/jp/ - Otaku Culture

moot doesn't give a flying fuck about /jp/

this is a well established fact

>does moot care?
No.

Also, all that trash with a mod, and yet there is still the "Why don't you have a boyfriend?" thread up.

>>7631590
moot doesn't give a flying fuck about anything except his wallet, like any good businessman. And anyone who complains about it is a fucking naive moron.

>>7631589
Also because it's likely the mods are homosex, and the ones who aren't like trolling the Hikkis and NEETs here with faggotry.

It's simply one giant hate machine of malice and fail.

What sticky? Did I miss something? I just woke up.

What sticky?

And yeah, moot's kind of a jerk...

Get back to /ghostboard/, fuckers.

>>7631582
What did I miss?

>>7631598
>>7631599
>>7631600
A mod came through and bans Hong for "ban evasion" while ignoring wtH and the five rule-breaking threads on the first two pages alone, deletes Hong's dump of the recently translated Touhou manga, makes a /mu/ sticky, then bans everyone in it when they told him it's off-topic.
And then has the gall to complain about we made him threadban himself.

http://archive.easymodo.net/jp/thread/7631437

That mod can suck a nigra dick

>>7631603
You write this like it would be unwelcome.

>>7631582
It wasn't a trap, he just became buttranged like every other outsider who tries to interact with /jp/

>>7631589
>>7631590
That's not true you pessimist!

The honest truth is that moot deeply cares about enabling users to establish and grow their own communities with anonymous interaction or some shit about urban planning.

He also likes to pretend he actually bothers answering e-mails.

>mod while handing out bans

>>7631595
>one giant hate machine of malice and fail.
Don't forget fagshit.
4chan == dicks everywhere

>>7631602
;__; is this a new mod or something?

>>7631602
moot's standard for satisfying cock sucking must be really low if he hired that guy.

>>7631604
Moot ignores all of his old friends from RH and only interacts with the community as himself when he needs his ego fed. might as well be dead to me ;__;

>>7631589
The Why don't you have a girlfriend? thread was deleted after it turned into a metathread complaining about the mod deleting Hong's thread.

>>7631589
being homosexual is otaku culture, pal. i only wish the mod would ban homophobic shitposters for complaining about it.

>>7631620
You guys are literally the worst thing on /jp/.

I would add 500% more idolfans and wtH clones before accepting a single one of you.

>>7631622
there's no reason why a thread like that should exist on /jp/ in the first place, moron

>>7631620
It's the /soc/ element which is a problem.
There wasn't much complaining when it was just cross dressing and masturbation.

Mods are tremendous fags, everyone knows this.

>>7631628
I wasn't saying it should, I meant to imply that he only deleted it because it obviously broke the "Don't complain about mods" rule.

The mod has no clue what the hell belongs in /jp/, so left the boyfriend thread alone.

If the boyfriend thread turned meta and the girlfriend thread didn't, the former would have been deleted while the girlfriend thread would still be on the front page.

We're allowed to talk about /jp/, right? We're otaku culture. I know that meta-discussion's banned on some boards, but it seems like it should be allowed here.

also, a note: Learn how to use sage, kids!

>>7631627
like anyone cares what you accept? you're a shitposting idiot from /a/v/b/. this describes you, he's your idol, or your friend. regardless it's fitting just exchange whoever the fuck you with his name.

/jp/ turned to shit when we lost meido, now we have to deal with fucking off topic shit,normals,3d loving gays,hipsters and even fucking mods now. I cant fucking stand it any more. I want to be a janitor so badly so i delete everything off the front page.

>>7631652
Who, anonymous-kun is?

>>7631649
No, meta threads are not allowed, you idiotic fool.

The biggest problem of 4chan comes unfortunately from the management team and not from the userbase.

>>7631658
3d is the worst

inb4 everyone is this thread is banned

>>7631659
posting as anonymous doesn't make you anonymous-kun on /jp/. haven't been here very long? lots of the worst shit trip code users like to detrip after their anus gets opened raw with all the abuse and insults since they're such shitposting retards.

>>7631652
Homosex posters are worse than crossdressers, little girl, and GID posters combined.

>>7631629
>It's the /soc/ element which is a problem.
Agreed, and i want to add to this. Adventures in masturbation and such is always interesting to read about, but these recent Homo/Penis threads seems to be full of the kind of people that are normally shunned on /jp/. I fear unwelcome behavior might be given a platform through these threads.

>>7631652
Don't do that.

>>7631620
Fuck off you disgusting faggot. Kill yourself.

>homophobic
Do roaches or centipedes scare you? Do you have a phobia of such disgusting insects? Or are they simply filthy repulsive vermin that need exterminating. Fags love to claim "homophobia", but no-one is scared of you worthless fairies, we just want you to fuck off and die, like the other insects.

