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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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File: 1.35 MB, 1582x800, Touhou Remilia Flan Thrones.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277289 No.7277289 [Reply] [Original]

Congratz, anon! You have been randomly selected to be the newest member of the Scarlet household!

Your all-important role will the that of a court jester to the illustrious Remilia-sama and her sister Flandre.

When you next awake you will find yourself in your comfortable quarters within the Scarlet Devil Manor. Of course you will be transformed into a little girl, as is only to be expected of a resident of Gensokyo. Your appearance is up to your choosing, but you will wear a mandatory uniform: the stereotypical jesters' cap in bright patterns, perhaps a bit more frilly and girly than usual, and a short dress with similar colors and patterns. Under the dress you will wear spats/bikeshorts/whatever-you-may-call-them to allow you do perform acrobatics (should you decide to) without appearing indecent. Your species is up to you. You may be human, fairy, or a lesser youkai though either way your powers will be the same: the ability to create controlled duplicate images of yourself as well as the power of perfect ventriloquism. These powers will allow you to perform as a full troupe should you need to.

But now the ultimate question. HOW will YOU entertain and bring laughter your eminent mistresses? Do note, should you fail, they may simply resort to torturing you for fun...

>> No.7277296

[X] Genuflect

>> No.7277294

Dumb question, but.

>> No.7277301

*grabs cock*

>> No.7277326

Make a ton of noisy illusions to distract them. Escape.

>> No.7277336

There's a lack of cocks in here :.

>> No.7277353

>HOW will YOU entertain and bring laughter your eminent mistresses?

With my dick.
Fuck turning into a little girl. I will be a manly jester.

>> No.7277365
File: 394 KB, 520x803, Touhou Sakuya Glow Eyes.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277365

>>7277326

Oh silly jester, escape is not an option. You are bound to your mistresses and should you leave the premises (aside from when accompanying them and remaining in close proximity) you will become a dessicated corpse by the next night... either that or the headmaid will get you... So long as you perform your duties, you will have comfortable lodgings, plenty of exquisite food, and the pleasure of serving the most refined and elegant beings in Gensokyo - along with your happy fellow servant companions.

>> No.7277374
File: 79 KB, 550x796, harley_quinn-741495.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277374

commence operation Harley Quinn

>> No.7277375
File: 47 KB, 920x964, 1292562798673.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277375

Fuck it just drink my blood already and get it over with

>> No.7277381
File: 44 KB, 838x734, 1289942571870.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277381

Frogs
Lots of frogs

>> No.7277384

I'd be the greatest overactor and overact with my clones. However, I'd probably fail and be relegated to Remilia flossing duty or something. I'm not very funny.

>> No.7277403

>torturing you for fun
That is not bad you silly OP

>> No.7277412
File: 19 KB, 475x358, 1292749721018.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277412

Can I just break that huge window behind them and escape?

>> No.7277414
File: 775 KB, 1000x783, Touhou Remilia Ahegao 2.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277414

>>7277403

If that is what you would prefer, then so be it.

>> No.7277418
File: 13 KB, 250x187, joker-christmas_small.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277418

bring laughter: create some kind of comedic routine with my clone self, act out episodes of Seinfeld or re-create Schindler's List with comical sound effects and musical numbers.

>> No.7277421
File: 67 KB, 654x709, 1300177587979.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277421

Simple OP.
With my ability to create clones i shall recreate the Monthy Python show.

Should this not be good enough i will create a army of clones and play a eternal hide and seek game inside the mansion.

Should i win i will be given freedom, should i not they can do whatever they want with me~

>> No.7277424
File: 25 KB, 400x300, rwj.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277424

whats happenin flandre!?

>> No.7277428

>>7277414
I do as you please my mistress

>> No.7277434
File: 121 KB, 640x567, kawaiioperator.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277434

i get out of there as a the kawaiiest loli while OPERATING

>> No.7277437
File: 364 KB, 700x990, Touhou Remilia Reaction.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277437

>>7277421

mmm, yes. This image brought a smile. You may do well.

>> No.7277452

Laptop, Season 1 and 2 of the Young Ones with Jap subtitles and a solar charger.

In the mean time, I'm leggin' it to Hakurei Shrine. This shit better count as an incident.

>> No.7277462
File: 755 KB, 1000x708, Touhou Scarlet Family Spring.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277462

>>7277452
>>7277434
>>7277421
>>7277412

see

>>7277365

Do not think of escape. Why would you want to? Why are you so immediately determined to leave? You are given a new life as a cute girl in a luxurious residence. The fairy maids are happy with their life there, why wouldn't you?

>> No.7277464

>>7277289
The only way you can please women.
By sticking your money inside their purses and filling it with cash till their bellies are all inflated.

>> No.7277466

>>7277462
Because I do not wish to be someones bitch the rest of my life unlike most of /jp/.
>>7277464
I chuckled

>> No.7277468
File: 42 KB, 400x400, 1303783263707.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277468

>>7277462
because i want to take it easy and Remilia amanates a non-easy aura

>> No.7277470
File: 248 KB, 500x375, 1297198218060.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277470

Tell stories about the outside world.
Only one thing a night so I can live as long as possible.

