense discussion
>Both sides draw guns on each other and the main character, convinced they've been betrayed
>The main character tries to explain what he was doing on the roof but it looks like he's about to be executed
>At that moment one of the suited men steps forward and the main character recognizes one of his old war buddies
>The war buddy defuses the situation and explains:
>The main character has crashed into the middle of negotiations between the Californian Democrats and GOP
>The mayoral candidates from both sides have mysteriously gone missing
>Both parties are convinced that the other side is to blame
>Oh right. It's an election year
>Noting that the main character is a private detective, the main character's war buddy presses him into service...at least partially to keep him from being killed by the politicos
>They now have to figure out what happened to the missing candidates before the public discovers that they're missing
>This is because if the news leaks then the Chinese will inevitably be blamed and there will likely be a pogrom against Los Angeles' Chinese population
>Neither party wants this...if only because they're afraid of losing voters
>The main character and his buddy set off and...that's all I've got so far

The alternate history wouldn't be too heavy. It'd be a little bit like The Yiddish Policeman's Union, where things are still mostly recognizable.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 01:15:31 2017 No.10038054 >>10035813 Topkek

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 01:35:27 2017 No.10038133 >Person is sad >A lot of people are sad >Get together with people who are sad >All of them decide to do something to make them less sad >Now they decide it would be better if they hadn't done it Read the first letter of each line

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 02:21:59 2017 No.10038274

>>10038133
>Untimely death of the prince spurs mass political upheavel
>Revolutionaries march through streets of Galowski, capital of the Pan-Slavic Empire
>Assassination of the rebel leader by a reactionary lone wolf causes large scale riots and small scale gun fights between police and revolutionaries
>Fearlessly, one man steps into the frey to prevent civil war
>A new king emerges
>Galowski has a new hero , and his name is

Read the first letter of every sentence

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 02:26:37 2017 No.10038287

>>10024996
>historical allegory for ancient Greece/Rome
>superpowered wizard/philosopher from a city's legendary past is rumoured to be on his way back
>everyone is freaking out
>ordinary everyman observes from afar
>religious leader plans something nefarious
>consul tries to keep city from collapsing

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 02:35:42 2017 No.10038314 >>10033410 It's super similar to body snatchers obviously, but I like that fact that he focuses on gathering evidence of just his friend, while not realizing that everyone else has already been changed. The tunnel vision seems sort of interesting.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 02:57:52 2017 No.10038360 >>10032427 man I really like this one. And I don't think it can only be a short story, more like a short book, like <100 pages. Please write it, or else I will.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 03:13:20 2017 No.10038394 >>10035813 topkek

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 03:17:20 2017 No.10038397

I don't have much just basic ideas about setting characters and motivations but here's some ideas
>Story about a guy tooling around in space unable to settle down or fit in anywhere
>No matter where he goes or what he does he just feels empty.
>Makes impressions on those he meets for better or worse
>He remains relatively unchanged despite his travels and encounters
>Maybe do some introspection about depression and loneliness despite his crazy life
Could even work some comedy into it.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 03:38:08 2017 No.10038427 >>10038397 >>He remains relatively unchanged despite his travels and encounters i think that would be make the book sorta pointless desu. otherwise could be an interesting concept

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 03:38:41 2017 No.10038428

>A asian girl in middle-school lives in some quasi-asian-1984 world but closer to Saudi Arabia in terms of religion
>Has another friend who has a crush on her, while she keeps trying to keep her (yes, its yuri) friend from trying to win her heart (because she want her like a friend)
>have to deal with a quasi-O'Brian teacher version of a religious police
>dont want to live in this dictatorial society but is way fearfull of going against the status quo
>uses all sorts of books to deal with her situacionista
>she may turn out to be what she hates the most in the end (i won't say because to spoily)

I actualy was writting this story in a fanfic site under the originals tab, but I may try to turn it into a bigger book.

What does /lit/ think of?

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 03:46:57 2017 No.10038440

>>10038427
>Makes the book pointless desu
That's fair, and I'm going to put a lot more work into this before I commit to putting anything down in writing.
I was originally thinking I'd have him do this incredible stuff or just make such a big impact on others, but he's so focused on feeling down or trying to find that missing piece to notice what he means to these people.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 07:51:52 2017 No.10038979

>kid in florida gets limited telekinesis
>decides to use it to visit the grand canyon
>can fly part of the way at a time with new abilities
>hijinks at each stop

Standard coming of age story for middle schoolers, thats where the critical acclaim is made ya know

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 08:43:22 2017 No.10039121

I don't have much just basic ideas about setting characters and motivations but here are some ideas

>Story about a Rogue mage tooling around trying to find ways on how to modernize and simplify magic in the modern age

>He is being hunted because of Rogue status no matter where he goes or what he does they just keep finding him.