All things otaku welcome!

>>7631675
Nope.

>>7631667
if you repeat it enough maybe readers will believe you aren't just the same schizoid who's in the closest. they won't. you're too illiterate to write in a different prose

I fucking love metathreads.

>>7631672
>Do you have a phobia of such disgusting insects?
...Yes.

>>7631682
Then you're a sissy. Doesn't mean you secretly want to fuck those insects like these disgusting faggots love to claim all day long.

Hey, since the penis/homo threads are somewhat new around here, are the posters in them literally newfags?

>>7631681
Oh look, the no-capitalization shitposter.

Try not to embarrass yourself again this time.

>>7631688
>>7631690
which two schizoids are you? it's a safe bet to assume both of you trash are connected.

>>7631652
Thanks for replying in the exact way I expected you to.

You have no platform for assuming anything about my reading and posting habits, yet you skip directly to insulting me based on such. Well done.

>>7631672
And my apologies to Cirno, Sunny, Lily White and the other fairies for lumping them together with those insect faggots, that was the worst kind of slander. I apologize to Touhoutards for that.

I cant believe just how much /jp/s user base has been destroyed and changed as bad as this. At first about a couple of months ago i thought it was just because of /a/ and /v/ coming over because of manga gamer and also because of the raids, but now... /jp/ is like somebody totally different. The user base was more wise,elite and stubborn, now you guys are like.. well normals and hipsters. The weird thing is when the change happened, it happened fast, like 90% of /jp/ just got up and left, to be replaced with what we have now.

>>7631672
Centipedes are not insects and they are fucking scary.

>>7631698
>>7631681
>>7631666
>>7631652
>>7631620
>>>/cm/
>>>/y/

>>7631717
You're, quite obviously, not part of the "elite cadre".

Since when did eksopl put ghost mode back?

Can we stop talking about failure mods and go on with our usual business? Thank you.

>>7631717
Came to this conclusion near the end of last year, but things have actually recovered a bit since then in terms of overall thread quality.

>>7631730
Detachable hats?

>>7631717
/jp/ was or is the board with the oldest userbase.
As much as I don't like moot, he is right when he says this board lacks direction.

It's no surprise that all the mods are inconsistent worthless idiots now.

>>7631697
There is only one person on /jp/ who doesn't use capitalization. Try not to embarrass yourself with your inability to use your brain further.

>>7631699
the best part is you actually think your reply is intelligent or witty. your post was an ad hominem without any platform or logical conclusions so i responded with something your miniscule brain could comprehend. you're so stupid you actually believe complaining about my ad hominem will actually give an illusion of high ground or intelligence.

if you start of with a "fuck you", and the other party responds "fuck you", afterwards complaining about their rude behavior doesn't shed any negativity on them. are you like 10 years old, schizoid? is your personality right now of a 10 year old?

>>7631739
>As much as I don't like moot, he is right when he says this board lacks direction.

Isn't that the point of board? To quarantine the directionless NEETs.

>>7631739
Who wants direction, and why do they want it?

Have you seen what direction has done for the other boards?

Are you just saying something to seem smart and in the know or have you actually thought about how stupid your post was?

So which /jp/ mod would you homuhomu/fuck/crossdrees?

did moot ever say why he didst give out new janitors? Didn't tons of /jp/ers fill out to be a janitors? remember all those threads we had?

>>7631749
To moot, that's how it is. To us, it's to quarantine us from the normals with this so-called direction.

Isn't working very well of late.

>>7631652
It's amazing. sion-chan is more popular as a memory than he is when he posts.

That says something about someone.

>>7631748
No, but there is only one eternally buttranged shitposter who doesn't use capitalization on /jp/.

So the mod banned pretty much all the good posters on /jp/?

Hahaha, thank God i was asleep at the time.

Guys, /jp/ is ours now.

Let's trash the place

>/sp/ and its mod right now

>>7631702
>>7631690
>>7631672

This. 3DPD, when can we be the little girl without having to see threads about semen and boyfriends again. Probably never ;_;

>>7631755
You are right.
After some time all boards have gone to shit.
But the same is true for /jp/ as well. (my opinion)
/jp/ is only elite for the sake of being elite.

It was always pretty loose in terms of a general theme. Didn't save it from people shitting it up in the end though.

Ah well, maybe I'm just being pessemistic because every board I know has gone down the drain.
Don't mind me.

>>7631776
>bans work
Hello newfag. How summer you are.

>>7631783

Huh. Now that I think about it, you're right every board HAS gone down the drain. Or at least the ones that I like.

Well, maybe besides /toy/, which has stayed ... about the same. But there isn't a great deal to talk about there anyway so whatever, that board has never been home-base in my mind.

