/lit/ - Literature

>He was a skinny little faggot that hated everything and everyone

>>10956943
a minor civil servant living in 21st century St. Petersburg who has retired completely into what he calls the “internet,” a state of total alienation and isolation from society.

Average height, average looks, he seems like a genetic afterthought.

>>10956943
The man was not meant to love bird.

He was a man of exceptional capability, excessive intelligence, remarkable wit, incredibly hilarious prowess and a seemingly impossible amount of willpower, or so he thought.

I mean, by describing myself as I would describe myself, wouldn't I be describing myself as a male author would?

I am a male author. I describe myself by listing my writing credentials, and at the end I add, "And I'm otherwise unimportant."

>>10956943
Manlet with no physical coordination, grace or self esteem. Nice big dick though.

He carried himself with squared shoulders in a way that felt forced. The greyed flesh around his eyes exposed him as a troubled man. Instinctively I avoided any friendship with him so that his sorry state of being would not rub off on me.

>>10957141
*RECORD SCRATCH*

Well lots of women in their 40s and 50s say I look like Fabio so like Fabio but skinny

>>10957631
Now, he's a dog!
It's gonna take a lot of new lessons AND SMELLS to help him learn what it REALLY means to be Man's Best Friend
*splat sfx*
in theaters April 5th

>>10957631
>>10957765
L.M.F.A.O.
Laughing
My
Fucking
Ass
Off

He stood tall with a lean musculature that seemed to carve into his body. Around him were four young college girls, two in each arm. All of them showed primal eagerness to be inseminated by him. The door closed behind him; the lights turned off.

>>10956943
He was a loser in the purest sense of the term. Not only had he lost before, but he continued to lose. Faces on the street in their casual conversations continued to remind him. His hair was not stylish, his clothes ill-fitting and uncool, his looks little better than average, his existence scarcely worth noticing unless perhaps you might bump into him on the street. Unlikely, as he rarely ventured beyond the walls of his shabby hovel.
What a loser.

>>10956943
>the other boards have worked out we're a taco fest
fuck off we're impure

>>10958030
Then the lights violently snapped to attention, rousing anon from his visions of nubian beauties, and the door was clobbered open. A big boned, meaty, heave set woman emerged and gently parted her lips. She said "It's time for school anon! I packed your tendies in your sonic lunchbox!"

>>10956943
He was pale, eyes like a dying star and could be distinguished from a crowd by the electric curls of his hair and that retreating, even despairing sigh that seemed to carry farther than its volume should have allowed. Sneakers with holes in the sides, blood stains on the toe and a jacket over a hooded sweatshirt, dark blue, black overcoat with a tear in the elbow. Average height, slim built, quick footed, took strides far too great for his frame and would almost certainly go on to develop weak knees and ankles from the violent contact he made with the pavement. A small but defined jaw caught in sun beams, alabaster skin, with little brown star clusters drawn over his midface. The diamonds in his ears, cheap, black jewels probably synthesized in a laboratory or pulled out a hellmouth in South America, sat precariously in the detached lobes. Dirty long fingernails, distinctly skinny, if a bit gracile, digits, the last four of which on the right hand connected to knuckles bearing unmistakable scarring from adolescent bouts of manic rage. A sickly Osirian energy permeated his world, everything already mummified, preparing for a parodic resurrection in the pale light of a dead sun eclipsed by a mirage sattelite, some xenolith brought about by his presence here now. The shadow it cast covered everything thay had befallen him, every person’s face shaded into half-living hues, a life lived inside an alechmical cauldron, enclosed world, incipient crypt keeper.

>>10958163
do you have a wicked sense of humor?

>>10958175
Utterly humorless, if anything an offputting mess of a social creature. Best kept away from polite company

>>10956943
The epitamy of a below-average high school offensive tackle past his pathetic prime, desperately clinging to any bit of athletic and social prowess he had once held

>>10956943
A father's shame and a mother's grief, a nothing of a man.

>>10956943
He had AIDS.

>>10956943
He's not exceptionally well built nor very tall. He has that kind of fading youthful energy of a man in his late 20s, but that is not what overwhelms me every evening. Rather, when he unzips his pants and lets that monstrous flesh bludgeon loose I actually notice God's material work. It is large, veiny, throbbing and pulsing with menace and pain. I am now decided that I will not face it again, not alive anyway. Tonight it's either me or him. I assume he loses some bit of control when It becomes erect but I am afraid he'll baton me with it like that frightful first evening he took me. Either way this goes, this is my last diary entry. May God see me through this.

