/lit/ - Literature

Like a cat in the night
Prowling 'round the neighborhood
A pervy anon
took this thread's maidenhood

I'm reading Fitzgerald's letters. They're so sad. He's constantly in debt to his publisher.

Thank you anon, I need this! Cheers!

/wg/ = writing general? Just verifying. Thanks in advance.

>>19872417
Wuggie

Thoughts?

If writing is for me a tediously slow task in which I struggle to put any idea on the paper does that mean that this isn't me for me, or should I press on? I don't have that inherent need to write like so many authors do, just enough interest to have actually started, but now I'm having doubts.

>>19872527
When you're starting out, there's so much that you don't know that you don't know. So it's impossible for you to write something when you don't really know exactly what it is you're supposed to be writing, which is where reading and allowing youtself to imitate really helps. The only parallel I can think of is if I were to become a painter. I love Monet but I have no idea how to paint like him except by imitation. What you're feeling is a simple function of not having the "chair time", so to speak. When you actually get to the point where you have your own ideas and you have some notion of how to execute them, the need to write explodes astronomically.

yesterday i have wroten.
today i will writen.
tomorrow i will writed.
it is only write.

How big is your email list and follower count you have that you’re going to market to for your preorder bros?

My goal is to get my first book into the top 25,000 BSR.
That’s how I’ll know if it’s viable to keep publishing.

Had a really great feeling id like to share. Only two people in my life know I'm writing a book. I dont want anyone to know until its literally printed, as then I can tell people "I have written a book here it is. I am 100% satisfied and consider this my best work." I'm finalizing my first draft now, and wanted to share a section with one of those two people. 1,000 words maybe. So I asked her to read it and she was very excited. I stipulated its an unedited rough draft in the middle of a story, just give it a read, just this section. So I went to take a shit, come back ten minutes later, and she's still reading. I figured fuck it ill let her be. Checked every ten minutes and she was still reading. She did this for an hour, and she was even in the middle of something when I asked her to read it. And she was in her 'reading a book I like' position the whole time. She snapped out of it because she had to take a piss and couldn't hold it any longer. She told me she kept thinking she should stop but she just couldn't. Anyway thanks for reading my blog. I really hope somebody else gets to feel this way today.

>want the world to feel open and expansive
>want the plot to feel tight and self-contained
Is it possible?

Anything I introduce to expand the feel of the world and make it interesting also feels like it should also tie into the plot somehow in order to keep it focused. I don't think the reader should be wondering which universe-original concept will have bearing on the plot and what is just flavor and worldbuilding.

Remove access to a main characters powers or have a prison/captured arc
Is there anything that says 'I suck at plausible character development' more than this?

>>19873730
Neither of those two have anything to do with character development though

>>19873224
>craven and predatory meerkater detected

>>19873741
>unsuccessful unheard of writer detected
what are you even writing again?

>>19873738
>Not seeing how restricting a characters freedom and agency is a hackneyed, lazy man's technique to enable excessive internal monologue based drivel about their captors, wants, hopes and memes.
ISHYGDDT

>>19873761
You can do both as plot points without even touching on internal monologue or character development

>>19873768
>I can be retarded without doing anything.
this is why I come to 4chan.

Anyone else listen to the self publishing show? Got a favorite episode?

>>19873719
Surely you could have the main characters comment on or interact with the things that are important to the plot, and everything else could be mentioned in passing or just as everyday lingo?

You marketing pseuds have made me hate my previous career choices. Stop with this Twitter follower/podcast shit. You clearly have no idea what you’re doing. Focus on your writing.

>>19873987
Already a better writer than you buddy.
Focus on your marketing.

>>19873730
Yes, having a story where the main character has powers

Why do faggots lash out at those who try to help them? Is this why they’re faggots?

>>19873968
I'm doing it as a graphic novel kind of thing and largely want to illustrate the cool worldbuilding stuff, but I feel like it would too much emphasis on it that might give people the wrong ideas. I mean if anyone even bothers reading, but I've seen too many fan theories and discussions get sidetracked by obviously flavor stuff that will never be relevant again but exists just to make the world feel alive.

I did it. I finished the first draft!!!!!

Now to find a bunch of bored losers stuck at home with nothing better to do to beta read 50k words. Anyone know someone?

I want to write a non-fiction. I've written columns for newspapers and blogs before.

How do i go about doing it?
Do i pitch a concept first?
Should I write a chapter and then give it to publishers, or should the book be completed?
Any and all advice would be appreciated.

>>19872517
You have the same problem I have. You think your readers are stupid and need to be told point by point what's going on

>>19874177
There’s websites for this.

>>19874202
Non fiction is a stupidly long essay.

>>19874208
I prefer the term "Accessible narration". But I get what you mean. I was worried that it wouldn't be enough to mention the backyard door was glass to let the reader get what happened, so I did the setup to the crash -plus- the highlited word

One of the major aspects of my story is power escalation.
It starts out rather simple. Maybe part of a city or a whole town is destroyed in a fight.
THEN we get up to shit like
>A guy punching another guy into the ground so hard it creates a crater 10 times as wide as the crater created by the Trinity test
>A character forcing a city-sized spaceship into orbit so fast it burns to a crisp
>A headbutt clash creating equal force to a magnitude 12 earthquake
>A character laser-sniping a nuclear warhead that's in orbit with pinpoint accuracy
I don't know how rapidly I should build up to stuff like this

>>19874445
Depends. Just from that brief summary I dont take your story seriously, so take it at whatever pace serves you best. Just spitballing, you can treat those feats like milestones during a hike

how do i combine persona, metal gear, SMT and evangelion into a story?

>>19874498
rub them together

>>19874498
You write a light novel on your phone during the train to your shitty finance job where you're not even sure what it is you do, then you send it to a family friend with publishing connections who gets you a single season anime and a manga that dries up in two years.

>>19874484
It's more about the sheer horrific destruction these characters can carry out

>>19874529
Still, you can use those milestones to match the character's powers getting out of hand and the consequences.
Read Emergence. Then make it into a written book and swap heroine for Super heroines

>>19874498
Persona is smt but that aside:
A select group of people are born with a natural psychic connection to the etherial plane, allowing them to have some control over the sentient spirits that live there, usually in the form of contracts. A government(?) Organization trains some of these people as a part of a psychic soldier program and deploys them to combat terror threats that frequently involve psykers and the etherial plane.
The evangelion thing is just making the characters sympathetic headcases (the spirits they work with reflect their inner turmoil) whose personal destinies tie into the apocalyptic fate of the world. Also, bridge bunnies.
call it 'Black Ops; Black Magic'

>>19874517
>who gets you a single season anime and a manga that dries up in two years.
I like how you're saying this like it ism't being incredibly successful

>>19874557
It's not superheroes, it's giant monsters.

>>19874576
Just let me make my joke damnit!

What happens when Michael, Raphael, Uriel, and Gabriel meets Lucifer, Beezelbub, Mephistopheles, and Satan?

Do they engage in an epic battle of universal proportions or do they sit at a table discussing what's best for humanity?

>>19874559
okay nice. i should have added how do i add serial experiments lain and digital devil saga to the mix?

