/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

[Anonymous No.5074191]

Does this look professional?

By professional I mean is this comic art comparable against big graphic novel titles, I've seen some pretty awful looking comics made by professionals but I'm really asking if this compares to artistically well respected comics and not just comics in general.

I'm currently experimenting with different colouring types, I'll most likely go with gouash but I'm yet undecided.

I'll post some colourized pages later.

[Anonymous No.5074193]

[Anonymous No.5074196]

>>5074191
No, but you should keep doing it because you'll get better with experience.

[Anonymous No.5074208]

I'll post some pages that don't really have any fancy perspectives or anything because mist pages don't look like those two.

[Anonymous No.5074210]

>>5074191
>>5074193
all i can say is that if i walked into a comic book store and saw this, i would not think that it is not professional.

I don't know if it's "good" or not, but it definitely doesn't overall look beg (although there are some things that IMO could be improved, like the perspective of the mouth of >>5074191, which i think looks more sideways than the rest of the face, and the folds of the clothes of the guy upside down look a bit weird.)

nice job

[Anonymous No.5074216]

>>5074191
Architecture lacks details here and there, some lines could be smoother but for a comic book it's not critical.
You biggest problems seem to be clothing and gesture. With anatomy on the side.
Clothing seems downright horrible with nonsensical folds everywhere - it's much better to lower the amount of folds that you do in ink and just define the main volumes, especially if you are going to colour it later.

[Anonymous No.5074220]

>>5074196
Thanks, could elaborate on why exactly?

I feel like the biggest flaw is the stiff and at times inaccurate anatomy but I'm working on that a lot, if it's the empty and minimalist environment then that's.actually intentional because the story is set in such place.

[Anonymous No.5074224]

>>5074210
>>5074216
Alright, creases and folds noted.

I can see exactly what you mean, that can be corrected later thankfully so I can get back to these pages once I've improved.

I've been drawing for only 2.5 years so there's still a lot that I need to figure out.

[Anonymous No.5074228]

>>5074191
>>5074193
>>5074208
You're certainly right there are some terrible looking comics out there, but even mediocre draftsmanship can be redeemed by good inking/coloring. You should give those a shot as well

Your fur is a bit boring to look at and your characters aren't that appealing, sorry. Unironically go looking for some good furry art and see how they do it. Unsurprisingly, they've gotten really good at making fully furred characters look appealing and soft. They don't draw every hair, but individual tufts at specific locations.

A other thing to look out for is your clothing. The clothing you posted screams that you never really studied it and don't properly know how cloth folds. Personally I find clothing study far more enjoyable than anatomy, and it will also make it easier for you to design costumes/outfits.

For the good: Your composition is pretty good, and perspective is good enough. Give the background details some more love and less straight ruler lines. Your lettering is great, just try to stay consistent between bubbles and free text. Just keep it consistent per character, you don't have to just choose one.

Finally, read pic related and 'Making Comics' . You won't regret it.

[Anonymous No.5074236]

>>5074220
Anatomy and form mainly. I also agree with >>5074210 clothing could use some work too. Backgrounds look good to me though. Not bad, but not professional.

[Anonymous No.5074248]

>>5074236
>>5074228
>Your fur is a bit boring to look at and your characters aren't that appealing

I've received lots of mixed opinions on this, it's a stylistic choice that doesn't appeal to some.
Personally I prefer the simplified fur.

>A other thing to look out for is your clothing. The clothing you posted screams that you never really studied it and don't properly know how cloth folds

My folds and creases are definitely shit-tier, that's for certain

>Give the background details some more love and less straight ruler lines

This is a stylistic choice, the world is supposed to look sterile and artificial at this point in the story.
Later on this will change but right now.I don't have anything to show of that.

I've read making.comics, it's pretty good.

>>5074236
What aspects of the anatomy?

Sometimes I make the arms too long and heads too large but aside from that I haven't noticed other issues.

The anatomy isn't supposed to look human but simply bipedal primate, ai want them to look obviously alien and not too anthro.

It's not an excuse for bad anatomy though as basic rules still apply to any mammals but it does explain some things that might look off.

[Anonymous No.5074266]

You're off to a good start, but you're not quite there yet
The uniform line width makes everything look somewhat draft-like, you need to use thicker line widths to define the outlines of objects of importance and thinner line widths for detail work
The cityscape looks quite mechanical - stick to using conventional perspective of course, but don't be afraid to loosen up your drawing style

[Anonymous No.5074269]

>>5074193
This page looks pretty good. The style is kinda funky, but it gives off that indie comix sort of vibe. I don't think it's anything that would get published by Dark Horse or Marvel or whatever, but an independent publisher might pick it up once you tie it down. In the OP pic the writing on the signs is very childish looking, if your penmanship isn't very strong I'd leave the signs blank and do the lettering digitally.

[Anonymous No.5074272]

>>5074266
Do the environments look sterile and soulless in your opinion?

[Anonymous No.5074277]

>>5074269
I'd prefer to improve until I'm good enough, that's actually a fixed version of a page I did a long time ago so the sign used to look even worse.

I'll do some excercises related to that and see what I can come up with.

[Anonymous No.5074289]

I'll ask the /co/ board about this later because I feel like readers who don't do art but appreciate it might have a different way of judging the art.

The problem is just that /co/ isn't really a good place for that so does anybody here know of any comics forums or sites where I could ask readers for an opinion?

[Anonymous No.5074294]

>>5074289
damn that building looks pretty sick. looks like a tremendous amount of work though

check will weston's stuff if you want to learn how to draw clothes. He has a course on drawing costumes and explains how to draw folds. You absolutely need to study this because you'll be drawing clothes all the fucking time. Learning folds and clothes in general is pretty enjoyable so you shouldn't put it off.

[Anonymous No.5074302]

>>5074294
I'm actually supposed to go and hang out with a good friend of mine who's a fashion design student this wednesday so I'll ask for a lesson while at it, I'll check out that guy too though.

I do recall her pointing out that the clothes in my.comic are really shit now when I think of it, completely forgot about that because for some reason people only artists seem to pay attention to that aspect.

[Anonymous No.5074307]

Thanks for all the feedback btw.

If this thread isn't locked by next wednesday I'll post some sketches and concepts related to clothes.

[Anonymous No.5074348]

Also,

Hypothetically speaking if the story, lore and characters were really good and the setting was unique, would this art be plausible and possibly be forgiven and compensated for by these other elements?

[Anonymous No.5074383]

>>5074307
>If this thread isn't locked by next wednesday
>locked

[Anonymous No.5074387]

GMI, man.
I think colours will make or break how interesting your comic is on a attention grabbing basis. Not a fan of the little animal people but if you want to roll that way thats for you.

[Anonymous No.5074416]

>>5074383
I don't know 4chan terminology, I only visit a foreign language image board so I just directly translated that.

>>5074387
It's a conic about aliens, it's a very important plot device here?

The comic is about an alien child who's put into a coma on a distant planet in luyten's start system and then sent to Mars where he wakes up in the wake of adulthood, the journey took 112 years and the first batch of aliens were sent to Mars ~60 years prior.

Mars was nostly colonized by corporations so they didn't follow earth laws and regulations much.

The first batch of these aliens were unable to speak and were mentally impaired so they were assumed to be a lower life form that was sent to humans by the aliens they made a deal with.

Later turned out that they were actually intelligent and these companies would try to hide it, fast forward a generation an aline who had received military training started a revolution and established a socialist shithole on Mars and drove out all the humans which eventually leads to a cold war standoff with biological nad nuclear weapons which where this story begins.

The whole point of the story is that none of these historical things matter and the personal journey is really what it's about, it's about finding purpose in 60's counterculture way (drugs/psychedelics).

