/ic/ - Artwork/Critique

>the comic

>>6709911
Hey buddy /co/ is Two blocks down

>>6710003

why its sharing artwork

is this a discord poster

>>6710003
aren't you the 16 year old that spams your awful OC constantly?
Btw I had an OC named "Fred" when I was a kid too that looked almost just like yours.

>>6710206
>>6710003
Now kiss

>>6709911
Anon, I'm only on page 50 but this is really REALLY good dude. Do you mind if I show this to someone?

oof :l

Why didn't you at least study some perspective before drawing this comic? Gives me a headache. Good job though, you started something and finished it.

I really like it. Is that all there is so far? I think you should storytime it on /co/ if you've got it in you to post all of the images twice.

kino & gmi
never stop anon

>>6709911
You remind me about Chris chan
>childish style
>self-insertion
>that fuckin goku hairstyle
>depressives and awkward
>that "different from the others..." line literally on the first page
>long ass story about yourself
>like anime and video games
>autism

nice, i liked the ending

>>6709924

oh i like this comparision. i love stories like welcome to the nhk as well

>>6710332

hm i get what you are saying.

personally i think the grayscale makes it look a bit messy. should i switch to pure black and white? pic related from me

>>6710883
Personally I like the grayscale, hell go full color

>>6710206
Post him faggot.
>>6710183
And critique retard
>>6710332
This
>>6710531
This

>>6710855
This

Tldr fuck off

>>6710855
It’s a long story about what is ultimately a completely unremarkable experience.

Ironically, despite supposedly “growing up”, the attitude of the author as well as his approach to problem solving is still incredibly childish. That is, to automatically feel helpless, confused, and to wallow in self-pity as opposed to identifying problems and forming a plan to achieve his goals.

>>6711106
dude you are so incredibly obnoxious. Are you autistic? Do you have eyes? How do you think that youre entitled to an opinion when your art looks like that?

You have to be 18 or older to post on 4chan

white people be like MUH FEELINGS ME ME ME

>>6711124
>>6711146
man the people on this board have been trained to blindly hate anything that isnt an 18th century nude 15 year old or animeslop.

Wait until you find out that high level professional artists have an appreciation for all art and don't react to everything like smug nasty little teenagers

>>6711146
Is Domee Shi white now too

https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/modern-warfare/list?title_no=773555

check out my other comic here

pic related is my 3rd one, currently doing clean up and translation to english

>>6711350
>political
lost me

>>6709911
Amateurhafte Zeichnungen. Verstaubte Designs. Mangelnde Komposition. Und trotz all dem ist dies ein verdammt guter Comic den man nicht zu Seite legen kann! Jeder kann sich technische Fähigkeiten aneignen, doch nur die Wenigsten können eine gute Geschichte erzählen. Dein Comic hat Herz. Dein Comic hat Seele. Bitte mehr davon

>>6711107
So, I'm right.
Autism.

>>6711496
That's just an expression of German culture.

>>6709911
Not bad. The content doesn't bother me because I've bought and read worse memoirs from the bookstore.

>>6711412
>>6710880

OK before this thread disapears, I appreciate any longer critique of the story or w/e

>>6713123
Honestly man you need to read Save the Cat or something. It's a really bad book about how to make a generic, paint-by-numbers screenplay by a guy who's only written terrible movies like Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot! but you really need to take a hard look at your structure. It's hard to critique the art because it's frankly pretty pre-/beg/, you'll be served by doing studies of comics you like, preferably with a simple art style that you can ape with your current fundamental skills.
Decide what it is you want to say. Decide what changes your character's life forever. Give us just enough information to like your character, and then change his life forever. Show us how he reacts to his change in circumstances. Show us what he wants and how he's going to get it. Set him back, then set him back even harder. Keep piling on until it seems like he's lost everything, then pull him back from the brink. Right now it's a long, torpid series of seemingly unrelated events. And then this happened. And then this happened. I like what the South Park writers do - when they write a plot out, they never use the word "and" - only "but" and "therefore". "This happened THEREFORE this happens, BUT this happens" etc. It's all very Screenwriter 101, but honestly your script atm is below undergrad level, so getting it to the level of a freshman film student would be leaps and bounds. Not trying to be a dick, just taking some time to give you honest feedback because you seem passionate and dedicated. In the meantime, keep grinding your fundies. Accuracy, markmaking, and master copies. Perspective and gesture. Line of action will be extremely important for a cartoonist. Maybe browse John K.'s blog but don't take as gospel. Good luck, or however you say that in German. Lurk /co/ moar.

