/jp/ - Otaku Culture

Who are you going to spend Valentines day with?

I hate to say it, but I'm going to be by myself this year. It seems like no one in Gensokyo even remembered to give me any valentines. Isn't that funny? I tried to ask Marisa about it but she said she was too busy and had some stuff to do at the Hakurei shrine. It's alright though, I've got Hourai and Shanghai to keep me company and we're going to make some valentines chocolate maybe just in case some one comes over and wants some chocolate. I'd really like if someone came over, just once. We could drink tea and have chocolate and I could show them my lovely doll collection. I want to show Marisa but she always says she's busy and has to go to the Hakurei shrine. I wonder what she does there? It must be quite an exciting place, but when I try to go there Reimu just tells me to go away and leave her and Marisa alone. It makes me feel a bit sad, but I can always come home and tell Hourai and Shanghai about it. They listen to me. They're good dolls. They never call Alice names like "creepy", "leaks poop" and "freak".

Still, this valentines day I wish I could have found out what it's like to hold someone. I once worked up the nerve to ask Marisa, but she said some horrible things she couldn't possibly have really meant and told me to play with my dolls. It must feel so nice to have someone in your arms. I bet it's really nice. Oh well, maybe next valentines day someone will come here and eat chocolate and we can try holding eachother. It's really curious that no one came this year, isn't it? I guess they were all busy, valentines isn't a holiday or anything. That's probably it. Lots of important stuff can come up on a day like today.

It must be wonderful to do small things like eat meals with another person around. It's usually so quiet around here, with no one coming to visit and me being alone all the time. I don't mind it so much, though. I have Hourai and Shanghai and all my dolls to take care of, and they keep me company even if they can't talk. Have I told you how good at listening they are? They'll just sit there and listen for hours to me talking about any little thing. I once tried having a long conversation with Marisa but after a few minutes she told me to shut up. I don't think she meant it though. She said she was busy and going to Hakurei shrine. I probably interrupted her from doing something important and she said some rash words that she didn't really mean.

Getting hugged must be great. I know you'll be surprised by this, but I've never been hugged. It seems like the kind of thing that would make valentines with another person nice. Isn't that funny? Little old me never having been hugged? I think it's kind of funny. I guess I'm just unlucky. I almost got hugged once but Marisa told the person who was going to hug me that I leak poop and then they didn't hug me. I felt a little bit sad but I suppose it's alright since it was just a joke.

I really hope I can spend this valentines day with Hourai and Shanghai. For some reason they haven't moved at all, and I'm a little bit sad because they're usually the only ones around besides me and it's hard to find anyone else to listen. It'd be nice to have them up and about because without their help the chocolate I'm going to make will turn out bitter, and that would be just awful if anyone happens to show up. I'm only a little bit sad, because I'm sure Hourai and Shanghai will get up again in time to make chocolate. Just in case anyone drops by. It's funny that no one's ever come by here, isn't it? Not even for valentines chocolates. Can you believe that? I've been here by myself for as long as I can remember. I even made a funny song about it. "The ground is down, the sky is up, and Alice is meant to be alone." Well, actually Marisa made the song about me.

It's a little bit dusty in here, isn't it? All this dust is making my eyes water. I guess I should clean up a little in case anyone comes to have chocolate on valentines day. It would be nice to have someone come. Maybe if they ate my chocolate they might like it enough to even try giving me a hug. It would be my first one. I think that would be really good. Hugging someone must feel so good. I don't leak poop, it's okay to hug me.

I guess I should start getting ingredients for the chocolate. I should get enough for everyone, just in case they all decide to come here and surprise me on valentines. I'll make lots of chocolate. I'm sure everyone will want some.

Nnnnn?

It was a quiet day in The Forest of Magic, just like every other day. The spring air flowed into the room through the open window, bringing with it a cool and refreshing breeze. A young girl was sitting elegantly at her desk, marveling the wondrous object that lay before her.

"I can't believe I let Nitori talk me into testing this thing out for her. It seems so complicated, I can't figure out what goes where and how to set it up. Oh heck, I can't even figure out how to turn it on!

Oh well, at least it was nice talking to someone, even if it resulted in something troublesome like this."

The young puppeteer sat perplexed on her chair, tinkering with the modern piece of technology. Alice was anxious and determined to get the device to work, and thus she didn't stop until late into the night. The refreshing breeze turned into a stiff wind and darkness flooded the house's insides. Noticing this, Alice stood up, lit a candle, and closed the large glass windows. When she sat back down, she noticed that the device was nearly set up, and all she had left to do was turn it on.

"Alright, I believe this button should do it.", she said with anticipation. To her excitement, the machine began to buzz and run, indicating that it was beginning to start up. Less than a couple minutes later, the screen of the strange device lit up with various icons and such. Alice remembered Nitori telling her that this was the "Desktop", whatever that was.

Eager to test out the device per her promise to Nitori, Alice put her hand on the mouse and started clicking frantically, until she realized that she was just clicking into empty space. She moused over an icon that she found quite interesting: a small blue and orange sphere. Below it was text that read "FireRan Browser".

*squeeze* S...Silly Anonymous...

"I wonder what this one will do if I click on it", pondered Alice. To her utmost enjoyment, as soon as she clicked on it her screen almost immediately changed completely. "Ah, this must be the Web Browser Nitori told me about. She said that this was probably the most popular feature of her invention."

In time, Alice got used to this new device Nitori called a "Computer", and eventually all the commands and whatnot would just come naturally as if she had been doing this forever. In that time, many other people took liking to this invention, including many people from the human village.