>>19874606
In the end all that struggle was just a computer program

>>19874559
>A select group of people are born with a natural psychic connection to the etherial plane, allowing them to have some control over the sentient spirits that live there, usually in the form of contracts. A government(?) Organization trains some of these people as a part of a psychic soldier program and deploys them to combat terror threats that frequently involve psykers and the etherial plane.
This is just evangelion

>>19872517
Bad news: I think your writing has a number of issues. Good news: if you read this passage outloud, because that's how it'll sound in someone's head, you'll realize exactly what those issues are and fix them.

>>19874600
They call it "The aristocrats"

>>19874676
Clever, thanks.

>>19874570
I'd rather make an anime that lasts for more than a season, yes.

>>19874606
Main character has schizotypical disorder and thinks he might be a spirit shoved into human flesh. The narrative filters through his hallucinatory perspective.
And I guess the spirits have their own political situation distinct from the mortal world's that imitates the parts of DDS that you like the most and that occassionally effects the material world, explaining some of the spirits' odd-to-humans behavior

>>19874748
How common do you think it is for someone from this board, or this site, to get a television show?

been absent for a couple days. dealing with people stuff. did anything funhappen while i was gone

>>19874772
Gilf erotica and borges influenced oppai loli milking literature

>>19874772
We talked about eyes and weights with Kaijuanon.
The legitimacy of futa x male incest as a fetish was discussed
Anons that haven't finished the draft for chapter one discussed marketing strats

>>19874779
>>19874790
splendid

>>19874798
Have (you) developed anything as of late?

>>19874772
Yes, you missed all the fun we had...

>>19874832
Yeah, I hit the 20k word mark of my first draft a couple days ago. It's subject to change but I'm fairly happy with it. There's a swordfight on the top of an airship's back.

>>19874798
Yep
we're really covering all our bases

>an animator that wants to draw a human performing an action will first film himself doing it in order to have an accurate reference of how to draw the action

Do you use reference while writing or do you freehand everything from imagination?

I like to watch culture and nature documentaries in order to get a grasp on things to outline and consider while worldbuilding because I'm not well traveled.

After a few days on which I've been able to reach 300 words at most, today I completed a little over 1700. I know it's not that much, but I'm very happy about it.
I still think my scenes tend to go on for too damn long, but I guess that's an editing problem rather than a writing problem.

>>19875108
Depends on what I'm working on. I've never been a king so I reference royal duties when writing them. Sometimes however the details don't give me the appropriate feel for my story, so I freehand and embellish the rest to suit my tastes. And if I get questioned on any legitimacy in the story, I hit them with "poetic license".
>>19875231
Always better to have more words than less.
Captcha GAY0V

Nine chapters in and my draft no longer makes sense. I have figured out several plot holes, improved on several plot points, and made several editorial notes that I won't be able to implement until I begin my first edit. The draft's plot is going nowhere right now.

Does it still make sense to 'just write?'

Got a 5 star review on my webnovel today. Making it one step at a time

>>19875519
can we see

>>19875382
Implement your edits now and, if you have an outline, fix it and outline from that point on. There's no sense in continuing a draft that is going in a pointless direction

>>19875559
I'm in the author pastebin

https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/49395/the-undying-emperor

>>19875519
>>19875580
good job anon! My newest story hasn't gotten any ratings yet which is strange to me.

>>19875664
Thanks m8

Ratings and comments are apparently super rare??

What a toxic site

>crap out 650 words of absolute hot dukey
>gets me straight into a perfect lead-in for the exciting part
I'll edit you later, fucko. I've got some people to kill

>>19873719
Sounds like you need, pardon me for what I'm about to say, a diverse cast.
People come from all over to where your story takes place for their own reasons, and they didn't leave their cultural baggage behind. They take their grudges and their tastes with them. The places these characters do not matter to the story, but they influence the characters and how they approach things and that influence drives them to action. You need to turn your story into one of those jokes that begin with "An Irishman, an Arab, and a Japanese man walk into a bar". And like the joke, the story somewhat writes itself from there.

How big is your ideas bin, /wg/?

>>19875931
4763 words

I came, I saw, I conquered

OR

I came. I saw. I conquered.

OR

I came; I saw; I conquered

OR

I came: I saw: I conquered

OR

I came-I saw-I conquered

Which one?

>>19875931
at least 105,000 words. If you don't count half-executed novels and scripts

>>19875931
>unused author names
3
>unused titles/chapter names
3
>unused plot ideas
28
>unused quotes I wrote
21
>unused characters
9
>stories I'll never finish
17
>backburner stories I plan to work on
2
>active projects
2
>completed projects
2

Sometimes I read through all that shit and wonder what the fuck I was thinking. Sometimes I remember that I have good ideas in there waiting to be pulled out and capitalized on.

>been working on one novel since 2018 because I'm a procrastinating piece of shit and writing sucks up a lot of my energy
>still coming up with ideas for that will improve the story/characters in the last week
How do people feel satisfied with their novels? I'm terrified I'll consider it done, send it to someone I know, then come up with another way it could've been improved. That scares me almost as much as sending my work to someone for judgement.

>>19876023
You're doing it ass backwards. You ask your friends 'hey, how does this sound" and you tell them as briefly as possible the story. Try to do it verbally so you can actually see their body language to each turn of the story, see where they get confused or lose interest. Then do it again with someone else fixing it with the feedback. You keep retelling this version of the story until you can do the Paul Schrader thing where you can tell someone this story in a bar - get up midway to take a piss - sit back down and they tug on your sleeve asking to hear how it ends.

>>19876053
*retelling each new version of the story

Anyway the point is after you've gotten oral feedback about 10 times, then you know you're ready to write it

Is it "beet red" or "beat red" to show embarrassment?

>>19875988
pen names are very easy to do. You just take a three syllable first name, a three syllable middle name and a one syllable last name. For example:
>Atticus Gilligan Wright
>Hercules Jefferson Bell
>Elliott Cameron Clarke
>Christopher Sullivan Smith
If you told me these were real authors, I'd believe you

>>19876226
my middle initial is R so i added another R for good luck

>>19876226
What about 1 2 3?
>Kim Stanley Robinson
>Jeff Daughtry Huntington
>Tom Cooper Abraham

>>19876223
red like beets

>>19873568
how does it take more than 10 minutes to read 1000 words? is she retarded?

I did it!!!

I think there's some plot holes and I'm thinking of adding one more chapter, but I still think it's DONE!!! DONE!!! DONE!!!!

So does anyone want to read it?

>>19876298
sure, but sell me on it first

>>19876306
A basedboy learns to grow up with a little help from a cute blonde robot.

>>19876314
Is this the Emily story? You dumb faggot, I thought you were dead. I want to read it.

How much underage sex can I get away with?

>>19876317
Yes.

>>19876326
Post it.

>writing an action sci-fi piece
>multiple false starts
>character moments and humor are incredible
>action is a slog to write
>probably a slog to read too
>without the action, I lose all the appeal

What do I do?

>>19872358
All of my characters are female. I'm gonna have to change half of them to male. Otherwise, people will think it's some weird lesbian torture porn

What a pain

>>19875931
in need of pruning

>>19876319
You can get away with anything except children getting fucked by adults. Teen older sister and younger brother? Good to go. Twins exploring each other? Write it down! Cousins on walks during Thanksgiving for a little groping and touching in the backwoods? You know it dude.
>>19876335
What kind of action is it? Spaceship battles or fistfights in bars? The former is nearly always very boring no matter how you do it and the latter can be some of the most exciting parts of a book.