>More or less does not give a fuck about the people hunting him and simply kills them first chance

>He remains steadfast about his ideals and philosophies

>Maybe delve deeper into the Urban fantasy genre: I.e How they keep the masquerade in the modern age, How supernatural groups get their funding, how they govern themselves and etc

Already got the first chapter.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 09:47:12 2017 No.10039302 >guy loses parts of body in various absurd accidents >replaces body parts with wooden limbs made by a sculpture >at last his body's entirely made out of wood >book ends with penis joke I'm thinking a Kafkaesque vibe

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 14:38:41 2017 No.10040399 >>10034952 Thanks. That's exactly the direction I imagined it.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 14:44:38 2017 No.10040428

>rhyming shrew lives in a magical animal world.
>gets himself in trouble with the wrong crowd, owes money to the wrong carnivores
>takes herbal remedies to calm himself from constant panic attacks and seizures.
>goes crazy and stabs up an illegal card game full of criminals
>turns out he's a mental patient in a 1950s asylum and has been abused and experimented on how whole life.
>whole book is written in the style of Dr Seuss until the last horrific chapter.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 16:29:25 2017 No.10040979

>Satirical parable of man's unquenchable desire to have an absolute answer to every posable philosophical dilemma
>Including eating food
>Individual man's psychotic breakdown/ultimate death by starvation as he tries (and fails) to find an answer as to why we need to eat food beyond, "For survival."

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 18:17:05 2017 No.10041475 I would totally read this. Ps. Fuck women those fucking roastbags. I chose to be a 32 yo virgin.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 18:18:46 2017 No.10041483 >>10041475 >>10026085

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 18:29:37 2017 No.10041531 >>10030966 Sounds dope. Have you though of the place?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 19:10:18 2017 No.10041642 >Journalist investigates a Luddite terrorist group >they're offing scientists and pro-technology politicians >by the end it's not clear who the bad guys are

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 19:17:46 2017 No.10041663 >>10041642 Transcendence without Johnny Depp?

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 19:25:28 2017 No.10041682

>>10041663
>Transcendence
hmm i had not heard of this picture before and there are some similarities but mine will be less mystical, but more spiritual if that makes sense. The technology is more realistic mechanistic robots not AI and singularity hooplah that are rapidly replacing huge numbers of jobs, particularly of the below average in IQ. The Journalist in question a self-consciously religious individual and will try to come to grips with the most basic question of all: What is the good life? and how it relates to his (and our's) rapidly changing world.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 19:26:26 2017 No.10041685 >>10033763 this is mine, what can I add to make it more interesting? make the main character a priest?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 19:34:03 2017 No.10041709 >>10041685 i think it would make more sense if he was alerted by some island natives who control and understand the magic instead of some extra dimensional thing. Ockam's razor and all that

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 19:43:10 2017 No.10041743
File: 6 KB, 251x200, milk.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10024996
>Guy has a spoiled packet of milk in his fridge
>Is super cleanly but somehow just isnt able to throw the old milk packet away
>Ends up talking to the packet and forming emotional bond
>starts feeding it by shoving meat and vegetables into the packet and keeping it warm with blankets etc.
>several days pass with romance between guy and milk carton.
>becomes more and more delusional
>starts bothering his neighbors and they call police
>police come and and knock and ultimately brake down his door
>Guy tries to safe his precious milk by drinking the mix of rotten milk, meat and veggies
>Guy maybe dies

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 20:12:47 2017 No.10041840 if you remember me, then I don't care if everyone else forgets.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 20:17:45 2017 No.10041855

>a young man locks himself in his apartment, aiming to remain untainted by the world long enough to become a wizard
>unbeknownst to him, he is about to be summoned to another dimension to handily defeat the demon king and be rewarded with a harem of beautiful girls
>the princess has been tasked with whisking him there, using a crystal that will teleport her and anyone she touches to the royal court
>he won't open the fucking door
>shenanigans ensue

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 20:32:58 2017 No.10041907 >>10041855 he won't open the door because he finds her offer not tempting? this is a comedy i'm guessing?

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 20:37:26 2017 No.10041924

please no bully
>average suburban man with wife and kids
>comes home from white collar corporate job oneday
>goes to sleep aftter having sex with wife and eating with family
>wakes up in the middle of the night goes to the bathroom mirror
>cant see himself anymore
>feels freedom for once
>Kills and Rapes multiple homeless men, prostitutes and losers
>goes home to wife and sleeps the rest of the night

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 21:39:58 2017 No.10042112 >>10041924 Could work as a critique about the middle class raping the lower classes and being able to sleep it off.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 21:56:03 2017 No.10042159

>>10036121
meh. story of men struggling to find relevance/ recognition for their work has been done to death. Don't let that stop you if you feel passionate about it. However i don't like the ending. Suicidal artists is a dead meme that even plebs are sick of.

>>10037980
i like it, though i'm not a fan of the mc stumbling upon the GOP and Dems. Feels a little too contrived. maybe just have him get hired by his old war buddy instead?

>>10038287
gonna need more details than that, cause it just sounds like your standard latro fantasy knock off

>>10038397
sounds a lot like doctor who

>>10038428
sounds alright, but it doesn't sound like my cup of tea. really depends on the themes you plan on exploring and where you take the plot.

