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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/jp/ - Otaku Culture


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File: 83 KB, 600x450, tomoyosnow.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649184 No.649184 [Reply] [Original]

Have you had your daily dose of ronery yet?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBnAZ9oFtwY

>> No.649190

What do you do when you're attracted to a female

>> No.649191

>>649190

Kill yourself

>> No.649194

>>649190

Talk to her in a polite and charming manner.

>> No.649198

I lean back in the bench, which I swear it's purpose built to be uncomfortable. Stretching my arms out, I regain my comfort spot. That's better. I reach out for my jacket's inner pocket, poking around to skip this song in the playlist. The music player changes it's tune, silencing the real world around me.
After some time, I feel a hint of boredom creeping in. Noticing that my lips are stuck in a straight line again, I decide to focus instead in the faces of the passing humans. I waste some time, imagining their lives.
An unmoving face across me. Unfocused eyes staring into a wall, her lips making the same line I notice I'm still making. The fact that it's a female with no company in sight triggers the hunter/gatherer inside me. In quick glances, trying to hide the fact that I'm gauking, I catch her features. Red longish hair, pretty clear eyes, healthy enough body. Not a drop-dead beauty, but definitely an attractive girl.
I start to draw out scenarios in my mind. Maybe I could approach her. I should be able to make at least small talk. Time moves slowly as I fight myself, gathering courage to walk up to the other side and just greet her. Different parts of my mind bark out commands, telling me to not even bother, all women are evil and pig disgusting 3D. I turn off the mp3 player with trembling hands. Anxious, sweaty palmed, and still frozen in the bench after 15 minutes of staring. I can't help but to smile at my own pathetic situation.
Some guy approaches her. Her face lights up, a smile dancing in her lips. Her eyes glitter and fire up with, something; It's been so long, I can't remember the feeling. I continue to steal away some looks at her radiant self, as she happily chats away with, I can only guess, it's a normal, healthy, young man. My very opposite. The self deprecating smile returns. I knew it wasn't worth trying. Closing my eyes under the spring sun, I turn the player back on shuffle. Rainbow girl starts to play.
"Fuck."

>> No.649202

>>649198
God damn it, Colombia.

>> No.649228

>>649194
Best answer, only that it won't work IRL

>> No.649241

>>649228

Only if you suck at charm and conversation manipulation.

>> No.649257

>>649241

I'll have you know I'm perfectly fine at charming a girl. I've obtained the good ending to over a dozen eroge!

>> No.649263

Funny how in Japan this is considered funny and gets wwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww'd yet here everyone gets all BAWWWWWWWW over stuff like this.
You probably wouldn't notice parody when it hits you in the face, fags.

>> No.649268

Squinting my eyes in the morning sun, I turn away from the window. My gaze rests upon her body. Eyes closed, she looks absolutely calm. Her chest moves quietly up and down as she breaths. I roll towards her and embrace her, the smell of her messy hair penetrates my nostrils. Slowly, she wakes up as I watch her; her lips draw a lazy smile.
"Hey," she yawns, moving closer. "Want breakfast?"
"Not right now," I answer, kissing her forehead. "Let's just lie down here for a while."

"Alright." She gives me that catlike smile she knows I love, closing her eyes. She looks so careless and happy right now.

Squinting my eyes in the morning sun, I look beside me. Once again, I woke up hugging the pillow. I roll away from the stabbing rays of the morning sun, chasing the vanishing memories of that sweet dream.
"Another year's gone by." I say aloud to the empty bedroom. A small, humorless smile finds its way onto my face when nobody replies. Stumbling towards the computer, I turn on the monitor for the morning ritual. A few new releases downloaded in the night from the RSS torrent; some spam that managed to get past the filters.
I sigh loudly, slumping into the old chair, almost not wanting to hit the bookmark. 4chan is always a mess this time of the year.
I catch myself sighing once again. The sound of the automatic coffee machine lures me into the kitchen with promises of a better day and my fix of glucose and caffeine. Holding my cup, I look out the silent apartment into the busy streets.
"Another valentine's."

>> No.649434

>>649184
I disregard your link and post my own.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yR7bv68pLww

>> No.649557

>>649198
>>649268

What sort of copypasta is this? Where can I read more of it?

>> No.649654
File: 58 KB, 600x450, 1211223460212.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649654

>> No.649667

>>649268
>>649198

More like this.

>> No.649716

http://www.nicovideo.jp/watch/sm2975813
ultimate

>> No.649721

>>649654
Hahaha oh wow

>> No.649762

>>649654
my pants are shrinking

>> No.649775
File: 61 KB, 800x600, 1211224960725.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649775

table kiss
kiss on the table
it's a table kiss
with the kiss on the table

>> No.649817

>>649716
;_;

>> No.649827
File: 122 KB, 800x600, 1211225523023.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649827

>>649775
I love this pic so much.

