/lit/ - Literature

Boobs

>>20243843
I hate dating. You waste money on consooming with an annoying self-centred midwit and all you get in return is pussy - usually disappointing and used by dozen guys before you. Do any men actually enjoy this or do they just need the ego boost?

https://youtu.be/csRNPEpgmiY
This is greatest work of art ever conceived by God.

>>20243967
*by man

>>20243843
Came across an academic article using the term "unskinny" instead of "fat".

>>20244053
I like that word, especially if I split the syllables differently
Unsk-inny

>>20243843
Eating pussay

>>20243843
You know, I actually am hopeful. Delusional, sometimes, and morose in musing self-indulgent, yeah, but hopeful. Something in it sticks like a burr, you know? Artery pump the thistles painful and 'care' has never been my strongsuit but goddammit it just wiggles in regardless. Something in the way life moves before me like some colour whirlwind; like wheat fields passing outside the bullet train on my way to work. I am just so unequivocally happy to be here that it hurts.

>>20243967
Sublime

>>20244053
What's even the fucking point? Unskinny will immediately be translated as fat, and will immediately take on the exact same connotations and pejorative nature when their doctor tells them their foot needs to be amputated due to their diabetes from being "unskinny". Same trajectory as mongoloid->retarded->intellectually disabled.

Everything wrong with the current man and our society in one image.

is there a reasonable argument to be made that this is partly the result of legalizing weed?

>>20244303
legal weed creates q laissez-faire attitude toward drugs in general leads to lax enforcement of drug laws leads to refusing to prosecute leads to vagrants shitting on the street with impunity. obviously more complex then that, but there's a definite condition

>>20244303
no lol

>>20244303
No what made it worse was blm and covid. They are barely starting to dismantle some of the camps on skid row but that's a drop in the ocean now that there are homeless camps all over la county in places where they weren't before.

>>20244336
I meant outside of skid row.

>>20244303
problem is california is like americas rectum, mistakenly and desperately trying to keep the feces in.
>free meth and fentanyl
>at the bottom of the sea
let the poo out, california

>>20243966
Women are like broken records, delicate like disks too.

I dated a crazy cat lady who had so many issues. I know that goes without saying but this one: pet racoon even. It learned to eat with a knife and fork and expect well cooked meals. All the red flags turned me on. She didn't brush her Britbong tier teeth. All this disturbed me. She's by far the craziest woman Ive ever been with, the hottest too. Every horrible defect wriggled in my heart sympathy and intrigue. She had a perfect figure yet she dressed like a past century British pauper. She wasnt content with me as confident powerhouse alpha master me, no only cuddly castrati who wont get up when the cat sits on my lap. Who grovels on the phone like a worm beta bitch made SIMP. She would whine and hiss at me when I was my normal many self and she would love bomb me upon begging and pleading and defacing myself. Turns out she had a full stable of serotonin depleted losers. It felt like some industrial plot twist. After not hearing from her on the phone for a while I sent her a love letter just to beg to see in her person one last time and she started giving me one word responses that weren't dismissive but the weakest bare minimum "hmm". I was like an incense stick lit but left to burn to myself. Im sure if I showed a new low I could see her. Only the self sacrificing cult of simps get to see madame of the not-neverland ranch.

>>20244388
Why do that to yourself

My world view was so warped by illusions when I was younger, a complete lack of understanding of how the world works.
I had to learn by the worst way, if only I could go back in time.

>>20244439
Yeah same. I didn’t realize how cold the world was until it was too late.

>>20244439
Rather than entering the maze from above and seeing others make wrong turns you make wrong turns with them.

>>20243843
I'm unemployed. I have no friends. I need to lose weight. I jack off every day. I obsessively desire a gf. I have mostly spent this entire pandemic indoors. I have insomnia. I procrastinate on something as simple as community college. This is what's on my mind: failure.

For one to improve, first one has to believe they can get better. Do you think you can get better?

>>20244416
She was a damaged danger zone peak.
Hairdressers are wild. The last crazy hot girl I seduced introduced me to her kids and the pets (that she chemically tortures in front of her children (she then blames her son for the dead guinea pigs) in boastful pride).
This is the price you pay for the most voluptuous feminine females. The lack of any grounding male element makes them dog fucking incestuous maniac hellspawn. This hairdresser was horror movie tier. This crazy cat lady cashier had no cruelty to her. Cruel, sensual, malicious thoughts. Ah look where that got me.

>>20244618
That hairdresser was glamor model tier.
I think Momokun and Gianna Michaels are maxing out the hotness and minimizing their craziness for peak performance. I have yet to find my little hellraiser.

>>20244303
it's obscene for weed to be illegal when the majority can use it responsibly. but how many fentanyl and meth addled homeless started with weed? is it not inevitable that they gravitate to a nicer climate and friendly gov?

The first thing that happened when I sat down at my desk this morning was my boss showing me his newest NFT. "Hit big on another", he smirked as he pulled out my phone and showed me a picture of a cute cartoon rat. A week ago he bought it for $400, he said, it's now worth 40 times that. He protects his investments on a hardware crypto wallet. He wears it around his neck. I want to choke him with the lanyard.

My dates this spring have led to nothing, mostly. One declined a 2nd date. Another said she'd like to see me again, then went out of town for a few weeks. I'm sure if she'll ever be back. Each one playing out like a premature divorce in my head, after a week of dating, becoming overly attached, clinging to the thought of them as they disappear into the next notification on my phone, a new match, wife, ready to meet. The last week has been dry. My friends are making plans to meet up next weekend but I already am far too tired to think about this.

When I got home today I saw a mouse for the 3rd time since Saturday, scurrying into the corner of my living room, where there was ostensibly nowhere for it to go. He'd normally disappear into the wall, a tiny crevice that can be as small as the diameter of a pencil, says Google. This time he hit my trap, mostly. In his panic his foot set off the spring and got caught in the metal, pinned between peanut butter and plywood. He was still alive.

I picked up the trap, my friend dangling and panicking, and felt a deep sense of shame. I wanted to open up the trap and let him go, but knew he'd just suffer more. I also didn't want to touch him. I took him out to the street where I stood over the trashcan and considered just dropping him in, and then I immediately felt worse. For some reason, I began to tear up. Like the weight of the last few weeks of disappointments and lonely boredom got him trapped here, fully alive, fully stuck. A rat in a trap. If I dropped him in the can he'd just starve and suffer and die.

I dropped him to the ground and picked up the metal trashcan and smashed him to death. As I hit him with the can the third time I let out a whimper and felt his body grind into the pavement.

It was raining, I assume his body eventually washed away into the storm drain. There's still another mouse somewhere here. I haven't set a trap for it.

>>20244303
It's many things, the fucked economy being one. What if I told you a man in the 1950s-1990s could get a four year education in some bullshit like Political Science, then say "You know what, I want to be a video game designer for Nintendo" and just go and fucking do it. Kojima is an example. There are currently people with Master degrees that can't get a decent paying job.

>>20244735
>1950s
Me again. I actually meant to say since the beginning of time. It was easier before the 1950s. You could walk up to Walt Disney, ask for a job, and as long as you knew the rudiments of creating shapes and moving them, you were hired.

>>20244735
>>20244742
Corporate farming changed so much it's unbelievable. The fact our economies survived such a drastic change is incredible to me. I'm not an economist but it's amazing something like 90% of people worked on independent farms around 1900 and somehow America shifted twice in the same century from manufacturing-oriented to service-oriented, and not only survived but became an economic behemoth.

I feel like a retard trying to understand global economics sometimes. In several ways economics is one of the most mysterious subjects, absolutely essential to the modern world but we're all still struggling to grasp how it works on a simple level.

>>20243843
I don’t know if my fellowship with the Lord is out fear or love. I think it’s a mixture of both, I don’t want to do good works just out of fear of earthy or even divine punishment — but at the same time I shouldn’t worry because Christ died on the cross for humanities sake. I believe this stems from my unwavering anxiety of other people, Man himself: because they don’t share Christs infinite mercy, you mess up once and you’re guilty by the time they set eyes on you.

Shouldn’t fear of punishment be a valid fear because the sin clogs your connection with Christ? I wouldn’t call it a servant kind of relationship i.e fear of punishment — I don’t want to have servant-Master dynamic with God, but as a loving and merciful relationship.

>>20243843
Our colonel's mettle did you feel:
Czar's servant, soldiers' father real...
Yea, 'tis a pity: slain by steel,
Now sleeps he in black earth.

And eyes aflame, he spoke his mind:
"Hey lads! is Moscow not behind?
By Moscow then we die
As have our brethren died before!"
And that we'll die we all then swore,
And th' oath of loyalty ne'er tore
Neath Borodinian sky.

Just how absolutely beyond fucking epic is this written! The whole poem for that matter. It just... burns.

