/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>>13804087
worthy of what

>>13804087
I fucking hate Shikieiki. I'd try me best to go to Hakugyokurou with Yuyuko-sama.

Would Yama gas the kikes?

>>13804111
All day long.

>>13804094
> I'd try me best to go to Hakugyokurou with Yuyuko-sama.

>>13804091
Worthy of going to heaven, of course. What else does she judge?

>>13804120
She looks rather surprised that she's in underwear.

>>13804094
Only sinners hate the just. You're not a sinner, are you?

I'd give her a lecture on her flaws and shortcomings.

>>13804207
Touhou heaven is pretty shit. There's only 1 known character there.

>>13804207

Hey that's a really cool Jack Sparrow pic., dude.

Do you got any more?

>>13804308
>Touhou heaven is pretty shit. There's only 1 known character there.
Akyuu and Yukari speak pretty highly of it.

>>13804091
Her divine pussy.

>>13804087
...worthy?

Why, I'd FLIP OUT, of course.

>>13804308
Suika hangs out there, sometimes.

Falling asleep with the Yama!

Will she sent you to hell for whacking it to her?

>>13804452
Heaven's starting to sound pretty nice.

Though if she found me worthy, the standards must be really low.

>>13804258
I want her to judge the penis measurements of my /jp/sie tomodachis and I

>>13804742
What the fuck? Get the hell out of here degenerate.

>>13804751
Whoa, no need to get angry buddy! We won't laugh at your measurements

>>13804758
Fuck off you perverted shit.

>>13804765
The ranking of one's genital length is an important social practice among a group of males in order to establish a clear hierarchy in the group.

It's only as perverted as you want to make it to be. Also, I repeat: we won't laugh at your measurements

>>13804091
Her pantyhose-clad feet in your mouth.

>>13804774
>The ranking of one's genital length is an important social practice among a group of males in order to establish a clear hierarchy in the group.

>It's only as perverted as you want to make it to be. Also, I repeat: we won't laugh at your measurements

>>13804793
Holy shit did you hack my facebook

>>13804774
Society is based on the maintenance of illusions (eg hierarchy) .

99% of the time these illusions are highly immoral and also pathetic to higher beings.

>>13804838
Why would they be higher beings, if they don't believe in hierarchy?

Checkmate, atheists

>>13804855
>what are metaphors

>>13804865
A metaphor is useless if it's self-contradicting though

>>13804884
>muh annamay
>muh annamay

>>13804929
>>13804865
Who are you quoting?

Oh my lord. Can we just talk about the Yama?

>>13804963
I want to massage her sore bum after sitting in her hard yama chair all day working.

>>13804967
Don't say such lewd things!
Or do. It's not like she can control you.

>>13804998
I didn't mean it in a lewd way, honest. I used to have an office job a couple years ago and every day when I came home my bum was sore. And at least those chairs were cushioned, though the cushions weren't very good. I can't imagine how her bum would feel especially if she works more than 8 hours a day and her chair isn't cushioned very well.

>>13804087
I rape God's wife.

Love and respect the Yama.

She is trying to save your fucked up soul from this:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=46R03LQEAx4

>>13804087
I guess I go to heaven? I mean, that's what she judges souls for, right?

>>13805071
The Yama has nothing but your best interests in mind.


>>13805407
Yes, but it's not like it's immediate. You still need to physically travel there. You just won't be dragged anywhere like the soul of a sinner.

She takes her job pretty seriously, but Shiki Eiki is pretty cute, too!

>>13805441
I don't want to go to heaven. I want to stay back and be panda-eared Eiki's servant.

>>13805485
Who said that isn't its own kind of heaven? Maybe you even get to pet her and give her hugs!

>>13804087
>worthy

If this is the standard then i'll gladly skip straight to the reincarnation.

>>13805572
Well, all it really takes is not sinning. If that was obtained by never being given an opportunity, so be it.

>>13804258
But doesn't she only judge that when you die?