>>10038979
sure, sounds like it could be cute

>>10039121
sounds kind of meh to me. However, i'd be interested enough to at least take a look at the first chapter. make sure it's a real kicker cause the premise is a little bland. doesn't mean the story will turn out that way though.

>>10039302
depending on how long it is i could get behind it.

>>10040428
i dunno anon, i like the idea of a magical animal world with an anxiety plagued shrew getting caught up in the seedy criminal underworld a lot more without the insane asylum meme twist at the end.

>>10040979
would read if it wasn't too long. if there are plot lines that extend beyond this character, then length wouldn't be an issue.

>>10041743
eeehhhhhhh

>>10041855
>meh, could be ok with it if the shenanigans were top notch.

>>10041924
like he turns invisible?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:03:38 2017 No.10042177 >>10040979 but the obvious answer is that man eats specific things in an attempt to sculpt his body and make himself feel better

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:06:20 2017 No.10042189 >>10042159 >like he turns invisible? no he just believes he's invisible

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:08:32 2017 No.10042198

>>10040428
your book is better without the twist.
giving something cheery a dark or seedy underbelly is a guilty pleasure of the western audience

The "he was crazy the whole time" meme was done best by Shutter Island. If you like that twist though, make another plot to suit it. Something cheerful is fine, but dont make the cheerful world more interesting than the real world. The reader wants to spend be involved more with the interesting thing. Perhaps the cheerful world could be purposefully one-dimensional and bland, the non-offensive kind of 'safe' that advertisers go nowadays. When the (plot device) starts wearing off, the world starts becoming more realistic and therefore threatening.
Could also be making a statement about those who want a 'safe space' so badly

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:10:27 2017 No.10042206

>nonlinear narrative
>civil war soldier starts doing drugs to deal with the war
>gets hooked on them
>turns to crime after the war to support his habit
>he and cohorts do horrible things in order to get their hands on drugs
>MC gets sold out by fellow outlaw to collect bounty to pay for drugs
>eventually escapes prison and works on cleaning himself up
>starts work as a mustang tamer out west
>occasionally suffers from phantom highs where he hallucinates
>is able to take a special drug that helps keep them in check
----Story starts here and jumps back and forth between the past and present-----
>out working in Nevada with fellows one day they are attacked by Indians
>MC is the sole survivor
>Believes one of the horses he caught is now leading him to a hidden oasis in the middle of the desert that'll save his life
>isn't able to distinguish between what is real and what is a drug trip because he lost all his medicine
>has to avoid the wild life and indians
>encounters some bandits and he believes one of them is his old friend who sold him out
>tries to kill him and angers the rest of them
>has to run from them now as well
>horse actually does end up leading him to an Oasis
>restocks there and is able to overcome his phantom highs (medicine was just snake oil, a placebo)
>then has to defend it against the bandits that followed him
>kills/ drives them off and kills his traitor in a duel
>heads back towards civilization, leaving the horse to run free in the oasis

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:21:52 2017 No.10042224
File: 1.99 MB, 448x252, 1501245387506.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10042206
>leaving a horse behind to walk through the desert
If it's supposed to be a poetic suicide like taking off your shoes before walking into a lake then I suppose it's fine

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:26:00 2017 No.10042237 >guy can only discriminate objects based on what they are (the ball is blue) >gal can only discriminate objects based on what they are not (the ball isn't red) >they meet up and fall in love It is just a silly story for kids desu.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:27:16 2017 No.10042243

>>10042224
yeah I wanted it to be like a character suicide of sorts. like he'd never let anything go to waste so long as he could use it in some way. Him leaving the horse is supposed to be the final nail in the coffin for his old self.

if that sounds like a stretch though just let me know.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:27:44 2017 No.10042244

>Man starts having recurring dreams of co-hosting the Jimmy Kimmel show
>As time goes by they keep getting longer and more vivid
>Eventually it feels like he spends as much time fantasizing as he does actually living
>MC is aware of what is and isn't reality
>Slowly gets more and more attached to the idea
>Eventually he desperately wants this dream to be true
>Will do anything to make it happen
>After a lot of effort and a few morally questionable acts he actually gets a meeting with Kimmel
>Meeting goes great
>They film an episode that night
>MC wakes up next day
>Can't decide to end it with MC in the previous co- hosts bed, next to his murdered corpse realizing it's all a dream and him killing himself or the MC just wakes up alone, realizes it was a dream and kills himself

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:41:00 2017 No.10042270 >>10042244 this sounds a lot like The King of Comedy. Also really sounds like a joke post I made a while ago, in a thread just like this, where I described my idea as being exactly the same as The King of Comedy.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:44:51 2017 No.10042278

>Early 19th century Balkans under Ottoman Empire
>Empire and society in decay
>Three young serbs that live in a small village near the borderlands with the austrian empire
>One gets into an argument with an abusive turkish tax collector
>Three of them savagely beat the tax collector, rob him and destroy his carriage
>tax collector alerts jannisaries
>Three go on the run into the woods
>Their village gets sacked in retaliation
>All of the village people hate the three boys now, they are also wanted by authorities
>The three are forced into being semi-hajduks for a while
>They get into a skirmish with Ottoman officials hunting them
>One of them gets killed or something
>The rest eventually escape to Austria temporarily

I haven't thought of a good ending though, I kind of want them to go back into Ottoman territory one more time. I was thinking that they attempt to rouse up a nationalist insurrection and fail miserably and the story ends with them in exile. The reason why it fails is because they were petty criminals at their very core and attempted to mold themselves into heroic figures to try to redeem themselves, a sort of "feet of clay" allegory. Thoughts?

