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Diogenes destroyed all comers in hilarious ways. Read the pre-socratics for more.

Diogenes’ most famous put-down was to Alexander the Great. Diogenes was at home in his barrel. Alexander asked him, ‘What can I do for you?’ Diogenes riposted, ‘Get out of the way: you’re keeping the sun off me’.

Another time was when he was listening to Plato give a lecture using an empty cup as a metaphor. Diogenes interrupted and said the only truly empty cup was between Plato's ears.

He used to stroll about in full daylight with a lamp; when asked what he was doing, he would answer, "I am just looking for an honest man."

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