>>20243843
HOW MANY BROTHERS FELL VICTIM TO THE STREETS
REST IN PEACE YOUNG NIGHA THERE'S A HEAVEN FOR A G
BE A LIE IF I TOLD YOU THAT I NEVER THOUGHT OF DEATH
MY NIGGA WE THE LAST ONES LEFT

>>20244757
Petrol, HVAC, Electric motor, integrated circuits, and deceptive GlobohomoKeynes politics. Want to make sense of it all? Maybe it would all make sense if you had the national balances of every nation participating in every card that swipes: Visa, Mastercard, American Express. You wouldn't be able to make sense of the disaster caused by Fed rate Window rate bullwhips on Save and Loans then sinking bigger "boats" like Continental and Citadel. Then the contractors building homes, the suppliers, all are in disorder and dismay that men dont show up to work, work is performed poorly, lumber skyrockets in price, tools break, and the customer cannot afford this new bill after all building is said and done. Thats how the big stuff runs on the usual. These top down big macro economic interstices put every part into context. You can't irrigate a field without canals and pipes. So why would the seeds complain about maximizing their productivity and self help? Greener pastures are a circle of Dante's Hell. Every little concrete island that pathetically "tries hard" when its choked out is like a fry cook whining at McDonalds if only he would cook a better burger the sloppy high speed feast or famine bloody trickle drive thru would be profitable and manager would have good news. But here we are in the zoo blaming ourselves by our confusion rationed scraps in squalor.

>>20244853
PS
T. Read William Greider

>>20244757
I agree. I’m guessing you’ve read the Unsettling of America? There was a fundamental piece of America that was lost when the Silent Generation and the Boomers left the family farms never to return.

>>20243843
dying fer a bit o coochie

woke up in the middle of the night.
it wasn't for this and it wasn't for that.
that's damn good to know.

>>20243843
i'm damned if i fall for that shit again

>>20244875
I have not but this looks pretty interesting. There are actually theories out there suggesting our bodies aren't designed for large scale agriculture and our gut bacteria function better when ingesting foods grown in the same environment locally. I think almost everyone dislikes the current state of food production but the levels of economic importance and scale involved make it feel impossible to counteract even though it's a very recent change.

I haven’t read OR written in so long, the closet thing has been coming up with shit of TTRPGs I play in and run. I feel like I’m wallowing in mediocrity and wasting away as I work as a teller in a bank yet earn nothing close enough to get my own apartment, I am trying to go to school but I have the irrational fear that it will be a waste of time and I will have ANOTHER useless piece of paper like my high school degree, my military service, and my resume. The world feels like it hangs off the precipice of doom every second you turn on the tv yet looking out the window all is status quo.
I wish someone would kill me because I lack the strength and conviction to do it myself

>>20244303
Reasonable as in empirical? You can attempt to research such data by comparing the rise of homelessness of a state from the start of legalization to the present, then do that for other states that have it illegal. Naturally, this sort of empirical evidence will be confounded with endless of variables (hence attempt to research). I wouldn't be surprised if people mention the rising costs of everything, inflation, and more as a reason for why there is an increase of homelessness, particularly "tent cities." However, from a cause-and-effect relationship between homelessness and the legalization of weed is inherently obvious: some jobs require a drug test. If people fail the drug test, they cannot get those jobs they want. So they may take on a job that pays less. With less payment, they would have to sacrifice their lifestyle to cope with their drug addiction. Usually, drug addiction wins out because it is a easier and faster for dopamine to reward the brain than doing anything else. So, perhaps you can also research how weed effects the brain and its reward system, and how legalizing weed increases the odds of becoming homeless.

>>20243843
drank the whole damned bottom shelf
now i'm not allowed back

>>20243843
I am working out every day and trying to eat enough to refuel my body to take on more workouts. If I don't make it into officer candidate school, I don't know what I will do with myself. A civilian life isn't an option for me, I refuse. I fucking refuse!

you now remember being "hype" for what felt like the very real living mystery of video games

New lit 'jak just dropped

>>20243966
>and all you get in return is pussy
If you meet a good person you connect with, you get much more.
Of course getting to that point with anyone is the real challenge.

time to get high i guess

>>20245084
It's kinda sad but I never experienced being hype for a game before
I loved video games as a kid but I was too poor to play new ones. By the time I was old enough to buy new video games I was depressed and couldn't enjoy them anymore.

Funnily enough the only game I ever experienced new was Portal 2. My dad bought it for me like a month after it came out and I loved it.

I didn't use 4chan for a week and my mental state improved

>>20244053
Lmao it's literally newspeak

>>20245360
Go with that.
>>20245325
Go with this >>20245360

I wish I could discern if I’m living the life I want or just the one I was forced into.

>>20245404
Is it comfy?

>>20245325
The other anon is right. Wwoym is rumination central. You're indulging not only all your own negativity but also all the negativity of all the other anons. Wallowing is bad for you. Get offline for a while

>>20244303
No.
>>20244336
No. The failing economy has been adding homeless to the streets since the Obama crash, the Cares Act gave trillions to the wealthy and lockdowns for the small business. This is taking its toll too. Still no money is spent on drug rehabilitation, much less doing anything to halt the opioid epidemic.
It’s economic and it’s practically on purpose.

>>20245414
Yes. But very lonely.

>>20245556
All of the takes on homelessness itt are shit. Everyone who has had experience with homeless know they're all anti social drug addicts.

>>20244388
a pasta is born

>>20245557
You're a big guy

>>20244618
>>20244636
Yeah I'm praying for you friend

>>20245557
I’m in a similar place. (Though I can’t say forced)
I have to rekindle a passion and live a little more dangerously for a while. Retake comfy in old age I hope.

>>20243966
You get a lot out of a good relationship but it's difficult to progress to that, at least for me, most of the time I just want my sexual impulses fulfilled. Then largely I like to be left alone. Or rather that's the easiest path for me and what I tell myself.

you can spot the predators in a second. its in their eyes and speech. some are more self aware than others but each of them knows that behind their eyes lay a hand grenade. no matter how they justify the existence of the weak, they feel in their bones a instinct to lunge.

I wonder if I will ever take control of my life again.

>>20245564
Who’ve lost their homes, livelihoods, friends. It’s been thirteen, fourteen years. Some of them have always been dopes, some just scrubby skateboarding teenagers, some schizophrenics who lost their jobs, and some of them are hooked on opioids because their doctors prescribed it. Everyone’s got a story, but they don’t belong on the streets. They don’t need to be there. This country has the money, but they rather trickle it up into a handful of millionaires pockets, they’d rather drop bombs on middle eastern families.
They don’t care about the working class, they don’t even think about the class lower than that.

>>20245587
Do you dare consult the magic eight ball?

>>20244774
i gotta rewatch this show, shit was great

>>20245083
Unless you're a retarded chud the military is going to be far far worse than just living in the normal world. It's not a good career choice. Learn a trade or something instead.

>>20245614
I got the blue illuminati with a "NAH." written in it.

You ever meet someone who is just so sad and lethargic and generally unfun to be around that it starts to make you sad too? Not even people who are mean or cold, just who have nothing at all to give when you interact with them. I'm not exactly Mr. Charisma (doesn't help having earbuds in half the time) but if I put in a little effort I can hold a decent conversation, get a chuckle out of someone, etc. But there are people in my classes who just seem so completely unable to talk to others without being strung along, devoid of personality and opinions, that it's a bit frightening.

>>20245601
nah they're usually intractably mentally ill long before being homeless, it's hardly about money at all. source: working with the mentally ill, even in (especially in) the upper crust, you have people who are the literal children of multimilti-millionaires with a condo right in the middle of santa monica/malibu/sherman oaks/wherever the fuck they want, unlimited allowance, often no expectations or only needing to stay on meds, and STILL prefer being homeless zonked out on whoever the fuck knows what on the beach getting sunburned to the point of needing medical attention. if you gave them a house and food and whatever else your bleeding heart tells you they need they'd pawn off anything not nailed to the floor, piss in the corner, let it go to shit, and refuse any counselling, therapy, or any other sort of service that might have the slightest expectation of responsibility. that or they're so fucking crazy that they really could only function in an asylum, which what do you know, all got shut down

once you learn about ressentiment you really start to see it cropping up everywhere
nowadays it's like the dominant mode of thought or something

My dad is in a vegetative state in the hospital, It's my last semester and i'm struggling wiht the finals for a bachelor degree in political science that seems more and more worthless as the years go by, I'm lonely as shit and still struggle with good old social anxiety and depression.

I'm so fucking stressed, the last 6 months of my life has been fucking dogshit mostly due to circumstance completely outside my control. Even my therapist agreed, I expected her to give me spiel about staying optimist but she just agreed.

I won't give up but goddamn, I never thought as a kid that my life would be like this at 23. Praying for good luck cause I need it lately.

I want god to be proud of me, but i am lazy and dont want to put in the effort.

I’ve been plagued with worries that i’m secretly retarded and nobody bothered to tell me. I didn’t learn to read, or tie my shoes, or distinguish left from right until well after my peers. Nobody ever indicated I had a learning disability. So maybe I was just lazy?

>>20245661
Hey stop talking about me like that, asshole. I dont think im actually that bad but i feel like it much of the time. My crush at work rejected me pretty bluntly the other day (yeah yeah dont date co workers, go fuck yourself). It probably didnt help i never could dredge up something in the wastepit i call my mind to talk to her about. Well now im angry and determined to stop being a retarded dork and get stronger by punching shit or something like that. Feelings are for faggots

>>20245673
read this?

