/lit/ - Literature

>>21492039
>What color is the loft? The water? How much daylight is left in "late evening", if any?
Are you fucking stupid? This is not criticism, this is whining. This is the end of the book, why would he waste words to get those marginal things in there? It would unironically kill any sense of longing in the ending by writing out the hierarchy by recording the color of water and sunset. This is no objective metric by which it can be called badly written. What is the shape of the roof of Kinbote's house where he is locked up and writing? What does Hazel's face look like? What was Shade wearing when he died? Nabokov had 300 pages yet he never sketched them, therefore he was an amateur writer!
>look at how detached my character is, having all these thoughts in these short staccato bursts! this is real people!
This is not thought. It is dialogue. The character is in an emotional heavy moment as she speaks. The snippy sentences represent the spontaneous speech. This depends entirely on whether you have had enough interaction with people to know how they behave in such situations. So no comments. Your dislike wouldn't make it bad writing.

>>19353912
You just posted cringe bro

>>18904937
literally weeb GR

>>18868642
>me

>>18691621