>>19875931
Too many ideas, not enough actual writing. Let alone my drawing progress...

>>19876330
Let me fix it on google docs

>>19876374
make sure we cant see the account name. a few friends have accidentally doxxed themselves this way

>>19876355
Closer to fistfights in bars, it's vigilantism. Sort of.

>>19876404
You might get mileage out of reading classic action books and seeing how they do combat. Treasure Island, for example. Books where man vs man combat is constant. I don't know what kind of technology scale your characters grapple with, but I'm sure there are plenty of sci-fi books with combat sequences.

>>19876425
Alright, thanks anon. I was going to base mine off of some of the scenes in Blood Meridian. So far that book has had the best action scenes I've read.

Are there any 'literary' action books? Seems like an oxymoron.

>>19876390
great.. now i'm too scared to post it since I'm computer illiterate

>>19876468
Oh, if you're going sci-fi/space Western, there's a boatload of Western novels you could read and some shows you could watch. The only /lit/ action book I can think of is Treasure Island, but even then the action scenes are short and fast, like action should be.
>>19876481
Google the answer to your problems friend.
https://support.google.com/docs/answer/2494888?hl=en
https://www.google.com/amp/s/bdtechtalks.com/2019/03/18/google-docs-link-sharing-identity-privacy/amp/
And don't you deprive me of robot waifus. I'm a crazy man.

What do you guys think is superior, non fiction straight philosophy, or fun fictional philosophical stories like candide?

>>19876657
Dramatic dialogue like Plato

Anyone try publishing on kindle? I'm still trying to figure it out.

Before him rested the pristine naked corpse of what was obviously once a profoundly beautiful young red-haired woman with the largest pair of tits he had ever seen. He followed the curves of her body with his eyes until he got to deep gashes down her wrists, leaving little guesswork about what had happened, with the death itself at least. Lying there too still to be peaceful, the weight of the world pulled on her towards the cold steel table, stretching the skin tight across her elegant facial features. It was the first dead body Lab Assistant #4 had ever seen, but he was determined to prove himself to Doctor Reiner, who was personally observing him of all people.

The woman's voluminous chest made it difficult to grab where he needed on the rib cage without his hand having to press down on some part of the abundant soft lifeless mound of flesh. *What was this woman, a 34F?* The softness of the flesh would make it difficult to get a firm grip on the corpse, like trying to stand sturdy on a waterbed. He realized that what he would have to do is cup the the large left inert tit of the dead woman. He gathered the woman's enormous breast up and out of the way and moved his hand down onto her ribs, and when he did he felt the cold soft flesh slowly spill over his hand as gravity did its work.

In his other hand he held a sharp surgical saw that he was supposed to use to saw through this woman's sternum. He swallowed and and began to lower the blade. As the blade drew closer he cycled through all the justifications he had thought of in anticipation to this moment: that it was just an inanimate object, a 'what' as opposed to a 'who', just a thing, and so on. Alas he hesitated the very moment the blade bore into the dead woman's pale flesh. He swallowed again, suddenly aware of just how very thirst he was.

"Take your time," the doctor said, smiling there almost too calm and peaceful to know what he could be thinking. "She's not going to get any deader, just less lifelike, if you know what I mean."

"It feels wrong, it feels like I'm doing something cruel and wicked," Lab Assistant #4 said after a moment's hesitation.

"Hmm..." The doctor mused allowed. "Lab Assistant Number Four, I'm sorry but could you tell me your name again?"

"Umm, it's Anthony Fauci."

"Ah yes, that's right, Mr. Fauci." Dr. Reiner said. "How could I forget. well... well Number Four, I understand where you're coming from, really I do. And although you won't admit it, I know what you want do. So take your time, and I shall return in 15 minutes." He patted him on the shoulder and calmly walked away, closing the surgical curtain behind him. He was now alone in the curtain-walled room, well if you don't count the beautiful naked woman in front of him.

>>19875975

I came. I saw. I conquered. or I came, I saw, I conquered.

I'd go for commas because it's a bit faster and i don't like slow things. But if i really wanted to make a point out of it i'd go with full stops. But that's like i implied, more cringe.

>>19876335
>action is a slog to write
How? Action is incredibly easy to write. You can basically just narrate a fight scene like you're watching it in slow motion.

>>19876729
What is there to figure out? It couldn't be simpler.

>>19875975
I came - I saw - I conquered.

>>19876922
This, I'd be curious to see a sample. Perhaps you're writing them out too long and are running out of steam? Or just need to add more ticking clocks or gimmicks (unique method of attack/location).

>>19876521
>>19876481
The way to circumvent that is
>save Google doc
>Export as pdf
>upload pdf to catbox.moe
>post link here
>???
>profit
If remaining anonymous is paramount. This is now the part where I feel smug for having alternate Google accounts to share without worry

Do you sin, fantasy writer anons?

>>19877701
Thank you. You can now all read my book for 15 minutes then declare it complete shit.

>>19878031
Glad to help.

Exercise: make a short story out of based on your Wordle guesses for today.

>>19878093
>Dog
>Hurry
>Malt
>Wash
>Give
>Win
hmmmm

>>19878286
Clearly a novel for Canadian girls.

>>19878288
My guess was Malt, not Knot

>>19878295
>not knot
who's there?

>>19878093
>thought it was swill for some reason
cucked again

>>19876729
I know the Reedsy youtube has one or two interviews with people about categories, summary writing, etc.

I'm always looking for writing oriented podcasts/blogs etc that aren't complete garbage so open to hear other recommendations.

>>19878312
Yonni

>>19878336
Yonni who?

>>19878344
Yonni Churrito

>>19877701
I'm more concerned with someone stealing my work. What if I post the PDF then some other fuck takes that PDF and declares it his own and gets all the copyrights and publishing before I do since I don't know how to do these things

>>19878449
Then just post the excerpt you want to show us

I successfully avoided writing a graphic rape scene where my protagonist is raped by a homeless woman because I remembered that earlier in the story he lost his penis. Incidentally, this is actually the central (and only) plot point in the novel, and it is a little worrying that I lost track of it. Instead, after giving him a lap dance, the homeless woman grabs his crotch and, upon finding him without penis, fights him in a cage match. I'm not sure who's winning yet.

>>19875975
#I came
#I saw
#I conquered

>>19878537
Does she just take him into an octagon somewhere and fistfight him to a crowd of confused but enthusiastic fans? Because that would be fucking hilarious.

Anyone ITT have any good examples of a story within a story where the inner story is the 'main' story? Think any of the short stories in the Arabian Nights.

>>19878622
Canterbury tales

>>19878537
>raped
>by a woman
lmaooo

>>19878677
Best version? Opinions online seem to be split.

>>19878616
Not... exactly. They're in the middle of a busy street, surrounded by pedestrians. When my narrator tells the homeless woman that he would like to leave, the pedestrians form a pentacle around them. They climb atop one another and contort themselves into something that approaches a literal wall (I go into depth describing this, of course, so the reader must acknowledge that it is a literal solid wall of crushed pedestrians. Then they fight.

>>19874584
Basically
>Some of the monsters are heroic, some are neutral, some are evil.
>It doesn't matter as to how good of a person you are, there WILL be collateral damage if you fight, considering what we're watching here is what amounts to a conflict between the closest things the world has to gods in the flesh.
That's it, really.

What is /wg/'s advice for writing more dynamic, real characters when it's someone you can't sympathetically write?

