/jp/ - Otaku Culture

[Anonymous No.]

Well, konnichiwa there!

[Anonymous No.]

O hi there

[Anonymous No.]

Fuck you cockhead !

[Anonymous No.]

Go back to /b/.

[Anonymous No.]

God fucking dammit.

[Anonymous No.]

Man, now we'll never know how this was going to end. THANKS A LOT, REPORTFAGS.

Hey, EFG, if you're reading: Try doing this in /tg/ next time. /touhou games/ is practically its second title.

[Anonymous No.]

You lost to Icicle Fall on Easy. You have no place here. Go back to /b/.

[Dolor !Du1A6pui8g No.]

I'm sorry, but I don't understand Chinese.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241246
>>2241255
What do you mean "back to /b/"? I've never even been there before.

Don't you see who I am? I'm Reimu Hakurei! The shrine maiden!

[Anonymous No.]

I remember that guy from /v/.

Good times.

[Anonymous No.]

That's right.
Reimu.
HA
KU
REI

The armpit miko. The undead zombie. Or whatever you prefer to call me.

And I'm on /jp/. Just how I always am. Nothing unusual here.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241271
In that case, I've found some really incriminating pictures of you!

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241271
show your armpits then!

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

Reimu-chan, Reimu-chan, why are your eyebrows so long~?

[Suigin !YUsuiginy. No.]

I fucking love roleplaying *sucks a million dicks* *fucks reimu in the ass*

[Pygmalion !rNk8s6TM.Q No.]

No.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241564,1
Spoilers: YOU are the reason why the reportfags exist. Every time you complain about a reportfag you inflate their E-penis.

Attention is a double headed snake. It doesn't matter if it's good attention or bad attention. The second you acknowledge an Internet troll's existence, he's already won. I should know, seeing how I've trolled numerous times in order to receive reactions.

[Anonymous No.]

Drawfag thread? Because Dan Kim isn't enough!

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241306
*kicks Suigin in the balls* *grabs dick* *performs dynamic entry from behind*

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241292
If you're Reimu, then let's see you dodge... THIS!
Easy Modo 「Ｓｉｎｇｌｅ Ｂｕｌｌｅｔ」

[BOOF !!UJY4ECzD9Eo No.]

>>2241318
i miss dan...

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241301
Look fast. SEE? Nice and shaved! Just like miko's armpits should be.

[Anonymous No.]

Dan-like drawings ;_;

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241334
But she doesn't need to dodge it since she has 3lives and 2 continues, so it doesn't matter.

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>2241351

You are now listening to the collective sounds of /jp/'s cocks blasting off all at once.

[Suigin !YUsuiginy. No.]

>>2241323
*uses aikido to throw you to the sun*
*fucks his entire anime loli harem (100% japanese)*
I'm truly the best person in the universe

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241351
no hair, no pit fuck

[Ararara... No.]

>>2241292
You are a guy with wig, wearing detached sleeves, and putting a big ribbon.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241361
Can't let you do that, infidel.

[Anonymous No.]

knock knock

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241375

[Anonymous No.]

What's going on here?

[Ararara... No.]

>>2241351
Oh my gosh, its..
*BWARGHH*

[Geo Stelar !SBMf3M0LKQ No.]

Posting in troll thread, etc...

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241387

[Pygmalion !rNk8s6TM.Q No.]

>>2241372
Use this next time.

[Anonymous No.]

You trolls be posting in a nigga thread

[Suigin !YUsuiginy. No.]

haha this thread is fucking bad

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241391
But I prefer the Phoenix Wright picture.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241375
Oh shit, OH SHIT!

It's /b/! They came back after me! I just KNOW they came back after me! OH GOD, SOMEONE HELP ME

[Anonymous of Croatia !na1byG1GU. No.]

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUCK I WANT TO SEE THE END!!!

[Suigin !YUsuiginy. No.]

>>2241418
hide here
http://gaiaonline.com/

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241418
Tell them you're not here. That always works.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241418
hide under the desk!

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241431
Yeah, remember the last time when we..no, that didn't work.

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>2241418

If you really are the Shrine Maiden of Paradise, a few /b/tards should pose no threat!

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241418

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241418
Get behind me.

I will cover you.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241431
I will hide, and you tell them I'm not here, got it?

I mean, of course I can just beat those /b/tards with my powers, but I JUST came back from saving the world again and I am too worn-out.

[Ararara... No.]

This is getting good..

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241418
Nah, if it was /b/, they would have just burned the door down or something, not politely knocked.

[Ararara... No.]

>>2241456
Why would /b/ coming to get you, Reimou ?

Did you steal some money for donation or sumthing? just kidding..

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>2241456

Oh, fine. I forgot, you humans are so easily run down.

It's probably just Marisa anyway, have you considered that?

[Geo Stelar !SBMf3M0LKQ No.]