>> No.7277473

>>7277424

read it in his voice, even before I looked at the pic

>> No.7277475
File: 192 KB, 774x1252, cf5e458b565223964174479c701f32af..jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277475

I will do my best to serve as the mistresses demand, but as for comedy acts or general enterainment i am probably no good.

I guess for now i should also have one million clones try to escape the mansion in the hopes that one will make it to someone willing to save me..

If this fails i hope my screams and tears will please the mistresses.
..Though to be fair i may not mind being their toy in the end.

>> No.7277477

A physics professor and his assistant are working on liberating negatively-charged hydroxyl ions, when all of a sudden, the assistant says, "Wait, professor, what if the salicylic acids do not accept the hydroxyl ions?" And the professor responds, "That's no hydroxyl ion; that's my wife!"

>> No.7277485

>>7277477
Get out Genndy

>> No.7277518
File: 192 KB, 600x700, Touhou Patchy Koakuma Hug.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277518

>>7277470

Ah, you will do well. Perhaps even the librarian will take interest in your tales. Keep up the good work and there may be promotions on the horizon.

>> No.7277556

>Do note, should you fail, they may simply resort to torturing you for fun...

Great! Where do I sign?

>> No.7277566
File: 72 KB, 400x400, 1303638282917.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277566

Knock Knock

>> No.7277563
File: 53 KB, 386x364, 1300868032892.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277563

>>7277518
YES!
PATCHY GET~

>> No.7277568
File: 348 KB, 800x700, 1299216559917.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277568

>>7277566
GET OUT
OUT OUT OUT

>> No.7277571

>>7277414
Being a masochist I would love to be tortured by remilia.

>> No.7277579
File: 2 KB, 113x126, 1303424621079.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277579

>>7277568
Okay

Mission Success

>> No.7277584
File: 16 KB, 318x318, katt- williams.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277584

I hope they like black humor.

>> No.7277587
File: 706 KB, 1024x768, Touhou Flan Crazy 4.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277587

>>7277571

and Flanny too!

>> No.7277589

>>7277587
Oh yes, that would be very fun. I could die happy knowing its flan killing me.

>> No.7277596
File: 561 KB, 1000x1200, Touhou Flan Remmy Hug 3.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277596

>>7277589

wonderful!

>> No.7277600

>>7277596
Oh how I long for that day ;_;

>> No.7277617

Although I'm sure they would have much more fun torturing me than just killing me outright. I can't begin to imagine how happy I would be.....

>> No.7277625 [DELETED] 
File: 214 KB, 850x1200, sample-421dc90e6a65bff605b330f38af3b0ac.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277625

But Flandre would like childish antics while Remilia would want something more refined. How could I come up with an act that comprises both?

>> No.7277635
File: 242 KB, 900x900, Touhou Remilia Flan Chibi 1.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277635

>>7277625

well as Remilia has seniority, you'd best please her. Perhaps if you were especially refined, she would try to use you as an example to teach Flan of culture.

>> No.7277648

I'll be Neko Scarlet

>> No.7277655

Can I be the chef instead? I like that job better.

>> No.7277683

>>7277655
oh boy, here we go with the french toast again...

>> No.7277695

>>7277625

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cvkBvzpbBPs

>> No.7277721

I would play the lute, and get really angry whenever someone called me a jester, instead insisting on being called a court minstrel.

>> No.7277728
File: 2.17 MB, 1720x1360, Touhou Remilia Throne 4.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277728

>>7277721

No, dear servant. You are a jester, as decreed by the mistress of the house. Should you prove your worth and loyalty, perhaps you shall earn the title of minstrel. Maybe, after a century or so you shall be accepted as one of the Scarlet family and be bestowed with a title to the liking of "Song of the Night" or "The Crimson Bard" or somesuch. But for now, "jester" shall be your title.

>> No.7277735

>>7277728
Song of the night does sound like an awesome title.....

>> No.7277739

>>7277728
Sh-shut up! I'm not some simple clown serving for comic relief, I'm a highly respected musical improviser with a sublime artistic sensibility!

>> No.7277742

>>7277617
>>7277728
What would my title be?

>> No.7277746
File: 6 KB, 217x232, image.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277746

>>7277728
Whatever, as long as I get chest hair.

>> No.7277747

>>7277742
メス豚

>> No.7277752

>>7277747
What a humiliating title. I love it!

>> No.7277758
File: 217 KB, 600x600, 356.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277758

>>7277747
I wish she would give me such a title..
I would gladly be the mistresses public toilet and toy~

Ahn!~
Remilia-sama please punish this slutty jester as much as you want!

>> No.7277801

>>7277758
Sadly one can only dream of it >.<

>> No.7277812
File: 425 KB, 1500x1380, Touhou Remilia Flan Hugs.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7277812

>>7277801

don't lose hope!

>> No.7280307
File: 1.29 MB, 1560x956, Touhou Scarlets.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7280307

>> No.7280356
File: 187 KB, 530x1504, 16786109.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
7280356

Obviously some faux heroics, how long do you think its been since she's heard someone yell "DIE MONSTER YOU DON'T BELONG IN THE WORLD!"

And then when I accidentally grabbed the bible instead of the axe subweapon we'd all laugh.

>>
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