/lit/ - Literature

Penelope, my love

They say that you should love yourself before you invite others to love you back, but I need them to show me how to love myself.

Only 1 day until September. We've officially spent more than half the year cooped up in our houses. Think about that.

>>16243885
where do you live? are you in a state of perma-quarantine?

IMAGINE:
>elfs and orcs exist in our world
>they come from certain countries
>thus the races are often discussed in /int/
>elven women are known for being cute
>long-ear fewer
>elven men are bugmen
>orc men are stronger and and have bigger average penis size than other races
>BOC, ORCED
>human females are taken by orcs and human males lust after young looking elves

>>16244023
Can't decide whether this is pol's nightmare or wet dream.

It occurred to me how everybody saying "2020 sucks! Fuck 2020!" is a crude rationalization mechanism. "2020 worst year ever!" A year is an abstraction of time. It's a concept that exists only in people's heads. It has no tangible reality. Trying to pin all the bad stuff that's happening on a year makes it seem like a fluke, a byproduct of a curse. It fails to relate it to the general unraveling of things that has been happening for some time. I find myself even fancying that magical the +1 of 2021 will somehow wipe the slate clean, realign the stars. A new year, a new lease on life. This superstitious belief that the current year is cursed, or has any causal role to play in itself whatsoever and is not merely correlational, is a handy way to extrude and externalize troubles and uncertainties that are happening and will continue to happen regardless of what imaginary four digit figure we associate it with.

>>16244023
Asian women are objectively more attractive than white women. And no one likes black women

>>16244023
>human males lust after young looking elves
Based

>>16244101
This
After 20 years we will look back on 2020 and think:
"2020... Now those were the times... 2040 is so shit"

In the morning I lay in bed, trying to think of a way to get out of the same routine that I've had for many months. I wait there and try to think of a way to change things, but I can't seem to do it. It escapes me and I have no choice but to live this day over again, with some slightly different news occupying the headlines.

>>16243873
I want to play sudoku

>>16244101
Fuck 2016 (or was it 2017?) wasn't even that long ago. It makes you wonder if they're in denial about our civilization in decay, or if they really think it's just bad luck.

Each time I see a little girl,
of five, or six, or seven
I can't resist the joyous erge,
to smile and say
Thank Heaven for little girls,
For little girls,
get bigger everyday,
Thank Heaven for litte girls,
they grow up,
in the most delightful way,
those little eyes so helpless and appealing,
one day will flash,
and send you through the celing,
Thank Heaven for little girls,
thank heaven for them all,
no matter where,
no matter who,
without them what would,
little boys do.
Thank Heaven,
Thank Heaven,
Thank Heaven,
for little girls

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HmnYnYX4soI

>>16244111
Gooks are ugly

The Redditor
The redditor is a peculiar creature; he swims in his atheist fantasies of skepticism and thinking with his own brain, bit ultimately he believes everything his prophets Hitchens and Dawkins tell him without any doubt.
He boasts about being unique while being part of a massive hivemind of reddit. He says that he's woke but his mind is asleep. On top of his head is an antenna; he is remotely controlled. Is the reason for redditor behaviour the MKultra remote-control experiments or the estrogen in tap water?
The redditor dreams about 'the old reddit' despite never having experienced it. He complanis about reddit being toxic without realising that vomplaining about something being toxic is, in fact, toxic.
The redditor sees no dreams; he encounters nothing of worth during his day (browsing reddit) so his brain don't have anything to process. He believes that soon his techno-messiah Elon Musk will allow him to fill his sleep devoid of any dreams with Google Advertisements and, of course, reddit, eith the help of the latest mark of the beast, Neuralink brain implants.
The redditor is a man of ambivalence.

>>16243873
the long road of degeneracy and sexual perversion is incredibly complex . One would normally imagine the progression like that of an iceberg, but this assumption is incorrect. It is more akin to Dante's Inferno as imagined by M. C. Escher. You begin in purgatorio alongside simple passions such as sex in the missionary position under the covers with the lights off. However as time marches onward you may, find yourself pushing deeper, exploring the intimidating mess of stairs and doorways. Soon you will become lost, running through this hellish landscape of fetishistic oddities: whips and leather, fur and rubber, h*nd h*lding. Any attempts to turn back only drag you deeper into the pit. Your eventual resting place, a small niche filled with pool toys and incomprehensible sentient tar leaves you questioning how the hell you ended up here, and why the hell you have an erection.

>>16243873
fuck pedos. may they die of painful, terminal diseases

>>16244339
>with the lights off
Gay shit for pussy bitch virgins

>>16243873
If Comics are among the saddest of us all, what might Bureaucrats be?

>>16244347
i also hope little girls fuck pedos.

>>16244318
I understand why mayo whores seethe, but I'm still trying to figure out why you virgins do.

>>16244298
The guy who wrote this song must have balls the size of watermelons.

>>16243873
>BLM/SJW chaos
>Election chaos
>Looming threat of Global Warming, AI, etc.

I am sincerely glad to live in this timeline. Win or lose, at least our civilization is in the middle of some exciting action! It's good to live in interesting times.

>have important application and interview deadline in 2 weeks
>???
>suddenly the novel i left half-written on the backburner reasserts itself and demands completion
not now, go away. i have to read like 6+ books just for background research to refresh everything. fuck

down with the Man
oh wait, I'm not a fucking joke
up goes Man, up goes all
up above the rabble and the filth
and beyond the moon and to the stars
to put the stakes of Man in unhospitable places

let us build a great tower towards the sky
and for as high as we can build, let us then make it ten feet lower
to pay pious tribute
unto Heaven

I can't believe I have to say this, but if you picnic on the side of a warzone, giddy to watch all the murder and mayhem, it is no one's fault but your own if you get hit with a cannon ball.

What type of perverse, sociopathic bastard watches a war with popcorn in hand? What type of innocent is that?

>cause carnage for months on end
>lol u aren't going to do anything incel chuds just stay at home and seethe
>get obliterated by a kid
>NOOOOOOOOOOOOO THIS ISN'T FAIR YOU CAN'T JUST FIGHT BACK
what sort of retardation is this?

i am cuddling with a cat and he is so fluffy and soft. i love him. he purrs a lot. he really likes to be brushed and we are going to play with a yarn ball later tonight. i am so happy to be around my friend the cat.

>>16245078
One more time for the idiots in the back: if you have no business fighting in a war, stay away from the warzone. Stay away. No one can you are innocent on a battlefield. No one can tell you are a neutral, sadistic observer, and no one should care otherwise. Stay away, you sick, disgusting morons.

I'll be 28 in two weeks and i have absolutely nothing. Absolutely nothing. Why was i destined to be talentless loser all this time?

I wish I could stop jerking off. I wish I could be happy. I wish I had a family like a normal person. Holidays are awkward when people don’t know how to ask about my personal life. I just talk about work or my brother instead.

>>16245133
>months
Years, honestly.

>>16243883
what do you do if you sincerely struggle to love yourself or others

I don't know if I can be happy in the modern world. Work is becomingly increasingly precarious and abstract, the institution of family is dying alongside any sense of community and to top it off there's no religion to cope with either. So what are you supposed to do when everything that made life meaningful in the past is being destroyed? Well at least we have material prosperity, right? Except standards of living are dropping with each generation and the elites are importing masses of cheap labour to suppress wages. Imagine the suicide rates when millennials and zoomers start turning 50 with no career, no house, no partner, no children and no friends.

>>16245154
I wish I could be comfortable around people the same way I am around cats.
A beckon and patience is enough to earn trust. The only hoops to jump through to maintain friendship is occasional treats. Stray cats are more friendly than strangers.
I wish I could stand physical contact with other people, and the panic attacks were less frequent. Cats can sleep on my lap for hours.

>>16243873
on nofap day 3 and my head is fogging out I have class two days from now and I don't know how Im going to get away with my inept state of mind without getting some negative self esteem.

>>16245751
I'm on day 2 or 3 without sugar. Everything is painfully boring and I have a mild headache

>>16245713
Kill me.
Kill me.
Kill me.

The end of the world will be sometime between September and December 2046. Peace out

>>16244773
"may you have interesting times" is an insult of the highest calibre in some cultures

>>16244655
cope roastie

I finished watching Korra today, and even though I had lots of problems with its ideological takes but it still made me feel something, or maybe it made me stop feeling. That hole you feel after finish a long book or show, the gap. The visceral slap back into reality as escapism fades away and the only reality left is ones of billboards and gas station McDonald’s. The repetition of “is this all there is” reverberates in my mind, as if there is no escape from the monotony of regular life, and there is no validity to the great man theory. Floating in an ocean of false nostalgia for an unreal place at an unreal time with unreal people. Anything to hold on to some bit of meaning or belonging or satisfaction, like trying to hold onto sand passing through my fist. I’m in a daze, disassociated from the disassociation, left only to rot in the mud of my material surroundings.

I don't think that Korra was actually very good thematically, but my being upset at the show made me become very engaged with the series. The continuation of AtlA, a fleshed out world, a variety of characters that have more than paper thin depth, the animation and style. There were some nice things. But I also hated it. I just feel empty. I think it was escapism at its absolute purest. It was so unlike the material world. I think that's what's getting at me.

I'm looking through my book shelves and trying to think of something to read that would fill this void again, and I don't think any of these books will get me off the same way. All the meme books I've bought based on /lit/ charts seem to all be grounded in the real world, and I really just don't like the real world right now.

wrote erotica story mockup this morning. has potential to go longer series. it's actually really hot and female-oriented, sort of like twilight vibes but for adults, and not mormon. what should i do with it? had an erotic dream last night about it, pretty much just woke up and wrote it all down.

>>16246128
Write your own story.
>but I'm a shit writer!1!!!
Can't shit anything out worse than Korra.

My mind is clear. I just got done with busting a nut.

