/lit/ - Literature

I want to suck on her titties

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHGNf6nWUm0

>>19416463
>literally died and came back
>still shilling fucking Story Genius for prose of all things
Eat shit

>>19416574
It was just in the OP stuff from a thread on the archive that I had to use because there wasn't one in the catalog to copy/paste.

Haven't been here in a while. But im back, and gonna try to write a book again and fail at it.

>>19416754
This time you will not fail

how many manuscripts do you guys have written?
3 complete (2 trash), 3 half-complete, 1 concept (10k words, mostly notes)
>>19416463
terf mommy

How to deal with the words on the page not being as good as the story in your mind? It's perfect in my head, but mediocre at best when executed. Just write more until you get it?

Link to Previous thread if you're interested.
>>19398060

Gonna try to start writing a short story today for a different experience.

>>19416858
Good stuff

Writing short stories for the flash fiction anthology was great practice I found

>>19416793
I have one unfinished that's about 30k words

I just finished my latest manuscript, a poetry collection for the 18-35 demo, consisting mostly of previously published poems. Problem is, I have no idea what to do with it. Agents hate representing poets, and indie presses are currently packed to the brim with LGBTQ+ bullshit. Anyone know of any publishers worth checking out?

>>19416809
first drafts are always trash dude just keep re-writing until its good
>>19416920
>poetry
youre doomed man. if they were previously published just release for clout. writing is a business and you have a product there is no demand for. what do you think you are gonna do with it?

>>19416809
Write more, practice more. But also hang out on /lit/ for tips and making sure you avoid meme writing.

>>19416990
>meme writing
What would that be?

>>19417036
Purple prose

>>19417036
anime writing
cringecore
my diary
/sffg/
schlock
litRPG

>>19416990
>But also hang out on /lit/ for tips and making sure you avoid meme writing.
But no one here writes?

Meme writing coming through. Stand aside pseud peasants you don't even know what fun is.

Chapter 57 released.
https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/40361/erased

But in all seriousness I hope your projects are coming together and you aren't letting yourself slack off too much

Is there any place authoritative I can privately contact for extremely specific MLA questions? I'm putting together an annotated bibliography using a lot of non-English and unconventional sources and the specifics on the preferred method of citation for some of these is bordering on guesswork on my end.

>>19417249
I don't agree with my diary. For a story to be honest it needs to be from the author's life. Of course that's doesn't mean you should splash all your anguish on the pages, but disguising them in archetypes and such.

>Can get about fifty pages into a story before hitting the wall.
>Can come up with pretty decent isolated scenes and characters, but struggle with plot and momentum.
>All ideas I have for plots are good but come out way too long, will be tossed immediately by agents and editors as a result.

Fuck anons. How do you keep writing more concise or come up with smaller and punchier narratives? I'm a wordy guy.

>>19417629
Gimme an example of what you’d consider a great idea for a story but are unable to tell in a concise manner.

>>19417429
>and you aren't letting yourself slack off too much
Why are you calling me out like this, I'm doing my best ok

You ever worry about a chapter's length relative to the others or you just let things be as it may?

>>19417746
I try to make chapters that have more reaction in it to have more words overall and less scenes so I can be more detailed. I'm concise with active chapters and use more scenes with fewer total words.

>realizing how much work i have to do
the entire thing needs to be completely rewritten for the fourth time. hype but also, holy fuck this is a labor of hercules. kind of want to cry.

If you were to publish, how do you get people to read your book before hand like book tokers?

>>19418359
beta readers?
sometimes in /wg/ someone drops a contact to volunteer as a beta reader, or you could google it and find people like redditers.

Has anyone ever published a "primer" book first, to get a small audience before they publish their real baby a few months later?
OR
Is it better to publish with your best foot forward and coast off that?

>>19418445
...does that say one thousand eight hundred sixty two books? is that unique books, or total sales of say a dozen books?

>>19418490
It's total sales.
Not my image, I just scrapped it. I'm thinking of how to better market books and what is best for profit.
My content doesn't change, but let's be honest, I'd prefer to write with such a reward in mind.

english is such a limiting, ugly, dogshit language. i wish i spoke french.

>>19418524
English is as ugly as you make it. There's such a huge lexicon to draw from.

is it enjoyable? I've found that's all I care about now.
it is my nano, will check in every so often to see if anons keep making it to the end lol
https://ghostbin.com/UXs93

>>19416463
Any good websites or videos on actually formatting a txt file for Amazon Kindle distribution?

Has anyone ever sold merch alongside their book? Like something related to something in their book?

>>19417429
It can take 6 months or even a whole year to hear back from publishers so it's okay for me slack off while I wait.

How the fuck do people write a consistent story over 50,000 words? I can only bring myself to write snippets of scenarios, and tend to lose focus and direction after 1k words.

I'm attempting to write a fantasy series that spans 6 books (2 of them are shorter than the others)
Is it presumptuous of me to write an additional smaller book before I can get one published?

>>19418808
Outlines are your friends. You neglect them, but they're still there for you, ready to give structure to your snippets once you swallow your pride and realize writing isn't about throwing shit at the wall but rather hard work.

Hey! It's me. (>>19400183) (>>19400293)
So, I didn't finish an entire chapter, in fact, I've wrote very little, but whatever, at least I wrote.
I tried to implement the other anon's idea, but it doesn't seem to have worked, but I wrote about a write though. Thanks to him anyway.
English is not my first language so I used google translate on most of the text (except for some grammatical errors of the translation).

Please critique! You can call me out if you notice grammatical errors too.

https://litter.catbox.moe/krr62g.pdf

>>19418815
Yes
Imagine you get all 6 finished, drop one, wait 3-6 months, drop another, etc until all 6 are done.
Imagine you publish this, realize the series isn't doing well and you've wasted time on an entire series instead of planting a bunch of seeds.

>>19418831
I'm more curious on if publishers are willing to review two books rather than just one.
I do have noveletta ideas that I plan on alternating in between the parts, I'm wondering if any of you have tried to get two seperate novels published at once.

Has anyone ever outweighed selling e-books verse putting your books into kindle unlimited to get slightly less money for just the sheer pages read while getting more eyes on the book?

>>19418827
>He goes to the front of the large French window on the twenty-fifth floor of his apartment
This implies that he owns either the entire apartment building or at the very least the first 25 floors. I assume you mean to say
>He goes to the front of the large French window on his twenty-fifth floor apartment
I would also avoid using the word "He" so much, especially at the start on each sentence. It starts to sound like a numbered list of action after a while.

>>19418808
clearly you have nothing you are trying to say.
>>19418789
>so it's okay for me slack off while I wait.
precisely the opposite

>>19418933
>precisely the opposite
B-but

dibles
thdebl
violencia

how did nano go for you today anin

>>19418887
>>He goes to the front of the large French window on the twenty-fifth floor of his apartment
>This implies that he owns either the entire apartment building or at the very least the first 25 floors. I assume you mean to say
>>He goes to the front of the large French window on his twenty-fifth floor apartment
Yep, that's what I meant to write. I didn't pay much attention to all the translated text, I read it and haven't notice that, perhaps because it makes sense if translated literally in my language, but I should've have to pay more attention 'cuz there's several grammatical differences in between languages.

>I would also avoid using the word "He" so much, especially at the start on each sentence. It starts to sound like a numbered list of action after a while.
Yeah, there's a lot of "He"s :p. I'll work on that too. What words could I use to substitute "He", I wonder.

Anyways, thanks for the feedback, I'm really happy for that :). Now I'm gonna sleep. Goodnight, everyone.

>>19419005
I woke up fully intended to write at the very least a sentence... and then I watched anime and played vidya instead.

I am lazy and not a hard worker and come with ideas that seem fun enough to me, but then the obvious plot holes come into play and I'm unable to put in the work to think of an acceptable explanation.

I wanted to write a story where in the mid-late 1800's, society is dominated buy a guild of mage's who have enjoyed a near monopoly on technological innovation. As time progresses, their monopoly is at risk as they hear reports of new mechanical innovations which exceed their powers. They use their influence and wealth to launch a propaganda campaign branding technological innovation as the work of the devil, and magic a gift of the divine. The protagonist would be an engineer working on something that he thought would better the lives of all and finds himself hated and scorned by the community he tried to help.

But then I start thinking about the implications of mages dominating innovation since the dawn of mankind, and realizing how different the 1800's would be, and how the plot doesn't hold any water and it all falls apart.

What should one do in this situation? Proceed anyway, or just write books for toddlers?

