/lit/ - Literature

>>17431029
fuck those were fun days. they were just as fun as when the teacher just let go to library to pick up our next book for those AR points

>>17431029
whatever comes with the best toy nigga

>>17431029
Marketing propaganda to children as entertainment is as grave a sin as usury or sedition

>>17431029
Captain Underpants + The Incredibles GBA game is what I remember getting in the 3rd grade.

>>17431029
Guinness Book of World records and cheat code book

*immediately beeline to BradyGames's Cheat Code Explosion and write down all the cheat codes I can find for Ratchet & Clank or whatever PS2 game I'm reading at the moment on the piece of paper my teacher gave me for the purpose of writing down which books I want*

>>17431029
Diary of a Wimpy Kid and scented markers

>>17431067
>whatever PS2 game I'm reading at the moment

>>17431029
How to Draw Dragon Ball Z: With Super Sayen 1, 2, and 3

>>17431029
The first book I ever bought at one of these things was an illustrated version of "A Midsummer Night's Dream". Whoever thought that was a good idea needs slapped, I couldn't understand shit as a 7 year old.

>>17431082
Sorry, I've been on /lit/ for too long that I forgot what the verb associated with video games is. I obviously meant playing.

>>17431047
The only problem I have with scholastic is underestimating how well kids can read and in a good society the books should be free
But come on anon it’s children’s books, sure there is lots of propaganda aimed at kids but the majority of children’s authors are well meaning people trying to help develop reading skill and become a decent person.

Super Mario merch and, failing that, books about monsters.

>>17431029
Guinness Book of World Records, Ripley's Believe it Or Not, some science fiction/adventure novel, or a cool illustrated nonfiction book about knights or something

>>17431047
i thought about this too and i wonder if scholastic book fairs is an american-only thing. I feel like only in the United States could a school week dedicated to draining little kids's wallets could be a thing.

>>17431107
The majority of children book authors would probably tell the children to go to the library. The issue I have and I'm sure the other anon you responded to has is the publisher.

>>17431029
Nothing because I am poor

>>17431029
>clear the way, early STEMmer passing through
Poster was a banger gotta say. Damn I remember some good smells from those scholastic fairs.....illustrated periodic table indexes—and the citric acid grains from those kits

>>17431125
We have scholastic in Australia too, I agree with other posters that they vastly underestimated how good kids are at reading and basically preyed on parents who think that books = smart

Go home empty handed and search for pornography in the woods

>>17431221
Winner, winner

puttin grandma's lunch money to good use

>>17431221
congratulations, you just made every teacher think you were going to grow up and become a school shooter

>>17431249
there was a waiting list at my school to borrow this book

>>17431249
what are you on about? history teachers love talking to kids about arms and armors and siege weapons. what kind of lame ass school did you go to?

>>17431212
I still have the Periodic Tables one :)

>>17431029
Man those were the days. Childhood innocence, friendships, coming home to watch the TV, reading Great Illustrated Classics books... I am very grateful for my childhood.

>>17431029
Take me back

>>17431221
based proto-kommando

I still can't believe that Burgers indoctrinate their children with these garbage Milton Friedman approved pamphlets disguised as children stories. There is a whole series of them.

>tfw always too poor for these
>tfw all the other kids didn't even read the books they bought, because they didn't like reading and just liked buying stuff and having time off class
I think the only other time that school taught me to be this blackpilled was when classmates volunteered to go to the funeral of a classmate's father, when they had never talked to the classmate. They would prefer to crash a stranger's funeral rather than have classes that morning.

>>17431866
The teacher would have her own wish list and if you didn't know what books to buy, you'd buy the wish list books and teacher would put the books on the communal book shelf

>>17431884
In my school if you didn't have money you didn't get to go to the display room.

>>17431125
They had scholastic book fairs at my school in Mumbai.

>>17431890
Based.

>>17431029

>>17431112
Same. I loved to read those every year.

>>17431047
Yeah Attack of the Vampire Weenies, Big Nate, Captain Underpants, and Diary of a Wimpy Kid were all loaded with propaganda

Shonen Jump

>>17431047
dont forget to dilate anon! :)

>>17431029
America's dumbest criminals

>>17431029
Magic tree house dawg

>>17431029
Nothing. My parents never gave me any money

>>17432839
I have the collection, I absolutely loved going to the library and getting a new book of C&H every week.

>>17431029
Nabbing as many of these as I feasibly can before that one girl in my class makes a beeline for them and when we get back to class, sitting underneath one of the long tables in my sleeping bag and waiting for lunch, which was always Little Caesar's pizza on Scholastic Book Fair Day.

Did anyone else's school hold book fair days on "read-in" days? You were supposed to bring books from home, blankets, pillows, sleeping bags, etc, and you could read until it was your class' turn to head to the book fair, then after you'd get your stuff, you could go back to class and read what you bought.

>>17431044
Nigga I forgot about AR. What was the point of those tests anyway?