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:47:01 2017 No.10042282

>>10042159
>gonna need more details than that, cause it just sounds like your standard latro fantasy knock off
it's not really a fantasy. There's almost no magic until a tiny bit the very end really. more of a mystery/political thriller set in a pre-industrial setting.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:48:19 2017 No.10042289 >>10042244 wont sell well, but will inspire jimmy kimmel to get bodyguard >>10042278 i like that it will be very bleak >>10042237 10/10 kids story

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 22:57:16 2017 No.10042313

>>10042243
It's only a stretch if you dont foreshadow it. Be very obvious about it. Youre not giving anything away. I find that when it comes to characters giving up/committing suicide, the best route is to make it painful and drawn out, give the reader the chance to think "no, please dont go"

if you want a great example of how to do this, Lin's fate from Perdido Street Station, the "Lin was an artist" repetition towards the end, does it well. Dont drone on, but make it clear that this fate, while tragic, is unavoidable.

Anonymous Mon Sep 18 23:04:10 2017 No.10042336

>Man has medical condition in which he has 5 days to live
>Man starts questioning time, and whether the observance of it will decrease his life span
>Proceeds to never check a clock and do everything he wants
>Finally dies in the middle of something fun he wanted to do, realizing that though time passed slower without observing it, the order that observing time allows would have let him do more things if scheduled.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 23:07:57 2017 No.10042346 >>10042336 >time flies when youre having fun but scheduling things is efficient not to be rude but that is bland as fuck

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 23:16:38 2017 No.10042372 >>10042346 So is every book from the last 40 years.

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 23:20:01 2017 No.10042383 >>10042372 How did you manage to read so many?

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 23:25:32 2017 No.10042400 >>10042383 Magic

>>	Anonymous Mon Sep 18 23:41:07 2017 No.10042436 >>10042313 gotcha, thanks for the input anon!

Anonymous Tue Sep 19 00:48:21 2017 No.10042658

My working title is "sirens." It's about the Sirens that call to the main character and/or narrator (not sure if I want this to be in the first or third person) including women, violence, drugs, whatever, as well as the sirens of emergency response and the warning sirens (I don't know, like tornado or air raid sirens) that society is decaying, possibly some big climactic event that does us in. If that sounds half-baked and up its own ass, that's because it is. But it's a starting point, maybe too big for me until I can refine it.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:00:18 2017 No.10042699 >>10042658 Just one comment on how it's coming out so far: it's basically a hallucinatory embellishment of my 20's so far. But I want to make it something more.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:03:49 2017 No.10042711 >>10042658 >society is decaying Wowe so original. I wish more people would write about such a groundbreaking observation, outside of all the millions who did it for millennia of course.

Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:08:37 2017 No.10042724

>a young man from an aristocratic family joins the military with his friends to escape a dying society
>as society basically explodes (possibly literally) he leaves and settles on a post-apocalyptic frontier planet with his friends
>eventually becomes King/Godhead/literal Godman

from the greentext, my obvious concern is that it sounds too much like dune, but w/e

i want it to be intensely spiritual, so if its gonna be like any dune i would prefer for it to be lynch's dune

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:10:08 2017 No.10042730 >>10042699 >wowe so uriginal if only people hadn't been doing that for milennia Literally every general idea ever. What are you writing by the way fampai?

Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:13:53 2017 No.10042742

Thinking of a short story in Vietnam. Just in the idea phase. I haven't written anything yet so I figure short form is a decent place to start.
> 3 drafted men with varied views on the war.
> One is apathetic, and the other two are obviously for, and against.
> Their deaths are foreshadowed when they all light their cigarettes off of one match (Three on a Match) except either 2 of them or all of them die.
> As they try to escape an ambush their actual brotherhood shows through despite being at odds with each other in regular conversation
> Ends with the survivor at an old age remarking on how he's never been closer to anyone.
Just a story about American bonds of brotherhood, something simple.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:15:50 2017 No.10042744 >>10031973 Make him fall in love with an exotic goddess and her happy puppy. He's actually scott free at this point but he ends up POISONING THEIR LIVES WITH HIS INABILITY TO LET GO OF THE PAST YOU'RE FUCKING WELCOME ANON

Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:17:47 2017 No.10042750

>>10042730
It's less about the idea but more about the observation gained, you can reuse an idea thousand of times but come to different observations each time. If you share even that, the way to stand out are pretty limited and it's very unlikely that you'll find a new approach to say shit that was already said so often.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:19:26 2017 No.10042751 >>10042742 Nothing amazing but functional enough for a short story. Why do you want to write it?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:25:30 2017 No.10042768 >>10042750 I won't even say you're wrong that I won't find a new way of approaching the idea, but that is what I'm trying to do. As much as it may sound like it, I'm not going for a rehash of Taxi Driver or something if I can help it.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:36:37 2017 No.10042791 >>10042751 Part practice, and I've always been interested in darker military stories.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 01:47:03 2017 No.10042820 >>10042768 Well, the only downside in trying is that you could've possibly used the time on something better but as long you enjoy it, who cares. How unlikely it might be, perhaps you'd get to the desired result.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 02:30:33 2017 No.10042922 >tfw too old to become a great master of writing Do you guys think I can get away with just retelling old stories with rapacious themes tacked on?