Mars sucks despite being a welfare state and the protagonist doesn't take any of it granted and begins to immediately question everything that the locals view as normal.

[Anonymous No.5074421]

>>5074416
*the first batch arrived 60 years prior*

[Anonymous No.5074430]

So basically it's a comic about aliems getting shit faced on a shitty planet while trying to find a purpose in the midst of a constant threat of nuclear annihilation.

Also the aliens began colonizing and annexing settlements on Venus when they became wealthy so they're not portrayed as victims here, the whole point of it is that their government uses their history as a.prppaganda tool to justify atrocities.

[Anonymous No.5074432]

>>5074430
need a ton more work on scene setup and drawing the faces correctly at angles

[Anonymous No.5074434]

I'm going for retro futurism with the designs.

[Anonymous No.5074438]

>>5074432
What do you mean by scene setup?

[Anonymous No.5074440]

Why are the aliens so.. furry? You,re looking for a particular kind of audience for your comic?

But still, it looks way better than the crap you have posted on some other forums :D

[Anonymous No.5074455]

>>5074440
If some furfag out there wants tocjack of to these creatures then good for them but furries don't really have any influence outside of internet forums and I'm not trying to make it on the web at all so doesn't really matter.

I find bulb headed green men and human looking "alens" that just have some stupid unnecessary body parts attached to them overused for aliens in pop culture.

Besides, people don't give two shits when they see a fish suffering but if it's a cute puppy everyone loses their shit so I figured that the obvious way to go would be to have aliens that would be considered cute.

I don't know what you mean by me havibg posted some worse stuff on other forums.

Pic related, I don't like aliens that look ugly and weird for the sake of looking alien instead of simply looking like a hypothetical species that resembles ones that we already know of.

Ooks nähny näit töherryksii yliksel vai kui? :D
Siel ulistaa aina jos postaan jotain mut se johtuu muista syistä, suomalaiset on kyl perseest et ihsm.

[Anonymous No.5074461]

>>5074455

Why so racist?

[Anonymous No.5074472]

>>5074289
anyone that doesn't do art won't appreciate the work you put in. btw practice anatomy and clothing.

[Anonymous No.5074475]

>>5074461
Koska kokemukset ja tieto paremmasta, mä en sovella tätä yleistettyä mielipidettä kaikkiin niiden kansalaisuuden perusteella mutta suomessa on poikkeuksellisen paljon vittumaisia ihmisiä mun mielestä, samasta syystä sompuilla on huono maine vaikka niistäkin poikkeuksia aina löytyy, sama suomalaisissa.

[Anonymous No.5074478]

>>5074472
>practice anatomy and clothing.

Will do

[Anonymous No.5074485]

It's certainly not "professional" looking but it's certainly ambitious. The buildings, facial expressions and vehicles look great for the most part, and you do know some fundamentals of paneling. The anatomy and gesturing is not very good though. For comics, gesturing is the most important part to learn because gestures tell the story. You can have bad everything else like ONE and still make bank.
Your design choice for your alien race is weird for the purposes of comic making and as a hypothetically real race. They have small feet and hands so it's hard to read some actions, like the captain pointing his finger in Pic 3 Panel 6 and the MC dropping the statue in panels 1 and 2 of picture 4. the tarses of the aliens are small and yet they stand as if they were bigger; this messes with the anthropomorphism of whatever animal this creature evolved from. The aliens don't look human enough, and they don't look alien enough.
For gesturing, the shoulders of your characters are too stiff. When humans raise their arms or have them in front of their body, it changes the shape of their shoulders. Also, you consistently have your characters necks not parallel to their spine, eg. when the MC is drooping forward in picture 6 his head is still held high, the back most lunch buddy in picture 5 is the same way, and the same with the scientist in pic 7.
There's some inconsistencies in the paneling. For your second picture, the position of the viewer in panel 5 has changed so that the view of the doorway is unobstructed. There's no reason for this, since the viewer's perspective remained the same between panels 4 and 5. A similar situation happens in picture 6 in the bus, where the view is shifted rightward to cut out that mouthbreather the MC sits next to.
These flaws are the reason why this draft does not look professional to me, but with your work ethic these are trivial problems that can be grinded out. Good luck on your journey, with that ambition you're GMI.

[Anonymous No.5074498]

>>5074485
Thanks, that was some top tier critique.

I'll try to figure out the anatomy and gesture better, I can modify the older pages later once I've gotten better.

This is actually the third version because the art looked utter shite and I figured it would be easier to just redraw everything, right now I feel like the art is good enough to be modified later on instead of havibg to redraw everything so having easily fixeable flaws isn't a problem as long as I can figure out how to get better before getting to the colouring phase.

[Anonymous No.5074503]

>>5074475

Sairas äijä että vertaa suomalaisia somppuihin vakavalla naamalla. No ei muuta kuin onnea ja menestystä. Muista vihata suomea

[Anonymous No.5074516]

>>5074485
>The aliens don't look human enough, and they don't look alien enough

Well, wouldn't that actually compliment the setting since at this point in time the aliens have been normalized for humans so there's supposedly nothing alien about them anymore since it's just a species that happens to live alongside humans?

Our current way of seeing an extraterrestial species as something of a fantasy is seen as a historical outdated way of thinking just like to us the way northern europeans considered sub saharan africans freaks of nature when they lacked the understanding of what caused their cosmetics differences and vice versa.

[Anonymous No.5074521]

>>5074503
Ei vittu äijä onki sommi, mä tiesin :D

Suomi on ihan vitun turha ja kulttuuriköyhä maa, suomi oli euroopan somalia ennen kuin neuvostoliiton kauppa toi vaurautta.

Suomi on ollut ihan täys merkityksetön persereikä ennen 70-lukua ja silti suomenruotsalaisille on kiittämiatä lähes kaikesta kunnianarvoisesta vaikka onkin vähemmistö :D

Sibelius, kansallissäveltäjäkin oli hurri :D

Ota se pää ulos perseestä ja hyväksy se tosiasoa että suomi on turha maa ja se stereotypia naapurikateasta pirjosta jonka maailmankuva rajoittuu kanarian ja turkin pakettimatkoihin ja kouvoöan keskustaan on oikeasti se millainen keskiverto suomalainen on.

Huutista sommille :DDDDD

[Anonymous No.5074525]

>>5074348
>Hypothetically speaking if the story, lore and characters were really good and the setting was unique, would this art be plausible and possibly be forgiven and compensated for by these other elements?
Yes. Check out One Punch Man's webcomic. If those things are good enough, artwork quality will not prevent success.

[Anonymous No.5074540]

>>5074503
Ainiin ja sanonpahan vielä et sä just todistit olevas rasisti joten turha ulista rasismista, jälleen yksi syy minkä takia suomalaiset on perseestä :D

On muuten ihan vitun rasistinen maa mutta te vinkuvat läskit ootte niin munattomia että ei uskalleta olla avoimesti :D

Sä vahvistat munmielipidettä suomalaisista, ei siinä mitään kyllä mä silti olen varma eträ niitö pikkkeuksellisia hyviäkin ihmisiä on mutta ne.onkin poikkeuksia

[Anonymous No.5074547]

>>5074521
>>5074540
is this the alien language from the comic

[Anonymous No.5074546]

>>5074521

Huh ootpa vihanen :D Sorry if I bothered you, no need to go crazy.

[Anonymous No.5074548]

>>5074191
The legs and ass look stiff, move them into the. perspective.

>>5074193
Looks better but the text is not properly integrated

[Anonymous No.5074549]

>>5074191
It's very barebones, they look like WIPs. They need value applied to help develop focus points and page flow.
Don't think of it terms of "professional" and "amateur". The distinction is only that one makes his living from it and the other does not. They are not grades of quality. This art is enough if the story is interesting, since it's still fairly easy to tell what's happening which is, frankly, all you need for a successful comic.