>>19419020
mission fail you'll get em next time
tomorrow is a new day
take it as if none of the other ones exist dood

>>19419024
I think at a certain point there's a requirement on the reader to suspend some disbelief. Yes, I agree that if a group of magical beings controlled innovation since time immemorial society would be a lot different, and who even knows if they would have the same concepts as God and the Devil.

That said, as long as a certain amount of worldbuilding is done upfront, and you establish why the way things are (in universe reasons) one would expect a reader to accept what is laid before them

>>19418724
Doesn't Kindle have it's own softwware you can download for free and it helps you out with that?

I need to find out myself. I've been publishing on Vella but I was going to compile my series for KDP.

I'm going to write a 50 page short story but idk where to start

>>19419089
No matter what I try to write, as soon as a female character pops up I end up spending the next page writing about her physique and how much the character wants to fuck her.

>>19419089
The fact that you start with page count is already a bad sign.

>>19419095
Write me a description of a flat brown girl with bare feet right now.

>>19419101
>flat
>brown

I'm afraid I have no experience writing a character of that description.

This is the last female character appearance I wrote. It was relevant to the story that she was hot, but I think it's pretty clear in my writing I'm a coomer

She was tall, slender, and gorgeous. Her long brown hair curled slightly and fell over shoulders covered by a thick fur coat. Beneath the coat he could make out a tight sparkling silver cocktail dress. Her long, smooth legs were barely covered by the dress and coat, and as she walked over he could hear the click clicking of her heels. As she got nearer, in the light he could make out the features of her face. Long faced, olive skinned, full lips.

>>19419089
For the love of God, write anything with a fucking moral lesson.
I'm tired of this meaningless faggotry.
Give me a story that rewards behavior, good or bad, and shits on other behavior. Do even a paragraph of it and post it here.
I'll tell you if it's worth shit.

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/295886/mechazoid/
Someone r8 my story. I've published only basically a short snippet of what I want the story to be (because first impressions are valuable to me and i don't want to waste anyones time)

>>19419129
“Don’t go too far – stay within earshot!” his Mum told him as she set up the parasol. The child nodded enthusiastically and took off in a sprint down the beach.

The child slowed his mad run to a slow jog as he quickly approached the water. His eyes scanned the shoreline, eager to find a choice shell to take home and show his Dad. He saw some small grey shells and scanned further to find something more impressive. A few meters down the shoreline, a shine caught his eye. He shuffled towards it; his feet now gently caressed by the tide. As he neared, he saw what looked like a golden tea pot. He eagerly bent over to pick it up. His fingers touched the surface of the object, and like the force of a magnet he felt himself being pulled towards the object. He tried to pull his hand back, but it was a futile struggle and before he knew it his hand had been pulled into the tiny spout. He gasped in fear, and in the next moment the spout had gobbled him up to his elbow, then his shoulder, and within the blink of an eye he felt himself tumbling down.

The tumbling sensation lasted only a moment, and he fell on his bum with a surprised “oomph!”. He sat upright, and saw before him an old man sat down in the same position, facing him.

“Well? Let’s hear it then. Tell me your wish” the man before him spat out. His arms were crossed above his bare chest. The child noted the man was naked except for his strange underwear-shorts. He reminded the child of an aged Tarzan. His long white hair spiraled chaotically down past his scrawny shoulders.

“Wish?” The child asked, wild eyed.

“Yes, wish.” The old man said sullenly, rolling his eyes. “I know you’ve seen Aladin, Child. Make your wish and make it quick, I don’t have all day.”

The child’s eyes were wide with a mixture of wonder, fear, and shock. He was silent for a moment before saying “I want for everyone in the world to be happy”.

“Including your bully?” the genie asked immediately.

“Yes” the child replied.

“Including killers?” the genie interrogated.

“Yes” the child said again.

“Hah!” the genie spat out. “So, you want your bully to find happiness in bullying you more, and killers to find happiness in killing more?”

“I want my bully to be happy so he doesn’t bully me anymore, and killers to be happy so they don’t kill anymore” the child replied.
The old man said nothing.

The child was about to speak once again when he felt the same pull as before when he touched the teapot, but this time jerking him up into the air. The yanking sensation lasted only a moment, and he felt himself fall on his bum with an “oomph!”. He immediately realized he was back on the beach. He stood up and dusted the sand off him with one hand. His other hand was clenched, and when he opened it he saw a small, beautiful, conch shell.

>>19419135
yikes

>>19419128
This is now a writing exercise using a hypothetical.
You are writing a shit story on Royal Road. I am your very generous patron, so generous that I make up over 80% of your 4 figure monthly income. If you don't give me a three paragraph description of a flat barefooted native girl you are going to be homeless.
Go.

>>19419148
>Responding with reddit buzzword
I'm not him but what's wrong with the story?

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1vlfoB2yFsE06qR7TsWDkRgo7TUbGXSjT87MYSZkqJrs/edit?usp=drivesdk

>>19419135
>The child noted the man was naked except for his strange underwear-shorts.
Sure you shouldn't be writing porn?
Also, this just felt clunky. Some places you exaggerate movements too much, and the moral lesson felt pretty gay. You wrote the child like some zen buddhist more than you did a naive and happy child.

>>19419178
The streets of City Earth were laden thoroughly with snow. Windows universally were frosted like a brick snowman wearing chilled glasses. Perpetual wind scattered swaths of ice into flying whirlpools that, when struck against a surface or even against itself, created a wall of relaxing noise such as soda fizzing newly opened. There were numerous imprints of various Winter footwear disjected by shivering passers-by. Storefronts illuminated the sidewalk intermittently with an orange glow whose fingers scarcely reached to the slushy street beyond—such was the frozen mist’s thickness. Office buildings loomed, their tops unseen save for windows lit overhead because they were like beacons reaching into the far frigid blackness up high, and to lay on one’s back against the refrigerated concrete below and look up there might give a sense of vertigo and make one believe that he or she would perilously fall vertically into the sky, into orbit, and suffer freezer burns beyond the atmosphere adrift.

Jackknife was a youth on his own. His white wife beater was reinforced by a sturdy leather bouncer’s jacket, black. Jeans, blue. His hands were protected in its pockets. They were both doubled up as he tried to suppress shaking against the blasts of hyperborean air that slayed. He eyeballed each alleyway he passed as his true destination approached: the electric train station. From this station, a passenger with sufficient funds could go anywhere across the planet, even over oceans, for rail-lines were erected to distant lands over the briny deep, resembling overpasses going on forever. The docking yard extended miles amid the continent’s shore, even past horizons, and everyday over a million citizens and vagrants commuted therein/therefrom. Jackknife was one of the vagrants. A film of white arctica shone sometimes on his black sideburns and hair glaciated into place by the reaction of petroleum jelly hair-gel and weather conditions permitting. He snarled at no one in particular, as he had a habit to do.

>>19419192
>Twitter

>>19419192
It was more meant to portray the kid doesn't know what a loincloth is.

Fair criticism

If the king of the world finally met his demise,
What expression do you think he'd wear?
I'm telling you now, your first guess is wrong.
Because there is something that separates you from him
Something
Terrible

Is the hero's journey a meme?

>>19419333
It's just a tool like many other things. It's by far the most compelling means of showing character development

>>19419333
Yes it's the literary equivalent of astrology

>>19419376
>It's by far the most compelling means of showing character development
>THE MOST
I disagree with you. Prove it to me.

I'm writing a short story about robot slaves who love their masters
How do you make sure that everyone understands that this is just a worldbuilding exercise and not real literature with a need to discuss morality or real philosophical issues? Besides the awful writing of course

>>19419906
Actually nvm I feel too bad writing this
I can't do it

>>19419906
Oh wait I'm going to make it so the robots have a programmed love of humanity but not necessarily individual humans/their masters

You lads know the best creative writing courses in the UK? Is it UEA or Oxford or some other shit?

>>19419906
make the robots look like dogs
dog ownership and slavery is practically the same thing, but dog ownership is acceptable behavior because dogs aren't human and they're also kind of cute.
there is also the added bonus that a robot dog would be able to communicate with its human in the case of an alien invasion

>>19416463
Might get blasted for this, but do you think that in anyway studying the specific ways that you can improve your writing (like with the listed resources) would cause you to lose your genuine touch. I'm really really enjoying the process of writing right now and I wouldn't want that to be tainted by having rules and tips about it be at the forefront of my head, it feels magical as it is.

