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/jp/ - Otaku Culture


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5062456 No.5062456 [Reply] [Original]

You arrive in Gensokyo.

What do?

>> No.5062460

Play Touhou.

>> No.5062466

[x]jump in the lake

>> No.5062469

Kill Marisa and everyone who likes her.

>> No.5062472

Wake up.

>> No.5062474

Where did I arrive?
Probably die.

>> No.5062476

Find Mouko and ask her to help me guide to the human village

>> No.5062477

Do a 360 and walk away

>> No.5062479

turn 360 degrees and walk away

>> No.5062481

[x] take a big dump in the lake.

>> No.5062487

>>5062469

... yet you let Sanae live. For shame.

>> No.5062488

>>5062456
Rape them for looking down on me ;_;

>> No.5062489

>>5062456
Am I just a normal human? If so, I go live with Alice because I have a feeling that'd she never kink me out.

>> No.5062490

Get eaten by fucking youkai

>> No.5062493

GO STRAIT TO YUKA AND OFFER HER SOME POTTED PLANTS

>> No.5062494

>>5062481
depending on which lake you'll either be frozen or have a frog goddess attack you.

>> No.5062496

>>5062477
>>5062479

360 mind

>> No.5062497

>>5062487
Of course. Sanae's a good girl. I cheered her on when she tried to rid the world of that tacky umbrella youkai.

>> No.5062498

Curse myself for being powerless and male.

Gensokyo wouldn't be all that fun if you're not a girl that can fly and shoot bullets.

>> No.5062500

>>5062474
>Where did I arrive?
This is important.

>> No.5062510

>>5062500
you arrived in the basement of SDM

or on top of a bunch of flowers in Yuka's field (you crushed them!)

WAT DO

>> No.5062512

Gensokyo, despite it's small size, is a self contained biosphere, with many biomes within, ranging from the humid and temperate forest and jungle regions, to the dry and sweltering mountainous areas. Getting to know the various aspects of these regions is tantamount to survival. Also remember, as Gensokyo is relatively self-contained from the rest of Earth, many of the flora and fauna have taken on various new forms, evolving in such a way to adapt to the dangerous environment. Be wary, as you may encounter plants with prehensile tentacles that can crush your bones or leaves that can shred kevlar, or birds with prehensile tentacles that can crush your bones or leaves that can shred kevlar, or even prehensile tentacles that can crush your bones with leaves that can shred kevlar. Becoming familiar with what's dangerous and what's safe is important, and a video containing guidelines will be shown to your unit by your drill sergeant during week 4 of training.

>> No.5062520

>>5062510
i would rather land on the flowers if you say sorry enough yuuka might forgive you.

>> No.5062521

>>5062510
Oh.
Die.

>> No.5062522

>>5062510
run away and go live with Alice, because she would not kick me out.

No really, are then any doujins about people moving in with Alice and never leaving?

>> No.5062525

>>5062510
>SDM's basement
Play with Flan~... and drag Marisa along.

>on top of Yuka's flowers
Run as fast as I can, find Marisa, and make sure she's in the way when Yuka inevitably Master Sparks me.

>> No.5062527

I would take over Gensokyo, obviously.

>> No.5062531

>>5062520
lol no

>> No.5062533

>>5062525
> Play with Flan
I hope you have explosion insurance.

>> No.5062538

>>5062522
they said somewhere that alice lets people stay with her all the time but she rarely speaks to them because she is working on shanghai......but most humans would not come in the forest where alice live because it is very dangerous.

>> No.5062542

>>5062522
There's this doujin on danbooru where this guy drops into gensoukyou and visits various characters including Alice on a regular basis

>> No.5062543

>>5062538
then stalk her and follow her into the forest.
All the way home
Then force you way into her house
and into her.

>> No.5062550

>>5062538
Isn't it also said that those people who do stay don't stay for very long due to all the dolls Alice has around her house making it really creepy?

>> No.5062559

>>5062533
Precisely why I'm dragging Marisa along.

>> No.5062561

>>5062550
Pussys. I'd live with her, never pay rent, eat all her food, and leave the toilet seat up.

I'd steal stuff to. I just want to troll Alice.

>> No.5062563

>>5062498
Just ask Rinnosuke to let you work in his shop or something.

>> No.5062565

Alice confirmed for only way to survive Gensokyo

>> No.5062571

I'd get lucky and bump into something not murderous like Reimu or Marisa.

Then I'd realize I can't speak Japanese and probably end up dying.

>> No.5062573

Befriend Chen so I can join the Ran Protection Program.