E.g. If you're a rich woman, how would you better write a poor man?
If you're college age, white and outspoken, how would you better write an old, shy black man?
If you're educated and from the West coast, how would you better write a college dropout from the deep south?

Some of my best and most interesting characters for my novel are very far from my personal identity, but I want to write them in a way that both encapsulates my vision, but actually stays true to who they might actually exist as. It pisses me off when writers write one character to perfection but then have others who are so obviously an ignorant joke.

Recourses? Advice? Anecdotes?

>>19876284
she was prob reading past where he said stop within that 10 min. Did someone really have to fucking spell that out?

Is there a point to writing anime esque fight scenes in a novel?
If your setting is in the military how you make it exciting without the reading cringing and just want a manga or visual representation

>>19878798
interesting. reminds me of an idea I have where the mc works at a walmart equivalent, drives this piece of shit car and lives with his aging, ailing mother. its a world with super powered humans. he discovers he can get powers when he huffs paint thinner. in the beginning the audience will be questioning whether or not its just hallucinations and his, for example, junky tier retard strength lets him do seemingly super human things.
your story sounds fun can't wait to read it

>>19879396
>E.g. If you're a rich woman, how would you better write a poor man?
People are individuals. One homeless guy is not the same as another, although the choices they made or bad luck then endured may create similarities.
So how do you write more dynamic, real characters, of whatever persuasion or type? Give them realistic goals that they want to achieve. And don;'t be afraid of making your people of crime, I mean color, capable of being intrinsically bad people. Intrinsically bad people exist. There are a lot of them everywhere.

>>19879546
>anime esque fight scene
each medium has strengths and weaknesses. so you're never going to get the slash slash kwaping boom boom visual and audio bullshit that anime allows. novels allow for better setup and discussion of character motivations than anime does. lean on those strengths. the fight scene itself may be relatively short, but getting to it and discussing emotions while in the middle of it, as a military example, a man being shelled by artillery while crouching in a foxhole and thinking about his wife and infant child.

>>19872477
I always read /wg/ in my head as "ouija."

>>19879652
For me its dubyah gee

>>19879746
wug

Anyone here write comedies like hitch hikers guide to the galaxy or candide?

>>19879797
wiggy

How do I avoid being pretentious? How do I know if I'm being pretentious?

>>19880000
Don't sacrifice sensical plot and characters for high concept bullshit, symbolism, or themes. Make people speak normally for the time period they're in. If you think you're writing TRVE ∧RT, slap yourself and remind yourself that you aren't and you're a fucking hack. Prioritize legibility of text over flowery language, write for the common man/woman.
Really, if you have to ask this you haven't read enough books. It's very easy to identify pretentious writing.

>>19880000
write what you know

>>19880085
I think that's what I'm doing
I feel an idea inside and its developing but it's fairly abstract and I'm worried the way I'm writing it, and the way I feel like I have to to get across the idea, is gonna end up being pretentious.

Any advice on writing a novella with two protagonists?

Aaahhhhhhh I want to publish my book on Amazon already so I can share it with the test of you guys, but I need to wait for my beta readers to finish up

>>19880257
make them kiss :3

>>19880257
Focus on what their relationship is and how it changes with the events

>>19880257
learn how to ask questions

>best selling books are blank bullshit like a fancy journal or scrap book
>Can get these things at Walmart for 1/3 the cost
>People still buy crap like blank journals diaries and calendars
Fuck

>>19880614
>/lit/ endgame is designing blank book covers and hiring some jabrony to stitch pages together
The absolute state

>>19880708
Don't let the pseud marketing anon discover this or we'll be a distribution chain general by the end of the week.

>>19880723
Too late, I just read it.
I’ve known blank journals sell well for a while. That’s not what I’m interested in.
I’m genuinely interested in changing the world through meaningful text. Money is a means to an end.

>>19880760
.....So Mandala coloring books?

Does anyone want to criticize a piece of my story?

>>19880987
Just post a screenshot, someone'll shit on it sooner or later

>>19880987
>>19881003
there

>>19881036
>He was a big guy
I'm gonna have fun with this

>>19881036
I'm not even going to read past that first paragraph because holy christ is that some stilted prose.
>The solider was large, in fact he was a giant at over two and a half meters tall. His dark armor covered every square centimeter of his body, save for two holes which exposed eyes just as dark as the material around them. His head rose and the red guard looked into those dark pits, seeing not the rage of a man but a more simple, innocent desire for violence. It was as though the solider was a child who saw her as nothing more than an insect to step on, an object for his own amusement and pleasure.
I wrote the above without stopping or even thinking about it and it not only flows better than what you wrote, but is also more intelligible because it explains who "she" is. Please, for the love of god, read more books. My writing isn't even any good most of the time and it's still better than yours.

>>19879915
I wrote an absurd comedy that's in beta readers mode now. I had a fucking ride with it

>>19881036
>Paragraph 1
Possess sounds more like he has the armor in his possession rather than wearing it. You could probably restructure that sentence to correct that if you can't come up with a facy word for bearing garments.

>Paragraph 2
This one is very repetitive. "The next thing the lady knew was that she got fucking crushed."

>Paragraph 3
The start of this one made me wonder if I was reading fantasy or interracial erp. Since para. 2 should be cut a bit, you could summarize this one as well, and mix them into a single paragraph

>Paragraph 4 & 5
You could just say they were armed to the teeth. "the first to suffer were those who had the hardest time escaping, the children, the elderly, those vandals who kept nothing to themselves;" this part needs to get its punctuation fixed, and vandals sounds like it refers to the bad guys. If you're gonna rape a kid don't halfass it; get juicy like with the heroine a couple sentences up or barely hint at it "while another group rounded up a bunch of squealing children into an alley..."

From reading this, I gather this is the big dramatic moment where the hero gets rekt and the grimdark begins. I think you should put a bit more care on the "instant loss" moment

How do we reconcile the fact that if we do make it big, we're going to be associated with this racist, sexist, misogynist, right wing, extremist, machine known as 4chan? Then get completely destroyed and cancelled forever?

>>19881325
>implying you can be cancelled if you don't submit
All controversies die within 4 weeks these days. Also, bold of you to assume I'm not racist, sexist, misogynist, "right wing", extremist, and all the other "bad guy" labels.

>>19881036
I don't care about prose. So I won't comment on it. I do care about plot and characters though. Regrettably, right now, there is neither. Moments without dramatic tension and bland shapes moving without volition – that's about all you've got. A village getting raided is not – contrary to popular belief – in itself dramatic: it's noisy, but it's boring. Hell, critiquing it is boring too. I gots to git the pigs off the porch before the missus returns from church time or else...

>>19881140
The truth is, I haven't written or read something in years, and also, my main language is Spanish, and that's a direct translation

>>19881036
>she did not find
stopped reading there

>>19881366
Thank fucking god you're not actually that bad in your native language, probably.

>>19881325
>Hey Timmy, is it ture that you had your begginings on the literally hitler website 4chan???
>>Yea but I'm totes sorry blm acab
>Ok :)

>>19881325
>Oh, yeah, I use 4chan. It's a social media.
Not hard

>>19881352
Yeah that's my main problem with my writing, I can't put the "feeling" into it, it's all so simply and bland :(

>>19881424
Write in first person as a character who lacks emotion, the express the emotion through the reactions of other characters (which are basically a side-note in the main character's mind). Simple solution.