[Anonymous No.5074552]

Fuck Finland

I could tell this guy was a finn based on just a few lines of text he shat out, what's even less surprising is that the guy turned.out to be racist.

I'm 1/2 Finnish but I honestly hate the place and the people there are generally socially autistic and bitter sociopaths, I just can't relate to them at all and the constant racism I have to put up with has really taken its toll on me.
When I lived in Estonia I never had this problem, they absolutely hate Finnish people though.
Finns go to Estonia to fuck prostitutes, buy alcohol and rape local women while wreaking havoc.

Aga ma armastan Eestii, sommid voib mine perse :D

[Anonymous No.5074557]

>>5074552
>the people there are generally socially autistic and bitter sociopaths
sounds kind of like 4chan, you must feel at home there

[Anonymous No.5074566]

>>5074546
Turha säätää mun kaltaisten idioottien kanssa, mee vaan sinne laudalle parempien ihmisten sekaan ulisemaan neekereistä ja kiusaamaan muita koska et halua että joku muu tekee jotain poikkeavaa :D

Vitun pelle :D

[Anonymous No.5074571]

>>5074557
It's not as bad as ylilauta.org though, it really isn't

[Anonymous No.5074598]

>>5074547

No, the guy with the comic is well known animal sadist torturer and narsistic sick fuck on finnish imageboards.

[Anonymous No.5074616]

>>5074598
Ai sä oot se äijä :D

Pitihän se arvata et oot joku epäonmistunu wannabe taiteilija joka on vaan niin vitun katkera ja epävarma että sitä pitää projisoida muihin :D

Tukehdu kyrpään ja mee vittuun tästä langasta jos kerta ei kiinnosta mun jutut :D

>>5074547
No point in even trying to explain what's going on, you wouldn't get it

[Anonymous No.5074618]

>>5074598
Vittu sun enkku on paskaa, ootko amis? :D

[Anonymous No.5074740]

>>5074616

Kuka äijä? Turha nyt derailaa sun lankaa sen enempää. Kunhan heitin pari ideaa ilmoille, niin äijä alkoi heti fronttaamaan :D

Muutenkin varmaan vituttaa näitä kansainvälisiä lukijoita lukea tätä '''soomi'' änkytystä.

[Anonymous No.5074760]

>>5074740
Postaa sun piirustus

[Anonymous No.5074768]

>>5074760

En suoraan sanottuna kehtaa koska tunnist'd kuumotukset.

[Anonymous No.5074769]

>>5074191
>>5074193
No.

[Anonymous No.5075124]

>>5074455
These things are not cute man they look really fucked up
they look like disgusting shelter chihuahuas that lived on the street for years

[Anonymous No.5075207]

>>5074516
It doesn't compliment the setting. What I meant by that statement was that the alien's weird features like their stance and cat head serve no physiological purpose as to keep them. I'm in the opinion that the comic would look better if either they had regular hands and feet so real life readers can relate to them better, or make them more catlike so that their evolution went somewhere else because of the special conditions of the planet (is it cold and that's why they have so much hair? They need to jump a lot so that's why they have powerful legs?). Art isn't art without purpose, and I don't see good reasons on why their hands are so small or why they stand so weird at the moment.

[Anonymous No.5075239]

>>5074193
work on your lettering. it's not consistent. i do like that you try to write it yourself though. but text is clearly an afterthought for you... getting better page layouts could also help with cleaning up the paneling mess you show

[Anonymous No.5075261]

>>5074455
i agree with >>5075124 these things are not at all cute.

i honestly thought the uglyish stylization was due to a desire to make things more grungy and edgy and visually fucked up, to accompany the whole sterile world setting. purposefully grotesque. no idea how you find them cute.

anyhow the characters look like furry things i'd expect to find on dA or furaffinity or some shit. so no, the art doesn't look professional, and it definitely isn't comparable against big graphic novel titles. some of the bulidings you've got are very intricate, but the rest of the scenes aren't good.

however, if you're making an amateur webtoon or webcomic, you could still make one anyway. people doing comics tend to improve over time (or fail) and your first concept for/attempt at anything is unlikely to be your biggest success.

>>5074348
maybe. things with shit art have succeeded based on story before. it isn't impossible, albeit unlikely.

[Anonymous No.5075345]

>>5074485
WTF????????? IS THAT CAT DANCING LIKE HUMANS?????? WTFFFFFFF????

[Anonymous No.5075450]

>>5074191
Negative.

[Anonymous No.5075451]

1/3

>>5075124
>>5075207
>>5075261
It's actually really interesting that you mention this because this is that one thing which clearly causes a huge divide between artists and non artists, I've done extensive research outside of the internet on this subject and nothing else seems to cause as much divide as this.

By extensive I mean having asked 100+ people about this, artists, non artists who read conics and people who don't read comics at all.
People who neither read nor draw have rarely given any useful feedback, literature enthusiasts being the only exception.

Most aspects had some trends but only two had very clear polarizations which are the design of the characters and minor flaws.

I've never asked anyone directly if the characters were cute but people just started saying that out of nowhere so often that there was clearly a general opinion on it, especially women pointed that out and statistically they seem to like the design a lot more than men.
Artists often say that I've succeeded in making all the characters look different while people who can't draw always tell me that they can't tell the characters apart.

I actually spoke to a professional Belgian old school conic artist about this and he actually redesigned the protagonist giving him human hands and feet and making him look more cat-like, I immediately disliked the design myself so I decides to ask people what they though about it and the general opinion was that the human feet and hands looked really creepy while the character looked like a cartoon animal and not really an alien which wouldn't compliment the setting at all.

I asked one non-artist guy who's a film and literature hobbyist why is it like this and he suggested it might be because artists follow design choices based on learnt principles and preset preferences while I only cared about making the characters clearly aliens while retaining some level of humanity in the design.

[Anonymous No.5075455]

>>5075451
2/3

I've also noticed that non artists don't really mind the feet, it seems to give people the assumption that these creatures are not supposed to be humans or animal characters but aliens.
The design with human anatomy made people assume that it was just a cartoon animal that dodn't distinctly look like any specific animal, non artists really didn't like it.

The whole idea behind the design came to me before I knew how to draw because the aliens we see in pop fiction just didn't do it for me, the design choices such as paneling and characters were decided on before I became an artist so these aspects are a product of a non artist's preferences.

As some already pointed out here, non artists barely care about the art.
This is true, I've noticed that artists view the art as mostly mediocre while non artist comic readers find it really good and unique.
Non artists who don't read comics usually can't form any opinions on it, to them it just looks like a comic.

Whenever I ask my non artist friend for critique on a page he would usually say if something looked weird but never explain what would be the cause of, say, a character's arms looking "weird".

I also get told a lot that what I sometimes see as mistakes don't look incorrect in the eyes of non artists at all, what's also interesting is that people who work and own art galleries, strictly fine art enthusiasts find my art much more appelaing than illustrators and comic artists.
They actually follow the same patterns as non artists generally with the difference being surprised for how "good" the art looks for a comic because they seem to have a generalized view of comica being stick figures and blob faced anime characters.

Personally I don't particularly consider these aliens cute, I just consider it as a good design for aliens that doesn't follow a common design choice.

[Anonymous No.5075460]

>>5075455
3/3

The absolutely worst critics besides non artist non readers so far have been professional comic artists, they seem to completely disagree with everything that readers clearly like and appreciate while focusing too much on aspects that non artists clearly don't care about at all.

Based on my research I've concluded that non artists are best critics for design choices and overall appeal of the art style while artists are the ones who can point out flaws in the anatomy and other technical stuff that non artists just see as looking off but not being able to tell what causes it to look weird.