>>17431029
Animorphs, and it's fucking weird that one company is allowed to hollow out a week of the school year so that they can shill books to children.

>>17431125
Did it in the Philippines but only the cushy private schools.

>Scholastic
I don't think children should be reading Thomas Aquinas

>>17431221
This was my favourite

>>17431029

unironically imagine the smell
those were the best days

>>17431029
Ignoring school closures, do they still do these? If so, I imagine that whatever they sell has to do with 1,000 different ways to masturbate, or explaining why white kids should only play with transgender/black kids. I think the last one I remember was '04-'05? Good times.

I never liked having the school pressure me into buying shit.

>>17431029
Goosebumps and Deltora Quest, my nigga.

>>17435256
this plus lately ive really been wondering what they were injecting us with periodically

>>17431112
>Guinness Book of World Records
this used to be my favorite christmas gift every year. i loved going through it looking at who still held their records from the previous year and who got beat.

Just re-downloaded the entire series onto my kindle. This shit made me howl! Even included cheap little dragon jewelry necklaces to appeal to girls but just made my little faggot ass all the happier.

>>17431112
I had my first wank to girls aloud in that book kek

>>17434842
>pushing Little Caesar's "pizza" on poor innocent schoolchildren
Amerikwa must be destroyed

Deltora quest hmmmm

>>17431029
There was always manga at these and well, young children should not be allowed to see that.

>>17431029
Calvin & Hobbes anthology + Bionicle books + Harry Potter

>>17434854
Cant say for certain, i assume as a way to track student progress for distributing grant money.

>>17431029
Deltora Quest box set with the free necklace
And The Fire Within

>>17431221
Damn I loved those books.
Almost as much as the cool books about knights.
Firearms were pretty awesome, but metal plate was better.

>>17431029
Deltora Quest

>>17431029
Coloring books. Those were the best.

I preferred book swap day. In the week leading up to it, you turned in as many books as you wanted and got a ticket for each one. Then on book swap day the cafeteria was turned into a giant book smorgasbord, all the lunch tables pushed together and just stuffed with thousands of books. 1 ticket = 1 book.

>>17431419
>t. welfare neet

deltora quest or zombie bums from uranus. i hope the other kids dont get them all first.

One of those books that show you how to make different paper airplanes

So many anons saying Deltora Quest that I feel like I missed out not ever reading it. Worth checking out as an adult?

>>17438749
Not really, it's children's literature. If you have kids you could do a lot worse than getting them to read it though.

>>17431866
yea I know that feel. I think I got like 2 books in my entire time in school, I believe one was "city of the beasts" and the other one was one about dragons or something

>>17431029
Captain Motherfucking Underpants. I drew a picture of Captain Underpants on my AP Literature answer sheet in highschool and ended up with a 4

>>17431029
A book on game cheat codes

>>17431029
>>17431047
>>17431240
>>17431299
>>17435191
>>17435256
>>17438718
>>17439048
JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
>JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
>JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
>JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
>JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED
>JEW PROPAGANDA DETECTED

THIS IS A CODE JEW
I REPEAT - A CODE JEW - BLACK MALE WHITE FEMALE PAIRING
THIS IS A CODE JEW

>>17438749
I feel like I missed out too. Admittedly part of the reason why I never got into it was because they never had the first book available in the library

Did anyone else get free books? I don't remember if they were actually free or I just thought they were, but I got one of the Narnia books once, but it wasn't the first one so I didn't read it.

>>17431064

>>17434257
How?

don't remember getting anything in particular. It was exciting having a shop pop up in middle of the school for the day but I never got to take much money to school.. even after promotions my parents still only let me have £2 for lunch on a friday for like 15 years. by the end I could only afford a single sausage. not even memeing

but my parents were big readers who read to me when i was little and my family were regularly in and out of waterstones

>>17431029
One time i bought this expensive as fuck book, and then jacked off from its pictures for many months

Back then I didnt read, only bought a book because it had a cheap plastic dragon necklace i liked
lmmao

>>17431047
this

>>17434257
I accept your concession.

>>17431029
I only got to look at the catalog and think how cool the books and games and stuff must be, I never got to buy any.

>>17431047
Only some of it was propaganda. A lot of it was harmless. They would sell anything regardless

>>17431029
I could never buy anything because my parents never gave me money for them. I’d just wander around and watch other kids buy things. I would be upset then but its kind of funny in retrospect.

>>17440994
There are three families in this image. One straight couple and two unaccompanied dads from different families. There's no reason to pretend they're fags

>>17440994
>his husband
>your dads

>>17441042
>while Old Harold, his husband
Anon this is a book for 2nd graders wtf can you not read that?

>>17441042
are you illiterate?

my dad didn't believe in books so he used to give me a picture mag (porn) and a few of his winne blues (cigs) whenever the book faire came around, those were the times.

Need for Speed Hot Pursuit 2

>>17431029
Why, the new Jigsaw Jones of course

>>17431029
>>17431245
Goosebumps. Anything about pirates.

