/lit/ - Literature

>>13816377
You shouldn't. Read a Catholic Bible.

You shouldn't.

>>13816391
>>13816394
Ignore these
If you read the Bible cover to cover, your entire inner self will change

>>13816377
Read the original

>>13816377
Because it sucks. Most of the things /lit/ tells you to read suck and this is no exception. So just read it, you little bitch. At least its more mechanically practical than Infinite Jest

>>13816377
The bible, and other religious books, are philosophy books that were taken too literally. You can learn a lot from them, they have stuff you can quote, and you earn braggin rights.

Do it anon.

>>13816401
Yeah, it definitely encouraged me to never board another hype-train.

>>13816377
Because it is true.

>>13816485

Weirdly enough I was about to buy a bible today, had one in my hand but remembered there where certain versions better than others. Couldn't remember which was which though do I didn't bother.
What's the best one to read?

>>13816401
will it really?

do i just start with page 1?

do i read the OT?

>>13816696
How is it weird that you were picking up a book which is in constant rotation as a topic on this board?

>>13816696
Anon I have a funny story to you reply to me if you wanna hear - it pertains to your story

>>13816706
Cause I'm never on this board to be honest.

>>13816715
Does it end with you calling me a fag? Because if it is, I already heard that one before and I didn't care too much for it

>>13816696
NRSV and NKJV are the two best versions.

>>13816740
No

I felt the sudden urge to go buy a Bible, so I went to Barnes and Nobles t oget their special edition I saw an anon here suggest

but they were out!
so i couldnt get a bible :(

funnily enough both of the people helping me find the bible were gay (one had the lgbt flag all over their shirt - i didn't mind it)

>>13816756
The Lord works in mysterious ways.
>>13816755
Thank you m8

give me a basic gestalt on the OSB

Which OT and NT books should I absolutely read? No more than 3-4 for each.

If you say "all" I won't read any of it.
If no one replies I won't read any of it.
If anyone suggests John I won't read any of it.

>>13816943
Isn't actually Orthodox.

>>13817024
so what do English Orthodox Christians actually read?

>>13816997
Genesis
Exodus
1st Samuel
2nd Samuel

Luke
Acts
Romans
Philippians

>>13816997
>OT
Psalms
Ecclesiastes
Job
Lamentations

>NT
Revelation
Matthew
Pastoral epistles

>>13817032
They don't, you should be very wary of "English Orthodoxy", they all have a extremely strained relationship with the mother church and are considered spiritual deserts.

>>13817037
>>13817089
Hell yeah now you're talking.

>>13817153
Despite what people would have you believe the Bible isn't actually have long, reading the synoptic gospels doesn't take more than a couple of hours, you go to the pauline epistles for answers and generally don't read them like a book, Acts requires you to have a good understanding of Luke though.

>>13817175
I mean the entire fucking thing is only 1000~ pages.

>>13816377
Because it is the most influential book ever written. Whether you agree with it or not it has shaped the development of the western world. Almost every Christian author prior to 1900 would have been intimately familiar with it and it deeply influenced the development of these subsequent works. Even if you get nothing from it spiritually its essential to read it so as to understand the world we live in.

>>13817142
So what should I read if I want to learn about Orthodoxy in English?

>>13817032
Most english ortho churches are fine with the NKJV or KJV or ESV.

The Ortho Study bible is a good supplement for the footnotes and what not.

There is also a new Ortho translation of the NT. You can probably find it online.

https://www.amazon.com/Orthodox-New-Testament-Translated-Leatherette/dp/0944359256

>>13816377
So you can realize that no one actually gets their morals from the Bible and that its actually full of and condones some seriously sick shit.

>>13819221
t. buttpirate

>>13816997
>If anyone suggests John I won't read any of it.
SHIT taste

>>13819222
Okay

To see for yourself just how deeply it taints and corrupts the soul.

>>13817229
Okay and why should I read it in its entirety?

>>13819222
No, buttpiracy is disgusting but I don't need Jewtales one through twenty seven to figure out not to put my weewee in a shithole. Thanks

>>13816401
Man I really felt my inner self changed when I read all those censuses and endless genealogies

>>13820095
Not to mention the dimensions of Solomon's Temple and Palace. It was especially impactful the second time around after I'd read like 6 other completely different narratives and half expected I would hear the exact same story again. I broke down and cried.