I think that there's a clear disconnection between the people who make comics and those who actually read them, the design choices have received very positive feedback from non artists with the only exception being many saying that the characters look stiff and doll-like but that because my gesture and anatomy sucks but luckily that can be learnt and fixed later on.

Another thing is the issue with furries, non artists are very divided on it while artists almost always see it as a furry thing.
Non artists who are below 20 assume it's a furry comic atraight away but only the ones who visit internet forums a lot, people who just know of their existance because they've seen one youtube video about never seem to make that connection which includes most people between the ages 30-40.
Middle aged and older people don't even know what furries are and they always instantly assume that these characters are aliens and mot anthro animal characters, this is something that so far hasn't seen any differing opinions.

The weird anatomy makes people assume that they're aliens but this only applies to non artists who's views haven't been biased by the furry fandom.

I haven't asked any furries about this as I've never actually come across any in real life, I should though.

Btw I never do these interviews and only on three occasions have asked people to give feedback on it online.

[Anonymous No.5075474]

On /co/ people actually liked yhe design of the aliens I was very surprised that only a small handful of people assumed in was furry because the style doesn't look like something furries make, if these characters had himan anatomy however I feel like the furry bias might have a much stronger effect which would not be desireable.

From the beginning I always knew that furries would be a problem so I figured a distinct look that wouldn't look too furry-like would be for the best.

[Anonymous No.5075480]

[Anonymous No.5075689]

What's going on here? no really, there's a Finnish guy with a shity comic, and a half Finnish guy who says the other Finnish guy is an zoo sadist, and they both keep switching to Finnish mode, can anyone illuminate this situation for me?

[Anonymous No.5075695]

Ur so clean

[Anonymous No.5075787]

>>5075451
>>5075455
>>5075460
i cant comment on your research, all i can say is that i like your enthusiasm/work ethic and hope that you make it. Good luck

[Anonymous No.5075803]

Huutista. Ylilauta =/= Suomi.

Tekosyysi etsiä palautetta paskalta laudalta joka on nykyään täynnä pelkkiä vihaisia juntteja ja inceleitä?

Btw this is finland thread now burgers get out

[Anonymous No.5075841]

>>5074191
Im not one to go out of my way to shit on /beg/s but because you asked.. no it doesnt look professional at all. It looks pretty bad

[Anonymous No.5075844]

>>5075841
Huh.
Actually i take it back somewhat these 2 pages look better and more dynamic than the OP pic
>>5074193
>>5074208
Youve got something it just need more practice and better draftmanship

[Anonymous No.5075856]

>>5075474
Whats wrong with furries. It sounds to me like you are one in denial and to compensate youve made your characters a bit grotesque and unaesthetic to try and avoid being called a furry. Just own it. I think you should make them cuter and more furry like.. but you do you

[Anonymous No.5075890]

>>5075803
Mä en kysy sieltä koskaan palautetta, tein aina kokkauslankoja ja mainitsin välill äettä mulla on tällainen projekti ja että osaan piirtää.

En edes postannut mitään muita piirustuksia kuin jotain apustaja töherryksiä ja jotkut nojatuolipicassot alkoi ulisemaan niistä.

Mun mielestä ylilauta edustaa hyvin suomea yleisellä tasolla, samanlaista vammailua joutuu kuuntelemaan aina kun täytyy olla suomalaisten kanssa tekemisissä.
>>5075689
Learn finnish
>>5075856
I wanted to draw animalistic aliens, not anthropomorphic animals, it's really that simple.

[Anonymous No.5075895]

Right now I'm experimenting with gouache, if I don't fuck this one up I'll let you critique it.

To be honest I probably will fuck it up so don't expect anything, I first tried painting two days ago.

So far I've only applied the first layer so it won't end up looking flat lile this, the best thing about gouache is that you can paint over dark coloura with light ones.

[Anonymous No.5075905]

>>5074193
>>5074208
>>5074220
>>5074272
>>5074430
>>5074438
>>5075480

tylsää kamaa, hahmot saman kokosii ja useesti nii vähä muutosta kahen kuvan välil et vois olla animaation key frameja
+ sama kuvakulma kaikissa

[Anonymous No.5075907]

>>5075905
En ymmärrä, voitko sanoa englanniks?

[Anonymous No.5075915]

>>5075907
Big mac spraitilla kiitos!

[Anonymous No.5075916]

>>5075915
Oikeesti, en ymmärrä mitä vittua sä sanoit :D

Jos ei englanniks niin ainakin selkokielellä.

[Anonymous No.5075918]

>>5075890
Minkälaisten vamma-sammakkosuomalaisten kanssa olet joutunut tekemisiin? Voi olla että yliopistokupla vääristää henkilökohtaista Suomi-kuvaani.

[Anonymous No.5075925]

>>5075918
Mä olen myyjä ammatiltani, myyn keräilytavaraa ja käytettyä elektroniikkaa, suomalaiset ja jenkit on vittumaisimpia asiakkaita.
Kaikki muut on asiallisia ja helppoja asiakkaita, kaikki.

Suomalaiset on ihan aivokuolleita, asuin virossa muutama kuukausi sitten ja siellä kaikki suomalaiset mitä tuli vastaan oli aina ihan täysiä degeneraatteja.
Virolaiset vihaa suomalaisia.

Suomen nuoriso toisaalta on niin vammaista, mulla ei montaa omanikäistä kaveria ole koska suurin osa on jotain gettolarppaajia tai wannabe wall street runkkareita joiden sosialisointi ja keskustelutiadot on tasoa pillu, urheilu, juorut, uutiset, työ, koulu ja dokaaminen.

Suomalaiset nuoret on tosi lapsellisia ja henkisesti jälkeenjääneitä pumpulissa kasvaneita.

[Anonymous No.5075927]

>>5075916
Olen erinyymi :D Voin kuitenkin yrittää tulkita mitä nyymi yritti kritiikeillään sanoa. >>5075905

>hahmot saman kokosii ja useesti nii vähä muutosta kahen kuvan välil et vois olla animaation key frameja
+ sama kuvakulma kaikissa
There is not enough change between the panels. It would benefit the comic to have characters pictured in different sizes ( Close ups, far away shots, different angles jne.) and to use more different angles. The panels are generally too similar. So similar that they look like key frames of animation.

Toivottavasti selvensi tuon nyymin kritiikkiä.

[Anonymous No.5075934]

>>5075925
>epäironinen väärä sukupolvi

[Anonymous No.5075939]

>>5075934
Ei vaan suomalaiset mun ikäiset, ei mun ikäiset virolaiset esim. ole niin lapsellisia

[Anonymous No.5075941]

>>5075927
Ok, nyt tajusin.

Suoraan sanottuna toi kuvakulmoen samanlaisuus johtuu siitä että satuin postaamaan samankaltaisia divuja, lisään tähän muutaman lisää joissa näkyy variaatiota.

[Anonymous No.5075957]

[Anonymous No.5075959]

[Anonymous No.5075960]

This one's old, needs a lot of fixing

[Anonymous No.5075964]

Ei mitään järkeä käyttää liika hienoja kuvakulmia jos niillä ei oikeesti ole mitän merkitystä, jos käyttää liikaa hienoja efektejä dilaogisivull niin se efekti vähenee eikä näytä yhtä merkittävältä tärkeässä kohtauksessa.

[Anonymous No.5075995]

>>5075895
Väritys selvästikin korjaa ruutujen samat naamat -efektiä mutta sanoisin että sinun kannattaa silti tehdä olioistasi erilaisempia. Eripituisia ja levyisiä naamoja, erilaisia naaman karvoituksia, erimuotoisia kasvon osia kuten pitkiä tai lyttyjä neniä jne. Käytä sarjakuvan liioiteltavuutta hyväksesi ilmaistaksesi hahmojen luonnetta näiden naamoissa.