>> No.5062575

>>5062565
or you could go underground and go find Parsee
her job is to guide people

>> No.5062580

>>5062571
Reimu's not murderous.

Can't vouch for Marisa.

>> No.5062583

>>5062456
[ ] Jump in the lake.

>> No.5062588

>>5062575
Assuming you can get past Kisume and Yamame.

>> No.5062594

>>5062565
I can see it now, Dozens of strangers bumming around her house, yet she won't do anything about.

>> No.5062595
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5062595

>Crushing Yuka's flowers.

If I cry and apologize, I'm sure she'll forgive me.

>> No.5062600

>>5062588
Yamame is nice......but kisume....is something horrible

>> No.5062605

>>5062594
And then suddenly, a murder mystery!

Was it the magician?

>> No.5062607

>>5062456
Leave,

But

Whoops forgot my hat!

>> No.5062642
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5062642

>>5062595
..Does Yuka even know mercy?

>> No.5062644
File: 338 KB, 866x886, 1271748971601.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5062644

Try to figure out how to get to Hakurei Shrine. Once there, give Reimu lots of donations in hopes that she will protect me from youkai. Then, befriend Suika and live the rest of my days as a freeloader at the shrine.

I think this is a good plan...

>> No.5062649

>>5062594
Nah
some will probably "leave" after a while
and when I say leave I mean they get nailed to a tree

>> No.5062652

>>5062644
....then reimu tells you both to GTFO

>> No.5062659

>>5062605
Defenitly Alice
>see Dolls in Pesudo-Paradise

>> No.5062669

So Alice, The Shrine or The lake is the general place people would go?.

>> No.5062679

Draw Pentagram with virgins blood, commit suicide in it.

Become youkai.

Have wonderful danmaku battles, and admire my little girl form.

>> No.5062717

Try to find Nitori and see if she can hook me up with a computer and internet access so I can get back on /jp/

>> No.5062721

I'd go live with Alice, assuming I can get there without dying. Eventually I'd try to buy a computer and generator from Rinnosuke. I wonder what Alice would think of my artificial intelligence program?

>> No.5062725

>>5062717
But do you remember what aya said about her in DS(though she could be lieing)

>> No.5062741
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5062741

I think if you wanted to get home, you'd have to somehow befriend Yukari, since she's the only one in Gensokyo who could get you back home. Otherwise, you're gonna have to defend yourself against the youkai...

Basically, in order to survive, you need to befriend a touhou.

>> No.5062745

>>5062717
Have fun getting up youkai mountain in piece

>> No.5062752

Bend over and let the rape begin.

>> No.5062755

>>5062741
I'll unleash my performance of Eddie Money's 'Take me Home Tonight' on an unsuspecting wonderland.

>> No.5062757

>>5062745
Don't Sanae protect and patrol the path to her shrine.

Did i spell her name right?

>> No.5062760

Conquer it. Kill touhous I don't like, make others my slaves. Then we proceed to conquer another plane of existence, then another. Multiverse is our limit.

>> No.5062762

>>5062741
The easiest way to make yukari your friend is to do what battler did to beato and slap some sense into the bitch.

>> No.5062767

>>5062725
>do you remember what aya said about her in DS
No, what did she say?

>> No.5062781

>>5062575
But parsee hates doing her job and she would really rather push your over the side than guide you.

>> No.5062787

>>5062767
That she happily drowns humans in the lake.

>> No.5062795

>>5062767
Both Aya and Hatate make mention of the Kappa's tendency to harvest 'shirikodama' (sp?), which is basically something they pull from your butt and the process involved nearly kills the human.

Or something like that.

>> No.5062796
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5062796

>> No.5062801

>>5062795
Isn't it stated somewhere that Nitori and co. use artificial shirikodama?

>> No.5062806

>>5062787
da fuck? brb touhou wiki

>> No.5062811

>>5062796
That's a silly question, my lovely Shrine Maiden.

__You____

>> No.5062819

>>5062801
Maybe. As far as I know the only in-game mention of this habit is within Double Spoiler. Touhou Kappa may not be as infamous for it.

>> No.5062822

>>5062795
I WISH FOR AYA TO PULL SOMETHING OUT OF MY BUTT

>> No.5062827

Well lets see here, depending on the location and time I land in Gensokyo, plans to take it easy will have to be put on hold. Landing in close proximity of either shrines or the human village would pretty much mean I'm safe. Landing farther in no mans land means I'll have to run fast to safety because the arrival of night means youkai are going to be out in droves, leaving me pretty much boned.

>> No.5062830

Activate latent magical powers that work properly under Touhou universe physics and take control.