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 02:54:25 2017 No.10042963 >>10042922 >too old to become a great master of writing know such thing anon. it's not like learning an instrument where you have to implant certain pre-rational instincts into your brain when it's young and plastic to be truly great.

Anonymous Tue Sep 19 05:32:56 2017 No.10043392 [DELETED]

>>10024996
>an r9kesque incel weirdo crossdresses into a girl
>manages to trick a drunk man into thinking hes a female, drugs him
>walks him to a remote area
>kills him later by stuffing gravel into his mouth and dropping a brick on to his face multiple times

Anonymous Tue Sep 19 06:30:18 2017 No.10043528

>>10024996
>Fantasy story using RPG elements
>Magic is pivotal to the plot
>To summarise, classes are inherited by either the mother or the father but rarely a child will inherit both classes which merges into one brand new class
>Due to the rarity of this occurring many powerful kings and the like who bear extremely powerful classes will find their newborn child lacks the magic of the mother or their father which of course makes them believe that their wives cheated on them. resulting in the child and mother being executed for her vile sin
>In general the culture of magic in the story is heavily against scientific research into how magic works which has stunted their growth in some areas of society while in other areas this version of the earth is far more advanced due to magic
>The main plot focuses on a young boy who is the son of a blacksmith and mage who discovers his creations have magical properties to them i.e arcanesmithing
>Due to his understanding of the implications, he keeps his mouth shut and wishes to discover if his father is his or not
>Typical RPG shit happens where the bad guys of the story fuck shit up and the protagonist has to leave home on a journey
>Main villains of the story are typical craftsmen or merchants who grew dissatisfied with their society and use their skills and science to create mechanical monsters and weapons of mass destruction to create a revolution
>World in general has a mix of magic and technology conflicting with one another and the protagonists own struggles to understand his world and deal with his own flaws and beliefs

tl:dr RPG fantasy story with differences such as a bigoted society built on magic and a terrorist organisation built on technology facing each other off with the implications of a society of magic users who loath science or truly trying to understand their abilities resulting in numerous screwed up traditions and rules conflicting with the increasingly violent and amoral scientist terrorists whom seek revolution.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 13:45:59 2017 No.10044827 >>10035999 Anyone, look at my story and give critique, please.

>>	Anonymous Tue Sep 19 18:04:28 2017 No.10045924 >>10043528 Totally not my genre but it sounds interesting enough, the formulaic bits and boring protagonist (from the info given) are quite the turn off though.

Anonymous Tue Sep 19 22:37:35 2017 No.10046856 [SPOILER]

File: 19 KB, 220x220, 1505875055942.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10034939
sure i wont, goyim

but really, i like you're idea. i'd definitely watch it based on the premise (if of course the acting and directing was done well too)

i'd say that you should put the fire scene at the end. it can still be bitter sweet with maybe something being present in the first story getting burnt down (a tree planted in 1890 that two lovers carved their initials in during the 20's, etc etc) but the idea that the town comes together to put it out would be a good bit of positivity to book end it on.

Anonymous Tue Sep 19 22:46:41 2017 No.10046883

>We Who Breath
>everyone has the same power to mold and shape matter around them
>parents skillfully design their babies
>main character of the story was disfigured by his father before his father killed himself
>main character is an apprentice to a man who specializes in specially designed single task creatures
>an example would be create a weasel like creature that filter feeds algae from water while pumping it via undulation of its digestive system and using that to pump clean drinking water
>main character is viewed with scorn and disgust because of his deformities
>main character holds secret ambition of leave his local tower (human society exists in small towers) and going to the central block
>main character dreams of being named a Torgal Artisan, essentially the best artisans in the world
>main character slowly works on his magnum opus, a human consciousness recreated in discarded flesh
>story is mainly centered around the character's move to the main spire, being named an artisan, and the horrors that await him after
>includes politics among the artisans, the fact he created what is technically blaspheme, and other bullshit

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 01:56:06 2017 No.10047379 >>10046883 His father intentionally scarring his son before taking his own life in this world actually seems really interesting. I like the idea.

