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2023-11: Warosu is now out of extended maintenance.

/jp/ - Otaku Culture


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39763950 No.39763950 [Reply] [Original]

She's so cute bros, what do I say? I've never been on a date before.

>> No.39763980

Ask her about her family in Makai

>> No.39764008

/jp/ would say incredibly rude and hurtful things because they fear intimacy and are scared to accept Alice's feelings for them. In reality, she's a nice and relatively normal girl that finds (You) charming somehow.

>> No.39764011

>>39763950
>I've never been on a date before.
Neither have most /jp/sies.
Call her pretty and ask about her dolls or something.

>> No.39764084

"Have you made a doll of Big Chungus?"
"..."
"It would be very wholesome you know."

>> No.39764103

>>39764008
She was the one who invited me for tea. I was also surprised Alice wanted something like that from me. I'm not very interesting.

>>39764011
>Call her pretty and ask about her dolls or something.
I'm too shy to call her pretty, but I asked about her dolls. Her eyes lit up a little and she talked about them for a while. She went to go get a few she wanted to show me so I'm responding while she's gone.

>>39764084
I will ask her if she has made a rabbit doll when she gets back.

>> No.39764232

>>39764103
Even if you are shy, you should still compliment someone you are on a date with. You don't have to be direct, you can say indirect things as well like "you look great today, [joking tone] doing anything special?", "your hair looks great, did you have it done recently?" -- if Alice likes you she will take the compliment, and it gives her the opportunity to play it down or talk about herself.

>> No.39764437

She said she has not made a rabbit doll, though she offered to make one for me if I wanted one. I told her she didn't have to go that far, but she seemed excited at the idea of making something for me, and she loves making dolls, so I let her go ahead with the idea later.

>>39764232
I tried telling her both of your suggestions. I said "You look really nice today. I like your hair a lot.". It made her make a mildly surprised smile, then she looked away and shyly said "Thank you, I like my hair too. I learned how to cut it myself but I was worried it looked strange to others."
She then talked for a bit to say she figured out how to cut it from working on her doll's hair so often and figured she could manage her own, and that she had to learn how herself since she doesn't have anyone else to come by and trim it for her. I felt kind of bad for her after that, so I reassured her it really does look great. She shrunk a little bit into her chair and tried to hide her smile behind her teacup before realizing it was empty. She just went to go make more. I can hear her faintly humming to herself from the kitchen as I write this update.

>> No.39764454

>>39764437
What will you do if she notices? I don't think girls would like someone doing this... Don't blow your chance dude.

>> No.39764498

>>39764008
Although intimacy is scary, the reason why I say rude things to Alice is because I find it very hard to believe a girl would like me, so she's most likely just trying to make fun of me.

>> No.39764529

>>39764498
Poor /jp/. Nobody ever loved them like this.

>> No.39764541

>>39764437
Ask her how's everything going, its basic but its small talk that cant do bad

>> No.39764544

>>39764454
If she notices what? What am I doing wrong? I'm managing to only post when she's busy outside of the room, so I don't think I'm making her think she's boring me. She's actually very talkative and likes telling me about all sorts of projects she's done or is working on, despite her reputation for being reserved. She's actually very warm and friendly when you get to know her.

>>39764498
She wouldn't do that, would she? She seems so wonderful and honest, though she is shy.

>> No.39764591

massive cringe from this thread

>> No.39764593

Glad to see the alice fans are just as insane as she is

>> No.39764661

I would gladly be a loving boyfriend/husband to Alice if there wasn't a dimensional barrier between us. But because there is, I will continue posting about raping and abusing Alice.

>> No.39764672

>>39764544
>She wouldn't do that, would she?
I don't know. I just have a hard time trusting people.

>> No.39767335

>>39763950
Cum in her tea while she is not looking

>> No.39769312

This is cringy but I also genuinely enjoy it. Please continue. Alice is very cute and so are the imaginary interactions with her that I simulate in great detail in my delusional mind.

>> No.39769463

Die you worthless piece of shit

>> No.39769780

>>39767335
A real Alice aficionado would not do this. They would continue to date her as normal until they could one day marry her, and then they would cum directly inside Alice while looking right into her beautiful eyes.

>> No.39769871

>>39763950
>Fuck you Alice.
The throw the hot tea on her face.

>> No.39769913

"This tea party is very nice and all Alice, but when is my girlfriend Marisa getting here? You did invite her didn't you?"

>> No.39769976

Now the good posts are coming

>> No.39770021

>>39764008
The prophecy of anon is being fulfilled. These /jp/sies will never find a girlfriend if their rotten minds can't even be nice to someone as sweet and cute as Alice.

>> No.39770071

>>39770021
Alice is very rude and mean, the reason why we must bully Alice is because if a person does not defend themselves against her, they'll just be bullied by her

>> No.39770219

Alice isn't cute.