>> No.5062833

>>5062822
They have strap-on's.

>> No.5062847

>>5062842
WTH does that mean?

>> No.5062848

>>5062479
>>5062477
you relize ur walking straight back into Gensokyo right. . .

>> No.5062849

>>5062827
Unless you have a light and happen to encounter Rumia, in which case you're more likely than not to survive.

>> No.5062854

>>5062848
>implying I don't know how to moonwalk

>> No.5062857

>>5062795
I'll let her know of this new method of obtaining this "shirokapa" by sucking it of a tube while blindfolded.

>keikaku.jpg

>> No.5062863

1. learn magic
2. become a touhou
3. rape

>> No.5062875

>>5062849
Rumia is a dumbass who can't see in the dark yet surrounds her self in darkness.

just saying

>> No.5062877

Just walk into SDM and have meiling slap my skull sideways.

I want to die anyway. Life is nothing.

Guys, life in gensokyo would be worse then IRL. No tech or anything, and the constant threat of youkai raids in the human village. Fuck that. Give me my quick death anyday.

>> No.5062882
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5062882

I bet if you got lost in Rumia's darkness and found her, she'd hug you.

>> No.5062889

>>5062877
Really? Thought it was more mock battles just so gensokyo stays the same.

>> No.5062899

>>5062877
>youkai raids in the human village.
Zun cannon say that most of the youkai are lazy fucks and don't really do much unless you bug them first.

Well the strong ones anyway.

>> No.5062900

>>5062875
That was my point. The light is to prevent accidents like walking into a tree or falling off a cliff.

>> No.5062905

>>5062644

Reimu doesn't offer protection for donations. She offers her body.

>> No.5062922

>>5062877
> no tech
Pretty sure the kappas have lots of fancy gadgets.

>> No.5062929

>>5062905
Aren't shrine maidens virgins by definition?

>> No.5062935

>>5062796

Why is she comparing herself to a delicious carbonated beverage?

>> No.5062936

>>5062877
>>5062889
Yeah, once you get to the Human Village life will probably be safe but boring. You can get a job as a farmer or some shit.

The hard part is surviving till you get there.
After all, youkai don't get reprimanded for killing Outsiders.
Then again, some of the characters might help you out if they see you're being attacked, like Keine.

>> No.5062937

>>5062929
Don't think it's needed.

>> No.5062938

>>5062922
but humans are not allowed where they live.

>> No.5062939

i would probably troll the shit out of Cirno, and then probably get killed, either way im probably going to die soon in Gensokyo, might as well have fun

>> No.5062943

>>5062929

Both Reimu and Sanae are sluts, everyone knows it.

>> No.5062950

>>5062922
Besides them.

>> No.5062952

Well depending on if I survive the first day in Gensokyo. I'll pretty much have to find myself having to become an apprentice in some sort of craft or trade, like smelting or farming, because most of knowledge and technology accumulated in the outside world would become pretty useless in this feudal era world.

>> No.5062954

>>5062943
Sh-shut up... they're not...

...they're wonderful, pure maidens just waiting for the right man... ;_;

>> No.5062962
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5062962

>>5062935
Because Dr. Pepper loli.

>> No.5062972

>>5062936
>You can get a job as a farmer or some shit.
Or you could just apply for a job in the SDM!
No pay, just a place to rest and you can do the work of the fairies. Who knows you might get to know Sakuya, marry, have kids, and just before dying have Remilia make you a vampire.
FUCK YEAH!

>> No.5062974

>>5062877
>no tech
That's why you have rinnosuke get you stuff from the outside world. It shouldn't be that hard to get a game library, computer, generator, and internet cable.

>> No.5062975

Fuck all the girls.

>> No.5062979
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5062979

>>5062962

>> No.5062980

>>5062943
Repeating a meme does not make it more true, you know.

>> No.5062982

>>5062922
>>5062938
Yeah, Kappa are deadly shy of humans. You won't be able to talk to one, let alone use their tech.

Nitori's an exception, but finding her will be quite dangerous, since the Kappa live at Youkai Mountain.

>> No.5062983
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5062983

/jp/, since we all know that Gensokyo is a real place, why don't we agree on a meeting place when we get there?

How about Alice's house?

>> No.5062986

>>5062954

But they're surrounded by women. They're still sluts, just for other girls.

>> No.5062989
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5062989

>>5062979

>> No.5062993

>>5062983
Have a Map?

>> No.5062994

>>5062972
but remilia make them work all day without breaks...i could not do that and i would probably curse at sakuya.....i would rather work with patchy and koa where its quiet

>> No.5062995

>>5062974
Rinnosuke wouldn't part with a single thing in his shop.
Unless you're a super-powered human, that is.