>>2241442
Seconded.
I'm kinda bored and my leg muscule's out of it's place, so I guess I shall lurk this for a while.

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>2241472
>>2241472

Everyone wants a piece of the miko.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241456
There's only one thing left to do, Raymoo.

Search your feelings, you know it to be true.

[Anonymous No.]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!

[Anonymous No.]

Stop roleplaying or else I'll tell moot.

[Anonymous No.]

So did I tell you guys about the time I tried anal beads with my girlfriend?

We had been going out for a few weeks, and she had told me she was an experimental type. So anyway, she invites me to a hotel one night, and when I get to the room she's in, I see a bottle of lube with some anal beads. She tells me to rub her ass up with the lube. So she lies down with her ass wriggling, and I rub the lube around it. She then tells me to put the anal beads in, so I do so, each one going in smoothly. So after that, she asks me to fuck her, and I do so, and we're having a good time for a little while, and she then asks me to pull the beads out. However, she doesn't specify to pull them out S-L-O-W-L-Y, and I pull the end like I was rip-starting a lawnmower.

She yelps in pain after I get it all out, and there's a shitty smell coming from the anal beads. Her ass pulsates like some kind of anime demon egg for a few seconds, before shit starts practically gushing out of it, all over my dick and onto the bed. Lucky for me I had taken my clothes off, so I only got shit on my dick and a little on my legs.

I'm just sitting there in disgust, the shit slowly sliding down my dick and into her pussy, and she's all "That fucking hurt you jackass!" .

I'm just about ready to throw up, so I just pull out, with some shit still in her pussy, and going around to her face, I slap my now rapidly shrinking dick in her face, and wipe the other side of it on her back before she can react.

I wipe off what's on my legs on the edge of the blanket, and she screeches in horror, like a banshee in an old horror flick.

I just say "This is over." while putting on my clothes, and getting the fuck out of that room.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241480
CWC?Is that you?

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241456
don't worry
/b/ got told >>>/b/123435772

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241478
Go graze a wall of dicks, snitch.

[Suigin !YUsuiginy. No.]

i had a dream one time that i woke up and went to school but when i got to school there was a giant orgy and everyone was like WE'VE EBEN WAITING FOR YOU BRO COME JOIN US

and i'm like OKAY but then a giant penis monster came out of nowhere and i pulled an assault rifle of some kind out of my back pocket because i like to keep one handy at all times, and i gunned it down, but it turned out it was just my penis getting a hardon and everyone was like OH MY GOD YOUR PENIS

but this bitch came up and said DONT WORRY I KNOW WHAT TO DO and then my penis wsa better and we all fucked till noon when we went to ihop for free pancake day, then a giant dragon made of smoke showed up and i killed it but some guy was like dude calm down its just a joint and im like oh okay let me hit that bro and then i disappeared and ended up in this forest where i was running and running and i saw george bush but he was acting like chirs2balls and that was freaking me out so i jumped into the marshmallow river and swam out to pepto bismol lake and lived happily ever after with the 6 chicks who never got off of me from the orgy

but then we got nuked and i woke up on the floor

[Ararara... No.]

>>2241476
Spare me her left armpits

>>2241475
!!?

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>2241478

Why bother? Everyone on /jp/ roleplays. We have a tripfag for every Touhou, and even some unrelated trips who roleplay extensively.

Even Anon roleplays(as himself).

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>2241492

I don't want any.

[Anonymous No.]

/b/umstead

[Anonymous No.]

...AAAAAAAAAAHH!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241485

Go eat a wall of dicks. I really hope you get range banned for constantly making those /jp/ threads on /b/. It only gets the thousands of curious newfriends that make up the place to come here.

[HelenXonpool !a0yHhBwvus No.]

>>2241470

Ah! I knew I'd seen you somewhere before the whole nuns and spiders from Mercury thing started.
Proud graduate of the Ogasawara school of burger dismemberment. PhD of two-handed style. Well done.

[Anonymous No.]

If Midna was teased by someone, what would you do?

Yeah... I would have hell a lot of fun kicking his ass : starting by doing a CHI NO KATA (attack to the neck), followed by a KERI (punch) below the sternum. Then let him recover from those two respiratory system damaging attacks... Then the Koppo Jutsu begin (bones breaking technique), I would walk toward him confidently and let him grab my cloth... and then perform the technique i'm specialize into : a Onikudaki (tradition : crushing the demon). So at this point of the fight, he got his - lets say - right arm completely crushed. I would profit the fact that he's crying from pain to grab his left hand and perform another breaking technique (I don't remember the name... shame on me Sensei) which would break and twist his wrist and if i'm lucky, his elbow and shoulder. Immediately after, I'd lift his broken arm to give the deadly blow : a very powerful punch in the underarm causing a big artery present there to pierce. Before leaving i'd use a Shako Ken (claw hand) on the temples to damage his optic nerve. And maybe profit that he's lying on the ground to break one leg or two (easy thing to do). Then bow to him while saying: «Domo arigato gozaimashita» (thak you very much for the training). «So Midna, do you enjoy ? » and walk away.