>>19881424
How's my cover? I smell kindle publishing bros. I haven't felt this elated in a long time. Not so much the money or anythig, I don't expect to make a dime, but I FINISHED A BOOK!!!

>>19881448
>low quality cover
will not buy

>>19881456
I hate you people.

>>19881448
Congratulations on finishing your book anon. I'm a newfag to these threads, but I suppose you're the Emily bot guy?

It's not a particularly eye-catching cover, but it's noticeable that you made it yourself, and that gives it a bit of soul in on itself.

I'm taking some courses on Adobe Illustrator at the moment and felt like giving my stuff covers for practice. What are the measurements you used to make that?

>>19881448
The cover is fine to me. It could use a professional's touch to make it really pop. You really most need to increase the blurb's length and add a little section about the author at the end. Make up some reviews from beta reading you can staple on as well to make it look more appealing.

Alright fags, desert level time:

https://youtu.be/QD0PmMDBZow

I'm starting the first drafts for an arabian nights kind of deal where a guy travels with a caravan and hears from the other travellers. He'll learn the culture and folklore while facing the sands' many dangers on his journey to port. What sounds more interesting to (you)?;
>Guy hangs out evenly with the caravan members, maybe decides to stay with them by the end
>Guy makes friends with the slave cargo who gives worldbuilding through stories and either buys her freedom once at the destination or helps her escape

I've come to except I have a fragile ego and can't handle harsh criticism. I don't like being called stupid/ignorant for writing what I write. I'd never make it into the industry regardless, so whatever.

>>19881478
>>19881478
Sorry I dont' remember. I slapped it together pretty quickly. It looked 100% better on adobe than it does on 4chan though. I think I'm goign to have to take real pictures instead of trying to computer generate one.

>>19881505
Accept, fucking fuck my life

>>19881509
>It looked 100% better on adobe
Vectors are tricky, cheeky cunts.

....Computer generated? Like, the cover or the woman?

Can you get excited for your own work or do you see it entirely mechanically?

I know I couldn't shake the feel of mechanical insight of my drawings when I started but as I got better I started surprising even myself, that still hasn't happened with writing

>>19881505
I love criticism because it lets me be motivated out of spite. I should have known kinda thing. It's how you get better. It shows that your work at least got some kind of reaction from others.

>>19881495
>>19881495
>It could use a professional's touch to make it really pop.
I agree, but I don't think I want to spend the money here. I may have to change the font and try my best.
>You really most need to increase the blurb's length and add a little section about the author at the end.
That'll come soon
>Make up some reviews from beta reading you can staple on as well to make it look more appealing.
That's where you guys come in!

>>19881525
both. I did cheat on the woman though, I just edited a stock photo, rotated, cropped, and changed some of the vectors, angles, and points. Mass Effect 2 style technique.

I'm just going to go to some random cute blonde blue eyed girl and ask to take a picture then crop it. That's probably my best shot.

>>19881502
>desert level
https://youtu.be/vTRcQ7lvdS8
Do you know how long I've waited to share this

>>19881539
How tech literate are you?

>>19881563
Not all that literate at all.

>>19879540
It's /lit/ so you should expect people who aren't able to extrapolate from incomplete information here.

>>19880257
I'm doing a book like that and I'm struggling a bit too in how to subtly portray their differences in opinion when I switch back and forth between viewpoints without being too blatant.

>>19881561
Barely any desert vibes, here's what the desert sounds like

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ypuaJLHK_LQ

>>19881502
Caravan members. You can do more with a varied worldview that way. Add the slave cargo as a subplot for more enhanced worldbuilding

>>19881529
I get excited thinking about parts I want to write all day long at work, daydreaming and zoning out and just itching to get out a notepad or sit in front of my computer to start writing ideas down but when I get home, and even on the weekends, I can't just do it. I have libre open the entire time and I just don't know where to start putting my ideas into words. I've got almost 10 chapters down but the motivation dies when I'm at the edge.

>>19881448
Her forehead is big so you should right justify the title and put it there. Takes up the empty space. The font choice itself is awful. Especially the black outline. The tilde lines are awful and completely useless. You already made the font large and differentiate it from the body text, which, by the way, isn't full justified, what the actual fuck, and what's with all this bullshit empty space on the bottom left. The spine is inconsistent in all the wrong ways. How bad at book covers can you be?

Your fundamentals are all really shitty, and this isn't even going into any sort of meaning or meta narrative issues with what the book actually means, who the lady is, why we should care, why you even thought that was a good idea.

The bigger problem is that no one on /wg/ listens to advice about their book cover. They listen to writing advice, the thing they are supposed to be good at, and yet they refuse to take any advice about kerning or leading or white space or font. It's absolutely horse shit.

>>19881529
I get extremely excited about my work. Sometimes I'll be in some innocuous place and I'll get an idea and I'll stop whatever I'm doing to jot it down. Especially when you're getting close to writing parts that are important to the narrative and you know once you hit it that all the puzzle pieces will fall together, it's very invigorating.

>>19881637
well thanks. Good thing I ran it through here before I finalized it. Back to the drawing board.

>>19881574
Then I'll give it a shot myself. Worst case scenario is that your cover will be the better one.
Post the riginal picture of the lady in that cover and also 2 or 3 covers that you like for reference. I'll do something with it and show you next time I catch you here. U want?

>>19881637
Thanks.
>and what's with all this bullshit empty space on the bottom left.
Fill it with my author's details and fake quotes. Which I haven't gotten to yet.
>The spine is inconsistent in all the wrong ways.
Thanks, i'll redo it.
>How bad at book covers can you be?
I'm not an expert in either art or design.
>Your fundamentals are all really shitty,
Untrained in any area of art and design.
>and this isn't even going into any sort of meaning or meta narrative issues with what the book actually means, who the lady is, why we should care, why you even thought that was a good idea.
It looked good in my head.

Do you know what resources I can utilize to get a good cover?

>>19881637
>>19881637
>The bigger problem is that no one on /wg/ listens to advice about their book cover. They listen to writing advice, the thing they are supposed to be good at, and yet they refuse to take any advice about kerning or leading or white space or font. It's absolutely horse shit.
Why are you so angry? I'm literally listening to you right now. I even know it's shit, but that's why we're here. To learn and improve. As for how I got the idea, I just googled book covers and got a bunch of sexy vampires, girls, warriors, eyeballs, and other sexy women on their covers and just rolled with it.

>>19881695
>>19881726
Sorry, I'm so used to /wg/ being retarded and not constructive when it comes to this stuff. I'd use adobe indesign, it gives you the most control and it's meant for publishing.

I want you to go to your bookshelf and look at the covers and see which ones you like the most, then try to see what things they all do well. What colors stand out? How do they give contrast? How does the eye move around? The font? Where they position text vs the picture? How do each of the individual parts culminate into a whole?

>>19872358
Hey lads, having my friend who does academic editing professionally edit my current novel.

His edit is on the right. My original is on the left. Story is a fantasy genesis/creation story. I didn't realise his edit would be him basically re-writing everything I wrote but what do you guys prefer? I've asked a few other people and got a 50/50 response between the edit and original. I like some of the edit better but feel it is adding structure to abstract concepts which loses the mysticism of my writing, but that may be me as a salty writer. I have purposely attempted to leave things vague for people to paint with their mind's eye rather than give it defined form.