I frequently fantasize about being a successful author and having my books made into films. I know I'll never be successful as my writing sucks and I'm a total coward/afraid of rejection. It's fun to dream, though.

>>16243885
I feel (again) like I'm gonna be alone forever. Most relationships I get into or almost get into I get out of because the girl has more experience than I do. Just recently I decided to look past that only to find out she was also assaulted and I can't deal with that level of trauma or be comfortable being intimate with her, this is like the fourth time this has happened. I also recently was dumped for the second time. These are all online but I tried in-person meetups near me and I massively massively lack the confidence and charisma to ever ask anyone out in person, being close over text and voice and then meeting up is a much more foolproof setup even though it hasn't worked yet. I can already hardly get over the relationships I've lost online, I don't think I could get over being rejected IRL.

>>16244381
the most bored

At the end of every day I get good work done lately is a deep sadness that is so lonely and crushing and when I reach out to people it becomes humiliating

>>16246461
>Most relationships I get into or almost get into I get out of because the girl has more experience than I do
Can wholly relate. It's rough, because when you're a guy, no girl's gonna fall behind to help you catch up. Late bloomers don't get the courtesy of being on equal footing with potential partners. They don't get that courtesy that was afforded to everyone who developed normally. We just have to fend for ourselves, levitate via sheer force of will alone out of the hole that circumstances have left us in.
A word of advice, though: you really, really should change your attitude towards rejection. What you have to do is this -- you have to decide to base your self-worth on being the kind of person who is willing to take risks, even seemingly ridiculous ones, instead of basing it on the outcome of those risks. It's hard, but you have to muster up the ability to say: "If I try, if I ask out a girl in person, if I go the difficult route -- then no matter what happens, I am a stronger person than someone who passively stumbles through life." You should probably look up Teddy Roosevelt's "Man in the Arena" speech; it gets this point across far better than I can.
Good luck, anon.

At times I feel myself striding across the known world on vast stilts of my own insight, as if I could at any moment peer down at any narrow corner of the earth and it’s secrets would yield to me. Languages and cultures, machines and minerals, animals and insects and everything in between could be understood by me in all their glory and vulgarity. I could consume them all and internalize not just the laws governing their actions and results of their existence, but also their beauty and their most subtle tremblings in the web of time and space.
And other times I feel myself scrambling in the darkness, sifting soil with overfilled hands, holding fragments of knowledge to the meager starlight and assigning them to my own sick vanity. Facts and figures, excerpts and analysis, lies and myths all apart of a scheme grander than any man’s comprehension. Building a scarecrow of knowledge to frighten away my own intellectual insecurities. Fragments of language devoid of fluency, facts ripped from the tree of context, motherless theories blundering unsupervised in my cramped mind. Pneumonic tricks to conjure instant math.
And other times I take a bunch of Benadryl and trip ungodly balls. I’m talking about begging the sink to give me water. Sometimes I piss my pants staring at the toilet and sometimes I piss in the drawer of my nightstand. Watching TV in the reflection of my bedroom window and trying to rewind the curtains. Answering phone calls from the refrigerator with my shoe. My grandfather’s face on the mailman’s body. Every time I trip on Benadryl I say “this sucks I’m never doing it again” but then the flat spiral of time brings me 180 degrees back to the medicine cabinet.

I'm so tired of it all. I feel consumed everyday, brought down by this unseen force.
I'm tired of fighting, I'm tired of hurting, I'm tired of creating tomorrows armies, I'm tired of watching the fragile joys fall to the mindless masses of baselessness and rationless emotion, I'm tired of division, of self segregation, of tribalism. I'm just tired.
All that's left in this world is misguided anger. All that's left is thoughtless hate. Sometimes it's hard to take, and sometimes I feel myself succumb to it.

>>16246946
Stop using Twitter. Hell, stop using 4chan. You don't have to be here. You don't have to know about the latest controversy of the week.

>>16244023
Asian = Elves
Blacks = Orcs
Whites = Humans

Claudia mi putita favorita, te amo.

Deseo arduamente estar de nuevo entre tus piernas y sentir mi verga estrujada por ese culito hermoso que has esculpido por años en el gimnasio. Si no fueses tan puta me casaría contigo, pero te has comido de más de 20 cabrones o más en lo que va del año, cómo coño puedes cojer tanto en plena pandemia...

Claudia mi putita hermosa, te amo.

>>16246307
This is why I started writing. Game of Thrones Season 8 pissed me off.

>>16247060
I know the world beautiful, I know it's worth being a part of, but sometimes I just can't fight back against it. And it's not just the US, it's the war crimes in China, the countless wars that continue. The constant killing of one another. Sometimes I just get hit with this wave of disdain for it all and it's hard to recover from it. I will, and I appreciate the response, but it's just how I'm feeling right now.

A huge aspect of maturity is learning to separate your attitude from your mood. Feeling shitty or elated is mood, and seems more or less biological, you can influence it but you can't totally control it. Attitude is how you relate to others and express yourself, and it's something you're consciously responsible for. I have endless respect for people who can feel like total shit internally, without whining or attacking others because of it. Seems like the socially healthy way to be.

Zhuangzi talks about it like this: when you're disturbed internally, close the door so you don't project it out; when the outer world is disturbing, close the door so it doesn't affect you internally.

>>16247060
dude, i used to think it was dopamine addiction but then some boomer on /vr/ of all places blew my mind that u can have cortisol addiction and it's stronger than dopamine, i was like yes, that's it! it's not the dopamine of some soichud giving u a (you), its the stress of feeling like civilization is collapsing, when really everything is comfy as hell

>>16247137
that is currently being called "emotional intelligence" and there doesn't seem to be any more around than regular intelligence

>>16244133
We must destroy capitalism

>>16244655
Trads who worship racIal purity.
She’s nice. Chinese?

>>16247184
yeah because we know working in agricultural commune growing soibeans gives people so much variety in life compared to having a job

>>16247130
What I'm saying is that it's not worth being a part of the world if it's causing you this much pain. Or at least, you should pick and choose which parts of the world you want to be a part of.
Either way, your anguish is justifiable. No one human should have to bear the sins of the world. It's only after the advent of mass media that such an action went from being considered a mark of divinity to a baseline expectation.
Don't feel guilty. Take a break from being plugged in. There's selflessness and then there's suicide. No one will fault you for it, or at least, no one truly moral.

>>16244133
We must destroy capitalism

>>16244655
Trads who worship racial purity.
She’s nice. Chinese?

>>16247196
if we destroy capitalism, you'll still have no friends

>>16247195
Ya, you're right. I just need to concentrate on other shit.

>>16247194
That doesn’t make any sense. Are you delirious with rage or something?

>>16246946

>>16247127
Same here, albeit with a different target of hatred. Point and laugh all you want, but as far as "fun" fiction goes, Homestuck was in a league of its own until it shat itself halfway through and never recovered. I don't know of any other stories meant to entertain that juggle the scope and complexity of the first half of Homestuck with its level of humor and character writing.

>>16247163
Civilisation is collapsing though.

>>16247301
>Civili
When was there a civilization?

>>16247163
>>16247301
>Civili
When was there a civilization?

>>16247163
We’re heading into a depression and the climate is still unraveling. This isn’t comfy.
(But I remain Epicurean over it)

>>16247301
if capitalism didn't collapse in 2008, it sure isn't going to collapse now

>>16246307
I’ e only ever written realistic and grounded fiction about the life I have lived. Degenerates, lawyers, and music.

I’m not sure where I’d even start to truly encapsulate the feeing of complete escapism.

>>16247350
It collapsed then and it’s collapsing again. The long recession barely ended and now we have a depression and no Rooseveltian hero coming to apply more of that Keynesian ointment. The US will go further into poverty and chaos. Yes, of course, capitalism can be propped up over and over until it kills us all. Great.

You and me together
Through the days and nights
I don't worry 'cause
Everything's gonna be alright
People keep talking, they can say what they like
But all I know is everything's gonna be alright

And no one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I'm feeling
No one, no one, no one
Can get in the way of what I feel for you, you, you
Can get in the way of what I feel for you

>>16247588
idk about u but my retirement account is at an all time high

>>16247611
>I don’t care about you. I’ve been sufficiently bought off with crumbs.

>>16243885
i've been hiking sucks to live in urban hellscapes

I was 18 years old and my sister just turned 13. That was the day when it happened. I was walking through my room naked around six in the afternoon. I forgot to call my bank trying to find my routing number for the checking account I just opened. Anyway, the day before I went to Chipoltle with my grandpa; well, I wanted to get a burrito but my grandpa ordered me a platter with rice and the assortment of other stuff. I was glad he was paying for it, but man, I just wanted to get a burrito. So when I got to his place I went to the bathroom and got naked. Just naked standing in there. I could hear him turn on the TV and it sounded like it was the news. I don't even watch the news so I don't know what's happening anymore. Anything could be happening in the world and I wouldn't know about. That's how I got into the mess with my sister the next day. Just thinking about what happened sends chills down my spine. Anyway, I was naked in there thinking about what I was going to do. Then I got dress and went home. A tornado killed a bunch of people nearby. I've never seen a tornado in real life, thankfully. To get back to topic, my sister didn't see it coming. I was only 18 at the time, you know? Our dang monkey brains aren't even fully developed at 18. But that's life I guess.

So, who's gonna write the Great Pandemic-Riot Novel?

>>16247679
dude i've walked 165 miles this month and i live in a thoroughly urban environment

>>16247688
they're not all bad

>>16246432
I know your feel, Anon

I dont know what to do with my life.

I hope no more people get hurt. It's not even a civil war, it's retards going out to street riots and daring eachother to escalate until someone mentally unbalanced finally does something. I bet the rate of true mental illness is way higher among the remaining rioters than in the general population because all the mentally well people have sensed the eerie vibe and gone home. I wonder what the ratio of brainwashed ideologues to people looking for an excuse to hurt someone even is at this point. 1:1?