Nyt oliot kärsivät sameface-syndroomasta ja näyttävät vähän toistensa klooneilta.

[Anonymous No.5076011]

>>5075995
Tää kasvojen samannäköisyys jakaa todella paljon mielipiteitä, oletan siis että pitää lisätä enemmän erilaisuutta.

[Anonymous No.5076014]

[Anonymous No.5076015]

>>5074191
Aw shit it's you again! Really enjoying your DA man!

[Anonymous No.5076018]

>>5076011
Lontooksi kuvaillen:
>all your characters are so similar and have so similar clothing it looks like a cloning facility

[Anonymous No.5076023]

I can see the effort, the decent perspective, the care put into it.

Yet these ugly bat-dog people would make me never want to read this. If you can't make them pretty, at least make them cool.
Art is 50% skill, 50% appeal.

Pic related also pops into mind.

[Anonymous No.5076040]

>>5076023
Can't please everyone, I'm sticking with these abominations.

[Anonymous No.5076042]

>>5076015
Actually I got really fed up by the pretentiousness and idiots on DA so I started a new account that's private

[Anonymous No.5076107]

>>5074191

>professional?
>no.
>amateur?
>yes.
>good enough to attract readers?'
>yeah.

lots of good stuff going on, i think its pretty interesting. if you finish it at a polished level even amateur can make money/attract people. I like what you have going on.

Look up lazy Nezumi Pro; Consider going full digital, if you want to speed up your work flow.

You can still draw within the cone of vision on PC, in fact its faster and easier and i think if you want to try out different looks/styles digital is king.

If you enjoy traditional that's cool too, but trust me, digital is far better for streamlining workflow. Anyway, art not perfect but good enough to be interesting, if you keep working you will succeed.

ALSO REEE GIVE NAME/LINK DONT POST DECENT SHIT WITHOUT CONTACT INFO.

[Anonymous No.5076130]

>>5076040
>Can't please everyone,
True, but are you pleasing anyone with these designs? I can see people who don't mind the design as long as the story is good, but I can't see people actually thinking it's a cool/charismatic design.

You mentioned having gone through every single experience life has to offer IRL, is there a chance you've blunted your aesthetic discernment for good?

Also, how will the reader differentiate between characters?

[Anonymous No.5076149]

This looks pretty bad. Poor paneling, poor composition, as said before the characters are not appealing or attractive in any way, and also as said, they all look the same.

But you seem to think you have it all figured out and every problem with it is just a "stylistic choice", so you do you and I hope you find success somewhere, but you will be /beg/ forever with that attitude.

[Anonymous No.5076157]

>>5076149
pyw

[Anonymous No.5076181]

>>5076107
Tjanks for the critique, I'm sticking with traditional because it's just not for me and I'm not intending to do art as a job as this is just a passion prpject for me and I already have a business career.

Besides, I don't think that digital would go well with the 60s aesthetics.

I don't use social media, I have a DA page but it's private.
I don't like having followers, I personally don't enjoy keeping up a presence online, I'm just doing my thing.

I'm sure you'll see me around.

>>5076130
>True, but are you pleasing anyone with these designs

Yes I am actually, as I've already said, non artosts seem to really.like the design while for artists the feedback is mixed.
Your opinion on this is already statiatically proven to be subjective, I do appreciate your input though.

>You mentioned having gone through every single experience life has to offer IRL, is there a chance you've blunted your aesthetic discernment for good?

I have no idea where you're going with this but it's beginning to sound like you're not being entirely sincere with your feedback considering what you just said.

>Also, how will the reader differentiate between characters?

These characters must wear a uniform when they're in the housing complex "the floor" but when they go out they will have their own set of clothes on that will create a clear distinction between them, on top of that I'll use different shades for these characters.
One of the main focuses in the story is individualism, whenever they're at the floor they have to act in a certain way, sort of toss away their personalities and views but when they're outside they will be themselves.

>>5076149
I'd be interested in seeing what you would consider good panelling, post a few examples for reference so I can get a clear picture of what you're getting at.

[Anonymous No.5076244]

>>5074191
The thing that strikes me the most as BEG is the cloth folds and the wanky anatomy of the legs, everything else looks fine to me.

[Anonymous No.5076256]

>>5076244
Yea, the clothes are utter shite and I really , really need to work on that.

The anatomy is stiff and doll-like which puts some people off, makes the characters look artificial.

These are my main focuses right now, clearly these two areas are objectively flawed.

[Anonymous No.5076489]

Typical Finnish "draw depressing, ugly dystopia + glorify alcohol + refuse to learn to sketch in a relaxed and loose way".

This shit wins comic awards in Finland, you know. The country that hates beauty.

[Anonymous No.5076502]

>>5074193
>>5076181
Let me elaborate:

The panels do not flow in a logical manner to lead the eye to the next, the sizes and borders are out of sync. The first panel has a completely useless border break with the claw, why? That's distracting and leads the eye downward instead of to the right. If you want a border break, you should have done it with the rabbit's head on the third panel.

The speech balloons need to be uniform and have proper spacing for the words in order to be readable, this shit in the second panel is terrible and distracting from the pace. Readers should not have to readjust their eyes to try and find every new shape you're putting dialogue into. You also need to place the balloons in logical LEFT-RIGHT, TOP-BOTTOM order in the panels to lead the eye and help understand who is talking when. The fourth panel has the reader moving from right to left to read each balloon, which is the wrong direction you want their eyes to go.

That's just basic comic rules, these rules have been figured out through a century of trial and error as to what works. A lot of the mistakes you are making are the same mistakes that were made by professionals in the early 20th century.

That's all aside from your obvious fundamental problems with anatomy, perspective, camera angles, etc.

[Anonymous No.5076506]

>>5076502

[Anonymous No.5076550]

Doesn't look appealing at all.Writing and scenes seem full of clichés that you see in every webcomic out there.

[Anonymous No.5076682]

>>5074191
No. You suffer from the same problem the other people who posted their comics here do: bad paneling. There are plenty of comics out there with barely passable art that work as whole because the paneling and flow is good. For example, in this scene, I think you wanted to showcase the vastness, the grandiosity of the place in comparison with the character and it works because you chose the right perspective for it. What doesnt work is that top right small panel. First because it is out of place, second because it ''bleeds'' with the perspective creating a very ambigous image: is that a new panel or futuristic screen? is it part of the scene or another scene? That, in my opinion is a the flaw in this specific panel. For the others the problem is the orientation confusion where sometimes you expect something to naturally be on one side of the scene but you showcase it on the other, breaking the flow. THe other thing is that I think (other people may disagree) the choice of scenes show is kinda repetitive which snowball with the problems above. Usually those panels where a scene is shown step by step are seldom during the story used for dramatic effect when something big is happening, whereas in your case it seems to be a common ocurrence.

I always say suggest the same thing in theses topics: read Toriyama's book (Akira Toriyama's Hetappi Manga Kenkyūjo, which also have a sequel written by Murata and can be found in any of the usual places) he goes indepth about paneling, reviews stories from readers and all in all gives very good tips to fix these problems.

[Anonymous No.5076707]

>>5076682
>Toriyama's book (Akira Toriyama's Hetappi Manga Kenkyūjo, which also have a sequel written by Murata and can be found in any of the usual places)
I'm not OP, but thank you for making me aware of these books. When you say usual places, what do you mean? I looked on Amazon and didn't find it

[Anonymous No.5076743]

>>5076506
/thread

[Anonymous No.5076834]

1/3

>>5076502
>>5076506
>>5076682
I see exactly what you mean, the panels lack a flow and my attempt at sort of "stopping" the action on the example page doesn't work, a straght line works a lot better for this purpose.