I know the TN: Translation shit is bad in my original, that was just there for my purpose to easily go back and write into the appendices later.

>>19881748
How about this one I just made on canvas using their assets?

>>19881561
>>19881616
Thanks for the reqs, but I'm lucky to have my Tinariwen playlist ready for the ocasion. Godspeed fellow desert partakers

>>19881781
@humans of flat design

>>19881749
his is much better. The word choice, flow, prose, accessibility, and imagination is 10x better

Okay fuck it, covers are too hard, I'll have to sleep on it. I can't just dump shit and hope something sticks

>>19881781
I like it better. I would move the author name into the white space, make it the same blue. I'd also spend some time moving around the title to find the perfect place. Maybe over the face, maybe right justified or full justified. I don't know. It has all the right elements and it's in the right direction.

>>19881809
>>19881448
Your cover is okay.
Your title is terrible.
Imagine trying to recommend this book to a friend what they’d have to search up.
No numbers unless it’s rememberable like Fahrenheit 451.
EM-10493Y is not memerable.

>>19881809
Anon, the cover for my royalroad is awful but I never bothered to change it. I have had some experience with graphic design and it's still awful. I'm better at crit than actually doing it. It's part of the reason I got out of graphic design. I just couldn't be GOOD, I was always only OKAY.

>>19881836
I like it

except the outline on the name

>>19881849
I found this version at a half price books. It was so awful I HAD to buy it. Look how thick John Milton's outline is, and look how the J isn't even fully filled in. Look how the top box has a drop shadow but the bottom one doesn't. The multi layered see thru bits. It's so fucking awful. I love it. The copy of the book is also center justified too, so reading it is a nightmare. And what does paradise lost even have to do with an island. It's so bad. Best 5 bucks I ever spent.

>>19881781
If you can't read text in the thumbnail, readers won't be able to read it at a distance or online. Maybe increase the weight of EM-10493Y.

Also feels like the title should be justified differently, like >>19881815 said, but that's more minor.

>>19881890
>If you can't read text in the thumbnail, readers won't be able to read it at a distance or online.
That's a great point.
I like this anon's suggestion too
>>19881829
I'll probably change the title now, both of you guys have great points. I also like the KISS method the other anon suggested too.

We're all going to have something on Amazon kindle like F. Gardner too.

>>19881907
Stop glorifying a mentally ill megalomaniac

>>19881907
>We're all going to have something on Amazon kindle like F. Gardner too.
That fucker didn't listen to anyone on /wg/'s advice either.

Come up with the bones for a traditional western story right now

>>19881805
Thanks anon, the feedback is appreciated. Any specific examples?

>>19881986
John Chinaman meets Rebel Deserter Hutton Williamson as East meets West trying to make money in California selling chickens.

Side characters such as Malley O'Keefe, Irish immigrant, Montez Escobar, a relic from the old Spanish Empire, Freeman Jones, a racist black man from the north, Titus Cotton, a recently freed slave from the south in the service of Jones, and Native Running Wind still holding onto his Native ways.

WHAT WILL HAPPEN WHEN ALL THESE MEN COME INTO CONFLICT IN THE 1860's WILD WILD WEST CALIFORNIA?!

>>19882059
*WHIP CRACKS*
*GUITAR FINGERING ENSUES*

>>19882059
I can immediately picture the Mexican stand off for the final showdown

hello i usually screenwrite but am trying to write a novel and see how i do since i love cormac's stuff so much. if this was the first page would you keep reading?

>>19882133
Probably not. Your protagonist seems like the classic "my only personality trait is being the manliest man to ever walk planet earth" action hero. Protagonists like that are personally a giant turn off

>>19882133
>like a star plunging towards earth
stopped reading there

>>19882126
"You stupid black man always steal chicken! Get job and buy own!"
"Yea' John Chinaman, you tell that nigger his kind ain't wanted around these parts."
"You're one to talk Gringo. Only one that don't belong here is you."
"Another Castizo thinks he owns this land. Did you not fornicate with enough blacks?"
"Ain't nobody touching me ya damn redskin. T'ht nigga there wit the chickin is my property. Ya'll better scuttle out of here before I sneeze ono you again."
"N'sum, You not muh massa anymore. Imma freed just like you now. Dat dem red hair craka aint gunna put me back in chains,"
"Naw, You all best deuter along now like wee men."

>>19882133
Very dinamic. Like a string of thoughts. The other anons note that all we know from your character is that he's a Solid snake coolguy™, but I think it works. You'll have to make him more than just a cold blooded killer in the rest of the story though, and "I looked at a butterfly once when I was a kid" won't cut it

That's for your writing and characters. Grammar-wise, you could probably use a term different to Line of work the second time you said it, and although I didn't see anything wrong with it when I read it , an asteroid might fit better than a star.... Or a pair of concrete shoes in water, since we're playing cool

Comments on my phone writing?

>>19882247
>and the landscape had changed around him
stopped reading there

>>19882247
>It
Stopped reading right there

>>19882247
>10:49
stopped reading here

>>19882247
Are you going for an Isekai kinda thing? Because this looks like an Isekai kinda thing.

You have the cooking recipe of what happens, but you're writing a story, not a cooking list. Between these steps
>Gene was walking around town when he gets transported
>He looks around, he's in a forest
>Something gets close so he runs away
>Preheat oven at 110°c for 30 minutes
You need more substance to hold it together

>>19882302
Yeah, I can see that. Kinda tryna to stray away from the detached-stiff writing I usually do

I understand why the world was is so hard on me recently. I was becoming too good. My writing is superb right now. That's why the world tries to fuck me over. Fucking work, fucking private life, possibility of homelessness again, everything.

The world is against me. It wouldn't be fair otherwise.

>>19882384
Just be a teacher bro.
>Teach some bullshit using online classes
>Get off at 2:00 p.m.
>Work on book until 8:00 p.m.
>Get breaks to work on book
>All the while actually getting paid enough to not be homeless
>Can sell said shit book to stupid kids later

>https://youtu.be/vACZA9dGvV4

I'm still on the worldbuilding phase of the story, so I made something brief to get the concept of how the caravan works down. Thoughts?

>>19881986
In a town deep in the American West, one man will stop at nothing to earn a bag of oranges, then next he will eat a loaf of bread and have his first-ever trip to a zoo to try a bunch of peasant-style toys with a big grin on his face.

For the first time in five years, a man with a disability will buy, buy and sell as much food, live for and eat for a month and, without a day off, enjoy as many as $6,000 a month at a zoo full of children. It's really a moment. A million dollars, a year or so, a gallon of milk, no matter what you have. It's the ultimate.

However, Friesa Farms founder Jeff Greenman and his criminal client, the National Chicken Club of New York, are willing to do "what we've been doing" as part of a national campaign to stop the man from urning his oranges and eating a million loaves of bread. At any cost to Jeff Greenman.

>>19882402
>Can sell said shit book to stupid kids later
jokes on you kids don't even know what books are let alone read

>>19882402
>>All the while actually getting paid enough to not be homeless
lmao you must not be aware of how little american teachers get paid

is it ok to have it third person with the chapters of your protag but then switch to first person during a few chapters focusing on a side character?