>>16246432
Write screenplays, anon.

Both stare at each other right on top of that crumbled battlefield, panting, she wielded her huge mighty sword, while he was using a puny, almost broken, sword. A crazed lunatic versus a lonely man. They knew one would come out victorious and the other one dead.
The woman lunged towards him, while himself braced for the tremendous impact. Their weapons collide, with the sword cracking even further. She grinned menancingly, knowing the victory was hers.
"You knew from the very beginning you'd never win again me on my lair!" she pushed further her huge weapon "And once I'm done with you, nothing will stop me to destroy everything!"
"You know that's not what he..."
"SHUT UP! You don't know a thing about him! He sacrificed himself to save this miserable kingdom! And ended completely forgotten through history!" the man's weapon broke, throwing him off balance on the ground. She prepared one last strike with her sword "If we won't make history being the good guys, I'LL DO IT SLAUGHTERING EVERYTHING!" She swung the sword down, but the man rolled sideways, grabbing a piece of his shattered sword and jumping right on her chest, stabbing it.
"You became nothing more than a lunatic, Gitzi..."
She stumbled backwards after the hit, almost losing her balance. But with one last breath, she ran towards that man, grabbing him by his face and plunging her sword through his stomach.
"If I go down, I'm taking you with me, Grunt!" She was already coughing some blood, before loosening up her grip from that sword and both fall on their knees, she was putting her hand over that deep wound on her chest. "Ha... Ha... Hahaha!"
She smiled ear to ear, but her eyes said otherwise. Tears fell from her face and she was sobbing during her laugh. The man called Grunt, luckily somehow, was in a better shape than Gitzi, and just stood up, scared of his own death.
"But why..? Why don't I... feel better... with this? Defeating you... would give me... peace. Then... why I don't feel... at peace?"
"Your rage... won't bring them back, Gitzi..." the old man dared to speak, instead of keeping his energy.
She sobbed harder as her smile completely disappeared.
"My loyal commanders... my dear Audrey... my little Midy... I'm sorry..."
The leader started coughing up more blood in the middle of her sobs, until she had a moment when she looked up at the orange sky. Her face was completely smeared with blood, tears and dirt from the battle. She was still showing great sadness, until her energy was completely drained. Her hands stopped covering her huge wound and she were with half-open, lifeless, eyes. The body slowly falls backwards, without any reaction.
"It is a shame it... ended like this... I hope you finally... found your... peace..." the old man falls backwards, closing his eyes afterwards.
.
Sorry for bad English tho, it isn't my first language.

Disappointed that the mods deleted the subahibi thread. The more time I spend on this site the more I realize it's not an acceptable form of social interaction, but a synthetic substitute that keeps weak people trapped in and prevents them from making the real world connections they really ought to. I mean it is painfully stupid to have your only means of social interaction dictated like this. It doesn't work. When I am older, I should look back and think, "Wow what a fucking idiot, what was I doing there, why didn't I make any real friends?". And the answer is weakness. It's not fun anymore. I wish things were different

>>16244023
did you watch that one will smith movie?

>>16243873
Even if we can kill all 38 of them we won't be able to get their children, which could lead to this same problem occuring again in 20-30 years. If we go for the politicians and not the journalists we will make real change but we won't prove to the journalists that they and their families can also be touched. We're going to have to split up and trust none of us are killed before the final shootout.

>>16243873
Я ycтaл и пoдyныл.

>>16243873
I had a dream that I and a (dream) friend was asked by Tony Stark to help open an orgy sex club. Rabbit fur was discussed (Steve Rogers did not like the Rabbit fur idea).
And I said something like "Sex? What's better than having someone sexy read your favorite book out loud to you?" And then I realized it was embarrassing and Tony Stark looked at me like I was weird, but I fucking meant it, and I still do.
Laying naked on a bunch of rabbit fur while a sexy woman reads your favorite book to you? Sounds pretty fucking amazing to me.

I've been a mute my whole life. I just realized that other people's memories of each other include their words and interactions. I'm like flat water and other people are bubbling with past memories and conversations. My memories are in contrast mostly self referenced emotions. Which may lead to my antisocial continuation and also social people from keeping away. But it also makes me more empathic. Like reading a book makes you more emphatic. When people socialize, their emotional investment is less than when they invest in themselves or family. So in social situation, they can move within that gradient of emotional range (this is stranger, this is acquaintance, this is family, this is me). Each with distinct emotional categories. I don't have this. I love my family but I'm also perpetually in the middle of arguments because it's hard to pick side because I heavily sympathize with both sides. Which goes unappreciated because people don't want that much empathy from you. They want something so that their emotions are comforted and taken care of, or at least unbothered.

>>16248413
>My memories are in contrast mostly self referenced emotions.
Our memories might include speech, but that's just because we interact with our words too. That doesn't give our memories more depth, just another facet.
Everyone's memories are mostly self-involved. How we react to words, more than the words themselves. We're always the center of our own lives.

>>16248431

We may be talking past one another. I don't disagree with what you said but I was thinking more of when you're walking up to somebody. The correlated recollection between each of you depends on your last impression of them. For me, when I see someone they're mostly flat. They're just a generic human to me but to me the generic human is complicated and full of history and someone that could be interesting. But people don't feel comfortable walking around like this. They rather approach things (and have people approach them) with certain acceptable, respectable manners plus introduce topical themes "appropriately". Appropriate is the opposite of creativity. No such thing as appropriate creativity, just appropriate appropriation.
Add to this that my mannerisms and facial expression/demeanor is near psychotic and my voice is a Lovecraftanian shrill. I work on it and I'm grateful for the strangers around me that show patience. I'm getting better and maturing. I think I have a maturity issue.

I wish i could fully embrace vidya like i did when i was young and just become that fat, balding, smelly, neckbeard loser but without any regrets. But somehow it dosen't feel possible.

>>16248480
>when I see someone they're mostly flat. They're just a generic human to me but to me the generic human is complicated and full of history and someone that could be interesting.
Of course, I don't know you or the people you interact with, but I think maybe you're worrying about something that is very normal. Maybe this will help:
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dunbar%27s_number

I myself collect personal items from complete strangers (if I can find them) books full of notes, pictures, even a birth certificate, exactly because they don't feel real to me.

>I'm getting better and maturing. I think I have a maturity issue
I wouldn't know, but the fact that you recognize that and are actively working on it is something you can be proud of.

>>16248505
>But somehow it dosen't feel possible.
to be completely devoid of dignity is a mental illness. enviable in a society where there's no fucking point, and the only other option is to be enslaved by people who make more money in a day than we make all year, but still a mental illness.

>>16245816
wdym "no sugar"? 99% of products have sugar even if you don't suspect it. Are you on a no-candy diet?

>>16246128
I wish the authors would just continue the series with a prologue to all the previous avatars or something. atla was great, korra was meh, and the live-action movie will be dogshit.
why are they not doing it already? there's huge demand for it.

>>16243873
Was at a small house party/gathering last week. A girl there mentioned how "men's health" is important and all the associated normie rhetoric. Literally not even five minutes later she was joking how she wouldn't know what to do if a guy started crying in front of her.

>>16249023
Sorry anon.
Male mental health is important, though. It's just that are biases are incredibly ingrained, by everyone, not just men.

>>16243883
love ya

>>16249023

Imagine someone having to learn to walk again. They picture it and know how it feels like but their legs are limp. Our society idealizes actual equality but their power to exercise is limp. Typical neoliberal egotistical commoner in America.

>>16243873
I'm not happy right now. I'm having a lot of really bad intrusive thoughts. I feel isolated. I don't respect myself. I'm going to try and fix it soon, but until then, I'm just... stuck like this.

>>16247196
Looks Korean to me

I dont have the motivation to do anythign productive so I just spend most of my time in elaborate fantasies of working and being succesful, so that's how i live

>>16243873
I passed out at a party and spent hours cursing my dad out on the toilet floor drunk. fuck. my. life.

>>16249235
Lol

>>16249235
that is, indeed, lol

>>16248909
Sugar in the range of 1-2% is fine, and basically unavoidable. I mean sugar in the sense of both junk food with sugar (usu. 5g+ per serving) and fruits with natural sugar. I'm doing it because I've failed time and again to moderate my sugar intake, so I've decided cold turkey will just be easiest. It is not truly 'no sugar', but a very small amount of it won't satisfy the craving or impact one negatively, so it works out in the end.

>>16246946
Dude just get offline. I deleted twitter and now my housemate tries to update me on the latest scandals and he sounds so retarded I can't believe I was ever even slightly plugged into that bullshit. You don't have to read the news either. You know how most ordinary people are generally happy? It's because they don't obsessively follow current affairs. They dip in occasionally or pick it up through osmosis and they spend the rest of their time enjoying life with those around them.

>>16243873
Bring it like Brownshirts, 1934

Curb stomp, pull out a GUN

I may be Hitler, but I'm still not trump

>>16245816
Cutting sugar out of my life was one of the best decisions I made. Its really not that hard once you adjust your fridge and pantry to reflect your new diet. If you only keep healthy food in the house then you will begin to eat it because you have no option. Then you'll get used to it and sugary things will naturally begin to taste a bit gross to you. Stick with it brother.

>>16243873
I realized a while ago that I have never answered a question on topic. It's like I understand everything slightly left. Absolutely everything. For example, if someone asked me "what is the healthiest fruit?" I'd say something like "My favorite fruit is a pear."
And since I've realized it, I haven't been able to change it. There's just something skewed in my brain.

>>16249268
how about just, like, answering the question

>>16249268
Where do you live anon?

Does twitter not work for anyone else right now?