>>20245722
We are all going to make it, anon. Don't give up

I wish my family would just drop dead
They talk too much and they act too much, it's as if they are acting for a play with no audience

>>20245673
>nah they're usually
>nah
> Everyone’s got a story

It has everything to do with money. If there was a decent healthcare system they wouldn’t be hooked on opioids and the unstable world have a home and proper care.
I’m not going to read the rest. You’re an ass or playing an ass

>>20245765
What progressives?

>>20245632
What show?

I’m druk. I don’t know what to do. I really really don’t have a clue what to do anymore. I need divine intervention at this point.

>>20245871
Put on some kicking music and dance a little till it wears off.
Drink a bunch of water and piss it out before you go to bed.

I used to think 'paperclip maximizer' was a meme pun on 'pay-per-click maximizer' and as such thought it was speaking disparagingly, not over wasteful quota matching, but clickbait.

>>20245874
Not going to dance because I’m not in the mood but inwill drink the water and piss before i sleep.

Has there ever been a film or tv show or book or painting that changed your life? What was it that did it for you?

Fucking tired of social anxiety and being a shy retarded sissy

>>20245890
Seeing Raiders of the Lost Ark when I saw it in theaters

>>20245897
Based kid

>>20245862
go try actually being around the homless you intolerable ideologue, you're naive to the point where it beggars belief. are you a 15 year old girl?

Oh reality are you changing again? Love God.

>>20245890
Oyasumi Punpun, I could relate to most of the characters and at the age of 16 it was my moment of enlightenment

Brain dump alert!
Kant's Hypothetical Imperative. "Should" not as a denotic imperative but a practical imperative. "What should I do (if I want X)".
The self doubt: "Do you really want X? Why do you want it?"
S.M.A.R.T. Goals are specific. There seems to be a motivational advantage to specific goals you can visualize. Is the Law of Attraction indirectly successful because it causes people to specify their goals which makes the Hypothetical Imperative more evident? However if you are too particular: "I want to fuck Candice Swanepoel" or "I want to beat Carlos Sainz in the Dakar Rally" couldn't you potentially be setting yourself on a path that excludes equally satisfactory goals (i.e. fucking Barbara Palvin or Taylor Hill, beating Sebastian Loeb or Nasser Al-Attiyah at Dakar)? In this vein there are two types of priorities, personal priorities ("My family, my health, my community") and practical priorities ("I can't train for that marathon now because right now I need to focus on my daughter's Hockey playing" or "we can't get a 5 seat people mover right now because we need to fix the hot water system"). Personal Priorities ideally are informed by Categorical Imperatives, and Practical Priorities are ideally informed by Personal Priorities. However fucking a supermodel isn't reflective of Kantian Categorical Imperatives, and even a well meaning or ethical person could be mislead about the means to accomplish something which means they get their Practical Priorities wrong.
>Jerry Lewis film where he constantly tries to help out an authority figure only to make things worse: his practical priorities are wrong despite him trying to act morally
How does one maximize their personal agency? Maximize your disposable income would appear to be the answer, money is fungible and can be exchanged for agency or to rent the agency of others. However is the question really about just maximizing agency?
If you shoot for two targets, you often miss both. In my personal life I've long grown suspicious of panaceas.
So: Optimize for your personal priorities.
How? I am back where I started, we must understand just why we desire the things we do, what would satisfy them (equally satisfactory goals). Okay, then how do you optimize your personal agency for those specific desires/goals?
You work backwards: what would be the penultimate step to reaching that goal. Finishing the Dakar Rally? Okay, that means you need to drive successfully the last run. That means you need good communication with your co-driver. That means you need a co-driver... and so on and so on until you find the most immediate prerequisite task.
Accuracy about that process is imperative. That means good research.
How do you research these processes well?

masturbated to tranny porn again tonight then ejaculated by switching to straight porn again. not sure what the fuck is wrong with me or how i ended up like this

>>20245967
Through contemplation, meditation or prayer one can acquire real knowledge.

im bitten by the nihilism bug and dont see a way out
nothing seems worthwhile when my lifes a momentary blip in human history which is a momentary blip in the history of the universe

>>20246003
>one can acquire real knowledge.
What is "fake knowledge" and and how does it differ from "real knowledge"? What distinguishes regular knowledge form "real knowledge"? Can you give an example of vanilla knowledge (yes, I know vanilla is a flavor: but you know what I mean when I use that term) compared to "real knowledge"? I ask because in my mind all knowledge is "real", because otherwise it's a "delusion". So you're not making sense when you say "real knowledge" that's sort of like saying "quick fast" or "intelligent smart", it sounds ridiculous.

>>20243843
Climate catastrophe. People complaining about their own lives really should kill themselves because it's only going to get worse.

>>20244053
say what you want about these woke modernity niggers but they make it extremely easy for anyone who can assert themselves as opposition to appear courageously principled and even revolutionary in comparison, when in reality you're simply standing up for the most fucking basic of traditionalist beliefs. at that point, it just feels like fighting a binary battle with a cartoonishly antagonistic, pointy moustache twiddling villain. against which, even the most regular and seemingly unremarkable of men can appear heroic, as well as feeling absolutely sure in their actions and of their cause, all that's required of them is the willingness to confront it. it's not even like you're ideologically punching down, these people are the leviathan

getting into arguments with people is incredibly stressful
with each new (You) I get an immense pang of anxiety, knowing that this could possibly be the post that absolutely destroys my position and cripples my self-esteem for having thought something which my opponent exposed as being wrong.

>>20246071
You fucking retard!!
I'm joking, but seriously, read Plutarch's How to Profit From One's Enemies. Basically the attitude I employ is that if someone owns me on here, good. I learned something. Don't take the bait and try and argue in slide threads. But you should be trying to stress test your reasoning and arguments about the world. Each 'defeat' should give you more self-esteem not less as there's another shadow of ignorance or misconception which you have now replaced with the light of knowledge.
The worst thing for me is when I write a post which I'm being a tad facetious with, but also not entirely against and no one robustly argues against it nor elaborate why they agree. They ignore it. That's the worst because I've learned nothing from the exercise and remain just as uncertain on the point as before.
Use your 'opponents' as a means of outsourcing your cognition, let them think for you!

>>20246080
based

This reply (the message I wrote which you, the reader, are currently reading) to this thread (the thread originally on 4chan's literature board that I'm replying to (by writing this reply (in my frame of reference while writing this reply, in real time, but to you, from the past), which you are currently reading)) is breaking the fourth wall (by me, the author, writing self-referentially about myself and this reply that you're currently reading), though some day I will die, you will die, and this thread and my reply may still exist on a server somewhere for long after our deaths not being read or known about and perhaps only to be analyzed by web crawlers.

>>20246089
This makes me think about the volume of 4chan shitposts I’ve typed in my decade-long presence here. 1000 book pages? 2000? Most of it cringe and whining of course, but I also had very popular gimmicks on /tv/ and /sp/ back in my prime.

>>20246012
Real vs. fabricated real here could be what community expects of you vs. what you expect of yourself if there is conflict one could say the other is more real for you.

>>20245743
ahah ok and?

>>20243966
Sounds like you're just trying to hook up. Maybe try actually dating — you know, meeting people and trying to see if you get along well enough to fall in love. Your post is like reading Twilight and wondering why literature sucks so much. Change your approach. If you don't like someone, nobody is forcing you to fuck her.

>>20246071
Being wrong is okay, anon. Separate the feeling of being wrong from the nature and actuality of being wrong, and you'll discover that these two things are fundamentally unrelated. It is possible to feel wrong while being right and, crucially, to feel right while being wrong. Separating these things means you can actually start learning and refining your thoughts and beliefs.

I was standing in the jon bon jovi rest stop in new jersey the other day, and it was the strangest aesthetic. They have these large banners with pictures of famous Americans, like Neil Armstrong during the lunar landing and so on. There was no music and the only people inside were a few sweaty mexicans and a pair of morbidly obese women

>>20246129
I didn't ask about society's expectations, I asked about what is fake knowledge, how it differs from regular knowledge and how both differ from 'real knowledge'. Now explain!

>>20246218
It depends on your beliefs. According to mine real is not material for starters.

>>20246245
The trolling around here has really gone downhill.

>>20246245
Stop avoiding a direct answer: I want to know what you meant specifically when you used it in >>20246003 post. Why didn't you just say "knowledge" why did you choose to use the qualifier "real", why was "knowledge" not sufficient? What do you see as being so different that it warranted the qualifier "real"?

I did a finger painting today. My girlfriend says it sucks, but I don't think it's too bad for 15 minutes of work. Thoughts?

Sorry it's been long time since I've used english in discussion boards. What is real is God's love for you. Accept Jesus Christ in your heart and you will be real... Sorry if my answers are not good enough for you I usually just lurk for a good reason.

>>20246262
i like it

I am mentally ill

>>20246270
Ty. Not my best, not my worst.

