/lit/ - Literature

Posted towards end of last thread.

>Deal or no deal

Noel Edmonds stares at me intensely with his beady eyes. I am trying to smile for the cameras but I can only fixate on his fixed, false grin. His clenched teeth are menacing and I feel the hairs stand on the back of my neck. I begin to feel lightheaded.

“Neil, the banker tells me £4,000. Deal or no deal?”. Two minutes ago I was in the running for £25,000. I can tell he is getting a kick out of this sudden misfortune. One of my fellow contestants, Angela, gives me a sympathetic smile. Earlier we’d been joking in the green room what a complete tosser Edmonds is. I’m wondering if he somehow overheard. Is the room bugged?

“Deal or no deal, Neil?”. As one of the cameramen pans in and focuses on my face I see that menacing grin slowly turn into movement. I focus on his lips.

“TOSSSERRR”, I see Noel silently mouth. Oh fuck. I look at the few remaining red boxes and for a moment consider if Noel somehow managed to set this up so I would fail. Just fifteen minutes ago he’d been telling me he hoped I would get the money I needed to help pay for my wife’s physical therapy following the accident. The audience applauded warmly and I even found myself feeling slightly guilty for what I’d said earlier.

“Deal, Noel”, I reply.

Noel Edmonds stares at me intensely with his beady eyes. I am trying to smile for the cameras but I can only fixate on his fixed, false grin. His clenched teeth are menacing and I feel the hairs stand on the back of my neck. I begin to feel lightheaded.

“Neil, the banker tells me £4,000. Deal or no deal?”. Two minutes ago I was in the running for £25,000. I can tell he is getting a kick out of this sudden misfortune. One of my fellow contestants, Angela, gives me a sympathetic smile. Earlier we’d been joking in the green room what a complete tosser Edmonds is. I’m wondering if he somehow overheard. Is the room bugged?

“Deal or no deal, Neil?”. As one of the cameramen pans in and focuses on my face I see that menacing grin slowly turn into movement. I focus on his lips.

“TOSSSERRR”, I see Noel silently mouth. Oh fuck. I look at the few remaining red boxes and for a moment consider if Noel somehow managed to set this up so I would fail. Just fifteen minutes ago he’d been telling me he hoped I would get the money I needed to help pay for my wife’s physical therapy following the accident. The audience applauded warmly and I even found myself feeling slightly guilty for what I’d said earlier.

“Deal, Noel”, I reply.

Noel Edmonds stares at me intensely with his beady eyes. I am trying to smile for the cameras but I can only fixate on his fixed, false grin. His clenched teeth are menacing and I feel the hairs stand on the back of my neck. I begin to feel lightheaded.

“Neil, the banker tells me £4,000. Deal or no deal?”. Two minutes ago I was in the running for £25,000. I can tell he is getting a kick out of this sudden misfortune. One of my fellow contestants, Angela, gives me a sympathetic smile. Earlier we’d been joking in the green room what a complete tosser Edmonds is. I’m wondering if he somehow overheard. Is the room bugged?

“Deal or no deal, Neil?”. As one of the cameramen pans in and focuses on my face I see that menacing grin slowly turn into movement. I focus on his lips.

“TOSSSERRR”, I see Noel silently mouth. Oh fuck. I look at the few remaining red boxes and for a moment consider if Noel somehow managed to set this up so I would fail. Just fifteen minutes ago he’d been telling me he hoped I got the money I needed to help pay for my wife’s rehabilitation after the accident.

“Deal, Noel”, I reply.