One day, Alice came across a website with lots of texts and images. When she asked Nitori about this, she said it was a Message Board, a place where people would post messages accompanied with images about various subjects. She noticed that one subject was very popular, a game called Uohuot, created by a man called NUZ. She later learned that this was what they called a curtain fire shooter, and that it was really popular in the human village. Alice decided to try these out for herself, as many people exclaimed how fun they were.

The first time she decided play, Alice was quite confused. First of all, she couldn't decide which character to chose. There were many, after all. Anon, John, Steve and Ryan were the main ones, with many side characters as well.

In the beginning, Alice wasn't very good, however as the days passed she got better and better and was eventually able to move up in the levels. However, one day Alice discovered that these shooting games weren't the only things about of this game called Ouhout. She also found out at the various doujins and fan-made comics existed, each one with great artwork and funny or dramatic story lines. Alice immersed herself in these stories, laughing at the hilarious jokes involving the stereotypes assigned to the characters, and sobbing at the stories of lost love and heartbreak.

Alice started developing a certain liking towards the character named "Anon", which was short for Anonymous. He was a lonely character who was always made fun of by everyone else. Day in and day out he was satirized and ridiculed, even though he tried his best to make friends with the others. As such, he spent almost all of his life inside his small, resolute home, practicing his Danmaku or reading manga. Although you couldn't see his face, you could tell that Anon was fairly attractive, which was a surprise considering his situation.

As time passed, Alice soon became infatuated with this heartfelt yet unbefriended character. She would fantasize being together with him, comforting him in his times of melancholy and going out together as an act of their love. She would lament over the though of being with him forever, enjoying themselves together, having kids, growing old as a couple, etcetera. She wanted to give him the love and appreciation that he desperately deserved, most of all because she knew exactly how he felt. It hurt Alice knowing how woebegone he must feel.

However, one day Alice came to an inconsolable realization. She realized that Anonymous was not real, and never would be real. She realized that both he and herself would be lonely forever, separated by 2dimensional and 3dimensional barriers. She realized that they would never be together, never share the beautiful view of the sunset, never hold hands while walking down a park trail, never have a peaceful picnic on the edge of the forest with a beautiful view of the lake.

"This isn't fair! This just isn't fair! Why can't he be real? Why has fate been so cruel, to present me with such a perfect man, only to be rejected by this barrier of woe, this realization of dismay?"

A single tear flowed down Alice's cheek, grazing her soft yet troubled face and shortly falling to the ground.

Alice cried herself to sleep that night, her hopes and emotions dashed, her future bleak and dim. Aside from the resolute sobbing, it was a quiet day in The Forest of Magic. Just like every other day. As such, it would stay that way forever...

Cuddle?....

>>285692
Don't worry, Alice. This anon loves you.

And once the Hardon Collider is finished, we'll finally be together.

>>285696
What are you *yawn* talking about?..

>>285696
>Hardon Collider

alice is mai waifu

i wish i could sage her to death.

>>285709
L-let's stay in b-bed a bit longer...

>>285709
She's mai waifu, too.

I bought her online.

http://www.paletweb.com/selectpage.asp?code=00788

>>285725
mmm, alice hug pillow..

Nnnnn...

BACK TO REALITY.
Alice is all alone, anon is all alone.
THE END.

>>285674
>>285678
>>285686
>>285689

fuck you ;_;

>>285752
*rustles*

>>285744
>BACK TO REALITY.
>Alice is a fictional characer, anon is a faggot.

....Anonymous?...

>>285775
I STILL LOVE YOU ALICE.

We're so much alike. We both like to collect dolls.

>>285781
dolls, not figures

>>285781
..There's something funny pressing against my tummy...

Wake up Alice, wake up.
Wake up and... smell the ashes.

>>285792
It's your doll.

>>285794

>>285794
SAKUYA

SAKUYA

ASSASSINATION STOP

ASSASSINATION STOP

>>285792
Large Hardon Colliding.

>>285797
Uuuu... um.. it's warm...

>>285808
Thats because it's a youkai doll.

>>285811

Promoted to head doll?

>>285816
>>285815
>>285811
um.. it feels like a stick...

..oh well... *squeeze*

>>285822
You're going nuts Alice. Just...

NUTS.

Alice you sure are naïve.

>>285836
What are you squeezing all the time?

>>285843
...Can't I give you a hug?...

>>285842
eh?...

>>285845
Not if it's not a real one.

in b4 DV alice copypasta

>>285870
I...I don't understand...

*brush brush brush*

A..anyway I should go make some breakfast...

Poor, naive Alice...

>>285919
Hey, Alice! I sure am glad you're here. I just got back from the Hakurei shrine, and I was talking to Suika while I was there. She gave me something that she says will make you look a whole lot prettier if I drink it.

Isn't that wonderful? Maybe I'll be able to look at your face when we have sex now.

>>285972
>>285967
eh?.. what is sex?

I'm sorry Alice we are fighting in your house and messing it up.

>>285972
Go die in a fire you...you...DOUBLE FAGGOT.

>>285972
Ha ha, oh wow.

>>285989
What?... Noooo....

>>285985
Don't waste that chocolate on a cake. Spread it on your thighs so I can lick it off.

>>286008
th..thighs? l..lick it off?...

w...well anyway I gotta go... so I left the cake on the table... I'll see you later!..

My work here is done. Good job Youmu.

>>286049

Damn right you're not gonna wake up, bitch!

I..I'm back for a little...

>>287613
MAI WAIFU

I'm sick of hearing you talk. Just die, Alice.

>>287613
While you were gone, Aya stopped by.. She showed me some pictures..

I'm disappointed in you, Alice. I thought you loved me.

>>287639
DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN

dan kim is awesome

>>287688

Sup Dan Kim

>>287639