>>19420025
i used to feel the same way but i've realised that knowing more about something is never a bad thing, and you won't lose anything but will actually gain a lot by understanding things like structure and how to construct characters. do you write just for yourself, or do you want a reader to have a good experience? would you rather listen to a song made by someone who doesn't know anything about music and are just strumming randomly on a guitar, or someone who actually knows how to handle their instrument?

>>19419174
Lol OP doesn't have it. Well well well. You tried, critic anon..

>>19420025
No I don't worry about that. Iron sharpens iron and talking with other writers is helpful. You can listen to other writers but still champion your own perspective and style. Rightfully divide good advice from mere style.

>>19420092
>>19420263
Thanks, I beleive you guys are right on this. Though I know some classically trained musicians, both pianists and a level ten in the conservatoire, who can barely improv or make their own music. But I guess they didn't have had that kind of creativity to begin with, and people who do can only benifit from learning the structure and theory.

6k words in and I have 6 footnotes with a Bible quote in them. One for every 1k words. I hope to keep it up.

>>19419906
>robot slaves
>robot
>slaves
>love

>>19419906
Write it with a lighthearted tone. Add some humor, make it cute and show the different ways a robot can love their master. You'll get your worldbuilding exercise and it'll be too wholesome to dig too deep into for the average reader.

I've been planning on writing a (high) fantasy story based on a dream of mine, where intelligent creatures live only underground in great and mystical caverns deep under the surface, illuminated by luminescent plants (kinda similar to Blackreach in Skyrim). I know stories based on dreams tend to turn out shit, but I'm writing it for myself and for practice.

But of course it begs the question, why do they live underground and not on the surface? I've come up with several reasons, which do you think offer the most in world building and interesting storytelling?
>maybe the surface is too cold
>maybe the surface is too warm
>maybe the surface is lethally radiated (I don't want a post-nuclear apocalypse setting, I want it to be pure fantasy)
>maybe there's great monsters who eat/kill anyone who comes to the surface
>maybe there's no breathable air in the surface, only underground due to vegetation
>maybe the surface is completely depleted from resources
>maybe the living conditions are simply better underground
>maybe there's a god who punishes anyone who dwells the surface
>maybe there's no surface, the entire universe is in ground?
>maybe a hostile civilization holds dominion over the surface
>maybe the surface is a religious/societal taboo, for reason or another
>maybe it's just simply too hard to get to the surface, because everyone lives so deep and/or there's great challenges in the way
>maybe all the intelligent creatures simply evolved to live underground
>maybe it's just never elaborated on and is a mystery to the reader (and possibly myself)

I actually have a grammar question for once. In that last sentence, would the correct be 'to', 'on' or 'for'?

I think I've figured out an unwritten secret to marketable storytelling.
>divide your characters into clear-cut, preferably named groups into which readers can sort themselves
>create a protagonist which acts as a member of one group but has sympathy for/connections to the other groups due to the events of the first act
>create an antagonist who appears to empathize only with his own group
I could write a long essay about examples of this and how it ties to the well-understood plotting rules of the books in the OP but I'll just trust you to figure the rest out.

>>19420710
the only solution is to ignore all those questions

>>19420722
these are not secrets, they are the most popular tropes of YA fiction

>>19420710
It really depends on what you want the story to be about assuming this question is important to the plot. If they live underground because the surface became uninhabitable, the story may focus more on how the surface became that way. If the creatures chose to live underground, the story may focus more on the creatures' culture and societal conflicts.

>>19420710
>I know stories based on dreams tend to turn out shit
Is this true?

>>19416793
6 complete, tons of incomplete

>>19420807
Certainly, but I haven't fully decided on the type of story it would be. Having legends of ancient heroes conquering the dangers of the surface sounds fun to write, but I fear would be too cliche and overdone. I haven't actually read that much high fantasy but feel like writing it.

>>19420853
I don't really know, I read someone in /lit/ say that but he might've just been talking out of his ass.

>>19420853
>>19420877
James Cameron made Terminator based off of a nightmare he had of a burning metal skeleton, it worked out fine for him.

>>19419906
Read a bit of Ray Kurzweil's take on robots. He believes post-singularity AI of robots and mostly non-biological humans will be reverent to biological humans and see themselves as their legacy. Unlike many other roboticists, authors and the like who are robot alarmist or transhumanists, I think Ray has a loving view of the future. I consider it a bit disingenuous especially given his response to potential abuse of AI. Still if you want to portray that harmonious relationship between robot retainers and humans rather than Asimov's stark and frustrating divide, I suggest you consider it.

>>19420711
I think both are acceptable, but "to" feels more natural with the verb "issue".

>>19419174
The rustle from behind the bushes revealed itself; a young girl of maroon skin, hugged by macaw feathers everywhere but her chest and stomach, came into the clearing my crew was settled in. Unlike us, she had no trouble permeating the thick vegetation of the rainforest, perhaps the bone knife on her hand was of great help. A basket hung from her shoulder, filled with fruits that glistened under what little sunlight crept from the crowns of trees. Her face had no cuts or scars like ours, unaffected by the sharp leaves of some of the denser areas we've traversed. She was marked, instead, with thick, black paint; most notable was that each cheek featured a spiral surrounded by dots, remniscent of the sun. The pitch-black, straight hair that fell to her shoulders had a lock adorned with two blue feathers, contrasting the reds of her necklace. I and my colleagues had a hard time averting our eyes from the budding breasts she had on display.
Back in training, we were advised not to engage with the natives, as they could turn hostile at any moment. But this encounter, the first of my career, couldn't be any less threatening, if anything, she held an inexplicable allure.


Not that anon, by the way. I made shit up as I went.

>>19420744
Sure, it's something that appears in the stuff that sells well, but nobody talks about them and advocates writing based around them, which is what I mean by "unwritten." Also it appears a lot in other stuff. I'd say Blood Meridian is successful because it follows the formula but maybe that's too controversial.

What’s the most romantic, passionate way to have a man ask a woman permission to kiss her just before he marches off to his death?

>>19421422
by not asking at all

>>19421430
Without consent it’s sexual assault. He’s supposed to be seen as heroic.

>>19421422
Basically >>19421430. If they love each other, she'll put up the nonverbal cues to show she wants to kiss. Maybe they both hesitate before going straight for the kiss.

>>19421440
and if he does ask, all the women reading will dry up like the sahara
how is anyone gonna press charges anyways? he'll be dead.

>>19421477
At that point i may as well have him rape her before he goes off to die.

Are the Harry Potter books considered well written? If they’re not, how come they did so well? Do you think they’re reboot the property at some point but make Potter and trans character in order to combat the author’s transphobia?

>>19421486
If you insist on them verbally communicating, have him tell her he wants to kiss her, rather than asking for a kiss.

>>19421486
Don't give her a choice. Be assertive. Have him tell her than he WILL kiss her.

>>19421497
It does enough things right to engage an audience.

>>19421531
>>19421519
You people are all sick rapists and I hope your mothers get murdered to death by packs of wild niggers.

>>19421543
You know women are such sick whores they get turned on by rape and have fantasies of that shit?

What's the best thing to use for text-to-speech?

>>19421497
A novel concept, fantasy and wizardry in a modern, familiar setting. There was nothing else like it. It came out at an opportune time and appealed to young and old alike. The literary merits were secondary.

It's not so fresh anymore, so a "reboot" wouldn't perform nearly as well.

me, to agents:
>i showed you my dick, answer me

Anyone else get writing inspiration almost solely during working out?
Feels great having an epiphany after crushing a set.

>>19422425
exercise is not part of the literary lifestyle

epic epoch
Awe inspiring
awesome
Enlightened mind
bygone time
Please buy my free flow modern poetry. I'll add pictures next to the poems too.

>>19422461
On the contrary

>>19422474
i'll take 20

>>19422488
15 americone dollars per poem. 38 for a signed one.

>>19422425
I get inspired doing chemistry at work, see something strange, or when I'm handling a bottle of liquid death. Colors change, gases sublime capillary-like crystals. Some things that ignite under atmospheric moisture or 5 ppm lethal toxic concentrations. That doesnt even scratch the surface. It's still safe but very sobering.

>>19416463
I have a question about pacing in regards to punctuation. As a child and young adult, when I read books, I was a speed reader. I would read 3-400 words per a minute and I would do so by brushing past the punctuation. I didn't do a full stop at periods and I barely stopped for commas and em dashes.
I did this because this rapid style of reading enabled me to better visualize the text I was reading within my mind.
But now I'm an aspiring writer, and I no feel for pacing. I'm not sure when I should use a comma, a period, or an em dash in terms of pacing. I understand how to use each grammatically speaking, but I have no idea how to balance them from a pacing perspective.
Any advice?

