Public Notice

[Anonymous No.]

Miss Nyan-Nyan has been banned from the Council of Hags for the following reasons:
- Preying on shotas after her quota has been met
- Changing the therapeutic massage chairs to high setting
- Hiding the yoga VHS tapes
- Not enjoying red wine
- Looking good in young schoolgirl clothing
- Maliciously moving her mouth without talking to trick fellow women into believing their hearing aid broke
- Switching prescription glasses
- Using modern lingo
- And many more!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
>not enjoying red wine
But it LOOKS like red wine! What's the problem? And how can I help it if I just naturally look good in schoolgirl clothing? That's not my fault, you people should have been using the Tao to make yourselves live longer first.
And if you can't tell which glasses are yours, you should really be seeing someone about your obvious dementia.
Now if you'll excuse me, I need to give my cute pet Jiangshi her calisthenics session

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
>- Preying on shotas after her quota has been met
That damn hag! Those rules exist for a reason!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773123
'Nae is the main offender of this law in gensyoko

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773340
Preposterous. Sanae's only offense when it comes to shota is not providing them with a healthy diet, instead opting for stamina and vitality-boosting meals.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773340
The foxes of Gensokyo are notorious for breaking this rule, but never facing serious consequences for it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
>Miss Nyan-Nyan
I refuse to believe that's actually her name. I can't take her seriously otherwise

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
She belongs in HELL

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
i had a dream where i turned back into a child and had to run away and escape from seiga with my two younger brothers, we were trapped in a weird sewer cellar of hers.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773560
That's exactly how she gets you. Wearing that silly name, making you think she's just a cute old lady, lowering your guard and then BAM! You're balls deep in her evil hermit pussy without even realizing it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773560
Its a title actually, its a Chinese word for high consort/goddess.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773123
And what is that reason? There are at least ten untouched shotas not counting lesser Youkai!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45780451
I don't know why but I want to see her interact with the TF2 Spy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
I know that you are reading this thread, Miss Nyan-Nyan. You getting banned from the Council is total bullshit. You can come over to my place to vent at me about how hypocritical and stupid the other hags are. I'll get whatever alcohol or drink you enjoy. Also you're such a pretty woman, I would have mistaken you for a youngster! Hahaha. I'm also underaged.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45782226
This anon's pelvis was never the same again, and his penis was never found.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45779487
>high consort/goddess.
Neither of those fits her

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773560
niang-niang...

[Anonymous No.]

>>45779334
I'm balls deep in her evil hermit pussy on a daily occasion and I honestly don't see what the problem is. It's pretty great to have someone who helps you satisfy your urges every night and cuddle afterwards. Plus Seiga is nice enough to always cook something for me in the morning, for lunch and dinner. The only downside is that I've gotten her pregnant multiple times because apparently using protection is against her religious beliefs or something so she's pregnant most of the time rather then not hahahaha. Well I've grown to like those little brats so it really isn't as bad as I imagined it to be

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
I would like to lodge a formal complaint against Mr. Original Poster.
All the text present in his post is plagiarized from a post I've made on a hag thread some months ago.
I request not less than five(5) pretty images of Miss Nyan Nyan as damages for all the suffering someone copying my mediocre work online has done to my wellbeing; should he fail to comply, he shall be given to the hag council as "Communal Husband" and be forced to listen to them gush about old timey musicians and soap operas, plus bear the whining about all their health problems, how fat they're getting and how much their backs hurt lately, all the while providing regular massages and cellulite cream applying (fate worse than death.)
Answer with haste please.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45782637
Truly a fate worse than death

[Anonymous No.]

>>45782637
Imitation is the greatest form of flattery after all.

[Anonymous No.]

I know Seiga is 'evil' and that she's a 'terrible person' and that 'Yoshika is suffering having the fetus she gestates extracted for taoist magic' and all, but hear me out. Seiga would be a great wife and mother to your children, she left her old family on great terms and loved them dearly. All she wants to do is practice taoism, teach others, and impress you with her powers. All she really wants in a man is someone that can make her laugh, ignore her crimes against nature, and let her be herself. She's a good women, really!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45785495
Anon, I...