>>6713155

hi what you think of my 2 newest illustrations?

>>6713123
>>6710883

better?

i go to an art school with a comics course, and the biggest critique i got is problems with clarity and too much grey. thats why i am thinking of going pure b/w

btw here is some digital illustrations of me

>>6713204
>hi what you think of my 2 newest illustrations?
They're bad, man. I'm sorry but there's a severe lack of fundamentals. Read the /beg/ sticky. You're going to an art school and they're telling you your problem is too much gray? I think you need your money back. Not even trying to be a dick but lots of these art schools are perfectly happy to take your money and stick you in adult daycare for 4 years. I hope what I said about comic writing sunk in.

>>6713207

i read the /beg/ and its the same stuff that's taught at school

personally i don't get what u are saying regarding art (keep saying fundies, get's nobody anywhere)

anywho, here is fellow student who graduated with the following work from the same school. curious what you say about that

>>6713207

keep saying fundies is not constructive

anywho here are examples of graduates from that same school:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/13Shhlpj0tRutPyvNawh5T-I8Bnd98vaF/view

curious what you say about that

>>6713207

ALSO I hope at the very least, you can see about a big of progress in those 60 pages i posted

>>6713211
alright whatever man good fuckin luck

Read up to page 26.

Sometimes there is some creative ambition, like in this page >>6709916
But it's all pointless if you are not drawing well. There is a difference between drawing realistic/complex forms and just dominating a simple, yet appealing style.
The latter is way easier to attain and you should try to.

Story-wise, there is no story, this is a glorified blog about your nothingburger and unoriginal life. The unfiltered honesty through the autism prism isn't a problem in and of itself, but truth is no one has any reason to care about your life story, this comic is pointless.

Your self-absorption is the reason why you have no friends, no art skill and no story to tell.
And I'm not saying that as a HAHA, GOTCHU!, this is what your comic is telling me.

If instead of caring so much about yourself you cared about the world around you and its possibilities, generating new and creative things, people would pay attention to you and you wouldn't have to be a full-time self-fellating coping artist.

Sort out your life goals.

>>6713212
If anything you got worse

Is this the mythical "Tardku" the people in the DBZ threads on /a/ talk about so much?

The protagonist reminds me of that "How To Pet A Dog" comic that gets posted around here lol

>>6714700

oh nice did you draw that?

Bump

>>6716606
Don't bump this shit thread please, you've ignored all the advice you've been given so far. Fuck off.

>>6716608
No I didn't. I just want more advice/feedback

>>6711146
kek

either way this was a positive thread and i see it as a win because a few positive comments on 4chan is a win imo

also i sold some at conventions, so there were also people willingly putting down a few bucks

im happy

but i will improve

bye

this could've been cool but every page had fucking goku in it wtf kek

>>6719099

its because its a childhood OC i created that I self insert in. the goku MC creates a goku MC for his comic book

>>6709911
I just finished reading it all and I really like the layout of a lot of your pages. Some of this comic hits a little too close to home for me but it's really nice to find something like this to relate to. Something it reminded me of Zerocalcare's comics. The look of the traditional pencil scratches and later on I think ink was a very nice touch that really does it justice. Keep up the good work anon, I'll be making sure to keep track of anymore of your works

>>6719421

thx anon. here me instagram: https://www.instagram.com/arts_designs_by_a_d/

This is the problem with Millennial artists. They're only interested in making their work about themselves. And they're all incredibly boring.

Well, it was good enough to get me to read all the way until the end. Your comic is very witty and the style is very cute, congrats, I'm a bit jealous.