>>20246267
But what if you're wrong? What if the sentient creator of the universe actually hates us? What special knowledge do you claim to have?

>>20246262
Are you the anon in the thread yesterday who was telling me that art doesn't need to be clear to be good when I asked about the intent-word divide?

>>20246287
Same, brother.

>>20246307
Me? I have simply no idea what you're talking about. I just spend 10 minutes per day making these neat finger paintings.

>>20246302
Not my business to guess. The fact we are here, conscious might mean something. Book of Job.

>>20246319
Job is the very worst book. Quit LARPing.

>>20246314
Oh.
...
OOOOH! Right, I understand.
Nice finger paintings which are totally made by you in only 10 minutes.
I must have been thinking about someone else WINK WINK

>>20246324
I mean, you don't believe it? Look at the level of effort put into these and tell me they took more than 5 minutes to paint these pieces of shit.

i just spend like 3+ hours looking at a graphics card deciding whether or not to order it, debating whether or not it would be totally compatible with my old stuff, whether or not its safe to order something like that to my front door, debating whether or not i even should go out of my way to get videogames in to my life again. the card i want is out of stock in the local PC part store according to the website, if they had it in stock i probably would have felt a lot better about going and picking it up and testing it out and being able to just go and return it.

I decided not to order it after all, and i wonder if i will regret it. i know once i get drunk im gonna be wanting to play videogames since i cant focus on reading well when reading and my drinking days/nights have been boring as fuck lately

now its 4 am and my night is ruined for nothing, i literally just sat here for hours doing nothing and im not tired lmao

>>20246287
Mental illness is like perfectly natural response to present-day society. Consider the lifestyle of average western adult: soulless corporate job, Netflix, social media, casual sex, antidepressants. Cancerous copes. Women are seemingly enjoying this, but only until they hit the wall lookswise.

>>20243843
It is currently 3am. Instead of reading my waist-high stack of books, I'm shitposting on an anonymous message board about books. I genuinely fucking hate being a digital native. I just wish I could concentrate on something long enough to complete it. and by complete it, I don't mean half ass it. I mean really dig into the meat of it; get the most out of what the text is offering, instead of it just being another method of passive consumption. FUCK

>>20246328
What new videogames are worth playing? The last game I heard about that interested me was Red Dead Redemption 2, but that was 4 years ago.

>>20246335
Leave the page up, start reading a book, and every 20 minutes you can check for and answer (you)s.

i have an extreme urge to fap. i havent done it since friday. its the whole tuesday i CANT do it. i thought of lifting weights to get it off my mind. physical pain and labor will destroy it. im getting lightheaded just thinking about it. Lord forgive me

>>20246302
Sorry if my answers are bad. I've never claimed to be some ancient wiseman. Just some random, low and shallow new convert. With this I'll take my leave. Have a nice day and make choices that please the Lord for it is like sending love letters to God. Thank you you for your time and sorry again.

>>20246327
You're so humble, sure it took you 5 minutes, but I'll wager it took you 50 years to attain the ability to paint those pieces of shit.

>>20246262
this is a fascinating approach to absolute seething

>>20246353
Go try it. If you seriously can't paint things like this, then you are probably too retarded to walk.

>>20246336
just play the original DOOM senpai

>>20246351
>for it is like sending love letters to God
bless you anon

>>20246360
I gave it a go, I dunno, came out different to your style, what do you think? For five minutes I don't think it's too bad

>>20246336
im not really after new games, mostly just strat games and miscellaneous older stuff. my old card burnt out so i cant play ANYTHING basically. been playing brood war and stronghold basically lol. actually i think I just made a choice though; because of all the factors Im thinking about, whether or not its worth the investment for me, wanting to buy in store etc, im going to go to the store and check out a much cheaper gt 730 ddr5 for half the price of the 1030 i was looking at and which they do have in stock. only thing is that the bracket looks wider than the 1030 i was looking at since it has an extra port, so ill have to see if i can get a smaller bracket just in case because my pc is super slim. or jury rig the one from my old card. also ill have to see about their return policy just in case it doesn't work for my machine. I feel a lot better about this plan. I think it should suit my needs and then some considering im used to an ancient 1gb 315

>>20246382
Kek, looks like shit. People like us aren't worthy of holding a paint brush.

>>20246382
Here's a brand new original, digitally rendered. I call it, Dame en Rose.

The most interesting piece of writing I've come across so far in life is one I randomly stumbled upon a couple years ago during my year-long phase of studying Buddhism. The western Buddhist community is sprawling, and it's filled with new age garbage and hippies, but now and then you'll find things which seem to breach your current grasp of reality; clear prose written by an undeniably intelligent person describing things that should be impossible. What I came across was one of those moments.

It was a reddit post that got a few likes and no replies. In it, the guy describes sitting down to meditate one day and his entire conception of the world basically melts. I really can't do it justice, but I'll try to describe it. Basically, he comes to realize that both ideas and language are a kind of yoke or filter that we impose onto sense experience to mediate them, yet in the process distort their nature and form, so that we each experience isn't really "pure reality" but reality as imposed upon us through a number of cognitive filters which we develop during infancy and early childhood and never cast off again. Some of us have memories of what life is like without these filters, if we are lucky enough to remember back so far, but most of us don't.

Anyway, the OP of the post describes having all of these filters totally melt off like wax during his meditation, and at some point his wife comes to his side. But he doesn't recognize her, since to him everything is like this amorphous mass of sense information without order, and only after she tries to bring him to his senses does he understand who she is, where he is, what happened, and so on. I'm probably not doing the post justice - it was endlessly fascinating - but I don't have the screenshot on me right now, so perhaps I can post it later.

But the weirdest thing? He deleted the post and his account soon after. I have no idea why.

>>20244596
you already know some obviously wrong things that need to be fixed and I trust your capacity to change them and yourself.
Now go and do it.

>>20246447
>I have no idea why.
it's possible he worried that kind of thing would become a spook. God knows.

it reminded me of a thing I heard from a sufi shaykh. He said "The reason why God made it so babies can't talk is because if they could, they'd give the whole thing away!" and then he just laughed

>>20246394
I know. And it took me only 5 minutes, imagine if that was the culmination of an entire career?
>>20246438
>breaks character
GET OUT!

>>20246453
That's possible. Good catch

>>20246456
If I had a career making these, I'd be laughing all the way to the bank. Just imagine the kinds of retards who would pretend to like shit

Where did I come from?
What do you want to see there
When there is nothing?

>>20246447
>Basically, he comes to realize that both ideas and language are a kind of yoke or filter that we impose onto sense experience to mediate them, yet in the process distort their nature and form,
Sapir-Whorf hypothesis?
>so that we each experience isn't really "pure reality" but reality as imposed upon us through a number of cognitive filters which we develop during infancy and early childhood and never cast off again.
Constructivism and Acculturation?
> Some of us have memories of what life is like without these filters, if we are lucky enough to remember back so far, but most of us don't.
Lacan's The Real?
(Yes I am aware of the irony of labeling what is described in your paraphrase of a post about a temporary melting away of socially aculturated conceptions and filters on 'reality')
>But the weirdest thing? He deleted the post and his account soon after. I have no idea why.
There's something to be said about the mere act of trying to describe the experience in words is imprisoning it in the jail-cells of the English language and all the social baggage that comes with it, attacking at the core of the very sentiment he was trying to describe.
If Koans are attempts to silence the rational part of the brain, to stop it from seeking logic and order, then the exercise of describing that experience is doing the opposite.

The minor internet success of Ogden Nesmer and other middling writers gives me a huge drive to write every day. I know in my bones that I can write something which is orders of magnitude superior in any given passage than the best of what any /lit/ author has so far written. I'm going to make it. The rest of you might not, but I'm gonna make it.

>>20246447
Interesting. Reminds me of an acquaintance of mine from a few years back. He was a long time practitioner of zen buddhism, and he said one time during meditation, he became very still, and when he opened his eyes he found that his vision was inverted upside down. It took him a few minutes to adjust back. At that time I thought he was perceiving pure sense data, kinda like what you just said. Fascinating stuff.

>>20246486
>Sapir-Whorf hypothesis
It's much stronger than that. Sapir-Whorf suggests that the content of one's thought is determined by the structure of language, while what this post contends is that the content of one's thought AND perception is determined by the structure of language AND cognitive ideas (there's a common Buddhist term which translates to something like "mental structures" which is very close to what I'd call cognitive ideas). If you have any memories from childhood of life being generally "brighter", more vivid, and more intense, this could explain why.
>There's something to be said about the mere act of trying to describe the experience in words is imprisoning it in the jail-cells of the English language and all the social baggage that comes with it, attacking at the core of the very sentiment he was trying to describe.
Yeah, there's always that. But I'm wondering if there's another, even more subtle process at play where our cognitive perceptions have a kind of feedback loop where perceiving something in a certain way influences the likelihood of it being perceived in that way in the future, so that the range of possible experience actually narrows over time as the brain further carves out its niche.