[Anonymous No.]

So my friends came over to my place, we were about to irl roleplay some touhous, and this one jackass cosplaying Alice whips out a large flask and gulps half of the thing down. I'm not sure if anyone else saw it, but things got pretty bad.

It all started innocently enough; we were having a tea party and out of then out of the blue, Marisa spilled his tea all over Alice's dress. It was an honest mistake, but that wouldn't matter. Alice was fucking wasted, he took a swing and caught Marisa in his lower jaw. Blood was pouring from his mouth. The rest of us watched in disbelief as Alice squated over a now barely conscious Marisa. And took a shit. All over him.

At this point I had ran back inside, grabbed my BB Pistol (It's pretty real lookin) and hauled ass back to the tea party, everyone else had left and Marisa, now lying on the dirt, half coved in tea, half covered in leaked poop, either in shock or otherwise I was unsure. Alice jumped out of the bushes, ran towards me but just couldn't make it; for his dress was caught on a branch and he was drunk as fuck, right next to a humungous truck in a two-car garage.

I called the cops and that bitch got sent straight to jail, in the end Marisa never came over to my house again and that was the last time I ever saw him.

The moral of the story: Roleplaying makes you a jackass.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241585

Weak anyway.

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>2241504

Quite a few people failed to make the cut for various reasons. I remember one particularly horrifying incident in which an undergraduate tried to use the Kanto Plain Double-Patty No-Chew technique and choked on someone else's vomit.

...

Did I say horrifying? I meant it was hysterical.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241475
OH FUCK OH FUCK OH FLIPPITY FUCK

REIMU YOU'VE GOT TO STOP HER I'VE GOT A WIFE AND TADPOLES TO FEED OH GOD OH JESUS NOT TODAY WHY WOULD THIS HAPPEN TODAY

[Ararara... No.]

>>2241501
Then freaky interspecies sex? Nyum

[Anonymous No.]

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON? LET GO OF ME! WHY ARE YOU YELLING? WHY ARE YOU TAKING ME TO /jp/'s BATHROOM?!

[Anonymous No.]

It sure is /b/ around here

[Anonymous No.]

You will never believe what happened to me this morning! I was waking up and doing my morning routine, eat breakfast, take a shower, brush my teeth, that sort of thing. When I was about to get changed, I saw something in my window that looked a little strange. I went to look and there he was, a man was staring through my window on a ladder!

Just as soon as he knew I saw him he started climbing down the ladder and I ran for the door outside. On my way out I grabbed the bat I keep under my bed. When I got outside I saw him running down my block and I began chasing after him. We ran for nearly 10 minutes and reached some woods. Then from there we ran another 15 until I lost sight of him.

Lost, in the middle of the woods, chasing a peeping Tom. I knew something like this could only happen to me.

The search seemed over when a bit deeper in the woods I heard the man scream. I ran out there and saw him sitting on the ground a good distance away from me. As I got closer I could see he had gotten his foot stuck in a bear trap! Actually I'm not so sure it was a bear trap because it was a bit smaller but you get the point. I walked up to him with my bat and said the sweetest one liner I could think up on the spot.

"Game over loser" and I hit him in the face with my bat. He began to sob a bit as he held his bleeding nose, but to my surprise he began to laugh. This startled me so I hit him again and said "what's funny ******!" and he said, "read the first word of all the last paragraphs."

[Arcueid Brunestud !ARCIkc4cG6 No.]

>>2241528


It...it looks like...

...it looks like you're about to experience 9.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241528

We don't have a bathroom, we have a trough.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241528
Reimu where are your pants I can see all the way up there that is immodest

Also why are your legs so hairy

It is an unusual thing

[Anonymous of Croatia !na1byG1GU. No.]

>>2241564,5
If take it easy is supposed to be the end then it's a very disappointing one.

[Anonymous No.]

SPLASH

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241553

C-C-C-COMMBOO BREAKER!!

[Your Candid Fr !eND/xfY3lY No.]

It kind of sucks how you can only report a thread once.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241323
>>2241418
>>2241425
lol.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241564,6
I put the Take it Easy there, I am not sure why EFG stopped after that. I feel kind of bad about it in retrospect

Also the Yoshinoya rant

[Anonymous No.]

What the fuck happened here

[Anonymous No.]

Oh, I didn't know I could actualy bump posts in the archive.

[Anonymous No.]

>>2241564,8
Oh, don't feel bad, I didn't stop because of you. I just couldn't think of anything else (plus, I got tired of drawing), so I left to play Touhou 12. Take it easy.

[Anonymous of Croatia !na1byG1GU. No.]

>>2241564,11
Make a new one.