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773511
Yukari needs to get her damn fox under control. It's bringing shame to our credibility and I still haven't had a turn! I will break the no B-word rule if I have to!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45785658
what am i looking at, abortion?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45790144
She uses dead fetuses (god knows where she gets them from) as danmaku.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
How must it feel to be preyed upon on by big milfs?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45790159
somewhat heavy

[Anonymous No.]

>>45785658
I love this woman but I am not bringing this kind of energy home to introduce to my ma and pops.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773511
An interesting loophole. Fuck the shotas by impersonating another hag and bypass the quota!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45785495
Clearly one must mating press her into insanity.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773340
Young girls don't count! It's "romance"!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45790265
And this EXACT kind of thinking is why I proposed motion #11 "Extend shota quotas to the general populace of Gensokyo".
Every time, every single damn time that damn Tanuki would throw a fit and convince everyone that this would be a step too far for the Council, and shot it down without so much as an amendment.
But just you wait. Once I put this evidence of overreach by the underlings of the Councilladies under the Chairgirl's nose, it's over for you, you youthful wenches.
We waited fair and square for this role, why should we be the only ones to be restricted by it?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45790250
And yet Ran chose to dress up as the one hag who has most definitely surpassed her quota many times over.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45790301
Isn't it obvious? That damn Tanuki is busy doing
https://rule34.xxx/index.php?page=post&s=view&id=7140126
She's already marking all the shotas as hers!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45791180
Since the quota requires the hags to "prey" on them. Is it really preying if they're the ones coming to you for sustenance?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45790150
What the fuck?

[Anonymous No.]

Wouldn't it be a limit instead of a quota? Quotas are something you're required to do, limits are the amount of a thing you're allowed to do.
How does one get into trouble for going over a quota? Why is there a quota in the first place?
This notice seems fishy...

[Anonymous No.]

Contrary to common belief, hags dont chase after shotas. They make one young man, generally 16-25 year old, their objective and spend their entire life with him.

[Anonymous No.]

If she likes you she will hang out with you until she gets bored then leaves.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793181
So what this is saying is that I should invest in a cardboard box. Got it.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793181
Because she never really cares enough for anybody to stick with them, one must imagine how terrifying and sickly evil a yandere Seiga could be.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
I've heard she tells people she's 16 years old
the council decided ages ago after very intense debates that they would use 17 as the age damn it

[Anonymous No.]

>>45782637
Well, looks like it's over for us /jp/. Get ready to enjoy days upon days of watching the same soap opera, sometimes the same episode over and over because one of the members of the council fell asleep and another one didn't have her hearing aid enabled. Of course, it wouldn't be as dreadful as it is, were it not for the awkward ambiance, between any one of the hags whispering to you some rather indecent things they'd do to the actors of the soap opera, or perhaps even you, as you're quite the handsome little boy, but you can't exactly respond by whispering back, because, you know, hearing aid and all that, so you speak up and eventually get scolded by the one hag that was invested in to the soap opera instead of napping or talking to each other about how you sure were nice to bring along some sweets but they wish you'd make yourself useful by helping them untie these bothersome bras that they don't have the energy to wear anymore, or massage their tired back or feet. Get ready for an endless river of complaints about the food being served. Too healthy? That won't do, why are you serving them this borderline hospital food? Treat them better, will you? Too tasty? Well now you're just being inconsiderate. You've been told at least 3 times this week that Okina's been trying to get rid of her love handles. It's entirely your fault for cooking a chicken with a bit more butter than usual, rather than Okina's sedentary lifestyle.
So yeah, long story short, next time, think about your options and just indulge in the sweet sage's desires. Post her pretty face, and once she visits you and asks you to put this cute little piece of paper on your forehead like her rotten looking friend she carries along, say yes!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45782637
>>45793270
Well, who exactly are the members of the Council? Maybe it wouldn't be so bad if I get paired up with someone like Yuyuko...