>>20246516
>. If you have any memories from childhood of life being generally "brighter", more vivid, and more intense, this could explain why.
Or it's that as time goes on the 'gist' of memories becomes stronger, they effectively become caricatures.
>even more subtle process at play where our cognitive perceptions have a kind of feedback loop where perceiving something in a certain way influences the likelihood of it being perceived in that way in the future
Yeah there's a lot of cognitive science theories that pose that precise pattern.
Although there's some questions over the quality of research, you have "Cognitive Priming", you have "Frame Theory'", Hebbian Theory that "neurons that fire together wire together". It's sort of the same principle that underpins Pavlovian and Operant Conditioning

I present, Les Larmes de Fille

A decade ago now, I spent a year in a psychiatric hospital. I wasn't crazy or anything, I got misdiagnosed. I actually had epilepsy, but through medical misadventure I got locked up involuntarily and pumped full of seizure-inducing antipsychotics. It took me having a little over 300 seizures in 24 hours for the shrinks to figure out they were maybe making things worse. I've been totally face-blind and incapable of any sort of visualisation since. When I try and think, it's like trying to scoop a thin film of oil off the surface of water. I don't think it used to be this difficult, by all accounts I was intelligent and highly creative when I was younger, but the thing is, I don't remember anymore. My memory is shot.

>>20246538
I think much of interrogation comes down to causing a stress reaction and then hitting someone with a tough question while they're all hot and bothered. I think much of modern art comes down to composing such a combination of factors (the name of the painting is absolutely fucking critical in achieving this, which really is quite strange when you think about it) as to suspend the viewers trust in his own intelligence. Induce a kind of shock.

>>20246540
did they at least settle you for life for the damages?

>>20246542
Interesting take.

>>20246545
We don't have that in my country. I complained to the Health and Disability Commissioner but nothing came of it. Free healthcare has it's downfalls I guess.

>>20246549
that's one of the most horrible things I've heard in my entire life anon. if you don't mind, what do you do?

It was calm season at work, so I finally started working on learning French through youtube videos, but all of a sudden the season turned out to be not so calm and I have more work than I anticipated, leaving me feeling quite guilty, cause now I neglect studying.
It is most definitely better to learn in a course with a teacher, at least then you have it as official part of your schedule and can't slack off.

>>20246529
>Or it's that as time goes on the 'gist' of memories becomes stronger, they effectively become caricatures.
Possible. I believe there's good reason to believe young children experience emotions more intensely on average than we do, but it's a bit of a hunch rather than something I have solid evidence for.
>Yeah there's a lot of cognitive science theories that pose that precise pattern.
I didn't know that, neat. I'll take a look at some of these.
>>20246502
Anecdotes of this sort actually litter the meditative world to the extent that even normal housewives who meditate simply for the mood benefits report sudden bizarre phenomena out of nowhere. In practice it's kinda frustrating researching this stuff, since on the one hand there's plenty of evidence there IS something very real and substantial to all this, but there's also massive amounts of garbage to wade through since every pseud and hippie is attracted to the idea of enlightenment, and there's mountains of people claiming to be enlightened when the Buddhist tradition itself makes it very clear that it's an indescribably difficult and lengthy process to become enlightened, like digging through a mountain with a spoon 10 times, and there's just no chance this random person from California talking about how spiritual they are is really there.

There really is something to it, I should give it another shot one of these days.

>>20246550
I live with family because local public transport is unreliable and I can't drive, both because it's illegal for me to get behind the wheel of a car and also because it would be really stupid. I get a disability allowance from the government. I take walks, try not to spend too long standing in the middle of crosswalks if I can help it, and keep dogs. So, I'm NEET. For medical reasons.

>>20246567
am I correct in believing that every non-monk buddhist is aiming to be reborn into monkhood?

>>20246587
your story causes me pain. I hope you and your dogs get along well, and your family, and that you have good walks.

>>20246540
I feel compelled to write something about how your plight moved me. But I'm afraid anything I write will just sound insensitive. So please take this really shitty job on my part of me trying to show sympathy of how something that is not your fault was made worse by people who should have be taking care of you.

>>20243843
I live in a hell borne of a slothful start to life followed by an abrupt greed driven by fear that I would not be good enough to survive without hoarding modern resources (money, technology, the esteem of colleagues). This hell took the form pf choosing a path in life that I knew would be profitable and impressive instead of taking the time to find out what I really wanted out of life and pursuing that. now I go to a job I hate to make just enough money to get by (Im also partially driven by lust since a good amount of money goes to appeasing my girlfriends various appetites) while every day noting that I am spending a quarter of my life hatting myself and my work and just wishing that time was over, leading to dissociation that, when added to my sleep schedule, means that Im spending more than half my life doing my best to get it over with. throw in general life maintenance and bad times that eat up free time and Id say the total of my life that is not worth living is probably about %80. thats no way to live. I dont know how to change it but pretty soon Im going to have to start making some changes just to try shit. I think probably a good starting point is addressing the fear that leads me to greed and figuring out what I really want out of life. unfortunately those things are a bit ephemeral for me to set any goals to strive for other than "remedy the problem." So its gonna be tricky.

>>20246609
Kind of. It's true that lay Buddhists understand they're not going to reach enlightenment without being a monk first, but it's not like becoming a monk is an impossible goal for them in this lifetime either (In Thailand, most youths spent part of their adolescence as monks). The attitude seems to be more, "I don't feel a particular calling to become a monk in this lifetime, so for now I'm merely going to uphold my societal duties, get a career, and continue doing the Buddhist rituals on the side". Buddhism actually looks very favorably on the lay practitioner, like the business owner who practices the precepts in his day to day conduct, even if he doesn't actually meditate. For doing anything in praise of the Buddha is one of the most positive activities there is in Buddhist theology, which means making a routine of this brings enormous positive kamma.

And this is crucial because to Buddhists, high spiritual attainments correlate closely with the kammatic system. The Buddha himself is said to have taken near endless lifetimes worth of positive kamma in order to awaken in the way he did. The general outlook is you need enormous amounts of kamma built up in previous incarnations to reach any deep spiritual attainments. Which means a lifetime of simple work and simple pleasure in devotion to the Buddha is never wasted.

>>20244587
i want to watch dead poets society again

>>20243843
Trying to think what dialectical plasma cosmology would be

>>20246665
do you think you have any chances of cutting living costs and saving until you're sure enough you can take your time? it's gonna be a status-hit for sure moving into a one-roomer for instance, or whatever shift down it would take, but it could buy you space and give you a concrete goal.

>>20246670
cool, thank you very much.

>>20246683
No problem. If you're still interested in the lay Buddhist practitioner's life, check out this
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Noble_Eightfold_Path
It's like their Ten Commandments

I've been prescribed sertraline and quietiapine. I don't want to take them, I'm too wary of altering my brain and the side-effects. Any tips to convince people I don't suffer from anxiety, social anxiety or OCD and that I don't need antipsychotics?

>>20246697
Have loud sex with your gf, make sure they hear it

>>20246697
I've taken sertraline and olanzapine periodically and think I've had good effect, at least from olanzapine. just so you know. I also refused to take it at first (there's a tiny, tiny chance that olanzapine will induce parkinsons iirc, and I thought I had it under control (I did not)). I think maybe I should not have, I think it would have been better to break off the psychotic episode sooner. Anecdotally, just so you know.

>>20246008
ok so now you are at a cross roads where on the right there is the drones life of keeping ones self alive and healthy enough to reproduce with little regard to how you do it. On the left is suicide because who the fuck actually willingly goes right, that is a road you are forced down, not tread yourself. And finally there is the straight path, which in your own words is the one where you delude yourself into being a part of it anyway (what ever it is is up to you. im not saying continue to engage with literature but find something you do like engaging in). A lot of people have a problem with the third option because they are hopelessly stuck on this idea that their is a truth out there and if they could find it they would live according to it and be happy, but i dont think that is you or else you would have to admit that finding this truth would be the work to point your passion toward, and i would argue that that is correct and also that those people are already delusional. there are others that dont like the idea because of what other people would think of them (look at how ridiculous don quixote is!), but again you are talking about something that ultimately doesnt matter. if our lives are meaningless in the meat grinder than the opinions of others about those lives is less than meaningless. So you have your 3 paths. straight ahead is you forcing yourself into the fray time and time again until you are triumphant or die, instant release on the left, and the life of a robot (all be it a comfortable robot, except for that banging in his head) who is to lie down and die in the dirt like a dog. I personally will pick the fight. if nothing else i will understand the happiness of sisyphus.

I dont know how to explain but something seems so sterile and materialistic about protestantism.

>>20246680
I could definitely cut costs but I cant help but think that that kind of move is just another one made out of that greed driven fear, which will eventually lead to some other unforeseen suffering. I think maybe my subconscious point in putting my thoughts this way is to stress the need to start making decisions for better reasons which in turn will lead to gleaning more enjoyment out of life. But in order to find what reasons would be best I need to know what I want. not just what I dont.

>>20246771
*greed driven by fear

Feels like I'm at a point where I could accomplish a lot as an intellectual if I simply abandoned any hope of having a social life or being a normal person, and becoming apathetic to what others think. Feels like this might be the better option honestly with how far I've sunken into this state now.