>> No.5062997
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5062997

>>5062993

>> No.5062998

>>5062983
Alice's house is probably pungent with stale odors, filled with various dolls, and a prime place for homosexual behavior...

...yeah, sounds like a perfect /jp/ meetup.

>> No.5063000

>>5062456

Try to figure out how much I drank last night. The only reliable way to pass the Hakurei border is to get smashed to the point of alcohol poisoning.

>> No.5063002

>>5062993
Wouldn't work, Gensokyo's probably constantly in flux.

Maybe if you follow a road...

>> No.5063006
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5063006

>>5062986
Fine, you can think they're sluts. See what happens when you run into them and treat them as such.

>> No.5063009
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5063009

Get trashed.

>> No.5063022
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5063022

>>5062998
Alice would probably WANT us to freeload there.

Shes so lonely.

>> No.5063023

>>5062983
Going to Reimu's donation box to put some money in. Then hanging out and drinking with Suika for the rest of eternity.

Don't know about you guys.

>> No.5063027

>>5063006

You can treat them as whores, at any rate...just as long as you have enough money, you can get at least Reimu to do anything you want.

>> No.5063031

>>5063022
Isn't it sad, Alice?

>> No.5063034

>>5063027
"What makes you think I'll have sex with you?"
"Money."
"What a lucky guess~!"

>> No.5063037

>>5062952
This is probably what most outsiders would have to do if they desire to stay in Gensokyo. I mean really, the human village is made up of decedents of youkai hunters and are constantly surrounded by monsters, I doubt any of them are going to take in a useless person who can't contribute to their livelihood. So I guess Gensyoko might cure you of your NEET lifestyle at the least.

>> No.5063041

>>5063023
Now that I think about it, just what sort of currency is used in Gensokyo?

>> No.5063047

>>5063041
semen count

>> No.5063048

>>5063041
Any. They occasionally trade with the outside world.

>> No.5063050

>>5063034

..."How much money?"
"One million."
"How may I be of service to you, master?"

>> No.5063054
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5063054

>>5063023

That's what I said! >>5062644

I'll see you at the shrine!

>> No.5063055

>>5063037
I'm not a NEET, but the jobs I prefer to do tend to involve the use of a computer anyway.

>> No.5063058
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5063058

Stop it...

>> No.5063060

>>5063041

This should answer your questions.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8TUPyvuOvr8&feature=related

The only thing that she doesn't accept is Ice Money.

>> No.5063079
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5063079

>>5063060

They just mad cuz Eye'm stylin' on them.

>> No.5063081

Bum around Mokou and Keine.

>> No.5063091

>>5063060
"You saved my life, Reimu! How can I thank you?"
"In cash."

>> No.5063093

>>5063081
Keine would make you learn about history...so i say no thank you i would rather go find koishi and play with her because she is an Extra boss and could protect me from people.

>> No.5063098

/jp/, I have a plan.

Find 100 dollars.
Have it exchanged for quarters.
Keep a bag of 400 quarters with you at all times, incase you accidentally fall into Gensokyo.

Like Reimu can tell the difference between money.

>> No.5063099

I don't have any cash on me, but still would like to donate. Does Reimu have a Paypal account?

>> No.5063108

Purposely get lost in the bamboo forest of lost. get found by mokou. ask to be taken to Eientei get on my knees and ask for a Job and place to stay. learn medicine from Eirin. learn Danmaku from Kaguya Find Nitori and get a computer and shut myself in the room across from Kaguya

>> No.5063113
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5063113

>>5063099
No, but she does have these mystical talismans that can transfer wealth spirtually. You just need to move a brush over a certain spot...

>> No.5063116

Find Meiling, get her to train me in fightan

>> No.5063121
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5063121

>>5063113
>he banks with Wells Fargo

>> No.5063126

>>5063108

You have to find out what games Kaguya plays so you could join her.

>> No.5063128

>>5063098
I'll just take along with me a country's wealth - like England's entire cash assets of three pounds, eleven and sixpence.

>> No.5063130

>>5063121
Oh god that face~LOL~

>> No.5063134

>>5063121
>implying that I didn't just get that check off Google Image search

>> No.5063138

Befriend Cirno.
Siding with the STRONGEST is a smart thing to do!

>> No.5063139

Living life in Gensokyo is going to be pretty boring for those that lack any knowledge in the magical arts and spiritual powers. Sure it'll be pretty cool to see fairies and monsters hanging around the human village, but as time goes by, it'll become just another ordinary sight. If I survive the initial landing, I'll probably find myself working in metal smiting or laboring in the field for the rest of my days, maybe marry a ordinary village girl and have kids, then die do to age or a disease.