>> No.39770261

You guys can come with all kinds of reasons why you need to bully Alice but I'm doing it solely because seeing Alice suffer gives me joy.
A day not bullying, torturing, beating her up etc. until she's crying is a day wasted.
God, I'm gonna visit her right now rape her fucking dolls.

>> No.39770336
File: 257 KB, 1280x1810, 002.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39770336

Don't drink the tea, anon!
Whatever you do, do not drink that fucking tea!!

>> No.39770697

>>39770336
Don't worry, I'll never accept something from that nasty girl

>> No.39771457
File: 120 KB, 712x660, jp.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39771457

Why do you all hate Alice so much? Is it because she knows you're all pathetic and isn't afraid to say it?

>> No.39771526 [SPOILER] 
File: 191 KB, 2000x2000, alice posting on jaypee again.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39771526

>>39771457

>> No.39771539

When is Alice coming back for tea? I've been waiting for a while

>> No.39771586
File: 91 KB, 869x950, 1645820588868.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39771586

>went into a coma and didn't get to talk at all in detective satori
honestly, she can't recover from this

>> No.39771648

>>39771586
But she canonically got nursed and doted upon by Marisa - face it, she's the one who won.

>> No.39771655

>>39763950
Compliment her hair or clothes.

>> No.39771675

>>39771655
"Wow Alice, did you actually wash your hair today? And those clothes look almost clean for once!"

>> No.39773330
File: 445 KB, 634x800, 1429076119422.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39773330

>>39771675
Alice is not a stinky smelly NEET like you! Look, she was even undressing for a shower right now.

>> No.39773424

>>39773330
Undressing in front of another person. What a whore

>> No.39773453

Alice has a hairy pussy

>> No.39773461

Alice's stinky pussy hairs!

>> No.39773495
File: 264 KB, 501x702, mama.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39773495

Sex with Alice's mother

>> No.39773540

>>39773495
Just make sure to pull out, you dont want to risk another alice ruining the neighbourhood

>> No.39773545

>>39773495
Why not both?

>> No.39773572

>>39773461
I want to take a deep whiff of Alice's cunt. Once I pass out, Alice will probably tie me up and turn her basement into a rape dungeon.
I will be broken by her feminine odors.

>> No.39773579

>>39773540
Shinki made Alice using magic. That's why Alice came out so weird.
I'm going to cum inside Shinki, taking her virginity in the process. Our children will be nothing like her.

>> No.39773583

>>39773572
Hot and same

>> No.39773608

>>39771648
She even got got patted by Yuyuko. Literally living the dream

>> No.39773611

>>39773424
Excuse me, but she has clearly been intruded upon.

>> No.39773628

>>39773611
Seeing as how this supposed "intruder" got right up next to her and she never noticed, I'm assuming Alice enjoys people watching her strip, very slutty!!

>> No.39773631

>>39773611
No one would walk in on her, her stinky smell would give it away

>> No.39773836

>>39773628
I hope she told her date she has an exhibition kink.

>> No.39773865

>>39773836
Alice has many kinks that her partner should know about, but she wont tell

>> No.39773888

>>39773865
It must be fun finding them all out. She would always have something new and interesting to spice up your love life.

>> No.39773914

>>39773888
Its like pokemon, you gotta discover them all! But much more degenerate. And dangerous. And possibly life threatening. Life threatening for her or you I'm not sure

>> No.39773921

>>39773914
Wow, Alice is such an exhilarating lover! How did such a quiet girl hide such a sexy secret?

>> No.39773944

>>39773921
>hide such a sexy secret?
She has never had a boyfriend, or if she has he made it to the life threatening kinks probably. (You) could be the first person to discover Alice's very dark side

>> No.39774121

Sorry Alice but I'm gay. It can't work out between us.

>> No.39774147

>>39771457
I went outside and I died.

>> No.39774207

>>39773944
>>39774121
What if the reason Alice has been single this whole time is that she's gay? Is that why her and Marisa are such good friends?

>> No.39774244

>>39774207
If that was the case then why does she keep attempting to seek attention from different anons?

>> No.39774248

Alice wants to turn you into a girl

>> No.39774269

>>39774248
Please! Please pick me, Alice! I want to be a girl!!

>> No.39774287

>>39774248
Alice, I'm here! I think you're cool, pick me!

>> No.39774296

>>39774248
I dont wanna be a girl, please leave me alone Alice

>> No.39774302

>>39774244
She's probably desperate. Marisa hasn't been around to satisfy her ever since Alice's dangerous kinks killed her.

>> No.39774313

>>39774269
>>39774287
>>39774296
Alice will never care about you. She wants a strong, masculine man so she can break his spirit.

