/jp/ - Otaku Culture

How do I impress that mershark beach bully so she’ll date me?

>>44167976
I'm going to the one place that's free of Elvish scum. SPAAAAACE I mean, underwater.

>>43962012
Is this blue enough for you, little fish?

>Friends dare me to swim out and touch the buoy
>Ezpz
>Even climb up it to showboat
>Cut myself on the way down
>Just a tiny one
>Doesn’t even hurt
>Hear 4/4 String Ostinato in D minor for some reason

>Be me
>Pasty dork that shuns the sun
>Get dragged to the beach by friends/family
>Don't like sand, it's coarse, rough, irritating, and gets everywhere
>Go into the water instead
>Walking/floating around in the shallows
>Having an okayish time. Not that bad.
>Suddenly something touches my leg
>Panic and flail around
>Look around. Nothing
>Hear something behind me. Giggling?
>Turn around. Still nothing.
>Something taps my shoulder.
>Shriek out and flail again.
>Look around.
>STILL. NOTHING.
>Try to calm down. Go back to floating. Time passes.
>See a shape or something on the surface of the water
>Jolt upright. Notto disu shitto again.
>The shape disappears under the surface.
>It's quiet. Too quiet.
>Suddenly something big bursts from the water right in front of me
>Too fast for me to react
>It grabs on to me and pulls me under
>Brain freezes up due to panic.

>>35473770
She looks all innocent now, but the moment you jump into the water is the moment her predator instincts take over, and she powers over you with a domineering passion, pounding your pelvis into the sea floor

>>34056908
Some of them

>>32990362
a?

>>32611925
Imagine making love with a mermaid in a boat like that. Imagine if it was a soft, bed boat. It doesn't matter where the boat goes. You live underwater with her anyways. You just make love with her inside, nonstop. During the day, in the evening, at night as the flickers of the lamplight flames dance across the water. Even if it rains, you keep going. Everyone can see you. But you don't care; you're in your own little world with her. The boat eventually tips over from the rocking back and forth, and you make love underwater right there.

>>29326219
Mersharks are the best aquatic wives

>Go to a grand casino built partially in the sea and on an island
>Looking to play poker and just have a good time
>Lose all your money to mershark cardshark on the first day

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>>23616065