>>16246461
>>16246622
I can also heavily relate, all my relationships are online but even then the extend of it is just "friends who flirt" Im not sure what you mean by more experienced but i just found out this girl ive been talking to for a month likes "chaotic casual sex" and has slept with 3 guys so far all at 19, And here i am a 20 year old virgin, idk why but it feels like a turn off even if she admits she would be down to sleep with me and teach me the ropes if i ever went to visit lol. I guess i shouldnt be surprised as I met her on tinder and set my location to eastern europe. It seems like my life is going to be a cycle if talking to random women for a week to a month online then just ghosting them when i find out they are thots. Idk about you guys but my idea of fun is reading with some coffee or staying inside to play games while most girls love clubs and partying, ill do shrooms once every 2 years or so but just finding someone even remotely similar to my personality is fairly difficult online already and the lack of confidence to meet people in real life probably doesnt help.

>>16247685
Me, I'm almost done

>>16243873
made way too much scrambled eggs

>>16249280
I don't do it on purpose, genius. It just fucking happens.
>>16249284
Germany, but I used to live in the states.

>>16247685
>mfw I was writing a post-apocalyptic/pandemic novel before corona, and now no one will believe me.

>>16249303
uh-oh

>>16249033
Could you expand on these biases?
>>16249054
I broadly agree. No one actually wants equality. People feel internally disgusted by what they perceive as weak. But we like lying to ourselves so we outwardly say we aren't disgusted by that weakness. The dissonance in the West is quite remarkable.

I just wanted to write a pirate adventure. Why does everything i touch turn into faggotry.

I had not the heart to let poor Jakobo be thrown overboard, although there could be no doubt about his guilt. In the middle of the night, while the crew was lying in their hammocks below deck, recovering from the work of the day, Jakobo had sneaked into the captain's cabin to see me, with intentions that, in the eyes of most sailors, were even more criminal and blasphemous than the coldest assassination. He must have taken advantage of my deep sleep, for when I awoke, I found my arms bound, my mouth gagged, and my lower body exposed in the most shameful manner. Just as I began to understand my situation, I felt a pressing discomfort in my posterior region.

>>16249268
I've met people who do this, it's really fucking annoying. I'm sorry anon

>>16249309
>It just fucking happens
Well now you can try to catch yourself

>>16249328
>with intentions that, in the eyes of most sailors, were even more criminal and blasphemous than the coldest assassination
Sailors would pound ass all the time

>>16249325
>Could you expand on these biases?
the normal ones, first and formost. "women are emotional" "men are rational" "boys don't cry" "girls don't roughhouse." etc, etc, etc.

they of course leave psychological scars that are much more complex than that. Women go into STEM fields a lot less, men start applying femininity to completely arbitrary things ie "is it gay to buy a rose-gold phone case?"

down to how we raise our children, or how we were raised. difficulty in connecting with other people, self recrimination if we don't fit the expected metric, aggression towards others who don't fit our metric.

my father has no idea how to show emotion- my whole childhood, he was either explosively mad, or funny-goofy. He can't recognize why people react to actions, and doesn't know how to respond to other people. As a consequence, he's now all alone and has no friends, and is depressed. I as a consequence suffered in my childhood that my reaction to things is fucked up, and I'm miserable because now I'm the only relationship my father has that he doesn't see as actively aggressive towards him.

That's just surface level shit. There's so much more, and it's such a complex topic. Of course, learning these things is considered by a large group as "feminist drivel" or some shit, which is ironic. It's just society, and it takes generations and generations for these things to change, good or bad.

>>16246058
nigger do you think actual roasties are here posting pics of rice milk?

>>16249337
thanks. I'm sorry too.

>>16249353
yeah. I try.

>>16249328
You realize pirates were very gay. It was a thing.

>>16249390
There is a reason to an extent that these biases exist. Some is excessive, like the rose gold iphone example, but the expectation that men hold in their emotions is perfectly acceptable in my view. Men protect women because women can't protect themselves. If you break down crying in front of a woman, believe it or not you have abdicated your ability to protect her. But here's the thing. This doesn't mean men shouldn't show emotion. But men should learn to manage their emotions, and if times get too tough to hold them in they share those emotions with other MEN. This is why fraternal organisations have existed in various forms throughout history. I'm a leftist and I can see this plainly to be true.

>>16249423
>Men protect women because women can't protect themselves.
proving my point.

>>16249429
As a heads up, I'm not this anon>>16249423. I'm the anon in the original >>16249023. If I remember to, I'll reply tomorrow.

>>16249325

This is actually a game I play with people to see how much they believe in equality. Latin Americans hold it like a direct threat against you. They always demand respect and some of them push it cause of macho mental illnesses. Americanized people eventually lose this pretention and see everyone as equal but based on the invisible capital. Which is how you can tell they're superficial. Everyone is measured equally against capital but capital is Godhead.

>>16249448
aight. I'll probably be here.

>>16249429
They can't you dipshit. If you think these this are essentially societally constructed then you have no meaningful experience in the real world. This doesn't mean there isn't a lot of bullshit, but even once you chip away at the bullshit you are still left with essential qualities which form the basis for broader societal expectations. Fuck more and I guarantee you will begin to understand.

>>16249361
>>16249407
Huh. Didn't know that. It makes sense though.

>>16249463
>They can't you dipshit.
Physically, maybe, but the ability to take care of yourself is more than being able to fight off a man that wants to rape and murder you. Most men can't do that either, if it comes down to it. But then dipshits like you act like this is a fact that should define our society to the point of discontent. If you look back in history, so many things are defined by the gender laws. Go look and you'll be blown the fuck away how many "feminine" things started out as "masculine" and vice versa. High heels, the color pink, Star trek, beer. Why is cooking considered "feminine" but Chefs are almost always male?

>>16249475
a lot of gays became pirates because they were illegal anyway.
some became gay because of that hot pirate action.

>>16249267
That's a really good point. I had a meal plan at my university for unlimited visits to their buffets, so I would eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner there, and it is extremely hard to resist never getting a donut or something when they're sitting right there. Like addictions though it goes away in time. I had a soda addiction in my early teens, and after going cold turkey on it, I can still have a coke every now and also not drink soda for a year if I want. I assume sugar is the exact same way.

Congrats on your achievement, also. This kind of thing really is no small feat.

I sometimes what would have consumed my life had I not been addicted to video games.

Every now and then you have a cool dream and you just have to tell someone about it.

In this one I was on a Napoleonic, or perhaps American Revolution era battlefield. I was some sort of scout active in the early morning mists. The objective was to storm a redcoat fort.
For reasons that make sense only in dreams the gate to the fort was open, which only I discovered because of the morning mist. Having acquired this intel I run through the mist back to the ruinous battlefield where in the distance I can see my army marching. I find myself yelling that the gate is open, and that they should charge.
Usually in depictions of this era of warfare there are two misconceptions. That soldiers only walked around in leisurely ordered fashion, and that they managed to keep their uniforms clean. But when I tell you these guys ran, they ran. And you've never seen a more ragged, dirtied, damaged group of people. So I witness something I would never see in real life, an army running towards me as I wave my hands at them like a madman.Eventually they stream past me and enter the fort, and before long a horrible commotion explodes. Gunfire and screaming and death rattles as the enemy is caught by surprise.
Those parts of dreams that have a mystical sort of realism occasionally shine through. This was one of them. The sound of battle, of men getting blown apart by ugly big musket shot or bayonetted in their guts, is sickening. It's the equivalent of ten thousand babies screeching crying in terms of unpleasantness combined with the loudest thunderstorm you've ever heard.

Anyway that was my cool dream.

I need a job desperately

https://youtu.be/RsWsMfSR_2g

can zoomers really watch this shit and not feel stressed out and angry? what is the target audience for five people shouting over eachother, repeating themselves louder each time in a competition to see who can shout down the other, while a moderator goes LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN LISTEN for 30 straight seconds?

do zoomers really sit there watching a "debate" between 10 cuckolds with microphones screaming over one another, tent their fingers thoughtfully and say "Mm, quite, I can't wait to see what 420WEEDSLAYERX is going to say when he's finished screaming his way into the conversation"

is it the same thing that allows boomers to listen to CNN talking heads american yell-talking over one another? to me it just feels like a wall of sound

what happened to the kat thread?

>>16249874
Warosu heaven. It had nothing to do with literature

>>16249928
True, women can neither produce nor understand literature

>>16249928
buttercunt always pruning kat threads

>>16249295
>even if she admits she would be down to sleep with me and teach me the ropes if i ever went to visit lol
I mean, on one hand, if she's really willing to do that for you, then you've got nothing to be intimidated by. She's giving you a chance to even out the playing field so that you can close the experience gap, with her and with all other girls. At the same time, in my experience getting into a relationship with a girl like that gives her a lot of power over you that she can use to fuck with your head. If I were you, I'd throw away my pride, casually fuck a thot who's willing to teach just to no longer be a virgin, and then continue the search for a non-screwed-up woman.

>>16249952
Anon produced that thread to whimper about her feet again

>>16249967
I’m not the janitor. Did you not see that guro thread this past week? He left it up despite a dozen reports, but then banned me for a posting the same artist. TWICE

>>16250013
AHEM
I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT TO MAKE MY FELLOW FROG POSTERS
BUTTERCUNT IS NOT THE JANNY TRANNY?