>> No.39774325

>>39774313
Okay but I don't want Alice to do that to me so that's a good thing

>> No.39774326
File: 611 KB, 1000x1100, STRONK.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39774326

>>39774313
But Alice is big and strong!

>> No.39774375

>>39774313
Look if Alice won't do it I'll ask Seiga to

>> No.39774386

>>39774207
Alice is only gay because she doesn't get any attention from the opposite gender.
That's also the reason why some /jp/sies are gay.

>> No.39774396

>>39774386
I want to be prison gay with Alice!

>> No.39774402
File: 269 KB, 1440x1080, __alice_margatroid_shanghai_doll_and_hourai_doll_touhou_drawn_by_wankosoba__af8cf1a1e05353211752f1edabff7b8e.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39774402

I want to take Alice out on a date and overwhelm Gensokyo with the combination of our natural scents.
We're going to have sweaty and smelly public sex. Everyone is going to bow down to our power!
Once we establish our reign over Gensokyo, I'll send every major figure in the outside world a scratch and sniff card of our extreme sex smells and they'll become our puppets if they don't have a stroke!

>> No.39774403

Alice can't turn me into a girl if I don't turn her into a boy first

>> No.39774412
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39774412

>>39773608
The world belongs to Margatroid, we're only living in it.

>> No.39774427
File: 478 KB, 800x800, 90d87b6197054205fcf2dc8280a0b8f36c018691.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39774427

>>39774396
>>39774403
These posts confuse me

>> No.39774454

>>39774412
Nobody can resist a whiff of Alice's signature scent.

>> No.39774526
File: 487 KB, 2952x2031, __alice_margatroid_touhou_drawn_by_ruukii_drift__d2871063c7c98b494fb6e526c6fb4c3f.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39774526

Alice's supernaturally potent seed giving me an anal pregnancy!
Having extremely autistic quadruplets!
Alice's genetics overpowering my own causing me to take on some of her traits!
Doing all over again!

>> No.39774544

>>39774526
This implies Alice has a penis, which is false.

>> No.39774553

Neither /jp/ nor Alice understand sex

>> No.39774560
File: 49 KB, 347x321, fresh cream alice.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39774560

>>39774544
Alice is a futanari!

>> No.39774581

>>39774553
Is that why many of us are fascinated with her? Both the ones who love Alice and the ones who want to torture Alice?

>> No.39774608

>>39774553
Alice thinks kissing makes babies

>> No.39774628

Why is Alice a human (former) witch if her mom is a god? Shouldn't she be a Makai demon like the rest of them.
seems to me like Alice is adopted.

>> No.39774630

>>39774553
That makes her perfect for most /jp/sies. Unfortunately they don't understand and will instead be very rude to Alice, so they will remain unloved virgins forever.

>> No.39774766

>>39774630
Rudeness is in my blood. It's not that I want to be rude, it's that everything I do is rude. Even my politeness is rude.

>> No.39774831

>>39774766
Suck Alice's cock, dude.

>> No.39774848

>>39774630
But a relationship with Alice and me would just be one of mental illness and manipulation. It would be a loving one probably, but the chances of me being drugged and bounded are very high

>> No.39774865

>>39774831
I don't wanna suck cock. She should suck mine instead. Or not if she doesn't feel like it, I'm not her boss.

>> No.39775054

Why is this whore still alive? Guess I'll have to kill her again..

>> No.39775063

I wish Alice was real

>> No.39775066

Stupid whore Alice should of stayed dead..

>> No.39775082

I will love and marry Alice
I will look her in the eyes and hold her hands while I cum inside
I will raise our many children and be happy with Alicewife and Alicekids

>> No.39775144

Imagine Alice forcing you to marry her and have kids with her haha..

>> No.39775174

>>39775144
Imagine the pretend wedding and all the dolls she'll make for them

>> No.39775267
File: 470 KB, 619x927, 1428876913877.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39775267

>>39775082
>>39775144
>>39775174
Imagine the smile on her face as she realizes she'll never have to be alone again now that you're here with her, forever.

>> No.39775321

>>39775267
Well when shes kidnapped me, I don't really have a choice

>> No.39775420

>>39775066
Perhaps she likes being killed? Though she only managed to endure seven stabs last time until she died. She's so weak..

>> No.39775452

>>39775420
Maybe Alice is getting weaker? What will happen when Alice can't endure any more stabs..

>> No.39775463

>>39775452
She turns into Lolice

>> No.39775500

>>39775463
But that's a good thing to happen to her

>> No.39775567

>>39775463
I want to molest Lolice.

>> No.39775615

>>39775567
You're going to get a visit from the Police if you keep up that attitude.

>> No.39775639

>>39775615
That's not fair, Alice rapes fairies and nothing happens to her.

>> No.39775649

>>39775615
>>39775639
Alice raped me when I was a child and all I got was a lousy orgasm

>> No.39775726

>>39774396
Enjoy being gay by yourself, because I'm going to date and sleep with Alice!