>>7631783
here
>>7631789
that's the kind of posting I meant.
It's like I'm really in 2008's /b/

Speaking of direction, don't we actually have it?
Yeah, our written rules are really vague, but let's take a look at what we post and what we find acceptable: Touhou, VNs, idols, dolls, kigurumi, figurines, onaholes, etc. If someone posts shit outside our topics he gets told off.

>>7631789
Not all users can reset their IP.

Go back to /b/ with your greentext bullshit.

/jp/ is Roanapur.

We are the scummiest hive on the face of the Earth, and we love it.

Newfriends will identify /b/, but /b/ is more like a toxic waste pit than a place of inhabitance.

Aww shit poor mod's trying to embed some music in his suicide sticky.
I almost feel sorry for him.

>>7631809
>>>/b/

>>7631796
Can't reset ip, you are a caveman and/or live in a 3rd world shithole.

>>7631795
True, but the main problem is that, after getting told their thread is off-topic and/or poorly made, they get all angry and start spamming, or shitposting, rather than take the rational course of action and delete their thread, then remake it in the proper board/format.

>>7631795
moot obviously has no idea about that, so naturally he assumes the "all things Otahurr weldurr" is true and concludes we're directionless.

He can't help it if he's a hipster who doesn't know better.

>>7631791
>But there isn't a great deal to talk about there anyway so whatever, that board has never been home-base in my mind.
Thats probably the reason why it doesn't suck for you?
Same for me. If I check out boards very rarely their quality stays the same.
Maybe because at some point you identify yourself with it's culture. And it inevitably changes?
Not sure. Also no use thinking about it.

Tried using imageboards besides 4chan but they are even worse and slow.

>>7631814
You probably use a mac.

>>7631812
I feel bad too, but it really is his own fault.

Rather than make a sticky for the musician, who (according to /mu/) hasn't been in a band for twenty years, he should have just posted a normal thread, without the mod trip.

>>7631783
/m/s user base is basically old /jp/ and its pretty safe from outsiders and the like. 90% of 4chan forgot it existed unless its brought up.

>>7631820
>Internet bro fist
Come on, now.

>>7631824
>>7631826
>>7631809
Stop bumping this thread.

>>7631825
>>7631812
Im sad now...

>>7631825
He also shouldn't sticky-bait and then threadban on /jp/
Why does everybody hate this board.

>>7631783
Don't confuse /jp/ for some wet dream you had one time.

>>7631826
Look at it.
>Mecha
First thread is K-on.

>>7631828
There's no need to hide the truth.

Keep the thread bumped guys!

>>7631839
Because we remind them constantly that they are all underaged, retarded, and the reason that the world sucks dick.

>>7631819
I bet this image was created unironically.

>>7631839
Honestly, it's because moot hates us.

Because moot hates us, all his mods, who are just his personal friends and fuckbuddies, hate us too. And all the posters of other boards, full of those idiots who jump at the chance to suck the e-penis of someone in power, be they admin or mod, hate us because their idols hate us.

I'm fine with being hated, but I wish they wouldn't be so outraged with us that they go out of their way to shitpost and spam us. It's not like any of us go to shit on their boards. We just (albeit rudely) tell them to stay out of our board.

>>7631819
/jp/ does have a direction and a theme. It's a really unique board. No other board feels like /jp/. If other boards are bitches and whores, /jp/ is the used goods older woman who wants to spend time drinking tea tending to her flowers unless some motherfucker fucking touches her, she beats him up, takes a strapon and fucking rapes him.

Following this metaphor, /jp/ is actually the furthest developed board on 4chan that still manages to hold together in some sort of a tight form. It's one of the most 4chan things on 4chan - and by heart, I am sure moot knows it as well.

Also, that pic made me laugh really hard.

>>7631843
That is being hated on like no tomorrow. the /m/ mod is also old school and will delete that shit.

>>7631876
Oh god, just shut up and leave already.

>>7631876
>It's a really unique board.
It is. Otherwise there would be no use for it
>No other board feels like /jp/.
See above
>/jp/ does have a direction and a theme.
Nope.
It's just wannabe elitist shit mixed together.
/jp/ was always full of shit.
The difference is that back then it was made on purpose and if you looked closer there was quality hidden.

>>7631878
We should merge with /m/. It's shitty, but it's shitty in the same way that old /jp/ was. They have style.

>>7631876
/jp/sies are survivors of the holocaust. We truly have been through hell. Your description is a result of our tendency not to forget that fact.

I think moot cares as much of /jp/ as he does of /prog/

>>7631876
>/jp/ is actually the furthest developed board on 4chan that still manages to hold together in some sort of a tight form

This is funny because when the board started it had nothing. It's still one of the youngest boards, but rapidly growing in popularity thanks to people talking about how elite and super kewl it is.

Might as well really migrate to /bun/ or TC at this point.