>>16249253
the who recommends 50g of sugar a day though

>>16248923
They just finished a two part book on the samurai avatar right? Are they any good? Are the comics any good?

lying in bed all day eating chocolate like sex and the city or something. what's on my mind is I'm thinking that maybe I shouldn't have kids. I can't really imagine giving that much of myself. also on my mind is that I went with a friend and did some charity work a couple of nights back and I really felt like I wanted to do more of that, so I'm thinking of reading ahead for my classes so I can get time over to help his soup-kitchen. I wanna ask my friend to teach me to make ultra cheap vegan food, then I could effectively feed the homeless on my own. we'll see what I do and don't do, it's easy to talk a big game, but it's on my mind. I wish I was stronger mentally. I'm thinking a lot about inner struggles and what I think they are. I think a human being exists in two dichotomies, the heart-God dichotomy and the heart-world dichotomy. The key is that the problems come from the heart-world dichotomy, but the solutions are in the heart-God dichotomy. You don't beat the bad on its terms, you chase it away with the good. I got a lot of old hang-ups that are absorbing a lot of energy, just vain bullshit thinking like "oh how did I come across that time" or rememering I did something cringy and really feeling like shit about it, completely overestimating the value of the event/the harm done. Really not much is anything, but when the heart is poor of Gods love it attaches meaning to something else, and that's how you get fucked. I think the 7 deadly sins are just the classic categories of what a poor heart will find meaning in in the world. Essentially pleasure one way or another. for me it's vanity. thinking also about a woman I met. she seems nice and all, but I have that fucking incel-travesty going where the moment a woman is the least bit nice to you you think you love her. lucky for me I guess I realized that all I want is her body, that's less of a consuming fantasy than playing house with some imaginary woman in your head. I at least saw it coming and fought it, and I feel like the outcome was a lot better this time than it has been. also thinking about how I want to maintain a religious-trad-y relationship to women where I would largely avoid them just to avoid having my peace of mind rocked by these pathetic little tales, but I think it won't be an option in my culture. I wasn't raised that way, and it's possible I'm just being an overthinking autismo. I've also thought about how I overthink everything. I'm always uncomfortable from overthinking, but one day recently I got too tired to overthink and got to a state of just being and you know what? I really like myself when I'm not overthinking. That was a good experience.

man I wish I could meet all of you and just talk and have a drink or something desu

>>16250013
wait a second. it was probably you who reported the thread though
>ET TU, BUTTERCUNT?

With religion gone life has become utterly meaningless. I literally can’t even imagine someone living a meaningful life in the modern world. I’ve thought hard and realized there is something we can do - take revenge on the STEM retards. They took away all the beauty from the world so we should make their gay lives as miserable as possible

>>16250498
If you live in Boston you could attend the next /lit/ meet up

>>16249023
Due to gender confusion, I've skittered away from advising young women on how to love men. When I was younger, I viewed it as an ace up my sleeve. I somehow knew that cultivating an inner strength to hear a good man's woes was what kept him around, not a pretty face or bedroom tricks. That may draw him in, but won't make him stay. I ran away from women as friends, mentors, and proteges my entire adult life. I don't understand how one can view a man as a safety blanket and nothing more.

>>16250624
>you who reported the thread
And others. And it was never pruned, the picture never deleted.
Janitor should be let go

I just met my half sister and biological dad for the first time a few months ago. We've only hung out a couple times and we texted frequently for a bit but not so much anymore. I'm at a point in my life where a lot of good things are happening and so far I've called them to tell them I'm engaged, that I got married (eloped), and now my wife is 12 weeks pregnant. They don't seem to reach out to me much so I'm hesitant to make this call... Just feels awkward but I want to tell them before they hear about it elsewhere.

>>16244269
of couse they're in denial. the one thing that pervades the modern mindset is an perverse and ubiquitious rejection of reality. gender and race denial seems to be the final hurdle before we all slip into some bezos-muskian technodream where all reality is washed away forever.

>>16250804
we've confirmed race to be a social construct though

Silly grin stupid face
makes the onions boys
jump in joy when in her grace
Oh my I fucking yell to this awful sight
This hoe will be purged my unrelenting might
First I will chop off her feet
open them to the bone
For both of her parents to see
and the white pointy finger bone
I will show up her ass
make her scream like a priest in mass
Jesus you will need young girl because when im done
hes the one that one you will call
i will never be done
because god is me
and the spirit
and your only one
jesus yup

>>16250729
buttercunt, the destroyer of fun and shitposting

>>16250679
ah fuck I'm a eurofag. When's the meetup though? Could you post some pics afterwards? I really want to know what this board looks like

Gotta go to work tomorrow
Gotta go to work
You need to work
Working can be fun
Gotta go to work
Thanks for the work dear owner
I will be the best worker
Thanks again

>>16251009
The (would-be) destroyer of shitposting and shit posters. I would like my old lit back.

semester starts tomorrow and the anxiety is too real because I'm a fuckup autist retard

>>16251088
what major anon

>>16251141
philosophy

>>16251071
youre clearly an old fag. yet youve never steeped yourself into the culture of anime. the culture which has played an integral role in the founding of Four Chinnel, and where its legacy continues to flutter throughout the myriad of boards that come (and go) into existence
WHY?

>>16251088
it's gonna be fine anon

Since writing general is in hibernation my fiction got on royalroad top 50 trending sometime yesterday and it got me very emotional because I never thought I'd make it big in a way.

>>16251224
what makes you say that?

>>16251176
I just don’t think /d/ material is suitable for /lit/
Devotees of amputees are a mixed bag I think. I legit fell for a woman with missing legs. Fetishists actually want to cut women’s legs off.

>>16251380
I don't know you, I have no idea, but things usually turn out fine, at least if the only reason they wouldn't is that you're nervous.

>>16251088
Try to relax and let anxiety go, anon
https://youtu.be/hBWDIzHldPg

what if the Ghislaine Maxwell thing actually takes a bunch of people down. she's been alive for a while now

>>16251408
what. am i missing something here?
or is this one of those "you see how X isn't suitable for Y? then why would Z be suitable for Y?"

>>16251286
Post link, faggot

>>16243873
>Write What's On Your Mind
The last 50 or so years of aid have proven Sub-Sarahan African countries are shit holes not due to economical factors but politics, specifically weak institutions. Why? The typical arguments made are cultural, historical, colonialism, etc while taking a wide berth around the taboo topic of IQ and race. Brain drain is also a factor, with the best and brightest usually immigrating away resulting in low IQ leaders leading an even lower IQ population. When will this elephant in the room be addressed? Maybe in 50 years time when Africa is still a 3rd world country and they run out of excuses? Who knows.

>>16251524
maybe, but also if you look into the economics of it, specifically the congo or central africa, the aid is preventing local buisness from making profits and in turn no economy can grow, theres no healthy free market competition or even some commie tier fiscal policy because the free stuff from the aid destroys all competition, how can a african farmer sell food if denmark flies in planes of the stuff and gives it away for free? Just a factor but i agree with the race an IQ factor as well

>>16251503
https://www.royalroad.com/fiction/31062/saga-of-the-cosmic-heroes

>>16245170
Ah, my brother...

A common atheist argument: Religious people all assume their religion is correct while denying all others, which shows a lack of self-awareness and a kind of stupidity. But think about this. Doesn't that same complex apply to most arguments? We do not have good foundations for our beliefs generally - most of them come from hearsay, or from anecdotal evidence which is necessarily flawed. People speak constantly about things they cannot be certain of all the time. Why do they do it? Two reasons: They may be unaware they lack all the info, or they have something to gain from it. Realistically, in most cases it's somewhere in the middle. I try to have an open mind about most things, but this often leads me to giving time to opinions that are just as poorly informed as the ones I want to avoid having. So in a sense, being stubborn like this is an act of self-defense, of asserting your own individuality and power so it doesn't surrender to others. A person who gives his ear to all opinions will collapse under their weight. To be a functional adult, you must make at least some unwarranted assumptions because that's how the world is.

Perhaps I'm missing something, I'm not sure. The idea of facts vs interpretations also interests me a lot, but IIRC it is nietzsche who writes about that and I am probably too inexperienced to approach it

>>16251487
Blue board. Anonymous posts a gore-as-art fetish drawing and it stayed up for about a week. What do you not get?

>>16251575
The title's a bit on the nose there.

>>16251859
i was asking why, despite the fact youre an od fag, aka you started during a time when the influence of anime culture was much stronger, are you not into anime like the rest of us dirty degenerates
>moot senpai starts 4chan for the anime
>culture of anime heavily influences all boards, even those that arent /a/
>somehow you arent into anime culture

>>16251792
Nietzsche said that there are no facts, only interpretations of facts

>>16251962
I love Miyazaki. Used to collect Battle Angel Alita, play OG Animal Crossing.

>>16246622
you don't understand, I'm 31 almost 32 and I've never even been that close to asking someone out, it's like a cliff
doesn't help that most of the people I would've asked were people I just met briefly but social shit is just so hard and unrewarding, I don't really want more friends I just want a girlfriend

>>16251985
pleb
commoner
>NOT ONE OF US
https://youtu.be/LInsBfSy2Qc

>>16251928
It is what it is. Thinking up a working title was difficult for the longest time. Some friends I asked also gave the same advice, though it was 'Legend of the Cosmic -' instead. I thought about 'War in the Stars' for the longest but I think that worked better as a arc title or sub title. Before this specific setting was conceived there was also 'Mobile Troopers' or 'Records of the Mobile Troopers' before I finally settled on the Saga thing.

Sometimes... I feel a lot of things...

I want to see two girls on onlyfans and I have the money. But something tells me that paying for porn somehow crosses a line... I mean, porn in itself already makes me feel dirty, now PAYING for it? Jesus.
And yet...

>>16252053
I have ascended

Did you like Little Witch Academy? It looks cute, though I have little time for cute.

>>16252455
Never pay it. Wait for the material to leak.
I’d sooner advocate you spend it on a prostitute.

>>16252455
Why is new porn being created? There's effectively infinite porn already.

>>16247196
stop posting pictures of whores on my boards

>>16252469
i actually havent seen a lot of anime, and i havent watched anime in a while
ive seen enough to be considered a weeb by normies, but not enough to be accepted by the true weebs
My Little Witch Academia does look cute, and ive heard plenty great things about it
>>16252491
>"I’d sooner advocate you spend it on a prostitute."
YOU HEARD IT HERE GUYS. BUTTERCUNT THINKS ITS ALRIGHT TO VISIT THE HOOKERS
brb going to catch some STDs from some cheap hooer

>>16252497
You have a point, but I want to see that specific girl debasing herself -_-

>>16252053
What are you doing this evening?