[Anonymous No.]

Thank god hags aren't real and can't hurt me

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793450
I'm not scared, I simply cannot lose to hag pussy.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793470
last words of the man who lost to hag pussy

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
>Preying on shotas after her quota has been met
What the heck? There's a quota? NO shota should be harmed ever! Total hag eradication!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793470
I'd lose immediately and every thoughts I'd have afterwards would be loving and pampering my hag wife. The only thing keeping me safe is the fact that they don't actually ex

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793313
You don't get it anon, the punishment is being a COMUNAL husband.
For every nice, quiet, slow afternoon you spend eating sweet treats with Yuyuko, you'll have another day of listening to Yukari's whines, dealing with Okina's lazy ass, doing unpaid labor at the Moriya shrine or, god forbid, testing one of Eirin's new drugs.
It's a hell the Yamma would not inflict upon even the most vile souls...

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793755
>COMUNAL husband
They take turns pissing and shitting on him?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45792825
Colloquially, yes. But I've seen "quota" used for "limit" all the time in legal documents.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45792825
Your coworkers normally give you shit for going over quota because that just makes management set the next quota even higher.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793695
Can't lose to hag pussy if they lose to human cock first. None of them has ever had a real man before.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45794281
Man I miss Tukiwani

[Anonymous No.]

>>45785658
me on the right

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793150
Ah yes, I can't wait to be some old lady's bone hug pillow for eternity.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793270
What happens if the communal husband starts to favor one hag over the others?
What if it's blatant?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45795240
The secret is to keep it off the books. In Kanako's case, she'll just tell the other hags that I'm Sanae's boyfriend.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45793755
The worst part is if you ever ask for sex (which is a totally normal thing for a husband to ask), they start blushing like crazy and smacking you repeatedly, calling you a pervert.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45795254
Kanako: Sanae's boyfriend
Yukari: Butler/litterbox cleaner
Byakuren: Devout vase polisher
Eirin: Test volunteer
Yuyuko: "Gardener"

[Anonymous No.]

>>45795328
Yuyuko proving once more why she's the best young lady by pioneering the husband monopolization techniques decades ago.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45794386
it fucking sucks that he basically used touhou for all his shit doujins and right as he actually got good at drawing stopped doing it entirely
at least he did one keine doujin (I wish it got translated though) with his newer art and he sometimes gets commissions to draw it

[Anonymous No.]

>>45795025
Eternity?
There's only one gal who's capable of that anon.
Don't make promises you aren't prepared to keep now!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45785495
She can break me

[Anonymous No.]

>>45795328
>Devout vase polisher
>Test volunteer
lmao

[Anonymous No.]

>>45808018
The solution is stick to a hag that has a light at the very far end of the tunnel, not one that gives you existential horror past the heat death of the universe.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45795254
Poor Kanako is gonna have her husband stolen the second he walks into the shrine and interacts with this seductress. Again.
Does she really think her outdated and corny attempts at flirting will work the twentieth time? Magazines are not a good replacement for experience! (Which she has none.)

[Anonymous No.]

>>45808949
I don't think Kanako has much to worry about. Most men would be put off by Kanako quickly, so any that would stick around after any period of time would have to be very strange. It wouldn't be surprising if they didn't have interest in Suwako at all...

[Anonymous No.]

>>45795328
Junko: Replacement son #274
Kasen: Trainee
Okina: Willing(?) brainwashed servant

[Anonymous No.]

>>45808949
That's gross suwako

[Anonymous No.]

>>45816016
Checks out. I'm super into Kanako, and am pretty strange.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45808949
So does this mean that in order to court the Suwacky i have to pretend to be interested in Kanako? I don't like doing cruel things that, but maybe if I tell Kanako ahead of time we can arrange something... crap that assumes Kanako could keep a lie going from Suwako... I know Sanae would help me at least, maybe.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773340
Can confirm, the Moriyas have an almost monopolistic dominance over the untouched shotas of Gensokyo.