>>13804087
...how? I know for a fact I've sinned.

>>13805611
Maybe you are dead right now.

I tell her she must have made a mistake. There is no one more evil than I am.

>>13805873
Can you imagine
You've led a pure life, and the Lord Yama finds you worthy of Bhava-Agra
But alas, you decide to go out with a prank and keep insisting to Eiki that she's wrong, and you're one hell of a sinner.

The Lord Yama gets flustered and views your life again and again, slightly panicking - if her ability stopped working properly, she'd be out of a job.

Finally, she looks at your pure life so much she figures it out, but by the time she has already come to admire and fall for you.

>>13805895
If it were me, I'd be slightly annoyed and almost reconsider sending the guy to heaven instead of admiring and falling in love with him.

>>13804087
I wouldnt mind her judging me with those thighs.

>>13805930
To be fair, the Yama's working day is probably filled with monotony and disgust. A pure man would give her a much-needed break from both.

>>13805935
You're given a chance to go to heaven for free, anon. Don't screw it up by acting like a total pervert in front of the Judge.

>>13805895
Fuck off with your spoilers.

>>13806205

B-but it really is a spoiler for the end of the mini-story...

Nobody likes the Yama?

>>13809932
She's a cutie.

>>13809932
I like her (lack of) chest.

>>13804786
Sounds good.

>>13804555

>>13809932
She's kinda prickly, intimidating, hard to approach. She's cute and pretty, and nice and all, but still kinda scary.
She also makes me want to do some pretty terrible things.

>>13811503
Less scary and more annoying. She's supposed to be very friendly if a bit nagging. Eiki delivers lectures with a smile!

>>13812237
She's still scary because she's the judge of the dead and talks about hell and stuff, and her authority is intimidating.

>Not going to write your wish, Eiki-sama?
>Komachi, wishes are things granted through one's own hard work, you know?

>Then just write down what you want to work hard on. A wish to yourself.

>As I'm said to be scary even when I'm not angry, I wish for an image change.
>Shiki Eiki Yamaxanadu

>You're just adorable.
>E-...Enough with those unnecessary concerns!!
>You're super cute even when you're angry.
>You're lying!
>It's the truth.

Would it be possible to force Eiki to send you to heaven?

>>13813097
No, for two reasons. One, she's tremendously powerful and there's no realistic way for you to gain power over her, and two, she's just the arbitrator of divine law. Just because she says you're going to heaven doesn't mean anything if you didn't actually follow the law.

>>13813236
>One, she's tremendously powerful and there's no realistic way for you to gain power over her
Shush.

>she's just the arbitrator of divine law. Just because she says you're going to heaven doesn't mean anything if you didn't actually follow the law.
Nonsense! She's the Highest Judge of Paradise! If she says you're going to heaven, you're going to heaven, period!

Would you like to see a high-res image?
Or would you rather see individual skin cells?

http://gelbooru.com/index.php?page=post&s=view&id=1902962

>>13813279
>She's the Highest Judge of Paradise! If she says you're going to heaven, you're going to heaven, period!
Doesn't she have superiors, like Lord Enma?

>>13815747
All judges have the same influence in judging because they've all taken the name of Enma. Perhaps the original Ten, or maybe just King Enma, have additional bureaucratic influence, but who knows.

Also note that "highest judge of paradise" is simply a reiteration of the title Yamaxanadu. They mean the same thing.

Hugging the Yama while she's working!

>>13821062
Quit it.

>>13818607
>>13815747
Even if she has superiors, I can't see them snatching souls out of Nirvana and tossing them in hell, even if they were sent there erroneously.

>>13821106
No. I'll hug her whenever I want.

A feast and parry across the lands with all the not so bad or evil yokai

By breaking the law!!

if Yama-sama let me into paradise, I would kiss and suck on her toes, but if she deemed that too lewd, I would ask her if I could brush her silky pretty hair.

