/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Because I love you.

That's not how it works.

I fapped to you daily

Because I'm a pretty cool dude.

If Tenshi can get in it can't be hard.

Because I fought in the Great War.

I am a pure virgin.

>>3902800
I agree.

I am Gundam.

I tried for more than 10 years to reach out to my family by treating them respectfully and demanding the same.

This shows my drive and goodwill. My eventual failure is either innocence and ingenuity on my persona or injustice in my life.

Because God must be in his heaven or all will never be right with the world.

Because without love it can't be seen.

Hey, wait a minute. I'm not dead, stop lying to me.

Because I will be going on a date with Komachi and she'll need to take a day off even though she used all of them already.

I spent my life trying to change pedophiles and weeaboos wicked ways.

But heaven doesn't exist.

>>3902838
Is pedophilia wrong according to the bible?

>>3902844
The bible isn't perfect, they left out abortion too.

>>3902844
>>3902847
I suspect he's talking about uncleanliness and sloth.

What's a heaven? I want to get into gensoukyou, faggot.

>>3902790
stop spamming ur shitty board on ａ ｎ o ｎ t ａ ｌ ｋ . com ok thanks and a hav a good day

Because if I get sent to hell it's just going to make Armageddon a shit ton more difficult for heaven.

>>3902852
No pedophilia is immoral.

Because if you don't, Nitori's Shagohod will be complete, and then Patchouli will be able to launch nukes anywhere in Gensokyo.

And you're forgetting one more very basic thing... You don't have what it takes to send me to hell.

no reason really, guess I'll just chill out with my bros in hell.

Why would I want to go to heaven? I do not want to hang out with pedophiles, suicide bombers, or virgins. Hell has all of the cool people.

Because I just fought my way outta hell.

>>3902792
stop spamming ur shitty board on ａ ｎ o ｎ t ａ ｌ ｋ . com ok thanks and a hav a good day

I'd prefer taking up an internship with the Yama. Haven't done anything noteworthy in this life and I probably won't in my next.

Jesus stole my bike after I let him borrow 40 bucks and kept it a secret that he was an illegal. He owes me.

>>3902842
But you are in front of the judge of Hell. With this irrefutable proof that there is Heaven, how can you continue to deny it?

>>3902887
There is no evidence that this person is a judge of hell, nor that she is reality. I can be dreaming or there is an evil demon/scientist feeding me information giving me the illusion of reality.

>>3902887
It's useless, it's all useless.

>>3902886
Was he wearing Dickies and had a very long shirt?

Siki doesn't judge people that way.

>>3902890
>>3902895

>>3902901
You're not real, Beatrice.

>>3902890
You clearly remember dying. You have been transported through the Sanzu river by a death god, which is filled with dragons and the souls of the damned. Upon reaching shore, you witnessed the Hell of Blazing Fires. There, you are brought before the Judge of Hell, who has told you everything you have done in your life, and can tell if you lie or say the truth without fail.

And you still don't believe you are about to be judged?

>>3902809
I don't think you did. And you did, you most likely killed your fellow man.

>>3902983
You forgot the bridge with 3 questions you must answer.

>>3902983
Nope, it looks like just a weird dream. Being aware of the fact that this is almost certainly not reality, I try and manifest naked lolis with my mind.

>>3903013
The Judge of Hell is aware of your perversions and is now beating the sin out of your wretched soul with a very hard wooden club.

Nope. No naked lolis for you. And you have displeased the Judge of Hell.

Black.

BECAUSE I AM THE FIST OF GOD!

>>3903036
Blasphemous and prideful.

Black.

>>3902794
It's my first day.

You think I should go to hell, and I think I should go to heaven.

I'll tell you what, how about we meet half way and I'm sent to Hakugyokurou?

>>3903057
You are not thinker or a poet or have done anything of worth. You do not even meet the bare requirements. Not to mention I already know of your vile intentions, disgusting creature.

Sloth.

Black.

Because I sold my soul to three different archdukes of hell, and if I actually get sent to hell, there'd be a civil war so violent for the claim of my soul it'd spill out onto the physical plane and destroy millions of innocent lives?

>>3903078
Worry not. Your soul shall be shattered evenly, and those fiends will get their fair share. You, however, will still go to Hell.

Communion with demons, greed.

Black.

>>3903077
>You are not thinker or a poet or have done anything of worth.

Aha! By judging me you admit my existance, which means you believe I am.
Since I am, therefore I think!

Clearly I am a thinker.

Because I was the best dictator.

>>3903090
The demons would be encroaching on each other's territories though. Aren't you, as a judge, going to uphold contracts to the fullest extent of the law? If you aren't, then there's no place for you to be judging souls, is there?

>>3903103

Oh! Snap, crackle, pop!

>>3903098
It's true, he was the best.

>>3902794
I just realized if I should die right now, I'm screwed as fuck.

Because you killed me

>>3903098

Truth be told, you were a pretty decent dictator, Benito. As an Italian myself, what should I do to wish you back?

