/lit/ - Literature

yea your dreams

>>15995801
>implying
Dreams are the most boring thing there is. Nobody wants to read that crap, not even your therapist.

>>15995798
Anything can be a novel. If you're a good writer you can make a great book out of the most mundane circumstances.

I once ate my cum out of curiosity. It was salty, but I can't tell anyone because they would think I'm gay. I think it could make a fun short story.

Something like 80% of Americans feel they have a book in them. So yeah, I'm in that 80% of idiots i guess.

Anything can be a nivel. I could write about drinkung and tfw no gf, many such nivels exist.

>>15995850
They say that but I always enjoy listening to other people's dreams

i've made some really classic posts over the years. so maybe posting.

That time I got addicted to speed balls with my ex and fucked up our suicide pact could maybe be an okay one.

>>15995798
A drive-by shooting at a fucking petrol station; in little old England! Imported nignog gangs fighting over territory. It's madness here now.

>>15995867
>>15995916
>>15995920
>>15995938
>>15995939
>>15995946
>>15995950
I was fishing for interesting life events, but I guess 4chan is the wrong place to look. The most interesting thing to happen to an average anon is mushrooms suddenly growing on their cumsock.

>>15995961
kys normie retard

>>15995961
What would an interesting event look like to you amigbro?

>>15995968
Ah,a fellow member of anonymous who is what people might call a "robot". I tip my hat to you great sir for it is very hard to find such well mannered individuals who also partake in the understanding of internet memes as well as I do. I hope we can become great friends on this most wondrous of boards on the 4-channel

>>15995987
Well, there was this one time when I overheard a dad explaining to his little daughter that the circular marks on his arm were cigarette burns that the girl's mom left there. They spoke in such a pleasant tone, that I only realized what was actually being said after I left the bus.

>>15995961
i captured a bear with the camera i installed out in the woods, that was pretty neat

>>15996055
what sort of bear

>>15995961
What you were actually fishing for is (you)s and brother, you got em.

>>15996081
brown bear

>>15996043
Okay so you want things like "I was filling at a gas station in a little town on the boarder of Nebraska and wyoming built around a giant plaster Jesus when a shirtless Hispanic high in his early thirties
high on what I can only assume was methamphetamine stopped yelling at the nonentity sitting in the passenger seat of his bright red lifted ram to come over and tell me not let my wife (long haired male companion) drive my car three times before putting a lawnmower from some guys yard into his bed and speeding on up the offramp."

>>15996085
that's for contributing to my 4chan attention seeking ventures

>>15995798
I have Lou Gehrig’s disease

>>15996201
How bad is it?

My mom was always obsessed with my small dick and lifted the bed sheets each night to check that I was naked and my penis had "room to grow." She openly discussed her concerns with her friends who would smile at me sympathetically. Mom even made me show both of my aunts my penis and got annoyed when they laughed. She asked the local pharmacist if there was anything I could take that encouraged growth. This was in front of the female assistants and other customers as I stood there blushing. She asked for regular updates on my erect size and, again, would tell friends and my aunts. Asked my best friend to let her know if the other boys ever bullied me over my small penis
She even told me that my 12 and 13 year old cousins were already bigger than me. Mom asked my sister if she had any friends who wouldn't mind having a "small" boyfriend. My sister thought it was hilarious and started to tease me and told her friends. I was glad to escape to uni and never lived at home again

Maybe a short story
One time I slid my car off a cliff and rolled it 4 times down the side of a mountain before landing upside down unconscious
Woke up with pissed pants, a concussion, a total'd new car, and my phone was dead. So I climbed out and it was night time and I could see the moonlight shining through the trees. So I climbed up the mountain and walked a couple miles to town to a gas station and went into the bathroom and there was blood all over my shirt and neck and stuff. Like an idiot, I got a taxi home instead of a hospital and called the sheriff and told him what happened and then I laid in bed for a week because I was sore from the whiplash

>>15996691
sounds fun, I'll borrow this maybe

Kind of. My personal life is boring as hell, but I've met very interesting people and I have something of a character arc going on, with an ending that I already know/hope for. I'm absurdly lucky too, I can't believe how I always manage to weasel out of the consequences of my actions and always seem to have just what I need to solve my problems fall into my hands even if it comes right at the last minute.

>>15996727
Luckily, no one got killed or seriously injured and my car insurance covered the whole thing but I didn't have that first time accident forgiveness or whatever, so now I have to pay more on my car insurance because of it

>>15996775
...that's your perspective on life? Oh no, I have to pay more on car insurance?