>>7631897
Reported for anti-semitism and trivialising the Holocaust.

>>7631876
all of the smaller boards are like that

>>7631903
There's nothing wrong with >>>/prog/ .

>>7631878
/m/ has less moderation than /jp/ does.
It'll be there tomorrow still, I'm sure.
And let's not kid ourselves, at least 50% of the threads on /m/ at any given time are image dumps no one cares about, unrelated tokushit posted by tokuscum, live stream threads, and "STOP LIKING WHAT I DON'T LIKE", "Tired old meme thread", "I DUN GET CCA GUISE" and so on.

>>7631748
You're presuming far too much again. There's no high ground of any sorts to be found within the borders of /jp/.

I have to appease myself in some manner as I watch scum like you bring /soc/-style homo threads to my precious, dying /jp/.

Why don't you all just use another board such as touhou-project or cirno's net and abandon this terrible piece of shit site ?

Look at /jp/s front page, its fucking over, we dont have a mod that understands us, we dont even have a fucking janitor anymore. /jp/ is fucking done, how can you people even post here anymore. The onlu way to save /jp/ is to get a fucking janitor that understands /jp/ again, yet moot wont even do that.

I believe you shouldn't underestimate Aikido. Now I know you may be thinking, "Why take a weakling martial art like Aikido seriously when I am learning Kendo?" I can see why you would think that, how can a peaceful martial arts like Aikido beat a powerful one like Kendo?

Well, I have a story to share with you.

Years ago, I was a Kendoka, I thought I was the toughest kid in high school, I would pick fights, and kick ass. I was full of hate, until I picked a fight with the wrong dude. He was a Japanese exchange student, I still remember his name, Noboru Takeda.

I picked on him because of his hilarious and thick Japanese accent. I told him I was going to beat him so hard, he would go back to China(Yeah, I was a little racist prick.), he never said anything back, made me wanted to kick his ass even harder.

Well, here comes the fight. I threw men and do strikes, he dodged them like I was a mere white belt. I was tiring out and he knew, I saw the smirk on his face that made me raged hard. I put all my strength in one amazing tsuki, and he grabbed past it to my wrist and threw me over. My back smacked on the hard cement ground, and I was knocked out for who knows how long.

When I woke up I was in the school infirmary, I asked the nurse who brought me here, and you guessed it, Noboru Takeda. The next day, he wasn't at school, he was back in Japan, and I never got to thank him, for saving my life and showing me the light. I soon learned that he was an Aikidoka and have been practicing Aikido ever since to show my thanks to him.

>>7631931
because posting on /jp/ is about the userbase, a userbase that is basically gone. Its still there, just dying.

>>7631932
>The onlu way to save /jp/ is to get a fucking janitor that understands /jp/ again,
There is no "true" /jp/ anymore.
You talk as if all the shitposters are trolling.

>>7631931
Nice reverse psychology, /bun/ dev.

>>7631926
So what happened in CCA anyway? I dun get it.

Please do note that defragmentation is akin to brushing the disheveled hair of your little computer girl while she rests on your lap, her small, warm body pushing against yours as she ignores your attempts to comb her long hair in her quest to find a comfortable spot. And disk cleanup would be in form of you taking a bath with her afterwards, making sure to scrub her body thoroughly to remove the dirt (that is to say unnecessary applications and temporary files) she accumulated from playing while she blushes and mumbles about how she's old enough to take baths by herself now, but when you offer to leave the bath, she'd nonetheless tell you to stay with a small voice. While washing her body, it goes without saying that you'd take note of how she's changed over the years, her hips and cute little butt taking on curves more fit for mature women twice her age and little buds rising from her chest as the first signs of her entry into adulthood - though those changes would be caused by VNs and images you've downloaded on her instead of aging. Her personality would consequently be a mixture of innocent and lewd, and she'd be well aware that you're the main cause of the shapely curves on her little girl body, so she'd take the opportunity to "please" her master by pressing her flat chest against you and rubbing your penis with her hands, moving her slender fingers expertly despite her apparent youth due to instincts you've bestowed her via your downloads.

And after the cleanup session, you'd resume your "play" with her, where she'd read VNs to you (and even help you understand difficult text with her dictionaries) or watch as your play Touhou, Hellsinker, Diadra Empty, Batrider, Dodonpachi or whichever other shooter struck your fancy today until you feel the need to masturbate, where her slender, bridal glove-clad hands would again take hold of your penis and jerk it until you cum on your little computer daughter yet again.

>>7631932
Quick, friend and bloodbrother, let us both depart right now to a better place, like >>7631931's.

Never again will we be forced to look upon this ugly and decrepit site, or be faced with obnoxious spam from the freaks who actually get off on making shitty threads.