This is OP, if you find yourself reading this say a prayer and consider yourself lucky

>>10956977
>>10957141
>>10957389
>>10958030
>>10958063
>>10958163
>>10958217
>>10958225
>all starting with "he"
STOP BEING UNORIGINAL

>>10956977
dunno why, but this tickled me. i'm similar, wanna be friends?

A slouch hat cast its shadow over the rounded, sluglike face. There was something unpleasant on that face; something between a smile and a yawn. He sat at the table, head canted so the brim covered his eyes, and peered into his phone like a cat peers at fish under water.

>A man of pure intellect, wit and talent, he truly was a beautiful baby. His height, baby, definitely did not bother him, at all. He had sharp, ice blue PEEPERS and never once complained about his balding forehead. A solid fellow was he! built to last he was! and his his height did not bother him, at all. He was an average looking bastard and never once sucked someone else's pooper -- not once, let me say.

He thought of himself as original until he realized he was 99% memes.

>>10958244
I did it cuz everyone else was.

A man in his mid twenties, possessed by wasted talent and potential, unsure of what to do with what remains of his pitiful life.

>>10956943
truly funny btw

>Intelligent, Nihilistic and with a Wicked Sense of Humor.

Also, I don't get it, do they only read shit authors?
It would have been funny if they mentioned the author's name and used their style, but it's all cliche like.
>tfw want to support feminism but this kind of shit keeps popping up
This must be a russian propaganda shit, those "women" being bots or something to give the left a bad name since for some reason gender politics and all that shit got injected to the left and now it's a party thing instead of a non party universal argument.

>>10956943
Charming arrogance is better than charmless modesty. Sadly he was possessed by charmless arrogance.

>>10958245
No. Fuck you.

>>10956943
His stature was short but thicc, the wide shoulders he carried seemed to dwarf the rest of him. He carried a monster cock, as wide as his shoulders it seemed. As he walked, his monster cock would split the concrete, making a deafening scraping sound. His thicc thighs seemed to be a pre-condition to carry his monster cock. He had a fucking massive monster cock.
Or so he thought.

>>10960647
p10x

>>10956943
a lobster shaped man with a crabby attitude and bottom feeding tendencies, often limp.

A very handsome gentleman who karate chops his way to every victory.

He was.

>>10960988
Fine then

>>10956943
He has no style, he has no grace.

He could have fucked a lot in college if he had the confidence then but by the time he realized he was attractive to certain women he was no longer attractive to them because he got fat.

>>10957779
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

>>10956943
The read hairs on his chin shown of scotland, but his eyes and hair came from Portugal. A tiny bit of spittle, with tobacco in it, was on his chin.

Subhuman, all too subhuman.

He was a gorilla dick demon who made dyke pussy wet, and he was a good friend.

>>10962917
You're Enkidu...?

>>10962917
you're not david duke

>>10956985
This didn’t get the attention it deserves.

>'male authors'
>pic is pulp romance
>a genre dominated by horny women
C'mon "describe yourself the way Nora Roberts would" is an amazing prompt.

>>10956943
He was a man who was never described in the superlative.

His testicles hang low in his trousers. He felt them see-sawing side-to-side as he walked. His penis hung in front of them, governing them, telling them to behave while important business was being done.

They obeyed, mostly, as the man entered the bank. A sidelong glance awakened them briefly, as the man noticed a young female teller with a good head of hair. A second look revealed her hunchback and the wart on her nose. The man shook his head, and the testicles moved on.

>>10956943
To be frank, she was ugly, not plain, not homely, but actually downright unattractive. Her skin was pale and pockmarked, covering a rounded, doughy face. Fortunately, she refused to make eye contact with me, instead sticking to her dark corner, typing something up on a school computer.

>>10962963
show tit or get off /lit/

>>10962969
>the post is gone
https://www.unexplained-mysteries.com

>>10956943
>a man not
not a man was he
hehe

>>10958103
Did you seriously mistake Nubian for nubile?

>>10962917
>Gorilla dick
Should I tell you the reason gorillas are so mad all the time?