>>19422286
>Modern setting
Hogwarts is an essentially medieval setting through. HP only became popular because people aka twitter/tumblr/reddit normoloids and trannies love self-inserting in that shit. Why do you think HP fans are so brain dead?

>>19421138
You get to keep your home for now. Next month we'll escalate things to furry roleplay.

Three men in long dark brown coats approached, and no one could have possibly predicted what was about to happen. They walked in and started to dry themselves off and took their coats off. There they were attached; to the sides of their bodies polished and ready for the slaughter. The men had sheen black rifles that almost reached the floor. "Everyone on the ground! This is a stick up!" said one of the men. The women behind the counter screamed at the top of her lungs and people dropped to the floor in an instant. "No one gets hurts if you all comply!" said the second man with the grizzly beard. He shot twice into the air and small clouds of dust engulfed him. He pointed to his henchman "Get to work idiots!".

The two men in the back scrambled in the back trying to get the money into their bags. Pallets of money were stacked but there was too much to take with them. "What are we going to do?" said one of them, "I don't know, we'll take what we can" as he stuffed cash into his bag. Outside the head robber looked out the window and saw a sea of flashing lights and sirens that could be heard blocks away. "Shit" he said as he loaded a magazine into his rifle. "Sir! We've got them surrounded, what are our orders?" said one of the deputies. The police chief he was talking to was known for being corrupt but he could get the job done when necessary. The police chief took a sip of the liquor bottle he hid in his car, "Fuck, I don't care what people say I want them dead. Don't let them leave alive," he said wiping his lips. "Sir!" said the deputy then he ran towards the ammunition container.

Three shots came from the bank window and two officers went down. "Open fire!" yelled the chief. Inside the two henchman became frightened. "Why did you do that Jack?!" said one of them. "Oh, you thought we were going to get away?" said Jack as he laughed taking aim again. A wave of bullets hit the bank walls and glass was shattering from all angles. Jack unloaded his clip with the eyes of a madman hellbent on killing as many offices he could before dying. His two henchman dropped their guns and ran while stepping on hostages as they fled. "There! Fire!" said an officer outside spotting them run away and the robbers were gunned down.

Inside Jack was sweating with heart pumping out his chest the adrenaline was too much for him to handle. "There's no going back now. If I take one more step, it'll be the farthest from home I've ever been". Looking back Frodo asks "Come on Sam" as Sam takes a step. "Remember what Bilbo used to say, It's a dangerous business Frodo, going out your door. You step onto the road and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off too."

>>19420710
>maybe the sun is so strong that it cooks everything on the surface alive
^^ This one has both "realistic" and symbolic potential.

Newfag asf, wondering if there was anywhere I could share screenplays for peer review and shit. Kinda just wanna find out what I'm missing before I get into screenwriting classes again

>>19423529
publishers dont even accept screenwriting...

>>19423541
All good, they just haven't read my script yet

>>19422624
You probably absorbed the feeling of the punctuation without trying.

I like to slightly rephrase a sentence if it runs on too long and put a period in the middle there if it needs it. Sometimes too many commas mean a sentence has no strong definition.
People use the em dash to show when someone's speech is cut off suddenly. I like to use it in place of the semicolon - it just looks like a symbol for continuation to me.

Also it's good if you want to create an effect, like if someone is hearing things in a dream, passing in and out of consciousness, or in some kind of rushed busy situation with lots of poeple around.
Maybe you don't want it to be in quotes because it's confusing and unsettling, not clear, and you want to change the writing style for the dream to set it apart.
>no, don't do it - quickly, get him to a theatre -
>why did you come back - I won't forgive you - I hate her - he's losing blood -
or you could do it
>....no....don't do it....quickly....get him to a theatre...
>...why...why did you come back.....
With italics the dashes - can be dreamlike and hazy, similar to the dots....

Ultimately there is a flexibility there once you understand the basics. Some writers totally just throw the rules of punctuation out of the window and don't use any kind of quote marks at all, and do other weird shit.

'I like to have speech on separate lines, like this.'

So that it's always clear, and I only use single quotes. "Some people just have the speech with the rest of the text". But I think you can make more of an impact with separate lines. Also you have flexibility to imply someone is speaking without having always state - He said - or - She shouted in shock.
You can just say - Gordon paused as he opened the drawer.

'Did you shit in this drawer?'

'Yes.'

'...this is a lump of dog shit Harold. I can tell. I told you to shit in the drawer because the drawer needs to have human shit inside of it.'

And then you can go back to writing without always inserting the same - He said - She said - stuff. I fucking hate all of that.

Anyone else use Scapple? It's kinda handy.

This is the most I've ever written and it slowly feels like I need to reel it in a bit, even if I've only got several chapters left.

>>19423663
I sometimes have scrapple for breakfast

>>19423689
>nd it slowly feels like I need to reel it in a bit
Why's that?

>>19423717
I'm writing without much pacing in place, I'm hurtling headlong towards the ending but I haven't really given it ample padding, if that makes sense. Abrupt endings are fine if they're done well but this is my first Novel, not Novella.

>>19423689
This is it, if you write one more word it'll be the furthest you've ever gotten in your story.

>>19423722
Well then the 35k word is a decent skeleton. Consider it the notes and framework of your actual book.

I did something similar, with one I left alone a couple years ago. Now I'm going back over it and making it a real book.

https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/41979/a-hero-among-monsters/chapter/789571/chapter-fifteen-taking-inventory
Posted chapter 15 of A Hero Among Monsters. Just finished writing chapter 34.

https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/41979/a-hero-among-monsters/chapter/789571/chapter-fifteen-taking-inventory
I posted chapter 15 of A Hero Among Monsters and just finished the second draft of chapter 34.

>>19424189
>>19424240
You really write almost 20 chapters ahead? I can understand finishing a novel and then throwing it up on RR piecemeal, I can also understand going the true discovery writing route of throwing chapters up as you finish them, but this method just seems like the worst of both worlds. The only time I ever see this done is with Patreon bait but you don’t have one listed.
I’d love to hear your reasoning.

>>19424253
It’s just a timing thing. I wrote the book last year and was doing the second draft this year but then decided to post it as well. I’ve found the “delay” between re-drafting and the final spit-and-polish just before posting a chapter to be helpful, as several times I’ve been able to better integrate elements from later chapters into earlier ones.

>>19421497
>If they’re not, how come they did so well?

First one started with a massive media PR campaign launch. It got some hype. They kept doing it with every knew book. The media eventually started promoting it for free.

It's like an untalented boy band. No talent, all hype.

>>19417249
>cringecore
>litRPG
elaborate
cringecore is like f gardner?

litrpg sounds like what i used to write as a tween. lol

>>19417614
Fuck off Finnish Army autist

what do I do if I have a lot of neat ideas that I don't know what to do with and they're all so separate that it's impossible to put them together in a single story

should I just say fuck it and be an artist?

>>19424579
Write a collection of short stories you nincompoop

>>19424581
do people even take short story writers seriously though?

>>19424529
Movies also helped. Now every breathing retard goes on about which House they belong in like its the coolest thing ever.

Also how did JK Rowling get such good PR? Nepotism?

>>19424681
It's not that hard to figure out, kids liked the world. It was a good mix of fantasy with the familiar, much easier for a kid living in a shitty family and boring school to imagine themself as Harry rather than Frodo. As for the house thing, YA loves having factions. It could be personality type groups, or ship A vs ship B, or even some divisive character or decision. It gives them a sense of identity and it's an easy avenue for discussion, which is the lifeblood of any fandom. Rowling did it well and had some luck being in the right place at the right time.

>have 120k words, really tight fit, cut too much
>need to revise into 220k words (for a 2 part novel)
>everything needs to be rewritten
>need to re-do all the research so reading about 10 ~500 page academic texts and misc research
Yep. I'm giving myself until May.

How do I know if I am even good at writing?

I got 2 of my short stories on kindle, 1 is in englisch. New to all of this so I don't know what to expect.

I made it free, just to get a reaction and see what people think of it. Right now people are getting a copy, but I can't get a review or some rating.

Just be patient, or can I do something more?

Do you frown upon short stories?

The genre is horror/mystery.

>>19424917
Post it.