>>17435517
Kek, I remember one of those Guinness books had a picture of Heidi Klimt in the worlds most expensive bikini or something. Blew our fourth grade minds, we’d keep going to that page during free time when someone got it from the library.

>>17440472
I own this book. Surprised it would be at a scholastic fair. I mean, nudity aside, its an anatomy book. Even though the book is pretty barebones as far as anatomy is concerned, its still really technical for most kids.

>>17440994
>>17439131
Why do the jews target the kids? How evil can they get?

>>17431047
>nnnnnooooooo there's a brown person in this story book!

>>17431221
mm based
>>17431249
My elementary school librarian lent me books about guns from his personal library.

>>17431029
>be me
>12yo middle school library assistant
>I'm the only kid who volunteered to work in the library, so naturally while all the other faggots were in band or computer science I just got to read all day
>over the course of 3 years I memorized the exact location of almost every category of books
>had the titty books memorized by heart
>there was a bunch of lewd manga the old librarian had bought, because she thought they were "graphic novels"
>get first dibs on uncensored big boobs
>naturally the niggers found out
>a month later my waifu would be pimped out, drawn on, with the the pages sticking together
>kids were always taking out the mangas and drawing books I had been jerking off to a few days earlier
>always looked them dead in the eye
>"so you like manga huh?"
>it always put a grin on my face seeing these kids sweat and blush
>spent most of my time reading fantasy novels for two hours with almost no one around
>10 years later and it's still the comfiest job I ever had
>>17435498
this

>>17439131
lmfao

>>17441622
you're like the librarian in Eco's aedificium but for titty manga

>>17441872
>be me, malachi
>40yo library assistant
>I was the only monk who volunteered to work in the library, so naturally, while all the other faggots were illuminating or having homosex, I just got to read all day
>over the years I memorized the exact location of almost every single book
>had the works of comedy memorized by heart
>there was a bunch of aristotle the old librarian kept in here, because he thought they were "dangerous"
>get first dibs on uncensored laughs
>naturally the franciscans found out
>a month later my books would be pimped out, studied, and secularized
>monks came up to me asking for the lost works I had been keeping guard over months ago
>always looked them dead in the eye
>"talk to the abbot"
>it always put a grin on my face seeing them storm off frustrated
>spent most of my time reading for days with almost no one around
>5 centuries later and it's still the comfiest job I ever had
literally me

deltora fucking quest!

>>17440117
He was being sarcastic, anon.

>>17431029
>I'll take one copy of the current years world record book and a lego sticker book please

>>17431029
my sis and I were living with our dad who was on welfare, so I never got pocket money for that stuff. even school pictures I never got

>>17431064
My nigga

>>17431047
Yes, anon. I'm pretty sure schoolkids are perfectly capable of understanding the works of Vonnegut or Borges.

>>17431029
The hello kitty ones, of course

>>17431029

>>17431029
Comically large pencil or gtfo nerd

>>17431029
That one which comes with a dead beetle preserved in a plastic cube.

>>17431029
Dinosaur encyclopedia

>>17443238
My teacher took mine that I bought with my money and put it up high in the classroom so I couldn't reach it. I also didn't have any other pencils and she wouldn't give me one so I had to go round asking the other kids.

>>17443779
that whore
that dog
if i were in that position i'd be plotting all day
i'd be thinking about the tearing and peeling of flesh to come
the breaking of bones, the dripping of marrow
the clotted blood and clumps of hair
the fragments and smears of what once was human
the detectives entering the classroom and puking at the stench, the chaos, the horror
oh, and i would have my revenge
it wouldn't be just the fantasy of an impotent child
it would be INEVITABLE

>>17443986
I got expelled from school for kicking her head if it's any consolation. She was sitting on the floor talking to the class when I came back from the toilet and my retard impulse brain took over.

>>17444015
based
i'm sure she now also has a retard brain
that is, if you kicked her in the right spot, which i'm sure you did

>>17431221
The Eyewitness books were pretty great in general.

>>17438634
We only ever had one of those at my school. I got a bunch of weird old anime magazines which I think I still have somewhere and an Alvin Schwartz book on tall tales. Good shit.

>>17434854
Idk, I remember getting free pizza hut for doing it

>>17444342
Bruh getting that tiny ass pizza for free was epic

>>17442811
>BONEr

i once got this book about this chick's uncle who would turn into skeleton at night and fucking eat humans alive

ngl kinda freaked me out a little bit

>>17431182
i know that feel

>>17441421
As far as I remember it was not so technical, just naked old and young dudes or chicks sitting in chairs and doing ballet positions. Playboys and "sexy" stuff didnt excite me, but boy oh boy those girls being paid to pose for a book with blank staring faces made me rock hard

>>17444731
Damn that sounds neaf

>>17431029
Patrician choice

>>17441622
>>17441990

>>17431029
Big ass pointer finger and then me and my friends would hit each other with them and pretend we were picking our noses

>>17431221
GOD

And the show!

>>17444827
I have to reread this fucking immediately what a throwback