>>16252570
shit post on Four Channel and masturbate

I don't want her
I want her to get out of my head

>>16252593
I meant in relation to your name
Sheesh

If you don't want to be part of the healing process please be clear about it.

Amazing, that is what a bicycle is. Some metal scrap, rubbabubba rings and a dickied cushion for your fart conservatory, and you can travel for what feels like forever.
Imagine taking a twenty year old ladies bike without a middle supporting beam, and just revolving your flipflappers, without a care for the future, stranding yourself in the forest. Cold, tired, miserable, hungry. Looking around for anything edible, whilst talking to a mirror. Painful, long and distended death by heavy metal poisoned ponds, and mosquito bites from your worst anxiety breakdown.

>>16247083
yeah that's why elven cities are always depicted as smog choked insect hives and elven women are buck toothed, yellow skinned, and spend all their elf-dollars mutilating and painting their faces to look like another race

>>16252620
LOL
it literally translates to "tonight hit tiger"
its a reference to a movie where the pronunciation of "how are you" in French sounds like "tonight hit tiger" in Cantonese.
it's also an allusion to Water Margin where Wu-Song beats the shit out of a tiger.

>>16243885
march feels like two months ago man. where did time go? I should've read more desu.

Never felt more hopeless in my life. Wish I was a normie cattle person like my sister

>>16252707
What are you hopeless about?

>>16243883

Perhaps you're unlovable

>>16249325
>we
not speaking for yourself is disgusting.

>>16252710
>Politics
Feel like conservatism is completely dead and hopeless. All the future will be is queer mulatto corporate soup
>Gender
I'm trans, but I feel like it's just not going to work. I'll never look or act like I want to
>Family
I just don't have any real relationship to my family yet
>Feeling constantly lonely and isolated
>Feel like I'm developmentally behind everyone else
>Just isolated and alienated

*LIBGEN*. light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. *Li*, *ib*, *gen*. the click of the mouse taking a trip of three steps down the search bar to click, at three, on the torrent. *Li*. *ib*. *gen*. She was *lib*, plain *lib*, in the morning, holding 100k books in one nook. She was epub fiction at night. She was sci-tech pdf at school. She was the bookshop on my desktop. But ontop my laptop she was always *LIBGEN*

Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, exhibit number one is what the seraphs, the misinformed, simple, noble-winged seraphs, envied. Look at this tangle of thorns.

I was an atheist for about the first 25 years of my life. Then after reading Kant and later Schope etc. I lost my faith in a purely material world because I realized the truth of idealism and the world as representation, which leaves some unexplainable questions about what consciousness truly is, and creates space for a soul that science can never touch. I became something like an agnostic, open to spiritual concepts but not particularly swayed by any doctrine. I read Hindus, Daoists, existentialists, countless philosophers for many years, and became increasingly open-minded, but no more "directed" I guess in terms of my thought. Recently I've been reading the Bible, specifically the Robert Alter translation of the old testament and the KJV of the new testament. It is resonating with me much more than I expected. When I look back on my teenager days of being an atheist it is with a great deal of embarrassment because I'm realizing that many of the things I made fun of were deeper than I realized. May try firing off some prayers to Jesus Christ soon. So long as I feel I can do it earnestly and unironically in a spirit of faith.

At the store I work at I like to go to our meagre book section if I can find a minute to slack off. It’s mostly garbage, supermarket novels and children’s books, but I still like to flip through one of them if it seems a bit interesting. Today, after we had closed and I was going through the store to tidy up where I could, I came upon our book section and picked up a colourful children’s book called ‘The Planets.’ It was a colouring book with stickers included that gave facts about our Solar system. I only leafed through it, and so can only paraphrase a part of the section on Earth that simply fascinated me. It talked about the future of humanity, it imagined that Humans might one day explore far into space, might combine with robots to create a new species of Cyberhumans. The book encouraged the child reading to imagine what the descendants of these Cyberhumans might do, what they might look like, and gave them a picture to colour in and a sticker of colourful spacemen to help them. I’m still wondering why reading this has touched me so profoundly, when did I lose the ability to imagine a Cyberhuman world, when did I become more interested in reading books about the lives of sad people then reading a story about the Cyberhumans? What happened to me?

>>16252161
The title just stuck out to me because there's a well-known anime called "Legend of the Galactic Heroes", which is also military/political space opera sci-fi. No worries, though, titles are hard.

Everything has this ethereal tinge of shittiness to it. Astonishing.

The ability for everyone everywhere to record video is destroying society. Not only can't anyone get away with anything, which is good and bad, but relatively contained and local follies get amplified in the global consciousness. Then comes the internet's evil eye of hate transfixes on whatever sorry asshole was having a bad day that day and must saddle up for their five minutes hate. Comparatively small infractions become acts of self-annihilation beyond repentance.
It doesn't stop there. Because anybody can see what's going on anywhere, it enlarges and interconnects anxieties by spreading tainted knowledge. If nobody knew about the stupid things others were up to, political travesties wouldn't escalate. While there are some positives to pervasive video recording it's overshadowed by the outrage and overstimulation it creates.
I'd confidently say this is one of the top 5 things that's fucking society up.

>>16252963
You give specific reasons for abandoning Christianity, but not one for finally coming back around to it. Do you want to elaborate?

>>16253316
I agree wholeheartedly. The sky is filled with anxious words

When i have to write an email i imagine the receiver to be extremely hostile, annoyed, unreasonable and irritated.
Needless to say ive been postponing sending some important mails for 4 months now.

>>16253349
I might have worded that ambiguously, I was never a Christian, I was an atheist from 0-25 years old. My parents made me go to church for one year, just in case, but I saw it as a larp. In my 20s, idealist philosophy shook me out of rigid atheism. Religious texts from various traditions seen through that lens made me more open-minded to spiritual memes. I started going through the Bible again to study its language for purely aesthetic reasons. But the more I read from it, the more it resonates with the metaphysical understanding I've build from other sources. I used to scoff at notions like God speaking the world into being, but I have a much better appreciation for the significance of speech now. Miracles like the virgin birth or the feeding of the 5000 used to be things I openly mocked as unscientific. But I'm not stuck in a blind scientism anymore, I fully understand that "there are more things in heaven and earth" as S. said. And lastly, I've now accumulated plenty of regrets from my life, so the notions of sin and redemption, being oriented towards light, are much more vivid for me, whereas when I was younger it fell flat. Sorry for walls of text.

>>16253360
I finally worked up the nerve to send an email I was putting off and they still haven’t gotten back to me after 3 days.

I grew up in a very small and tight knit farming community, kind of like the mennonites mixed with the JWs.

I left in February, got a job, moved out, got my own car, and apartment. It's been about 6-7 months out of it now. I have to say for how much I chafed under all the traditional rules, secular american culture is far more authoritarian and oppressive, mostly in practical economic terms. In the church, everything was basically provided for: food stipend, healthcare, housing, and transportation. Whatever money members made was put into a pot and distributed as needed. It worked because everyone knew each other and fraud would be very hard to disguise. The system was cheaper, and had better outcomes than whatever you get outside. I'll write more about this tomorrow.

One quick thing to take away, is that if you are feeling alienated and like things aren't right with how the world is, your feelings are absolutely valid, and are the correct response to your environment. Don't let people gaslight you into thinking that the current system is one hospitable to human life

>>16243873
Lately, I just feel satured by "life" for the lack of a better expression. It's an odd feeling but it makes it pretty hard to get excited about anything. I don't think I would suddenly feel great if I owned 1 million more tomorrow or feel suddenly worse if I became broke. I also do not wish for company of people, it's not so much that I hate them but I think most things just revolve around the same few things and that includes people through the societal forces that work upon them. I don't get upset if somebody cusses me out or get happy if I get complimented. Lately I don't even feel any particular attraction towards women and the idea of casual sex seems almost depressing. Even if you relocate or do something drastic, soon you settle into a new habit and that's it, it's not terribly different from what you had before. Of course there's some cool hobbies you can do and appreciate nature and whatnot but there is still a distinctly empty feeling left. People in this kind of state of mind usually leave for a hippy commune or some radical shit, but honestly I'd feel bored even there, like hippies and the hippy life doesn't seem this great different thing to me nor does being a part of a revolution...it's like yeah...we've had that before. Yeah people want a new system and a new hierarchy of power, cool, never seen that before, huh? Oh you want to just live on the beach, smoke pot and play crappy guitar? Yeah bro, radical, never seen that before. And I mean you can choose any "radical" alternative society and they're all basically operating by the same principles. Of course, I am sure God is the answer but that is precisely the problem, a world that cares for everything before God can seem boringly misguided if one looks at it as having a God-given principle. In light of that, accumulating wealth, rising on social hierarchies and all the stuff that people care about ranging from usual to "radical" seems of little importance. In practice, of course it is tiring to see people be so heavily invested in these superficial, worldly things, that they actually order something of far more value, like relationships between people, according to them. It's the easiest to see if you just stay calm and have an appearance of modesty, you will be of no use to a large part of population, simply because their lives are so informed by that social principle that the fact that you might have something of value to offer as a human being will not even appear as a conscious possibility to them. If you want the opposite effect, just dress up and be somewhat arrogant. I'm not making a complaint about appearances, but it is simply an easy test to make if you're a decent actor. It's kind of hard to go back and look at the world with that naive enthusiasm that can make it enjoyable. I wish I could still feel happy about the prospect of driving a better car, living in a nicer house or having sex with more attractive women. But it seems of little importance to me.

>>16253551
No problem, that's interesting. It's good to see people question their beliefs and go on to grow from doing so.

>>16253230
Does anyone else feel like we've entered into a new stage of lockdown fever? I feel like the collective mood moves in waves and currently we're in a period of particularly acute despondency and fatigue.

>>16253575
>Does anyone else feel like we've entered into a new stage of lockdown fever?
Yes, people in my city are starting to go loopy, we've only started to see the social and political ramifications of lockdown

>>16253555
Are you thinking of going back?