>> No.39780488

>>39763950
I've never even kissed a girl don't ask me

>> No.39780616

>>39780488
>I've never even kissed a girl
Alice would make fun of you because of it, even though she has never kissed a boy.

>> No.39780644

>>39780616
Forcefully taking Alice's first kiss because she keeps bullying me!

>> No.39780712

>>39780616
I'd probably not cry but i'd have this sad almost crying face I make when someone is rude to me
I thought dates were supposed to be nice not another opportunity for me to be bullied

>> No.39780943
File: 139 KB, 600x800, 9ce4c2f6958552cf1f3e83a3083b9218.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39780943

>>39780712
Don't think badly of Alice. She's very insecure and this is the first time she truly believes she isn't the biggest loser in Gensokyo. She isn't trying to hurt you.
Say to her "if you don't like the fact that I never kissed a girl, how about you fix it for me?".
Trust me, amazing things will happen after you say it.

>> No.39781583

>>39780943
She kissed me! She really kissed me! Her lips tasted like girliness and green tea!

>> No.39781968
File: 826 KB, 720x960, 1646893951548.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39781968

I want to get with Goliath-chan

>> No.39782349

If i get on my hands and knees and beg, will she wear Alice in Wonderland clothes?

>> No.39782371
File: 281 KB, 586x1050, __alice_margatroid_and_alice_margatroid_touhou_and_1_more_drawn_by_dairi__e8bbee2a1376600a1db385b9db2aa15d.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39782371

>>39782349
Sure but she wont buy a new outfit and she has grown a bit since her youth so it might be a bit tight

>> No.39782396

Don't get too comfortable with Alice and don't let toy with you, she might ask for weird requests.

>> No.39782431

>>39782396
She asked me to hold hands and let her cuddle me while she falls asleep.

>> No.39782434

>>39782396
What are some of these weird requests, asking for myself

>> No.39782479

I liked her when she was a loli
Please become a loli again Alice-chan

>> No.39782508

>>39782479
I know that seeing your child becoming an adult and moving out is painful, but you need to get over it, Shinki.

>> No.39782623
File: 185 KB, 768x910, 1650714866853.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39782623

Shanghai got concerned about Alice and has gotten help from a professional

>> No.39782803

>>39782371
This Alice is made for mating press

>> No.39782809

>>39782623
Who needs a loli alice when the stinky adult one acts like a six-year-old already?

>> No.39782821

>>39782434
She's going to ask you for flowers and a kiss when you come to see her.

>> No.39782840

>>39782821
How awful of her, is she going to want to share a box of chocolates and cuddle in bed as well? Jesus christ talk about high maintenance

>> No.39783085

>>39782840
Alice has been very lonely and desperate, please understand. She's pushy to do those things because she wants to experience them at least once in her life but is scared she's getting too old to find a loving partner that will do them willingly.

>> No.39783137

>>39783085
I guess someone has to do it, I will make the sacrifice and let Alice experience love and I wont judge her for (also) being inexperienced

>> No.39783230

I'm too shy to kiss or hug Alice..

>> No.39783636

Dame, these Alice Threads sure go fast and unlike most of the others, there bearly seem to be any image dumping. What makes her so popular /jp/?

>> No.39783652

>>39783636
People love to hate her. It's easier to talk shit than have constructive discourse

>> No.39783677

My hatred for Alice has slowly turned into love I think. I feel jealousy when other anons want to hurt her because only I'm allowed to hurt her

>> No.39783756 [DELETED] 

>>39783636
Alioce is controversial and also popular. Many people love to hate her and many people simply love her. This creates a lot of discourse over what the proper way to interact with Alice would be, and since her shut-in tendencies leave little of her own input, it dominates the threads about her.

>> No.39783768

>>39783636
Alice is controversial and also popular. Many people love to hate her and many people simply love her. This creates a lot of discourse over what the proper way to interact with Alice would be and, since her shut-in tendencies leave little of her own input, it dominates the threads about her.

>> No.39784954

I weigh 400 pounds, why would Alice go on a date with me?

>> No.39784972

Alice is the sort of girl who looks at insane boys (e.g. serial killers, Satanists, /jp/sies) and says to herself "I can fix him", while in reality the one who needs to be fixed is Alice herself.

>> No.39785649

Alice is the type of girl who would kidnap or adopt a young boy and literally raise him to become her husband

>> No.39785709

>>39785649
That sounds pretty good.

>> No.39785718

>>39785649
GIWTWM

>> No.39785731

>>39785649
Please adopt me, Alice!

>> No.39785738

>>39784972
Fixing Alice while being fixed by Alice!

>> No.39785748

The Alice you see is a lie. A humanlike puppet being remotely controlled by an unsociable, scared little girl.