Luckily panels can be altered afterwards very easily using a light table, I'll make a few test examples of each page and pick out the best ones most likely because while I didn't see the suggested straight paneling as the logical option to go for I do see instantly why it would be much better so making alternate versions of each page and then picking out the best one would probably work best for me.

I'm aware of the fact that the dilaogue is not good, I'm planning on rewriting the dialogue based on the ones that I've written down on these pages because I know somebody who's very good at writing dialogue and the plan is to review it through them before deciding on the final script.
I don't trust my ability to write dialogue at all which is why I've left it like this.

The reason why I haven't colourized any pages so far is because I'm planning on coming back to these pages once I'm done with the rest so that I can fix any minor issues, possibly delete some scenes and add bubbles etc.

The suggested speech bubble placement works much better than the original one, I'll definitely look into that.
I haven't gotten the hang of it just yet.

The speech bubbles are no way acceptable at this stage, they're very bad.

The lettering on this page is awful and I was actually surprised when somebody said it was good because it clearly is not, however this is actually the first time I've ever attempted to write clean text on a page.

[Anonymous No.5076836]

>>5076834
2/3

I'm yet undecided on whether I should go for digital or handwritten text, if I chose to do it by hand I'd have to better my handwriting which would take a lot of time and effort and I'm not sure if it would be worth it.

My handwriting is awful anyways so it would probably take up a lot of time for me to make it look consistent and clean.

The use of angles is something that I'll have to disagree with, if I do feel like a certain panel uses wrong angles I will eventually change it though, I recently deleted ~10 pages and completely remade the beginning cutting it down from 55 pages to about 15 because I felt like it was unnecessary and didn't really serve the plot and in 15 pages I could already establish the story and characters well enough.

This is ghe third version of the comic, the previous version were scrapped simply because my drawing skill were so bad that I didn't see any point in keeping those pages as I'd have to redraw them anyway so that they wouldn't look out of place because I've improved very rapidly.

Even pages that I drew five months ago look nowhere near as gold as the more recent ones, the OP page is actually an old one that I tried to fix but clearly didn't succeed in doing that whilr the second post is a more recent page and somebody already pointed out that while the OP looks utter shit the following posts actually look way better.

The OP page used to have no additional panels, it was just one big picture, I might redrawing that scene altogether but I'll have to see what I can do about it in case I might be able to fix it.

[Anonymous No.5076839]

3/3

>>5076836
Basically here's what I need to work on before this thing can be considered plausible:

>paneling
>clothes, wrinkles, folds and creases
>anatomy and gesture
>dialogue
>speech bubbles and text (possibly considering going full digital on this one though)

I refuse to change the design of the aliens but I will look into the anatomy, them being unappealing is strictly an opinion because the feedback I get from that is mixed.
I think the problem is that as many have pointed out, they don't look animalistic or human enough leaving them hover somewhere in the middle which is something that some people don't like but I think it's exactly what an alien species should look like instead of a human body with a dog's head on it or generic bulb headed green men.

While I don't want to be in denial about having bad design choices I do want to retain originality, many suggestions here would end up making the comic look like every other one out there which something that I see being a very common problem with artists.
People praise jack kirby for being a legendary artists but in my opinion his characters look soulless and bland but it's just my opinion, it's obvious that I can't please everyone with the design so I don't see any point in pleasing anyone but myself for that matter.

I'd rather have an original ugly design rather than a generic, derivative and cutesy one.
Most artists prioritize the latter option but I prefer originality, that's just my personal preference though.

There's a lot of work to be done and I'm very motivated to do whatever I can to make this project turn out good and the fact is that it needs a lot of fixing as it stands but I believe that at this stage it's not bad.

[Anonymous No.5076853]

>>5076682
>Toriyama's book (Akira Toriyama's Hetappi Manga Kenkyūjo, which also have a sequel written by Murata and can be found in any of the usual places
Can you link? Ive only seen the first 7 chapters on mangadex.

[Anonymous No.5076854]

>>5076489
I can't disagree with this one, really can't.

This comic is definely not glorifying alcohol use though, I have no idea where you got that from.

Comic awards in Finland are a joke, they mean absolutely nothing.

[Anonymous No.5076876]

>>5076181
>it's beginning to sound like you're not being entirely sincere with your feedback considering what you just said
No, I'm just being rude. It's 4chan, so I won't sugarcoat how much I dislike the designs, I don't think the subjectivity shield applies, but if normalfags like it, ultimately the choice is yours, just be prepared to hear negative opinions a lot.
I will mention Terra Formars' cockroaches as an example of ugly design being no obstacle to the popularity of the show.

[Anonymous No.5076919]

>>5076853
Nevermind, its actually in my city library according to their website. Should I scan and translate it?

[Anonymous No.5077818]

>>5074191
the geometric shapes and perspective are done well, but the character designs and type look very underdeveloped (as well as other organic shapes, like the smoke out of the vents). I think you're at a good spot of skill level, though . Keep working at it, friend!!

[Anonymous No.5077826]

>>5074193
Why are the pants coming off of his butt? Makes it seems as if this is a sex comic or the character is about to get raped.

[Anonymous No.5077832]

>>5076023
Whole-heartedly agree. The character designs look off-putting and no amount of "artistic choice" really contextualizes why they look so weird. I would say draw the heads wider and bigger (take real-world dog/fox/wolf heads as reference) because they look pretty strange. I don't know if it's because you try to fit in the whole head into each box, but they just look super short. Try seeing what the fellas who recently put out Beastars did. Not gonna say all their designs were great, but still.

[Anonymous No.5077868]

I'm redrawing all the panel layout that look off and do some fixed, I'll try to fix the issue with the unnaturally stiff anatomy and weird wrinkles and foöds on clothing.

>>5077818
Yea, i realized that ever since lockdown O haven't actually took time to learn anything theoretically so my learning progress has stagnated, libraries open this wednesday so I'll place reservations for learning material and start learning again.

>>5077826
It's all in your head, coomer

[Anonymous No.5077870]

>>5077832
I'll make a few example drawings for comparing proportions including head sizes, I'll post it later today.

[Anonymous No.5077871]

Also, I'm adding speech bubbles amd text digitally but that comes much later as I don't have the equipment to do that.

[Anonymous No.5077888]

>>5076853
I placed a reservation for this book, sadly I couldn't get in in English.

They had only one copy of making comic by scott mcloud and five reservations so I just pritaded it, if somebody wants the pdf just let me know and I'll upload it on megaupload or something.

[Anonymous No.5077908]

>>5076836
Your handwriting is beautiful you retard. I was about to post asking if you’d release a font. You really have no taste.

(Please give me somewhere to follow you. I want to follow your journey.)

[Anonymous No.5077914]

>>5077908
It really is not lol

https://www.deviantart.com/skyrosscv

[Anonymous No.5077919]

>>5077908
I don't like writing by hand, I always use a typewriter for writing the plot and scrip.

In elementary school we were only.allowed to write in this ugly ass cursive texting script so I had to learn how to write normally on junior high which ended up fucking up my handwriting.

[Anonymous No.5077955]

It looks dated. Like this was drawn in the 90s. Also it’s kinda uncanny. You’re at 60% of the skill level that you’re trying to convey. Just try to nail your perspective and anatomy better.

[Anonymous No.5077968]

>>5074191
your perspective on structures are not but your gestures and characters are boring and unappealing.

Practice your gesture.

[Anonymous No.5078067]

As much as I disagree about these aliens looking uncanny I do want to make sure that it's not just me being delusional and whtnot so I'll make three redesigns of the original one and let you review it.