>>20246915
Do it. There’s a lot to discover, create and achieve in disciplined solitude, while social conformity offers nothing but mediocrity and w*men.

>>20245642
I guess I am a retarded chud because I am already in, just trying to commission.

Is faith simply a relic from the past in the current day and age?

>>20246927
Faith? No. Traditional religious organizations? Absolutely. Catholic Church is a parody at this point.

>>20246923
I really might dude. Fuck it. Why not

I'm an atheist.

>>20246927
Wtf. It’s a thing unto itself. You place faith in your friend that he’ll pick you up from the airport when he says he will. It’s a gamble of sorts.

>>20243843
If I want to travel the world, I cannot do it as anything other than a tourist. I cannot experience other cultures authentically, because I would always be an outsider.

>>20246936
The trick is not to panic and backtrack when you first notice mental illness setting in, because that’s guaranteed to happen in isolation. How many great writers were outgoing normoids? Barely any.

>>20246771
what I mean is to over time reduce your workload, once you can afford to. that buying you some peace, and then you can maybe look at it from a different point of view rather than the big question that hangs ominously and pressing down on your rat-race. if you earn enough, I mean. Like save up so you can just take a year or something. It's not risk free but you should be able to plan around being able to find work if it doesn't lead anywhere, no? I wouldn't take responsibility for you doing so but I think it's hard to see clearly from where you're at. Just a suggestion, the goal being working less to give yourself time.

>>20246942
No excuse for frog posting

>>20246971
I need no excuse.

>>20244388
And she was a good friend

>>20245365
Holy shit it is

>>20246961
I get what your saying and it probably would alleviate the anxiety but I think that thinking in terms of "could I afford x (time off, security, room to breath)" is the same kind of thinking that got me here in the first place and probably doesnt lead anywhere better (it certainly doesnt lead me out, it just makes things more bearable, which =/= good necessarily). what Im thinking is I will probably do what you are suggesting in the short term but for the ling term I am going to try to make decisions out of something other than fear of not succeeding, being poor, not bing good enough. Im not sure what I will replace it with (probably love or discipline or some virtue that I actually believe in). Im not trying to make life comfortable, Im trying to make it livable.

>>20247013
I'd aim for love. Best of luck to you senpai.

>>20247022
thanks fren, thats kinda what im leaning toward. Now I just got to figure out how to start.

I can either cultivate myself to be successful in greater society (my corporate job, secondary relationships) and give up bits of individualism to be a part of the whole, or cultivate myself to be successful in underground society (freelance, building a non-cattle family) and have steadfast principles with semi-financial freedom.

That has been my struggle for the last year. The two identities are fundamentally opposed to one another. Working on one sets me back in the other. Praying they merge.

>>20246915
But you won't. Without even minimal social pressure to keep you in check, you'll become a weird recluse with brain drain and internet addiction, and most probably social media (4chan), porn, and alcohol addictions. Your mind will rot and within a year you'll wonder what it was you even set out to do. ask me how I know this

>>20247145
>ask me how I know this
Projection?

my brain has been balkanized

>>20246934
When did Catholic Church become a parody? I keep hearing about Vatican II being the last nail into its coffin.

>>20247255
Schismatics butthurt about infallible Popes leadership. Nothing new really.

>>20247265
Only Pius X was a good pope. The rest too modern.

First salmonella in Kinder products manufactured in Belgium, now E. coli in frozen pizza from French Nestle. Competition, incompetence, or...?

>>20245601
Haha lol lmao no my man most of them do in fact belong on the streets. a whole lot of them even prefer it.

>>20247166
Yes, that was the implication

>>20247323
You’re wrong, as usual. Heartless as you are ignorant.
Or is it that you wanna go and die on the streets and assume they’re all like this?

...are we brothers, anons?

>>20247359
Hurrr durrr muh bleeding heart. Look anon, I have personal experience with the homeless. My brother and mom and chronically homeless. I've known many other losers and scumbags through them. Once you get some real world experience muh bleeding heart stops being relevant.

>>20247356
glad I asked.

>>20247399
Nah, we're sisters.

>>20247403
not him but it sounds like you may have some anecdotes that support your views. care to share? I think they would be interesting and may also help dispel this other anons optimistic fantasies about the homeless.

>>20247399
Im ur cousin you sexually experimented with when you were 11

I've been binge watching these "what song are you listening to" videos
So far people from New York have the best taste in music while Singaporeans are the worst, the absolute bottom

>>20247438
It pertains more to drug addicts than homeless, but given that every chronically homeless individual is also a drug addict, it is applicable to them to. Drug addicts are parasites. All of them. They're also all experts in manipulation. They will come to you, begging and pleading and promising. You will be like anon, with a bleeding heart thinking you can save them. You give them what they ask for. And thats when they know they have their hooks on you. Naturally all their promises about quitting, going to rehab, getting a job are all lies. And once those lies become apparent their behavior becomes more coercive. They'll start guilting and shaming you, treating you like satan himself. They know all the right things to make you feel like a piece of shit. And this will go on until they've bled you dry. They will leave you a husk. You'll have no capacity to feel anymore. No more empathy. Hardened like a stone. And the drug addict will take every single fucking penny from you until theres nothing left. And once you have absolutely nothing left to give they will move on as if you never existed. They wont have changed one bit. They just take everything you have and spend it all on the next dose.
They are ALL like that. No exceptions.

>>20247403
>I know this one guy, see…?
How many times I gotta write “everyone has a different story”? I got real life experiences. I don’t want them on the streets to make them even meaner and desperate. I don’t want the squalor, the smell or garbage, crack shit and corpses. They need a roof and some medical attention. This leaves maybe a hundred of your complete lost causes, who would go in a loony bin.
FACT: lack of money put them there. 99.9% of them. Yes, even the crazies. Do I have to explain that again? We’ve got more than enough money to fix this problem. Your stupid excuses don’t need repeating.

I've sinned... about to drink again.

>>20247515
I wrote in my post that I know many chronically homeless people. They're all the same. Go visit an al-anon meeting and listen to what they say. Homlessness and its causes are well documented. Nobody on skid row is there because they missed a job opportunity for smoking pot.
>everyone has their own story
The other anon is right. Thats the kind of thing a 15 year old girl says. You obviously have absolutely zero experience with this subject. Stop talking about it.

>>20247491
sounds like you have a lot of resentment for drug addicts and are projecting that onto homeless people anon. As someone who was homeless for a year and some change I can tell you that most of the people that I knew were either escaping a bad situation or so clinically insane that they wouldnt dare touch drugs because they were the devil trying to put demons in their tubes or some shit. I myself left an abusive household and lived in an abandoned barn when I couldnt find a couch to sleep on. you would be surprised how hard it is to get a job when you cant clean up well as well (either because you dont have access to showers, dont believe in them or your natural looks are already fucked up). I was lucky, I had a friend willing to pay for a gym membership at a place with showers and I eventually met a girl I shacked up with until I found a job. Im not saying what you are saying about drug addicts is wrong, I definitely have seen what you are talking about. But my experience has made me distrust your projection of the behaviors of drug addicts onto all homeless people.

>>20247528
You have ONE experience with homeless drunks. Go out and talk to the rest of them. Those living out of their cars and still working even.

>>20247528
>is asked to share anecdote about homeless people to prove his point
>goes on a rant about how bad drug addicts are and hopes that translates to all homeless people
>proceeds to tell other anons that have no experience with homeless people and thus dont know what they are talking about
low quality bait.

>>20247545
Maybe I should be more explicit, but I've been using the term "chronically homeless" for a reason. People who are homeless due to economic reasons almost always recover within a year and do not become homeless again. The chronically homeless are people with psychological problems and drug addictions. The mental illness is usually caused by the drug addiction. For these people the lifestyle is a choice. I've personally known a lot of them. I've also known a lot of people who were normal and then became chronically homeless after taking up drugs. I've dealt with them in my personal life too much to have any sympathy.
Now I live in Los Angeles. I actually live in a very nice suburb, and yet it's still crawling with homeless. They're clinically anti social and are a danger to be around. I known the city of LA has been putting the homeless into hotels. The hotels are just turning into filthy drug dens. It isn't a money issue. You can give the chronically homeless all the money in the world, but it wouldnt change a single thing. The only real solution is to fire up the drug war with extreme prejudice and forcibly commit all the chronically homeless into long term care facilities and labor camps.

>>20247550
>one experience
>drunk
No, I have the past decade of my life dealing with homeless tweakers. Shove it up your ass

I gave up on family and friends because i hate myself.

>>20247614
but they didnt leave you, right?

>>20247567
Yeah most homeless people are drug addicts. Shocking, right?

>>20247614
I think I hate myself because family and friends gave up on me desu

>>20247617
They haven’t yet. But I don’t know how long this can go on until they eventually become “strangers”.

>>20243843
Every day I think about breaking up with my gf, who is the best I've ever had. She's my polar opposite: fat, feminist, leftist, the things I usually hate in life. But she's also uncommonly kind, motivated, understanding, patient and loyal. Our differences balance each other out, and for the first time in my life I feel like a normal human being.