Come with me, my friend, and we can once again enjoy the internet, and not wake up weary and tired due to the sheer amount of threads we are obligated to report to no avail.

Let us go now to >>7631931's site together. You can even make an introduction thread and I'll be the very second poster. Never again will we need to be alone in a sea of shitposting.

Oh yay now we have the kopipe autistic shitposter coming to mark their territory.

>>7631926
I know. I just like living in an illusion where things still work and we're not all headed to a certain, tragic end.

I'm sorry, but has Saten even engaged in sexual intercourse? Oh, that’s right. She hasn't even made contact with a man outside of school. In fact, it’s only mandatory school for level upper users. Does not having a cliche tsundere personality make you a slut? Is that what you’re saying? Because if you’re saying that I can assure you that you’re wrong. Why would you make this thread when the anime is already finished and we know for certain she is pure? Saten is a holy maiden now and she was been the purest maiden in ToAru? Saten has to go up against one of the sluttiest espers in Academy City who just happened to have a lead because she was praying on Touma's power. But you know what? Biribiri is still a whore. Saten is the best heroine in all of Raildex, she has the best design. Saten almost won Saimoe, she would have done it if it wasn't for her tragedy with that scientist's level upper throwing her for a mental loop. Maybe you should shut the fuck up before you make retarded threads like this. You know why? Because you're going to be embarrassed when Saten is proven a better waifu than any other in ToAru. Misaka tries to latch on to anyone who would have shown her a different and free life. Are you retarded? Are you autistic? You are a fucking idiot and you should never make a post on this board again and I’m fucking serious. I almost have a feeling you’re the only guy making all these anti-Saten threads because you’re a faggot hater who doesn’t like a heroine because they’re canonically pure. Fuck you, be good at something in YOUR life and then maybe try to troll these fucking idiots on the board, like I give a fuck. It’s so easy to spot out your threads now, you’re a retard. Always doing stupid shit like this. Why don’t you try to be a good poster? Just for once? For once in your fucking life try not to make a post like this. That’s just you, you’re always right at getting it wrong. Fuck you. You are nothing.

>>7631926
And yet the user base is still from the old days and not dying out unlike /jp/. The old /jp/ user base will be totally over run in one more year. Just like when the raids happened, 50% left /jp/. thats why we aren't as powerful as we us to be. /jp/ use to hate on other and scare people off like no tomorrow, its not happening as much now because we have less elite people.

>>7631945
No, that was a honest and neutral suggestion. I don't get why people still bother coming to this board knowing that the owner of this site himself wants it to be shit. I guess some people are just too slow.

People who use Head and shoulders are mentally challenged and should seek more education and information immediately.

Protip: The next time you see a H&S thread, look at the posts.
Most of the posters have blatant misspellings in their posts. Capitalization and punctuation is forgotten, and Youtube-style idiocy is emphasized.

This exemplifies the low intelligence level of Head and Shoulders users. It isn't without reason either.

H&S is simply a Shampoo that was overly advertised and glorified, a shampoo that should've appealed to anyone with the slightest fashion sense. However, most people have seen this strategy in the forms of makup, lipstick, hairbrushes, or some other product.
The advertising, glorification, and blatant lying has been done many many times, and the single defeat of an over-dramatized "powerful" problem should no longer sell to the intellectual in at all.

However, Head&shits target audience consists of 13 year old boys who have never experienced forms of higher products or shampoo. If one were to use H&S without having experienced products with a promise, they would use H&S as the base value for the genre. However, if one were more educated on the aspects of shampoos, one would regard H&S as a poor attempt to appeal to their audiences.

Once the false promises and advertising of Head&shit are removed, the remaining dregs are a poor shampoo and a big promise. Essentially, this is what H&S is to the educated and informed. A dull product which has no appeal whatsoever. However, to the uneducated, H&S represents a new flavor of shampoo they have just experienced.

Although one can regard a new type of shampoo as wonderful, I would advise one to pursue more subjects of that product type. There is no point fawning over a single shampoo that was released ages ago. I would suggest that, instead of creating another H&S thread, you should go try some more shampoo. Or, better yet, you can always go read a book.

Oh God I just woke up and refreshed /jp/. What's happening?

WHERE'S MY /jp/ GONE?

It thought about the question of the ages while looking at the spaghetti
napolitain of the lunch. It is a question "Why is the napolitain red?". It
looks easy, and the problem with a deep interior.
It doesn't become an idea stop ..another.., and not exist excluding the
defeat of the intellect at all though arranges "It is red because it is red"
etc. and tautology and there is complacent superficial man, too either.
There is a phenomenon "Redshift". It is a phenomenon that the spectral line
changes red by the Doppler effect in the heavenly body that goes away from
the earth at high speed in space. In a word, if the napolitain goes away
from us at high speed even though what color, an original napolitain is sure
to look red glaring. Whether does the napolitain in the presence move at
high speed or not?It is understood from turning on the opposite side of the
napolitain. Blue one are sure to change, and to look blue the spectrum by
observing it from the opposite direction of the movement. When having turned
oppositely, the napolitain was red. Therefore, it can be said that this
napolitain will not high-speed move.