>> No.5063141
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5063141

>>5063130

>> No.5063153
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5063153

>>5063141
Daddy?

>> No.5063158

>>5063139
I'd probably go into metalcrafting or decorative work. Something involving working with my hands. Maybe making metal jewelry/crafts or something.

>> No.5063160

1) learn magic
2) drink Hourai Elixir
3) live forever
4) become a touhou

>> No.5063162

>>5063158
I would seek out objects of power, in order to avoid living the dull lives both of you seem to be set on.

>> No.5063166

raperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperaperape
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>> No.5063167

>>5063160
>drink Hourai Elixir

Ooooh, be careful what you wish for.

>> No.5063170

>>5063160
you would be a manhou.

>> No.5063174

>>5063162
So we raid Marisa's house?

>> No.5063176

>>5063166
Rumia and Kisume will have fun with you.

>> No.5063192

>>5063162
Seeking out objects of power would require you to have some power to look for those objects in the first place. You'd want to get anti-youkai training first.

>> No.5063195

>>5063167
Living forever is not as bad as fiction tries to make it seem.

>> No.5063198

Well first I'd go to the hakurei shrine and see reimu.

I'd give her money and clean the shrine for her.

Eventually I'd meet yukari, and she'll take a liking to my politeness. I'd get her to talk about her home and then Ran and chen would come up, I'd say I want to meet them and she'll let me visit her home.
I would then spoil chen rotten with snack, candy, and sweets.

Chen will like me, which means Ran will like me, and if Chen and ran like me then Yukari will follow suit.

I would then get Yukari to make my cock huge, and I would use it to seduce the rest of the touhou, since they are all sluts.

Then to secure my place as Harem god king of gensokyo, I would bludgeon Rinoosuke to death with my massive man meat.


Flawless plan.

>> No.5063203

>>5063192
I get anti-Youkai training everyday I play these games.

>> No.5063216

>>5063198
Well first I'd go to the hakurei shrine and see reimu.

I'd give her money and clean the shrine for her.

Eventually I'd meet yukari, and she'll take a liking to my politeness. I'd get her to talk about her home and then Ran and chen would come up, I'd say I want to meet them and she'll let me visit her home.
I would then spoil chen rotten with snack, candy, and sweets.

Chen will like me, which means Ran will like me, and if Chen and ran like me then Yukari will follow suit.

I would then get Yukari to make me into a woman with huge tits, and I would use them to seduce the rest of the touhou, since they are all lesbian sluts.

Then to secure my place as Harem god queen of gensokyo, I would bludgeon Rinoosuke to death with my massive tits.


Flawless plan.

>> No.5063220

>>5063195
Well, I mean, if you're dead-set on it, sure.

I just think the saying applies in any case.

>> No.5063226
File: 23 KB, 450x532, 1267477229201.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063226

>>5063176
>>5063176
>>5063176

Please tell me more!

>> No.5063228
File: 508 KB, 850x1200, mad.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063228

>>5063198

Not gonna lie, the last half of that plan made me a little hot-tempered.

>> No.5063235

I got what I'll do.

I'll adopt Cirno as my own.

>> No.5063237

>>5063216
>>Chen will like me, which means Ran will like me, and if Chen and ran like me then Yukari will follow suit.

You fool, if Chen likes you that's game over from Ran.

>> No.5063240

>>5063228
> あささるの
Truly the best at spelling.

>> No.5063245
File: 10 KB, 349x314, Jafar reaction.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063245

>>5062962
>>5062979
>>5062989

For the love of god, /r/ing sauce!

>> No.5063249
File: 33 KB, 500x600, 127085390537.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063249

>>5063235

Don't forget to put some newspapers down, you can't train her.

>> No.5063252
File: 464 KB, 1024x861, 1272174919521.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063252

>>5063245
There is no sauce. It's Dr. Pepper in loli form. Have some Coke and Pepsi, too.

>> No.5063257
File: 176 KB, 500x540, 127119647183.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063257

>>5063240

You no it.

>> No.5063261

Step one:
Get a lot of fruits.

Step two:
Barter with Reimu for nuclear maid android.

Step Three:
???

Step four:
Profit.

>> No.5063262

>>5063249
Hmph! Shows what you know!

>> No.5063263

i would probably try to work at the moriya shrine, i am going to need some protection or i am screwed

>> No.5063264

>>5063252
>Have some Coke and Pepsi, too.
Which is which?