[Anonymous No.]

Seiga is the pinnacle of a sexy evil woman and I wish she got more attention in art and doujins.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45828986
Oh my.
Well, you know what they say, crazy in the head, crazy in the bed.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45828986
MOOOOOOOOOODDDDDDDSSSSSS

[Anonymous No.]

>>45830070
Good thinking, no one deserves to miss Seiga's unhinged paizuri

[Anonymous No.]

>>45808949
Kanako would be too busy with spreading her worship and working on big projects to entice people to worship and rely on her. She won't give her hubby enough affection and would be too tired for sex. Hell she won't even have time to make him food. And then the golden goddess makes her appearance. First by using her 2000+ years of experience to cook up the best food ever. Then she talks to him. Then she lets him vent at her about his marriage. Then she comforts him. Then she comforts him again, but this time his pants are off. The moment her tongue touches his cock is when his eyes roll back into his head and he forgets all about his wife. Damn this makes me want a Suwako NTR story.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45795328
Ran: Apprentice/fuck toy

[Anonymous No.]

>>45830593
Im not an NTR guy but that does sound great. Kanako clearly doesn't give a fuck about her hubby so Suwako is taking her chance.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45830923
Bold of you to assume this has anything to do with neglect or love and isn't just a way for Suwako to fuck with her fellow goddess.
Men have no value on her eyes unless they're already taken, truly a wicked deity.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45830976
Why does this make her so much hotter.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45830593
I always imagined Suwako as more of a wingman to Kanako's suitor. Kanako would probably try to avoid going out on a date with some lame excuse, like needing to check on the geyser center. Suwako would insist on doing it in her stead, playing dumb, to both put Kanako in an uncomfortable situation, and give the comparatively young goddess some much needed experience.
Suwako has been around a long time and probably doesn't have much interest in playing these tedious games herself, but influencing things like this would make for an easy laugh.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831339
A wing(wo)man so good she winds up cucking Kanako without even intending to. Which amuses her. ''Oops, I made him fall in love with me.''

[Anonymous No.]

STOP TALKING ABOUT THESE HARLOTS!!!
This is a safe place for young ladies who are looking for men who aren't attracted to youthful bodies.
T-they're whores anyways!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831363
You just posted the biggest whore in Touhou though.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831386
That's not Reimu, though.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831386
Yes, women like Suwako and Tewi are whores, unlike the beautiful young lady present in this picture.
What if she can't get a man? That's their fault for easily falling to these skanks!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831410
true! we should only go for elegant and dignified ladies, like Remilia

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831495
Wrong kind of lady, anon.
Maybe after another 500 years she'll cakeify and be allowed in, but as it stands she knows nothing of the struggle that such elagent young women as Yukarin and Yuyuko face each day.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831518
ah right, i forgot that at least 500 years of celibacy was a requirement for joining the club.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
Nice try Seiga but we know nobody would touch you, even if they were forced.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831495
Where the hell is this remi outfit from?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831363
Tewi my beloved

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831363
Eugh... talk about un-ripe fruit. Not a single curve to be seen.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
>preying on shotas

This is horrible. Non-human women do this? We need to exterminate them so that gensokyo's shotas are free and safe from such evil women.

[Anonymous No.]

It's so unfair the dignified, powerful and elegant ladies of the land need to band together in order to attract handsome gentlemen while all these child-like harlots can just pick up seemingly any man off the street, don't they know the bachelor needs to approach the bachelorette first and not the other way around? Truly, the old ways are lost with this generation!
The worst are the fairies, I heard they take a different lover per day! Horrible, just look at this whorish specimen in the attached picture! What kind of man would like this...
Perhaps showing more cleavage will help...

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831810
Pretty sure it's from CoLA

[Anonymous No.]