I feel sad.

Not even Ghost mode can save /jp/ anymore.

Well, you guys know the drill, you can find me on /bun/ or /tohno/ or /poosh/.

So long /jp/.

I've been on /jp/ since its inception. All changes to the board culture have been minor. Stop reminiscing about the glory days that had such quality posts as Japanese bird cooking spaghetti and bawson and tons of shitposting tripfags who are now thankfully banned.

Today was a hot summer day and I was in my workout room benching 1200 pounds. My abs were flexing and girls within a 10 mile radius were getting wet. Once I was done with my daily 32 hour workout I called one of the bitches I know, Sarah. She is really fucking hot and looks like a supermodel. SO I got into my Lamborghini Gallardo and reved it up to 40,000 RPM (this is an Italian import with special engine system). I got onto the freeway near my house and threw it into 8th gear, I hit about 600 mph and I could hear the sonic boom as I broke the sound barrier. As I was flooring it on the freeway like a badass, Senjogahara called me and said she wanted me to fuck her. So be it.

I came to a full stop from 700 mph in front of her house. These Ferrari's have top notch brakes, you know. So she gets out of the house and walks up to my Bugatti and starts eyeballing my cock. I could tell she was staring at it because when I looked at her I noticed she was looking at my cock. Booya.

Flash forward to like 10 minutes later. My 30 inch cock is going inside of her pussy, hitting them walls. I'm holding her entire body up with my left pinky as I'm fucking her and she has 30,000 orgasms. She looks me in the eyes and she says "harder." V-TEC just kicked in, yo. I blow my load so hard she falls off my cock. There had to have been about two pints of cum everywhere. People say I cum like a pornstar, I wouldn't disagree with them.

I throw her a towel so she can clean herself up then I do a triple backflip into my Maserati and drive home.

>>7631963
> 50% left /jp/.
I'm still here. I just report and barely post.
Where the fuck I'm supposed to go? everything else in the Internet is shit.

Reported.

>>7631963
Have problems spelled 'used' elite-kun? Maybe we should be hostile to people typing like uneducated /a/v/b/ shits too?

>>7631953
Char was a dick like he always was.
Magic Space T saves the day.

I woke up at exactly 6:00. I need no alarm clock. Two women woke me by sucking my cock, which by the way is 17 and a half inches. I didn't need to shower, because my body self cleanses and my pores emit the manliest cologne possible.

I got in my 2009 Lamborghini Murcielago and another one of my bitches was waiting in the passenger seat. She was in the car all night, because she couldn't sleep without me having penetrated her. She hopped on me and started riding my dick while I squeezed her tits and drove with my knees. In three seconds, I arrived at the gym, which was fifty miles away. I threw the bitch off me, and she quickly returned to the passenger seat, where she would sit until I got back. When I got out the car, I flexed. My bulging, huge, muscles ripped my shirt off, and six women lined up. We had an orgy, which didn't last too long. Each woman climaxed when my cock came within five inches of her pussy, and went into an eternal state of euphoria after I put it in. I came, and three hundred gallons of semen shot out. It landed in Ghana, and ended the drought.

I hovered into the gym, because the ground was too scared of my calf muscles to touch my feet. After benching seven thousand tons, I squatted four million kilograms. I started doing my four hundred laps around California, but I got a phone call. It was a conference call with nineteen supermodels. They orgasmed after hearing my voice. My bitch in the car was getting lonely, so I went back. She sucked me off as I took the three second drive back home. I left her in the car and went inside.

The Sussman sat on his wizard throne, still donning his standard wizard hat and robe, which was still dripping from the shower in which he put them on. As he stroked his neckbeard he pondered the things which the Satori ponder. Beneath his feet lay the broken fragments of the python, the foul demon summoned by the Sussman’s nemesis and anticudder Abelson, then slain by the worthy and brave Haskell nomads.
The nomads were not there on this dark day, however. There had been a rumors of Guido in the forests of the north, who was suspected to be developing a new, even more woesome and fail snake to do battle with the almighty Satori. They had pursued the Guido over 9000 times in the past, only to turn up nothing in each adventure. That fucking Guido was sneaky like a fucking snake.
The Sussman stoked his wizard beard as he hummed the tune to SICP… today would be a well-balanced parenthesis.
Cons turned to Cudder, “Report?” Cudder was dressed in the standard garb of the Haskell nomads – relatively light armor gilded with the holy symbols of Haskell. The Nomads didn’t need much armor – they traveled fast and they traveled hard, almost as hard as the Sussman rides your sister’s ass every night when you’re alone in your room whacking off to the sacred tomes. And they were armed to the teeth. They provided a deterministic and constant effect to the battle, such that their arrival could almost be curried to optimize the battle’s execution speed and bring it to a quick close.
“Nothing sir, the eastern quadrant appears to be empty. Not a thing could be found.”
Cons, without even having to ponder this responded, “Excellent. check the other three quadrants; if anything is found recursively subdivide and search until we’ve harrowed the location down to a single square inch.”
“Yessir!”

