/lit/ - Literature

>>15103008
Jerk off

>>15103011
cringe

Start with the Greeks
But unironically I would recommend Stoicim or if you are edgier Nietzsche

>>15103008
That's not a philosophical question. It's an issue addressed by self-help therapy, psychology, and the like. Good luck.

>>15103020
OP here

Thank you Im kind of a newfag and have trouble separating both topics. So is there a good psychology or psychotherapy book you would recommend?

>>15103021
I've read Meditations and thought it was kind of retarded most of it, because in my experience stoicism helps with the little problems of day to day life but when shit hits the fan its kind of useless imo

>>15103008

It's difficult. One mental trick I have sometimes found useful is to imagine a third party looking on, whom I would admire. It's more important what *he* thinks of you than it is the random stupid stranger you're actually faced with.

>>15103029
Philosophy concerns abstract matters like the nature of cause and effect, space and time, possibility and necessity, mind and matter, knowledge and reality, etc.

Psychiatry and clinical psychology are fields devoted to helping people overcome their fears, correct their delusional thought patterns, control addictive behaviors, etc.

>>15103008
I feel u man, a phrase that constantly popped into my mind when I used to go through that kinda stuff was that "they are just as scared as I am".
Like think about it, we're all fragile little shits in this world from our own our perspectives, we all have those deepest fears especially with something like tribe rejection, most likely scenario is when you fuck up right in front of them they'll forget and start worrying about their problems later on

>>15103008
start drinking

>>15103008
It is simple you see.
Your ego is depending on its validation from external world which is not in your control therefore it is irelevent to you unless you willful want to subject yourself to ups and downs of such a paradigm.
What is in your control is your ego and you're awareness that animates it.

This world is dogs barking at each other no more no less , it would be very stupid then to take it seriously.
You're taking the role you play seriously therefore you must step off the stage to critically see the situation as it is.

In practice you must be a watchful master, as fire arises (your ego taking opinion to heart) you see its unreality and put the fire off with your awareness until its dissolved .
Most automatic thoughts come from deep sea of unconscious awareness ,they're not yours you must disregard them.

Jesus said, "Blessed is the lion that the human being will devour so that the lion becomes human. And cursed is the human being that the lion devours; and the lion will become human."


The veil has been lifted and you have been enlightened anon, continue in immortality

>>15103065
Thank you for the explanation :)

>>15103067
Yeah that helps a little, my current best tactic is basically whenever I will do something that I know will feel judged, I think "Its just an experiment, this doesnt reflect who I am". This way my negative beliefs validate themselves and I'm impulsed into action, and after doing what I feared my negative beliefs dissolve because I finally see that all the problems were in my head

>>15103104
How do I consolidate not caring about the external world and also be ambitious?

>>15103008
You should care about what other people thinks. But you should not let what other people think hurt you. Short answer is that don't be a insecure pussy, don't fear of being wrong, try to learn as much as possible from other people.

>>15103127
>How do I consolidate not caring about the external world and also be ambitious?
again, start with Meditations and go from there
your only enemy is your judgment of yourself
poor is the soul which leaves to others the means of its own happiness
you are the only one in control of your own judgment

>>15103008
read enough books and do enough math that you're legitimately confident in your ability and before long you'll realize most people around you don't give a shit about any of that

>>15103018
Stfu, it works for some.

>>15103104 (You)
How do I consolidate not caring about the external world and also be ambitious?
Awareness practice put off the fires and play your roles with conscious knowing that youre playing a role without getting urself lost in it

>>15103008
You're not giving me enough to work with, when you say not caring about what people think, do you mean how to not care about people who you hate or hate you, or do you mean how to not care if you make a fool of yourself in a social situation?

>>15103183
>or do you mean how to not care if you make a fool of yourself in a social situation?

yes that

>>15103163
My problem is that intelectually I know I have nothing to fear, my biggest problem is that on an emotional level I still feel it. I don't know If I'm explaining correctly.

But yes awareness does help but it is still not enough for me to take action on certain things I want to

>>15103141
Yeah that definetly did the trick for me, after reading enough books and internalizing whats in the books with what I see around me, I've predicted the future too many times to be scared of a lot of shit lmao

>>15103008
>how do I stop caring about what other people think?

fundamentally impossible. not even theoretically conceivable. try explaining to me what this means and or looks like.

>>15103232
That is why meditation is important , emotional body is like a monkey that must be beaten with the stick of awareness , any feeling not useful is to be disregarded

>>15103247
>try explaining to me what this means and or looks like.

Not caring to the point of taking action instead of being paralyzed by possible judgement. of course its impossible to completely not care

>>15103008
you only need this post anon-kun >>15101848

Cut off all ties from the people you derive worth and meaning from. Learn to torture yourself. The innate drive is to care about other people's opinions. Force yourself to be alone for a really long time.

>>15103291
People who deny desire are the biggest copers, that post was massive cringe

>>15103297
I came here to say this. Basically follow this Anons advice and spend a lot of time on your own cut off from family, friends and society in general. After a while you won't give a damn about other peoples views of you, and you'll wonder why you ever gave a shit.

>>15103304
you can't escape suffering, deny desire or don't

>>15103348
Desire is literally free energy, I never understood why people say desire is bad lmao, as long as you dont get too attatched to it

>>15103412
>I never understood why people say desire is bad
because it creates the illusion that when you will achieve that desire you will get happiness, thus it create more suffering

>>15103008
Give them 100% credibility in their judgement.

Don't forget, if you're interested in a topic, explore the opposite.

>>15103457
Explore the opposite? How come

>>15103412
Being a high acheiver I saw that paradigm tons of times, yes reaching your goals dont lead to happiness, but overcoming the obstacles of your goals is where happiness is, nothing beats the feeling of realizing you're stronger than you are

So yes desire is necessary and vital to lead a happy life

>>15103648
I meant for this >>15103426 anon

>>15103648
what do you mean by desire?
what are your achievements?

>>15103008
Start with Seige and then the turner diaries. Alex Linder has some great audio books for free

>>15103679
Ill give a quick example. I always had the desire of being fluent in german, which I had no prior knowledge of. I started learning german by myself and after 5 year I passed the C2 goethe fluency test.

Passing the test brought me 0 happiness, but looking back at what I did and all the mental hardships I overcame (feeling incompetent, thinking I will never be able to learn german) that gave more happiness than anything else

>>15103711
good for you anon
i think that anon was talking about sex, drugs, partying, working mindlessly like a slave for corporations and government while thinking you're a hot shit, desiring expensive clothing, expensive car etc.

>>15103729
So basically its only hedonistic desire that is bad? That I agree with, but I also think full detachement from it can be counterproductive, we all need to relax once in a while

>>15103648
I think everyone is different. I’ve never been unhappier than when I fulfilled certain desires. The second unhappiest I’ve ever been was when I was striving under the whip of desire to fulfill them. Desire did nothing for me besides push me to confront the void. I had the delusion that desire could be satiated and I fell into the trap like many. I now realize desire is a symptom of unending change in a world of constant flux. I had a deep existential crisis when I realized there was nothing worth doing with my life and that there’s no stable place to anchor my boat in the world of storms.

>>15103008
It's a lack of confidence. 95% of your problems stem from a lack of confidence, and fear. You have to believe in your capabilities and act on them, to be able to focus on yourself in a productive way rather than getting stuck in your head thinking about others.

>>15103008
>how do I stop caring about what other people think?
you won't
and you can do however is learn to control the urge to judge yourself based on external factors you cannot control
learn to acknowledge the ephemeral nature of your life and that none of your worries make sense in a big enough perspective