>> No.39785751

>>39785738
Healthy healing romantic relationship with Alice!

>> No.39785758

>>39785748
That's sounds pretty good.

>> No.39785762

>>39785748
Alice has autism?

>> No.39785772

The Alice you see is a lie. A humanlike puppet being remotely controlled by an unsociable, scared little boy who looks like a girl.

>> No.39785777

>>39785748
I'm a lolicon who likes shy girls, so this is perfect.

>> No.39785798

>>39785738
That sounds lovely

>> No.39785800

>>39785772
This... can't be...

>> No.39788168

>>39785772
Lies.

>> No.39788711

I hope you step on lego you dumb bitch
And then I'll kick you in the face

>> No.39788735
File: 141 KB, 708x1000, 1614983626907.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39788735

>>39784972
I want Alice to damage me further as she tries to fix me

>> No.39791719

I came in my pants just by looking at Alice

>> No.39791750

>>39784972
I want to be in a mentally abusive relationship with Alice and we learn to depend on each other so that we can never be apart!

>> No.39792499

>>39785772
Even better

>> No.39792527
File: 622 KB, 2048x1735, 1603471823896.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39792527

>>39791750
Being in a codependent relationship with Alice! Unable to be separated without feeling immense anxiety!

>> No.39792528

>>39784954
Yeah

>> No.39792577

>>39792527
Threatening suicide if Alice ever thinks of leaving me!

>> No.39792598
File: 236 KB, 700x700, 1649115494405.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39792598

>>39792577
Alice finding the gesture moving and growing even more attached to me as a result! I love Alice!

>> No.39792608
File: 963 KB, 1024x723, 1646321751733.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39792608

>>39792527
Cool Marisa doll Alice! The skin feels so real!

>> No.39792798

>>39792608
Wow, it even breathes and feels warm to the touch! Alice has such amazing skills to make a doll this realistic.

>> No.39792833

>>39764593
you may laugh but i used to mock Alice lovers for being schizos and i slowly started to like her myself... now i am taking Aripiprazole

>> No.39792856

Do I get to hug Alice's dolls too or would she get jealous? Maybe also my scent might not be ideal to get on Alice's dolls

>> No.39792872

>>39763950
I wanna give her a lap pillow and gently stroke her head as she relaxes

>> No.39792874

>>39792527
Getting into a fight with Alice because I accidentally looked in the direction of another woman and cuddling and kissing her till she forgives me!

>> No.39792940

I'm a battered husband, Alice uses her dolls to beat the shit out of me when I don't do what she wants.
She does it to claim that she never laid a finger on me.

>> No.39793003
File: 230 KB, 1200x1200, 1601168732899.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39793003

>>39792874
But anon! Why would you look at other women even if by mistake? Alice is the prettiest, most lovely girl there is and she should be more than enough for you! (or so she keeps saying)

>> No.39793016

>>39793003
It was a mistake, I swear!
Please don't hurt me...

>> No.39793027

>>39793003
I didn't know she would be there I swear, please don't get mad you know I would never look at another woman willingly

>> No.39793063

>>39793016
>Please don't hurt me...
You're in for a world of hurt, buddy!

>> No.39793316

Men can get raped too, Alice constantly proves that fact

>> No.39793379

Alice makes her potential boyfriend cry & be in constant fear!

>> No.39793399

I want Alice to make me fear leaving my room and to be so afraid of her that it keeps me awake!

>> No.39793614

>>39793316
Alice will be tried in court for her crimes.

>> No.39793626

>>39793614
Having Stockholm syndrome and dropping all charges against Alice!

>> No.39793927

>>39793027
How about plucking your eyes out so that you can never make this mistake again? Isn't this a great idea?

>> No.39793952

>>39793927
Will Alice look after me when I got blind? Will she make me a little doll to help me get around? If so then yes!

>> No.39793981

>>39793927
But then how will I see Alice's beautiful face every moment?

>> No.39794017

>>39793981
We touch her face instead, slowly caressing it. Being blind benefits (you) because you'll be able to get away with feeling up Alice

>> No.39794037

>>39793952
She will, and the doll will purposely guide you to bump into things, because she's jealous of your relationship with Alice.

>> No.39794083

>>39794037
Do you think its possible to make both Alice and her dolls all equally loved without any jealousy?

>> No.39794118

Just woke up from Alice paizurirape lucid dream

>> No.39794146

>>39794083
I'm afraid it might be impossible. There are only 24 hours in a day after all.

>> No.39794183

>>39794146
Truly a shame, but those 24 hours can be dedicated to Alice

>> No.39797184

>>39763950
>I've never been on a date before.
Me neither.
I think you should just start talking about things you do and find interesting since those'll make it easier to speak. If she's a good match for you then she'll be interested, too!