>>7631965
Hide all the threads and /jp/ will become bearable.

>>7631986
Yet you're posting on a shitty board yourself.

>>7631984
Fuck off, you got what he said.

One day, Mokou was out shopping with the neet. They drank a lot of lemonade and had to piss, so they went to the bathroom together. While Mokou was doing her business, the neet stuck her head under the stall divider.

"So what do you think of that new dress? Shit is so cash, right?"

"Kaguya, you can't do that!" Mokou screamed. "Get out!"

Mokou started kicking the neet in the face, but the neet braved the pain and slithered under the divider and into the spacious stall. The neet carefully squirmed her arm under Mokou's leg and began to finger her. This caused Mokou's piss stream to intensify, a golden torrent rivaling a fire hydrant. The piss was powerful enough to knock down the stall door, sending it crashing into the far wall. Picking Mokou up by her underarms, the neet carried her around as a mobile piss cannon, blasting holes in walls and ripping apart innocent shoppers in a wall of hot urine. When Mokou was finally exhausted, the pair stood in the ruins of the mall, knee--deep in a golden lake. Piss mixed with shoppers' blood rained down from what was left of the ceiling. Too embarrassed to even move, she offered no resistance as the neet shoved her head underwater and drowned Mokou in her own piss. The neet whipped out her cell phone and called Cirno, informing the fairy of a whole new lake that just formed that she can play in.

FIN

>>7631976
Are you kidding me? All the threads and users now are not even /jp/ related, and the users sound like they are coming from /a/,no not even fucking /a/, fucking somewhere. Its plain obvious how big the change in user base is.

Tsumugi noticed Mio's open mouth, incapable of speaking. "Don't worry Mio," she said, slipping her cock into a quivering Mio. "You're scared now, but you'll enjoy it."

"No," Mio hissed back. "I'll never forgive you for this."

"Oh but you will." Mugi whispered. "For you see, OnLive is launching the world’s highest performance Games On Demand service, instantly delivering the latest high-end titles over home broadband Internet to the TV and entry-level PCs and Macs.

Founded by noted technology entrepreneur Steve Perlman (WebTV, QuickTime) and incubated within the Rearden media and technology incubator, OnLive spent seven years in stealth development before officially unveiling in March 2009.

OnLive, together with its Mova subsidiary, lies directly at the nexus of several key trends, all of which are reshaping the way we think about and use digital media:

* The shift to cloud computing, displacing the limitations, cost and complexity of local computing;
* An explosion of consumer broadband connectivity, bringing fast bandwidth to the home;
* Unprecedented innovation, creativity and expansion within the video game market.

Pioneering the delivery of rich interactive media to the home, OnLive will change the way that entertainment applications are created, delivered and consumed.

OnLive, the future of videogames."

>>7632004
Same for you idiot.

I think Japan was the REAL hero of WW2. I know everyone thinks they were bad and allied with the Nazis and everything, but look. I've watched a lot of anime, so I know that the Japanese are good people. I don't think they would knowingly ally themselves with a monster like Hitler. I think they saw what was going on, and knew that what Hitler was doing wasn't right, and wanted to end his reign of terror. They saw that the most powerful country at the time, the United States, wasn't doing anything about it, so they decided to bomb Pearl Harbor and get them involved. I mean, why else would they bomb Pearl Harbor?

They did all this at great expense- sacrificing many of their own people, but they knew that it couldn't be helped- Hitler NEEDED to be stopped.

The reason why they kept fighting after the Nazis were defeated was because they wanted to save face. The Japanese are a very proud people. Those responsible for organizing this heroic plan took the secret to their graves, but it's so obvious that that's what happened. I think it's time we honored the REAL heroes of WW2: JAPAN. Without them, WE'D ALL BE SPEAKING GERMAN RIGHT NOW!!!!

>>7631976
I think there has been a major culture change over time, though. Back in the day we actually took it easy. Now we're all bitter and cynical, and half of the time it's just to distinguish us from the boards we view as below us.