>>13820133

>>13820224
Yeah I don't like Christianity but we can surely do better than this kind of Reddit fodder

>>13816377
Don't. Read Stirner instead.

>>13820116
KEK it shuld be a meme

>>13816401
Bible is actually extremely hard hard to read and understand with your first try. It's most likely impossible if you really want to go deep. I've seen many times during my life how interpretation changes the more you know so you might understand the same verse differently after some time passes and you experience more - get wiser.
>>13816394
nice joke, seriously

>>13819234
I skip John because I prefer not to read fiction

bcuz of its influence on others.

>>13816696
Douay Rheims is the best version as it is based on the original Latin compiled bible translated by based St Jerome

>>13820084
Because if you are unable to fully read even the most influential book, then why read anything at all?

Second chapter of a first Kings book was basically Godfather in a nutshell.

The bible is an okay book in parts. I liked the Torah in Hebrew it's written okay and I find it interesting even though I don't particularly like fiction. New testament is much worse comparatively I'd rate it a 4/10 it's like bad fanfiction.

>>13823654
>citing a Latin translation as 'original'

this is your brain on Catholicism

>>13816997
Ephesians, Cornithians, Romans

>>13816377
nah

>>13816377
It's meaningless propaganda that is meant to expand on your moral compass. If you read it, most of what brings you entertainment will eventually offend you because of the mindless shit is on there. Sooner or later you'll be enforcing agendas for no reason other to benefit your little idolatry-based world.

>>13816377
You only need the Gospel

>>13816377
John 14:6 kjv
>Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

Because it's the truth anon, Jesus Christ really did die for our sins to open up a path for salvation worldwide. Because we are all dead men walking in sin and are hellbound without the blood of Christ.

Romans 6:23 kjv
> For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Many churches have it wrong and teach a false doctrine of work base salvation. True salvation is simple because Jesus died in our stead and paid for our eternal lives with his blood. All we need to do is humbly accept the free gift of salvation by believing in him and his name only. You can all get saved tonight anons.

>>13816377
Acts 16:30-31 kjv
>30 And brought them out, and said, Sirs, what must I do to be saved?
>31 And they said, Believe on the Lord Jesus Christ, and thou shalt be saved, and thy house.

All you need to do is believe anon, the world makes it harder for us to believe, because this world is not of God.

Because your parents told you so.

>>13816377
The King James version of the book of John is regarded as one of the most beautiful pieces of English literature, even admitted so by non believing scholars.

One of the most Chapters in the Holy Bible, Psalms 23 (KJV)

1The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.

2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.

4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.

6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the Lord for ever.

Unironically, I feel like reading and knowing the main "plot" of the Old Testament is just a damn smart thing to do. Like, it's one thing for people to be less religious than in the past, but the language and concepts of the Bible underlie a LOT of shit.

I also somewhat agree with >>13823693, in that reading the New Testament (while also important to understand some relatively modern things) is a slog, especially *after* the Old Testament. You may dislike or end up disliking some parts of the OT, but it's written fairly well overall. The NT's Gospels, along with most of the NT, is just Jesus as the central mysterious badass fanfic character that intentionally and in a cringey-as-fuck way piggybacks on OT concepts (esp. the prophetic OT books, which is most unreadable trash).

>>13816377
Do yourself a favor and read the Iliad instead. Don't embrace Abrahamic slave morality.

>>13819222
Lot fucked his two daughters and God was A-Okay with that, then he offers them up to a crowd of men to be gangraped and God thought that was okay too.

I could go on and on, but I've got work in a couple hours and don't really care all that much.

>>13816459
this. Jewish law and scripture should be read and contemplated before considering the Moshiach.

protcuck translation spam incoming

>>13816459
this but ironically. read a torah with annotations then go to the NT with annotations (catholic version best)

>>13816377
read the quran. its concise, simple and really soul lifting. quran.com especially sahih international. you can read the bible, unless you wanna go to like thousands of pages for different versions: unlike the quran which is ~600 pgs