I don't know if I think about breaking up with her because I've been conditioned to pursue what Hollywood has sold me all my life, or because I have doubts about the future of the relationship; that we might go even further and the inevitable break up hurt me more than if I were to pull the plug right now. Even more worrying, would the breakup destroy her? She has a history of attempted suicide before we met, so I'm both terrified of staying and of going.

>>20247577
I see ok.
>I am using chronically homeless as a designator for the type of homeless that money dosnt help and explaining why it doesnt help them
got it. fair play I guess. as someone who generally also doesnt have much sympathy for the types of people you refer to I still think that there should be more done if only to give the the other type of homeless a better chance to get out of that environment more quickly (because if we feel like that about chronic homeless imagine the hell those that have to be around them and go through the hardship of being homeless feel). But I do agree that whatever public installation is set up to help the homeless (say public bathhouse or something) are going to be shitted up by those chronic homeless (fucking and doing drugs in public library restrooms like animals).

>>20247628
If you say so... It hasnt been my experience but fuck I could be wrong.

I haven't read anything but 4chan posts in like 10 months.

>>20245890
Spiderman 2
I got a GF and good grades because Danny Elfman is an excellent composer and dough boy Maguire is an excellent relatable avatar.

Aggressive men are an endangered species artificially seperated/estranged, placed in air conditioned kennels and shuttles around the molasses blooded sloths wimps and sissies and fat women who cannot fathom a spark in the blood or load on the bones. Even the priests, saints, monks, and lady soldiers gaze with confusion at the noble savage. Harrison Bergeron has to build his own restraints and lecture and length as to the efficacy of his crippling to the mad mob. So it goes.

Carlyle is my favorite writer. I have not read him.

I've been thinking about nonviolent violence. Bitch kwan do if you will. THE famous ninth-century Chinese Buddhist monk Linji Yixuan told his disciples, “If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill him.” The statement deliberately confounds people and is meant to jolt them from complacent ways of thinking. However, beyond this purpose there is another. One should seek the inner Buddha nature that resides within, not an external Buddha for liberation.

Angutara Nikaya Book of Fours: With Kesi the Horse Trainer
"If a tamable person doesn't submit either to a mild training or to a harsh training or to a mild & harsh training, then I kill him, Kesi."

"But it's not proper for our Blessed One to take life! And yet the Blessed One just said, 'I kill him, Kesi.'"

"It is true,Kesi, that it's not proper for a Tathagata to take life. But if a tamable person doesn't submit either to a mild training or to a harsh training or to a mild & harsh training, then the Tathagata doesn't regard him as being worth speaking to or admonishing. His knowledgeable fellows in the holy life don't regard him as being worth speaking to or admonishing. This is what it means to be totally destroyed in the Doctrine & Discipline, when the Tathagata doesn't regard one as being worth speaking to or admonishing, and one's knowledgeable fellows in the holy life don't regard one as being worth speaking to or admonishing."

>>20247638
My fat gf of 6 years was a hardcore feminist fat positive antiwhite run of the mill school drone before I fucked her into ship shape beautiful feminine fit racially conscious and equanimous reactionary (I dont think femoids can evolve past reactionary). She also had a history of past attempted suicide. We bonded over Batman. I miss her. We separated because she made more money than me and I was politically unemployed despite being excellently skilled. Ride it out man. The time will come and the action will unfold on its own accord inexorably.

I've stumbled upon some really strange website that I think you guys will enjoy.
Its some site filled with esoteric Christian mysticism (?).Too be honest that's not even an accurate description of this site. I honestly don't know what the fuck this is but its so extensive and I've barely scratched the surface. Its basically just barebones HTML site with a single scrollable page filled with links to a bunch of strange religious shit.
Please, someone help me get to the bottom of what this is. I really think some of you will find this intriguing.

Scroll at your own risk and make sure you explore the links in the index.
>https://www.hiddenmeanings.com/

I wish a war would break out. I wonder how many splinter faction free whimsical bucket list quests we would see. Would men rape old women en masse? Would old women relish it? We love chaos after all. Xbox live shouts as actionable threats. Imagine it. Noice. Kino.

>>20247889
Christ cucks rekt again
Testimony of whores fags and Jews wow

>>20247942
I wish a nigga would

How much data usage in the past 30 days have you used on your computer? For me it says 320GB.

>>20247942
Most people aren't about that life. The ones that are gather weakling's through violence and fear and start running shit because they know that there is strength bin numbers.

>>20247949
Every topic link leads to an article of equal length to the homepage. The site is fucking huge and the author, Bill, seems to make cosmic connections to everything.

I cut off all contact with my brother and mother. They simply don't respect or truly love me no matter how I spin it. Im quite literally growing physically sick with my heart issues induced by constant lying and manipulation coming from my mother and my brothers meekness and silent acceptance of her terror. I feel like im giving away my soul, but I cant help my brother no matter how much I try. God forgive me, because Im giving up on being the very saviour I wished for in my youth in my brothers life, and our familial cycle of misery will continue.

>>20243843
in the last 12 hours i have
>propositioned a couple at a bar for a threeway (rejected)
>knocked on a random door to ask if i can nap on their couch (also rejected)
>hurt my head so bad all the hair on the back turned red (don't know how i did this)
>peed my pants in a cop car (did not realize this until some time afterwords)

med school really put a damper on reading :<

>>20247399
I'm ur ex (male)

>>20248073
are you the anon who drank the entire bottom shelf at the bar?

>>20248073
You fell on your ass and split your skull on the concrete. You bled all over your hair. Go to a hospital and get it cleaned and sutured.

>>20248100
yes
>>20248109
the cops told me they had an emt look me over and confirmed i was ok. i don't remember that happening but i don't think they were lying to me

>>20248119
>yes
based. absolutely based. why did you need to ask someone to nap on their couch though?

>>20248151
i was cold and i couldn't find my car
not sure why i walked so far away from the bar in the first place

>>20247942
Order is an illusion

>>20243843
I want to die and I don't know why

would you eat a hot girl's asshole even if there's poop residue

about to start st. augustine's confessions

>>20248062
The LORD hated Esau because he was based and redpilled

>>20243966
I was dating but focused on anything but sex, and eventually got a gf out of it with which i can connect much deeper. Its definitely worth it if you do it right.

>>20244303
Partly yeah, it probably synergizes really well with inequality problems. But as a main cause no, look at the netherlands as counter example.

I can breathe, indeed, and this is likely because of a few factors of which I will bring attention to two or more in the following few words: one) there's nothing obstructing my breath at the moment; and two) there's breathable air surrounding me at the moment; and three) my body is breathing the breathable air at the moment; and four) etc., etc. and so on and so forth.

There's a person that pops up in my Snapchat feed who astounds me. It's some model in Dubai from an oil rich family who does makeup for celebrities. Her family got her jobs right when she turned 17. All she does is post selfies, promote cosmetic products, flaunts her plastic surgery, posts her feet on a free OnlyFans page, talks about astrology all the time, shares quotes from Rupi Kaur books and drinks wine while watching Netflix. She is probably the least interesting person I have ever seen in my life. The apex NPC who has never had an original thought or struggled for anything. It's amazing that these people exist and prosper.

>>20248240
ye

i was in a lab class with a chad and his hot gf, she spilled a beaker and said "oh fuck me", and I muttered "with pleasure" under my breath a little too loudly and chad gave me a look

Imagine if someone pissed, shat and vomited into a blender, then blended it up and let it sit out in the open until flies landed on it and laid their eggs. Then they closed the lid and blended the flies and eggs into the mixture and drank it. That would be pretty gross, wouldn't it?

>>20248466
Lmao, nice

This is a type of day where I am unsure if I want totalitarian breeding farms or complete extinction of any life

>>20248482
sometimes i wonder if global warming would be for the best

True

Should I read Plato or the Bible first? I'm not religious but I figure I ought to read the Bible due to its influence.

>>20246349
You'll feel terrible if you give in. I lasted just over two weeks (personal record) when this tinder girl sent me nudes out of nowhere. When I blew my beans, I felt a terrible pain in my ass, balls and gooch simultaneously. It was fucking weird, I think I blew out my root chakra desu. Next five days were spent in an abnormally deep bout of depression and lethargy, genuinely didn't have the energy to leave my bed

>>20243843
sex

I think I autismed myself into the empty space where gay is supposed to be but I'm not gay so now I'm just nothing.

>>20248647
Well they're totally unrelated, it's up to you basically. If you're doing it for literature reasons rather than philosophy reasons the Bible will be infinitely more useful for references

>>20247359
The people who could fix it need them to be perpetually unhoused so they can float them $600 a month from the taxpayer pocket

>>20246540
Sounds like brain damage desu. Maybe it's worth trying some noots with neuro-regenerative properties like racetams or semax, but I'd just go ahead and start microdosing shrooms if I were you.

>>20248466
Based sigma

>>20245863
Moral Orel. Claymation about a boy who grows up in a fundamentalist Christian community, becomes extremely dark in the final season.