>>15996770
>I have something of a character arc going on
oh no
>I always manage to weasel out of the consequences of my actions
no no no
>always seem to have just what I need to solve my problems fall into my hands even if it comes right at the last minute.
oh no non non no

You think it's all a blessing, to escape consequences and get by the skin off your teeth - but a blessing can easily turn into curse. Those awful, horrible, traumatic experiences that you've been spared? Those are what actually makes us who we are. Your life doesn't go more smoothly without them. Just the opposite in fact. Instead of learning and changing so you're not faced with any more bullshit - you continue exactly as you were.
Sooner or later, everything is going to catch up to you though. So, I guess it's all the same in the end.

>>15995798
My story with my ex-gf would be a great novel.

>>15996901
sure thing, normie

>>15996792
Idk, yeah
It did kinda make me look into theology a bit more, but initially all I was thinking about was my insurance and whether or not my job would tolerate my absence because I needed to recover from the whiplash

>>15996945
literally gregor samsa

My entire life, and especially that of my brother's and our relationship(s) with our parenrs would be a bitching Faulkner novel if only the names and setting were changed a bit. I think about that a lot, but wouldn't dare write it so as to not make them any more estranged than they currently are. Maybe in 30 years..

>>15995798
i would read buttercunt's autobiography desoo

>>15996979
>implying they would ever find out in the current internet age

>>15995798
yes i excavated archeaological sites for about a decade in the middle east

>>15997021
thats cool, any signs of curses? do you believe in that stuff

>>15995961
So you're a fucking loser looking to feed off other anons lives just so you could get a fucking dopamine hit from it? Fuck you and your thread

>>15995798
dios mio

>>15996885
Yeah, you have to drink deeply from the cup of suffering. Try not to flatter yourself, but retain hope. Try to abstain from indulgence, but reward yourself with it when you feel you deserve it.

>>15995798
I came, I saw, I left. Some novel

>>15995798
No. Maybe all my drugging, partying and sexual adventures could be made into one interesting character but not a whole book.
>did ketamine in a club bathroom with a woman twice my age
>she bit me
>took cocaine from heavily tattooed bald russian stranger named dimitri that I met in a public park
>took lsd and took the train at 5pm to a hookups house
>didn't understand what she wanted me to do when I got there, was kicked out.
>had a really awkward cramped threesome in a shower
>slipped and cracked my head 30 minutes in
>went to parties hosted by a girl who ran a porn studio
>everyone was always half naked and drunk
>she pulled clothes off people she thought were too covered

I think the mildly interesting part is I was extremely lonely and isolated the entire time. I went home and cried after most of these experiences

>>15996770
That hits close
>Weasel out the consequences of my actions
I have the occasional dread for the one event, one day, where my luck will run dry and I'll get a royal assfucking from life

>>15996561
That sounds like a nice way to induce murder suicide

>>15995798
Some of the shit I got up to in my early teens could be interesting as a framework for a story
>visit cousins in a podunk town up north
>adults all go out drinking
>eight of us sneak out at like nine thirty
>meet up with friends of eldest cousin
>drink cheap vodka they brought
>younger brother tries to prove he's tough and has way too much, ends up vomiting
>we just drag him along with us as we explore the town while he struggles not to dry heave
>eldest cousin has the bottle, is getting progressively drunker and drunker as she drains it herself
>see two scruffy looking native guys staring at the liquor store across the road
>they have an empty shopping cart
>one of them pushes the cart in front of him and builds up into a full on sprint, slams it into the liquor store's window
>fucking bounces off and is thrown to the ground
>other guy gets him up and they book it as the store alarm starts blaring
>elder brother decides we should try and find them for shits and giggles
>end up actually doing it
>find them on a bridge
>they happily explain that they broke in before and they must've reinforced the window after that
>both middle aged and missing teeth
>police sirens start in the distance
>they politely say they gotta run and hop down into the ravine below the little bridge we are on, book it down the creekbed
>we wander a little ways away so we don't get picked up and sent home for being out late at night by the cops
>couple minutes later, here the police dogs and screaming
>walk down to the docks
>find an unsecured zodiac
>pile ten of us in and go out on the water at midnight
>eldest cousin is by this point completely gone, she's native so she can't handle her liquor in the first place
>falls in
>it's like 54 latitude N, so water is cold as fuck
>we just barely manage to drag her back aboard, she's now simultaneously suffering alcohol poisoning and hypothermia
>we call it quits for the night and head back to uncle's house
>just put her in bed and let her sleep it off
>my middle brother, the one out of the group of us who didn't come along announces proudly he beat Through the Fire and Flames on expert
>parents, aunt, and uncle, are home like half an hour after us
>so drunk from the bar they don't even ask questions
>early morning wake cousin up and convince her to go to the friend who gave us the vodka's house so our parents don't suspect anything
>she ends up getting grounded for a week for leaving without telling her parents
>they never find out she almost drowned in the ocean