In my opinion the only uncannyness derives from the shitty anatomy and gesture but what do I know.

There are three main races with slight structural differences, here I will only redesign males.

Despite all the great feedback I've received pointing out objective flaws in my artwork I will keep in mind that most people on this board are a bunch talentless hacks and weebs with clearly biased opinions on aesthetics, I do agree with the fact that something should be changed but I don't want to go full kawaii desu furry futanari on these aliens.

[Anonymous No.5078070]

not lying but I think I have a boner looking at these aliens

[Anonymous No.5078091]

Design B:

>realistic forehead
>smaller eyes
>more realistic eyes

Basically more humanlike

[Anonymous No.5078095]

>>5078070
My financial failure would be a dream come true for you I bet, I ain't commission artist but 20 dollars is 20 dollars.

[Anonymous No.5078173]

Chinese cartoon style

I'm definitely not picking this one but I'll certainly use it in the future, I made a hannah barbera style design once and that will be in the comic too.

[Anonymous No.5078208]

The wordy walls of text coming from these Finns are the surest sign of depression

[Anonymous No.5078221]

>>5078208
Viina teline hernekeitto johannes

[Anonymous No.5078225]

OP I don't want to sound harsh ... So I just won't say a thing.

[Anonymous No.5078231]

>>5078225
Let it all out, please

Regards op

[Anonymous No.5078237]

Definitely not the head that looks off, it's the bad anatomy and gesture

[Anonymous No.5078261]

The background and perspective looks pretty good. Character looks like shit though. If I saw it in a finished comic I'd think they were different artists.

[Anonymous No.5078291]

>>5078261
Yea, I kinda figured so my plan right now is to polish my gesture and anatomy and then redraw all the characters and panels while reusing the old backgrounds

[Anonymous No.5078304]

First page, the closeup of his face has a perspective problem. Nose looks to be pointing one way, mouth and eyes the other way. Might help to have a little model of these guys to keep that consistency. Since they're not human faces, it'll be harder to spot when you're off, and the characters will lose their distinctiveness.
Otherwise I think the faces and expressions are a strength. Particularly the second page--make every face as good as those ones.

Are they supposed to have digitigrade legs? They look like they're just standing on tip toes most of the time.

The lettering is also rough. I'm not a comic artist but I can't see any reason not to do it digitally.

Third page is the worst as far as gestures and anatomy. Bottom left panel in particular, I just don't believe those arms. Feels like you're mushing and stretching anatomy to fit the frames.

One of the reasons crappy artists stay afloat is because they're consistent(-ly bad) across a whole comic. Your quality varies widely from page to page, as if you got tired of doing it and rushed through all those figures on pp3.

Finally--I can't comment on story telling and pacing in a few pages, but it feels like you're kind of dragging things out. Page one feels like it could be done in three or four panels, rather than dedicating a panel to each line of dialogue. Right now it feels like a bad movie, where they pad out the run time with long tracking shots of the characters getting out of the car... then walking up to the house... then opening the door...

[Anonymous No.5078321]

I just looked up a video about gesture, I didn't even know what it was until today.

I've never been to an art class or read a drawing guide so no wonder I've conpletely missed out on this one.

>>5078304
Thanks for the feedback, you made some very good points there that others in this thread didn't.

[Anonymous No.5078354]

>>5078321
Cheers bro, your comic is probably not my cup of tea but it's coming along.

I have done a lot of quick gesture drawing and I can tell you that it doesn't do anything for you besides gaining some confidence in placing figures, and a reminder to keep your figures loose and lively. Make sure to combine it with basic construction and proportion.

You're not far from drawing pretty good characters. If you can ink/complete this well, you're obviously well above the average web comic, but you should aim high, rather than being satisfied with "not being the worst".

I agree with others re: clothes--you're overdoing it with all the lumps and folds rather than suggesting the natural drape of a sleeve in a few strokes. Especially with a military uniform, they can be pretty crisp (and it will also make those crowd scenes feel less laborious).

[Anonymous No.5078403]

>>5078354
Pretty good isn't enough for me, I started drawing for.no other reason but to make this comic and I have zero interest in pursuing anything other than that when it comea to art.

As for my profession that's conpletely unrelated to art, my budget and schedule is virtually limitless so I have no reason to compromise.

I've decided to go back to the drafting table because while the major plot points are really something special in my opinion, I did begin to drag and add in scenes that don't do much to actually forward the story.

Consider everything I've previously made a learning period.

I will try and really configure the anatomy and keep practicing until it's good enough and only at that poinr will I start drawing the actual comic.

Thanks for your input.

My goal right now is to do nothing but practise and write a very specific script, I'll ask a friend of mine who's really good at storywriting to review it before giving it a go.

My work ethic has been too loose previously and I feel like I shoyld start working on this like a professional would in order to reach proper quality standards.

[Anonymous No.5078407]

I will not change the character designs though, only improve the anatomy because in my opinion that's where the problem liez.

[Anonymous No.5078417]

>>5078403
That's great, I hope I see it finished soon. Having a distinct project goal is great motivation, compared to the vague notion of "I wanna git gud"

[Anonymous No.5078427]

>>5074552
Probably because you're a migrant.

[Anonymous No.5078441]

Why do finish people end their sentences with
>:D
????? Do they all look like surdos in real life desu?

[Anonymous No.5078463]

>>5074191
Looks pretty impressive for someone getting into the intermediate level but it isn't professional. You need to work on the appeal and coolness factor with you characters and backgrounds. You seem to have a good understanding with the drawing concepts of various things, now just fine tune it to the professional level. Make more practice comics and experiment with different furry characters performing different actions.

[Anonymous No.5078474]

>>5074289
You stuff is moralizing me to get back into drawing stuff and practicing. Very cool building mate.

[Anonymous No.5078493]

Alright so I just got back from the bookstore and odea here is to fill these folders with concept art, character sheets, plot and whatnot.

Thing is, the worldbuilding that I've done is really extensive and it's comparable to some very well known franchises, I just haven't written down anything because it's all in my head.

I got top grades without reading for tests at school and my nickname was google back in junior high because my ability to memorize information is crazy, I was allowed to skip classes in high school because I already knew more than those courses would teach.

I think the biggest problem here is that I've trusted my ability to memorize things to hold everything together that is related to this comic, while I do remember everything that doesn't mean it's on the top of my mind constantly so I think everything should be written down.
My brain is like a notebook.

I'll design cars, trains, logos, badges, maps to keep the world consistent even if only a fraction of that might show up in the comic.

I dropped out of high school and started my own business because I had zero motivation in joining the rat race.

[Anonymous No.5078496]

>>5078427
That's right, I did migrate from Finland.

I'm a dual citizen.

[Magnus Wootton No.5078535]

How is removing all the mistakes making the picture any better. Is it any more professional? Its equally as boring as when it started, if you were already enjoying it maybe it actually gets a little freakin worse when you remove the "brush strokes!!!"

I hope your not like that, that guy from finland, or ill have to call you one of the other failures from europe, whom im not proud of at all.

[Anonymous No.5078558]

>>5078535
I think you forgot to take your meds today , sir

[Anonymous No.5078596]

>>5078441
Some do :D i smile like a spurdo irl, few of my friends too :D

[Anonymous No.5078607]

>>5078441
Äksdee kaksoispiste viiva deedeedee

[Anonymous No.5078614]

>>5074220
Here's something else to consider: getting faster as you get better isn't just about getting more work done. The quality of the effort is readable to the viewer, even if they don't know what they're responding to. If you are drawing a figure and have to overwork the shit out of it just to get it to a passable state, it will never look to a stranger's eye as natural. When you are experienced and able to knock out figures through intuitive understanding is when your work will have life in it. The level of proficiency will also enable you to engage more deeply in other issues, like composition and color and action. There is no shortcut to developing this skill other than what you're doing now.

