/jp/ - Otaku Culture

mii.. sex? what is that?

Rika Rika

Of course Hinamizawa is populated by demons. Regular humans couldn't possibly live within a ten mile radius of Furude Rika and her erotic body without instantly reaching L5 of the Uoohhhh Syndrome. Only an inhuman demon or a Buddha who has cast off all desire could resist the overpowering urge to perform lewd acts on Rika-chan. A single glimpse of her loose, nearly transparent dress or the alluring hip windows of her hakama is enough to drive 90% of the blood in an adult male's body into his genitals. According to experimental data, exposure to Rika-chan in her "punishment game" state would be enough to cause death through rupturing of the genital arteries.
In fact, the Japanese government has created a secret procedure to be enacted should Rika-chan ever be exposed to those who do not reside in Hinamizawa, entitled Emergency Manual R34, which contains provisions necessary to contain the threat to sanity, good decency, and public morals that Furude Rika-san represents to the public. Only the possible outcry against such an inhumane act has prevented them from enacting it in the past, but soon they will reach the deadline known as "Rika-chan's middle school graduation" and be forced to choose between unleashing the WMD-level threat of Rika's erotic aura on the unknowing public and enacting a horrifying procedure which would remain shrouded in secrecy for all time to protect the reputation of the government.
It may be too late, however. Rika-chan's aura is growing stronger day by day and it is reported than under laboratory conditions, she was able to infect new victims with a unique memetic parasite capable of reducing a rational man to an animal-like state of lust simply through the electronic transmission of recorded samples of her voice. The subject of the experiment, which the government denies all knowledge of, was transported to Hinamizawa in secret and abandoned in a rice field, reportedly ranting about "child erotic touchy tummy" while rocking back and forth on the ground.
Truly, the world is fortunate that Furude Rika-san was born in a village populated entirely by inhuman demons with no ability to notice her budding chest, shapely hips, slender legs, or silky hair. Were it not so, the scientific community at large shudders to imagine the catastrophic consequences on the human race.