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/jp/ - Otaku Culture

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9769450 No.9769450[DELETED]  [Reply] [Original]

ITT: We improve the /jp/'s brides list.

1) Milk, she will cosplay for you and let you crossdress near her
2) Fukune, she will defend you from bullies and talk about cute anime, and post in every thread you make, she will also bake for you
3) Moetron, she will give you her collection of moetron images, she will also bear you 8 children
4) sparky4, she will love you so much it's CRAZY AND SHOCKING!!
5) Brian, his GET script will be available to you and he will make /jp/ related flash games and videos for you
6) ZUN!bar, he will become your roommate and you and him will be the broest of bros taking it easy all day

>> No.9769461
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9769461

You'll have to make some kind of downside to the ZUN!bar choice to make the others seem more desirable.

>> No.9769465

Sion will share his shitty anime's folder with you and suck your cock
Helen will be the strong female presence in your life and bro (you won't have any sex though)
Arc will be your black homie
White Ren will act grumpy and be autistic around you

>> No.9769467

>>9769461
There's no downsides to picking ZUN!bar

>> No.9769470

Just give me ZUN!bar I don't care about any of those other sluts.

>> No.9769471

>>9769461
He will go into PTSD mode if he forges to take your pills. You have to warn him to do so everyday.

>> No.9769479

>>9769471
forgets to take his pills*

>> No.9769493

>>9769489
You will also join the 1% jewish population that actually pulls the strings behind everything

>> No.9769487

I pick Moetron so I can finally find out what things she'd do to that squid.

>> No.9769489

Jones, you will have access to his fortune

>> No.9769490

i wish boof was on that list.

>> No.9769496

>>9769490
Boof is like a downgraded version of ZUN!bar

>> No.9769504

>>9769496
BOOF is his one of his possible future selves.

>> No.9769513

Hong Meiling will scan and translate any doujin you want

>> No.9769514

...I want biology anon. Can I have him as my onee-sama?

>> No.9769522

「ロリあき」 will beg for money on the streets with you

>> No.9769527

>>9769496
>Boof is like a downgraded version of ZUN!bar
You don't know SHIT about BOOF.

Where the fuck is my Arc-sama on this list.

>> No.9769524

Saten anon will take you to the most luxurious glory holes he knows and suck your cock

>> No.9769532

>>9769527
see >>9769465

>> No.9769529

Sudo, you will have instant access to autism bux and be able to NEET it up with him

>> No.9769535

>>9769529
Tempting

>> No.9769540

wtH, he will be brought back to life and will turn /jp/ into his HELL

>> No.9769544

>>9769535
Having access to Jones's fortune looks much more tempting to me even though I'd become a kike.

>> No.9769550

None of you fucking triplosers are good enough for me, my love belongs to a nice anonymous /jp/sie

>> No.9769559

>>9769550
Which one?

>> No.9769561

Who was that old school poster that everyone used to lust after and e-stalk? Started with p?

>> No.9769569

>>9769561
ponpo?
pygma?

>> No.9769585

Which anonymous poster you are still somehow able to recognize wud u fug?

>> No.9769591

>>9769585
That one guy who always posts flan bladder leak and pantsu munch in the flanfly threads.

>> No.9769595

>>9769450
>sparky
>she
Please don't encourage his delusions!

>> No.9769605

>>9769591
I always thought that was at least 3 people.

>> No.9769609

>>9769605
In my fantasy it's one heroic person.

>> No.9769615

>>9769559
The guy who never posts and always just lurks

>> No.9769627

>>9769609
What if he has two other personalities that also posts those pictures without him knowing it?

>> No.9769719

I refuse to take sparky on the grounds that I might become terribly dissilusioned and find no more joy in my favorites things. Jones it is; all the money and influence is worth the trade-off.

>> No.9769776

>>9769719
not crazy o__O

>> No.9769777
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9769777

>>9769595
i must kill you

>> No.9769787
File: 62 KB, 485x352, crying meat.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
9769787

Poor Brian, nobody wanted to take him in the last thread either.

>> No.9769788

>>9769540
I want to turn wtH's hot as HELL ass-pussy into HELL.

>> No.9769801

>>9769787
I want Brian. What are you gonna do about it nerd?

>> No.9769795

>>9769787
FRIG OFF BULLY >:(

>> No.9769806

>>9769787
F O
R F
I F
G

>> No.9769810

Cirno Anonymous of Gensokyo, he will come back to /jp/ and post regularly.

>> No.9769817

>>9769795
HELL
>>9769801
O
>>9769806
BRIAN

>> No.9769822
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9769822

>>9769810

>> No.9769825

>>9769817
I am anonymous.

>> No.9769833

>people keeping their hopes up dead tripfags will suddenly come back from the dead
>>9769489
>>9769513
>>9769540
>>9769561
LEL

>>
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