/jp/ - Otaku Culture

>Druella, people are making fun of us online again! We must call for aid!
Who will come? Elves? Dwarves? Us lilim are not so lucky in our romantic exploits as them. The old alliances of virgins are dead.
>Deonora will answer!
Deonora?! Where was Deonora when monsters started calling us Dorks?! Where was Deonora when the foxes closed in around the single men!? Where was Deonora-

>I am the very model of a modern major general

Guys I need your help.
My childhood demon friend has an action figure of Druella with over 100 recorded magictastic voicelines and has dynamic joint action and a glowing "demon lord power!" button on her back. She is convinced that Druella could beat Power Paladin in a fight (she couldn't). I gave her my Power Paladin figure to admire (so she'd realise she's wrong), but I got it back the next day and it was covered in mini lipstick marks and she'd painted a silly looking blush onto his face. This is an outrage.
What should I do to make her realise that Power Paladin could stomp Druella in a fight?

Good morning wurm your honor
the crown will plainly show the hero who now stands before you
was caught red handed showing feelings
showing feeling to a very scaly monster...
this will not do.

>>44603941
>Be diplomat to Lescatie, get to meet Droo Droo herself
>"It's an honor to meet you Druella, women of your STATURE are in SHORT supply"
>Grips table in annoyance, but smiles nonetheless
>"It's hard to find one who could MEASURE up to you"
>Gnashes teeth
>"I just have a SMALL thing I want to raise about the SCALE of your military build up - something I have written at LENGTH to you about"
>Openly tells me she is going to invade if I say one more thing
>"Please, your eminence, this is not the time for SHORT sightedness
>Get invaded
fuck

THAT'S IT. I'VE HAD IT WITH YOU HUMANS AND YOUR STUPID NAMING CONVENTIONS. HER NAME IS NOT MISS APOPHIS, OR MISS LILIM, OR MISS WHATEVER. WE HAVE NAMES! HOW WOULD YOU LIKE IT IF I CALLED YOU MR HUMAN? HUH?

Tremble you weaklings cower in fear
I am your ruler, land, sea, and air
I want your girth, erect and standing tall
I'm a demon realm spreader, I am Druella

REMEMBER ME ANON? WHEN I ALPED YOUR BROTHER. I TALKED. JUST. LIKE. THIS!