>>19424943
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09M1SC951

Here is the link. It's free for a week right now. Didn't want to post it before because I don't want to look like a beggar whore.

Just want to know what people think about it.

I am also a indie dev, so, maybe I should stick with what I can, but writing is really fun.

>>19424953
Also to add, the description is really vague, but since it's a mystery short story as best as I can do without spoiling the whole thing.

Haven't written since September when I finished my last big project. Trying to get back on the saddle but all I can think about is how I don't actually enjoy doing it and how it ultimately feels masturbatory and pointless because no one cares and there's no sense of accomplishment.
How do I overcome these things?

>>19418524
false, it's the best language left that humans still commonly speak
be glad you aren't speaking some fucking bug language like chinese that is just ugly to the ears or some flowery garbage like japanese where everything is implied or suggested and rarely is there an implicit statement

>>19416463
What do you think of killing games? Are they just cheap entertainment?

UK fags, what are the best /lit/ unis I can go to for creative writing? is UEA good?

>>19425468
>Uni for creative writing
Ngmi

>>19425505
I like the community and mentorship aspect of things. Plus I only gonna do it if it's fully funded

>>19425507
Well I suppose if it’s fully funded that’s another thing entirely.
I just cannot stand seeing all these new authors who have yet to put 15k words to paper seeing university as a necessary stepping stone only to end up as some debt slave writing desperate trash in an attempt to make interest payments.

>>19425302
>What do you think of killing games?
P U R E K I N O
>Are they just cheap entertainment?
no.

>>19425551
I'm kinda in a different position. I already have a good STEM job, making comfortable pay. the last few years I've worked my own short fiction and poetry and have even been published a couple places. I just thought a ma in creative writing would allow me the time and space to really delve deep into a couple personal projects while getting valuable feedback from workshops and profs and lectures.

do you still feel its a not a good idea? genuinely asking

>>19425645
Honestly the best thing you can do if you really want to explore those personal projects is to just keep working, build up a safety net and all the while you just keep reading and writing. Take a year off and start on your personal projects when you feel like you are ready.
Don’t feel like you need to buy your way into a writing circle. Find yourself a community of writers on Discord, or Reddit or Royal Road or whatever.
Another issue I found with university is that there is very little room for personal projects. I came in with an idea that I wanted to flesh out and get feedback on. The time to write it never came. Most of the writing you’ll be handing in consists of small 3-5k word prompt driven exercises that are probably going to be on the fly stories that carry very little weight to you. The most I wrote for a single story was 21k words and that was set up with an intentionally tight time limit where everyone just handed in first drafts of stream of consciousness nonsense.

>>19424953
How is it putting stuff on Amazon? Do they protect your work? Like let's say I copy paste your work and say it's mine, will thy take it down 4 u?

>>19425302
I think the premise of killing games is cliche, in the same way that zombie stories are cliche. People people that they are exploited by the upper class, that theyre expendable and the elite think its funny. It's a serious theme but perhaps not the best way to explore it. Certainly entertaining as far as genre fiction goes.

>>19425813
I know a few things from kindle and outside of kindle about this.

I am new to kindle, mind you.

1. You have to option to DRM protect your book when you are submitting it. Means, if you don't want others to post your book anywhere else.
I have this option turned off. Means, you can copy it and post it anywhere you want.
Generally this is the case with all content, as long as it's free and as long as you give credit to the original content creator.

If you want to take micky mouse and add it to your website, you can do so, as long as you give credit to the copyright holder and you make $0 with said website.

Except if stated otherwise by the content creator.

(learned that when working on a game)

2. When you create something and post it online, you already are the original creator and holder of the rights of your creation.

Let's say I draw a robot and post it on my website in 2019.
Then some studio takes this robot 1to1 and makes a cartoon without asking me first.

In court I can prove that I am the copyright holder simply by pointing to the website and submission date.

Same with steam games. Steam notes when you submitted the game. Everything after that is copyright infringement. The proof of the date is most important.


3. So if you want to take a story and post it on kindle the following might happen.

- A bot will scan trough it after a week and ban you.

- The original creator will find it and ask kindle to ban you.

If you post it elsewhere and write that said creation is yours. Then if the original creator finds you, you will get a cease and desist. If then not followed a lawsuit, which is rare, since most contact the website provider and ask them to terminate your website/ ban your account.


TLDR, don't worry, once its up you are safe, but don't send a copy to someone you don't trust before that

>>19425841
This info is mostly important for fan art or fanfic.

If you, let's say write a book in russian and post it on amazon as englisch, then the bots will ban you after some time.

Amazon does not offer russian. Many have tried to just put it on as englisch.

Apparently there are bots and they scan trough content.

All in all they will ban you and that's it. Nobody will bother with lawsuits. It only get dangerous if you made a ton of money with something that is not yours.

Is it really possible to write a book in 8 days?

>>19426430
Easy if it doesn't have to make any sense or be even remotely correct grammatically

>>19426430
Anything is possible with enough cocaine

>>19421272
Love triangle.

>>19420722
Whats the formula for nonfantasy?

>>19426430
it's possible to defecate 50k words onto a page in 8 days.

a novel worth reading is another story. and once again. nanowrimo should be abolished

>>19420722
Marketable and fucking boring. You might as well just write an anime about the power of friendship at that point.

>>19426746
Nta but the top YA books published within the last two years follow that formula so not everyone finds it boring

How many penises makes a party?

>>19424671
Who is Jorge Luis Borges?

How do you write degenerate scenes without going back to look at it and say "ew"?

>>19427330
i just don't
leave it to the fan artists
hopefully they don't get the wrong idea, you know

How the heck do I do this?

The Wolf Who Hunted the Moon

Beneath the trees and in the mud,
Between the hills where the cold wind blew,
The wolf did hunt before the morning dew.
‘Twas heaven’s light that awaited the blood.

From broken hunted hare it did flood.
One life snuffed for another who
Prowled alone, soon to hunger anew.
Its grey fur soiled, marked with blood.

Night by night the prey of the woods was culled,
By tooth and claw, a hare he slew.
Always, for his hunger to renew.
‘Twas heaven’s light that showed the blood.

The wolf sat alone amid the mud.
Beneath the moon, silver-blue,
A silent judge who
Watched grey fur wet with blood.

Wherever he went, it followed and judged.
Whatever life he snuffed, it knew.
A dreadful pair, those two.
For the wolf hated the hunger, the blood.

One night, under the moon’s shining flood,
From the wolf all prey flew
And more than hunger grew.
Anger swelled up, unquenched by blood.

With an empty belly, the wolf succumbed.
On that night, more than howls carried through.
From dirt to tree to sky he flew.
He bared fangs at that which had no blood.

Alas, the moon had only judged
That the wolf was a wolf true
And had bit more than it could chew.
In the heavens, there was only the wolf’s blood.

How do you make a plot interesting?

>>19427843
things should have and your character should have a reason to care about the things that happen

>>19427330
By desensitizing yourself to degenerate scenes. I think it’s a positive for a writer to be able to casually write so far outside of other peoples comfort zones so I’ve made an effort not to let those fears of offending influence me. I’ve written things that I honestly didn’t believe were that foul but ended up costing me friendships.

>>19417653
>still hasn't replied
Kek probably still typing it out

>>19426430
I've written 8k in one day before. I wrote almost 8k the next day before throwing the entire story away though.

>>19416463
Guys, got some ideas coming together for a fantasy world I've been writing. This world has been in the works for about 7 years. While I had some interesting ideas none really solidified or made any relevant plots.

Now I have a few things I really wanna pursue but I'm running into a few problems. There's a lot I want to explore in this world but I also don't wanna bloat it to the point it grows too big. I've whittled down the main POVs with full arcs to 5. I'm debating whether I should pursue 2 main characters per book with a few other povs to fill the reader in on what everyone in is doing or just 1 main character per book with a few other POVs sprinkled in. The story jtself in the. ext post

>>19428851
More than likely, the main story will focus on a nation wide conspiracy where the main characters are dragged into a secret order's mission. The secret order, however, is completely murdered with only one survivor. The survivor tells the main characters about the mission since they are the only ones he trusts and the only way the mission can be kept going. The only ones he trusts, however, are a small group of cousins who just happen to be close friends of the cousin's parents.

The mission is this: after decades of extensive research, the secret order had compiled a list of the most dangerous traitors in the land. Traitors who appear as benefactors but who plan to bring the nation's economy and well-being to ruin, as well as possibly commit crimes against humanity. With this list, the secret order would either capture or execute the traitors. The endgame of the series is that the MCs have to find a way to stop these traitors and along the way find out that the conspiracy grows worse and worse the more they dig up.