[Anonymous No.5079616]

Op, you're beyond delusional and I don't even know why you sought advice here since you reject any criticism given. This is on par with a teenage deviantartist's furry comics. Absolutely nothing about this is redeemable.

The art is terrible, there's no shading whatsoever, your attempts at perspective only accentuate how bad the art is.

The style is bland and generic furrshit any amateur underage furry artist would make. You have absolutely zero capacity to draw fur and no, drawing a crude series of straight lines on the edges of their forms does not make them look like they're covered in fur. And you're not even consistent with attempting to make them look fur.

Every single character looks 100% identical, I assume you think that every animal looks alike so you can use that as an excuse to cover up your laziness or inability to come up with distinct faces. If you think that, you've never seen the actual distinction two dogs of the same breed can have.

No, they're not cute. If you wanted them to be aliens you should make that obvious to somebody who isn't familiar with your story. Your excuse of wanting them to look cute and familiar in order to be empathizable fails when there are countless alien designs which prove you can make something look extremely alien and cute at the same time, why not have them look more human? How bout humans with blue skin and pointed ears? Pic related, an alien design that looks both human enough to be empathizable, and still very alien. Truth is that you're a repressed furfaggot who wanted to draw a furry comic.

The anatomy is horrendous, I can see you didn't even attempt to reference literally anything.

Everything about this is fucking terrible. You want some advice? Throw this entire idea in the fucking trash and go back to go back to the drawing board, and meanwhile learn to fucking draw.

[Anonymous No.5079622]

>>5077968
>your perspective on structures are not but your gestures and characters are boring and unappealing.
>Practice your gesture.

This too

[Anonymous No.5079623]

>>5078091
>>5078173

These all look the same still. You're attempting to stylize before you can even draw. You have to learn the rules before you can break them.

I don't even know what the fuck these la creatura's are supposed to be, but assuming it's a dog which I believe learn to draw real life dogs realistically, then try to draw them in more simpler, exaggerated styles. You're overall trying to do something that is far beyond your skill and knowledge level.

[Anonymous No.5079890]

>>5076839
>I think the problem is that as many have pointed out, they don't look animalistic or human enough leaving them hover somewhere in the middle which is something that some people don't like but I think it's exactly what an alien species should look like instead of a human body with a dog's head on it or generic bulb headed green men.
The problem is more that the alien anatomy/biology is kinda nonsensical. Their legs are made for some kind of fast running creatures but their head implies monkey like life style - and very prey like lifestyle where they needed all those eyes and ears to have advanced warning while they were busy eating.

There is a reason why people default to animal head aliens or just different kinds of humanoid/animals - it's hard to make anatomy look good enough without our brain calling bullshit.

[Anonymous No.5079895]

OP won't accept criticism, only wants people to suck his dick. NGMI

[Anonymous No.5080125]

>>5079616
>>5079895
I have no idea where you got that from concidering the fact that I scrapped all the pages and went back to the writing and designing part.

I'm redesigning the body anatomy while trying to figure out how to improve the art, I've been very open to criticism here in my own opinion.

Questioning opinions doesn't automatically mean rejecting them.

Read the thread before making.up senseless conclusions, idiots.

[Anonymous No.5080143]

>>5079616
Also the fact that you're whining about lack of shading in lineart proves that you're not really sincerely analyzing what you're seeing here.

Your criticism is actually somewhat correct but the narcissism and bitterness in your way of expression these opinions is something that I don't get and it seems to overwhelm you in a way that it really wears down your ability to evaluate and analyze.

Jesus, you children need to go outside every now and then.

Get some fresh air and maybe some life experience, being on 4chan isn't an excuse to act like a total cunt.

[Anonymous No.5080153]

>>5079623
>You're overall trying to do something that is far beyond your skill and knowledge level

Well put, I'm going back to learning before attempting to get back to this project.

[Anonymous No.5080373]

>>5077868
>It's all in your head, coomer

Then why did you include it? How are his pants coming off unless they are way too big for him or someone is actively pulling them down? Having them come down and expose his butt while some big dude whisks him off insinuates a lot. Have you ever been held upside down and your pants came off your ass?

You are asking people if your work is 'professional enough,' but as a storyteller you have to be aware of those things. The only other conclusion I can come to is that the author is a perv.

[Anonymous No.5080374]

>>5079895
Yeah, this. OP is an asshole.

[Anonymous No.5080403]

>>5080373
>Have you ever been held upside down and your pants came off your ass?

Yes, not held upside down but dragged though but same outcome.

[Anonymous No.5080407]

>>5080403
>Yes, not held upside down but dragged though but same outcome.

.....do you have something you'd like to tell us anon?

[Anonymous No.5080410]

>>5080407
Low quality bait

Mees nyt vittuun siitä

[Anonymous No.5080428]

Oh hi, we watch each other on DA. Small world, eh?

Anyways; your architecture looks nice, but I always thought your characters could do with more to "tell them apart" from each other. It's very difficult to tell who is who, which I know from experience can be difficult to do with aliens, but perhaps working on their outfits or other features could help with this. Aside from that, your clothing folds need a bit of work, and the pictures feel "incomplete" with a lack of shading and lighting. In the current state, I wouldn't consider them unprofessional: just giving a feeling of being unfinished.

tldr: your architecture and vehicles are your strong areas, your character design is your weak area.

[Anonymous No.5080477]

>>5080428
>your architecture and vehicles are your strong areas, your character design is your weak area.

Indeed, I came to realize this just now which is why I'm going to improve those skills and redesigns whatever looks off.

Architecture and cars mena nothing if the most important part of the comic, the characters look shite.

It's like a bicycle without the wheels at this stage.

[Anonymous No.5080695]

>>5079616
That's just an elf lmao

[Anonymous No.5080933]

>>5074191
I've seen worse "professional" work, so I guess so.Your figure drawing could use some work, but I doubt your average comic book reader would really pay much attention to that sort of thing.

[Anonymous No.5080937]

>>5079616
kill yourself. Trashing someone's art for no reason isn't productive or helpful, and it certainly doesn't make you look elite.

[Anonymous No.5080938]

>>5080933
>I doubt your average comic book reader would really pay much attention to that sort of thing

I think they would, the anatomy is stiff and makes the characters look a bit uncanny and doll-like as a result.

I'm going to redesign the body anatomy and then start over.

Somebody also mentiomed that the story seems badly written and that it seems to drag too much which is something I've also noticed, I never wrote a script beforehand, only thr plot and I feel like that might be the cause for that so I'm writing a script for every page now.

[Anonymous No.5080978]

>>5080933
The average reader might not notice fine details, but definitely will notice when things are "off" like the product of a weak grasp of fundamentals

[Anonymous No.5081399]

>>5074191
>horizon line inside composition in three point

[Anonymous No.5081430]

There is no way you actually find someone who likes those alien designs, it's by far the worst part about it

[Anonymous No.5082243]

>>5081430
They're cool. I like them. Not OP.

[Anonymous No.5082405]

>>5081399
That's all intentional, it's a "false" four point perspective.

[Anonymous No.5082419]

Feels empty, character has very awkward pose

[Anonymous No.5082434]

>>5081430
They are very weird and uncanny, even for aliens... badly drawn furry characters.

[Anonymous No.5082451]

>>5079616
Based and truthpilled.

[Anonymous No.5082508]

>>5074191
OP this is mostly beginner work and you have a long way to go, but even if this were flawless professional work nobody would care, because it's not coom and the characters aren't made to tickle a fetish. It doesn't matter if you draw this any better, so just get it finished.