>>13805584
what is considered sinful to Shikieiki?
I am an idiot and do not know which religion she's from, please forgive me

>>13831132
Buddhist sins, generally. Attempting to injure or kill another, or conspiring to harm.

>>13804087
Worthy of what?

Has anyone on /jp/ considered becoming a monk?
My mom got a really cheap deal on an all inclusive holiday to China for about $1300 per person, and one of the places we're seeing is the Giant Wild Goose Pagoda, which seems to be a Buddhist temple of some sort. Apart from that, my only experience with monks was staying in a monastery for one night on Mount Koya. The monks there seemed extremely at peace with their lives and world, it was a nice quiet place, even in the streets. I suppose the only thing that's stopping me is my attempted hedonism with games, music and some material goods.

I'm sorry for blogging.

>>13831619
I've wondered about that too. But I don't speak chinese and it seems hard to get accepted into something like that as a foreigner.

>>13831478
thank you

>>13831132
http://www.virtuescience.com/defilements.html

As you can see, there's a lot. This is why Eiki's black-and-white way of looking at things is a problem; it's close to impossible to go through life without hitting at least one of those defilement.

>>13831619
You wouldn't last a week without internet.

>>13835358
Can I at least fap as a monk? Also they may have some books that I could read to learn about some Buddhist secrets.

>>13835347
sarcasm? oh man, there's no way I'm going to paradise...

>>13835358
Yes, I wouldn't be able to watch le epic anime of the month with the bros every week and meme all over the place with my reaction faces, I can't live without that.

>>13835512
iktf bruv

>>13835347
>This is why Eiki's black-and-white way of looking at things is a problem
It sounds more like you need to strive to become a better person.
There are those among heaven who have broken some of these 'defilements', after all, those above are jealously hoarding their space rather than letting more good people in. All you need to do is try and purify your karma during life.

>>13804932
>Who are you quoting?

>>13837081
How the hell did people like that get into heaven?

>>13837334
Dunno, but the rules aren't as strict as >>13835347 would have you believe. It's canon.

Yama is a healthy woman with natural desires!

>>13840694
Why does Shikieiki got a bird tail on her butt?

>>13804087
Can I have Komachi?

>>13837390
Prove it! Cite it!

>>13840318
Stop posting that.

>>13804786
I would tell her that I am not a filthy subhuman foot fetishist and accept going to hell for saying it.

>>13804087

the only way I can

>>13841084
Go play SWR. Tenshi is a Celestial and lives in heaven.
If she can get there, you can.

Or, go read PMiSS's section on celestials.

>>13841166
Wait, Tenshi's Heaven is that sort of Heaven? That's where the good dead people go? You sure about that...?

Genuflecting before the great and awesome Eiki, and kissing her toes in gratitude of her awesome and magnanimous mercy.

>>13841166
>If she can get there, you can.
That's pretty misleading, considering Tenshi didn't get to Heaven through any "legitimate" means. The whole point of her character is being raised in Heaven without having to do any of the work herself to get there.

>>13841505
There are a few different ways to get into Heaven, but yes.

>>13804087
There's one reason, and ONE reason only why the Yama would find me worthy - She's sexually frustrated to the max and needs help in this regard. It's all part of her plan.

http://exhentai.org/g/731915/a9f705e674/

>>13841591
Regardless, the residents of heaven are hoarding land to avoid having any new neighbors in heaven despite there being plenty of room. Does that sound virtuous to you?

>>13841617
Well that's just unlikely to the extreme, sinner. She may have to do something about that.

>>13842040
I don't masturbate, except when I see this image. Thanks, fag.

>>13804774
>It's only as perverted as you want to make it to be.
>I repeat: we won't laugh at your measurements
Call me Wright, cus I've found a contradiction.

>>13841994
I wasn't disagreeing, just pointing out that Tenshi was a bad example to begin with. Touhou as a whole is filled with hypocrisies, egotism and shiftiness, and that's part of why it's so interesting.

>>13804786

>>13842834
Get out of her precinct.