Because I'm a time-displaced version of yourself from THE FUTURE, here to bear grim forebodings of what lies on your path if you do not change your ways at once, past Shikieiki! Repent at once!

>>3902794
I haven't done anything evil. Maybe some petty bickering and some jerk things in the heat of the moment but nothing hitler worthy.

>>3903096
Strawman logic does not work here. You are still going to Hell.

>>3903098
Your arrogance cost the lives of thousands of humans, including your own people, in a senseless war.

Pride.

Black.

>>3903103
You do not understand mortal, your soul, even when shattered and bringing you great pain, can still be used fully. It is a fitting punishment for someone such as you.

>>3903125

Just believe in me. I'll return.

>>3902794
When I was 6, I gave my eternal soul in writing to my childhood friend. She has remained pure and innocent, helps others and all that, and will almost certainly end up in heaven. I must therefore wait there for her.

>>3903128
A normal soul. You may enter the cycle of reincarnation in 50 years. Dismissed.

>>3903134
This is a common misunderstanding, mortal. Your soul does not belong to you. It belongs to your creators. You are to be called to account for all of your wrongdoings.

Black.

>>3903098
If you were so great, how come you were strung up and killed by a bunch of commie fucks and peasants?

I'll rape your ass so raw you'll shit blood for days

so now give me mah heaven

>>3903125
>implying Berlisconi is not Mussolini reborn

>>3903144

They jumped me bro.

>>3903096
A common misunderstanding, "I think therefore I am" is not true, the accurate thing to say is "there are thoughts".

Because Hell kicked me out for being too good.

Also, the universe has ended and so there's nowhere for me to reincarnate to.

>>3902790
stop spamming ur shitty board on ａ ｎ o ｎ t ａ ｌ ｋ . com ok thanks and a hav a good day

>>3903143
>>3903129
Do you not heed my words, post-displaced past self?! You act sinfully, judging others as you do! Your actions of damming on words alone is a henious crime, siding on an ambiguous and uncodified law which shows no demonstration of what is "right" or "wrong"!

>>3902794
This one time, I actually believed that what I was doing was good for everyone.

I already sold my soul to a god.

>what's a heaven

a miserable pile of angels.

>>3902794
Morality is subjective; there is no objective basis to it, people typically take theirs from the norms of the environment in which they grew up, or from people charismatic enough to influence their views. I never went against my own principles, even though these clashed with societies. Which is more than can be said for most people.

Because I've put up with enough crap in life. It'd be nice to have something good for once.

There is no heaven or hell

Your life is just a VN and once you GOOD/BAD END, your soul just enters another VN

>Souls
loldualism

Aww, Eiki-Sama looks so cute behind her big desk, Komachi just wants to hug her to bits!

>>3903194
What VN lets you commit suicide? I wouldn't mind playing

I'm a great guy.

>>3903191
Some people believe morality comes from God who gives a conscience to everyone mentally capable. Morality can be skewed because of upbringing but basic right and wrong is understood by everyone.

Depending on your belief in God of course.

>>3903221
Your tripcode betrays you. You wish for attention.

Black.

>>3903205
... Why are you here and why are you not doing your work?

>>3903236
Why do you keep ending your posts with "Black"?

I smell like bacon.

>>3903252
The souls I find to be righteous are given the color White, and may ascend to Nirvana. Souls not fit to even enter the cycle of reincarnation are given the color Black, and then sent to their ultimate fate, in one of the many hells.

>>3903250
Um, because it is em.. it is time for Komachi to prepare Eiki-Sama's evening tea! Yes!

Erm, also people are healthy and not many died today so Komachi thought she could take the day off.

>>3902792
stop spamming ur shitty board on ａ ｎ o ｎ t ａ ｌ ｋ . com ok thanks and a hav a good day

>>3903270
>take the day off

>>3903269
I judge you Infra-Red, for poor choice of colours.

>>3903299
I judge you neon purple.

Guess why.

Neon hasn't been a valid judgement adjective ever since the Fifth Circle was outsourced due to budget cutbacks.

Just send me wherever, anything's better than this Counter Guardian thing.

I don't need heaven if I'm still alive here with you.

>>3903194
If my life is a VN then whoever made it has a shitty script if he thinks sitting in bed on /jp/ for years is fun. When will I get to the harem of girls I can choose from?

>>3904797
You're still in the prologue

>>3903321
Isn't it that way of thinking that got you into this mess in the first place?

Because mewmewmewmew.

Because mommy told me that because I have blonde hair and blue eyes I am destined to be an angel.

Because hell's afraid I'll take over.

>>3902794

You have already made your decision. I would not be able to convince you otherwise no matter what I say. Whether it be heaven or hell, it doesn't really matter. I am dead, so I already failed.

Because I saved a kitten

Because I'm chelski fan too

>>3902794

Because you said I could get into heaven if you could suck my cock, that's why.

Did you forget what we did just five minutes ago?

WHAT IS THE LAW

>>3904871
Get out glory hunting scum.
You are doing something wrong if you don't support Flandre.