I think I went into an autistic rant today and revealed my real shitty personality

>>20246008
Evola will straighten you out

>>20246942
How come? Did you try delving into spirituality?

>>20248327
What do you mean by that? I am hairy, but I am not red haired

>>20243843
I recently remembered that I used to keep a virtual journal and decided to read over my previous entries. In a section from over a year ago, I write about how I want to finally actually finish what I'm writing. The work I was referring to is still today unfinished, and it made me feel very unaccomplished. However, it is also a kick in the ass to actually write more.

>>20248695
government money laundering

>>20248748
do you mean your true power level?

Results are back and I'm STD free. I got the full panel done. I'm glad I don't have HIV. Part of me was worried because ex-gf used to fuck a heroin user but I'm just a hypochondriac.

Marxian-Thomist Fascism

>>20243843
I love dating. You spend time creating memories with with a kind selfless woman and all you get in return is love - dedicated to Christ and saving herself for marriage. Do any men actually not enjoy this or are they just soul-dead coomers?

>>20249369
I have never experienced dating, so whether I'd enjoy such an activity is unknown because my rational understanding may miss certain variables that could flip the affect to either positive or negative that dating has on me which only experience could provide the apt report in order to understand to an extent that giving an answer is not questionable.

>>20246952
Right. Love your own culture anon.

>>20246952
there is literally nothing wrong with that. you are who you are, your people are who they are. learning about other cultures is great and it doesn't matter if \you ltierally assimilate into them. love and appreciate who you are and love and appreciate your roots; your race, your culture, history etc. any hippy liberal/leftist faggot who tells you to do anything else is just trying to commodify your identity and ego as either a means of profit or sensual indulgence

>>20243843
I'm depressed and lonely. I feel like my life is going no where and I'll die poor and alone.

society seems to be falling apart and it feels like we're in the end times.

>>20243966
You get Pussy? I'm lucky if I can get a response.

>>20249493
It's inevitable. Civilizations have expiration dates. Whatever comes next will carry the torch we dropped. Just relax and try to be better than the wretched fools around you.

I wonder what's the best way to study books? I "just read" when I'm in my focus states when I'm studying but what am I really doing? I want to be effective when I have time to study.
is it normal to argue with yourself out loud when working out problems?

>>20243843
I'm looking for shit on the city planner Robert Moses and so much shit is out of print. why is this?

>>20245614
god I remember having one as a kid

>>20249699
Outlook not good

>>20244618
according this thing, the TIffany and redhead thing checks out. I've been around long enough to know.

It’s bleak: to look back and think about what went so wrong. There is no single moment responsible for my fate; just a succession of small banalities that culminated on an anticlimactic, ever-present misery.
Hating oneself - hating for a very long time, even before the decade long succession of mistakes and failures started - wears a person away bit by bit. The only difference between then and now is that hate started sharing more space with despair and disappointment.
There’s also gratitude: for all the good fortune that has been given and all the precious and delicate moments upon which we feel Alive. They cover the world with meaning, no matter how insignificant such meaning may look to an outsider’s perspective.

>>20248240
Nah, eating hot girl pussy is bad enough when you're drunk and you think
>I know I can taste pee residue, does she now think I'm a retard because I'm straying too far away from her vagina?
>>20248647
Why do you wanna read either?
>>20248944
Make your previous self proud anon, atone for your sins against yourself!
>>20249329
Just don't rawdog any bitches
>>20249493
>society seems to be falling apart and it feels like we're in the end times.
You (and really anyone) probably wouldn't say that if you were happy and surrounded by friends and had direction and a sense you'll die comfortable

bump, lets get to the new thread already

bump again

bump 3

>>20249861
Bump four?

New thread time yet?
>>20249882
>>20249882
>>20249882

I am not interested in questions of "reality" and "truth" and "what is knowledge". I now realize that while it is self-evident that if you want to accomplish certain objectives, that you need to operate within the confines of reality, you need to understand what is 'true'. Defining these things doesn't help you actually acquire the practical knowledge you need to accomplish those tasks.
What really matters is understanding what the intent is behind any given objective, goal. Now it would be easy to get distracted by questions of "what is intent? Is unconscious desire intent?" which are all proxies of basically:
>Why do you want this outcome?
Another potential distraction is some people will then make you doubt if that is truly what you want, or if it is 'healthy' to want those things. Obviously there is a connection to the objectives to therapy here. But this is irrelevant to this discourse since even if you find out what you really want and come out of therapy healthy - you still need to take pragmatic actions to reach your objective. And that comes from understanding just why you want this outcome, and how/why that outcome would satisfy it.
i.e. I want to learn the bass; why? Because I want to play music like Jaco Pastorius. Obviously learning the guitar wouldn't satisfy this outcome, nor would the saxophone even though they are similar, but they don't satisfy the necessary condition of emulating Jaco Pastorius. Why emulating Jaco Pastorius is a intent at all is not necessary to determine for this discourse. Only: what is the most effective means of not just learning the bass but learning the bass in the style of Jaco Pastorius which may be different to "learning to play in the style of Flea, John Paul Jones... etc. etc."
The specificity of the intent helps narrow down the practical means to realizing the outcome.
However there is also the reverse;
i.e. I want to go to this nightclub; why? because I'm bored.
Obviously there are many solutions to being bored and attending that nighclub may for any number of reasons may not be satisfactory. We then need to clarify what would be the antidote to 'bored'.
This is a much more effective means of reaching outcomes than trying to define what truth, reality, and knowledge are. As the aspects of all those which are relevant and necessary will be revealed in this process of reverse engineering the intents behind outcomes.

>>20249896
Having arrived at the summit of just 'why you want this outcome' the real struggle begins:
>How do you manifest this outcome?
While Plato felt it necessary in the Republic to discuss a whole city to make more visible his investigation into Justice, here I will attempt the opposite. And look at a small example of intent to outcome and how.
>I want to put on a sweater; why? Because I am cold.
In other words the intended outcome is: be warm. It is not necessary to enumerate all the possible ways other than wearing a sweater to become warm. We need not fear analysis paralysis. We need not define what is "true" or "real". We just need to answer some simple questions: do we 'have' a sweater? (What do we mean by have? I won't even bother with a discourse on ownership. If it's my girlfriend's sweater but it fits me and it's in my immediate proximity then we do indeed 'have' a sweater). Is it clean? Is it "warm enough"? Where is it (which intutively answers - how to get it)?
Wittgenstein would probably explain that if the sweater is in a drawer, then we would have to open the drawer, search through the contents of the drawer to retrieve the sweater. At which point we would feel the material to determine if it is indeed warm enough.
>What if it's not warm enough? We have then failed to achieve our outcome.
Don't worry there is a longsleeve t-shirt which is in there as well which I can put on (obviously underneath the sweater).
There, we have solved the warmth problem! Now while this process is easy. It takes more time to describe this process than to actually do it - this is not so of more ambitious goals. Like becoming a best-selling non-fiction author. Or becoming a fine-art photographer of international renown. or building an orphanage in a third world country. or solving the Riemamn Hypothesis.
But like... while people haven't solved the latter, some people have solved Millenial Prizes. People have built orphanages in third world countries. There are thousands of fine art photographers of international renown and best selling non-fiction authors.
But each of these endeavors requires a different starting point. But how do you start if describing how to 'get warm' with a fucking sweater is so difficult, wouldn't it be exponentially more difficult to enumerate the things necessary to accomplish these outcomes?

>>20249941
How did we solve the warmth problem? We simply defined what quality we intended to possess: be warm. And then searched a object in our immediate proximity that facilitated that in conjunction with another object near it. Our initial envisioned solution: put on a sweater had to be augmented by wearing a long-sleeve t-shirt.
More ambitious outcomes will follow a similar pattern. Not only will there be multiple qualities that need to be satisfied; there will be many tools and objects. But what if you don't have the ambitious equivalent of a sweater or a long-sleeve t-shirt - then what do you do?
if you want to be a fine art photographer of international renown - you need a camera at least. Cameras are expensive. You need money. You need to save money. If you are living paychque to paycheque then you need to find more income that will exceed your outgoing expenses.
DAMN YOU REALITY!

>>20243870
>Boobs
Good idea

>>20249329
I am also a hypochondriac and know the feeling of intense relief

sometimes I wonder if there is some weird part of my brain that likes being freaked out all the time for reason of anticipating a greater feeling of relief when I inevitably don't have "the disease"

I am oppressed. I wish only that I were oppressed by more honest people. I wish I had the kind of oppression you read about in novels, where a jack-boot regime makes demands of you backed up by force.

I just wish for this so that everyone could suffer together. Currently everyone suffers, but only those who aren't oversocialized (i.e., those who are autistic) can see it. Every measure against my wellbeing is gilded in brain deactivating slogans about love and harmony. I am more offended by these cliches than I even am by the oppression. I would trade this current level of transgression against me for a far greater one if only the transgressor would use more frank language. I don't want my money to be "reallocated to those in need," I would rather: "your money is mine because I'm the king and you're not, fuck you."

I don't think this will ever happen unfortunately. It's just so demeaning.

>>20250117
Degeneracy