>>45830593
If it's like that then this is easy, it's a cut and dry victory if that's the case.
Massaging her weary body after a hard day's work, cooking her meals tailored to her preferences to fuel the next day's work, slowly making her daily routine more and more dependent on me. By the time she catches a break, her body is already well trained to my hands, and the Eientei brand "spices" for that evening's dinner has begun taking effect. If Kanako is too tired, then it's my duty as her husband to help her relax and get fueled up. Soon jealousy of Suwako and her desire for her own divine bloodline will outweigh her workaholic nature. What is a few years off to a venerable Goddess? And there will be plenty of hands to help raise the fruit of your efforts.
You have to let things cook, have patience for your work to pay off.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831651
I would. I would so hard. I would things that are beyond what normal people would to her.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831933
I want her as my nee-chan.

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

[Anonymous No.]

>>45860514
Seiga's fat saggers

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831933
Immortals don't think like humans do. When you're a few thousand years old there's not much difference between 8 and 80. Except that one is significantly less on guard about strange ladies who want to lure him away somewhere private.

[Anonymous No.]

Seiga is a married woman, you know. You shouldn't badmouth someone's wife like this, calling her a pedo or someone who does unwholesome things with fetuses.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45861609
I bet she gets off to being called a pedophile.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45861609
WAS a married woman. Then she faked her death and ditched her family.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45790150
>where she gets them from
They're her own fetuses from all the unprotected sex she was in the human village. She gets pregnant waits a bit then aborts the child so she can use it as danmaku.
This woman is SICK!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45867989
I can fix her. It's fine.

It can fix her.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45868114
pictured here: Anon "fixing" her.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45861609
Seiga scored and none of the other hags ever will.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45868483
Yukari can score whever she feels like. She just doesn't because she doesn't want to, it's not like she's afraid of rejection or people finding out she's still a virgin. She just has more morals than someone like Seiga.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45868511
Shut up Yukari, I haxxed your're webcam
It's yakumover.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45868822
nice try, but Yukari has employed a powerful shikigami to protect her computer. theres no way you can get past Bonzi Buddy!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45868865
>Touchscreen
Just like a real 17-years-old!

[Anonymous No.]

>>45868458
I didn't say it would be easy...

[Anonymous No.]

This book is called Yoyakusuchi jokuhen

This book contains instructions for making medicines that were commonly used in folk medicine in ancient Japan.


Manufacturing method

1. licorice is added, the lid is closed with a round piece of wood, and the gaps are filled with beeswax.
2. It is filled with human feces and left for a month before being taken out and dried.
3. This is 人中黃 made from human feces.
4. It is mainly eaten when suffering from illness.
In addition, a fetal head, human saliva, urine, roundworms, head dandruff, and an infant's skull were also included

Sounds like Seiga concocted this medicine.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45873172
https://rmda.kulib.kyoto-u.ac.jp/item/rb00005656#?c=0&m=0&s=0&cv=0&r=0&xywh=-361%2C-910%2C7199%2C6138

[Anonymous No.]

>>45868483
Junko scored too, and the divorce wasn't her fault unlike Seiga.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45874306
hence why shes banned from the council too. not to mention the numerous danmaku battles she has initiated, due to the other members getting too handsy with her "new son".

[Anonymous No.]

>>45873260
ayyy thans for the link anon

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024
Did she really do all that or are you just framing her in a negative light

[Anonymous No.]

>>45773024

[Anonymous No.]

>>45831363
this bunny abused me :(

[Anonymous No.]

>>45903567
nonsense

[Anonymous No.]

Is she on the council?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45916280
Yes, and she's part of the same group as Junko and Seiga who regularly exceed their quotas.

[Anonymous No.]

What kind of mommy do you want anon?

[Anonymous No.]

>>45916529
Options are:
The Loving Byakuren
The Tolerant Letty
The Peaceful Sleep Doremy
The Housekeeper Yakumo Ran
The Age Regression Seiga Nyan Nyan

I'll pick the housewife fox. It's just a better deal.

[Anonymous No.]

>>45916529
>>45916701
For me, it's Byakuren.