>> No.39797209

>>39794118
>paizurirape
naizurirape*

>> No.39797257

>>39797209
She had very large breasts

>> No.39797332

A thread for losers to talk about another loser

>> No.39797513

>>39793003
I didn't know Marisa would enter our home uninvited! I thought it was a burglar!

>> No.39797891

>>39797332
Are you saying this thread is all Alice talking to herself?

>> No.39802513

I'm going to Alice

>> No.39802524

>>39797891
Yes. You are Alice

>> No.39802539

>>39802524
NO HE ISN'T NO HE ISN'T NO HE ISN'T

>> No.39802681
File: 169 KB, 428x500, 1649549240796.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39802681

>>39802539

>> No.39802794
File: 990 KB, 850x988, 1629954257251.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39802794

Dont go to Alice, she is dangerous

>> No.39802809

came on a doll

>> No.39802827

>>39802681
You will NOT

>> No.39802952
File: 65 KB, 320x446, 1650526950708.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39802952

>>39782623
She got tired of her long ago

>> No.39803408

>>39802952
Alice has many real friends! Just look at how many people are talking to her here. She even had a date.

>> No.39803485

>>39803408
Yeah, i'm Alice's friend! I can attest to her being really nice, beautiful, and very skilled at making dolls! Her dolls would never be rude to her!

>> No.39803604
File: 268 KB, 1000x1400, 1639938714382.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39803604

>>39802794
Why does she wear such suspiciously thick underwear?

>> No.39803752

>>39803604
It's to keep her massive weiner in place.

>> No.39806436

Where would (You) take Alice on a date?

>> No.39806600

>>39806436
A doll shop probably, it'd interest her and I find antiques unique

>> No.39806614

>>39806436
To a dark alley. Then I beat her up and steal her dolls.

>> No.39807215

>>39806436
The pharmacy so we can pick up our meds together.

>> No.39807274

>>39807215
That actually sounds like a very cute date.

>> No.39807294

>>39807215
Taking your schizophrenia medication with Alice!

>> No.39807325

>>39807294
Alice disappearing after taking your medication together!
Not being able to handle her gone again!
Finally sleep an eternal slumber so you can be together forever!

>> No.39807358

A bunch of social outcasts projecting their insecurities on a fictional character lmao
/jp truly is the board for the most pathetic basement-dwelling scum.
Crossie out.

>> No.39807381

>>39807358
Alice insulting me so she can make herself feel better!

>> No.39807594

>>39807325
Travelling to Gensokyo to meet Alice and make her your wife!

>> No.39808878
File: 296 KB, 651x925, 98ea8f0097a0c83dbcb11704ccf28334b33b5c1d.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39808878

>> No.39808974

>>39808878
Made for rape.

>> No.39808991

>>39808878
Why haven't her breasts expanded yet? Is the hypnosis not working?

>> No.39813271

>>39808878
Alice is cute and bunny.

>> No.39813406

>>39773579
Nah worse, Alice is an adoption

>> No.39813436
File: 2.42 MB, 1530x1700, 1647819365421.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39813436

You were supposed to have a great date with Alice, concluding in a kiss, make love with her, and impregnate her with many children!
What's stopping you? Hurry up already!

>> No.39813439

>>39813436
Can I have Louise instead?

>> No.39813467

>>39813436
It's hard to do it with you looking, Shinki.

>> No.39813528

>>39813467
Is that anon actually Shinki?

>> No.39813553

>>39813528
Shinki is too busy to shitpost on Anonymous boards, but it might be someone under her

>> No.39813578

>>39813528
Where else will she find someone desperate enough to date her daughter?

>> No.39813603

There really is no other place on the internet where you'd find people genuinely interested in Alice.

>> No.39813631

>>39802681
how do i alice

>> No.39814052
File: 384 KB, 904x1255, __yumeko_touhou_and_1_more_drawn_by_yanagi_no_ki__6788ceff1b55790255899796574c222d.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39814052

>>39813436
You already push Yumeko on me, how many of your daughters do you want me to marry and impregnate?

>> No.39814270

I'm feeling strangely sleepy after dinner

>> No.39814302

>>39813436
Alice makes love on the first date?

>> No.39814419
File: 2.57 MB, 1276x975, 1642540986007.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39814419

>>39814270
Lie down on Alice's bed for a bit
Everything will be alright

>> No.39814677

>>39814419
Waking up in a bathtub full of ice without Alice!

>> No.39814821

>>39814677
Waking up and not being able to move!
Seeing Alice and being confused because she's now twenty times your size!
Taking a closer look at your surroundings and noticing that Alice didn't become a giant, and instead it's you who became tiny!
Finally realizing that Alice transferred your soul into a doll!