>>16253614
Call me a conspiracy nut, but I believe that certain radical elements in media have been encouraging these lockdowns in order to bring about this political turmoil. It all seems awfully convenient.

>>16253651
It's crossed my mind more than once. Probably not though, the actual religion there is obviously bullshit. They claim biblical literalism, but everything after jesus was corrupted, especially the epistles they like to share. There's no sense of church history, or understanding of actual christian theology. The pastor even denies the trinity, because he very obviously doesn't understand the concept at all. It's just a theoretic mess, even if it's a practical paradise. Quite sad, the community is built on some very shakey ground and might not last long, though these things do have a habit of staying along much longer than they have any right to

>>16253555
How was it possible to leave your tight-knit community at the start of the world's pandemic?

>>16253555
Did you enjoy living in a tight knit community for the social aspects? I think the thing I hate most about modernity is its atomization of people, but then I have to admit to myself that I like my privacy and seclusion, and then I wonder if I'm romanticising the idea of these communities.

Should I get into wushu

>>16243873

How can anyone live for sex, recreation, and art if nobody can live with themselves?

>>16253685
Have you read Island by Huxley?

I reconnected with my mother today and its been the best day of my life.

She remarried when my dad died and my step father would constantly beat me or fuck with me. There were a couple of times when he wouldn't let me eat but would make me sit there and watch him and my mom eat. I ended up running away and when I returned in my early 20s I got into a fight with my step dad and my mom acted as a witness against me when I was arrested.

She called me out of the blue and and told me she regretted what she did and I forgave her. I always thought it was some.born again joke to turn the other cheek or forgive someone thats wronged you. But the second I did it I felt 14 years of anger and pain melt away. I've never felt so alive or free and I've got my mom back. Feels so fucking good man. I hope all of you guys problems get dealt with

>>16253874
Great to read anon. Hope the step dad is out of the picture. But regardless good for you.

>>16253882
My mom finally left him, which is unbelievably brave. He was disgustingly abusive to her and it was so painful to see the woman who gave birth to you and who you love be abused by someone

>>16253964
Shit...got a nigga’s soul hurtin ta-day

Found out my best friend has been fucking my ex of only a month ago and seeing her, and I just signed a lease to move in with him to a new apartment.
Books can't help with these feel, so alcohol tonight.

>>16253979
As much as it may hurt, remember its an ex. Thats something in the past no matter how you feel about her. Don't lose a friend over that. A friend is someone you share a future with

>>16243873
I am on the cusp of adulthood. My family finally moved us into a real house, with my own room, only so I can leave at the end of the school year. I haven't played videogames in months because I broke my monitor. I'm less angry now, but I still can't seem to get to where I want to be academically, even though it's the beginning of the school year. I got assraped taking pre-cal online despite taking it the last year (missed half of last semester cuz of covid so mommy didn't want me to be behind). I got an incomplete so I can still finish it by December; it still doesn't make me feel any less retarded for not acing a course I already took. I still don't have my license. I was gonna get it in March but covid again, so now I'll have to try to fit it in with all the other shit going on. The only SAT I took was a free one in March, which didn't have an essay, on which I got a 1250. I'm going to finally take an actual one in October; hopefully on this one I'll be able to get like a 1400 at least after some more practice. All I do for fun really now is listen to music and practice for all state. I play bass at my school's orchestra in the top group. I also play varsity football; D-end, linebacker, and we're short on players so fuck it, maybe o-line. I don't even think about getting pussy, despite girls making advances. I just jerk off and forget about it. The only thing I fantasize about now is starting my own computer repair business and making just enough money to fuck off to Alaska where I can die peacefully in the snow. I read into the wild last year and since then escaping into the woods has been a growing thought in my head. I use to go camping a fair bit in upstate NY but after moving to Texas, there hasn't been much opportunity. Hopefully one day I'll get there.

>>16253979
Your ex of one month ago? Meaning you only dated for a month?

>>16253101
that happens to be one of my inspirations so it works out in the end

>>16254035
He means he got dumped 1 month ago.
>>16253979
Don't drink. Break the lease and tell him why you're doing it. Be bold and honest (and sober). Find new friends

>>16253551
Emily Dickinson is definitely a good read and so are most of the other American existentialists if you are looking into that sort of thing.

I know it's not a really deep thought but I can't seem to shake the thought that it must have been horribly depressing being Neil Armstrong. The man summited life at 38 years old and knew it. There was no possible or likely way to do something bigger than being the first man on the moon. How do you even begin to comprehend that you are forever cemented in the history of the world and they'll teach children about you long after you're gone.

>>16254256
>How do you even begin to comprehend that you are forever cemented in the history of the world and they'll teach children about you long after you're gone.

And how is this a depressing thing?

Does anybody else remember distinctly the moment they first recognised their mother as woman and thus for the first time recognised themselves to be male? I remember showering with my mother at a very young age and for the first time comprehending the sight of her pubic hair and absence of a penis. It is seared into my memory.

>>16254349
hmmm

>>16254349

this year and summer was lonely and shitty as usual. I fucking hate this town and this country

>>16254349

the lack of Homeric scholarship on this board bothers me,the constant ''what translation'' threads bother me too because if that many people are reading homer it goes to show that that many people are only understanding homer on a superficial level

>>16243885
i live outside

And so alone
I took to drinking
Bottles of cheap whiskey
And roaming
Through the backwoods
Killing snakes with a sharpened stick

>>16254482
post pics

I've been trying to work out a zero-sum conflict in my own story for a long while. My hero needs to seal off his world from an alternate world so that the alternate world can stop threatening his continent, however the king of another continent can't let him do that, else his nation's sole power source is cut off forever, threatening his nation with unparalleled losses and chaos. I've been trying to make this as air-tight as possible without compromising the moral ambiguity of it and it's been pretty tough.

>>16253614
>>16253663
https://mobile.twitter.com/MichaelPSenger/status/1270925788389486593
Everyone should read this twitter thread. It's enlightening and the implications are disturbing.

>>16254770
I've read that article but there's nothing about the lockdown in Italy

it's pretty crazy that we have a cycle where right wing politicians make wild claims about left wingers, and the left wingers basically retort "nuh uh" as if that was a victory, all the while not realizing that the right wing audience is never going to read their reply but are going to assume that their populist daddy owned the libs. the left keeps answering like the right is going to be fact checking, and they're not

>>16254901
>that their populist daddy owned the libs
when all he did was lie

>>16254901
>>16254908
even if Trump is voted out I fear this will be a lasting legacy. I believe democracy requires a degree of respect and civility, and Trumps main selling point is that he has none. I doubt it will be possible for future candidates for POTUS to pull back out of this ocean of piss

What a silence...

It's a beautiful day, one that reminds us of what summer is like. The environment, with its warmth, its light, its smells, seems to want to call people to itself. Without a doubt it feels like a ripe spring day, although in reality it is only the end of February. Ignoring this oddity, it's a real treat. Yet, there is practically no one around. The streets are rarely traveled by any cars and their hissing is vaguely perceived. The sidewalks occasionally see pedestrians pass by in their shiny clothes that reflect the intense sunlight. Their faces are largely covered by masks, which prevent them from being distinguished from each other by the distance. They keep at a distance from others, and give grim looks every time someone "invades", even if just by mistake, the personal space of several meters that they have created around them. Some bring dogs. These stand with their heads down, as if they were heartbroken and trot listlessly betraying their natural playfulness and energy. There are also those who push wheelchairs, a sight increasingly rare, but which occasionally shows up. These, in order to best guard their precious cargo, resemble in some ways incubators on wheels, which filter the air and allow the right amount of light to enter. The shops in the streets are almost all closed, and the restaurants, bars, pubs have been for a long time only a memory. It almost seems that there is an epidemic in progress, an event in which a treacherous microorganism that looks more like a tiny device than an animated creature, breaks down that macroscopic and very complex machinery that is our society.
This is half the truth as there was a disease, but months have passed since its actual disappearance. Despite this, people continue to largely avoid the outside world, and stay at home unless forced. It is not the first epidemic that has hit us in recent years, and people have not forgotten the fear of contagion. Too many serious illnesses of various kinds in a short time have left a real physical and mental burden. People very often no longer have confidence in being outdoors, in crowded places, interacting with strangers. This is because another germ has spread among many of the people in quarantine: that of social evil. Many are no longer accustomed, or no longer willing, to get to know each other, accustomed to loneliness and our increasingly advanced and alienating pastimes, which have helped to distance us from each other. Maybe it's just a phase, but who knows. Meanwhile the silence persists, and it is more and more grave.

The waves part to greet me
A sopping, black blanket to lie underneath
A slate mirror to wave back at
A friend
Or an unflinching executioner
I love them both the same

At the heart of all beauty lies something inhuman
And nothing's more remote than lost paradise
So I usually just solve my problems by letting them devour me

>>16255005
Not bad anon. I especially like the second part

I'm an idiot surrounded by idiots; my balls itch. Why isn't there a job where I can do nothing? I hate work. I honestly want to just die. No, I want the world to die with me. My balls itch; this is stupid.

>>16254913
Trump certainly is an all time low for the USA. He’s the embodiment of a democracy eating itself up.

>>16252883

>>16253790
I was out before most of the really harsh lockdown restrictions
>>16253795
I honestly feel like I'm in a different country now and don't speak the same language. Privacy can be nice, but it's like no one cares what i do or think anymore so it doesn't matter. No more random phone calls from people genuinely wanting to know how you are doing, or people thinking about you outside of economic terms. It's incredibly dehumanizing and I don't understand why worldly people aren't ardent (actual) revolutionaries. People don't realize just how enslaved they are
>>16253809
It's on my list, is it any good?