The characters have the choice of not doing anything at all or to seek help, however, they are strongly advised against this as nobody can be trusted. On top of that, if they do nothing for the mission, tens of thousands of lives will be lost. So the cousins all have to keep this secret as long as they can and try and solve this on their own. The interesting part for me is the fact that I have to find a way for these "peasants" to reach these high profile traitors and come out alive (if possible).

This is the simple version. Throughout all of this the cousins will be tempted to break their loyalty to each other, face much more powerful people and end up separated despite the fact they should stick together to complete such a dangerous mission. Also not including the magical and mythical elements. I'm also not looking to make some grimdark hopeless tale but something a lot more hopeful and kinda comedic(at least in some parts).

>>19428906
Glad to see you're enjoying your retirement, Mr. Trump.

>>19428218
Based.

>Unironically considering whether I should make my protagonist female and/or gay to give my novel a better shot at getting published

>>19429638
My main character is a redheaded polynesian in an italian fantasy setting

>>19429638
If you’re willing to make a mess of your story to pander to the 0.03% of the US population that would notice and care then imagine what kind of butchering you’ll do if the Chinese ever learn to read. You’ll make John Cena look like a physical manifestation of the Rape of Nanking.

book 1
>the main character wanted to prove himself
>using his inventiveness he filled a dire need in his community
>when his progress was undone and his community was threatened, he and a small group of friends went on a journey to save it

book 2
>the main character has already proved himself
>the community's needs fulfilled he's gotten bored and feels depressed
>when his progress is undone again and his community and friends scattered, each of the friends and their portion of the community go on a journey to reunited

/wg/, how do I keep the second book from being more depressing and less entertaining than the first?

Redpill me on dramatica

Any advice on writing from the perspective of juvenile characters VS older ones? Im trying to write a first person from the perspective of a senior in highschool

>>19430166
kill yourself shitdrinker

>>19430229
You’re probably closer to 17 than 40 so why is this so hard?

>You’re probably closer to 17 than 40 so why is this so hard?

Currently writing about a man giving a presentation at his church about Dr. Kellogg and the use of the practice of circumcision as a means of discouraging masturbation.
A character who had been masturbating is seething with guilt. When a young woman he finds attractive begins praising the strength and courage of someone who would willingly undergo a circumcision without anesthesia as an adult, he will volunteer for the operation to appease his conscience and to impress her.
This is a turning point for him.

I often dream of kaiju. Can they even work in book form?

>>19430958
What even is that dialogue? Christ reference and Gettysburg? I thought Western comics were pozzed.

>>19431114
Mignolaverse is not part of the Big 2 and their SJW agenda, it's stuff that came from the head of a Catholic artist.

>>19425747
University can help you meet people though. Discord feedback is honestly shit. RoyalRoad and Reddit is abysmal.

>>19419020
Why do you bother writing if all you consume is visual media?

Anyone have their own website where they post their writing?

>>19431177
I don't though I read too. Nothing wrong with consuming multiple forms of art.

>>19431228
That counts as publishing, so no. I just link my poetry and prose with hyperlinks to the journals I’m published by.

>>19431251
What’s the last book you read?

>>19431168
University helps you meet future debt slaves, most of whom never plan to write and are only there out of some obligation to their parents. I can understand looking for feedback from a professor if you manage to get into a nice university but you're not going to find yourself as a drinking buddy to the future greats of our generation just because you all fell for the same scam.
I'll also say, if the only way you can find a beta reader for your passion project is through the use of a six figure loan then you're probably not going to find much success.

Is it possible to write a good standalone fantasy novel? I don’t have the talent to write a series.

>>19431458
yea sure why not
im planning to write a standalone series of novels and maybe do some spinoffs

>>19431339
University helped me meet likeminded writers and many of them have paid off their debt already. Less than 30k is nothing, and that’s how much I spent over 4 years. If you’ve already been, it sounds like you’re bitter you didn’t do well or meet anyone.

>>19422425
When I'm running I have nothing to do but think about the world I've made.

is it better to allude to rape or to just call it rape and move on to describing the assailants?

I wrote some flash fiction today.

>>19432088
It's not rape unless the reader feels they've been violated by the throbbing member that is your prose. Ejaculate your graphic description into them.

>>19419148
God you faggots are the worst. What's the point in even coming to these fucking threads?

>Waah nobody writes here!
>Post it post it post it!
>Some anon finally shares some writing.
>Nothing but one word buzzwords like 'Yikes' or maybe the helpful criticism of 'it's shit'.

Nothing but stupid niggers here trying to tear people down for not producing perfect work on a first draft.

>>19432188
keep drafting until you make something good then

>>19432204
Suck my fat cock. The point is that nobody is going to post anything here or make anything worth a shit and share it here with the way you dumb niggers act.

>>19432221
I share my work and so do others. I've always noticed that nobody usually interacts with them though, at least for us that share actual finished chapters

>>19431228
I have a blog for it but it's basically a personal library of my own shit because I barely promote it besides occasionally posting that it has been updated to my tiny twitter following.
It's okay though, I largely write for myself.

How do I write a smart character when I know myself to be an absolute moron?

How do I put off the story idea that burst into my head so I can focus on the older story I was working on without feeling bad about neglecting the new idea?

>>19432531
Avoid writing them in first person perspective and don't go long on descriptions of their mannerisms and behaviours.

>>19430166
So...you wrote "Cloudy With A Chance Of Meatballs"?

>>19432188
It's good training for dealing with the general public?
If you can withstand, and even counter, the toxic vitriol being spewed here, you're ready to deal with anything!

>>19432537
Write both.
Don't get in the way of your creative flow.

>didn't do a single novel again this year
That does it. I'm going back to square one.
What should I keep in mind if I'm writing a short story?

>>19432319
I always took not getting a response as a positive interaction here. If I post a passage and get a couple joke replies that aren’t mean-spirited or get outright ignored, then I know I’ve done something right.
If people can tear something down here, they will, and that’s a good thing.

>>19431266
From the Two Rivers

>>19419175
>>19432188
It's a troll response

>>19432640
100% unironically true

>>19419175
It's good

>>19419135
Good flow of actions
Good flow of speech
A few sentences could be re worded to be a bit better, but it isn't bad. Just little things to point out. For example -
>His fingers touched the surface of the object, and like the force of a magnet he felt himself being pulled towards the object.
I'm thinking more -
>and with a strange force, like the pull of a magnet, he felt himself

It needs tightening up a bit but it is good, and from that excerpt I can see it being a readable 50 pages.

>>19432653
Think of a single plot thread and develop it. Read a short story every day and it will give good examples of how things get developed as well as the prose itself.

This morning I read "The Long Rain" by Ray Bradbury which is essentially a milieu story, which is exploring what happens when characters are put into an environment and how they get out of it. Four men are trying to get out of a never-ending Venusian rainstorm and under a Sun Dome. The main theme that comes from that journey is despair. There's just enough false hope and different kinds of despair attacking them, and makes for a good setup for the resolution.
Here it is if you'd like something to read:
https://ghostbin.com/3yBiE

>>19433349
>Read a short story every day
Where?

>>19433461
Project Gutenberg has a lot. I recommend choosing an author renowned for their short stories or has a style or genre you like and get a collection. These are some authors I've read in no particular order:
>Ray Brabdury, Philip K Dick, Flannery O'Connor, Ambrose Bierce, Eudora Welty, Kurt Vonnegut, Isaac Asimov, Anton Chekhov
Here's Chekhov: https://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/57333

Speaking of him, he's known for this literary principle: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chekhov%27s_gun

>sent 13 queries last week
>so far 1 rejection 12 no response
get off twitter and read your emails you lazy agents. if i took 3 months to respond to emails i would be fired.
doing everything in my power to procrastinate starting the next manuscript

>>19417102
The exact opposite actually. Every fag and their mother is writing monosyllabic subpar-Hemingway mudshit. If you want to write well and write something that will be relevant in the coming years, look to Victorian prose.

>>19433900
Who do you email?

>>19433944
If I have to read one more retard who cites Hemingway as an inspiration or role model to follow, I'll scream.

>>19416463
Is it possible to not kill anyone during a war?

What I mean is subduing enemy soldiers no lethally. Is that possible? Even with fantasy magic stuff like super powered soldiers and what not?