>> No.39815311

>>39814821
> Alice pulled an Illya
Considering how creepy she aperently is, not surprised

>> No.39815371

>>39814677
>>39814821
Waking up and being in restraints!
Not remembering who or where you are!
Alice coming down the stairs!
She embraces you and tells you it's all okay now!
You both start crying together!

>> No.39815458

>>39815371
Not gonna lie man some light and wholesome bondage with Alice seems pretty cute and fun.

>> No.39815516

>>39771526
Anon I... I'm scared.

>> No.39815617

>>39815458
Despite her skills with making dolls, she's actually not very good at bondage and eve has trouble tying knots, please be patient with her

>> No.39815792

>>39815617
Encouraging flustered and embarassed Alice as she tries to tie you up!

>> No.39815860

>>39815792
What will she do once you're tied up?

>> No.39815910

>>39815860
She would like to act on her very impure thoughts but doesn't know how to and is scared, so instead she just shows you her dolls that she is working on

>> No.39815918

>>39815860
Spend hours telling you all about her dolls and her boring and poorly written fanfictions.

>> No.39815933

>>39815918
>>39815910
That doesnt sound so bad, in fact it sounds pretty good. I'd be glad to cheer Alice on for whatever doll she's working on, or her fanfics.
Does a girl that nice have any impure thoughts in the first place?

>> No.39815943

>>39815933
She does but she doesn't want to scare (You) off because you're one of the few people that are actually interested in her dolls

>> No.39815978

>>39815933
She is a huge pervert when she's alone, but since she has zero real experience, she gets very nervous and embarrassed if you do something as tame as asking to hold hands.

>> No.39816026

>>39813436
Why are you trying to set me up with Alice, when Sacchan is available? Hell, I'll even settle for Elis at this point.

>> No.39816048
File: 504 KB, 450x800, Cross-Over.full.2162033.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39816048

>>39814821
Illya can turn people into dolls?
imagine if her and Alice teamed up and started collecting anons and turning them into dolls for them to play with haha
wouldn't that be funny haha?

>> No.39817072

>>39815617
It's okay if she'll be the one tied up.

>> No.39817081

>>39815918
Writing erotica with Alice!

>> No.39818626
File: 562 KB, 800x1354, 1627584063073.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39818626

You will be Alice's love, but also her friend
You will fulfill each & every one of her desires, whether it be gathering materials in order to make dolls, being a lovey dovey lover, or fulfilling her unique fetishes.

>> No.39819228

>>39818626
Alice sounds so perfect.

>> No.39819278

>>39818626
That doesn't seem so bad, what is the catch?

>> No.39819295
File: 146 KB, 532x900, 1649562158020.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39819295

>>39808991
it takes time for it to work

>> No.39819304

>>39819278
It's Alice

>> No.39819317

>>39819304
But Alice is wonderful. I love Alice!

>> No.39819325

>>39819304
Oh no? The pros seem to massively outweigh the cons here

>> No.39820705

>>39819295
Groping Alice's huge breasts consensually!

>> No.39820790

>>39818626
That sounds great.
Alice is a lovely girl.

>> No.39822028

>>39818626
Then Alice will have to take the Z-cup boobs drug I bought. She can do whatever she likes to me after that.

>> No.39822130

>>39818626
What fetishes are we talking about here

>> No.39823061
File: 551 KB, 848x1199, alice.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39823061

>> No.39823638

>>39822130
You get to fuck any 2hu you want but only when she's watching

>> No.39824248

>>39823638
Alice must be my soul mate, because that's exactly my fetish.

>> No.39825798
File: 67 KB, 1280x720, maxresdefault.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39825798

>>39815311
>>39816048
Can't wait for this happen to Alice too.

>> No.39826025

>>39823638
But I only want to fuck Alice.

>> No.39826041

>>39826025
Why would you want to fuck Alice? She's very gross and smelly.

>> No.39826046
File: 840 KB, 800x800, lolice and her sisters.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39826046

Well?

>> No.39826057

>>39826041
I want to fuck Alice while all of the other 2hus watch.

>> No.39826073

>>39826046
Yuki is so cool!

>> No.39826272

>>39826073
*hot
Mai is the cool one

>> No.39827570

How much for one night?

>> No.39827599

>>39827570
5€ for a blowjob, 10€ for vaginal and 20€ for anal.

>> No.39828151

>>39827599
I didn't know Gensokyo was a part of the EU.

>> No.39828158

>>39828151
Gensokyo uses a trade and barter system

Alice is willing to give you vaginal sex in exchange for your virginity

>> No.39828204

>>39828158
But I only have one virginity to give. How will I receive vaginal sex with Alice if I have nothing else she wants in a trade?

>> No.39828351

>>39828204
Your anal virginity could be a good bartering chip

>> No.39828358

Let Alice put doll strings on you

>> No.39828405
File: 566 KB, 566x800, __yumeko_mugetsu_kurumi_louise_and_elis_touhou_and_1_more_drawn_by_hemogurobin_a1c__6a35f91ed0e3117bafd85fd421327fa0.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39828405

>>39826046
What a bunch of little kids. I'd rather spend my vacation with Alice's more mature sisters and their friends.