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 03:29:16 2017 No.10047590 >>10033410 literally The World's End movie

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 03:43:48 2017 No.10047607
File: 649 KB, 1350x950, eb71ed02f2dfe1ac07306c37c886f24c706af96c.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>main character has anxiety and no job or friends
>doesn't go outside often
>leaves his den come evening to buy a new video game just before the store closes (fewer people)
>sees a cute girl about to be hit by a truck
>sacrifices his life to save her
>is rewarded for his deed by a goddess
>she lets him reincarnate in another dimension similar to the MMO he just purchased
>it's a medieval fantasy realm where he is destined to save the land
>he gets by using his modern knowledge and familiarity with game logic which the world strangely follows
What do you guys think? I know it's been done before but I'm adapting it for a western audience.

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 03:54:48 2017 No.10047625 >>10047607 kill yourself, weeb

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 04:53:09 2017 No.10047736 >>10047607 Well, definitely not something I'd touch because loser protagonists are irredeemable lame but objectively it's a very solid stuff, specially if you raise the stakes further.

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 04:59:13 2017 No.10047747

>>10043528
i like it, but there is one thing: what kind of magic? I mean if the magic is some kind of supernatural shit, how is it balanced against technology... wouldn't the magic always be stronger?

This is what bugs me with most magic stories. They have magic powers, but somehow they are not using it all the time? They could fuck shit up, but decide not to.. why?

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 07:44:08 2017 No.10048059

>>10047607
being transferred to an MMO setting is nothing new to a western audience
>even non-anime people are familiar with SAO
>see the castle in the attic
>Chronicles of Narnia to a lesser extent

if you wanna write it, that's fine. but don't bank on the idea of it being new to Eurofags and Amerifats.

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 09:56:19 2017 No.10048379 >>10046856 Intersting idea, thanks! Also wanted to add something like original sin throughout urban legend.

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 10:02:09 2017 No.10048401

>>10047607
What is the main motivation for the MC to save the land?
It's rather generic but you'll have to add more 3dmentionality to your characters. You can't get away with Japanese tropes of MC being the chosen one and power of friendship. Furthermore, cute girls wanting MC's cock because somehow nobody have treated them kindly is rather unbelievable in western fantasy culture.

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 10:04:56 2017 No.10048410 >>10048379 Would it be too much of muh symbolism

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 10:28:57 2017 No.10048471 >>10048410 be cautious about it, but my motto is that if you're already second guessing it then you should toss the idea.

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 10:56:47 2017 No.10048527 >>10032316 >plot-twist - he can't kill himself because he no longer has a chair or rope

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 12:22:32 2017 No.10048836

>man born blind
>due to technical advances he is able to gain his vision through an experimental procedure
>ends up being able to see energy manifested as bright flashes of light
>able to see energy's displacement through time (aka able to see things before they happen. A train going down tracks would be forseen as long ribbons of bright light kind of like what is seen in a long exposure photo).
>Man keeps seeing tragedies before they happen but is unable to act because the lights blind him
>Eventually ends up being unable to handle his new gift of vision
>walks towards the light, i.e. kills himself by walking in front of a truck or something like that

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 13:07:42 2017 No.10048967

I'm gonna describe it because I don't know how to greentext it properly.

I can separate the narrative into three groups of short stories:

>Inspector
>Physician
>Victim

The general idea is of an inspector for asylums in pre-WWI England. He is an employee of the british government sent to different asylums under the guise of an inspector when he is actually given specific criteria for patients to send back. He does not know what he is sending them back for or why, merely that the government wants them for something. Each story is of a different asylum and a different patient, or of a small portion of his life. Each story is not in chronological order but takes place over the course of two years between 1913 and 1914, just before than just as WWI begins. The Inspector is never named, merely referred to as Inspector. You find out over the course of the short stories that he suffers from severe OCD which caused the death of his mother and cost him his marriage. Part 1 ends when someone he was to send to the government commits suicide and he breaks under the pressure.

Part 2, physician occurs two years after Inspector after the main character put in to change positions and serve in the British military. He serves as a field position. Part 2 takes place between 1916 and 1917. In this he in fact reconnects with a few of the individuals he sent to the British government and is introduced to the ideas of 'The Light Shining Behind Their Eyes" and "A Connection Between Two Unlike Things'. Basically British occultism enforced upon mental patients. This chronicles further segregation of his life and his daughter's disowning of him, and how it sends him further into depression while being surrounded by the horrors of WWI.

Part 3 is the point at which he discovers the truth behind what those he sent to the government endured and why he was chosen in the first place. How his life, his wife, and his existence was on a course predetermined. This takes between 1919 and 1921 after WWI and mainly chronicles the main character as a homeless man in war torn Germany hiding from the British government.