>> No.5063269

>>5063263
But what would you do if you happen to catch the eyes of certain hot-blooded goddesses?

>> No.5063270

>>5063252
Do the diet versions have smaller breasts?

>> No.5063274
File: 151 KB, 294x276, water ride guy.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063274

>>5063252

Are there any more pics of Dr Pepper loli?

>> No.5063280

>>5063264
Coke is the one with Coke bottles as hair ornaments, Pepsi is the one whose eyes match the Pepsi color scheme.

>> No.5063281

>>5063252
Are there 7up/mirinda/lipton vs sprite/fanta/nestea versions?

>> No.5063290

QUALITY THREAD

>> No.5063291

>>5063280

I do believe you've been cordially trolled. At least you were polite.

>> No.5063330
File: 651 KB, 600x600, evil furby.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063330

>>5063274

Anyone?

>> No.5063377
File: 334 KB, 850x1390, sample-a2d69a751b55f28ae583ad4fa5f8a745.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063377

>Go to Hakugyokurou
>Fall in love
>Try to survive

>> No.5063386

I open a music store and sell Touhou remix albums.

>> No.5063425

>>5063093

I'd like to learn history with Keine if you understand my underlying intentions.

>> No.5063442
File: 5 KB, 107x145, images.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063442

>>5063377
>Go to Hakugyokurou

You Are Already Dead. . .

>> No.5063455

>>5063195
Enjoy being instantly vaporized and regenerating for a few billion years when the sun goes red giant, then your eternity of being torn apart and regenerating when the universe reaches heat death.

>> No.5063462

do slinky on yuyuko's stairs

>> No.5063467
File: 27 KB, 184x184, 1254692552541.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063467

>Hakugyokurou
>Survive

>> No.5063479
File: 308 KB, 849x1202, flan 8.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063479

if everyone looks like they just popped out from ZUN's art, i'll seriously kill myself.
if not, i'll go to SDM, tell Meiling, sakuya, and Remii that im Flan's babysitter, and play a game called "sekkusu" with her.

>> No.5063485

>>5063479
Enjoy becoming a red stain on the wall in 30 seconds.

>> No.5063487

I'd say that one of the biggest hurtles would be the tough time communicating with anyone, seeing how the populace of Gensokyo is probably using an extinct variant of the Japanese language. However, canon does say that the human village as been gaining a lot of outsiders as of late and there there is an established foreign quarters, so there maybe someone that can help you.

>> No.5063496

>>5063487
It isn't THAT hard... it's just that every sentence particle in existence changes meaning AND conjugates. Oh and verb forms are a bit messier. The biggest problem is classical Japanese is still pretty bad at making clear what exactly is the subject of the sentence.

>> No.5063498
File: 217 KB, 1300x1852, 1273159992321.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063498

Watch Reimu piss.

>> No.5063518

>>5063496
But... that's the purpose of particles in Japanese. Or do you mean the particles even affect tense?

>> No.5063536
File: 94 KB, 522x858, 1272933695087.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063536

If theres a border around Gensokyo which nobody can cross from either side save for Yukari.


How the fuck did they get to the moon.

>> No.5063553

>>5063536
Who knows.

>> No.5063556

>>5063455
Still not as bad as most religion's hells.

>> No.5063559
File: 82 KB, 720x479, magic.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063559

>>5063536

>> No.5063560

Since my martial arts training would do diddly squat, so if I end up anywhere but the shrines I would be screwed. so I would have to stay with Reimu, Sanae, or Alice for a while. I would want to win over the heart of one of the other touhou's though. I'm stuck deciding between Ran, Yuuka, and Patchouli.

Yuuka, I would just need to visit each day, since I'm pretty sure there's a road heading to the field, and generally be nice and polite. over time becoming friends with her. that or she rapes me.

>> No.5063562

>>5063536
I think it was thanks to Reimu channeling one of the ancient Japanese gods.

>> No.5063573

Ran? hoo boy, that's gonna be even more dangerous than Yuuka. if I just head out to find the Yakumo home I would get lost and probably get eaten by a wild Youkai. so I would have to try and befriend either Yuyuko or Reimu first in order to befriend Yukari. Since >>5063198 is already going for Reimu. I'll try and befriend Youmu and Yuyuko. first I would have to get by Youmu, so offering to help her with chores and so on, since I can cook I would prepare a meal for Yuyuko that would win her over. I would be pretty much set after that, just ask Yuyuko to bring me along with her to the Yakumo residents and generally be nice and humble with the Yakumo's.