>> No.39828604

>>39828351
That's still only two virginities. Am I going to have a sexless marriage with Alice?

>> No.39828694
File: 462 KB, 703x1000, a4906d301bb372b45ecf7ae62f57066f.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39828694

>>39828158
>your virginity
I don't know why she wants that but I wholeheartedly accept her proposal.
Since she didn't specify how many times or for how long I can have sex with her, I'm going to assume I can do it as much as I want.

>> No.39828755

>>39828604
offer more virginities

>> No.39828762

>>39828694
Alice and (You) losing your virginity to each other on your wedding night!

>> No.39828769

>>39828755
Just how many virginities does one person have?

>> No.39828818

>>39828769
You have anal virginity, penile virginity, oral virginity, probably others

I've never eaten a chili dog in my life, so I still have my chili dog virginity intact

>> No.39828820

>>39828769
well you've got two knees so that's a couple right there

>> No.39828871

>>39828769
NTR virginity

>> No.39828889

>>39828769
Two armpit virginities, one for each pit.

>> No.39828905

>>39828769
The limits are your own imagination. And if you do run out, just get something sharp - we'll create some new ones...

>> No.39829894

>>39826057
I have that same fantasy just with Tenshi. I imagine it doing it during one if those parties that Reimu has.

>> No.39830080

>>39826057
Raw and passionate mating with the pure intention of impregnating Alice in the human village

>> No.39830878

>>39828204
You can impregnate her

>> No.39834253

>>39829894
I would clang a fork against my glass and tell everyone to gather around me and my wife Alice. Then I would start to strip her naked and make love to her in front of all of them. I will be a good husband to Alice and fulfill her exhibitionism fetish!

>> No.39834356

I'm going to hypnotize Alice for the purpose of fun activities rather than rape.

>> No.39834618

>>39834356
Playing Mario Kart with hypnotized Alice!

>> No.39837669

>>39834356
Making a hypnotized Alice talk using her vagina for ventriloquism!

>> No.39837742

>>39828818
you definitely never lost your job virginity, your gf virginity or your success virginity lmao

>> No.39838061

>>39837742
I've lost all three. Not my actual virginity though, I have some medical issues with my penis and I prefer to keep it under wraps.

>> No.39838121

>>39837742
>you definitely never lost your job virginity
I did. It was awful.
>gf virginity
I will when I arrive at Gensokyo and confess my love to Alice.

>> No.39839078

>>39838121
more like you'll lose your fist to face virginity (again) fukin nerd lol

>> No.39839208

>>39839078
You need to be 18 to post on this website.

>> No.39839770

>>39839208
i'm probably older than you, child.

>> No.39840018

Why does Alice attract so many people who want to hurt her or others?

>> No.39841611

Alice is my mommy

>> No.39841632

>>39841611
I didn't give my son permission to use 4chan

>> No.39842214
File: 925 KB, 764x1100, 1646860921352.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39842214

Getting closer to Alice so she can present her family to you!

>> No.39842246
File: 944 KB, 850x1200, 1640035561815.png [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39842246

Alice is oddly womanly...

>> No.39842294

>>39842246
Alice is a beautiful woman.

>> No.39843574

>>39763950
I like Alice because her dolls are cool

>> No.39844013

Is there any 2hu that has Threads as active as Alice?

>> No.39844361

You guys suck with women. If you really want to woo her you gotta hit her with the "wanna come to my place and watch L-Gaim?"

>> No.39845019

Alice is a wo/m/anchild?
Does she believe in Getter?

>> No.39845132

>>39842214
How did Alice end up as such a failure when her sisters are all so well adjusted?

>> No.39845212
File: 43 KB, 640x480, Tiny Fairy L-Fau.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
39845212

>>39844361
Based, that was such a great show. But isn't it Sanae who likes that sort of thing?

>> No.39846794

>>39845132
>well adjusted
Mai is worse than Alice

>> No.39847020

>>39846794
Her being a psycopath means that she's still more well adjusted than Alice, who can barely carry out her adult responsibilities without breaking down.

And Mai doesn't leak poop.

>> No.39847055

>>39846794
Mai at least knows how and when to pretend to be normal.
Alice doesn't even realize that she's a creep.

>> No.39850920

Guys the date was a failure. I followed all of your advice, but it still ended terribly.

>> No.39850932

>>39850920
It's alright. If anything goes wrong it's always Alice's fault.

>> No.39851023

>>39837742
I lost my dildo virginity to someone’s house

>> No.39851588

>>39850920
You were still on a date for 7 days, that's a whole week of spending time with Alice!

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