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 13:48:13 2017 No.10049099

>>10024996
It's a story about a high school chick who falls in love with some monster. I dunno. Maybe a werewolf or a skeleton. And it's the post apocalypse. Then these sacrifical games begin where they fight other monsters to survive, then one has to sacrifice themselves to save the other and I get a royalty check from Warner Bros

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 13:53:02 2017 No.10049114 >>10047607 Thats just [insert generic anime based on MMO here]

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 14:07:18 2017 No.10049167
File: 16 KB, 320x248, Illuminati Reptile.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>wealthy family, high brow editor and jouralist from large and well respected news firm
>always known something's up because of job and required "censorship" (lies by omission) [world is supposed to be set in what could be 2040, sleek aesthetic, cyberpunk feel]
>does psilocybin-esque drug
>realizes how he has to take an active stance if anything is to change
>slowly becomes increasingly redpilled [journey that goes on through the entire book, it'll be obvious that the main character is actually redpilled and not delusional or schizo]
>moves up the corporate ladder by essentially assassianting co-workers under the guise of an ongoing civil war
>3/4s into the book the main character is at the the head of the company, and through the companys info's established without doubt that something akin to this (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fAh0r4C6Q2Q&t=300s)) is reality
>goes on a memetic war against the memeto-matrix
>technology has taken the form of new-age occultism
>book ends with our guy becoming the personal manifestation of the revolt fighting a psychic multi-dimensional war against the current order
>guy "loses", and everything is restored to normal (first line)
>guy somehow remembers
>kills himself

bit hard to explain here, as greentexts is essentially the opposite of what im going for, but as the book goes on the writing very very slowly shifts, starts with somewhat esoteric vocabulary being added (nothing someone who's read nick land wouldnt get) vocabulary, then it progressively becomes more and more archaic in its writing style, then i use the last 500 pages to establish a new case-system which essentially hard-codes rhyming into the language, all leading up to the final fight and suicide, which will be entirely written in poetry.

Anonymous Wed Sep 20 21:14:06 2017 No.10050840

>Dude resents the inacuracies of human language
>decides the language of animals is brutal, simplistic, but precise and understanding
>dude abandons normal life, goes to a cabin in the woods
>dude builds an altar made of mutilated animals he's hunted
>dude cuts his tongue out
>The end

>>	Anonymous Wed Sep 20 22:33:48 2017 No.10051109 JUST finished a short story about a father who's taking his son fly fishing because he's worried his son is gay

Anonymous Thu Sep 21 00:39:32 2017 No.10051397
File: 71 KB, 548x800, Goya_witches_sabbath_1798.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

Short story or novella
>Low fantasy world
>Rare docile creature wanders into town
>It carries a disease spread by touch that wipes the village out except for one man who unknowingly becomes a carrier of the disease
>He is driven mad, and brutally slaughters the animal
>As he wanders from village to village searching for more of the animals he spreads the disease.
>Group of men is dispatched to deal with him after they see the destruction he's left in his wake.
>They find him, and he attempts to fight them off at first
>He realizes what he's been doing in his quest for revenge, and is overcome with despair
>They execute him and set on their journey back.

Anonymous Thu Sep 21 02:24:06 2017 No.10051607

>>10024996
>a man awakens to a room which is lit only by a flickering torch
>as he stumbles down its winding corridors he discovers more rooms
>videogame-esque monsters inhabit each of these rooms but he also discovers other humanoids (from different worlds to his own) and as he descends into the labyrinth he finds more and more and his party grows and grows
>despair kicks in, and the further the party gets, the more powerful the monsters
>people die, minds break, they descend into chaos
>he awakens once more to a room which is lit only by a flickering torch

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 21 10:42:22 2017 No.10052818 >>10048836 dumb >>10049167 good luck pulling that off >>10050840 shit >>10051397 is there something i dont understand here? 0/10 >>10051607 >2017 >circular plot

>>	soma !!1pMpfJu9Pyw Thu Sep 21 10:48:34 2017 No.10052840 >>10028920 isnt this just molloy

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 21 11:21:08 2017 No.10053009 >>10026085 This is a great idea, but you have to avoid seeming like a /pol/tard

Anonymous Thu Sep 21 11:32:02 2017 No.10053060

>Young woman has sister who has two kids. Also has one handsome cop friend who gets into a fight with.
>Young woman thinks herself too smart for love relationships or having kids for herself
>Older sister is kill by her husband's goons. Her son and daughter are sent to young woman not knowing what happened to her
>Young woman meet kids
>"Fuck off kids, i don't know you".
>She still feeds them anyways because she isn't a horrible person after all
>Husband goon reaches them, beats and tortures young woman and asks for kids back
>"Oh God i'm dead. I deserve this. Just don't hurt kids"
>Kid disables goon until handsome cop arrives
>"Thanks kid. Now fuck off to you mom now"
>"But i'm coming with you :)"

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 21 12:20:57 2017 No.10053212 >>10052818 Are you going to elaborate on anything or just make random comments

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 21 12:44:30 2017 No.10053284 >>10053212 are you gonna amount to anything or just be a loser faggot

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 21 21:02:00 2017 No.10054839 bump for opinions

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 21 21:21:03 2017 No.10054898 >>10024996 >Fat Jewish guy >His wife is cucking him >He wanders around town >Goes to a funeral >Jacks off to some chick at the beach >Meets up here and there with a moody artist guy >Last chapter is the wife ranting to herself What do ya think

Anonymous Thu Sep 21 21:42:01 2017 No.10054970

>>10054898
We've been there already, James.

>>10053060
>Young woman thinks herself too smart for love relationships or having kids for herself
This has potential to be interesting.
>Kid disables goon until handsome cop arrives
Meh.
>"But i'm coming with you :)"
No.

