/jp/ - Otaku Culture

suck a nigga dick or somethin.

Explanations are necessary.

Kill myself and doom the world.

Can't we decide this with giant robots like mature adults?

Only if you wear school girl clothes

[GENUFLECT]

Is it a loli?

ORTORTORT

I'd suck a nigger dick or something

Dread of the Grave starts up as I slam her head into the Desk.

"That's impossible! The world can't end!"

And thus the game begins.

I tell her it's fucking "its" not "it's."

Don't worry, like Ren, ORT has a little girl from she assumes during sex.

Don't worry, like Ren, ORT has a little girl form she assumes during sex.

>>3245934
But she's speaking, how would you know that?

This bitch didn't have an appointment, she can rot in the waiting room. I'm a busy man, I can't see every whore who comes knockin'.

I accept and live happily ever after with her.

I have sexual intercourse with ORT. You know, for the good of mankind.

What kind of sounds will ORT make when she climaxes?

I pull out my black barrel and stick it in her mouth

Only if Ort is a Touhou.

Is she a virgin? This is important.

I would PARTY HARD

>>3245968
Of course she is.

>>3245968
You are her first vict-- err, partner.

>>3245942
Duh.
Just read the backlog.
Also, save.

Sounds like a TRUE END to me.

>>3245956
see
>>3245916

Watch the world end.

How could I say no to a "pretty lady"?

MORE INFORMATION IS NEEDED.

What color eyes and hair does she have?

It hardly seemed real. I had finally come face to face with the creature known as ORT. I had been warned that I would most likely be killed instantly, but events took a stranger turn.

"So... You're ORT? Impressive."
<YOU POSSESS IT.>
"It? What might that be?"
<THE GLAND. YOU POSSESS THE GLAND, HUMAN. IT DEMANDS THAT WE COPULATE WITHOUT DELAY.>
"I'm sure you're a nice... Person... But I'm not reall-"
<ENOUGH. INSERT YOUR HUMAN PENIS INTO MY GENITAL OPENING.>

With the strengh and power of a great white shark, one of ORT's tentacles shot out and tore my clothes from my body, while another stimulated my member.

"Jeez, is everyone on Mercury this forward? There'll be hell to pay if Arc finds out about this..."

Despite my protests, I was responding to ORT's caress. There was no avoiding it now.

"Are you ready?"
<PROCEED.>
"Um... Am I doing it right?"
<THAT IS MY LEFT NOSTRIL, HUMAN. TRY ONCE MORE.>
"How about... Here?"
<...ACCEPTABLE. DO NOT DELAY ANY LONGER, OUR GLANDS CALL OUT FOR ONE ANOTHER.>

I needed no further persuasion.

>>3246007
Step 1: Don't make eye contact
Step 2: Don't make body contact
Step 3: Say "No" loudly and clearly followed by "End of Discussion"

Grow some back bone.

ORT-tan

I thrust into the creature known as the strongest among the twenty-seven dead apostle ancestors with all my strength. Her tentacles quivered like the flesh of a mollusk. Again and again I penetrated the enormous creature. It was all too clear what would happen to me if I didn't satisfy the Type-Mercury.

<PERHAPS... HUMANS ARE NOT AS WORTHLESS AS I BELIEVED.>

If I didn't know better, I would have thought the creature was blushing.

"I'll show you not to take us lightly, ORT."
<I'D... LIKE TO SEE THAT!>

I held off my own climax with all my strength, my partner wouldn't tolerate such a failure. But soon enough, she had reached the same point as I.

"ORT... I'm..."
<DEPOSIT YOUR REPRODUCTIVE CELLS INTO ME, HUMAN!>
"Yes ma'am!"
I continued one with renewed vigor. I knew we were both close.

"Ugh... I'm..."
<YES.>

I shuddered as climax came at last, I shot my seed into what I had only guessed was her most intimate of places.

<SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
EEEEEEE!!>

Just then, my world went red. My eardrums had exploded under the force of ORT's cry of passion. As I lost consciousness, I prayed that my lover did not share the spider's habit of eating their mates.

>>3246018

That's not proper office attire.

Only if ORT can change into a little girl. I'm no fucking hero, if I have to have sex with a monster to preserve humanity, everyone else is just going to have to suck it up and think of an alternative plan.

>>3246019
>mollusk

Saw it coming for miles.

>>3246022
of course

>As I lost consciousness, I prayed that my lover did not share the spider's habit of eating their mates

This is funny because ORT is a spider with a Flying saucer on it's back.

>>3246030
UFO spider moe

>>3246030
Oh shit you guys NUE is ORT.

Three letters. Multiple limbs. Destructive moe.

It all makes sense.

>>3246035
Yui.

Three letters. Multiple limbs. Destructive moe.

>>3246035>>3246045

Doctor Gregory House.

Three words, moe, no tentacles.

>>3246045

>>3246045
Ran.

Three letters. Multiple limbs. Destructive moe.

That must've been one heck of a drink to find myself in Brazil.

I protest. Even in the Type Moon universe, I would be a NEET. Even more so if I was aware of vampires, 3d tsundere mages, and other random shit.

>>3246014
><THAT IS MY LEFT NOSTRIL, HUMAN. TRY ONCE MORE.>
This made me laugh so hard, I don't understand even.

Pierce her heavens.

SEX WITH A PLANET? GOLLY JOLLY

>>3246045
>>3246047
>>3246051

Good point! But they all lack UFOs.

ORT has UFO. NUE has UFO.

Coincidence? I THINK NOT.

>>3246106
Ran's tails are UFOS. Ultra Fluffy Objects

ORT is using a Touko doll as a body.

Would you still accept her?

>regular human
>stumble upon crystal valley

dead pretty quick i think

>>3246172
Oh shut up, dirty red.

>>3246172
>Would you still accept her?
Why the hell would that be a bad thing?

>>3246193
Looking pretty blueish to me

>>3246193

>>3246172

Feeling blue?

>>3246197
Because she's not the little girl.

clean blue

>>3246230
Or SUGOI SUGOI for that matter.

>>3246278
She's better than SUGOI SUGOI.

>>3246307
Shut up, dirty red.

hey babe, how 'bout you and I get married and end the world anyway.

I'd rather have Touko than ORT.

>>3246307
SUGOI SUGOI is a myth.

>>3246314
Can we at least agree that an Aozaki threesome would be a delightful thing?

>>3246331
but there's only two aozak

>>3246335
Yes. Two sisters, plus you.

[X] Cum inside

[X] Give birth to Multitype-Earth/Mercury

>>3246331

Just having sex with one of them would be enough to kill you, both of them at once would be a death sentence. A sexy death sentence.

>>3246339
And after all is said and done, there will be only two sisters.

>>3246346
You would die a very happy man.

>>3246355
The last thing you'll see is both of them bitching at each other. Not exactly a happy end.

>>3246355

I'd probably still be cumming even at the pearly gates.

>>3246360
They'd be arguing over which one made you climax.

>>3246376

Or whose turn it is to get rid of the corpse.

>>3246384
SUGOI TITS

>>3246411
>FLAT TITS

>>3246418
>I AM NOT SUGOI AT ALL

>>3245887
why do all types take the fom of women when they gain an earth based form?

Also I work at a pizzeria and weirder shit has happened.

>>3245887
How does planet know what marry is?

>>3246505
So you can have sex with them, of course.

Shits been weird ever since I dug up that ugly gun looking thing in my back yard man.

At times like this you just have to stop and think.
What would Rance do?

>>3246364
My corpse would still be cumming in whatever Aozaki I was fucking.

How the hell did I wander into something thats supposed to be in like africa or something?

Seriously I've gotten really really drunk before but never that drunk.