>>19434043
I didn't even get into Hemingway yet and I probably will never read him at this point.
I've heard the "adverbs are weak" argument and while I tend not to use adverbs in my first draft, some of my favorite authors use them often. There's a time to be concise and a time be descriptive. Using a simile or some other device is great but sometimes you just gotta adverb.

>>19434026
literary agents, anon. there are something like 600+ english-language agents working currently. depends what genre you're writing in and who you think would like your shit.
>>19434079
cold war, zoom zoom?

>>19416463
>>This Craft of Verse, Borges
Actually quite enjoying this
I don't know how "useful" it is but it's a nice read

>>19434134
Carlos duti cold war?

>>19428040
Fucking kek

/wg/, how does this premise sound?

>magic is pervasive in the universe, but billions of years ago the seed of an eldritch abomination fell to earth and took root
>needing a relatively stable environment to grow, this entity evolved to encase its host planet in an anti-magic field as part of its lifecycle
>it's in this environment, where matter is conserved and resources must be fought over that life on earth evolved
>the possibility of intelligent life was always a threat to it, so the entity censors the area outside its host planet to keep them from realizing its threat
>planet x, dark matter, the fermi paradox... astronomers spent decades trying to explain the apparent emptiness of the universe
>never did they imagine the secret was under their feet the whole time
>not that is until the thing began to hatch, when reality as we knew it started to break down

>>19434621
Your premise is irrelevant. As long as it does not directly violate a taboo that will prevent prospective publishers from giving it a shot, your premise can be anything. Don't ask about premises. Just work on your writing. If you write something interesting you will naturally be able to pitch it after the fact.

You haven't established anything important with your "premise". Jim Butcher, writer of pulpy schlock, wrote a successful fantasy series to prove this. He polled his readers on what the two worst possible premises he could use were. They said 'Pokemon' and 'the lost legion'. He then wrote Codex Alera, which was quite successful, on the basis of those two concepts.

>>19434638
when I say premise, this is for an overarching background plot and the endgame conflict for a series. This isn't even going to be hinted at until the end of the first book which already has a first draft written

>>19434621
If someone asked you what you thought of the premise, what would you say?

>>19434675
I would think it's a neat little detail to explain the whole "the magic comes back" trope and set up a final villain, but that's because I came up with it. I'm not an objective judge

>>19434638
Codex Alera is underrated

>>19434638
>you can write whatever you want, just have 6 full length novels published beforehand and carryover your rabid fan base

>>19434638
>>19434817

codex alera immediately diverged from the pokemon premise and never looked back.

>>19434918
IT really doesn't feel very pokemony at all. Supposedly they're bonded with spirits and call them to battle and shit but it reads purely as "I cast fireball"

>>19435015
Incidentally, when Tavi finally starts using magic isn't it before he meets Alera?

>>19435025
it is. Codex Alera is good but it's dogshit at the premise it was given. Ironically, I'm the guy who started this reply chain and my story actually does make an attempt at a better "pokemon but with adult storytelling" premise. I tuned some of it down because I thought it was cringey, but I plan to tune those elements back up now that the first draft is done

Got the urge to write some sissy smut.
Context: College student shaving himself before he starts crossdressing.

He’d never paid much attention to his asshole. He saw it wholly as just a biological necessity. Though in this moment, he felt the sudden, and instinctive, urge to investigate. He pushed his index finger down from his the base of his balls and across his taint, then lightly from one end of his ring to the other. He noticed the soft spongy contrast of skin as he gently rubbed back and forth. He also noticed that his cock began to swell and rise. He gave a light little tap on the top of his hole then rested the tip of his finger in place. He breathed deeply then bent a knuckle and lined up his hole. With just a little pressure he slowly slid the very tip of his finger into his tight virgin asshole, and thus turned his exit… into an entrance.

>>19435632
>He also noticed that his cock began to swell and rise.
Would be better without the filtering. State it as a fact.
Another thing, avoid the use of the word "He", especially at the start of a sentence. It comes off as just a list of actions after a while. Of the 9 sentences you have there, 7 start with the word "He".

>>19416883
I had a good time doing this too. I have a difficult time coming up with prompts for myself that I find interesting enough to write.

>>19416920
I've had this idea but it might be shit, and I don't write poetry to try it, so it's for /lit/izens instead.

Youtube algorithm favours short length videos (it's something to do with retention % I think). If you narrate your poems over some interesting images (like a video essay does) and maybe some light music in the back it could get an audience that way. It's pretty sharable in the right circles I think.

Obviously it doesn't have the prestige of being published, but if no where is publishing then may as well try it?

I want to do something similar with flash fiction, but I'm still pretty shit at writing and want a backlog of some good stuff before I start.

>>19435687
Hows this?

Nathan never paid much attention to his asshole. A biological necessity; everyone's got one for the same reason. Though in this moment, he felt the sudden, and instinctive, urge to investigate. He pushed his index finger down from the base of his balls and across his taint, then lightly from one end of his ring to the other. The soft spongy contrast of skin teased his senses as he gently rubbed back and forth. His cock began to swell and rise, and a new pleasure began to tingle inside him. After a couple light taps on the top of his hole, he then rested the tip of his finger in place. Pausing for a moment to gather his breath, he bent a knuckle and lined himself up. With just a little pressure he slowly slid the very tip of his finger into his tight virgin asshole, and thus turned his exit… into an entrance.

Is it okay to write a story even if you don't know what message you want to convey with it?

I have ideas for a weird esoteric surreal story but I'm not smart or wise enough to insert a message or subtext into it.

>>19435722
Much better.

>>19435724
Just throw some romance at it.

>>19435724
You're in luck anon, Death of the Author means it doesn't matter what YOU think your story is about!

>>19435730
There's a rape scene between a mentally retarded person and a deer. I guess it works

>>19435746
That's got the romance covered. Maybe you could throw a brother that dies in the end.

>>19435758
might work, main character is an angel though, I don't know if that's a thing with angels

>>19435770
How about his angel brother/bro does something like rip his own wings off and dies afterwards? Or gets his wings ripped off and falls to earth and dies.

>>19435770
It is, don't worry about it. Have you considered adding a dog that tries to warn people of an impending alien invasion, but is unable to do so on account of being a dog?

>>19435782
I don't know if aliens fit the theme of my story. What are some other invaders the dog might try to warn about?

>>19435789
Mole invasion.
He keeps digging holes to tell people about the danger below.

>>19435789
>>19435791
What if what's digging up isn't moles but buried giants, the Nephilim who were covered in mud and earth and water during Noah's flood but are finally reaching the surface again?

>>19435805
Yep. Sounds good. But I think the dog should believe that its a mole invasion. He thinks they're really big fucking moles, because the dog knows about moles, not scripture.

>>19435808
I like that. The book should have an early scene to establish this by having the dog catch and kill a normal mole.

>>19435810
That could be a feature scene. Like a proper battle. You could flesh it out like Gandalf v Balrog.

>>19435818
Do it from the viewpoint of the mole. It knows there's danger down below, but cannot understand what it is. As it emerges from the ground, it encounters the dog, and does battle for its life. A futile effort, and as the mole dies, it compares the futility of its own struggle against the dog to what would happen if the dog tried to resist what lies below.

I'm pretty new to writing and find it exhausting. It'll get easier with practice right?

>>19435886
It might become a habit eventually.

>>19435892
I've been doing some writing exercises every day, but it's mainly things like list making and free writing. When it comes to writing words for my actual story it's just draining. I think I'm not used to pushing my imagination.

>>19435886
your brain is a muscle. muscles require exercise. you arent going to run a marathon on your first day. simple as that.

>>19436012
Well, if it's of any help, I think forcing yourself write/trying too hard is not necessarily good when fiction is concerned. It's more of building a habit of writing what you would want to read. They don't have to be specific exercises or waiting to get to the computer either, pen and paper works too.

I've been writing short stories as they came to mind, without a coherent thematic thread to link them together. If I wanted to put them together in a compilation, would that be a problem?

progress
https://ghostbin.com/AIFhg

>>19430207
First I've heard about it but now I'm looking at it. I will still use the MICE quotient for now, but will take a look at it in the future if I think it might organize my story better. I like the idea behind how the number of Acts are determined by shifting between one of four types of ways the conflict is approached.
I'd expect more people talking about it youtube or something but there's pretty much nothing at all.

I just started writing a short story that starts with the MC waking up with amnesia.