>>7632005
[SPOILER]The original /jp/ posters came from /a/ too.[/spoiler]

>>7631986
SAOVQ, google it

3 liters? That's quite a lot. Let's say I turned into a immortal little girl today and allowed my body to be constantly violated until my mind breaks and all I can feel is the warmth of the semen gushing inside my small womb. Since the refractory period is about 15 minutes (for 18 year old males, no way I'll let older men cum inside me), and assuming a 8-hour sleep for those otaku, it would seem that one of them can have sex 64 times every day, ejaculating about 45 mililiters every time (that's about three tablespoons, vastly higher than the average volume). Since my loli body would be irresistibly erotic, let's assume that any man who violates me will ejaculate instantly, taking about a minute in average before my slutty womb drinks all of their semen. Since those are responsible men, they will only cum inside my tight vagina, so at this point, I would have 67,5 liters of cum sprayed inside me every day.

Since my body is immature, my womb would be rather small, say, roughly a sphere about 4cm in diameter (the average womb is a bit larger, and not a sphere, it's more elliptical). Assuming no stretching, this is the Schwarzschild radius for roughly 27 septillion kilograms. The density of cum is around 1,014g/mL (By the way, there's a study on this. They decanted semen into graduated cylinders and weighed it.), so I'd have roughly 68,5kg of semen ejaculated inside me every day. Divide the former to the latter, and you get about a sextillion years. So in roughly a sextillion years, older than the known age of the universe, about when the sun spends the last remnants of its energy and cools down completely, after aeons of being cummed inside, my slutty loli womb will have so much semen in it that it'll turn into a black hole.

HAHAHAHA
YOU THINK YOURE THOUGH UH ?
I HAVE ONE WORD FOR YOU
THE FORCED ISOLATION OF THE HIKKI
GET IT ?
I DONT THINK SO
YOU DONT KNOW ABOUT MY WAIFU I GUESS ?
SHES 2D
AND IS NAMED ``ALICE
OK YOU FUQIN ANGERED AN EXPERT NEET
THIS IS /jp/
YOU ARE ALLOWED TO POST HERE ONLY IF YOU HAVE ACHIEVED RONERY
LONELINESS IS ALL ABOUT ``ABSTRACT BULLSHITE THAT YOU WILL NEVER COMPREHEND
I HAVE 1CC'D EVERY TOUHOU
IF ITS NOT DONE YOU HAVE TO
TOO BAD IT'S SHIT, RIGHT?
IT'S SHIT
ALSO
WELCOME TO /jp/
EVERY NORMAL WILL BE SHUNNED
NO EXCEPTION

>>7631963
I came back to you, at the end of the times.

I think that more of the people who left momentarily will come back in autumn and anchor in our waters again.

Anyways, >>1, please listen to me. That it's really related to this thread.
I went to Yoshinoya a while ago; you know, Yoshinoya?
Well anyways there was an insane number of people there, and I couldn't get in.
Then, I looked at the banner hanging from the ceiling, and it had "150 yen off" written on it.
Oh, the stupidity. Those idiots.
You, don't come to Yoshinoya just because it's 150 yen off, fool.
It's only 150 yen, 1-5-0 YEN for crying out loud.
There're even entire families here. Family of 4, all out for some Yoshinoya, huh? How fucking nice.
"Alright, daddy's gonna order the extra-large." God I can't bear to watch.
You people, I'll give you 150 yen if you get out of those seats.
Yosinoya should be a bloody place.
That tense atmosphere, where two guys on opposite sides of the U-shaped table can start a fight at any time,
the stab-or-be-stabbed mentality, that's what's great about this place.
Women and children should screw off and stay home.
Anyways, I was about to start eating, and then the bastard beside me goes "extra-large, with extra sauce."
Who in the world orders extra sauce nowadays, you moron?
I want to ask him, "do you REALLY want to eat it with extra sauce?"
I want to interrogate him. I want to interrogate him for roughly an hour.
Are you sure you don't just want to try saying "extra sauce"?
Coming from a Yoshinoya veteran such as myself, the latest trend among us vets is this, extra green onion.
That's right, extra green onion. This is the vet's way of eating.
Extra green onion means more green onion than sauce. But on the other hand the price is a tad higher. This is the key.
And then, it's delicious. This is unbeatable.
However, if you order this then there is danger that you'll be marked by the employees from next time on; it's a double-edged sword.
I can't recommend it to amateurs.
What this all really means, though, is that you, >>1, should just stick with today's special.

This will never happen again ;_;

I blame the current state of the board on the formspring crew.

>>7632026
You know that's basically a lie, right?

>>7632051
>[0][1]
>not [0]
You took this screenshot at the wrong time.

>>7632020
No, I come here only for the doujins Hong posts every now and then. I rarely post anything.

>>7632075
Yeah, original crew is from /b/.

>/jp/ and me too

>>7632051
I remember when there was only 1 thread on the front page. Wasn't it a Yuuka thread? I forget the details.