>>16255241
Term one is Huff's How to lie with statistics
I hope term two doesn't turn into how to lie with smoking statistics

>>16255005
>I usually solve my problems by letting them devour me

Yeah that's the one

>person posts something
>their post reveals a property of theirs
>they dont realize this property has been revealed
>feel powerless
>close the thread
>stop coming on /lit/ for weeks months
>repeat
I'm too wise for this world

met an old lady who didnt want to believe me i was from the red cross (i was from the red cross) so i showed her my pass and she just waved her hand, pointed at me and yelled "imposter!"
granted she had a point
indeed, i'mposter
but so next i showed her my certificate (i carry around a red cross certificate granting me permission to do the deeds i tend to do) and she said "i m p o s t e r!"
which well, isnt that uncommon in this line of work
but what it made me think about, i. e. the reason im writing this
is the way you can just
choose not to subscribe to some framework
and theres no "absolute" way to change your mind
theres nothing you cant point at and go "fake!"
which of course is nothing new
not a novel insight
but still
frameworks are a cardhouse
so tall
the bottom cant be seen anymore
so tall
the bottom probably crumbled long ago
but we
we're building higher faster than we fall
>so keep rowing
>the wheel keeps spinning, but--
i want to touch the earth
i want to fall and crash into it and lie in my crater
but no matter how fast i fall towards it
the earth falls faster

>>16254901
Each side has their own set of "facts." That's politics. The (American) right wing is putrid and delusional but lately I've been more critical of the left, which hallucinates its own reality just as much if not more so. The left is hemmed in by its own political correctness, finding it impossible to say and do what has to be done for fear of offending one of its token minorities or breaking with its deeply racialist identity politics.

I absolutely despise my mothers cat
I come home, hungry after a long day of work and this entitled ass thinks he can hop up on the table and sneak a bit of my curry !
Why do people eve want pets? They ruin your back yard, kill the wildlife that actually serves a purpose. Their diet and medical bills cost you the world just so you can get those small happy feelings when you get home just for it to meow in your face and leave trails of fecese all over the floor and on the table.
Same goes with dogs. However I do love dogs, I would just never own one for the same reason. Most people I know who own pets don't dare think for themselves or the rest of humanity.

>>16252871
Gee I wonder where the source of your problems may lie.

>>16255830
Huh?

>>16252871
>trans
Well that's where you fucked up lmao

>>16249268
Personally I put a lot of effort into never giving conclusive answers. Or to paint a more accurate picture in your head, I try to keep things vague. Jumping straight to the end of this tangent, I suspect it's a defense mechanism against committing myself to people. I don't want people to know my standpoint on things that matter. I don't want to give them the tools needed to turn me into a stake holder in their own objectives. I don't want people to know a single thing more about me than I consciously want them to know, ideally.
I can't be arsed going through the motions again (and you're probably far from invested enough to care for them) but the last time I followed this train of thought I came to the conclusion that I have a socially unacceptably low appreciation for companionship. I don't feel loneliness, I don't feel homesickness, I don't miss people, I don't yearn for social interaction. Do me a favor and ignore the /r9k/ tier phrasing here, I'm in an analytic mood right now and can't be arsed phrasing things more affably. I have zero emotional reservations about burning bridges with people, no matter how good the terms we are on, and this is where it loops back to the start. I avoid giving people the impression they are close to me, because when push comes to shove I'll most likely rather just ghost them and accept I'll never talk to them again. But I'm not an asshole. So I try to avoid letting it come to that in the first place. So I avoid getting close to people. Keeping things vague is one of the manifestations of this modus.

Anyone know any good passages by Goethe, Nietzsche or like Melville/Dosto on people that just feel practically no yearning for social contact at all? Like, any reputable opinions (i.e. not yours, though be my guest) on whether this is something I should fix?

Fuck this night time headaches. They keep me up all night and ruin my energy for the next day.

i genuinely believe i am the smartest living human

>>16256066
Smart in what sense?

>>16254901
Delusionally onesided view
Both of your wings are gaslit to hell and back

>>16254330
you have no where to progress from that point. Life, for me at least, is always being better and doing better things than you did in the past. So doing something so big and important that it'll be your entire legacy at 38 would leave me lost wondering what the point of doing anything else would be.

>>16255622
A property such as?

>>16256074
i would say rational thought and comprehension

>>16256132
Take this guy >>16256119 who doesn't realize his entire "the struggle towards the top is, in itself, what keeps me going" is mere self-indulgement, feel-good-about-yourself cope

Now I don't doubt you've met your fair share of le habitual internet hobby psychoanalysts, but you've got to cut me some slack here, in a sense psychoanalysis is what litereally all interpretation of people's behavior boils down to so of course it plays a role here as well. And don't get me wrong, I'm not (just) some perching vulture waiting for people to reveal some personality-trope that lets me feel superior to them, I'm also talking about the classic fancy Freudian slip where people I'm actually affiliated with reveal more about their opinion on some third party than they intendended. And just to cover all my bases, I don't blindly believe in what is actually just my gut feeling either, alright? These "social reads" I'm talking about don't turn into some factual entry in a dossier but just into a little post-it tacked onto the dossier for later reference in case of relevancy.

>>16256199
How do you know what you're good at is "rational thought and comprehension" and not actually just "the ability to delude yourself into thinking you're good at rational thought and comprehension"? See for example people that mistake hindsight insight for actual insight, i.e. "duh, obviously this is what was gonna happen. Could've told you myself as well" or perhaps more pertinently, "ah yes, this passage by Shakespeare is precisely what I have been contemplating myself recently as well. Good to see we are of one mind on this matter."

Do you have any OC?

>>16256199
>rational thought
>comprehension
its always the stupid pseuds who have never built anything who can be genuinely this arrogant to place 'rational thought' as the highest manifestation of intelligence.

>>16256240
inb4
>calls himself wise
>doesnt know the difference between i.e. and e.g.
It slipped by when rephrasing the sentence ok

>>16256240
>How do you know
i don't

>Do you have any OC?
yeah its tails from sonic but he's the avatar from the last airbender

>>16256253
i've built many things, for instance a shelf

>>16256392
So were you shitposting from the start or do you actually have some reasons worth stating for believing you're noteworthily smart?

>>16254349
I accidentally saw my mother naked when I opened the door of my parents bedroom. I must have been 3 or 4. Before that, I thought everyone had a penis

whoever doesn't believe in evolution has not had a proper fruitfly infestation. I'm telling you none of the slow fruitflys are ever fucking again. Meanwhile I faced one who was more like a hero in character, measured in movement, cautious yet unafraid and faster than the blink of an eye. The white whale fruitfly: he's gonna fuck again. I'm sure of it. I almost admire the guy.

I decided to read the 2020 Pulitzer prize winners for non-fiction. One winner was Anne Boyer who wrote, The Undying. 290 pages of psychobabble. Pure dreck.

Just moved and the ONE thing I forgot was a fan. KUSOOOOOOO
My compressed air canister will have to do

Got penis on the brain

>>16252871
>Feel like conservatism is completely dead and hopeless.
it always was
>All the future will be is queer mulatto corporate soup
it won't be but if you want to stand by and let shit happen then I won't stop you
>>Gender
>I'm trans, but I feel like it's just not going to work. I'll never look or act like I want to
oh I see now, you hate yourself therefore the world is shit
that's not how it works sweetie, if you hate yourself then you have a personal problem, if you hate your friends they're not actually your friends and you need new ones, if you hate this or that philosophy it just means it's not for you and also you probably don't fully understand why people like it
I bet you're not even 25, little one

>>16252963
this seems unlikely honestly but if you found more purpose in life, especially metaphysical, I encourage you to follow that
just please don't be one of those people that takes it too far and grows hateful

>>16252980
existential bullshit is a phase most of us go through and some of us grow out of, no shame in getting stuck, no one's perfect
but speculative fiction and other grandiose things are the real shit, the actual art to be had is in pushing the boundaries of imagination
don't forget it

>>16253874
every now and then I think how fortunate I am just to have one decent parent
my dad was mostly a no-show and my mom was bipolar and not properly treated for it most of my childhood but she was there and she didn't beat me or starve me or forget about me, and on top of that she made an effort- she ended up being overprotective but not to the point of some people where she completely walled me off from the world, I got out now and then
I'm happy for you and your mom

>>16256240
>Take this guy who doesn't realize his entire "the struggle towards the top is, in itself, what keeps me going" is mere self-indulgement, feel-good-about-yourself cope
dude how do you think people function? living as a human, other than basic needs, is one coping mechanism built on another until it's industrial coping machinery
you're no different with your supposed superiority
is that what troubles you? that these posts are a mirror?

>>16250804
>gender and race
Actual spooks lol

>>16255791
> (...) I've been more critical of the left, which hallucinates its own reality just as much if not more so.
I disagree over the degree but you have a point.
>The left is hemmed in by its own political correctness, finding it impossible to say and do what has to be done for fear of offending one of its token minorities or breaking with its deeply racialist identity politics.
And this, this is bullshit, but it's factual bullshit. I say that as a lefty who wishes someone would actually look out for the lower class instead of being forced to give them enough money to scrape by.

>>16255005
this is good
>>16255101
this is also good, it speaks to me as a former wageslave

>>16255800
I like pets and I love cats but you're also absolutely right. My least favorite people (other than radicals who are liable to shoot up a mall) are "dog people". Not regular "oh I'm a dog person", it's the fur baby dog people. The "dogs are so much better than people" people. Putting aside they're basically traitors to their own species, they always seem to be criminally lacking in giving a shit about anything but dogs. Other people? Who gives a shit. Cats? Who gives a shit. Other wildlife? Who gives a shit. The same goes for cat people. It's honestly kind of sickening.

why do I have the impression that being a genius of mathematics (Newton) is more impressive than being a genius of philosophy (Plato)?

>>16247681
what???

everything is getting shittier but no matter what happens I'll always have myself

I have no friends and I like it!

>>16245154
Cute.