>>19882422
>worldbuilding
Yes. I have a thought you are not going to like. That autistic shit about the caravan, and dimensions, and calculating the exact number of people involved, having them all be father and son (why?), including women in a caravan when really there's no need, having the age of people in the caravan be from puberty to old men when in reality it'd pretty much just be working age men.
So all that shit, as unrealistic as you made it aside? Irrelevant to your story. For a caravan you need drivers, guards and people to help haul shit. Exact numbers? Irrelevant. You would be much better served knowing about the fantastical lizard they're using to pull it than any of that shit you wrote.
But you know why all that "worldbuilding" is irrelevant? Becasue the mechanics of the caravan are something no one will give 2 fucks about. The caravan exists to get stuff from point A to point B. That's all that matters. The exact logistics? Irrelevant. Create you characters, get their personalities down, and put them on their adventure. Don't waste time counting the number of spokes in a wagon wheel.

https://youtu.be/axXn_Vn2vYo

You fags need to have sex instead of write.

>>19882789
If it works, sure.

>>19882824
I fucking hate the school of life so much. Fuck that narrator. Fuck their writers. False authority spews forth from their content.

>>19882824
Now i am going to write a fanfic where the boy and the girl fuck

>>19882789
I don't see why you'd give side characters 1st person pov while the mc is stuck in 3rd. I could see the opposite, but really I'd just keep everything either in 1st or 3rd.

>>19882862
How do you write in 2nd? Or 4th? Where the audience yells at the characters to do something

>>19882876
>How do you write in 2nd?
I never mentioned 2nd or 4th, but 2nd would be a choose your own adventure book. 4th would be for schizophrenics.

>>19882791
oooh, big reply! And it makes sense, so thanks anon

I can’t believe any of you are dumb enough to have a trad publisher pay you 8% of your true earnings then turn around and thankfully gargle their cock for robbing you

>>19882960
my book is untradpublishable due to the nature of its sexual content and political messaging

>>19882960
If you can find anyone willing to publish a book with the pure romance between a fifteen year old boy and a seven foot wolf girl pleadr tell me

>>19883040
Are you sure it's not just bad?

>>19883090
compared to at least half the shit that's trad published these days the quality is fine. I tangentially say bad things about the you know who's

>>19883108
Bro, Star Trek is one of the most popular series of all time and has overt Jewish stereotypes in it's aliens

>>19883118
that was created 50+ years ago. grandfathered in. I make negative comments about the covenant with their god and the fact that they deserve to answer for their crimes against humanity

>>19883126
The series I posted is from the 90s and you'd be surprised how accurate it gets with the jews. You can't even type out the word Jews which means you're a pussy nigger anyway

>>19883140
fuck off kike faggot

Do you write flawlessly and on point 100% of the time or are you the one who writes about a topic first without correcting errors or the one that corrects typos and misthoughts as he goes?
I produce typos and grammatical hiccups but i don’t understand the don’t stop for correcting errors type of people. Of course i edit my words and sentences right away. There is no other way. I must correct my errors immediately or i die. Thus, to write flawlessly is a valid choice to lessen my fear of death.

>>19883108
>fine
Yeah, so try bringing that quality up from "fine" to "good," or maybe "really good," or even "excellent" before complaining about why your hack fiction about DA JOOZ is unpublishable. I guarantee you, if it were written well, it'd get published. Your book isn't unpublished because it's got objectionable content. It's unpublishable because it is, by your own admission, extremely fucking mediocre.

>>19883348
I don't make grammatical errors... ever, really. Everything I write is, at a baseline, a decently-flowing, polished collection of words that would be publishable for most people. When I go back and edit, which I am literally constantly doing, I'm editing mostly to find and then tease out the rhythm and flow of sentences and paragraphs, making sure that the prose isn't just publishable but excellent. I write pretty slowly, but it's important to me to be able to look back after a session and feel good about what I've written—to feel that I'm at least 75% of the way there with respect to quality. It's just agonizing if I can't be proud of what was written in that moment, and it slowly saps the joy of the process over time until I'm left burnt-out.

>>19883348
Writing through grammatical errors takes stream of consciousness too far for me. I only do that if my brain is too loud for me to focus and what I usually end up doing is writing gibberish to get all the junk out. I find it's usually an effect of still being in life mode and not in writing mode. Anyways, tangent aside, when I make a typo or the sentence isn't how I'd like it grammatically, I will stop and edit it before continuing on. It rarely slows my progress.

I got my 7th rejection e-mail today.

>>19883948
I never got a rejection because I don't have a clue where to start for traditional publishing

>>19872358
Why does fanfiction never get any respect?

>>19883948
Why do you only want 8-15% of your own book profits?

>>19883975
Netflix deals

>>19883978
Uhuh, tell us when that happens.
In the mean time, keep us posted on your willfull financial rape.

>>19883975
For the prestige. I want to be able to show my mom I got a real book published.

>>19883982
>>19883975
Can you please kindly fuck off? This is the writing general, not the marketing general. You're about half a post away from jerking yourself off to mention
>heh... me? haha well im SELF-published... ha... you might have heard of it... you've probably heard of me, im a pretty big deal... SELF-published, heh. wave i told you how much i make? my currency accumulation is going fantastic, since you asked. i'm gonna be able to Purchase the Thing i always wanted!
like dude, just go away. we want to talk about writing.

WRITING.

>>19883994
Shh, you'll make him talk about his twitter followers

>>19883994
Sorry, hold on, I had to take my editor’s cock out of my mouth so I could type out a reply.
I’m sure glad I don’t have to market and I can pay someone else to do it for me you know?

>>19883965
Because the characters, setting, worldbuilding, and most of the plot is already done for you. It's like painting by numbers.

I had a dream last night where the heroine of my story was drugged and fucked by some random dude in graphic detail. What the fuck is wrong with my subconscious? I didn't ask for any fucking cuck dreams goddammit

How am I supposed to beat Gaddis? I'm increasingly convinced that he's the alpha and the omega of postwar American fiction. What will be our major landmark? Post-internet? Are we the post-internet literary movement? The epoch more immediately following the second war was much more firmly rooted in the immediacy of its time, the immediacy of the fracturing and dispersal of thought and attention. Where are we now? The fracture is almost wholly complete. Where the postwar postmodernists used third-person narrative accounts as the lingua franca of disrepair, literature seems now to have regressed into a collection of I's professing I-itude; in their strict capacity as fragments they are each attemptive wholes; they are so wholly absorbed in themselves in this capacity that they miss the movements of the supra-whole they in actuality compose. Gaddis and Pynchon and the very short list of their like retained in their time that contemporary detachment-from, which is primarily in addition the observation-of. I know what I want to write—the simultaneous participation-in and observation-of in melding-with and subsumption-under the seeping miasma which poured from the corpse of God in the wake of the second war and by the way I've never really had religion but I'm not opposed to it.

What's so bad about present tense? The action is happening now. Action is always acute. Present tense is the tense of acuteness. So why not use it?

>>19884223
All the noobs love it because it seems cool, but no one can use it right and its reputation is ruined.

>>19884208
That's just your subconscious ladies seeking other men because you're not fulfilling their needs. You gotta take an active role in their sex lives anon. I used to have dreams of having sex with my female leads. Then I started beating off to them servicing me. Then I got my friend to draw porn of them with my male leads, and now that they're paired up and satisfied in the story, I still fuck them on occasion. It's like authorial prima nocta.

>>19884223
I wouldn't Present as "bad" but it is unnatural. Past tense is the default in storytelling in spoken language since pre-history because a person is recounting a past legend or in day-to-day life we often share things that happened to us.