Now. Patchouli. the tough part would be getting into the SDM without meiling outright killing me. since I'm pretty sure my fighting skills are no where near hers (lets say I'm an ant and she's an elephant in the skills department). I would have to offer to work for Remilia. and hope to god that Remilia decides to let me work instead of turning me into cattle. if I could sneak past Meiling (doubtful) I could, hopefully run into Sakuya and offer to be a Butler. since she had no qualms offering Marisa a job (Marisa then challenging her for head position), I don't see why she wouldn't offer me one. Now, for getting past Koa. I guess I would just tell her outright that I'm a butler and I wish to serve patchouli food and drink. after that, since I'm an avid reader, I would constantly talk with Patchouli about books as I bring her food and drink, and to stay near her I would be constantly cleaning the library. over time hoping to win her heart.

>> No.5063583

>>5063518
Meaning, your verb (which by the way could be one of 6 types of verbs) can conjugate in 6 different ways... and so can the particle connected to it. What I meant by "changes meaning and conjugates" is that the particles themselves may be identical to ones used in modern Japanese, but in classical Japanese, their meaning is totally different. And they conjugate now. And there's more of 'em.

>> No.5063594

>>5063573
whoops. forgot to put >>5063560 at the start of my post.

>> No.5063602
File: 147 KB, 667x994, 1258334144711.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063602

Donate to the Hakurei Shrine.

>> No.5063606

>>5063487
I've read about the increasing outsider populace, but which piece of canon describes a foreign quarters in Gensokyo?

>> No.5063675

>>5063291
He wasn't.
>>5063280
Thank you kind sir.

>> No.5063705

>>5063606
I believe he is talking about the murder mystery story that may pertain to Alice's past. Its in the first half of the story in which we get a small description of the human village.

>> No.5063720

get back in the Tardis and go somewhere else

>> No.5063732

>>5063559

The dungeon master himself!!

I just nostalgia'd all over the place.

>> No.5063765

>>5063573

Why not just befriend China? If you know her well enough she could just let you pass...that and (assuming fanon is false and she DOESN'T sleep all day) she's very cordial with anyone who comes by so long as they don't try to outright break into SDM. The only reason why she tried defending the place from Reimu and Marisa is because they both charged in without so much as a hello.

Oh, and she could also teach you martial arts if you spend time getting to know her.

>> No.5063791

>>5063765
Heey~, I think I'll do that. makes it easier on me. and on the plus side, she could teach me how to control chi. awesome idea, why didn't I think of it? thanks anon!

>> No.5063844
File: 581 KB, 750x1050, Metroid Prine.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5063844

>>5063252
Oh my God I wanna bang Coke so hard!!

Back on topic though, I would present myself to Remilia as someone who would like to be her food. She rarely kills, and I think that volunteering like that could get me in her good graces long enough to get to know Patchouli, and then marry her.

>> No.5064022

>>5063252
I want Coke-tan. I wander if she tastes like coca cola too?

>> No.5065468

>>5063844
So what's the surprise in this game? We all know Patchouli's a girl.

>> No.5065508
File: 34 KB, 600x600, 683ce3e46a4cd08ef18cf9ab4785592f2e88326e.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5065508

Steal suwako's hat.

>> No.5067112

Believe I don't have any powers and not a god

Immediately get powers and become a god

>> No.5067162

Kill myself. It can only get worse from there.

>> No.5067206

Have a fist fight with Meiling, Suika, Yuugi, Rinnosuke and Satori

>> No.5067540

>Kill myself. It can only get worse from there.

so meeting komachi would be worse?

>> No.5067577

The cool thing is that if you arrive in Gensokyo you know about the Touhou cast.
This puts you into a superior position to most others there.

Rejoice! The time spent on /jp/ is not wasted but cleverly invested!

>> No.5067591

>>5067577
Just as planned

>> No.5067625

OH SHIT DANMAKU EVERYWHERE
FFFF-
*dies*

>> No.5067855

Disregard touhous, acquire currency, become a toubro.

>> No.5067861

>>5067577
How does that help?

>> No.5067877

get murdered horribly and messily devoured by some random youkai

>> No.5067884
File: 288 KB, 500x700, dodge this.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5067884

>>5062456
be eaten by a Youkai

>> No.5067890

Apply as maid to someone.

>> No.5067974

>>5063705
That story is about Mima.

>> No.5067989
File: 272 KB, 800x800, 7dd5fe36c8136067375a1b637adfb5a66410cf53.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5067989

Play with dolls.

>> No.5068007

[x] The lake

>> No.5068021

>>5067974
>implying Mima is blond

>> No.5068035

>>5068007
Whats so good bout dis lake?