>> No.649870

>>649198
oh god, thats me ;_;

this is EXACTLY ME!

>> No.649879

>>649870
You've got to learn to be cool like me and stop going outside.

>> No.649903

>>649775
Why is this thing so freakin' hard to find?

>> No.649911

>>649879
I can't, I have to attend classes.

>> No.649923

>>649198 I lean back in the bench, which I swear it's purpose built to be uncomfortable.
Seriously what the fuck? It's like they don't want you to use them.

>> No.649931

Sometimes I turn my computer chair away from me and lay on my bed. I look over at it and pretend that a girl is sitting there who loves me, but I just can't see her because of the high back of the chair. I lay on my bed and tell her to come over, and talk to her. But she never responds, she never shows herself. I make a deal with her; when I fall asleep she will come to lay with me. I fall asleep, wondering if I will ever feel her touch in my waking hours.

>> No.649933

>>649911
Stop making something out of yourself, faggot.

>> No.649935
File: 104 KB, 750x1100, 1211226898751.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649935

ok a ronery thread. well I have to tell you a story of the unbelievable thing you think ONLY happens in anime. the fateful trip over.

this is the story of my life! I live in a dorm and about 3 weeks ago a young beautiful girl moved in right next to me from a land far far away. it is called "paradisia asia".

so the weeaboo I am I was like OMFG ASIAN GIRL! and started talking to her whenever a chance occured. we cooked together for a few times and talked a lot. so this went on for about 2 weeks. and yesterday we talked about music and that I'm into Metal. so I told her some stories about my festival and concert experiences. and she wanted to know more about metal. so I said:"no prob. knock at my door tommorrow, I'll show you"

and so she did. it was 5pm and she knocked. I was just fixing my Asuka figurine. she entered my weeaboo room. I managed to let the whole "I'm a weeaboo" topic slip under the table for the last two weeks. but she sees my room and is like:"WOW! you're into anime and stuff? cool. I like cosplay! A friend of mine is totaly into it. I'd like to try it out sometimes" my heart did a small jump of joy.

>> No.649939

>>649716
how do i watch?

>> No.649943

>>649935
so she sat down on my bed. and I showed her different kinds of metal genres. Then I stand up and say:"you have to bang your head to it! c'mon try it!" and grab her hand. she stands up and I show how to headbang and we both start and laugh. but suddenly she loses her balance and trips. I try to catch her but because I'm also slightly out of balance my foot gets caught by the bed and we both fall down. it was exactly like NGE. except that my hand wasn't on her breast. so I'm lying on top of her and we look each other into the eyes and she just smiles. in the background Heaven Shall Burn is shaking the floor. I was sweating and my heart was pounding. I never kissed a girl in my life! I'm in my mid twenties the typical /jp/ user. at this moment I thought:"Now or never" and I move my head closer.I must have looked so DUMB but she just smiled and closed her beautiful black eyes and so did I. and then our lips met. It was unbelievable. Heaven Shall Burn shouted on while I felt her soft lips. I stopped and opened my eyes and then she wrapped her arms around my neck and drew me close again and then she kissed me like what Shinji would probably recieved from Misato in case she had survived.

>> No.649944

>>649943
after that we kissed some more and then she asked if I could turn the music down a little bit. then she smiled amused and said "this was your first time wasn't it?" I felt like a little boy. I mean she's about 3 years younger than me... oh boy...

we talked a little bit after that and I started to explain the different metal genres to her, well at least I tried because all I could think about was her.

we have a date in two days to watch a movie together. I'm just feeling so.. I don't know how to explain this. I mean she's like JACKPOT! it's not that I'm just saying she's hot because we kissed. she really IS hot. I can't believe it... and so do you /jp/ I guess. the problem now is that I don't know how to act the next time we meet. I mean what should I do?! Can I kiss her again?! I'm confused...

PS: yeah yeah /jp/ is not your blog.

>> No.649957

>>649935
Ah, school of Water Business. Love it.

>> No.649986
File: 322 KB, 985x1489, 1211227429564.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
649986

>>649939

>> No.649995

>>649935
>>649943
>>649944

Good job, Anon! Don't think about it too much, just do what feels right.

If that was copypasta, fuck you, etc.

>> No.650002

>>649986

>> No.650016

>>649935
>>649943
>>649944
I've read this before.

>> No.650019

>>649995
saw this around few days ago or so. it's a pasta.

>> No.650043

>>649995
>>650016
It's pasta and fucking sucks

>> No.650047

>>649995

>>649935
>kiss copypasta.png

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