Sharing something as we actively do it in spoken language is often reserved for technical/cooperative activities (cooking a new recipe together, carrying a heavy couch up narrow spiral stairs).

Written langauge is a reflection of spoken language so these norms carry over for many. For me as a reader, reading present tense feels like the narrator is in some weird time dilation to continually provide me live details as they're struggling to survive or in an argument.

>>19876922
>Action is incredibly easy to write. You can basically just narrate a fight scene like you're watching it in slow motion
Yeah, but it's never good or fun to read.

>>19884253
There is a right and a wrong way in using present tense? Can you give an example (or several, if you'd be so kind) of someone using present tense correctly?

>>19884305
The right way is what is pleasant to read and serves the narrative, the bad way is what makes you roll your eyes and stop reading. The Quantum Thief by Hannu Rajaniemi is the only solid example I can think of where the tense was used competently, and where the story benefits from being so tied to the present moment.

>>19884305
It's almost exclusively stream of consciousness. If first person present ever devolves into a series of "I walk, I look, I think" statements, it's a failure. Some of this is unavoidable, but avoiding its devolution into a running grocery list of actions and thoughts takes a lot of artistry, especially without a framing device, which allows the reader to comfortably take his place as the third person in the room as another listens to another relating a story in present tense. Failing that, it is almost a given that the narrator is unreliable, and that the prose reads like his internal monologue as he experiences itself. It fails when it reads like dictation, and succeeds where it reads like tapping into a keg and drinking from the spigot.

>>19884284
Unless it's in present tense.

>>19883373
>in order to get published you need to write better than 90% of everything that's currently being published
did your bullshit sound reasonable when you typed it? because that's fucking retarded. besides, my book doesn't have enough trans lesbian bipoc women of color in it to appeal to the modern trad publishing industry
>da jooz
the thing the jews worship requires a flesh offering from every male child. this mutilation has a profound impact both on the psyche of everyone that experiences it, as well as being physically debilitating - for life. no surprise that removing half the erogenous tissue is bad. so clearly the thing the jews worship, the god of abraham, isn't the creator of the universe. at best its a sand demon. most likely its some schizophrenic delusion that got a bit out of hand. for their crimes against humanity the jews need to be exterminated, and both israel and yahweh worship must be destroyed.

>>19884743
meds

>>19884763

>>19884763
My meds only work if you take yours

I write not to be loved, but to feel love myself

>>19885750
>>19884208
You two need to sit together

>>19881749

His is better, but both are abominable, anon. Sorry to say it but you might as well know so you don't waste time trying to publish it.

>>19873761
the count of monte cristo?

>>19881140
>more simple, innocent desire for violence
dont like this sentence
>an object for his own amusement and pleasure.
redundant. nicer with only the previous sentence

>>19884786
>mfw story I'm writing is technically about the antichrist

>>19886924
>don't read the source text
>complain about the edit to the source test
Sasuga retard-san

>>19886977
Is he the good guy?

>captcha: 2w YWH

>>19887004
It is portrayed as good but an antagonistic force of nature/technology. It's not lionizing transhuman utopia but rather exploring how the confusion and shame involved in facing something that "saved the world" from war.
I actually don't know what to call the thing yet but I came up with a few titles alluding to its apotheosis. At first I was unaware of the gnostic equivalents, I mainly had the "spirit of babylon" idea in mind and split it up into the three aspects of the antichrist and the beast(s) and the dragon that gave it power. Because of the spirit of babylon concept, discussions led me to the demiurge and egregore as godlike emergent properties of mankind assuming the spirit of babylon was always part of us, yada yada. At this point I dont know what to call the three things but their animal motifs are the Phoenix, the Scorpion and the Snake respectively. Thought that might be too vanilla.

>>19887071
I now want a squid onesie
>exploring how the confusion and shame involved in facing something that "saved the world" from war.
I'm dumb I didnt understand what this meant

desu names like "The Snake, the Scorpion, the Phoenix" are as common in naming monsters as "The Shapeless Whore under the Pentagram in Salem", so just go with what you like more

>>19883994
No, it’s too funny that you fags are walking straight into a pit and swatting at the hand trying to pluck you out of harms way.
Continue course.>>19883994

>>19887071
>Phoenix, Scorpion, Snake
Call it "Animal Farm"

Any good books or online classes on how to write characters when you're autistic? I have no issues with plotting and world building but all my characters come off as robots.

>>19887193
A: post examples

B: there's some yt videos on that wich might help you. Before buying books or classes you could try that and see how you improve

>>19887100
>didn't understand what this mean
A lot of how Christians and others tend to think of the apocalypse is something evil on its face, perhaps something you can fight back or hide. While there are certainly aspects of that in the Bible, I wanted to play more off of Daniel's description of the "they shall be holpen with little help" and the flattery aspect.
So it'd be a utopia where all the antichrist followers are nice, grateful, not bitter or pushy, endlessly productive. Without getting into the theology of it, the confusion comes in that the "good Christian" see himself morally inferior by a large margin, he is like a dog or some kind of beast with an impulse for curses and violence. He feels guilty simply for not being enlightened like his fellows, so the shame is in that he is allowed to live but never self-actualize. He cannot go for years without caving in frustration that he is the one in the wrong because he can't find anyone to relate to.

>>19887330
You're correct in that the apocalypse is often depicted as a catastrophe nowdays, but that's more of a recent coat of paint. I'ts been years since I last read the bible but I do remember the end times being a unified earth where being on the side of the antichrist gets you cool stuff and staying faithful gets you banned from sports bars.

Good on you for taking that angle, hope you write something interesting with the idea of sticking to what's right even if it makes life objectively shit. I had a similar idea playing around in my mind a bit back, but it went nowhere

>>19887200
All my characters feel like they're cut from the same cloth, like walking arcs and plot devices, they aren't believable, or relatable, or likeable, or quirky, or anything, I don't know how to flavor them apart from what they contribute to the plot. I can't relate to what people other than me want or need, so I don't feel like I'm qualified to write about it, I'm kinda detached from normal social life so I don't know how to write interesting people behavior.

>>19887378
Thanks for the perspective, life's full of doomposters these days but in a way I think and end-times where we are corrupted to death by "peace" is more horrifying because no one would resist it, and trying to understand the irrational (not necessarily wrong) mindset of a protagonist resisting it is maddening. Trying to avoid cliches with clear "oh oops they actually were evil all along lets fight the skeleton army" but instead push the madness to the brink.

New bread >>19887398

>>19887393
Maybe you can write about a robot that struggles to empathize

>>19887393
you can read books and watch movies. th characters you see in fiction will be far more itneresting than people you encounter in daily life

>>19881749
Honestly, I don't like either. The word choice feels off. "she formulated her first goal" sounds dry and clinical when it looks like you're trying to mythical here. Other times it comes across as needlessly purple. "her exuberance propelled her into the dim miasma". I can see where you're going with this, and I think it's a neat scene idea, but you need to take another crack at this.

>>19887807
Thanks for the honest feedback. Funnily enough both those two examples were from my friend (he had some suggestions back when I first started writing it). I think when he is done editing this chapter I may go back and take another crack at it and send it to the new thread and see what people's thoughts are.

>>19887817
Well done on potentially doxxing yourself and self-publishing your work online, anon.