>>19436456
ok make sure that she examines herself in the mirror next

>>19436478
>she
He. I'm writing serious literature here.
>mirror
It's not a mirror it's the window of a train that's reflecting his face because the train is driving through a dark tunnel

>>19436478
I prefer characters looking at their hands and fingers more. Also I like scenes that involve mirrors but the characters never look at them, yet the reader is shown what is within.

>>19416463
I need you to tell me if my idea is retarded or not

My characters powers are activated by killing themselves. Whether it be shooting themselves in the head, or slitting their throats. Is this retarded?

>>19436544
But anon, then your character will be dead and the story will be over.

>>19436554
I didn't explain it properly. They do die for a moment, but the wounds they inflicted during the activation are instantly healed if they're summoning is successful. It's sort of a gamble

They blink out for a split second before their spirit warrior comes out of their bullet wound. Their wounds magically heal during this.

>>19436577
It's like this movie

>>19436577
What's the point of a gamble like this? Your hero has to win every time or else the story is over, so there's no real tension. Stop playing anime vidya and read a fucking book.

>>19436610
>What's the point of a gamble like this? Your hero has to win every time or else the story is over, so there's no real tension.

Now that I think about it, yeah. I just thought up about this whole idea now. I'll pay it some more mind to see if there's anything worthwhile to take with this idea

>>19436456
I know it's a stupid idea but I just wrote 1k words in an hour.

>>19416463
How do you take inspiration from something without outright stealing the premise and story beats?

Could I get some feedback on my writing? This was a free-write:


A man walked down a road. Dirt stuck to the soles of his feat and the hot road burned them. In the shimmer of the horizon in front of him a bus stop formed, he walked to it. Sitting at the bus stop in the desert was a beautiful woman. The woman was wearing a sleeveless thwab. She was an emerald amongst the sand, dust, and metal of the bus stop.


Hello, the man said. The woman did not respond. The woman did not move. She looked on to the boundary between land and sky, but the man could not tell what she was looking at. Her lips rested against each other in a slight pout, a diamond of separation right in the centre of them revealed white teeth. Her brow was furrowed, and her hand sat upon it. The man could not tell if she was squinting from the sun, or if she was lost in thought. Hello, he repeated. The woman lowered her hand and turned to face the man. Do you see that tower? No, the man replied. The woman placed her hand above the man’s brow. How about now? Yes, now I can see. I’m lost in that tower. I’m there and I haven’t quite found my way out. She lowered her hand and sat on the hot metal of the bus stop bench.


The man could still see the tower in the distance, even without the help of the woman. The tower was wide and seemed to be around five stories tall. It was a smooth sandstone-coloured structure and featureless except for a set of steps that spiralled around and up the tower. At the top were battlements surrounding a flagpole with a straight and rigid flag. The man imagined what God sees as he looks down on this tower: an ammonite shell, waiting to be buried by the sand.


The man turned to the woman and picked her up. He put her in his pocket and found himself at the bottom of the tower. It was two, maybe three times larger than he had thought. The man was able to see a window in the tower, a narrow slit, but he could not see inside it as it was too high. From the slit to the ground there was a streak of blood, as it poured. It pooled on the ground, under where the man stood and left the sand wet. The man walked around the tower, leaving bloody footprints as he searched for a door, but he could not see one. He started to climb the steps. The blood on his feet did not dry and did not run out as he marked every step.


At the top of the tower the man looked towards the horizon and saw water in every direction. The sun felt more intense, as if he had travelled above the atmosphere. He could not see the bus stop. The woman was no longer in his pocket. He looked up towards the sun but the sky around the flag was dark. An orb of light radiated from the centre of the azure flag. The man took the flag from the pole and put it in his pocket.

>>19436691
Understand what specifics of the idea you liked and then just steal those.

“If I was there, I would have got him”, he said in a half excited, half angry tone of voice, standing there tall. He was shaking for some reason, he legitimately believed on an emotional level what he was saying. Perhaps because I had become too distracted to pay attention to anything, or that the chaos within my own mind or around me had become too much and too unorganized, I couldn’t give a damn anymore about what was happening, whether it was my decaying life around me or the mind wars on the telescreen. I inquired for him to continue on his tirade. Surprisingly, he pulled out a silver prop weapon, a strange thing for someone like him to posses, however it was obviously fake though he pretended it wasn't. “Yeah, I would have taken him down!”, he declared in a almost psychotic mix of happiness and frustration. He flipped through some photos on his holo screen, trying to find the location of his and the systems object of hatred, though it was obvious he was merely having a fantasy.
This would have ticked off most people, especially of my mindset, however it only made me more excited. Forbidden love. I knew he would recoil in disgust at all the times and thoughts I held in my psyche, however I could not care less. What was the name for this strange feeling, grabbing towards your opposite despite it all?
I sat next to him and put my right arm around his shoulder. Surprisingly, he did not moved and remained busy. It felt so good to finally have my arm around him. I decided to go further, and I put my left hand to his face and faced him, caressing his skin. I had taken the leap and crossed into the fantastical realm. “Perces, I love you”, I said simply staring into his small eyes. His small lips quivered, and his eyes looked dear. “Do you love me too?”, I asked as he remained still. “Yeah!”, he said. I was overjoyed and hugged him. “So you understand why I got all those things for you!”, I said smiling. Than I began kissing his cheeks. I didn’t think this would ever come true, but nothing was truer than the love I felt from him. Though his joy was more subtle, it was obviously immense. I never expected such things from him.
For a moment in a bizarre twist I turned into a purple ant eater, and he into an orange cat. I did not know why but it seemed like it had happened before, and I nuzzled him. Though after a moment, this transformation became the source of frustration, as I could not see his beautiful face. Luckily it faded off and we both returned.
I left the room, and asked to take a picture with him. I was gonna send it to one of my comrades. But as I raised the phone and looked at the camera, I woke up disappointed. At least my dreams were getting stranger.

>>19436762
Honestly the writing here seems really clumsy. Things like "he said in a half excited, half angry tone of voice, standing there tall" seem like you're just listing things this person is, rather than describing them.

>I inquired for him to continue on his triade.
I don't think inquired is the word you think it is. You can inquire about something so that he'll continue on his triade, maybe that's what you mean?

>Perhaps because I had... ...mind wars on the telescreen
This is a very long sentence that just comes out of nowhere. It doesn't flow very well and gets pretty confusing. Split it up.

> a almost
Here's an example of what I've found all over the place. Small errors that are just very sloppy.

>Obviously fake
>Obvious he was merely having a fantasy
There's a lot of things that we are told are obvious to the main character. Describe why they are obvious. How does your narrator know the gun is fake?

>I knew he would recoil in disgust at all the times and thoughts I held in my psyche.
What do you mean by times you hold in your psyche?

>Put my right arm around his shoulder.
Right arm is not detail we need. It can be jarring if I've been imaging them as sitting/standing the opposite way. Since you haven't said anywhere else what way round they're standing you should just stick to "I put my arm around his shoulder."

>Surprisingly, he did not moved
Again, you need to do at least a little bit of proof reading.

I'm half way through here and honestly, I'm just going to stop. If you can't be bothered to proof read your work then I can't be bothered to critique any more. I'm sorry if this seems harsh to you, but you need this kind of feedback right now.

>>19436544
...isn't that the premise of re:zero?
i really wish /sffg/ babies would kts

Is writing prose supposed to feel formulaic? It all feels like the same sludge of "subject, verb, complement." Maybe I'm too scared of going flowery with it? That, or English really is repetitive.

I'm >>19421138

>>19437235
english is one of the least repetitive languages

>>19436875
Lol it put little thought into it, I just had a bizzare dream and wrote it down.

>>19437235
>>19437335
english has no actual rules but it's also a hideous dogshit language

>>19436544
So.. persona 3?

>>19437449
I blame the French. When I write I try to avoid using words derived from the romance languages.

>>19437459
That's in the filename, even.

>>19437467
french is superior in all regards to engl*sh
imagine how pleasant it would be to write in a beautiful language like french. curse my parents for birthing me as an angloid.

>>19437501
don't lie to me like that. french people speak as if they always have their mouths full.

>>19437514
while angloids just spit at you in a garbled mutt language

>>19437708
and that's the french's fault

How would one go about describing a fictional animal/race without leaning too hard on their real-world counterpart?
I have a race of ape-humans and I'm not sure how to go about depicting them

>>19437782
biological terms (good luck). Go to wookiepedia and read how they describe aliens for an intro

>>19438007
>>19438007
>>19438007

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