>>10051607
Sounds boring. What's the point?

>>10051397
Pure mediocrity but a complete story that can work.

>>10051109
Will they fuck?

>>10050840
Somewhat interesting.

>>10049167
It starts off interesting enough and goes into memes overload. Guess I am just not the target audience.

>>10048967
I remember this from couple threads ago. Sounds like a good and well thought out story, and still absolutely not my cup of tea.

>>10048836
Decent idea with the power, shit story with a dumb ending.

>>10046883
What's the limit to this ability? The world building just doesn't work for me ... if people had such a power, I am not buying that society would resemble ours in the slightest. Otherwise it sounds decent though.

>>	Anonymous Thu Sep 21 22:59:20 2017 No.10055265 >>10054970 meanie!

Anonymous Fri Sep 22 01:15:02 2017 No.10055758

>A college guy temporarily drops out of school because his ex girlfriend had a secret abortion and he didn't take it well when he found out
>Tries to impress her by pretending to be a sick DJ
>Creates fake profile, throws underground "parties" that don't actually happen
>Talks himself up on message boards, writes rave reviews of non-existent songs played live at secret, 2hip4u raves
>Gets more and more involved in the cyber world pretending
>3hip5u bloggers and "journalists" pick up the story, writing about his mystique
>some even pretend to have been to his shows
>record company comes knocking
>they know he's full of shit, but they don't care
>they hype him as the producer of an already finished album by a girl pop singer
>his style, personality, and look are all curated by them
>label organizes a fake relationship, so they're staying together but barely interacting, and public appearances are scripted down to the hand movement

and so on and so forth. It's basically taking the posturing that people do on social media to such a extreme that it consumes every aspect of life, until he snaps and things really get wild.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 22 01:17:50 2017 No.10055768 >>10055758 that sounds p sick brah, i always wanted to write some shit like that where everything that happens is actually just a marketing gimmick, like everything is just to increase brand awareness or increase tourism or whatever

Anonymous Fri Sep 22 01:24:15 2017 No.10055793
File: 15 KB, 309x475, 3116TMWBPML.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]

>>10055768

Thanks, friend. It's kind of a rip-off in spirit of Homo Zapiens. Only in the vaguest sense of things, but if you're interested in the whole "everything that happens is actually just a marketing gimmick" thing, the book is pretty cool. Nobody would ever call me on it or even notice, probably, but yeah.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 22 01:59:00 2017 No.10055875 >>10055758 Very cute idea but a convincing execution will be very tricky. It's easy to step over the line from funny to laughable.

Anonymous Fri Sep 22 06:04:02 2017 No.10056413

>Teenage phychosis patient recently out and recovering
>attempts to combat years of social exile by attending a house party
>becomes infatuated with qt andro twink slut
>qt andro twink slut lures innocent crazy boy into a brand new world utterly devoid of law love and longing
>over the months their relationship solidifies and they find themselves on the doorstep of an enigmatic cult
>said cult entices the boys with doctrines of strength pleasure and freedom
>dumb fucks bite like pit bulls and are sent on a five year pilgrimage around the world
>qt andro twink slut grows reliant on crazy boy and slowly phases out of the andro twink slut to become crazy boys qt
>crazy boy grows equally reliant on qt to keep him grounded within the whirling world of the occult and becomes qt's reliable boy
>qt learns love and happiness as opposed to sex and pleasure
>boy works on his psychosis in the most difficult environment imaginable
>textbook sad and unexpected ending that solidifies early twenties boy into a well traveled solemn man and leaves the fate of qt unknown but hopeful

Thoughts?

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 22 06:08:49 2017 No.10056424 Pity Bump

Anonymous Fri Sep 22 09:30:08 2017 No.10056914

>>10054970
>This has potential to be interesting.
Ultimately, is about her learning that the smart decisions doesn't necessarily leads to happiness and peace of mind. Still, I would like to know what other people think and what should I change for future references.

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 22 10:23:09 2017 No.10057033 >>10056413 It wasn't required for the MC to be a psycho on rehab, was it?

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 22 10:55:00 2017 No.10057143 It doesn't have a plot, because I'm only pretending to work on it

>>	Anonymous Fri Sep 22 12:55:24 2017 No.10057506 >>10057033 Phychosis, and yes.

Advanced search
Text to find
Subject [?]Search by post subject. Leave empty for any.
Username [?]Search for user name. Leave empty for any user name.
Tripcode [?]Search for tripcode. Leave empty for any.
Email [?]Search by email. Leave empty for any.
Filename [?]Search by image filename. Leave empty for any.
From Date [?]Enter what date to start searching from. Format is YYYY-MM-DD
To Date [?]Enter what date to start searching until. Format is YYYY-MM-DD
Image hash
Search in	All Posts OPs Only
Deleted posts	Show all posts Show only deleted posts Only show non-deleted posts
Internal posts	Show all posts Show only internal posts Show only archived posts
Order	New posts first Old posts first
Capcode	All Posts Only by Users Only by Mods Only by Admins Only by Developers
Results	Posts Threads
Action	[ Simple ]

/lit/ - Literature