>> No.5068037
File: 103 KB, 400x400, EMOREIMU.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068037

Ask to the first youkai I see for directions. I am lost and there's no GPS on Gensokyo.

>> No.5068053

>234 posts and 40 image replies omitted.
>OP started his thread with /r9k/'s "what do?"
You've lost your edge /jp/.

>> No.5068068

>>5068021
Touhou ghosts can have different hair color than they had when alive.

Yuyuko had normal black hair.

>> No.5068105

>>5068068
>Implying Mima was ever alive.

>> No.5068129

>>5065468
The secret is that Patchouli was drank the blood of by Remilia.

>> No.5068140
File: 141 KB, 700x700, 1248578292560.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068140

>>5068105

>> No.5068182

Defeat Sakuya so I can be the head maid

>> No.5068218

Well reading some of the comments its either die the first day I land there because I was unlucky, or I live the plain ordinary life by Gensokyo standards. Still its probably not all bad living the simple life in paradise, you will experience sights and sounds most could only dream of in the outside world.

>> No.5068221

I put the LHC in standby mode...

that fucking accelerator sucks up megawatts of energy.

>> No.5068417

>>5068068
>implying that Mima was ever alive after the formation of the Hakurei border

>> No.5068435

>>5068182

I'm taking Sakuya

>> No.5068445

>>5068053

I take it you weren't here to witness the good old days of GM and WUiG?

>> No.5068448
File: 891 KB, 160x101, 1272176081297.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068448

Me?

I would LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR
LET THE BODIES HIT THE FLOOR

>> No.5068454

I would try to find some way to kill tenshi as a sacrifice on some high mountain to try and get Iku's Loev

>> No.5068460

>>5062456

I go back to http://www.touhou-project.com/

>> No.5068463

Oh look, a "What do" thread.

Reported.

>> No.5068480

>>5068463
One related to the topic of this board.

>> No.5068506 [SPOILER] 
File: 247 KB, 800x600, 9a9e3a8c4d591964e43f1e7d3ba9867b.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068506

>>5062477
>>5062479

A 360 would end with you facing in the same direction you were facing to begin with you faggots.

Instead of going to Gensokyo you need to go to school.

inb4 HURR DURR THAT WAS THE JOKE.

No, you're just fucking stupid.

>>5062456

Stay at Alice's house,ask her some things about Gensokyo and try to find somewhere safe to live.

I'll probably end up freeloading at the Hakurei shrine or become a sex slave at the Scarlet Mansion

>> No.5068514

>>5068506

Do you even fucking realise how old those posts your quoted are? God, it's been a while since I last saw a post as stupid as yours. Unless you're trolling, in which case good fucking game, mate.

>> No.5068527
File: 478 KB, 999x999, eee60e00eded1c73a778f194830be0ed.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068527

>Unless you're trolling, in which case good fucking game, mate.

I'll let you decide.

>> No.5068528

>>5068506
Wow, you're a fucking faggot. Stop posting forever.

>> No.5068532

>>5068527

gg then

>> No.5068594

burst into tears of sheer joy

maybe kiss the ground a few times

>> No.5068621
File: 351 KB, 850x1098, sample_e0f9e0b1403eefe8aaaa63fa1ca147fe76edacad.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068621

Befriend Rinnosuke and get a part time job working for him (I would use his current tech from my world to communicate it easy), we would be book/tech bros. he seems to live a safe life,and no other touhou takes it as easy as him. Besides he would eventually introduce me to other touhous without danger of being killed or taken as a toy/meal/slave.

>> No.5068623

>>5068514
>God, it's been a while since I last saw a post as stupid as yours.
Don't come here much, huh?

>> No.5068632
File: 8 KB, 303x423, middle_finger.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068632

>You arrive in Gensokyo. What do?

Begin telling every touhou to fuck off.

>> No.5068668
File: 120 KB, 1000x941, 7047072.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068668

>>5068632
I'd give you a day at most.

>> No.5068751

Do something outrageous to get Aya's attention, get her to let me meet Momizi. Scratch behind her ears then pet her each day until she offers to bend over, doggy style.

>> No.5068799
File: 345 KB, 596x1031, momijiayamurder.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5068799

>>5068751

She's so professional.

"Only getting even, sir."
"Glad to do the right thing, sir."
"Just following orders, sir."
"Anything for the corps, sir."
"Glad to take one for the team, sir."
"Happy to be of service, sir."
"Fuck you unto the damnation of mankind, sir."

>> No.5069027
File: 97 KB, 395x494, 1273148546654.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
5069027

>>5068799
There goes my wonderful image of her.

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